Disclaimer: I do not own The Phantom of the Opera, but The Phil is mine.

Author's Note: Thank you to my reviewers and to my wonderful story editors Penmora Zenith, Musicallover, and Archeology101.

Chapter 49

Second Chances

Friday

Erik was amused by Roan's shock after he'd called him a liar, and he was still smiling after he had returned to his car and driven off. He'd known there was something strange about his IM conversation with Christine a few nights ago, though he hadn't been able to determine what it was at the time. But after this meeting with Roan, he had no doubt.

Roan underestimated my relationship with Christine. If I didn't know her as intimately as I do, I would have missed his deception altogether. It's out of character for her to send Roan to tell me to stay away. We had too much respect for each other, and she would never send someone else to tell me such a thing. She would have told me herself, either in person or on the phone.

Was it possible he was wrong? He conceded that it was, but he seriously doubted it, and to prove it, he took out his cell phone and dialed.


It had always struck her as a somewhat amazing phenomenon, the dynamics of clutter. It seemed to accumulate on its own, yet when it reached its saturation point and needed clearing, sure enough, they were items she'd gathered herself. Amazing.

Christine was on her knees in the closet, going through boxes of clothes, shoes and old magazines when she heard the phone. She was actually glad for an excuse to leave the closet for this was going to be a two-day project. She quickly brushed her hands on her old jeans and pushed her hair aside as she answered the phoned.

"Hello?"

"Christine?"

"Erik?" She couldn't believe he was calling her.

"Yes, it's me. How are you?"

"I'm fine. How are you?" Flustered, she tried to gather her thoughts.

"I'm fine. Christine, you're right that you can't love someone without trust. That's what I need to talk to you about. This is very important. I wanted to ask if you would meet with me tomorrow so we can talk?"

"Tomorrow?"

"Yes, tomorrow, if you have a few minutes. Please…"

Christine was shocked. She never imagined he would call her, and now he wanted to meet with her. "All right…I'll be free around two."

Erik closed his eyes momentarily and breathed a sigh of relief. "I'll be at the Japanese Tea Gardens. Thank you."

"Bye."

Christine set the phone down gently, dazed at what had just happened. She was going to meet with Erik tomorrow. How did she really feel about that? Nothing's changed. He's just going to talk to me about trust, but there won't be anything he can do to prove that he trusts me.

She returned to the closet and resumed organizing, top to bottom, all the while thinking about her meeting tomorrow…


Friday evening

Amir was dressed elegantly in a suit and tie as he pulled up to Joanna's apartment building. He was reminded of Megan's attempt to keep him from responding to Joanna's instant message the other night and thought how unnecessary that had been. He was committed to Megan, yet she seemed insecure about his concern over Joanna's success for the year she would be in the United States. He thought it was strange that she should be so paranoid since he'd never done anything to make her so, but as he took the elevator to Joanna's floor, he realized that he was actually looking forward to seeing her. This confused him, for earlier, he remembered thinking that he would rather have taken Megan out tonight instead of Joanna. He had considered tonight's dinner just another part of his job, yet now, he felt a definite eagerness.

He knocked lightly on her door and Joanna opened to him a few moments later, smiling broadly.

"You look beautiful," Amir smiled.

"Thank you. Let me get my coat." She went to her bedroom and returned quickly wearing her coat and carrying a small purse. "I'm ready."

Amir escorted her downstairs to his car and opened her door. She hopped in gracefully, and as he walked around to his side and got in, he was vaguely reminded that before Megan, this very scenario used to play out repeatedly several times a week. He thought it strange that he would think of that now. When he had seen Megan earlier tonight, he had told her of his dinner plans with Joanna to thank her for filling in last week, and though Megan hadn't been pleased, she had understood his obligation.

They spoke little on their way to the restaurant, but in the closed confines of the car, he could smell Joanna's perfume and everything about her. When he would look over at her, she would smile gracefully, and he found himself thinking Does she even realize how beautiful she is?

When they arrived at Petrucci's Italian Ristorante, Joanna was delighted by the old world décor of the building and the romantic twinkling lights that were in the trees and around the grounds. They alighted at the entrance while a uniformed valet parked the car, and a genial doorman opened the large door for them as they entered the lobby. An attractive hostess led them to an elegant table in a corner and Amir helped Joanna with her coat before pulling her chair out for her.

It was a reasonably busy Friday night, but the efficient wait staff ensured that Petrucci's provided an intimate dining experience. Amir had selected Petrucci's for their outstanding food and service, but now realized that it was also quite romantic. He could tell that Joanna was very pleased with their surroundings, and they ordered cocktails as their hostess left their menus.

"I haven't had Italian food since I left Vienna," Joanna smiled as she looked over the menu selections.

"What kind of Italian food do you like?"

As she looked over the menu, she seemed undecided. "I like all kinds, but I think I'll order the lasagna. It's always been one of my favorites." Their waiter arrived shortly thereafter with their drinks and took their order, both deciding on the lasagna. Joanna was staring at the flowers and the small candle that glowed on their table.

"You know, when I first began singing, it was as if an entirely new world opened up for me. And now that I'm doing it for a living, I can't imagine ever doing anything else."

Amir nodded. "You have to have that single-minded dedication if you're going to succeed because it takes more than just getting up on stage and singing your heart out. It's hours and hours of rigorous training to make your voice the best it can be, but of course you already know that."

"Yes, my tutor at the conservatory has me on a practice schedule, and his exercises are progressive to strengthen my voice. My family has been pleased with my progress."

"You're fortunate to have the support of your family. You must miss them very much."

At this, Joanna looked a little sad. "Yes, I do miss them. I was very close to my parents and to my brothers, but it'll probably only be for a year, and then I'll be back home again. But I've really appreciated your kindness and friendship. You're the only one I have that I can talk to now. With Victoria making it difficult, I don't think I could stand it if you weren't there…"

Her voice was about to break, and Amir saw that tears were forming in her eyes. He placed his hand over hers and squeezed it gently. His heart went out to her for he understood her anguish. She'd come alone to this country with great talent and hopes, only to find her efforts challenged at every turn by those who were jealous of her talent and beauty. It was so unfair, but part and parcel of the business, something everyone had to overcome in order to succeed. He was determined to help her. She was too sweet and beautiful to be overcome by these forces she was unprepared for.

"Joanna, I'll always be here to help you in any way I can," he said sincerely, and he was glad when this elicited a small smile from her.

When their food arrived, it looked wonderful, and they enjoyed it as they conversed easily together. Amir took pleasure in her company and found her conversation both interesting and stimulating. She was well-educated and her opinions well-reasoned, occasionally questioning him on some of his own ideas, which he found delightful. As music director of the Phil, it was rare indeed for anyone to question any of his decisions or ideas.

When they'd finished dinner, their waiter returned to clear their plates and inquired if they would like dessert, suggesting their specialty: zabaglione over fruit.

"That sounds wonderful, but I don't think I have room," Joanna lamented.

"We'll take that with two spoons," Amir ordered with a smile.

When the waiter brought their dessert, it was beautifully presented and Amir was amused by how eagerly Joanna dipped into it. Although he took a couple bites of the fruit, Joanna ultimately ate the lion's share of the entire dessert.

"Good?" he asked humorously.

"Mmm, I loved it!"

After dessert, Amir paid their bill and they returned to the car. It was still relatively early and the stars were out as they drove off. Joanna was feeling very good after such a fine meal and turned to Amir. "Thank for you dinner, it was wonderful. I'm having such a good time, I wish it didn't have to end."

Amir was also having a good time and he had an idea. "Would you like to go for a walk?"

Joanna was charmed. "I'd love to! Where?"

Amir drove them to Fisherman's Wharf. Although it was late evening, the restaurants and shops along the wharf were still crowded, but the lighted pier itself was almost deserted. It was cool this evening, so Joanna put her arm through Amir's as they strolled to the end of the pier.

When they reached the end, they looked out along the water and could hear the waves gently lapping against the support beams under the pier. The lights from across the way reflected and shimmered in the water, and the stars overhead twinkled serenely. Although rain was forecast for the following week, there were no clouds in the sky tonight.

"It's so beautiful here," Joanna murmured as she listened to the waves hitting the supports beneath them. "And so much warmer than back home."

"Yes, we're very fortunate. Good weather, nice people, culture… But Vienna's very beautiful, too. I was there many years ago."

"Yes, I miss it. We had a concert every season at the Conservatory, and in the summertime, a grand concert in the park. It was so much fun! My family would go to all the concerts because my brothers and I always participated."

"Your family is very musically inclined."

"Yes, our whole family loved music, but so far, I'm the only one that wants to make a living at it."

"If you keep progressing as you have been, you'll probably get your wish."

Joanna smiled. "Do you really think so?" she asked softly.

"Absolutely." Amir turned to look at her, but unexpectedly found himself falling into the depths of her astonishingly blue eyes...and those lips...

He abruptly turned from her and walked several paces away.

"Amir, what's wrong?" She looked after him and was concerned by his strange behavior.

After a moment, he turned and smiled easily. "Nothing, but we'd better get going. It's getting late."

They walked back down the pier again and returned to the car. As Amir drove her home, he thought about what had almost happened. He had turned to look at her when he'd suddenly realized how incredibly beautiful she was, and when he glanced down at her perfectly formed lips, he'd almost kissed her. He'd pulled himself away just in time, before he'd embarrassed himself, and her. He would take her home and then go to bed. It was a little late, but everything was still all right.

When they arrived at her apartment building, Amir walked her to her door. She unlocked it and then turned to him.

"Thank you so much for this evening. I had a wonderful time," she said sincerely.

"I'm glad," he said softly. "We'll see you tomorrow, Joanna."

But before he could go, she captured his lips in a gentle kiss. It was brief, but he was shocked and froze. When she saw his hesitation, she kissed him again, and lingered.

Amir's mind had gone blank the moment their lips met. Her lips were so soft. He didn't know what to think, and then vaguely, his lips remembered, and he began to respond…


Saturday, 1:45 p.m.

Everyone backstage was preparing for the matinee performance and there was less than fifteen minutes to curtain time. Everything was in place and everyone was ready, so it was now just a matter of waiting. Amir was pleased with the work of his cast and crew and he had just completed his backstage check before going to take his seat. He walked quickly to the back of the theatre and behind the curtained entry that hid the stairs leading up to the balcony.

As he neared the stairs, Joanna appeared from around the curtains and approached him. Wondering what she was doing there so close to curtain time, he was about to ask when she suddenly attempted to kiss him, her lips making brief contact before he grasped her arms and backed away.

"Joanna, what are you doing? You know I'm with someone, and you should be backstage by now."

She seemed somewhat disappointed, but not one to be put off entirely, she took his hand in both of hers and held it affectionately. "I know, but I just wanted to thank you again for dinner last night. I had such a good time… it just made my week," she smiled.

"Well, I'm glad. Now off with you before you're late," and he gestured toward the stage.

She hurriedly left, and Amir shook his head as he walked up the stairs. Why does my heart stop whenever her lips are on mine? And that wonderful perfume…


Megan was looking forward to seeing Amir although she saw him just last night, but since telling her about his dinner plans with Joanna, she was curious to hear how it went, and so thought to surprise him at work.

It was likely he'd be busy up until the performance, so she reasoned that he would be free shortly before. She went up to his office, but not finding him there, decided to go backstage, and not seeing him there, she was about to take the stairs up to the balcony when she saw Joanna go through the curtains that led to the stairway. On a hunch, she parted the curtains slightly to look in, and she saw Joanna approach Amir and kiss him, or at least try to. Megan was stunned by Joanna's audacity, and wondered how Amir would react. She saw him take Joanna's arms and back away from her, and he seemed surprised. She'd heard everything, and when he told her to get backstage, Joanna hurriedly left, rushing past Megan without seeing her. When Megan looked back at Amir, he was going up the stairs.

She was pleased with his response, but she didn't want him to know she'd been there when he'd had this encounter with Joanna, so she decided to leave. She would see him tonight…


Saturday, 2:00 p.m.

Japanese Tea Gardens

Christine hadn't been here in years. Her parents had brought her here when she was a little girl, and she could still remember how enchanted she'd been by the Japanese deer and koi ponds that dotted the gardens. It was beautiful and peaceful, and she wondered why she'd never returned.

As she parked her car, she didn't see Erik's car and wondered if he was there yet. She walked towards the entrance and noted that it hadn't changed much from when she'd last been there. There was a large red Japanese gate and a tall flagpole just inside the grounds with large pink, blue, and green fish blowing gaily in the breeze. Everything about the gardens spelled tranquility, and since she felt a little nervous, thought it was the perfect place for their meeting.

Branches from tall shade trees hung over both sides of the walkway, causing the sun's rays to be dappled on the ground. As she made her way down the path, she saw a number of beautiful birds and butterflies in the trees and bushes and thought it interesting that they seemed to stay within the boundaries of the gardens. The sun felt warm and wonderful, and the sounds and smells of nature all around her put her at ease. There was a wooden bridge spanning the koi pond which Christine remembered from her childhood, and it still looked the same. As she walked across it to the middle, she looked down into the water and saw a number of beautiful multi-colored koi casually swimming by. When she'd been with her mother and father, they would purchase fish food from convenient vending machines placed near the ponds and feed the koi. Precious memories she thought. She leaned on the railing as she looked into the water and felt very much at peace. Where's Erik? He didn't say where in the gardens to meet him.

"Thank you for coming, Christine. It's wonderful to see you again."

Christine froze, startled out of her reverie by his voice just behind her. She hadn't heard him approach on the bridge, but as she turned, Erik stood casually on the other side, his hands resting on the railing to each side. She thought he looked as wonderful as she'd always remembered, just as handsome, just as alluring, and realized that she'd always thought so, from the first moment she had seen him.

"Hello, Erik, it's good to see you, too." She didn't know what else to say, but since he'd been the one to ask her here, decided that it was his show.

"Let's walk," he invited, and they started strolling leisurely along the path.

It seemed strange in a way, being together again, yet with an unseen wall between them now. He wanted her back, yet an intangible condition kept them apart. Why do things have to be so complicated? she thought.

They strolled in silence for awhile. Erik walked with his hands clasped behind his back and seemed to be thinking. When he'd first spied her on the bridge, he thought Christine looked as wonderful as ever. She'd chosen to wear her hair tied back with a ribbon, and he was surprised but pleased to see that she wore the necklace he'd given her on their first date. He chose his words carefully, for he didn't want to waste their time together. "Christine, I've made a terrible mistake, and I take full responsibility for it." He stopped walking at this point to turn and face her. "I'm deeply sorry that I didn't believe you when you told me you hadn't been with Roan. You'd never given me cause to distrust you, but it was my own jealousy that caused me to jump to conclusions. I know I said some terrible things to you that day, but I hope you can forgive me. I'm so sorry, Christine," he said softly.

She looked up at him and felt that he probably was very sorry, and felt, too, that apologizing wasn't something he was used to doing. She didn't say anything, but looked away and began strolling again. She remembered that horrible day vividly, she would never forget it. She'd never been hysterical before, but when he'd told her to go, she had felt totally bereft and cut off from any connection or bond that held her world together. It was the most horrible moment of her life. If she were to forgive him, would it not negate what had happened that day? Perhaps she could forgive him someday, she thought, but not today.

When Christine didn't respond, Erik knew that she hadn't forgiven him. What did you expect? his conscience mocked. Did you forget the anguish you put her through that day? The terrible words you accused her with? You deserve this and more...

As he walked behind her, he said, "Christine, please let me try to explain about my past, and then perhaps you can understand why I reacted the way I did. I admit it was wrong, but it was a reaction based on things that happened before we'd met."

Christine stopped and turned. She'd had questions about his past before but had never had the opportunity to ask him about it. Perhaps now she'd get some answers. "All right."

They walked slowly along the winding path through the gardens, as Erik began. "I suppose I'd best start at the beginning. I told you before of how I didn't get along with my family. It actually goes much deeper than that. My family was wealthy, but from my earliest memories, there were two things that were constant: the feeling of not being wanted, and having to wear a mask…"

Erik proceeded to tell her about his family, the attempted surgeries on his face, sibling rivalry, his first girlfriend, being sent to study in Italy, and then, finally, about his last girlfriend before Christine and her attempts to get him to remove his mask.

They'd stopped at another koi pond and bought some feed to throw into the water. Christine had been silent as Erik spoke of his past, but she felt her heart go out to this brilliant man who was shunned by his own family and who searched for love, only to be rejected because of his deformity. She understood now why he refused to remove his mask for her…he feared her rejection since that was what he'd experienced twice before. "I'm so sorry," she said softly. "I never knew, but I understand now why you didn't want to take off your mask."

Erik threw some feed into the water. "Yes, because of what I'd been through, I just couldn't take the chance of losing you for the same reason. I'm not sure what I expected to do about it, but I just chose not to think about it until it came up again, and I decided that it would no longer be an issue when the mask no longer mattered to you."

Christine looked at the numerous koi in the water. "I realized it when I saw you at Gaston's with Joanna. I'd been worrying about the mask when it was you that mattered, not the mask. That's why I came back that night, so I could tell you."

So that's why she was there. She wanted to tell me the mask didn't matter any more… and she saw me in bed with Joanna. "I went and looked for you after you ran out, but I couldn't find you."

"I went to stay with a friend," she said quietly, remembering how she'd run to Roan that night.

"I said some terrible things to you. I was angry, crazy with jealousy. I just couldn't believe that anyone could be faithful to me if there was someone else you could be with that didn't have to wear a mask."

Christine was struck by the irony of this. "Yes, Roan's very handsome, and so was Rick, but they weren't you. I was wrong when I got upset about your mask, but I know that that's not important now. From the moment I first saw you, I always thought you were the handsomest man I'd ever seen."

At this, Erik looked over at her, and he saw that she was gazing at him sincerely. She really thinks I'm handsome? He felt a bitter pain in his heart at this revelation, the truth of it striking him like a blow. So much time wasted when they could have been together working this out. Damned, pathetic FOOL! his conscience shouted angrily.

He turned away from her then, facing the pond, and brought his hands up to his face. He had to wipe away the tears that were forming. She thought I was handsome all this time…and she loved me. What have I done?

"Erik, are you all right?"

His heart was in pieces, and he couldn't speak. He didn't turn around, but when he felt her hand on his arm, he murmured brokenly, "I'm sorry…I'm so sorry, Christine. I'm so sorry…"

She could tell he was sobbing, and she wrapped her arms around him from behind. "It's all right, it's all over now, it's all right," she whispered soothingly. He really regrets what he's done she thought.

When he'd gathered himself, they went to sit on a bench that was set among the trees, and he asked softly, "Does he treat you well?"

Christine looked into the water. "Yes, he does. He's been very kind to me."

Erik nodded. "I'm glad. Do you love him?"

She shook her head. "We haven't been together that long, but we're very close." She had a question on her mind that she'd been wondering about since the week before. "Are you still with Joanna?"

He shook his head and whispered, "No. It was a mistake."

Christine nodded and then stood, and she walked over to the pond. She placed some coins in the vending machine to get some more fish food and threw a few into the water. She watched as the koi came to feed, and she admired the variety in their coloring. Erik came to stand by her and watch.

"You know, the mating rituals of koi are quite interesting," he said softly. "When a female is filled with eggs, the males bump and jostle her, in effect trying to dislodge the eggs from her so they can fertilize them. It looks like a bunch of fish ganging up on one fish, but that's how they procreate."

Christine smiled. "That is interesting, but not very romantic. I'm glad humans don't do it that way."

Erik smiled for the first time. When Christine was done feeding the fish, they walked along and came upon a pontoon bridge that was about twenty feet across spanning a large pond. There was a sign next to the bridge explaining its origin and also giving a warning to those brave enough to venture across despite the rope rail on either side of it. The sign read that the Buddhist monks who first constructed the tea gardens used it as a training exercise as well as a game, and that all of the monks had been able to traverse it successfully as opposed to one out of ten of the general population.

As they read the sign and then looked at the bridge, Christine wondered if she could possibly cross it. It really didn't look difficult for the pontoons were hollow wooden blocks with enough buoyancy to keep one from getting wet. She walked up to the bridge and looked across to the other side.

"Um, Christine…?" Erik wondered if she would attempt it.

She looked back at him and smiled mischievously before grabbing the guide ropes on either side of the bridge and starting across. With her first step on the initial pontoon, she was shocked when it began to submerge under the weight of her footstep, and she immediately tried to compensate by bringing her other foot to step on the next pontoon, which likewise began to submerge under her weight. They actually looked quite stable undisturbed, but being hollow, merely floated on the water. Although she had a firm grip on the guide ropes, she knew she was going to fall as she teetered precariously and shrieked.

Suddenly, she felt herself being lifted up by strong arms and thrown over Erik's shoulder as he held onto a guide rope with his left hand and held her firmly on his shoulder with his right. Her view from this vantage point was harrowing to say the least when all she could see were submerged pontoons suddenly springing back up in the water as Erik took the next step. She felt surprisingly secure on his back until they were both safely across, and then he set her gently down on the ground.

Christine was amazed as she tried to regain her composure, and as she turned to look back at the pond, saw that the pontoons were still swaying from their recent crossing twenty feet back. "My god, how were you able to do that! Have you done this before?" she asked incredulously.

"Actually, this was my first time, but I've always had pretty good balance," Erik replied honestly.

"Amazing…" she muttered to herself.

When they were back at the entrance to the gardens, there was a display on the side of the gift shop building of small, colorful slips of paper with graceful Japanese characters which they were invited to take. They were supposedly Japanese fortunes, and they each took one as they made their way out and back to the parking area.

Erik walked Christine back to her car and wondered if there could possibly be another time. "Christine, thank you for meeting with me today. I know you're dating Roan now, but, I'd like to see you again."

Christine looked away uncertainly. It had been a pleasant afternoon, but she didn't want any more drama in her life, and she'd never had more drama than when she'd been with Erik. "I don't know…"

"Please, Christine…just to talk, during the day." He held his breath as she pondered this and what it could mean.

She was dating Roan now. Would it be cheating to talk to Erik like she did today? She didn't think so, although she was sure Roan would probably disagree. Finally, she made up her mind.

"All right…just to talk."

Erik smiled gratefully. "Thank you."

"Good-bye."

"Bye, Christine."