Chapter 53

Just as Meenah's ship was touching down on the Battlefield, Jack was killing some Dersites in that same location to get the Black King's attention.

"This is what power looks like!" Jack screamed at a group of soldiers as he flew over them. He shot at them with his plasma pistol, grinning as they ran for cover. A few smarter ones flew up with their own magical capes to meet him, but Jack just used the wind-up key on his back to warp backwards in time to a few seconds before. Now he was on the ground, but the soldiers he had killed remained dead. He had found out that the wind-up key only send the user back in time. He could move through the time stream freely while remaining rooted in the present at the same time. He used this to shoot at the past iterations of the soldiers that were just standing there, frozen and oblivious. He didn't seem to do any damage, but some previous experimenting had taught Jack that any damage he did to these immobile past duplicates transferred onto the "current" versions of the Dersites.

To the Dersites, meanwhile, it seemed like Jack had just disappeared while they got a lot of plasma burns. "We can do that, too, you know!" one of them called out desperately as he groaned in pain. He tried reaching for his own wind-up key, but Jack "re-appeared" in the present and kicked the soldier down. He crushed his back with his foot, ripping out the wind-up key. The loss of blood from that ensured that the soldier would die a slow, painful death. Jack made sure to finish shooting at the other Dersites to guarantee that they would each remember his face before they all perished.

"Any of you monarchist punks got any last words before I go off to go kill your King?" Jack asked.

"Yeah," a Dersite said. "You're an idiot."

Jack found himself getting slash wounds from nowhere. He quickly travelled back in time and discovered the source: other Dersites who were trying to kill him. Jack simply went back in time farther to try and do him in, but he found that they had come from a spot he hadn't gone to. Since Jack had never been there in the past, he couldn't go there in the past. Because they weren't actually there in the past, he couldn't even go and kill them even if he could somehow get back to the past. So he took the direct approach; he went back to the present and flew away across the Battlefield. He eventually found the past trails of the Dersites causing him trouble and killed them on the spot before they could do the same to him.

Jack went back into the past again, an idea forming in his head. He got out his walkie-talkie and radioed HB. "HB: This is Jack. I'm coming to you from the future and I'm on the Battlefield. Where are you?"

"In the palace…with you. Jack, come listen! It's you in the future!" On the other end, Jack could hear his past self yelling at HB. Good thing he could always rely on his past selves.

"Go to the weapons factory and load up the missiles at the testing range."

"You mean the one we took over at the beginning of the coup?"

"No, I mean the one on Venus, you moron!"

"Where's Venus?"

"Never mind. I just need you to shoot some missiles at these coordinates: X37, Y429, Z negative 76. Got it?" HB obeyed, and Jack had to wait for a few minutes while HB fiddled around.

"There's nobody there, though. Why go over there and shoot an empty spot?"

"You're blowing up their past trails, you idiot! Just shoot where I say cuz' that's where the troops were! If you shoot where they were then they can't bother me in the present!"

"But I thought you said you were in the future."

"No, I meant your future, my present."

"The future is your present to me? Well, gee, thanks…I guess…" HB heard a cry of agony from the other end of the walkie-talkie, but he made his way over to the weapons factory to launch the missiles.

Jack went back into the present, ready to rub it into the Dersites' faces that they were doomed. But since he had arranged for their deaths in the present, there was no one around. They had all died minutes before in the new timeline Jack had made for himself, from the missile strike HB had launched.

"I got to remember to say something cool when I kill the King," he muttered to himself as he continued his search. "I can't forget like I did just then. Oh well, I can find their mangled body parts later and tell their corpses or something."

Suddenly, he heard a bellowing sound, and a huge figure appeared on the horizon. Jack loaded his plasma pistol and charged at the figure, obviously the Black King on closer inspection.

"If I had known you were attempting this," the Black King began. His voice boomed and echoed, only slightly muffled by Jack's fishbowl helmet. The Black King was, as he could see, too big and heavy to fly with his cape and instead resorted to running. In one hand he carried the scepter that gave him his power, and in the other an oversized gun that looked much more dangerous than some wimpy plasma pistol.

"What would you have done?" Jack pressed. "What could you have done, when there's a war going on? You'd get yourself killed by Prospitans that'd follow you back if you had tried to go back in time to stop me. And you wouldn't want to leave your present trail vulnerable, would you? Somebody'd ambush you if you did. That's why I was smart and killed your little goons before I tried anything timey-whimey."

The Black King snorted, raising a foot high over Jack to crush him. Jack quickly swerved out of the way and flew upwards to the King's head, shooting him in the eyes a few times. But this only had the effect of making the King go beserk as he was briefly blinded. He swatted Jack down and sent him plummeting to the ground.

"On the contrary," the Black King went on as he stood over Jack, "I have no wind-up key; I had mine removed. As a king, it is my duty to lead Derse by example. I fight with honor, not with cheap tricks."

"Your loss," Jack cackled as he lay sprawled on the ground. But the Black King reached down and plucked Jack's own wind-up key from his back. The pain was excruciating, and he cried louder than he ever had before, his ears nearly going deaf from the sound as the vibrations reverberated back and forth inside his helmet.

"Surely you jest," the Black King went on. "That thing was making it hard for me to balance myself. You try being a 50-foot-tall giant and wearing this getup without falling over!"

Jack crawled away, hoping to get to a safe spot quickly enough so that he could get to his feet and fly away. There was definitely a way to beat the Black King; he just didn't quite have the right resources yet.

The Black King reached down and picked up Jack, shaking him so hard that he lost grip of his plasma pistol. He squirmed desperately in the king's hand, but it was useless and he knew it.

"Fuck you!" Jack shrieked. "Fuck you for hurting me, fuck you for waging this war, fuck you for being such a piece-of-shit leader!"

"So many ways to kill a treasonous traitor like you," the king mused. "I know," he said with a wicked grin. Jack shook with fear as he saw the Black King reach for his plasma…cannon. That was the only way he could describe it.

"I'll have you burn! Die, Jack Noir!" the Black King cried. His voice was so loud Jack could swear he could see cracks on his helmet. A green light flashed…

And that was the last of Jack Noir.

. . . . .

And Meenah saw the whole thing.

She had arrived on the planet ahead of schedule; the Dersite ship had made a rushed landing in an dangerous part of the Battlefield near enemy lines once it was reported that a Dersite palace courtier in possession of the Queen's ring was killing a garrison of Dersite soldiers. Meenah had followed the Dersites to Jack, none of them questioning why she was there. She didn't have much beef with him besides the fact that he had stolen her ring, which apparently wasn't just flashy and decorative but also a powerful artifact. The soldiers with her had explained that it only worked on Carapacians, which was annoying but helpful. Meenah would have considered trying to kill Jack in a rage if she hadn't made a promise to herself not to kill unnecessarily, and if the Black King hadn't beaten her to it.

Jack lay dead on the Battlefield. He was prostrate and had a serious wound in his back. Also, his whole body looked as if it had been burned to death. The Black King stood over all of them, far larger than Meenah had imagined and far more intimidating.

"My King!" a Dersite soldier exclaimed when they approached him. "I take it this traitor has gotten what he deserved?"

"Indeed," the Black King replied. If whales could talk like trolls, Meenah thought, this is what they would sound like. "I'm still able to fight. He was hardly a challenge. I burned his body so that the Fiduspawn eggs inside of him would not be able to mature into clones."

"Fiduspawn? That weabro game?" Meenah said. "Water y'all talkin' boat?"

"You dare speak to a king with such…vernacular words?" the Black King asked sternly.

"Shell yeah. I'm an Empress, I outrank ya!" she insisted. The Black King, taken aback, dipped his head in respect.

"My apologies. I was not told that the Witch was an Empress in her old universe."

"Man, that's reel nice!" Meenah smiled. Maybe this whole "no unnecessary killing" thing could work out fine! Well, except for the fact that she had to kill him.

"Anyway, the Fiduspawn eggs one of your companions prototyped gave us all ovoviviparous eggs in our bodies," a Dersite soldier explained. "When we get killed, some clones take our place. Sometimes. It's weird to give birth when you die, especially since most of us here are males, but it certainly helps boost our troop capacity. They even come fully stocked with weapons!"

Meenah nodded, pretending to exactly what "ovoviviparous" meant. She dimly recalled the Black Queen having done something like this when she was trying to kill her. Speaking of which, maybe that wasn't a good idea to mention around these people.

"Hey, wait a minute! YOU KILLED OUR QUEEN!"

"Shut up, basshole!" Meenah protested, getting ready to abscond the shell out of here. But the King had already grabbed her.

"Is this true?" he asked, his eyes boring into her. Meenah was so afraid for her life that she sweated—so much so, it started looking a faded fuchsia color. If you're really nervous, your sweat can have some blood in it. It's real, look it up! It's even in the Bible! I'm serious!

"No. I didn't kill nobody." Meenah said, as bluntly as she could. "It was Jack. The buoy you just krilled. He was the one that gave the order."

She found herself sprawled out on the ground seconds later.

"I'll give you one minute to run away from here, as far away as possible," the Black King said. "The front lines are close by. Should you make it to the Prospitan-controlled zone, I'll spare you. I have no proof of your involvement, so it's only fair. Now…run, Witch."

Meenah did just that, and about a minute later there were no Carapacians at all in sight, Prospitan or Dersite. Perhaps the king had lied to her? Or maybe he had been judging her speed by how fast he could move, which was probably faster since he could take huge strides with his giant legs?

Moments later, she heard it: the thunderous sound of stomping feet. He was after her, and when she turned around she could see him getting closer, and closer, and closer…

She got out her 2X3dent and hurled it upwards at him. The blades wedged themselves into his shoulder, and he gave a grunt in pain. He pulled out the weapon easily, but he was clearly bleeding. Realizing he could lose a lot of blood chasing after her more, he lowered his plasma cannon and aimed at her. Meenah zigzagged as she ran, hoping to circle around back to him and avoid any shots from his plasma cannon. But Dersites flying through the air deterred her from that course of action. They flew in close and shot her with their plasma pistols as much as they could. Without a weapon and with no way to hit them, all she could do was dodge and hope to get away from the Dersites.

But it was no use. The Black King approached her and swung his scepter at her. She thought she could jump over or under it, but it was no use. Dodging enemy attacks just wasn't as easy in real life as it was in video games.

Wade…this IS a video game!

Meenah was about to ponder this last philosophical thought before her death when she heard another booming voice like the Black King's, but friendlier-sounding: "Oh, Georgeward! What do you mean by going and slaughtering civilians? Most unorthodox!"

It was the White King, and a group of Prospitan soldiers. Meenah could make out a figure in orange in the distance. Was it Aranea?

"Richanald! Don't interfere!" said the Black King, who apparently had the bizarre name of "Georgeward". "This girl has committed an act of murder in my country. She killed my wife!"

"And yet you won't give her a fair trial?" Richanald challenged. "My, my…I knew you Dersites were uncouth, but I didn't expect you to deny basic human rights to a foreigner!"

"This is a time of war, Richanald! If I don't rule with an iron hand, Derse will fall!"

"I highly doubt one lass could do such a thing, old bean."

"Don't you 'old bean' me!" Georgerward snarled. "Dersites, attack this blasphemer!" they did so, and the Prospitans responded by taking to the skies to meet them.

As the kings duked it out, Meenah took the opportunity to run away. The orange figure flew toward her, and she could see that it was Aranea. "Thank Neptune you bailed me out back there!" she cried, hugging her friend.

"I saw a vision from Skaia," Aranea explained. "I was on the Battlefield on my way to get home, so I figured I might as well take a look to see what would happen next. I saw you running from the Black King, and Jack…he's dead, isn't he?"

"Whale, yeah. What's wrong with that?"

"Weren't you working for him earlier or something?"

"How'd you know about that?"

"Prospit has good intelligence about the goings-on in Derse. Listen, the Black King is way too powerful, especially when you're going against him alone. So I was thinking…"

"Aw, shell yeah! A tag team battle!"

"No. I was thinking that we just…go back with the others and regroup. We can all fight the Black King once we have everyone on our side, or we defeat Lord English. He's an existential threat to the whole universe and not just our individual game session."

"Water you talkin' boat, Aray-ray? This Lord fellow is lower-ranked than me and ol' Kingy Georgie. He's probably just a red herring set up by the game to distract us from the reel target, the Black King!"

Aranea, to Meenah's surprise, groaned. "Why?" she asked her. "Why do you have to against the grain? Can't you just…listen to me for once instead of being so selfish? I'm the only one who ever bothered to stand up for you. I thought our friendship meant something to you. But ever since we've been in this game you've been doing things your own way. I took the time to learn how this game worked, and I was the one that insisted we play it, and you wanted to get out of Beforus forever so you were the first one to join me. But if I had known you'd come here and just wreck everything, well…I wouldn't have brought you here in the first place."

"Whale, at least I didn't sic Cronus on nobody," Meenah countered. "Least I didn't go 'round bargin' into other people's fin tides bein' all annoying and flotsam. I never messed with anybody that didn't deserve it, cept when it kelped me."

"Oh, please! Your bad deeds are as long as the list of fish puns you have stored somewhere. Meanwhile, I've been nothing but forgiving of your bizarre, anti-social behavior, and I've tried to convince the others that you weren't that bad. Why, Meenah? Why do you go on being so snortbeastheaded even in the face of, well, common sense? Common sense dictates that you listen to me and ignore that little voice in your head that says to kill the Black King. But nope! You'd rather go and get us all killed just so you can win the game! And then we'll get killed by Lord English because we never stopped him. So, yeah, thanks, Meenah! Some friend you are!" Aranea was about to fly away in a huff, but Meenah grabbed her leg.

"No." She pulled her down gently and turned her around. "You listen to me," she began, taking a deep breath.

"Well? I'm listening."

"I…I'm trying, Aranea. I thought about some of my…issues on my way to Derse. I was gonna krill the Black King, and then I was gonna…make it right somehow. I promised myself that I wouldn't krill anybody unless they got in my way or they were trying to kill me first. No more krilling for the halibut."

"Oh, please," Aranea scoffed. "The Meenah I know would never make a promise like that." She went away again, and Meenah knew she had to think of something to make her stay just a bit longer to hear her out.

"Whale, maybe…you don't know me very whale at all!"

"Water you—What do you mean?"

"I'm tired of this royal crap. That's why I wanted to join you. I wanted to make a new world. One where I wasn't some Empress that had to be shut away from everybody. One where you and I and the rest of them could all be fronds—equals. I wanted to make a place where I wouldn't be known as a crazy waterbitch who lives on the moon—a place where, even if it meant know more badbass days, I could be great in a different way. I could finally be…me."

Aranea paused for a moment before responding. "Wow, Meenah. That's pretty noble of you. You'd really give up your status and even your fighting prowess for a peaceful, gentler world?"

"You bet."

"Somehow, I believe you. I guess I've just known you for long enough. Well, I can be the first to tell you that that might not be happening."

"Huh?"

"Our session is screwed, Meenah. Literally and figuratively."

"Lemme guess, in 8 different waves?"

"Yes, Meenah—8 different waves, whatever the heck that means."

"It means—"

"I know, I was being facetious. Anyway, I was able to contact Clover for a bit."

"Who?"

"My exile. Did I not tell you about him?"

"What the shell is an exile?"

"I'll explain later. I'm surprised you don't have one."

"Oh, you mean the voice in your head? I don't have one of those."

"Yeah. Well, he said we were 'running out of luck'. Our supply is so low that he says we only have enough to just barely survive this session. He didn't give me many details, but…we're going to die, Meenah. Unless we can pull off a miracle or a find some way to get through this, we're screwed. Clover said there's a way to just end it all now, but he wouldn't go into details."

"You mean like shoot ourselves in the heads?"

"No, I mean end our session. But it would be pretty suicidal, actually. Clover called it 'The Scratch.' It resets our session and lets us start over again in a new one. Except it won't really be 'us'. It'll be trolls like us, but not quite us."

"Whale, what do we do?"

"You're asking me?"

"You're the leader, ain't ya?"

"Yeah, but you could get everybody to mobilize together. I'd need you to be my enforcer. Clover said there's a way for us to survive the Scratch, but more than likely we'll all die, all while creating a new universe that would just have to go through this same hell that we've been through."

"Shell? This ain't shell. It's more like purgatory. Doin' sick penance an' shit."

"Whatever. What I'm trying to say is…are you on board? Can I trust you?"

Meenah outstretched her hand and shook Aranea's.

"Count on it."

The two trolls continued to talk and plan on the Battlefield. Once everything was discussed, Aranea reached into her specibus and handed Meenah something.

"Consider this a gift," she said. "A forgiveness offering."

"A marshmallow? What the shell?"

"Don't eat it just yet! It's a magical marshmallow from Clover. You eat it, say 'Marshmallow power!' and then you'll have the power to travel through time. You might need that at some point for the Scratch. I saw a vision of myself giving it to you, so evidently I had some good reason for it."

"Yeah. Or maybe you were just being nice. 'Cept I have no clue why you'd choose a marshmallow as a way of saying 'Let's but some water under that bridge'!"

"I don't think I've ever heard the expression used that way before."

Aranea led Meenah to a Prospitan ship heading for LOFAS. Soon the session would end, with the trolls little wiser.