Theme 50 – Desire to Monopolize
Munich, 1925
The doors in their apartment are slamming open and shut, as Al sails from room to room, humming something happy and tuneless as he hunts for his other shoe. His hair is combed, he's got his best shirt on, and he actually bothered to iron his slacks.
Downstairs, curled in an armchair in the living room, Ed sinks a little lower into a blue funk. He doesn't have to wonder about the reason for all the festivities. He's already met her. She has big shy eyes and curly dark hair, and she is stealing his brother.
Footsteps clatter down the narrow stairs, and Al hops past him, pulling on his shoes as he goes. Ed catches a glimpse of the dreamy smile he wears. He sighs darkly and raises his book to block the view.
A moment later, fingers curl over the top of the book and tug it down, and he's confronted with his brother's quizzical face.
"What's wrong?" Al asks.
Ed makes a noncommittal sound and looks away, wishing he would let him go back to reading in peace. He doesn't want to spoil this for him, but…
Al's face tightens.
"Brother," he says, softly. "Don't do this. You always do this."
"Do what?" Ed asks, too cheerfully, trying to pull his book out of Al's grip. "I'm fine! Go have fun! If you want to put your neck in the noose and date a Jew, I don't see—"
The book is suddenly yanked out of his hands, and raps down sharply on the top of his head.
"Ow!" Ed yells, flinching back in more shock than pain. Al glares down at him, hands on his hips.
"Stop it!" he snaps. "You know that isn't why you're upset! Just because…"
He trails off, doesn't go so far as to say it, but his eyes soften and Ed sees the mixed sympathy and accusation there.
Just because you never really held her. Just because you still whisper her name in your sleep.
Just because you made a choice that, some days, you can't live with.
I am your brother, not your compensation, and not your companion into a lonely old age. I chose to be here for you, but I can't give up my chance at what you wouldn't let yourself have. You have no right to monopolize me, Brother.
Ed closes his eyes. He's right.
"Go ahead," he says, quietly. A smile curls his lips, and it's as real as he can make it. "Go have fun, okay? Tell her hi from me."
Al hands back his book, his smile returning slightly.
"Thanks, Brother," he murmurs, and bends down to press his cheek briefly against his. Ed doesn't open his eyes.
Footsteps cross the floor. The door clicks shut.
The book slips out of Ed's hand, thumping to the floorboards. He doesn't feel like reading anyway. That would require opening his eyes, and right now, memories are all he wants to see.
Ladies and gentlemen, this is it. We have officially hit the halfway mark. Thanks for sticking with me this long, and for all your reviews, tips, encouragement, love and support; and here's to hoping I get the next fifty posted in a somewhat more timely fashion...and to the possibility of genuine canon EdWin hitting us before I finish. 3
-Tobu
