Disclaimer: FFVII is owned by Square Enix. The author makes no profit and hopes that no court cases ensue.
Mon. 10-15. 14:48
SUB: Meeting at 5
Good evening Silver Elite members. Tonight we will be holding our tenth meeting at the Emerald Gleam in Sector 8. We will use continue our debate upon the identity of Sephiroth's partner at the Annual ShinRa Founder's Ball. Other subjects and information are always welcome of course.
Mon 10-15 15:02
RE: Meeting at 5
Because of an overflow of reservations, we will change the meeting point from the Emerald Gleam to Stonebrook Bar (still in Sector Eight at the same time).
Mon. 10-15 15:15
RE: Meeting at 5
There was an unfortunate flood in the Stonebrook so we are changing the meeting point to Limerick and Verse in Sector 6. Sorry for any inconvenience.
Mon. 10-15 16:30
RE: Meeting at 5
Our meeting has been canceled until further notice. I apologize once again for any inconvenience. Check soon for a re-schedule.
"I am writing you up for misuse of company funds."
"It was my own money, you can't do that."
"I am your boss. Yes I can. You used funds for Materia to bribe at least six bar owners to lie and state that they were closed."
"Notice how I put it back."
"Irrelevant. If you do it again I will put you back in charge of Turk training."
"Can I buy one of our laptops?"
"...Why?"
"Because I like fucking with these people and our laptops have all the fun surveillance shit on them."
"Your honesty is commendable."
"4000 gil for one computer. I'll even toss in the replacement for it."
"I believe that is called bribery."
"Yeah, so?"
"..."
"Come on Veld, it's all for petty revenge and soulless debauchery."
"...Fine, but don't let the trail lead back to us."
"Do you wanna help me?"
"Sorely tempting, but I am going to decline. Good luck fucking with fangirls."
"I don't need luck."
22:22 1-7-1984
EliteLeader: Good evening all. I will be leading discussion this evening. I have great news that member Gyllian4670 has found new information about a possible identity to our mysterious woman in green. Are you out there G?
Gyllian4670: Yes I am. I believe that her dress comes from a shop in Wall Market here in Midgar. Unfortunately his book keeping is atrocious so there is no physical name.
Masamaid: Can confirm. He remembers the size and the dress, but no name. Also a few dress shops on the plate have started re-creating the same style gown in different colors for those interested.
SullyMary: Nice. It is a very nice dress.
Masamaid: Agreed.
EliteLeader: Masa or G would you care to share any more details?
Masamaid: The mystery woman is in tall and in great shape. Size eight dress and well over five and a half feet. I put her around 5'11''
muthafuckajones: 5'10'' actually.
EliteLeader: I don't think I've seen you here before.
muthafuckajones: You haven't.
EliteLeader: Welcome to the discussion.
Gyllian4670: How do you know she's five ten.
muthafuckajones: Basic math.
Masamaid: ?
muthafuckajones: Posted in a forum two months back is Sephiroth's current height of 6'1''. The lady is nearly as tall as he is in her heels. Subtract the easily known added height of heels and you get 5'10''.
Masamaid: Nice.
muthafuckajones: Not really. I simply don't suffer from the same intellectual disability as the rest of you.
EliteLeader: That's wasn't necessary mother, we are all equals here.
muthafuckajones: It's motherfucker, and I am permitted my own opinion. And I can add and subtract. For the right price multiply and divide as well.
EliteLeader: Unless you have some new information to add I'm going to ask you to leave. You are being rude to other members and showing coarse language.
muthafuckajones: I quiver with fear.
Gyllian4670: Ignore the motherfucker.
Masamaid: Why come here to to cruel to your fellow members?
muthafucka jones: 1.) I am not a member of the Silver Elite (stupid name by the way). 2.) I am not the one frantically searching for the identity of a woman whom the person I hopelessly idolize took to a work function so I can make sure that he's still single. 3.) I came here to fuck with all of you.
Gyallian4670: That's a rather pathetic thing to do.
muthafuckajones: Says the individual who spent approximately a week tracking down the store that made one dress worn by aforementioned woman. That's a little sadder than taking four minutes of my life for some verbal target practice.
Gyllian4670: How did you know it took me a week?
muthafuckajones: Basic math again. Take the number of dress stores in Midgar, add in transportation time between each, add in the time of the average workday...about a week give or take.
EliteLeader: Please leave the discussion. I will not have you harassing members.
muthafuckajones: I'm not nearly as bad as the person who egged a girl who remotely resembled the "woman in green". Or the one who tracked down Sarah Adams and scared the shit out of her. She's six and is now further traumatized because she was assisted by Sephiroth during a routine mission. That was cruel.
EliteLeader: Apologies were issued to both parties. Something you have yet to do.
muthafuckajones: Call a fucking Waa-ambulance.
EliteLeader: Leave now.
muthafuckajones: Or what? This is a public forum. You can't kick me out.
17:56 1-10-1984
EliteLeader: Because of recent disturbances in past forums only Silver Elite members can participate in forum discussions. This policy will be enacted in the next ten minutes. Membership is currently free and easy to do.
Gyllian4670: Thank the gods.
Masamaid: Agreed.
HoneyLee: Stupid question. How do I join?
EliteLeader: Directions should have been posted outside of the forum link.
HoneyLee: Oh. Thank you! :)
CataurMe: So in ten minutes I'll just be kicked out of the convo?
EliteLeader: Yes, that should be how it works.
bitchface: I'm baaack!
EliteLeader: Unless you plan on joining us, you will have to leave. I have already placed a ban upon your IP address and your various usernames.
bitchface: I was running out of them any way and no I don't want to join. I don't like you.
Gyllian4670: the feeling is mutual bitch.
SullyMary: I have new information if anyone is interested.
Masamaid: Of course Mary.
Gyllian4670: Please. We need to celebrate our freedom from motherfucker bitch face.
bitchface: I'm not the idiot who does business on a public forum. Just remember that. I also haven't stalked any of you which would constitute as true revenge.
SullyMary: I know that Sephiroth is currently reading Fahrenheit 451.
HoneyLee: OOO. He has good taste.
CactaurMe: I didn't think of him liking scifi.
bitchface: re-reading. He's read it before.
SullyMary: How do you know that.
bitchface: I've seen him read it before. Duh.
HoneyLee: You're in close contact with him.
bitchface: If by close contact you mean I don't need a pair of binoculars to see him, then yeah.
EliteLeader: Are you telling us that you, the person who has been making snide and rude comments, actually know Sephiroth?
bitchface: Maybe.
Masamaid: Are you the woman in green?
bitchface: Maybe.
Masamaid: Do you know who she is?
bitchface: Yes.
Masamaid: Who?
(bitchface has left the conversation)
Gyllian4670: Goddammit.
Cass grinned at the message that informed her that she had to earn membership with the Silver Elite to join the forum again. She looked at the other window she had open. It confirmed her suspicions that a certain SullyMary was a Mary Sullivan who worked on the ground floor as a secretary.
This was too easy.
A/N: To be continued. Also, don't be a bitch online just because you can. Cass is in Momma Bear mode and that is not a valid excuse for all of you real people out there.
