It's the fiftieth chapter of Crash Bandicoot: The Dark Fate! Party time!
"Woooo!" Penta ran about, flailing his arms like a madman.
"Penta chill out, we could do without the insistent screaming."
"But this is a party, isn't it? More freedom to scream and do whatever we want!"
"Nobody ever screams at a party unless they're a lunatic...are you telling me you're a lunatic?"
"I'm no lunatic, I'm a rebel!"
"Makes sense..."
Dear Diary,
I have no intention regarding the monstrosities I have inadvertently created.
The monsters came out of nowhere, the time I was created. After I enrolled at Chantex's academy, they showed up at the educational institution, in ginormous numbers, and Chantex had no choice but to use the monsters for his and us students' bidding.
Chantex named the monsters Gloombreed - they were composed of dark matter and were always multiply, as if they were breeding - and each student was assigned particular species of Gloombreed based off of their element. The number of species are endless, too many to include in a bestiary.
I'm a little proud of the genius that I created without my own doing...it makes me feel as if I have a gigantic role in a wide-ranging conflict.
Sincerely,
Dave the Squirrel
Chapter 50: Matter of Time
The heroes' next destination was Sunside Glacier. Word has it that the final two Azalea clones were located there.
"Since this is the last of the clones, I have something I need to get off my chest..." said Fake Crash. "I think Azalea's very pretty..."
"Nothing wrong with that," remarked Crash. "Even though she might be evil and all, she's still attractive."
"Is she more attractive than Cynzia?" Uka asked jokingly.
"...I am not inclined to answer that question."
"Yo, yo, yo!" Innugati, the Eskimo who originated in Chapter 12, appeared waving his hands trying to get our heroes attention.
"Eskimos live here?" questioned Yaya.
"I have heard that mastodons also live in this area," replied Evelyn. "As far as I'm concerned, it's a lousy urban legend meant to deter people from entering the glacier."
"What up, dudes?" Innugati approached our heroes. "We gots a situation on our hands!"
"'We gots a situation'?" Von Clutch raised an eyebrow, confused by Innugati's lingo.
"The Eskimos here are supposed to be 'ratchet', apparently," explained Nina.
"Some mastodons went berserk in these parts and we need someone to calm 'em down!" explained Innugati. "You guys are just what us Eskimos need!"
Innugati guided the heroes to the mastodons den, which was quite huge I should say. But that should be expected with an animal species that should be extinct.
"Some ratchet girl is trying to mine these mastodons for their crystal tusks!" explained Innugati. "Ya gotta protect these mammals from the girl!"
"We can do that," said Crash.
"If y'all need any help, or if there is an emergency, just do an Apache war call!" Innugati left the heroes in the den as he departed. Fake Crash stuck his head up one of the mastodon's anuses.
"Fake Crash what are you doing?" Farrow grew concerned.
"These mastodons could be constipated," explained Fake Crash. "I'm just taking a look-see, that's all. Hello in there!"
The mastodon made an elephant noise and ran away, startling the other mastodons and causing them to run about. Crunch and Evelyn went to go round up these wolly beasts. Fake Crash's head was slightly covered in feces.
"A lot smellier than I thought..." he remarked.
"We have no time for fun and games," Tropy said sternly. "The clone might return here at any given minute, so we have to be on guard."
"Uka and I will scan the area," Aku said. The two masks rose up to the sky, and headlight beams came out of their eyes, as they surveyed the area.
"Huh, I never two they could do that," Crash watched as the two masks brothers did their thing.
"Uka does that to me whenever I'm sleepwalking," explained Cortex. "I always mistake him for a ghost, and once I hit him with a frying pan so hard, his face split in half!"
"A frying pan isn't able to do that," Yaya pointed out.
"...Then it must have been a boiling pan!"
"Boiling pans don't exist..."
Crunch and Evelyn rounded up all the mastodons, and returned them back to their original places.
"That was absolutely painless," Evelyn remarked.
"Yo dudes!" an Eskimo appeared. "We is being attacked! You's gotta help us!"
"Should we?" asked Farrow.
"They can handle it themselves," Pasadena shrugged. "A lot of Eskimos live here, they can form a militia of some sort, and..."
A poor Eskimo was sent flying in the air, flying across Aku and Uka.
"...dispatch the threat all by themselves. Guess I spoke too soon."
Ilmari was busy drinking out a water fountain at Chantex's academy. When he was done, he went on his merry way, until he bumped into Cynzia.
"Sorry, Cynzia, I didn't see you there," the boy apologized, before inspecting Cynzia's visage. "Something bothering you?"
"Oh, nothing, nothing's wrong, definitely not hiding anything..." Cynzia chuckled nervously.
"You sure about that? Tell me what's on your mind..."
"Nothing's on my mind, honest..."
"Either you tell me or I'll get Chantex to..."
"I DIAGNOSED CHANTEX AND COLLATOR WITH FREINZE'S DISEASE!"
Cynzia shouted this out loud before covering her mouth.
"But...but why?" Ilmari was at a loss of words, even though he technically said at least three words just now.
"I did it just so I could turn face...but I failed."
"Turn face? That only works in..." Apply wrestling terminology and... "...were you trying to switch over to the good side?"
Cynzia didn't answer, she just ran away, likely to break down in tears at any minute.
While Aku and Uka continued to do their thing, patrol the area of any evil threats, our heroes made it deeper into Sunside Glacier and saw Eskimos, bloodied and lying about.
"We the ratchets..." one Eskimo fist pumped in the air before his arm fell back on the ground as he passed out.
"Dudes, over here!" Innugati called out, waving a cloth in the air to grab our heroes attention. The group made their way towards him. "I gots a bad situation?"
"What situation could possibly be more serious than the one we're facing right now?" asked Tropy.
"My phone died, and now I can't videotape all this destruction and post it on Vine!"
Everyone gave Innugati blank looks. Posting a harrowing video clip on a social media app isn't the way to go, Innugati.
Suddenly an arrow was fired at the heroes direction, and they and Innugati jumped out of the way of the arrow. An Azalea clone dressed up like a warrior jumped down from her hiding spot - this clone was Mythical Azalea.
"Missed my targets..." she said. "Either that, or they saltated away at the nick of time!"
"Only a guy like Charles would use such vocabulary words," stated Crash. "Unless..."
"...Unless I am the pure embodiment of Charles - power, personality, and all!"
"Oh is that so? I was thinking that you isolated yourself from everyone and furiously studied a dictionary so you could build up on your vocabulary to impress others. But I'll buy that claim."
"It's not a claim, it's the indubitable truth! Azalea facsimiled the powers from her fellow classmates, and utilized the powers she congregated to create us clones!"
"Still not buying it. Gonna have to see it to believe it. Also, could you use simpler words? The readers don't want to have to use a thesaurus while reading this story."
Mythical Azalea gritted her teeth, and fired an arrow at Crash. The bandicoot did a Matrix style lean, and the arrow hit Innugati in his shoulder.
"Why me, fam, why me?" he pouted, nursing his injured shoulder. Mythical Azalea fired another arrow, and Evelyn fired the arrow back at the clone by manipulating the magnetic field, striking her in the chest. The clone took the arrow out of her chest, and began firing a flurry of arrows.
"Everyone hide!" Crash yelled as everyone hid in a hiding place. Mythical Azalea kept firing arrows...
...until a gigantic snowball was thrown at her, defeating her in the process. The snowball titans of Aku and Uka showed up.
"Surveillance got a little too boring for us, so we went to go check on you guys," Aku explained. "Glad we showed up at the right time!"
"I think I know the true identity of this Gunther fellow," Yerofeyev continued his conversation with Dave...do these guys ever go out? They seriously spend their days in the lair discussing evil and whatnot?!
"Enlighten me, master," Dave responded.
"When exactly did Detlef disappear?"
"Same time Tripp disappeared, when he lost that battle on Planet Exodus."
"And when did Gunther enroll at Chantex's academy?"
"Same time I enrolled..."
Dave's eyes widened with intrigue.
"Say no more, my dear apprentice. All will be resolved soon..."
Crash and company helped Innugati and the non-incapacitated Eskimos whip the surrounding areas in Sunside Glacier back to shape. Yaya took the time to nurse any Eskimos that were injured, Von Clutch worked to get the area cleaned, and Cortex...was just sitting on a log like a bum.
"Yay labor!" Cortex cheered, even though he wasn't doing anything.
"Would you like to do it for the Vine?" an Eskimo approached Cortex with a cell phone in hand.
"Not yet familiar about this Vine person, or what their significance is, but I'll give it a try!" the N head obliged.
"The final Azalea clone is still in Sunside Glacier," Farrow said to Crash. "I would assume she's snooping around the estate located here."
"We've been to the estate before, we're pretty tight with the guy owning it," stated Crash. "Might as well pay him a visit."
"Do it for the vine!" yelled the Eskimo recording Cortex on his cell phone.
"I ain't gonna do it!" Cortex retorted. This can't possibly end well.
"Do it for the vine!"
"I ain't gonna do it!"
"DO IT FOR THE VINE!"
"I AIN'T GONNA DO..." Cortex did a back flip, and stuck an imperfect landing. "...it."
Our heroes went to the Drexler estate to pay good ol' Drexler a visit. Crash knocked on the front door three times - first time to alert Drexler, second time just in case Drexler didn't hear the second knock, and the third time...we may never know why he did it a third time. The millionaire opened the door, and was delighted to see Crash again.
"So good to see you, old sport!" he gleamed. "Ah, I see you brought some friends of yours! Come on in, make yourselves at home!"
Crash and company entered the mansion, glad to be in the warmth and coziness of Drexler's home. If only they had brought some winter clothes with them...
"Care for a cup of tea?" Drexler offered Crash a cup of tea, which the bandicoot accepted. The others were salty about it.
"How come Crash gets tea, and we don't?" frowned Nina.
"Because Crash is the chosen one, and therefore he must be spoiled and indulged to death!"
"Yeah, what he said."
"Would you all like to see Elizabeth? I'm sure she's been dying to see some you again!"
Drexler took the heroes to Elizabeth's room...but Elizabeth wasn't there!
"Oh my goodness, Elizabeth's gone!" Drexler cried. "This can't be happening!"
"Maybe, she went shopping somewhere," Coco hypothesized.
"We must find her, and quickly! I can't afford to lose her, I'm nothing without her!"
"That's an understatement..." Pasadena murmured.
"You go search for my wife, I'll go check on my kids and make sure they're okay!" Drexler ran off.
"Dude is such a nervous wreck," Yaya shook her head. "Does anyone else think his wife went out somewhere?"
"Her purse is not in the room, so I would believe so," replied Von Clutch.
"My eldest daughter is missing!" Drexler shrieked. "Not my precious Wendy!"
"...Let's just snoop around and see if the last clone is really here," suggested Crash. Everyone else nodded in agreement.
So our heroes searched every little inch of Drexler's mansion, checking under every couch, chair, dresser, and bird cages. (A lot of pet birds in the mansion...Drexler must have a strong affinity for birds.)
"Still no sign of the clone," said Uka. "She must have found a very nifty hiding spot..."
"We better find the the clone and head back home as soon as possible!" frowned Crunch. "Crunch hungry! What about you, Fake Crash?"
Fake Crash didn't move - in fact, he was frozen in time. Crash checked out the doppelganger; his eyes weren't moving at all, nor were there any movements in his fingers and limbs. Crash knew exactly what to do...he pulled Fake Crash's pants down, revealing some pink briefs.
"Seriously Crash?" Nina crossed her arms.
"What, I've always wanted to do that!" Crash shrugged.
Then in an instant, Crash was frozen in time, his arms still in the shrugging position.
"This has to be the works of the Azalea clone," stated Farrow. "She's definitely in this area."
Now Farrow was frozen in time. Who's next?
"Every man for themselves!" Cortex ran away...only to get frozen in time. His Warpinator fell out of his pocket, and mashed a button as it fell on the floor, summoning Victor and Moritz.
"We're back in the story!" cheered Moritz. "This must be a new record!"
"Because the previous record was so great and awesome," Victor replied sarcastically.
The evil twins looked behind them, and saw the rest of our heroes frozen in time.
"I've heard of the five second pose, but this is outrageous..." remarked Victor.
"Silence!" a voice echoed. Moritz hugged his twin brother in fright, only for Victor to push him away. An Azalea clone - wearing a steampunk alchemist getup - dropped down from the ceiling, wielding a clock. This was Time Azalea.
"Ooh, look, a girl!" Moritz pointed at the clone, acting like he never saw a human girl aside from Nina. "Let's touch her!"
"Please don't..." grumbled Victor. "It's pretty obvious she's the one behind this whole time freezing thing. Why not give her the two-piece, and send her back where she came from?" Victor winded up his arm, ready to throw some vicious punches.
"Good thinking!" Moritz pulled out a two-piece bikini and gave it to the clone, while Victor faceplamed. Time Azalea took the two-piece, and ripped it into shreds.
"Die!" the clone summoned a clock, and once it struck twelve, it fired at beam at Moritz. The parrot flew out of the way, as the beam bounced off of a hallway mirror and returned back to Time Azalea, sending her back into a wall.
"Hey Victor, look at what I found!" Moritz pulled out a giant ray gun.
"Where do you get these things?!" questioned Victor.
"Santa Claus, perhaps?"
"Give me that!" Victor snatched the ray gun, and analyzed the buttons. "What does this button do..."
Victor pressed a button, and a giant plasma ball was fired out of the ray gun, and was heading straight for Time Azalea. The ball nailed her, defeating her in the process. Her clock was the only trace of her left behind.
"Yay, Victor, you saved the day!" cheered Moritz.
"With little to no help from you..." mumbled Victor. "Now where's that Warpinator thingy, it's time to go back to our princess reenactments...that we were watching online! Hopefully none of the readers caught that..."
Victor found the Warpinator, lying on the floor. He pressed a button, and he and Moritz were warped back to wherever they were. Elizabeth and her daughter, Wendy, entered the hall with shopping bags, and saw our heroes, still frozen in time.
"I thought I told Huey not to let Crash or any other guests inside the mansion when I'm not home..." Elizabeth shook her head. "And I told him I was going out shopping, too...that man never listens."
End of Chapter 50
The students gathered in the meeting room, for what could be the final meeting. Fourteen silhouettes were present, since Charles and Trent are being hospitalized, Dave is working for Yerofeyev, and Effam is technically dead.
"It is now time to look for the final mask, the Mask of Leadership," said Chantex. "Mount Hades is where it can be found. "Clyte and Ilmari have asked if they could partake in the mission. Who would like to join them?"
"Me," said Zeferino.
"Sign me up," Behrab raised his hand.
"I'd love to join," stated Xavier.
"Same here," Mildred spoke up.
"Eh, why not," Inez shrugged.
"This mission should be, like, painless," remarked Iseult, expressing her interest to join.
"Painless is far from it," said Chantex. "Mount Hades has the hottest temperatures in the island, so you all better be prepared.
"I'll have it all covered."
"Excellent...Meeting adjourned."
Thought this chapter could be slightly longer...but oh well.
