Chapter 43. Dylan Mulholland

Friday, late afternoon.

Since the boarding of that morning, lots of things happened. A steaming party escorted the cargo trader to Sydney, a medivac helicopter picked up Dylan and Pete from the Wollongong, but Mike and Kerry stayed on board in the ward room. The medic,Swan, had given her a sedative so that she slept the whole time and Mike didn't move away from her, neither did he say something. Kate tried a few times to get into conversation with him but he didn't say a word. He had looked at her and he had shrugged, nothing more. More and more she got frustrated. The more because Swan had examined Kerry's hand and told her that she was missing a pink finger. Kate had also tried to know from Mike what had happened, but he kept his mouth shut.

Meanwhile Kate had sent a message to Nikki about the situation. Nikki's answer was baffled.

Finally the Wollongong reached Sydney and they handed over the terrorists to the Feds and a ambulance had picked up Kerry and Mike. Nikki had managed an honour guard to welcome the Chief of Navy. With a wry smile and feeling uncomfortable in her DPNU she had inspected it. A staff car was offered to bring her to the hospital, but she had refused it bluntly because her own car was on the parking and she needed it afterwards also. After the ceremony she hurried back on board to finish the classic administration together with Andrew. Finally Kate had packed her luggage and left the Wollongong. She had picked her car and she had rushed to the hospital.

Now she was sitting at the chair next to the bed of Dylan in the intensive care room. The surgeon had told her that he had been lucky. The bullet has been removed but the first hours will be crucial. Kate was still in her DPNU and she leaned with her arms on her knees and had clenched her hands. She stared at the slow breathing of her husband.

I still can't catch it. Is this real? No, can't be. Within a sec I'm waking up from a bad dream.

What's going on? What have I done? I've shot my husband and my best friend. Maybe they are shot by these terrorists. You're fooling yourself Kate. They stood out of the firing line of the terrorists. It was you! Your own bloody stubbornness!

Mike and Kerry. What were they doing on board as well? What about the accident with her finger. I still don't know. Mike pulled up walls.

Why do I react so cool? All the people I love have been injured and you're just thinking about what and how!

At that moment there was a knock at the door and Kate lifted her head to see who was coming in.

Nikki. She was still in uniform and she looked like she went through a wringer. She walked to Kate and both women looked at each other.

"How is he?", Nikki asked.

"The surgery was good, but the first twenty four hours will be crucial", Kate replied so uninterested that Nikki scowled.

"What has happened?", she asked full of emotions.

Kate shrugged, "There was a gun fight on board in white fog of a smoke grenade. We were fired upon and I fired back", she replied coldly.

"Did they really fire upon you?", she replied shocked.

"You couldn't see a hand in front of your eyes", Kate replied without intonation.

"What were they doing there?", Nikki replied annoyed.

"I don't know."

"In one of the cabins we found Mike and Kerry", she continued plainly, but Nikki didn't recognise the mood of Kate.

"What's with Kerry?"

Kate shrugged. "Don't know. She seems to be mistreated", she replied dully.

"What were they doing there?", Nikki asked more irritated due to the reaction of Kate.

"I repeat, I … don't … know!", Kate replied also irritated.

Nikki lifted her eyebrows by the snappy answer.

"Kate, how can you be so cool? You'd better get some rest", she answered.

Kate narrowed her eyes and looked frustrated at her friend. "I know damn well what I have to do!", she snapped.

That was the last straw for Nikki. She got bright red. "Oh yes, you know what you have to do? Just like you knew how to shoot bullets in our husbands! Thank you very much. That it has to be exactly you to snap at me!", she snapped back.

"We'll talk further after you've cooled", she said and she turned and stepped fiercely to the door to leave.

Kate looked up startled by the reaction and realised that she has reacted wrong. She stood upright and followed Nikki to the corridor.

"Nikki! Wait!", she said out loud but Nikki had already stepped in the elevator and had pushed the button. Kate could only see how the doors closed in front of her nose…

"Oh! Damn you!", Kate yelled to the elevator's door and she turned to walk back inside.

She sat down with slumped shoulders and looked in a fool mood to the breathing of Dylan.

An instance later there was a knock at the door and Kate whipped her head into that direction.

It was the surgeon.

"Ma'am", he said, "With all respect, but I think it would be better that you leave the patient. You can't do much here now and he needs all the rest he can. Go home and take some rest as well. Tomorrow it will look better. We will take contact with you if there's any change in your husband's condition".

Kate sighed and nodded. "Yeah, probably you're right."

"Doctor, the bullets that you've removed, are they from our guns?", she asked trying to hide her panic.

"Ma'am, I'm a Navy surgeon, not a ballistic expert.", he replied. He grabbed in the pocket of his white jacket. "Now that you're talking about it. I have them here."

He handed the bullets to Kate who accepted them. She looked at them.

"Ours. I've seen their weapons. The hand guns were of a smaller calibre", she replied beaten.

"Ok doctor, thank you". Kate said again trying to recompose herself.

You can't get away with it! This is a nightmare.

What have I done?

She took her cap and threw a last hurtful look at Dylan and left.

At home.

When Kate opened the garage door she wondered how she got there. She couldn't remember the way she had driven from the hospital to home. She drove the car inside, got out and closed the door. Next she took out the sports bag and wanted to enter the corridor but she lingered.

Not with combat boots in the house!

Kate bent, untied the laces of her boots, pulled them out and let them there. She entered the living room and stopped in the middle. She sniffed the well known smell of their living room and looked around. Her eye fell immediately at the coffee table where his book and sailing magazine were lying.

She made a face and grabbed them.

"Dylan! How often I have already said…", she mumbled but she didn't continue. She looked forlornly at the book and the magazine and sighed. "I really hope that I can find them back soon again at our coffee table", she said faintly as she put them at the right place.

Kate walked further to their bedroom and dropped the sports bag.

"And now a bath, I really need it", she murmured.

She started to undress her with fierce movements and she threw the DPNU angrily on the ground.

"I really hope that I don't have to wear it again", she grumbled. She grabbed new underwear and walked to the bathroom.

Kate switched on the radio, has the spa-bath filled and dropped her used underwear in the laundry bin. Finally she stepped in the bath, sat down and closed her eyes to feel the whirling of the warm water.

I still can't catch it what happened today. Why? I've shot my own husband, I've almost destroyed my own happiness. What went wrong? I haven't seen something, but what? Why was I so cold against Nikki?

I've shot Pete too!

Why?

She sighed and the hot water did its work, relaxing her.

Dylan…

The surgeon said that the operation succeeded, but the first hours would be crucial. Continuing without him! My god, I may not think about this! No, no, he's a strong fella, he'll pull through.

No! He must pull through!

She smiled.

When did our friendship turn into a relation? Hmm, it went smoothly. No. There was a click. He has done something that pulled me over the line.

That was….

17 October 2019

The HMAS Newcastle

The frigate was slowly sailing to Nouméa in New Caledonia.

It was still morning and the arrival time was at noon. That meant shore leave for the majority of them. The day after they were still going to be in Nouméa and that meant shore leave again. The idea of having shore leave in such a holiday location made the crew extremely joyful.

I can feel the joy at the bridge, they are joking more than normal. That's good. A happy crew is the best that a captain can wish.

I just wished I could join their mood. I think that I'm probably the only sad person on board today.

I lifted the binoculars and peered to the grey-blue shade of the approaching coast line. I lowered my arms again and let the binoculars hang on my neck and sighed. Then I padded to my chair and sat down.

This is my little territory.

It should be a joyful day for me too, but it isn't. There was only one person who said 'happy birthday' to you today, and that was yourself, in the bathroom to your mirror image. Who else? You've kept the day of your birthday firmly for yourself. No, I'm lying, Nikki has sent me a text on my mobile from the Melbourne on which she's the XO. My XO? He ought to know it too, but I've barely seen Dutchy today. He has been running around the whole morning to prepare the ship to enter Nouméa because we must give a good impression to the French!

I'm in such a dual situation. You're a very private person, thus you haven't to complain, but on the other hand I want to share such a day with someone.

I've become 43 today and what did I achieve? I'm Commander and I'm commanding a frigate. That's good. It was your dream when you got your degree at ADFA. And further? Nothing! Not married, no relation, not even a boy friend and of course no kids. Dutchy, Dylan? Hmm, we're soul mates and I feel for him, but is that enough to start a relation? Moreover, we're on board, and that means I'm in the same bloody situation as with Mike.

Aargh!

Was it a good choice to ask for a transfer after the death of Jim? Don't doubt about that. I had no choice. I still feel awful when I think about that period. I really toyed with the feelings of Mike and Jim. I fooled them. All due to Maxine and Mike's hesitation. I was scared to tell the truth, afraid to hurt them. You waited too long and now you're sitting with a mountain high pile of guilt.

Stop it!

Look forward!

Yes, I do, but I can't shake these guilt feelings off of me.

From the corner of my eyes I saw the big sturdy blond man with Lieutenant-Commander shoulder boards arriving at the bridge. He walked to me.

"The ship is ready to enter harbour ma'am", he said.

"Good X, nice job", I replied and looked at him how he peered to the coast line that became already bigger.

Will he say something?

No, of course not. If he says that, than the entire ship knows within 5 minutes!

"You've been here before?", I asked him.

"Nope, never. You?", Dylan replied.

"Yep, once. It's really a holiday resort. We're lucky to be here now", I said.

"Hmm, I'm anxious to look around there", he replied.

"Will we go together?", I asked him.

"Yeah, a good idea", Dylan said enthusiastically.

Kate showed a slight smile.

Great!

That afternoon I was in my cabin.

The frigate was moored, the administration was done and the majority of the crew has already left. Now it was our turn.

I've pulled on a blouse with short sleeves, a skirt and a pair of pumps with a low heel. Maybe a bit boring, but as commanding officer I wanted to be classic. More fancy things hung at home in my wardrobe. I was looking forward to explore Nouméa with my friend. Tonight we could have a dinner in one of the restaurants of the city to celebrate my birthday.

I was just tying my hair in a ponytail as there was a knock at the door.

"Come in", I replied.

It was Dylan. He was wearing a jeans, a t-shirt and a loose hanging shirt. His sunglasses peaked out of shirt pocket. He looked as handsome as usual. Hmm.

"Ready?", he asked.

"Yeah!", I replied and I put on my sun glasses, grabbed my handbag and left the cabin.

The afternoon was great. We strolled through the streets of Nouméa and we looked at everything. He even tried to speak some French, but it didn't work properly. I couldn't explain but I felt happy with him and at ease. We walked next to each other and talked about everything. He calls me Kate without hesitation and that gives me also a good feeling. At a certain moment we were walking through a shopping street. I liked it, but I was slightly wondering if he liked that too. All of a sudden.

"Kate? Do you have a sec?", he asked me.

"Uh?", I mumbled and turned to see what he wanted to say.

I wasn't not a little bit surprised to see him in front of a front shop of shop with women clothes.

He pointed to a mannequin with a bright blue sun dress.

"Kate, I think that you must look pretty well in that one, don't you think?", he said.

I was baffled because I had never expected that from him. Moreover he had a good choice too, I liked the dress.

"Do you think that?", I asked.

"Of course, why don't you try it on?", he asked.

"Hmm", I hesitated.

Why? I still don't know.

"Yes, you can. Give it a try", he said ushering me gently into the shop.

A few minutes later I pulled open the curtain of the fitting-cubicle. "And?", I asked him.

He smiled at me, "Perfect match!", he said and he offered me a pair of blue heeled strappy sandals. "With these it will look even better."

I opened my mouth to say something, but I was baffled again. I accepted the shoes without protest and slipped my feet into them.

"Like this", I said showing to him.

"Hmm", he mumbled as he inspected me. "Turn", he said gesturing with his finger.

I did and I felt that he removed the elastic string from my ponytail.

He spread my hair over my shoulders and said, "This is the Kate I like".

I looked at my mirror image with him behind me and I had to agree that I was looking pretty well. He had right. I swallowed a lump in my throat because it really moved me. It was the first time that a man spoke like that about me. Mike had never chosen a dress for me and had never cared about me like that. That meant that Dylan must feel for me too.

"You're gonna take it?", he asked me.

"Hmm, maybe", I replied hesitatingly because it had ambushed me.

"Do it! My birthday present for you and take the shoes as well", he said with a smile.

"But Dylan!", I started to protest. More and more I was using his first name instead of his nick name.

"No buts Kate, just do it, you're looking really sweet in it", he said while grabbing his wallet to take out his credit card.

I think that I had my pet-name Sweetie since then.

As we walked out of the shop with the shopping bag in my hand, I looked around to verify if there was nobody of the crew around. Then I've put my hand in his neck, pulled him down and gave him a kiss on his mouth.

"Thank you Dylan, that was really a surprise", I said trying in vain to hide a blush.

That evening we've had a wonderful dinner in one of those local restaurants. I think that we both knew that we started to build our real relation from then on, although neither of us has said that to each other explicitly.

That came later…

Three months later.

The Newcastle was sailing to west in the middle of the Indian Ocean. I waited until my XO came to me.

"X, we'll bring a courtesy visit to Réunion. We'll stay there a couple of days. You know, the classic stuff, a few official visits and the most important of all, shore leave", I said to him.

"Hmm, we're visiting all the French overseas areas. We're more a cruise ship than a missile frigate", he said with a smirk.

"If you don't like that, I can always turn back to Australia you know", I teased him.

"Well, in that case you're not going to be very popular with the crew", he grinned back.

I replied with a smirk.

"Maybe we can take a day off as well?", he whispered.

My heart went a few beats faster. "Yeah, why not. I'll fix something", I replied.

Nothing spectaculars has happened since my birthday at Nouméa. We've had a few drinks, dinners and lunches together in pubs and restaurants, nothing more. Although, we've had more little physical contact like little pokes from my side to him or his hand brushing my shoulder. This shore leave was going to be an activity that we were going to do together.

We were moored in St Denis and we had handled the official parts and now it was our turn. Within two days we had to leave, thus that meant one night on shore. Dylan had whispered to me today that he already knew where we were going to. It was already afternoon and I didn't want to loose time, so I hurried to my cabin. I really didn't know what we were going to do, so I pulled on a colourful t-shirt and a three-quarter pants and I packed the famous blue dress and shoes for the evening. This time I didn't tie my hair. To avoid suspicious looks we were going to leave the ship separately and meet by accident at the quay.

When I left the gangplank I saw Dylan already in the distance.

"Hi Kate, you're looking good. Ready to go?", he greeted me when I reached him.

"Thank you and I've got everything", I replied with a smile.

"Nice, I found out that there are taxi's. They can bring us to Boucan-Canot beach. Following the documentation it ought to be nice and popular", he said as we walked both to the taxi.

After a wild ride with the local taxi we arrived at that part of the island and I was immediately pleased by the holidays atmosphere there.

He touched my arm and pointed to an hotel, "Let's look for rooms there, then we can leave our luggage".

"Yeah, why not", I replied and we started to walk to the hotel.

We entered and we walked to the reception desk.

"Madame, Monsieur?", the receptionist greeted us.

"Do you have two single rooms for one night?", Dylan asked him.

He shook his head, "Excusez-moi monsieur, but we're almost fully booked. I have only one double room left", he said.

"Uh?", Dylan mumbled and he gave me a questioning glance.

I shrugged, "we're no children anymore".

I couldn't help it, but my heart jumped almost out of my chest.

"Ok", he said and turned to the receptionist again, "that's ok for us".

A bit later we entered our room that looked out over the sea. It was not that big but it was fair enough for both of us. We put down our bags and chuckled to each other just like teenagers when we saw that the double bed wasn't too big either. I looked at my watch and looked at him.

"Dylan, it's already too late to make a big exploration of the neighbourhood and maybe we can stroll around here?"

He nodded as he walked to the terrace door to open it. "That's ok for me", he said.

"If you don't mind, I'm going to put on something more appropriate for here", I replied.

"Fine", he said as he sat down at the terrace.

I opened my bag, grabbed the things I needed and disappeared in the bathroom to change. A few minutes later I walked and he noticed the blue dress and shoes he bought for me for my birthday. "What do you think?", I asked.

He stood upright and walked to me. "Wow, you're beautiful. You're a real sweetie", he said with a radiant smile.

He stood in front of me and I could feel his hesitation if he would hug or kiss me or doing nothing. Probably with lots of efforts he decided to do nothing. For sure he was afraid to spoil the mood. If he would have known that I longed so much for a hug!

We strolled along the boulevard adjacent to the beach and enjoyed the sun at a terrace. After our dinner we made another stroll over the boulevard and we stopped to look at the reflection of the moon in the sea. He stood just behind me and I felt his chest with my back. I leaned slightly to him and as response he had put his hands on my hips. Now I leaned a bit more to him and I felt how he put a kiss on my head. Feeling that I turned and wrapped my arms around his neck and we looked at each other.

"Kate", he said simply after a few instances, "I love you".

"I love you too", I replied and realised all of a sudden that Mike never has said that to me.

Slowly we moved our heads to each other to give each other a passionate kiss, and another one and another one.

"You're a sweetie, did you know that?", he asked me.

"You're too kind", I murmured.

He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and I did the same around his waist and strolled back to the hotel. Once in our room we embraced each other and we started kissing again. With my toe I fiddled the strap of my sandals down to kick them away. I started to untie the buttons of his shirt and he helped me out of my dress. An instance later we experienced probably the most passionate night of our life…

The next morning we woke up by the sun on our faces. I curled up against him. For a while we lay next to each other while he was caressing my body. We enjoyed each other and it looked like we wanted to hold the time.

"Kate?", he said softly.

"Hmm".

"I want to move on with you", he said.

All of a sudden I felt happy and sad at the same time.

"Me too big fella, but how are we gonna do that? The same ship?", I replied huskily.

Now that I was at the point to start a new relation I realised that it would be the same situation as with Mike. Due to the fraternisation rules, our hands were going to be tied.

"It's going to be the same as with Mike!", I said in panic fighting back tears.

"No worries. There are some common points, but there are also different ones. You're now the CO and I the XO. And nobody is going me to spell a lesson like they did to you. Mike has never made a commitment to you, but I do. I don't know what your opinion is going to be, but I like to be with you, at sea and on shore…", he said, but I cut him off.

"Steve Marshall has done so many efforts to bring me where I am now and if I would ask for a shore posting, I'm going to disappoint him, for sure!", I replied sadly.

"If one of us is on shore, then it takes a couple of months before we could be together again. A frigate isn't a patrol boat", he said.

I realised all of a sudden what he had said, it would take a couple of months! I realised myself something else too.

My goal has changed since the disaster with Mike and Jim. Back then I wanted to marry, to start a family with kids. Now I'm 43 and in my current function and with my age it's absurd to think about kids although it still hurts. Now I'm looking for a steady relation. Someone who's waiting for me, someone to who I can long, someone to feel at home with. This is it Kate! The knight on the white horse is here now, in the skin of your XO and your friend. He has spoken the magic words to you. Don't have him slip away!

"You're right. I want to be with you too", I murmured.

"Me too. Listen Sweetie, being together is the most important for me, not where and how, but being together. And on shore we are ourselves, not CO and XO, but Kate and Dylan", he said while giving me a hug.

I thought about what he said and grimaced. "You're right, but sooner or later they'll notice and then one of us has to leave the ship", I said.

"At that moment we will both apply for a shore posting and then the problem is no more", he said.

As answer I lifted my body and turned to him to kiss him.

When we walked on board late that afternoon, the crew looked amused at my blue dress; they had never seen me like that before, but I really couldn't care anymore. A new episode of my life had begun!

To be continued