Oh my god, a second chapter within a thirty day period! :) I hope you enjoy it cause it may be a little while until the next one.
Chapter 50
Opie felt like someone had reached for his heart and ripped it from his chest. There they were, his only remaining family and blood, fifty feet away walking into school without the slightest indication he was there. His vision became blurry and tears fell the moment he blinked. He'd never felt so disgusting, so broken, not even when he was lying in the hospital bed bleeding and dying.
He wanted to get out of the car and run after them. He wanted to lift them into his arms, squeeze them so tight it hurt and never let go. He wanted to tell them he'd never leave them again. But he couldn't move. His body wouldn't let him move.
Opie shook, his entire body trembling as he struggled to catch his breath. He gripped the steering wheel so tight in his hands his knuckles turned white. As Kenny and Ellie walked into the large front doors of the school and disappeared along with the other students, Lyla driving off without a glance in his direction, Opie lost control.
He roared loudly, releasing his frustration, his anger and resentment. He held the steering wheel firmly and started to shake it, rocking it back and forth with all his strength. He cried out loudly again, still shaking the wheel until he heard something in it crack. Without warning, he reared back and threw his fist into the dashboard, forcing it to splinter underneath his strength.
The broken young man breathed deeply, still shaking, tears still streaming down his face. What had he done? What stupid snap decision did he make that meant he'd never see them again? Was it worth it? Was all the pain and anger he felt worth it? He'd never get to hold them again. He'd never get to tell them how much he loved them. He'd never get to see them grow up, walk Ellie down the isle, see them graduate high school or see his grandkids. He'd never get to have a life with his children.
Opie yelled again and plunged his fist into the radio. It broke and splintered like the dash, but this time the plastic cut into his skin. He felt the warm blood pour from the fresh injury immediately and saw the crimson when he pulled his fist from the hallow shell. It barely registered. The wounds throbbed around the pieces stuck in his skin, but the pain wasn't there. If it was, it was nothing compared to how the rest of him felt.
The cell phone in his lap vibrated again. Opie looked down and realized Alex had text him again.
"You there?" it read.
Opie took one deep breath after another trying to calm himself before replying.
"Yeah." He wrote. "I'm fine with anything. Whatever you want to eat."
And he sent it. Opie snapped his phone shut, plopped it back into his lap and turned the car on. Without a glance back to the school, the broken man made his way to Alex's house to hide again in the abandoned property. Maybe he'd clean his fist.
Alex stopped by some local fast food joint and grabbed something that would tie them over for a little while, drinks and all. She even went to the gas station and got a few drinks and the basics just in case, including beer. What she didn't get, were medical supplies.
By the time she made it home and into the house, Opie had been home for about twenty minutes. He was sitting in the backyard, his hand in the pool. Alex eyed him curiously. She had a cold beer for him in her hand along with the food when she approached. Opie saw her and groaned to himself at the inevitable fight. Slowly, he pulled his now swollen and purpling fist out of the cold water.
"Jesus Christ." Alex snapped in horror at the injury. She nearly dropped the food, instead shoving it all onto the picnic table and ignoring the sound of his beer toppling over as she rushed to his side and took his hand. "The hell did you do?"
"Nothing." He mumbled.
Alex looked up at him and noticed his face for the first time. He was still flush from crying because he'd ever really stopped. Alex gently touched his cheek and felt the fire from it. Opie's brows pooled in the center of his forehead and his eyes glassed again.
"I'll never see them again."
The words were breaths with sound at best, so weak compared to normal speech. Alex felt her heart drop. She knew immediately he meant his kids and while she silently hoped he hadn't been stupid enough to go see them, something told her he might have. Seeing the anguish in his features superseded the anger she felt at him for leaving.
"Come here." She whispered, reaching up and cradling his head to her shoulder.
Opie gripped her tightly and began to shake again. It felt like his dad had died all over again. He had the same empty feeling coursing through him. So Alex held him. She laced her fingers through his hair, felt her stomach lurch at the feel of his stitches and just held him.
They stood there for a while, Alex trying to console the man who didn't really have anything left in the world, before she brought him to the picnic table. She presented him with his food, but part of her knew he might not eat it. Instead he opened the beer, held it out while it overflowed and finally took a long drink. They didn't speak for a while after that either, not until Alex finally decided she had something to say.
"Ope," she said softly. He barely looked to her out of the corner of his eye. "Sweetie, where'd you go?"
He didn't answer. Instead he continued poking at his food and took another long drink of his beer, finishing it off easily. Alex's brows pulled together.
"Opie,"
He flinched and glanced to his knuckles.
"The school." He told her.
Alex groaned to herself, putting her face in her hand. She wanted to yell. She wanted to tell him he was an idiot. She wanted to go on and on until she was red in the face, but to what point and purpose? He'd already done it, so what good was it going to be to bitch him out because of it?
"Did… did anyone see you?" she asked, rolling her head towards him.
Opie shook his head, still staring at his hand. He moved his fingers briefly to tell whether or not he'd broken his knuckles. He still wasn't entirely sure. Too swollen to tell and too bloody. She sighed and turned on the bench. Grabbing her drink, she fished out some ice, took a napkin and made a makeshift icepack.
"Here." She said softly, motioning for Opie's hand.
He gave it to her without word, staring off into nothingness as she pressed the cold, dampening napkin to his skin. Opie flinched, but did little else.
She dabbed his skin, removed some of the blood, but kept the ice there as long as she could to minimize the swelling.
"I saw the guys today," she said after a minute or two. Opie turned just enough to look at her while she kept her eyes on his hand. "At the hospital."
"And?" he asked.
"They're good. They look the same." She replied. "Abel's doing good too. They're keeping him for a couple days just to be sure, but he's stable."
Opie nodded, but didn't speak. He was happy the boy was safe and sound, but part of him hated it too. It wasn't that he wished Abel harm, far from it, it was that he resented the fact Jax still had his family. He had his wife, his sons and his life. Opie was starting to realize that he may be alive, but he didn't really have a life. Not anymore.
Hours had passed and while Alex wanted to go home, to drive back to San Francisco, she didn't. She knew Jax wanted to see Opie and maybe vice versa and she wasn't sure she wanted to leave just yet until she was sure everyone was safe. Leaving with uncertainty would just drive her insane in the long run.
While she was out one of the things Alex had grabbed at the gas station were lanterns. They were small and battery powered, but they served their purpose. They gave off just enough light when the sun set. She seemed to know even then that she was going to be staying at least overnight.
She'd text Jax at some point during the day, telling him they were at home if he wanted to come by. He said he had errands to run, but he'd try. She knew he would, no matter how tired he was, because Opie was his brother and the last images he had were of Opie being beaten and lying in a coffin. She knew Jax would show up at some point for new memories.
Alex and Opie sat at the edge of the pool. She'd rolled up her pants and stuck her feet in while Opie contemplated just jumping in and sinking to the bottom. It wasn't that he wanted to die exactly; it was that he wanted to be under the water and drown out the noises in his head. He still hurt from seeing his kids.
But he sat beside her in silence. Alex did what she could to comfort him, leaning back just enough he could rest his giant head in her lap while he laid at the water's edge. She swayed her feet lazily in the water while running her fingers through his hair, avoiding the stitches left behind and the bruises. She just stared down at the man staring at nothing. He broke her heart.
It was nearly eleven o'clock when they heard a bike in the distance. Both tensed. It wasn't uncommon to hear in Charming, the sound of a Harley, but there was always the chance. Sure enough, the bike grew louder the closer it came until they could swear it was right in front of the house before the engine was cut. Still, neither knew exactly who it belonged to.
Alex had told Jax and only Jax that she was in the backyard. If they knocked on the door, that meant someone else had come over to say hello or whatever and Opie was going to have to stay hidden in the dark or risk being discovered.
Minutes seemed to tick by as they waited. It could have just as easily been seconds, but it felt like so much longer. The gate clinked and a few seconds later, Jax emerged around the corner of the house. Alex smiled while Jax looked frozen somewhere in between shock and trying to remove his riding gloves.
The moon was nearly full so it helped illuminate the backyard along with the few lanterns Alex had bought and set up. It gave the two more than enough light to see and recognize one another.
Opie spotted the shocked blond struggling to breathe and walk at the same time. Opie pushed himself up and gradually stepped around the pool towards Jax. Jax stood still for a moment, unable to believe what he was seeing. His eyes turned teary almost immediately and as much as he wanted to hug Opie, he wasn't going to make the first move. Part of him didn't feel like he had the right to. Part of him knew how much Opie had to give up in the first place.
"Ope," he sighed with the same relief as he had over the phone.
Opie didn't speak for a moment. He was conflicted as he stepped closer to his one time friend. On the one hand, after seeing Ellie and Kenny at school and realizing he'd never be able to see them again because of what he'd done for the Club made him hate Jax. He hated everything the blond could have and he couldn't. On the other hand, Jax was his brother, his life long friend and the only other person in the world he cared about that knew he was alive.
Without warning, Opie closed the distance and wrapped his arms around Jax. The blond breathe easier the moment he had and hugged his friend so tightly it hurt them both. Their eyes began to glass over from the contact, each holding the other like they would suddenly disappear.
"I've missed you bro." Jax breathed.
"Me too." Opie said gruffly.
They squeezed each other one final time before parting. Jax clapped his hand gently against Opie's cheek and smiled wide.
"It's good to see you man. Shit," he sighed.
Opie forced a smile as best he could and simply nodded.
"So what's been going on since I died?" Opie asked.
Jax took a deep breath and sighed. He had nothing to hide from his brother now, and he wasn't going to try.
