Disclaimer - I don't own Twilight or the characters, only the plot and Wilson.

Hugs go out to Keye and Rita01TX who cheer me on and work hard to stop my English from showing. Special mention to Bevey99 and EeWee (who is really needing our positive vibes at the moment) for asking me to fic them a motorcycleward.

Well, if you're reading this you survived me pulling the tripple cliffie and you've come back for the Kermit/Alice reunion. Hope you enjoy it...

Chapter 54

The place still smelled the same…a gut wrenching miasma of unwashed bodies, stale air, cigarettes and bleach. My stomach lurched and I coughed to disguise the visceral reaction. Give me a week and I wouldn't notice those rank odors anymore.

"Just couldn't keep your nose clean, huh?" Jenks smirked as we walked past. Still the same smug prick I remembered.

"Missing the food, sir," I retorted calmly, eyes forward, not breaking my stride. It surprised me how quickly and easily I was slipping back into my old prison persona. He shook his head and chuckled.

"This one's yours, Cullen," the guard said, motioning with one finger to the open door on my left before hollering, "Hey, Cameron. You got company."

Well, fuck. I suppose it was too much to hope I'd be placed with Emmett again. The first time I'd been shown to a cell, I'd had the urge to say thank you to the screw. This time, I just wanted to find my bunk and get settled in. It was a weird, deja vu kind of thing. The place felt so familiar, even if it wasn't in a good way.

A pair of boots poked out from the end of the top bunk. They didn't look particularly big or intimidating but, even so, I couldn't be bothered introducing myself. Instead, I got busy arranging my stuff…a couple of photos of Ella and my family tucked under the pillow and some spare clothes stacked at the foot of the bed.

Mom had brought these few necessities when she'd arrived with Ella and Rose for their final visit with me at the Forks police station. It had been an awkward few minutes and my Ella had looked like she'd been crying for hours. With the damn bars in the way, I was unable to hold her like I wanted and needed. In the end, I did manage to whisper how I'd miss her every moment we were apart and she promised she'd wait for me. Speaking of promises, I made Rose swear she'd keep up her weekly visits with Jane, her counselor, and Mom vowed to keep on Lahote's case until my name was cleared.

All the time I shuffled around my new cell, the guy above me stayed silent. Cameron? The name meant nothing to me. I'd only been away a few weeks so either he was a newbie or a transfer in. Whichever the case, I couldn't get overly excited about it…I wasn't here to make new friends. Besides, he was probably trying to intimidate me with the silent treatment. Dumb shit had no idea how detached I could be.

I rubbed a hand over my eyes. The journey from the cells at Forks in the back of the grubby prison van had left me feeling grimy so I dug out the standard issue bar of soap and headed over to the sink.

"Did I give you permission to use the sink, bitch?" a voice rumbled from high behind me and I raised my eyes to the heavens.

Sometimes prison life was so predictable. Cameron thought he was top dog and now he was going to try and piss all over me, putting me in my place from the get go.

"You talking to me?" I replied, channeling my best De Niro as I spun the wet soap around and around in my hands watching the thin lather form. I didn't bother to look at him since I knew he was still on his bunk.

"Ain't no one here but you and me, bitch," he sneered.

Calmly rinsing off my hands, I reached for the towel. Even if I let my ego take over, maybe ask him if he had any idea who he was dealing with, there was no guarantee my name would mean a thing to him. Besides, this shitty attitude of his needed to be nipped in the bud once and for all.

"Let's get one thing straight, butt fuck...I'm no one's bitch," I stated firmly, keeping my back to him until I heard the telltale squeak of bed springs as he rolled off his bunk before tearing down the ladder intent on teaching me some manners.

He never got the chance.

"Fucking bastard..." were the last words out of his mouth before I spun around and punched him square in the face. Hard. There was a split second when his eyes widened in surprise and his expression relaxed. Then he staggered back a step and dropped to the floor like a sack of cement.

Hissing, I shook out my fist and ran it under the cold water. Damn, I didn't remember it stinging this much the last time I knocked someone out. I was definitely getting soft in my old age.

"Well, look what the cat dragged in."

Instantly recognizing the rich baritone of Emmett's voice, I grinned.

"Hey! A welcoming committee?" I joked, turning around and striding over Cameron's prone body to envelop him a tight bro hug, slapping him on the shoulder with my still throbbing fist.

"Well, it sure don't look like jerk-off here's doing a very good job of it," he chuckled, not turning a hair at the sight of the unconscious man at my feet. "He's a total pain in the ass but I see I trained you well, young Skywalker."

"Fuck off," I laughed, the last of the tension finally leaving my system. After so much shit going down, it was good to see a friendly face again and even better that we could fall straight back into the comfortable dynamic we used to have.

"So, what'd he do to deserve that?" he asked with a serious expression, "Wait a minute…he didn't call you Alice, did he?"

"Oh, much worse. He said I was his bitch," I responded, lifting one brow in anticipation of his reaction.

"What? That bastard stole my line?" he laughed, shaking his head. "Guess we need to teach the prick a lesson."

He was already dragging Cameron's unresponsive body over to the chair, plonking him down and checking he wasn't going to be coming around anytime soon by pulling his eyelids open with his thumb.

"Speaking of lessons, I owe you a punch in the mouth, too," I snorted, leaning against the bed frame and crossing my arms.

"What the fuck you talking about?" he asked, his features drawn in bafflement. "We all know by the time you're big enough to hit me, you'll be way too old."

"Oh, nothing much; just the small matter of your name being written across my ass...in permanent ink."

There was a beat of silence before he roared with laughter.

"Shit, man, and it's only taken what, five or six years for you to work that one out?"

I wanted to be mad but seeing him so happy was infectious and I ended up grinning, too.

"So, how'd you find out, princess? Been checking your fine ass out in some three hundred sixty degree mirror?" he snickered between fits of giggles, wiggling his ass as if performing some lame assed salsa dance.

"No. Actually, my girlfriend called me out on it," I smirked. Then my smile quickly faded.

God knew how long it would be before I'd get to see Ella again or hear her soft voice murmuring words of love in my ear as I hold her warm body in my arms. I stared down at the grey linoleum tiles beneath my feet forcing myself to remember her sweet face. The last time I was inside, I'd been a virgin with no idea what I was missing. This time, I was going to be like the majority of guys in here…sexually frustrated and damned pissed about it.

I pushed it away. As it was, I was going to have to work through the remainder of my sentence and, if those arson charges stuck, I could be rotting in here for more years than I cared to contemplate. Even though I was innocent, there was no guarantee Lahote would be able to clear my name so closing off my emotions was crucial if I was going to survive.

"So, what'd you do to land yourself back in here?" Emmett asked. "Hang on, don't tell me...Kermit missed his Alice so much he had to break his parole to get back inside."

"Someone planted a gun in my bike's saddlebag," I sighed.

"Fuuuuck, man," he drawled, "You think it's the same bastard who trashed the bike?"

"Probably," I said, finally looking up. I'd been so wrapped up in thoughts of Ella and my stalker, I hadn't even noticed Em starting to strip Cameron's out of his jumpsuit.

"What the hell are you doing?" I asked uncertainly. I'd trust Emmett with my life but this looked fifty shades of wrong to me. He grinned.

"I told you already. This weasel's been throwing his weight around since he got here and someone needs to teach him who's boss. Give me a hand with his feet, will ya?"

Surprised by how light the guy was, I supported Cameron's upper body while Emmett tied his jumpsuit around the support post of the top bunk. Finally, we hoisted him upside down and secured his ankles with the legs and arms of the suit. He looked kinda like a huge fish caught on a giant's fishing pole by the time we'd made sure the bindings weren't going to come loose. Emmett squeezed his mouth open and positioned his head so his tongue dangled out, probably so he wouldn't accidentally swallow it, which I thought was considerate.

"Come on, let's go see what's on TV," he suggested calmly. "I wanna hear what's been happening these last few weeks."

"What? We're just gonna leave him here?" I wondered, raising one brow.

"Well, it ain't like he's going anywhere," he chuckled, rubbing a hand over his crew cut, "Besides, if he wakes up like this, he'll think you got superhuman strength or something. He'll be too scared to retaliate...hey, it's a shame we couldn't make an I'm Eddie's bitch sign to hang around his neck..."

His eyes began to roam around the room looking for something suitable to use to make a sign and I laughed, patting his shoulder before he could get me into more trouble.

"Come on, Alice. I've got a shit load of stuff to fill you in on."

The TV room was half empty so we had no problem finding two chairs close enough together to talk without disturbing the few inmates who were actually there to watch something.

"So, what was the story with the gun?" Emmett asked, his face serious. "Sounds like someone was desperate to get rid of you."

"Tell me something I don't know," I groaned. "First the bike was trashed, then I got a couple of threatening letters, the garage where I worked was torched and, of course, the cops decided I was their prime suspect."

"Holy shit! Arson?"

"Yeah, the investigators are looking into it but I think it was deliberate." I fell silent for a moment, considering the implications of another trial. "Anyway, they arrested me and, when they searched my house and the bike…surprise, surprise…they found the gun. Instant parole violation. Go straight to Jail, do not pass Go, do not collect two hundred dollars."

Bracing my arms behind my head, I sighed heavily and leaned back in the chair.

"Yo! Cullen!" One of the older, grizzled inmates recognized me and came across to give me a high five. "Couldn't stay away, huh, son?"

"Good to see you, Joe. How's it hanging?" I replied as I slapped his palm and watched him shuffle away.

"So, who do you think it was?"

That was the sixty-four thousand dollar question. I shook my head and shrugged.

"It could be anyone connected to the guy I beat up, Ella's lecherous boss, the Chief of Police or even someone I hadn't thought of with some kind of grudge against me. Either way, it doesn't really matter. I'm still stuck in here until the end of my sentence because of them."

"That blows, man," he said. "So, what's she like? Your girl, I mean."

"Ella?" I felt the corners of my mouth lift as I pictured her in my mind's eye. "She's petite, brunette, beautiful face, killer body and...unfortunately for me, the Chief of Police's daughter."

"The same one you think could be behind this shit?" He raised his eyebrows. "That sounds like trouble."

"Yeah, I'm not exactly ideal boyfriend material in his eyes. Plus, he denies ever seeing those letters I took for him to investigate. The bastard was just glad to get me out of the way, I think. He probably did a happy dance when that gun was found."

"Unless he already knew it was there," Emmett muttered, only it sounded more like a question.

I'd be lying if I said the thought hadn't crossed my mind. Lahote had told me it was an officer from Port Angeles who'd found the weapon. Of course, Charlie Swan probably had friends and plenty of time to plant the gun. What good would it do me to bitch and grumble about my position, anyway? None! Hell, Emmett couldn't influence what was happening any more than I could.

"Well, he's a pain in the ass and he hates me dating his daughter but I don't know that he'd go that far. He'd be risking his job and pension."

Or would he? I tossed it around in my head a little. His job probably gave him access to unregistered or confiscated weapons on a daily basis. Then again, whoever did this could easily be the same person who'd trashed the bike and Chief Swan had no need to do have done that. Finding me in the bar would have been enough to send me back inside for the remainder of my sentence.

Emmett cleared his throat and I refocused my gaze onto him.

"How's Rose doing?" he asked shyly and I smiled.

"She's finally started to talk with a counselor," I said and his face lit up. "It's baby steps, man, but I think it'll help in the long term. She still talks about you, you know. She's just...frightened you'll want more than she can offer."

"I'd never hurt her," he said and I believed him.

"Hey, you think we ought to go back and check on Cameron? See if his face has turned purple yet?"

Emmett shrugged. "He's your cell buddy."

I rolled my eyes. The guy didn't seem to have much of a sense of humor to start with and if he didn't rein in his temper, it was going to be one hell of a long stretch. "I guess we've left him dangling long enough."

Bantering as we wandered back to my cell, Emmett told me about the guy he was stuck rooming with who was, in Emmett's opinion, the most boring guy in the institution…someone who spent most of his time holed up in the cell making models out of matchsticks. He also confirmed what I'd suspected; that Cameron had recently been shipped in from a prison in Little Rock. Something to do with overcrowding, not that Emmett was buying that. Apparently, Cameron had been busy inserting himself into the pecking order by throwing his weight around and was generally pissing people off left, right and center.

Despite the fact a dozen or so other prisoners would have wandered past the open doorway and seen him, he was exactly where we'd left him. That's just how it went in these places…you didn't get involved in someone else's shit. I took a chance to study him while he was out of it and estimated his age to be probably mid-thirties. His hair was dark with an already receding hairline and, apart from currently being an interesting shade of red, his face was even featured and unremarkable.

"Time to wake him up," Emmett announced, filling a plastic cup with cold water before casually tossing it at Cameron's face and retreating to the chair by the sink.

I made sure I was standing square in front of him while he spluttered and coughed. He opened his eyes and, for a moment, seemed confused, incapable of understanding why I was apparently standing upside down and in his face. When the penny dropped that he was the one the wrong way up, he was seriously pissed, cursing and threatening as he wriggled to try and free himself. I had to admit, for such a wiry little guy, he had one hell of a temper.

"I'll fucking kill you when I get down," he screeched and I sighed. Time to bring the fear factor into play.

"Do you even know who I am?" I asked calmly, stroking a finger along the patchy stubble of his jaw.

His bravado faltered as he noticed the close proximity of my hips and I knew he was wondering if he was gonna get face fucked…as if, but he didn't know that. From the corner of my eye, I could see Emmett sitting at the table biting his knuckle to stop from laughing. I flexed my jaw, hoping it would send him the message to knock it off. If he got me giggling when I was trying to be threatening, I would definitely punch him later.

"Um, you're Cullen," Cameron replied, swallowing hard which confirmed my suspicion he was all mouth and no follow through.

"Eeeeeh…wrong! I'm the Dentist," I corrected, squeezing his mouth open and peering in at his teeth. "Extractions are my specialty…with or without anesthetic."

His eyes widened as mine narrowed.

"If you ever disrespect me again, I will give you a permanent cure for toothache. Do you understand?"

The insinuation was clear. If he pissed me off again, I'd be removing every tooth in his head.

"Yeees," he squawked, a distinct lack of spit making his throat dusty dry.

"Get him down, McCarty," I ordered, turning my back and walking away.

"McCarty!?" I heard him gasp as Emmett stepped up to free him from his jumpsuit bindings.

"Yo, Cameron," Emmett growled, ramping up the fear factor a little more and it was my turn to stifle a grin. His bad ass reputation was still legendary in this joint and it filled me with both pride and glee that I was privileged enough to call him Alice and get away with it.

"What are you doing here?" Cameron whimpered as his feet touched the floor.

"Why, didn't you know?" Emmett chuckled evilly, "Cullen's family...or at least he will be once I marry his sister."

A/N - Gah, I've missed Alice, soooo much.

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