Chapter 51
Sandor Clegane
That morning in bed, he told her about the dream he had while he was at Blackhaven. He wanted to make his leave as soon as the ceremony was over but he couldn't because they were all invited to stay for the night.
He told her that her Aunt Cat looked at him with such pride when did not tell them to fuck off and he stayed the night. They were there for three bloody days. He told her that Blackhaven was as massive as Winterfell, It was surrounded by lush woods and a waterfall behind it.
The more he enjoyed the scenery the angrier and more jealous he become, as those was supposed to be Leana's. She was supposed to enjoy them, to be Dondarrion's wife. White Knife was not as grand as Blackhaven. White Knife was massive but still...it was a military stronghold, not made for lavish living.
They broke their fast together with Dondarrion and his new wife, they looked fucking awkward together, there was no way in hell, Beric fucks his new wife. He told himself when he saw the couple.
They did not talk to each other. The man mostly talked to his Lord Stark. It was Lord and Lady Stark who made small talk with Dondarrion's wife.
"Was it a good dream?" she asked him, placing her palm on his face, kissing his lips softly.
He shook his head, 'no' he murmured, almost pitifully, she thought.
"Tell me," she snuggled closer to him. Resting her head on arm, facing each other, their bodies were touching and she could still feel his length nestled against her thighs. Sandor pulled the blanket over them and he held her close.
He told her his fucking dream: He was in King's Landing, guarding King Robert. It was one of those long boring day of King Robert receiving his lords. He heard the name Lord Beric of the Blackhaven announced and he looked up...
"I saw you, Leana..." He rasped.
"What was I doing? Was I with White or my Uncle Tyrion? Or Bronn?"
"No, you were with Dondarrion, you were married to him, you are heavy with child...his child, Leana."
She sighed, "Sandor...you have to stop this. I belong with you...and..."
"Dondarrion introduced you to King Robert and...I saw you, Leana." He kept talking – it was almost impossible to describe how he felt then.
"Sandor..."
"In my dream, I recognised you...you are my wife and I saw you smile...at King Robert, Dondarrion loves you...that he did...You see me but you don't know me...You smiled at me too...and..." He couldn't continue...it was too painful, she did not recognised him as her husband...just 'The Hound' the Kingsguard.
He saw Dondarrion lovingly urged his Leana toward the Iron Throne, placed his palm on the small of her back and she smiled sweetly at Beric, while all he did was stood behind his King, He was a fucking Dog, the mighty Hound, a leash ugly killer; how he hated himself and how desperate he was to call for her – but he couldn't! He opened his mouth but nothing came out. His Leana was another man's wife, heavy with another man's child...she looked well and happy, and it was obvious that Dondarrion cared for her.
There was no doubt that sooner or later, Lord Stark would come for his niece back to Winterfell.
He knew that if he wasn't force to marry Leana – his nightmare would become a reality in the near future and he'd truly witness the beautiful Leana Stark as Lady Dondarrion...And there was nothing he could do about it...apart from drowning himself in ale. He woke up drenched in sweat, jumped off from his bed and wanting to rode back home.
"Sandor Clegane!" as Leana shook him forcefully.
"I wanted to touch you...but I couldn't move...I want to tell you that you are my wife and we have Xander...We took Simon under our protection...I wanted to take you away, touch you and then...I woke up. FUCK Leana, I couldn't imagine if..."
He felt Leana grabbed his hand and placed it on her belly, "This is your child. We have Simon and we have Xander. We are not in King's Landing Sandor Clegane...who am I?"
"You are my wife,"
"You are my husband...The lord of White Knife, you are Sandor Clegane. You are my life Sandor. I know no other man. I love you Sandor." She kissed him and then he placed his head on her bosoms, feeling at peace.
He heard her whispered softly in his ear, "In a few moons, we will have three children, Sandor Clegane," He suddenly remembered Ser Barristan before he left King's Landing. The Lord Commander said when they next meet; he'd have fathered lots of sons and daughters.
"Blackhaven is beautiful, Leana."
"I am in love with White Knife...it's ours. If you love Blackhaven that much...why don't you stay and marry Lord Beric yourself and..."
Leana yelped in surprised as Sandor started attacking her with his kisses, his thick short beard tickled her - she heard him laughed.
He was home at White Knife with his wife and sons. The couple lay in bed, not wanting to get out from their chamber and started the day... sated - until they heard knocks at their door and the guards telling them 'it's the little lords' but did not opened the door for them. The guards must have known that they were just fucking, they weren't very discreet. Actually they were never discreet. Many times Leana begged him to send the guards away, but he said no.
Leana saw him smile, a sweet smile that she saw often.
Sandor quickly found pulled his breeches and walked to open the door for his sons. He saw Simon holding both of Xander's arms as the toddler walked and smiled sweetly at the guards. One of the guards was squatting to mussed Xander's curls. The guard asked he could show him his single tooth – and he did, Xander opened his mouth for him.
Bronn said his pup has a sweet disposition like his wife, until he wanted something. He lifted the boys and carried them both in and thrown them in bed, they were laughing.
More than a fortnight away from his boys, he thought they grew bigger and taller. He saw Xander's chubby legs were full of scratches; the left side of his forehead was blueish green, no doubt from falling, as he remembered his son wanted to run before he could even walk.
Xander looked surprise to see him. His eyes enlarged in recognition and happiness. He kissed his both his sons. Simon started telling him how he spend the three weeks, told him Bronn thought him some tricks which he couldn't wait to show him and Xander greeted 'papa' over and over again. Sandor thought he was truly a fucking milk toast.
He asked Xander what happened to his bumpy head, his son touched his sore forehead and said, "Pain," within seconds their talkative nine years old started telling him how his brother got the bump how the Keep was in uproar as they all heard his scream and thought something terribly bad happened to him.
They were in bed, listening to their chatter when he looked at his wife, "I don't think Dondarrion bedded his wife..."
"SANDOR!" She looked at him in disbelief and he saw Simon looking at him with curiosity. But slightly thankful that he didn't said 'fucking' his wife.
"What's bedded, father?" he asked innocently. Bronn taught him a lot of new words over the two weeks but bedded was not one of them. He liked the carefree man, he was funny and had a lot of trick up his sleeve.
"Sleeping in bed," Leana answered quickly.
"And...How the hell do you know?!" she looked at her husband who was already tickling Xander's fat tummy. Her baby boy couldn't stop calling for his papa.
"Oh...I know...I am a man," He gave her a look and made her blush.
He saw Lord Beric's face and he didn't look like a man who bedded his maiden wife. The morning after their wedding night, Leana couldn't stop blushing; she couldn't look at him in the eyes and not turned red.
He bet that if he had no beard and long hair covering his face, she'd be able to see him blushed too. After he took his wife for the first time, he couldn't stop touching Leana, especially when they were seated together having their meals or when they were walking through the market.
The Dondarrion couple looked awkward; they sat next to each other but made sure they were far enough - not touching. They don't talk to each other; Lord Beric spent his time talking to his Lord Stark while his bride sat quietly and poking around her food on the plate, looking miserable instead of shy. Both Leana and he were always hungry after their coupling.
Later on, he told her about the Dondarrion wedding, he was seated with Lord Stark, Robb and Jon Snow. Dondarrion married Lady Allyria Dayne, and the man didn't look happy at all. He remembered his own wedding at King's Landing, his wife might be dragged and battered but he was damn happy.
Dondarrion's face was sour and grim, not a smile on his fucking face. Even Lord Eddard Stark was looking at the man, unsure of his state. He congratulated the young lord and the man only nodded, not a smile on his stiff face – he actually looked upset.
He approached the bride and gave her the jewelled mirror and told her it was from his Lady wife who couldn't attend her wedding as she was heavy with child. He saw Dondarrion looked at him and the gift in his wife's hand. Lord Beric said to him that he would like to 'show Leana, Blackhaven, and that she would like see the waterfall'.
He told Leana that Beric was looking behind him when he walked in with Lord Stark; Beric was looking for a sight of her; even Lady Stark looked uncomfortable when she saw the groom was still looking for her niece on his wedding day.
They were all seated in a long table when a stupid drunken knight was talking to Jon Snow and the man opened his big mouth.
"Have you seen such an angry looking groom?" the man slurred to Jon Snow. Jon just laughed it off and ignored the man.
"My Lord is still in love with the Stark woman."
Jon Snow saw his Lord Clegane stiffened and drank his wine like it was honeyed water. His step mother almost choked on her food, while his Lord father stayed still.
"It's gossip." Jon Snow replied stiffly.
"No, it was no gossip my Lord...He waited for her for fifteen fucking years, but she married another – not by choice though and she is already with children...Lord Beric's mother wanted him to take a wife and an heir for Blackhaven. Lord Beric refused, they were shoutings...and,"
Jon Snow decided it was enough, he grabbed the drunk man and took him further away from Sandor who was seated between him and his Lord Father.
Lord Stark saw Jon Snow took the drunken man away from their table, but his rambles were soon replaced by another. The whole damned table was talking about the young Lady Stark who was promised to Dondarrion but marry another. She was now married to a killer called the Hound with a hideous melted face. They were sorry for her fate but were sorry for Lord Beric too.
He looked at his niece's husband who looked murderous but the man obviously tried to control himself while the entire place was talking about his wife and his face. Then slowly but surely the people around them saw Sandor's face, they started telling their friends to shut up and some of them were looking at his direction; he was a very big man, not easy to missed!
Ned saw his wife looked at Sandor with concern. He saw her stood up from her seat, "Cat," He called her, unsure of what she'd do.
"This is silly," he heard his wife murmured as she took Jon Snow's seat. She knew how uncomfortable the big man was, they all saw Dondarrion was openly still looking for Leana when they entered the Keep and saw Sandor clenched his jaw in annoyance.
She was now seated next to Sandor, Lord Stark saw his wife grabbed the man's massive hand and said to him, "Everything happened for a reason. Fate can be cruel but it can be forgiving, Sandor. I cursed the day Benjen took Leana away to Casterly Rock because I don't know the part she plays in our life...your life...big or small we all must do our part...Leana belonged to you Sandor Clegane. Don't you dare forget that."
Catelyn Stark looked at the man's face not with pity or fear or disgust but with affection, she grazed his burnt melted face with her hand with a smile of her face. Just like she hold Bran's face before she left Winterfell.
This boy was deprived of his mother's love. Leana told her about his childhood, he doesn't remember his mother, his father lied about his burn and his brother was a cruel man who burned his face. No wonder the man bathe his own infant...trying to give his son what he never had or felt.
She recalled, barely a month after Xander was born, she found the massive man hunching over a bucket of water in her kitchen; He gently placed the infant on his big hand and very carefully lowered him to the bucket of warm water and cleaning him with small cloth. The babe was so calmed and relaxed; he started closing his eyes and dozed off to sleep while he was in his father's arm and in the warm bucket of water. That was the first of the many; the man found courage to bathe the infant and he never looked back.
She smiled as she saw Sandor who obviously forgot to brought cloth to dry his newborn – he managed to take off his own top to dry and bundle the sleeping infant. She laughed and smile all the way to her husband. Since then she often found the man bathing his infant son and the servants would stop whatever they were doing and gawked at him with a smile of their faces.
"Lord Beric needs to figure his life...as Leana's father figured his when Leana's mother pass...as you figure out yours when you let Leana go...We all have our sins and love, Sandor...you hear me?"
Catelyn Tully remembered how crushed she was when her betrothed Brandon died and just like a pair of shoes she was to be given away to marry his brother Eddard, who was now the love of her life. But she trusted her beloved father, she refused to believe that he'd marry her to someone not worthy of her and, she was right.
Sandor looked at the woman who had her palm on his burnt face, she was telling him how each of them have their own shit in life that they had to live with, their own loss and fate. His fate was with Leana and his children. He was glad that Leana wasn't there to hear about those remarks from Dondarrion's men. He knew her gentle heart, she still felt guilty over Beric. That was why Leana was so darn happy that Beric had taken a wife, she didn't want to feel the guilt any longer.
Without realizing, he covered the woman's hand on his face and he nodded. Is this what it feels like to have a mother? Is this what Simon feels when Leana kisses his dirty sweaty face after training? Is this what it feels like when Leana hold Xander in her arms, soothing him when he cried? He often saw Leana combing Simon's hair after he took his bath, the boy stood still with a smile on his face and let his mother comb his hair, like him, Leana insisted for the urchin to bath every single day!
Very often Simon pleaded with Leana, he hated cleaning his teeth with the bristled twig. All Leana had to do was held the twig in front of his face and gave him a frown, Simon would clean his teeth and Leana would smile at him.
He saw Catelyn Stark smiled sweetly at him and said, "Now...tell me, Sandor...what's my daughter up to?"
TBC
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