AN: This just sounds/reads odd. I don't know why. Just warning. Hopefully it'll be cleared up by the next one.


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Chapter 52

Decisions

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She came awake quickly to the sound of her brother's voice yelling out, "Nice throw." Her head twisted as her eyes shot open and her body instinctively moved to shoot up. She groaned, not a good idea, she quickly realized and let herself fall back down.

"Whoa," Logan said quickly coming to her side, "probably should take it a little easy," a small smile accompanied his words as a hand slid against her head.

"Now you tell me," she followed with a sigh. "How is she?" Her gaze moved to the spot Logan had just left, the white basinet where their daughter lay.

"Sleeping, which is what you should still be doing," he smiled again. "They wake you?" he nodded towards the window.

"I think so," she murmured as she heard a door close. "How long was I asleep?"

"Almost half an hour," he said as his hand once more brushed back the stray waves of hair.

"Hmmm," another murmur, "I feel gross." Her tee-shirt had become a second skin.

He smiled some more, "I think gross is more than one up compared to where you were an hour ago."

A groan of true disgust and displeasure at the memory, tired, achy and dirty had nothing on that.

"I thought I heard your voice," Trudy said softly as she pushed open the door, stopping briefly to look down upon the sleeping newborn, "I'm sorry about the boys, I told them to keep it down. How are you feeling?" She asked as she moved over to the bed.

"Disgusting"

Trudy smiled knowingly.

As if she's ever gone through this, Max thought in annoyance, Sage is her nephew.

"How about I get a washcloth and some water, clean you up a bit?"

Max shook her head and pressed down on her hand pushing herself up, "I can do it myself." Wow things were hurting that she didn't even know she had.

"Hey," Logan began as Trudy said, "Max," as they both moved to keep her in bed.

"You need to rest for awhile longer," Trudy said taking over.

She turned to Logan, "I just want to wash my face and change my shirt."

He looked at her debating about the determination he saw in her face, he sighed and moved to slip an arm in behind her to help her up the rest of the way. She groaned as her feet swung over the edge.

"Sure you want to do this?"

Dark eyes shot up in irritation, "Just help me up will you?"

He smirked and laughed as Trudy looked on in confusion at their interactions as he did just that.

"I can walk on my own," she said as Logan's arm stayed braced around her, supporting most of her weight as they moved.

"Max," he was only about to put up with so much.

Her need for independence fully reared its ugly head, " Logan," she stated back just as firmly.

"Fine," he said and started to release his grip slowly.

Woah, where'd her legs go? She dropped less than a centimeter before his arm tightened around her again.

"You done playing tough girl?" he asked looking down at her gently.

Her eyes stayed focused ahead on her goal of the bathroom, "Shut up."

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She came back out to freshly changed sheets wearing an olive button down of Logan's Trudy had handed in to Logan who had refused to leave her side despite her orders otherwise. She refused to be affected by the changes in her body, refused to allow her mind to allow in that vain girl who didn't want Logan seeing her this way.

Logan's baby, he was the one who did this to her. At least that was what her mind kept repeating, she had actually smirked as Logan had gone to help her remove the shirt as she thought of her insecurities as she struggled for a reason behind them. It was that she wanted him to want to do it again. Talk about twisted, thinking about sex less than an hour after having a kid.

Kid.

That distracted her from the horror of not only not being physically perfect, but weak.

Baby.

'Did we decide on a name?' she asked as his fingers nimbly fastened the buttons on her shirt.

That distracted his attention and he looked up with yet another smile, 'No, we did decide you hate about three hundred names though.'

She smiled and looked only slightly apologetic, not her fault he had a bad last name. 'I still think we should name her after your mom.'

'My mom hated her name.'

She'd heard this argument before, but she wanted the baby to have something of his for the times she wouldn't have his last name. She sighed as her head tilted back and pondered, 'So what about Alicia, Alyssa," her head dropped down, 'Allison.' That worked. Not cutesy, not trendy, a normal, solid, good name, close to Alice

He must have agreed because he looked up.

'Allison,' she nodded.

'Allison Evelyn Cale,' he said.

She smiled, Evelyn after Eva, she nodded, 'Allison Evelyn Cale.'

So they'd stepped back out into the room with a name for their daughter and she repeated it softly as she leaned into Logan as they stood overlooking the sleeping infant as Max's finger softly traced over the tiny hand.

"She'll be up soon enough Max," Trudy said walking over steering her and Logan back towards the bed. "I want you to get some rest, both of you," she shot Logan an accusing look. "You both need to learn to sleep when she's sleeping."

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She took in his exhausted eyes as he settled himself into the wooden chair positioned by their daughter's basinet. She'd woken up as he'd gingerly lifted himself out of bed trying not to disturb her. A quick look at the clock next to her informed her she'd slept for yet another half hour.

She watched him for a moment as he settled in close to just watch Allison as she slept; he wasn't touching her just looking down at her. She was about to tease him, ask him if she was still breathing when his eyes still full of compassion and love looked up and back over to the bed, to her stopping any thought she had.

He guiltily smiled at being caught, "Sorry didn't mean to wake you."

She shrugged her shoulders, didn't really bother her.

"You should probably go back to sleep."

Funny, she was tired, but she suddenly didn't want to sleep. She didn't want to miss this. She didn't know what it was, but this feeling mattered more than sleep. "She still breathing?" she finally remembered to ask with a smile.

Another guilty look, "Appears to be."

"You're not trying to wake her up are you?"

He laughed softly and his head shook, "I'm not that stupid. Pissing her off, is probably about as smart of an idea of pissing off her Mama," he teased.

Mama? That teasing words sounded even better than it had a few days ago. She'd never really had one, yet now she was one. She realized now for sure her mother must have loved her, at least a little bit. She knew now it was completely impossible not to.

She smiled, "You should probably get some sleep Logan."

He turned and caught his reflection in the mirror, his hair had been showing signs when he arrived of his fingers running through it as he rushed to get her, that had been hours upon hours ago. Right now it was all sticking up in an undifferentiated mess. His eyes were starting to be lined and bags were starting to make an appearance. His clothing was shockingly in order despite what it had gone through, the baggy gray sweats and white tee shirt appearing no different than all the nights Max had tried to freeze him out of the penthouse.

"Good thing her eyes don't focus yet," he said turning back to catch another glimpse of 'her.'

"Never know, she is half me."

Logan looked over, "Kittens eyes are shut at birth," he said seriously as he teased.

Max made a face, "Yea never been so happy to see a pair of blue eyes in my life." No barcodes, no tails, lids open, they were out to a good start.

He laughed softly as he leaned back in the chair, examining Max as he'd set out to do a few minutes ago. His lips curved up in puzzlement and Max couldn't help but smile as she too started to look confused as Logan turned back to the window.

"What?" she asked as Logan was once more facing her and slightly shaking his head.

"How is it I look like this and you're the one that just had the baby?" he asked.

Only Loganshe thought, she'd seen what she looked like earlier in the bathroom. She shook her head at him.

"What?" he asked seriously.

She shook her head, "Will you just come back to bed before she wakes up?"

He laughed as he started to stand. The baby started to stir for that, their first words above the lowest decibel Logan could hear.

Max once more started to shoot up, but decided to give a low groan instead as Logan's fingers hovered over Allison as he shot a worried look over at Max. The baby quickly fell back asleep without ever really waking up and he looked back up, apologetic once more.

"Bed," was all she said.

He shook his head and smiled as he moved 'round. He gently stroked the side of her face before settling into bed causing her to turn away from their daughter to him.

She ignored the pain as she turned to her side and curled into him and he dropped down a kiss to the top of her head once she was settled.

It was worth it.

Not just the pain of the present, but the pains of the past. They had all been worth it to get her to this very point in time


Thanks for reading everyone!

Babyboo: Okay I'm hoping you make it back over to this category on your own because you didn't leave your email. Thanks for reading. I'm glad you didn't fall asleep on your keyboard or anything.

Bob: So glad your upheaval has allowed you to return to us.

Allison: Hi new reader, totally wish I could say I named the baby after you, but it was planned that way and I'm too nice to lie. Welcome to my story though. You should come check out the Dark Angel Reflection Board, got tons of ML (it's the first site when you google it).