Chapter 49
Didn't see that one coming, psychic?
AN: I am really sorry about really long update time, but my family has been going through a very tough time, so it has been hard to write funny. Also, LOTS of schoolwork didn't help either, and I am failing math. NOT good.
I don't own Twilight.
Edward POV
I listened closely until they were distracted, and when I heard they were, I flinched.
'OK, we're ready.' I texted Esme.
'Send in Nessie.' She replied. I nodded to my daughter. She smiled and took off to the main house with cell phone in hand. I listened again.
'They didn't notice. Is Emmett ready?' I sent to Esme.
'Yes, Rosalie is ready for further instruction.' She sent back.
'What do I do now?' Rosalie sent.
'Pick up Coco. Then go to the porch under your bedroom window.' I replied.
'Pick up Bentley, and then lower the harness down to Rosalie. Attach the clip to the window, and then lower the smaller harness. Clip that one to the same place.' I sent to Carlisle. I listened until I was sure he was set, and then sent the instructions to Rosalie.
'Put your legs through the harness and pull up over your shoulders.' I sent to Rosalie.
'Jeez, it sounds like someone is giving me a wedgie.' I rolled my eyes.
'Clip the smaller harness to the front clip on your stomach. Slip Coco inside and wait for Esme.' I sent another one to Carlisle.
'Do the same thing to your window, and pass down Bentley to Esme when you are ready.' A few minutes later Carlisle replied.
'We are ready. Esme and Rosalie are in place. Emmett and Nessie have their cell phones and are ready.'
It was time to send one to Jacob. 'We are set. Wait in the forest about a minute away. I'll text you about thirty seconds before for your cue.'
'You've got it, leech.' I rolled my eyes. Bella was looking over my shoulder and a devious smile came onto her face. She grabbed my phone.
'Call me that again and you will never be allowed to date my daughter.' She smirked as she closed the phone. I could very faintly hear him gulping in the forest down the driveway.
'You've got it, all mighty honor king sir.' He replied back almost immediately. I laughed; she was genius. I took Bella's hand and we walked back to the house. We waved to Esme where she rested ready on the porch. She smiled and winked.
Carlisle was ready with his cell phone inside the house, one hand on Nessie's shoulder. Nessie was sitting next to Emmett, his arm wrapped around her shoulders. By touching her, we realized Alice couldn't see any of them. See any of them, if she were paying attention. But she and Jasper were a little busy right now.
I nodded and we put the plan into action. Bella sat down next to Nessie.
"Nessie, I need to get a few things at the mall. Would you like to come with me?" I listened and heard that Alice was still slightly distracted, but was paying attention to what Nessie and Bella were saying. I quickly sent the message to Jake. I nodded to Nessie to continue.
"Sure! Should we ask Alice if she wants to come?"
"No, it's fine. I'm sure she won't want to come. She's busy."
"What?!" Alice shrieked from upstairs. There was a quick scrambling from Jasper and Alice's room, and Jasper sighed. Alice came bolting down the stairs. She had just her underwear on and one of Jasper's jacket covering her front, but that didn't mean she was covered to Jacob who was just approaching. Plus, she was wearing a very lacy black and red thong, perfect for the angle Jacob was coming at.
"HA!" He screamed, making her jump. He pulled out his phone and started taking pictures of her in her underwear. While Alice was trying to get the phone out of his hands, the jacket fell off, making Jacob laugh even harder. Meanwhile, the plan was set in action.
"Edward!" Rosalie yelled at the top of her lungs. I pretended to look scared for Alice, and then sprinted up the stairs. I hopped out of my window and joined Rosalie near the garage. I was close enough to Coco for me to be disguised to Alice.
Rosalie and I snuck into the garage and silently pulled the door open. We lifted up Alice's Porsche and carefully brought it into the forest. We made sure she couldn't see us, and then started sprinting. We brought it to the treaty line where Seth, Embry, and Quil were waiting.
"Geez, how much money do you guys have?!" Embry said looking at the car.
"Focus, mutts. You know what to do." They nodded and we sprinted back. Rosalie hooked herself back onto the clips and Carlisle pulled her up. He went to help Esme and Jasper while Rosalie fixed her outfit. I went back into the living room to hold my cover.
Esme POV
I hooked onto the trees, swinging back and forth on the cable. I glanced into Jasper and Alice's room. He was just slipping his pants on, but still had no shirt on. It was time.
I was about to swing in when I realized the window was closed. I tried to flag him down by waving frantically, but he wasn't paying attention. I rolled my eyes and pulled a twig off the tree. I chucked it at his window. He jumped when it hit, but opened the window. I swung in as he was putting his shirt on.
He gave me a look that said, 'I can't believe I am actually doing this.' I shrugged.
"She is going to kill me!" He whispered as I flung open the doors to their closet.
"Emmett and Edward- maybe. You- never." I whispered back. We gathered as many of their clothes in our arms as possible and shoved them into black garbage bags. We left her wedding dress and the dress she was wearing when she and Jasper met. Those two she would really kill us for. Carlisle came in the room meaning Rosalie and Edward were set. Rosalie came in two minutes later and also helped us. We gathered all the bags and sprinted out the windows.
The whole while we were running Jasper was muttering, "I'm dead. I'm dead. I'm dead." Rosalie rolled her eyes every single time.
We eventually got to the treaty line where Seth was sitting in the front seat checking himself out in the mirror. Embry and Quil were sitting on the back, pretending to wave like princesses. Embry would blow a kiss every once in a while and Quil would pretend to be choked up and put his hand over his heart.
Seth was adjusting his mirror to get a better look when he saw us. His eyes froze on the reflection in the mirror. Rosalie waved, and then a flash crossed Seth's eyes. A mischievous smile crossed Seth's face.
"Hey guys, you're doing it all wrong. You forgot to greet each other in the foreign way first."
"Right!" Quil shouted. Him and Embry leaned forward and kissed each other on the cheek. When they were turning to kiss on the other cheek, Rosalie decided it was time to make her appearance.
"BOO!" She shouted, jumping. Embry shrieked and fell forward. His and Quil's lips met. They normally would've realized it right away and stopped, but Jasper sent a wave of love at them. They proceed to have a full on make out session. I was too hysterical to cover my eyes at the sight.
"Jasper!" Carlisle scolded. Jasper smiled and stopped, and both the boys broke away. They both knew it was Jasper.
"Dude, what the hell?!" Embry shouted.
"My true apologies, your heinesses." He laughed. They both blushed.
"OK, here are the clothes. Stick to the plan." Rosalie said as we tossed the bags to them. They ripped them open and started to decorate the forest with Jasper and Alice's clothes.
Embry ripped open a bag they contained some of Jasper and Alice's more private clothing. Embry cringed and walked over to Jasper. He simply placed the bags that they had collected with things like that in Jasper's arms.
"You can keep these." He said, cringing again. He smiled before we ran back to the house. Jasper put the clothes in the back of Rosalie's closet, and went down fully dressed to join his near naked wife.
"Hon, why don't you go get some clothes on?" She nodded and raced up the stairs. I heard her go into her room and open the doors to her closet.
And then she let out an ear piercing scream.
SOOO SORRY FOR THE WAIT!!! I WILL TRY AND GET THE NEXT CHAPTER UP SOONER!!!
