**A/N: Long. Oh so long. But you've got fluff, smut and plot. This chapter is jammed packed with it all.
But because this chapter is so long, I hope you'll forgive me about this next part: there will be no update next week. Trust me, it hurts me a LOT to say this, but after a year and a bit, it is the first time that I have not had enough time to write the next chapter. School is almost over, which means there's a lot of assignments, and because I'm unlucky, I've also had a pretty bad cold and a pinched nerve, so even when I had down time, I couldn't do much.
WARNING: Cliffhanger at the end of this chapter.
Chapter 50-Like A Wish
"The light inside this room like a halo over you shines on your face. Takes me away to the rhythm of your breath. Beautiful, I must confess moves like a song. This is where I belong, I don't want to leave this place. I just want to stay forever. Can't believe you're here with me. Your heart is all I'll ever need. Like an angel you must be sent down straight from heaven. Like a wish that just came true, all I'll ever need is you. Never want to lose this feeling. Don't wake me up if I'm still dreaming."
~If I'm Still Dreaming, The Triple XXXs
Steve tip toed through the door of their apartment, trying not to wake his family. It was just after seven on a Monday, and he knew they were all still sleeping. Nonetheless, he was trying to get back into a healthy routine, so he had gone on his early morning jog while Jamie snored slightly and Bethany rolled onto his empty side of the bed, claiming it as her own.
Moving into the kitchen, he went to assemble Theo's lunch bag for the day. He caught himself wondering if they could switch what school he went to, since the one he was at now was far and out of the way and Theo complained about the commute and the kids in his class. It felt like the best decision for the little kid, but they didn't have real parental rights over him, which meant he'd be staying at the school until further notice. It had been a little over two weeks since he arrived at their place, and they had welcomed him into the family right away. The kid had been settling in nicely, claiming Jamie's room as his own, but everyone was still worried about Jen. No one was more irritated at her than Bethany.
"With SHIELD, we found hundreds of people each week and we can't even find one person in two weeks?"
Steve knew she was being serious, but he couldn't help but smile and remind her how long it took for them to find him. She was not impressed, and he quickly responded with "You're right, that wasn't funny."
Clint and Natasha's search took them half way around the world, but they were returning later that day so they could all make a decision on what to do next. To save Theo from constantly being reminded of his mother's disappearance, they elected not to tell the police, but instead told various governmental organizations who owed them and vowed to keep their eyes on the lookout and lips sealed. All they could do for Theo was to keep him as happy as they could.
Putting the lunch bag back into the fridge when he was done, he peaked at the time and decided to wake up Bethany before he had to get Theo up and ready for school. Nonetheless, he still tip toed, not wanting to wake up Theo prematurely or Jamie at all.
He smiled when he saw her, mouth slightly ajar as she was spread across their bed. He sat down beside her, taking care not to sit on her. "Doll?" Steve whispered, carefully touching her face.
"Mmm?" Bethany moaned, turning her face into the pillow. "What?" She mumbled.
He leaned down next to her, pressing his lips to her temple. "Are you planning on sleeping all day?"
"Yes," Bethany responded. He wasn't sure on whether she was being serious or not. Ever since the serum failed, Steve had been waiting for Bethany to fall into a depression. Little things she was doing, like sleeping a few extra hours than normal and eating as much as she did when she was pregnant was worrisome, but he didn't know how to bring it up. She seemed to be doing fine elsewise, and refused to talk about it. Everytime Steve would bring up the failed anti-serum, she would quickly change the subject.
"Are you really?" Steve asked.
Bethany didn't answer for a moment before turning on her side to face him. "No, I'll get up. A few more minutes?"
"Of course, it's only seven," Steve explained, pushing some hair behind her ear.
"Why did you wake me then?" Bethany asked, but with a small chuckle in her voice.
"I wanted to talk to you," he responded. "Is that a crime?"
"At seven? Yes," Bethany responded, shifting to give him more space on the bed before resting her head on his shoulder. "Did you go out for a jog?"
Steve looked down at his workout attire before nodding. "I thought with Theo living with us for now and Jamie finally getting on a schedule, I should too."
"I guess that means so should I," Bethany whispered, intertwining her hand with his.
"Not if you don't want to," Steve promised, but Bethany shook her head.
"I can't blame late night missions anymore," she pointed out.
"But you can blame late night feedings," her husband reminded her.
Bethany let out a long sigh, turning her head to briefly check on Jamie before leaning up to kiss the column of Steve's neck. "There's things I want to do, things I keep pushing back on. Today is the day I get out of bed, get out of the apartment and go back to the gym."
"The gym?" Steve asked, confused. "That-That's what you've been wanting to do?"
"I told you that weeks ago," Bethany defended. "Everytime we planned on going down together, we got distracted. I need to go. I need to get, not back into shape, but ready for battle again."
"'Ready for battle'?" Steve repeated.
Bethany shrugged. "I don't want to be in battle, but I do want to protect the boys. And in order to do that, I need to get back on the horse. It's almost been a year since I found out Jamie was in our lives, which means almost a year since I stopped going and working out. And, admit it, I'm not as flexible as I used to be."
"I hadn't noticed," Steve said truthfully.
"Well, you will when I get it back, I can promise you that," Bethany replied, winking at her husband. "I need you to push me to my limits today though. Don't let me off easy. I need to be able to protect them. They deserve my very best."
"And by 'they', you mean Jamie and Theo?"
Bethany looked at him, not saying anything in response at first, but then sighing and nodding. "I don't think she's coming back willingly, Steve. I just… She wants to be with him, and maybe even clear his name so he can come back? She won't be able to do that, we both know that. And even if she comes back by herself, she'll know we won't let her leave or contact him-"
"Theo is still her son," Steve interrupted. "She loves him. A mother's love is bigger than anything else."
"I don't know," Bethany sighed. "I just… I've been thinking about what if I was in her place. I would want to find you."
"But leave Jamie? Forever?" Bethany looked torn, and Steve understood. He felt the same thing. "It's been months since we told her. She clearly had a lot of time to think it through. But I think she'll come back. Until then, all we can do is treat Theo like he's a part of the family."
"No," Bethany corrected. "He is a part of the family."
Bethany carefully strapped Jamie into his swing, turning the knob so it would rock him slightly. The little kid fussed, not liking not being in someone's arms, but Bethany knew that for the next hour or so, she had to distance herself from Jamie in order to protect him in the future.
"Go to sleep, you silly boy," Bethany spoke softly, attaching a mobile to the swing for him to look at.
"You ready?" Steve asked, waiting by the boxing bags.
Bethany cast one more look to Jamie before moving next to her husband. "Thanks," she whispered as he handed her the wrap for her hands. "I don't need this though-"
"I don't like seeing your fists bloodied and bruised, even for a few seconds. Plus, you can go longer with these on. Don't argue, just listen."
She sighed, nodding. He helped her tape her hands up before she started throwing punches at the bag. "Stop," Steve spoke firmly. "You're all over the place." He put his arms around her and started to guide her every punch. "There. Much better."
"My arms already feel like rubber," Bethany sighed, keeping up her pace.
"Just keep going," Steve replied. "After this, we'll get into some sparring. I'll go easy on you if that'll-"
"No," Bethany responded. "Don't go easy on me. It won't help. An attacker won't go easy on me. And it could happen today. Happen tomorrow."
Steve didn't respond, but did step back to let Bethany do her thing. She could feel the burn in her arms spread farther into her body, but she didn't let herself slow down. If anything, she got faster. With every punch, a different face flashed through her head. Pierce. Loki. Zola. Ward. Her mother. And one that surprised her, Howard.
She halted at that one, seeing his face on the punching bag. She frowned slightly, wondering why he popped up. Every other face she saw had something, something major in common. But Howard. Howard didn't hurt her, betray her like the rest of them did.
"What's wrong?" Steve asked, watching as she took a step back from the bag.
"Uh… no, nothing," Bethany said, shaking her head. "I just… I was picturing all the people who… well, you have done me wrong and Howard popped up. I don't know why."
"Do you want to talk about it? To figure it out?" He questioned, moving to steady the swinging boxing bag.
"To be honest, I'm not sure where to start. Can we just… Spar?" She asked, looking like she was at a loss for words. "Sorry, I just… it made me…"
Steve could see her struggling to get her thoughts into words, so he immediately nodded. "Of course, if that'll help."
They moved into position, Bethany still wearing a look of confusion on her face. Never had she ever counted Howard on the list of people who had betrayed her. Not even through the years when he wasn't there for her. He was busy, saving the world or even, as in most cases, saving himself. But through those years, he always made sure someone was there to watch over her, whether it was Peggy, Edwin Jarvis or McCain.
"You ready?" Steve asked, not pressuring her but searching for assurance. He didn't like how confused she looked, worried that her mind was too far in the past to focus on the present.
"I'm just frazzled on why Howard popped up, that's all," Bethany explained again, raising her arms for a battle stance. "But I'm ready."
Steve nodded, moving in and starting their spar slowly, getting a feel of where she was. A lot of her kicks and punches weren't as strong as they used to be, and she was right about missing a lot of flexibility, but her stamina was still present, as well as her balance. "Utilize those," Steve instructed, ducking out from a flying leg. "I feel like you should've stretched longer."
"You don't get to stretch in battle," Bethany reminded him, landing a kick to his stomach. He backed up a little, wincing as the pain quickly washed over him and faded away. "Stretched muscles will heal," she continued, moving a hand out in which Steve immediately took hold of and pulled her forward, twisting her arm around her.
"You get more flexibility," Steve prompted.
"I'm not the one of the floor," Bethany began before kicking a leg behind her and pulling his ankle out from under him. Steve kept a hold on Bethany, pulling her down with him, but her quickly flipping backwards, letting her arm be pulled and twisted in an unnatural manner.
Steve let go of her arm, Bethany popping it back into place with a loud groan before quickly flipping away from him, giving them a great deal of distance. "Don't make me taunt you," Bethany warned with a sly smile. "Stop going easy on me."
"You want me to go hard on you?" Steve asked. "You'll end up against the floor."
"Oh, I don't think so," Bethany winked.
"Okay, how about the wall?" Steve replied huskily, shoulders rising and falling despite that fact he wasn't exhausted from their show so far.
Bethany could feel her cheeks warm at the intense stare on his face, dominating her entire soul. "Take your best shot, Captain."
Steve quickly moved in, both of them in full battle mode, kicks, punches, pushes and headlocks being incorporated into their dance. Neither of them were winning, nor losing. It was a push and pull of who was better. Bethany's agility had the upper hand on Steve's speed and Steve's strength had the upper hand on Bethany's experience. Soon they were both panting, but neither of them was exhausted. In fact, they both had more energy than they had in a long time. It was only when Steve finally had Bethany up against the wall that they both stilled, watching the other's crazed eyes, perspiring skin, open lips and heaving chests.
The passion they had just experienced in their spar immediately travelled over to the passion they both had been missing through the last few months. They had a taste of it, but in that moment, it completely washed over them, the other unable to keep it hidden. Their lips met quickly, Steve wrapping his arms around Bethany's waist and pulling her up to his height.
There was no languid build up. It was heavy and hot from the moment their eyes met, now both of them being on fire. Every touch was like a burn, but so addicting, so arousing that they only pulled each other closer, Bethany's legs tight around Steve's waist and her hands on his shoulders, neck, into his cropped hair, everywhere and anywhere she could put them. She found his skin the most rewarding of them all, bearing no shame as she ripped the material of his shirt down his chest, her hands exploring every line, crevice and rise of his chest and stomach. She pressed her core to him, hard, only adding to her frustration. There were too many clothes in between them, and they needed to be ridded of them, and all she wanted was for Steve to tear them off of her, not caring at their state. She needed him now and she could tell he needed her too.
In that moment, it was only them, their arousal and desires dangerously high, both afraid the frustration, the painful need would never end, but at the same time relishing in it. They forgot where they were, what they had been doing and everything and anything in their lives that wasn't each other. They forgot everything except the tango they had long ago perfected, the perfect balance of give and take, of love and lust, and of him and her.
Bethany let out a needy whimper when Steve simultaneously dug his fingers into her upper thighs while moving his lips to her sweet spot and taking a quick and sweet bite. The need for release was already upon her, and Steve had barely done anything. She could already tell it was going to be a powerful, long and mind-shattering finale, leaving her in happy tears and Steve in joy that she finally had the reaction he was waiting for, and more.
One of his hands slipped up her sports bra, squeezing all the flesh he could get into his hand, Bethany tightening her legs against him. His sweet, unintentional torture was blinding her, robbing her of the ability to see straight or even open her eyes. But colours flashed with each spurt of intense feeling, either physical, emotional or mental.
The sound of the door sliding open and then closing brought Bethany back to the present, out of the moment of yearning. Opening her eyes, a real struggle at that too, she saw Natasha and Clint standing at the door, the red head with a smirk on her face and Clint trying to hold back a roaring bought of laughter. Steve, noticing that Bethany had tensed up, stopped his tortuous attention on her, turning his head, his eyes popping open in realization and slight horror.
"You do realize this gym isn't just for the two of you, right?" Clint teased with crossed arms. "And in front of the baby no less."
Bethany slid down the wall, feet touching the floor. She adjusted her sports bra, her skin still on fire, but with the added burn of embarrassment. "He's just kidding," Natasha explained, giving Clint a warning look. "We can, you know, come back later…"
"Is it about Jen?" Bethany asked, trying to catch her breath by swallowing the huge lump in her throat, quickly moving to check on Jamie, only to see that he was sound asleep.
"Yes," Natasha replied.
"And no," the archer finished. "We didn't find anything, travelling halfway around the world. Her bank account was steadily drained through the months, but a woman at her work did say she would get odd packages every few weeks with cheques in it. She claimed it was child support, but what child support costs five thousand dollars a week?"
"The child support form someone who is very rich," Bethany noted, leaning against the wall and looking over to Steve. He still wore a look of desire, his hair standing up and his broad shoulders rising and falling heavily. He was carefully touching the edges of his white t-shirt where it was ripped, but paying little care to the fact that his chest was fully exposed. "But her ex-husband isn't that good at his job. It must have been Jacob."
"Where would he get this money? And why send it to her?"
"He's a part of HYDRA," Clint reminded the soldier. "Steve, they've been festering for decades and are clearly prominent enough to cause hell. They have money. Probably illegally trading weapons or SHIELD documents? Does anyone know what this guy's position was inside of SHIELD?"
"He worked in the tech office a lot," Natasha replied. "He would know how to secure funds for himself."
"And he'd send the money so Jen could get to him under the radar. Probably through a lot of taxi cabs, non-commercial boats… I don't know, but it would make sense about why we lost her after she got to Sherbrooke. Probably took a bus."
"Our next step is finding Jacob, but then again, that's been the problem for months," Clint brought up. "How's the kid doing?"
"Pretty good, actually," Bethany stated, looking to Steve for affirmation, him nodding in agreement.
"Well, clearly Jen knew what she was doing when she left him with you two," Natasha replied. "Anyways, Clint and I set up a bunch of cameras that we're going to connect JARVIS to, in areas where the security is low, where SHIELD didn't have a lot of eyes. That way the chances of finding them are increased."
"If we're done here," Bethany began after a moment of silence. "I'm going to take a shower. A very cold shower," the last part said in a mumble, but loud enough to make Natasha smirk.
"I'll bring Jamie up," Steve promised, Bethany smiling softly and ducking out of the room. When she was gone, he put his hands on his hips, looking at the two ex-SHIELD agents expectantly.
"I'm sorry," Natasha granted with a laugh. "It's not the first time I've walked in on you two."
"It isn't?" Clint asked, confused on why she hadn't told him this.
"That's exactly the point, Nat," Steve sighed, before shaking his head and giving her a small smile. "All I'm asking is to knock next time? Please?"
"Well, each time it seems to get a little more serious," Natasha granted. "I'd hate to see what I'll see next time."
"Thank you," Steve nodded, looking to Jamie.
"That shirt is garbage, man," Clint stated, clearly enjoying the situation too much by the knowing smile on his face.
"Right," Steve nodded, shrugging it off his shoulders and putting it in the trash bin before looking at Jamie. "I don't want to wake him."
"We'll watch over him," Natasha promised.
"We will?" Clint asked, completely taken off guard.
Natasha cocked her eyebrow in a challenging look, which Clint quickly realized as his cue to shut up. "Go. See your wife. Before she gets into that shower."
Steve casted one more look to Jamie before nodding and excusing himself. Generally, he'd be embarrassed about the situation, but since Natasha knew about the couple's recent problem in the bedroom and Clint's favorite hobby was teasing Bethany—and for some reason, only Bethany- about all things related to sex, he pushed all that back and quickly sprinted up the stairs in hope to get there before the elevator did.
Bethany had only just entered the apartment when Steve made it to the top of the stairs. "What are you doing?" Bethany asked with a chuckle, the last of her words completely silenced by his demanding kiss. She was pushed up against the wall and Steve didn't let her surprise slow him down. He immediately worked on freeing her from her sports bra, hearing the seams protest as the material was all but ripped from her body.
Bethany questioned nothing, letting Steve wrap his arms around her body and carry her into their bedroom, their kisses reigniting the fire that had only dimmed a little bit. Within seconds, it was as if they hadn't been interrupted, each of them trying to absorb the other, pushing their bodies together, holding the other close and savoring every touch, moan and heat the other gave. Steve wanted her in that moment, and by the sweet little whimpers that were a telltale of when she was ready slipped out of her, he knew she was too. But he wanted to savor this moment, the moment of being completely on fire, yet the burn being pleasant and continually growing more so by the second. He wanted to drag this moment out until he was at the very edge, until Bethany was begging for him, until they were both almost mad with overwhelming lust. However, he didn't slow down their movements. He continued to kiss her with all his power, continued to grip at her body at the same pace and didn't hesitate to move his lips down to her sweet spot and torture her slowly. He had plans, so many plans on what he wanted to do to increase her sweet agony.
Through the weeks, as he occasionally would tease her, he was looking for signs of what she liked and what she loved. He thought he knew what those signs were, but they changed when she was pregnant, and even now, he could tell certain things weren't as enjoyable as before. But through slow and subtle exploration, he was able to find exactly the methods that would help bring Bethany over the edge with him, and with their sudden heat, he was sure she wouldn't be able to focus afterwards. He was highly anticipating that.
Certain things, like her sweet spot, would never change. That little area, so small only Steve had ever found it and memorized its residence with that first beautiful gasp, was no longer craving small, peppering kisses and long, sweet sucks. Now she liked when he ran a hand up her neck, tangling it into her hair while carefully biting the skin before sucking it. When he successfully carried out this tactic, she threw her head back, her moan stuck in her throat due to her breathlessness. For a moment, Steve worried about whether she could breathe at all, but when he lifted her up a little more; lowering his head to her breast and kissing it softly, the moan finally freed itself from her throat.
Her fingernails dug deep into his biceps, whether intentionally or not, Steve wasn't sure, but the pain was quick, the pleasure lasting longer. He pushed them down onto their unmade bed, his lips moving down her body to the elastic band of her yoga pants, kneeling on the ground and looking at her splayed on their comforter, body heaving heavily. Steve slowly pulled the pants down, leaving a trail of kisses down her right leg and then up her left. Steading his kisses inside her thigh, he looked for direction from her. Ever since she had Jamie, she had been against oral, for her own set of reasons. Steve hadn't pushed her, respecting every boundary she put up, just like she respected all the boundaries he put up.
But Bethany looked so far beyond recognition of what was happening that she didn't give him a warning look. Nonetheless, he needed approval from his wife, approval that she was okay with crossing the line they were walking. "Beth?" He whispered, the only word they had yet to speak. The word was quiet, but seemed to echo through their room.
"Close the door," Was her response. Steve frowned, wondering why this had been the one thing on Bethany's mind, but followed her instructions nonetheless. Their apartment was one with many uninvited visitors throughout the day.
"Beth," he began, having not gotten a real answer.
"Stop talking," Bethany replied softly, a small smile on her face. Steve rolled his eyes and decided he would slowly move forward and wait for a direct instruction to stop. Carefully and with great leisure, his kisses moved up to her center, cautiously placing kisses on the swollen, pink and wet area, listening as Bethany whimpered opposed to object. He used the same technique of opened mouthed kisses, dragging his lips together slowly over and over again, keeping his eyes trained on her.
Her fists clenched, grabbing the unmade sheets, legs tensing on occasion, Bethany forcing herself to relax the limbs. When Steve thought she had suffered enough sweet torture, her cries starting to become desperate opposed to pleasured, he moved his kisses up her body, leaving a wet trail in his wake. He finally reached her mouth again, kissing her with less passion than before, but Bethany barely having any breath to keep up with in the first place.
"Sometimes I hate you, you know," Bethany teased in between pants, in gesture to his ability to torment her for so long.
"I know," he responded, kissing her softly before sitting up. He watched as Bethany lifted her arms over her head, her body curling slightly as it radiated pleasure. She watched him expectantly, biting her lip softly as he pushed off the rest of his clothes and dig into his night table in search for a condom.
Digging deep into the mess of baby books and pacifiers, he felt Bethany's fingers trailing up and down his spine, shivers catching and spreading all over his body. He felt her everywhere. Steve had to stop his searching for a moment to soak in the feeling, to regain some sense and remember that the condoms weren't in the bedside table anymore. And as much as he wanted to get the condom, the feeling of her hand moving up and down his back and invisibly trailing the rest of his body was too good for him to want to stop it.
"Do you want me to go?" Bethany asked, sensing his inability to move.
"I can go," he whispered, but made no move, closing his eyes as her fingers continued to work their magic.
"Do you want me to stop?" She questioned, her movements slowing, but continuing nonetheless.
"Not really," he admitted.
"I'll continue after," Bethany promised, pressing her hand flat against his back.
Steve's shoulders sagged a little, but he nodded, getting up and moving to their dresser and taking the package out, deciding that it needed to be reintroduced to its old home, only moved since he felt weird about storing them with the baby's things. Now… now he didn't see a problem with it at all.
Bethany's promise rang true as her fingers continued to trail up and down as he took out a foil wrapper, carefully tore the package and put the latex barrier on. When he looked back to Bethany, her eyes were hazy with both lust and content, as if she was forever satisfied with staying in that position. Leaning down, he kissed her, quickly igniting her need for more as one leg curled itself around his waist.
Not breaking their kiss, he worked to shift their bodies until he was sure they wouldn't fall off the bed and firmly held her leg at his waist while the other one cupped her face. As he slid into her, she softly bit his lip, her entire body tensing. Her head tilted back slightly and the pattern she was making on his back stopped for a moment before she was able to regain some sort of mind, her breathing quickening as he gently rolled his hips out and then back into her. While his own pleasure was blinding, he was making sure to focus on where Bethany's body was at. Her moans, her sweet whimpers and her loving whispers encouraged him, but nothing quite as when her body gave out a quick spasm, showing how close she was.
He kept his pace the same, hearing her breathing hitch slightly, her moans slipping out of her mouth without permission and her muscles acting on their own accord. He moved his lips to her neck, slowly placing kisses everywhere but her sweet spot. Steve didn't just want a finale, he wanted a grand finale, one that would leave Bethany in a shaking, laughing mess that he could hold onto until her senses slowly came flooding back to her.
Finally, when Steve felt like he couldn't hold back any longer and knew that Bethany was close to crying for all the wrong reasons, he moved to that sacred sweet spot and listened as the beinning of the end came. Her breathing suddenly quickened to a dangerous speed until it caught in her throat, her entire body going into overload. Her trails on his back stopped, her muscles everywhere feeling her orgasm. Her entire body pulsated, shaking and quivering as she rode out endless waves of indulgence. And when Steve's own orgasm came, his wife's trembling only made it that much more satisfying.
Rolling to his side, he pulled her flush against him, kissing her face slowly and softly. It was minutes later before Bethany had gained enough control to smile up at him. "That was kind of amazing," she whispered.
Steve couldn't help but chuckle, kissing her nose softly. "I just needed to show you what you were missing. Show you what you can't live without."
"Steve, sex with us is always amazing because it's us. And that? They can't all be like that. It would take away the specialness of it. But I ain't complaining about that. That was…" She mimicked a sound of an explosion to get her point across. "But this is nice too."
"What? Lying here?"
"Yeah," Bethany whispered. "This is the only alone time we've had in… months. I love Jamie. And god, I love Theo too. But I miss having you all to myself."
"That wouldn't be a problem if you'd let people babysit," Steve teased.
"You know why I'm nervous about that," Bethany sighed. "Where's Jamie now, anyways?"
"He was sleeping when I left him," Steve promised. "So Natasha and Clint said they'd watch over him. I figured they couldn't get into a lot of trouble while he's sleeping. And Natasha is responsible enough. I think. I hope."
"But you're right," Bethany pointed out. "I can't, despite my want, watch over him all the time. I need this time with you. You need this time with me."
"Does that mean you'll think about letting them babysit?" Steve asked.
Bethany sighed, thinking about the situation. "None of them know how to take care of a baby," she began.
"Neither did I," Steve reminded her. "And neither did you the first time you watched over Tony."
"Maria was with me when I watched over Tony, so the first time I watched over him alone, I was confident," Bethany explained. "And you… you've done your research. And you are by far the most capable of taking care of a baby over anyone else. Two spies? A billionaire with commitment issues? A Norse God? And a scientist that likes to keep people at bay so he doesn't physically hurt them? You win."
"I'm not following," Steve finally said. "I thought you wanted a babysitter."
"I do. But… what if we, and this is a huge step for me, hire a babysitter. Have someone else here, but for security reasons over childrearing reasons."
Steve cocked an eyebrow, the idea compelling. "That doesn't sound too unreasonable considering the circumstances. What? You want a Nanny?"
"No," Bethany replied. "Just a babysitter. Someone who's not old and scary. And maybe a male Nanny, because those are always cool. I don't know, I just… I hate living in fear, and i also hate living in a world where I barely get to see you. Or at least, see you like this."
"I agree," Steve nodded. "Let's talk to everyone else about it and then get on with interviewing people." Bethany gave him a happy smile before closing her eyes contently. The room was quiet as they recovered, the only sound being the ceiling fan that Steve just realized was still on from the night before.
Suddenly, Bethany sat up, pulling the blanket with her. She had a frazzled look on her face, completely different from the content one she wore earlier. "Wh-What's wrong?" Steve asked, leaning up on his elbows.
"Does… Tony know about Bucky?" Bethany asked, looking to her husband.
"I mean, I'm assuming he put it all together when… well when we fought-"
"No, not that Bucky is alive, and that HYDRA had him," Bethany interrupted, because she knew that he knew about that. In fact, the only reason he knew any of that was because of her, but she said everything in passing, never thinking about the bigger picture. "But does he know that Bucky was the Winter Soldier and that the Winter Soldier killed his parents?"
"Oh," Steve responded, sitting up straight. "No. No, I don't think he does. Should we tell him?"
"I don't know," Bethany admitted. "I know Tony, though. If Bucky gets better-"
"When," Steve corrected.
"When Bucky gets better, I'm assuming he'll be a part of our lives. And Tony will always be a part of my life. If Tony knows-"
"Yeah," Steve whispered, getting where Bethany was going. "He's going to be mad when he finds out."
"If," Bethany corrected.
"No, when." Steve assured. "Beth-"
"I'll deal with it. I'll deal with him," Bethany promised.
Steve sighed, leaning back against their headboard. "I appreciate you not lying to me anymore, but you're still lying to others."
"I'm lying to Tony for you," Bethany tried. "Not everyone can win in this situation."
"But lying to your nephew? Beth, I can't ask you to do that."
"You're not," Bethany replied. "I'm doing it anyways. What Tony doesn't know can't hurt him. But knowing this… I don't know what'll happen, but we both know it won't be good."
Steve sighed, not knowing what to say. He understood where Bethany was coming from, but he hated that she was going to be put into another situation where she was going to lie to someone she loved. He opened his mouth to tell her this, but there was a knock at the door.
"Everyone decent?" Natasha asked through the door.
"One minute," Bethany called out, slipping out of the bed and grabbing her housecoat. "What's wrong?" She asked when she opened the door, Steve pulling the sheets over him.
"Phone," Natasha explained, handing it to her. "It's Theo's school. They've been calling consistently for the past ten minutes."
"Thanks," Bethany replied, taking the phone and moving into the corner of the room.
"So," Natasha whispered to Steve, her customary smirk upon her face. "Was it… satisfactory?"
Steve replied with a pointed, warning look, clearly telling her that it wasn't the place, the time or even a conversation he wanted to have. Natasha smartly backed off, turning her attention to Bethany. "They need us to pick Theo up," the blonde explained. "He's sick. What makes it even worse is that they tried to call Jen about an hour ago."
Steve sighed, being brought back to real life. "I'll go get him."
"You sure?" Bethany asked. "You hate making that commute."
"I was going to do it later today anyways," Steve pointed out before looking to Natasha again. "Do you mind?" He asked politely.
Natasha's face showed understanding. "Say no more. But first, Jamie woke up before I came up here. He and Clint are… I don't even know. But you may want to intervene before Jamie's first word is a very colourful one."
Bethany sighed, nodding as Natasha closed the door when she left. "Hey, it beats being one of Tony's nicknames," Steve responded. "If his first word is Spangles, I may actually kill Tony."
"And then the Bucky thing wouldn't be a problem," Bethany teased.
When Steve arrived back at the apartment, Theo in his arms, the room had been completely redecorated. He had texted Bethany when he got to the school and saw just how sick Theo was; fever, cough and constant complaints of nausea. Steve knew the feeling of being helpless and only being able to complain, so when he saw the room, he couldn't help but feel an outpour of love for his wife.
The couch was made up into a comfortable looking bed, the table pulled close to it with tissues, a bottle of water with a straw in it, some children's Advil—where she had got that, he wasn't sure and a bucket on the floor ready in case of emergency. On the stove, he could smell tomato soup, and the television was set to children's cartoons. Steve put Theo down on the couch, helping him change out of his school clothes and into his pajamas which Bethany had folded on his pillow.
"Here," Bethany said quietly, handing Theo the thermometer. "Under your tongue? Or armpit?"
"Armpit," Theo responded, voice lacking energy.
"Keep it there tight until it beeps," Bethany instructed. "Steve, can I borrow you for a moment?"
He gave no answer, clasping Theo tight on his shoulder before following Bethany to the kitchen. "You were busy while I was gone."
"Jamie is going to stay with Pepper and Tony just in case. I don't want him catching this," Bethany explained as she began to scoop some soup out of the pot and into a mug. "But we'll be contagious too, even if we don't catch this."
"Wait, so are you saying we can't even see Jamie?"
"Bruce is setting up something to de-contaminate us," she added. "One of us should stay with Jamie tonight while one of us is with Theo."
"I know I'm not the doctor, but aren't you generally more contagious before you actually get sick?"
"Typically," Bethany nodded. "But I don't want to take any chances. He's just a baby. If his immune system is normal, it'll be weak."
Hearing a beep, Bethany handed Steve the mug of soup before quickly going over to Theo and reading the thermometer. "Okay, take this," she began, taking out the right amount of medication. "No complaining about the taste. Trust me, it's much better now than it was before.
Steve let a little smile slip as he placed the mug in front of Theo, thinking about how far medication had advanced. He opened his mouth to give his own opinion on the childhood medications he endured when Natasha came into the room. "If you have a moment," she said, but facial features clearly reading that it was urgent.
"Have your soup, and rest, okay?" Bethany spoke, brushing back Theo's bangs. "I'll get you a damp cloth for your head when you're done eating."
Steve and Bethany moved over to the kitchen where Natasha set her tablet up on the island. "The cameras picked this up," she explained, the feed showing a man and a woman trying very hard to stay hidden, the wind betraying the woman as her hat went flying off her head. "The cameras Clint and I placed, by the way. So good thing we did."
"They won't be there for long," Bethany whispered, pausing the screen on Jen's face. "Where are they exactly?"
"Somewhere in France," Natasha revealed. "It's pretty impressive that they've been able to hide from the cameras this long."
"It's pretty impressive that HYDRA could hide in SHIELD as long as they did," Steve pointed out quietly. "We should move now, so we don't miss them."
"Tony already has a transport ready," Natasha nodded. "Clint and I are headed out now, I just wanted to let you know-"
"I'm coming with you," Steve corrected, earning confused looks from both women. "Someone needs to talk to her. You said so yourself Beth, we can't drag her back here if that's not what she wants."
"That's not exactly what I said," Bethany replied. "We just developed a plan for one of us to stay here while the other stays with Jamie and you're bailing already?"
"But is this not a higher priority right now?" Steve asked, immediately regretting it with the look on Bethany's face. "All I meant was… Beth, we don't have time to talk about this. Hopefully we'll be a couple hours, a few at the most. But we need to at least get Jacob. He's only one man, but we both know how much damage-"
"Okay," Bethany interrupted. "Look, I said I wouldn't fight you when you needed to go out. You'll have Clint and Natasha, so I can't argue this anymore. And you're right, it's a limited window. Go. Now. Before I change my mind."
Steve stilled for a moment before nodding, leaning down to kiss her forehead. "I'll keep you up to date."
"Just be safe," Bethany added, looking to Natasha. "Don't let him do anything stupid."
"You're asking a lot," Natasha teased before cocking her head to the side, indication that it was time to go.
Steve was thoroughly impressed by how quick Tony's aircraft got them to the last known whereabouts of Jen and Jacob. Since they knew that the fugitives were not using commercial travel, they could count on them not going too far.
"Bethany will kill me, but we need to split up," Steve said when they landed. "We'll be able to cover a whole lot more ground that way."
"You're right, she will kill you," Natasha confirmed. "But I agree. Three of us spreading out is better than one of us. And we have the element of surprise on our side."
"We just don't tell Bethany," Clint summarized. "You better not do anything stupid, Cap. She'll kill us too if something happens to you."
"I'll do my best," Steve promised, mounting on one of the three bikes that was stored on the aircraft. He didn't have his shield with him, something that would provide more protection, but at the same time would draw more attention. Instead, in the bike compartment, there was a gun and an earpiece. Putting the communicator in his ear, he watched as Natasha and Clint did the same thing.
"Call us as soon as you see him," Natasha stated firmly.
"We should round back here in two hours," Clint added.
They all agreed before they departed. Steve aimlessly drove around the city, through back alleys and into the sketchiest of areas for nearly an hour. He was trying to keep a low profile, but he couldn't help but notice a group of teenage girls staring at him, all giggling and whispering as he waited for the light to turn green. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see one girl take a picture of him.
He tried to seem like he didn't notice, but a million things ran through his head and the first thing was how the element of surprise could be gone if that went viral within the next hour. The next thing he thought about was what the gossip blogs would say about him being in France, without Bethany, seemingly without purpose. Since Bethany was trying to keep Jamie safe, they didn't go out as often as they should, but even when they did venture out as a family, which had lately included Theo, Bethany was always on edge and people thought it was because of marital problems. After the morning they had, those writers couldn't have been more wrong. Bethany's book had been sent off to a publisher and was hopefully going to diffuse a lot of fire, not just on the couple, not just on the Avengers, but on SHIELD as well.
When the light turned green, Steve zoomed off quickly. It took him a moment to remember what he was doing, but the reminder only being because as he slowed down at another traffic light, his gaze turned to a car horn at the gas station across the street. As soon as the sound started, it stopped, but the damage had been done. He could see her standing there, clear as day.
Jen made no move to panic, just calmly going into the gas station as Steve waited impatiently for the light to change so he could move over there before he missed her altogether. "I see her," Steve said through his comm. "She just went into the gas station."
"There's multiple gas stations, Steve," Clint reminded him. "Send us your coordinates."
Steve looked down at the controls on the bike, quickly surveying them until he hit the right one. "I'll be there in five," Natasha replied. "Clint?"
"Later than that, I couldn't be farther," the archer recorded as the light turned green.
"I just see Jen," Steve explained as he quickly moved to the station. "We can't afford to miss this opportunity."
"Wait, Steve-" Natasha began, but he had already pulled out his earpiece, dismounting his bike. He had to get to Jen before Jacob made himself known, he had to convince her to come home without a confrontation. As much as they wanted to catch Jacob, they wanted to get to Jen first. They wanted her return home to be a choice. Using caution, he walked into the gas station, casually surveying the building. There was still no sign of Jacob, but Jen was in the last aisle, comparing the backs of two bags of chips. Carefully moving behind her, he tapped her shoulder.
When she turned around, her eyes went wide and Steve moved a finger up to his lips, asking her to stay quiet. "Steve-"
"I need to talk to you," Steve insisted.
"I have nothing to say," Jen responded, but shaky as if that was what she was told to say.
"Well I have plenty," Steve replied firmly, taking a hold of her elbow and dragging her to a corner. "What are you doing? Leaving your kid on the streets of New York-"
"He was outside the Tower," Jen interrupted hastily.
"That's still on the streets of New York!" Steve reminded her in a loud whisper. "It was hours before anyone realized he was out there. And then gone, no note, nothing. It's been two weeks and not so much as a word. Jacob is not worth it!"
"You're wrong," Jen whispered passionately. "He's not a bad guy. He's innocent!"
"And what? You're trying to clear his name?" Steve asked, receiving no answer. "But you won't be able to. It's been months since he was labelled a HYDRA member, Jen. If there was proof against our beliefs, you would have found them by now. We would have found them by now."
"I love him," Jen replied strongly.
"Even if he's guilty," Steve stated plainly. "Could you really start your life with him knowing what he stands for?"
Jen scoffed, disgusted at Steve. "You're a hypocrite, Rogers. You judge me for who I'm in love with and what he may or may not have done, but you're married to someone you know is guilty of countless crimes. Both lawful and against nature."
Steve was taken aback by the statement. It rang true, and he had no justification. While the sins were different, they held some equal merit. The only way Steve could think they were different was because she had changed, but even then, he was ready to forgive her before she made the right amends. "You'll never find proof of innocence," Steve began slowly. "You'll be on this run for the rest of your life. You're really going to leave Theo without his mother?"
"He was unhappy without you guys anyways," Jen cried, anger clear in her voice. "And now? He's happy, isn't he?"
Again, that took him aback. Despite that first day, the little boy hadn't complained about the circumstances. In fact, he seemed to love his new arrangements. And Steve and Bethany loved having him with them. It didn't change the fact that Jen was his mother and she had a responsibility. "So you don't care about him then?"
"Of course I do," Jen insisted, insulted. "That's why I left him with you two. I know you love him, and he loves you. He's always loved Bethany, even as a baby. Why have us both be unhappy together than happy and separate?"
"It's not right," Steve answered.
"It feels right," Jen promised. "I miss him, but I know he's safe. That he's happy. That he's with people who love him unconditionally."
"And what has Jacob said about all this?" Steve tested.
"Well, he wasn't impressed to begin with," Jen admitted. "In fact, he was against it but one day he changed his mind. Realized that I was right."
"Bethany doesn't want me to force you back home," Steve informed her. "She wants your return to be a decision you've made. But know that I can't let a HYDRA terrorist walk free."
"Steve, I'm begging you," Jen began, terror in her voice. "Just walk away. Let us live our life."
"I know he's close," Steve continued, ignoring her. "I don't want to use force, but if that's what it comes to-"
"He's ready for a fight," Jen revealed. "Please, Steve. Just walk away. This is for your own good. He may be innocent, but he's not ready to go without a fight."
Steve suddenly realized that if Jacob was nearby, he'd have seen Steve by now. And with Natasha and Clint nowhere in sight, her words of warning made him realize that this could be a trap. One that Jen was trying to warn Steve of. "Be honest, is this your own decision? Or are you being forced into this? I can't help you if you don't want it."
"This was my choice," Jen confirmed. "And I don't want him to hurt you, to hurt any of you. And he doesn't want to hurt anyone either, Steve. But he's trying to have a life despite it being robbed from him." He studied her carefully, watching as her sight quickly darted to outside, looking nervous. When Steve followed her gaze, Jacob was there.
Without a plan of attack, without any common sense or even thought, Steve quickly went after him. But as soon as he was outside, a loud explosion sounded from behind, heat rushing past him, the blast sending his body flying to the asphalt before everything went black.
**A/N: Hey, I did warn you.
Just a casual reminder about the poll. No pressure or anything :)
Jo: Basically, Bethany wants to be able to age with her family and Bruce is trying to help her, since he understands more than anyone. But since they both have experiences of "do now, ask later" and it turning out badly, they tested it on a limb in order to see what would happen. It failed, so good thing they tested it, but now they will be able to use the limb for testing so Bethany won't have to go through that again.
fallingforthecaptain: Well, I'm glad :) Good luck. I'm not reading any fanfictions right now (because of how busy I am) but I'm a huge Once Upon a Time fan and I also LOVE Sharon Carter, so keep working on those bad boys, and I'll be sure to leave them a review when I read them :) They all sound like something I'd be interested in :)
Guest: Thank you for the kind words and the... not so kind words. Either way, I do appreciate critism. The only thing I would advise for the future is telling me how I can fix what I'm doing wrong. Things like why are they unlikeable, how should Steve be portrayed in your opinion and what I can do to spark your interest again. Trust me when I say, I will not take recommendations as an insult, but a writing excerise, so please, if you have the time, shoot me a message or a review :) I'm not sure whether or not this will help get you excited, but I am planning on character revision at the beginning of the next story. It'll all fall into place, and even before that story, Steve is going to have some very... well, powerful things to say in regards to who he is as a person and who he wants to be. Nonetheless, things will change, as they always do. The general consensus is that people want Bethany to be a full time mother, only jumping into battle when the world is about to go to hell. Is that who Bethany was at the beginning of this story? HELL NO. But the entire reason I wrote her like that was to excerise character growth. And as you said, children change the way people are. What I'm getting at is; don't give up on me just yet! Help me in getting both Steve and Bethany into better positions individually as well as together.
FeliciaFelicis: Haha, she's trying hard! Keep your fingers crossed! I have an assignment due in two days and I've barely started and I'm not even afraid of the penalty for it being late, THAT's how busy school has been :$
Lunar678: I can't wait either, but I'm even more excited for Civil War! I know it hasn't started shooting yet, but WOOO. It's going to be amazing.
