AN: This chapter is dedicated to Rick O Shay for reminding me of a very important thing. And to Metroidvania, who is responsible for always bringing us back.

Chapter 53

In hindsight, Helena wondered whether she should simply have let Miranda go back to the Normandy. The evening was… strange. Alien. They had had a meal together, the three of them. Helena had sat in the breakfast nook with Rinn and Miranda, haunted by the feeling that the woman didn't really belong in their house. They had tried to make it safe for the two of them. Normal.

Miranda Lawson, second in command of the Normandy, sitting beside her somewhat squashed in by the lack of space that they had, was not normal. A part of her didn't even really understand what the woman was doing there. Yes, she had clearly come to see if she was alright, something Helena appreciated tremendously, but it felt out of place and out of character as if Miranda was forcing herself to do something she wasn't used to.

And, that was probably it. Miranda clearly wasn't used to this sort of interaction. She wasn't used to normal and confessed more than once that she didn't do normality well. Her conversations were rarely personal, always bordering on professional. Both Helena and Rinn had mentioned that they would have liked to study something, but didn't know how to go about it. Miranda had leapt onto the idea with a gusto that had surprised Helena and, in hindsight, she wondered whether it was simply something she was comfortable with discussing. Getting them into university or some form of tertiary institution was a process that she could help with.

Helena hadn't really meant it, or rather, she had been playing with the idea, but found any long term commitment to enrichment kind of futile as she knew that it was probably less an earth year before the reapers came.

And what a way to interrupt a syllabus.

But, on the other hand, it was good to see Rinn interact a little with Miranda, to watch her absorb everything the Cerbrus officer had said about assessment courses and revision programs that they could participate in. It was nice to watch her friend dream a little and Miranda put in the effort. She knew that it was very out of character for the woman, but she tried and that was what mattered.

They retired to the living room afterwards and, following some awkward channel browsing, chose a musical theatre type program to watch. Their love for music was the one thing all three of them had in common.

Sitting beside Miranda but not quite touching her because she was afraid that it would make Rinn more uncomfortable than she already was, Helena didn't really pay any attention to the program as her thoughts kept on returning to the day's events. Looking around her occasionally, especially towards Rinn who had taken the chair some distance from them, Helena suspected that they all had quite a lot on their mind. Rinn kept fidgeting and, a few minutes into the program, she jumped up startled when her omnitool beeped.

When she looked at it her eyes narrowed and she got up immediately.

"I have to take this," she said simply, a hint of a chill in her voice, as she retreated to her own room. Miranda shifted in her seat and followed her departure before she turned back to Helena with a puzzled expression on her face.

"And that is?"

Helena could only guess.

"Her boss," she said. "Or the next best bitch under him." She didn't even feel guilty when Miranda raised an eyebrow at her choice of language. "Rinn had been waiting for this call, she anticipated that they might not have liked how she handled dealing with a client's son. The lad was difficult and had put them in a dangerous situation."

Miranda was quiet, the voice in the other room becoming more obvious despite the closed door between them. Helena opened up the television's remote on her omnitool and increased the volume slightly though it didn't really help.

"Is she taking on more jobs?" Miranda asked slowly. "What is their aim?"

Snorting, Helena shrugged. "Who knows," she said. "I don't get it, Miranda. You have to talk to Liara about that." She listened to her friend argue for a moment, trying to justify her actions. "She's not theirs. I don't know if this is all a part of the training or anything, but she was never meant to work for them." Anger and frustration made her clench her teeth as she hissed. "She shouldn't be protecting me, Miranda."

She could tell that Miranda didn't agree, but they didn't get a chance to say anything when Rinn's door opened abruptly and she stormed out. She caught herself when their eyes turned to her looking like a deer caught in headlights. Helena shifted and sat up a little straighter as her friend's eyes met the floor.

"Trouble?" She spoke in Afrikaans, not looking at Miranda but feeling her shift beside her.

Rinn stared at the floor for a moment then grimaced and rubbed her neck. "Pretty much the expected response," she pointed out, also continuing in their mother tongue. "My handling of the client's son was not appreciated." She sighed again. "Dis pretty kak."

"I can imagine," Helena spoke quietly. "You look like you need a walk."

Rinn glanced up briefly. "Sal dit okay wees?"

Helena nodded, smiled and switched her conversation back to English. She knew it had been rude but then again, she wasn't sure whether Miranda had already loaded their language on her omnitool's universal translator.

"You can always bring back ice cream," she pointed out. "I'd like that. See if that little salarian has figured out what chocolate flavour is yet. And remember to ask if it has lactose in it. That way we know it is sort of milk at least." She gave Rinn a half smile, but her friend didn't respond. Rather, she shuffled from foot to foot and just nodded.

"Consider it done," she said softly. "I'll send a message if I get held up somewhere, but I won't be gone too long."

Helena waved her off and got up, retrieving Rinn's coat from the chair where she had dumped it when they came home. What a fucked up day, she thought miserably as she went to her friend and gently draped it over her shoulders, briefly increasing the pressure of her fingers as she did so.

"We're not in a rush," she said quietly. "Take the time you need."

Rinn's hand came up to touch hers, but stopped midway. Instead she pulled the coat around her and turned back, her smile and mask firmly set in place.

"Will do," she said. "Don't torment the guest, we get so few." She glanced past Helena at Miranda and inclined her head slightly, then headed for the door. Helena watched her leave, then sighed deeply and glanced back at Miranda. "Can I make you some coffee or something?" she asked quietly. The Cerberus officer had stood up and moved to the television to turn it down slightly, the musical for now, set aside.

"I have some wine in the bag," she pointed out. "We can go for that as well." She gave Helena a hopeful smile which the ginger returned.

"Sure," she said. "A glass of wine would be most welcome." Sometimes she was worried that she might turn into an alcoholic. She certainly drank more here than she had in the world before this one.

Miranda flowed up from the couch, visibly relaxing. "I will go and get it," she said and strode off to Helena's room.

Watching her go, Helena tried to breathe a little deeper, thinking that she owed it to Miranda to relax a little. She got two glasses ready for them, silently wishing for cheese and crackers.

My life was so different before.

"We just need to let it breathe for a second," Miranda advised when she returned, putting the wine on the kitchen counter and leaning against it, watching Helena as she brought the glasses closer. "It's from earth. Have you ever tried Kanonkop?" The name was mispronounced, but recognizable.

Helena paused, her chest aching as she remembered a wine tasting, no more than a year ago.

"I've heard of it," she breathed. "It is… very good they say." She reached out and picked up the bottle, studying the label and the year.

Somethings don't change.

She opened the bottle quickly, let it breath a bit then poured it out and gave Miranda her drink. Their fingers brushed lightly, though they made no move to touch each other yet.

"Then let us drink this glass on the day we would all rather forget," Miranda said and glanced at the door. "Has Rinn gone out for a drink?"

Helena shook her head. "Just a walk," she said. "Drinking's… sort of a moot point for her. She has to consume a lot to get drunk…" She trailed off. "We tested it one night." At Miranda's look she blushed. "I couldn't help myself. I had to know. It was a very controlled circumstance. And I kept an eye on her readings the whole time."

That had been one of the concerns that Rinn had raised when Helena was still trying to bully her into it. That she would somehow lose control of herself and become the hybrid. The opposite had proven true in the end. For the time that Rinn was sloshed, however short it had been, she had been pretty friendly.

Helena watched as Miranda shook her head and took a sip of her wine. "I'm pretty sure that there was nothing to be concerned about," she said levelly with a confidence that Helena sometimes wished that she felt. "I had thought that we would have more time here and had planned to bring her to the Normandy for a… check-up."

Service, Helena thought and took a sip of her own wine. They didn't move from the kitchen, but stood there in the now nearly silent apartment.

"What were you saying about Rinn's work?" Miranda asked. "Are you concerned about something?"

Helena… paused. She knew she had an answer. She knew she had the words. But suddenly… she didn't know whether she had the energy to deal with it. I'm scared of what they are teaching her. I'm scared of what they are expecting her to do. The unease that she had had to keep in line while in Katelyn's company spilled forth and, she suspected, threatened to cloud her judgement.

"I don't want to her to take a bullet for me, Miranda," Helena spoke quietly. "I've brought this up before, I believe. Rinn was never meant to be a body guard. Or a human shield. But, I can… almost justify that, you know? I am… scared enough of what is out there to realise that I might need a buffer." She sniffed and made a vague motion towards her shoulder. "Pain and perhaps my own confidence is stopping me from being able to help myself. That and the fact that Liara's mercenaries told her that I'm not allowed to carry a gun…" She watched Miranda's eyes and swiped a finger in her direction.

"You will refrain from commenting, Officer Lawson. If you value your life." Her ire didn't last long. In fact, it had never even been real. Helena's heart swelled when she realised that the brief flash of amusement, the brief light of teasing that came to Miranda's gaze was real.

"Anyway. Selfishly, I can almost close my eyes and look the other direction," Helena continued. "But – when they start expecting her to do it for other people? People not related to Liara at all? And then… Then seeing her struggle? I don't know. It's not right." She didn't look at Miranda as she felt the woman studying her.

"Do you think she should stop?"

Of course, Helena thought. That is the question.

"Yes," she said quietly. "But I don't think we can afford it. Not financially – I'm… going to have to be even more dependent on Dr T'Soni than I am now. I owe her… a lot. I owe the Normandy a lot. I… it's hard to explain Miranda. I think that she should stop. I think that she should tell those people to go and fuck themselves and find another gig. But I know she can't. I know it's dangerous. And I don't think Liara will let her. Or… we might have to pay back the money it took to train her. And me. I… I don't know." She sighed deeply. "I don't know, Miranda. We're doing what we can."

Miranda was quiet for a long time as she regarded her. She didn't approach her, nor did Helena want her to.

"You can come back to the Normandy," Miranda spoke quietly. "Liara would understand that."

Helena's stomach dropped immediately and it took all she had not to grimace. "I… don't think there are any spare beds," she said. "And I think sleeping in yours will be awkward with the crew." She smiled at her fondly, to try and make sure that Miranda didn't misread the statement. She had some difficulty placing the look of regret in Miranda's eyes. The apartment was silent for a few moments as they both struggled with themselves.

"Are you afraid of Katelyn?"

Yes.

Helena looked at Miranda and said nothing, too afraid that it might be a way of tricking her into revealing more than she felt comfortable with. What made her feel terrible was that, Miranda looked genuinely concerned.

"Helena, I know you two don't get on," she said softly. "But Katelyn won't hurt you. I won't…"

"Let her?" Helena finished the sentence that Miranda cut off abruptly. She took a slow sip of her wine, playing with the dark liquid in her glass. "That's the reason we can't go back because Rinn has told me exactly the same thing." It hurt to say it, because a part of her almost felt as if she was denying them a home. A real home.

"I don't want to put anybody in that situation until the commander and I can resolve our differences."

Miranda's face revealed nothing as she processed this but Helena noticed that she wasn't drinking her wine.

"And that is what you are doing now?" the dark haired woman asked. "That is why you brought Kasumi Goto into this? To gain favour? I think it carries its own set of risks Helena. You made mistakes today."

Alison Gunn.

Helena didn't break eye contact with Miranda as they weighed each other.

"It's more complicated than that," Helena whispered. "I believe that she can help. And that is the one thing I can ultimately do, what I can try to do. I can't be on the Normandy, but I can be here."

"Even if that means that Rinn has to continue going through the training you hate to see her do? Don't you think that she would do better, being closer to Katelyn?"

The last hurt just a little. I make choices for us, but are they the right ones?

"Rinn wouldn't want to be on the Normandy either," Helena spoke quietly then looked around the room that held the remnants of the life that she and Rinn were trying to build for themselves here. It felt very fragile.

Illium was hit harder than Earth, she thought. Will be hit harder than Earth. Everything here… Everybody… They will just be gone. Even Orca security. She took a steadying breath, the thought bitterly soothing until she remembered their receptionist downstairs. Chantal? She couldn't remember the asari's name and turned back to Miranda, feeling both defeated and calmer.

"There's no answer to this here," she said softly. "Not in this night. You will… be leaving in the morning, probably? Or the day after?"

Miranda looked at her a moment longer before she nodded. "Late tomorrow evening," she spoke quietly. "Depending on our scheduling. We should talk about it if it bothers you, Helena. If you have some kind of… gut feeling that this is the wrong course for Rinn then I trust you with it. I trust you."

The words were surprising, unexpected and they nearly made her cry.

You're the only one.

Helena nodded but looked away. "I just don't want to lose her," she whispered. "I can't bear losing… anything else. A life… Miranda. A whole life. And I already lost her in some ways. She is not who she was, not the way she was." She snorted and sighed. "I'm not who I was. I was happier, which made me... a better person." The tears threatened to flow, but didn't. "Or not happier, but… life was simpler. Now I just feel as if we both constantly need to do what we have to do to survive. And I don't even think we're succeeding in that."

It won't change anything, the world will still burn.

She could tell that Miranda was awkward with the subject, because it wasn't really in her realm of experience. This all bordered on a world that functioned with too much emotions.

"You did well today, Helena," she spoke quietly. "I know it was hard for you. And… about Rinn, I will talk to Katelyn. You're right, I can't change anything now. But I can talk to the commander; see if we… can't come up with anything better. And, talk to Liara. I… don't know what else to say."

Helena smiled at that, accepted it because it would have been exactly what she would have said if their positions were reversed. "Say that we can stop the musical theatre and just… relax. And spend time together, because I suspect that tonight is all we'll have for a while." She hesitated.

"I'll miss you, Miranda. I enjoyed it, that you were close. I'm sorry I'm not always good company."

She watched as Miranda's smile turned up a little, her eyes amused as she came closer to Helena and embraced her. It was a warm touch, comforting and it allowed Helena to breathe a little deeper for just a moment.

"Company that is always good, you have to pay for," the dark haired woman said. "This is real and I am happier with that."

Well, isn't this just a delightful, little fuck up?

Rinn sighed as the apartment door closed behind her. She wondered how bad it looked for Miranda, then wondered how much the two had heard of the argument.

Not a lot, she decided. Helena would have wanted to discuss it then and there.

She rubbed at her eyes. They were burning with anger, not unlike that which had gotten her into this mess. Her bloody temper. She shook her head and began walking, making her way first down the corridor and into the stairway.

One step at a time, one breath at a time, one moment at a time, she told herself.

Yulia had been livid – clearly having been on the receiving end of an equally irate Jachett. There hadn't been any word on whether Orcas would lose the contract, but Rinn had been promised, in no uncertain terms, that any loss would be coming out of her hide seeing as she wouldn't be able to help recover the funds any way else.

The hybrid shook the thought from her head, instead taking a moment to inhale and simply be. She allowed her surroundings to become clearer in her mind. Every angle, every line in was vivid in her sight. The scents of tired bodies and stale air filled her nostrils. Her skin noticed a slight shift in temperature pockets. She focused on the here and now in a way she could only do with her enhanced senses as she descended the stairs at a rate that she wouldn't have risked in the world before. While she didn't leap off steps or attempted wall runs, she felt herself tempted to do so. She wanted to escape the confines of civil limitation. Her body buzzed with the knowledge that she could do just that, that she had the innate potential now. She wondered whether free runners felt this way at times.

She flowed around those pedestrians going up and down the steps as though they weren't there at all, but some curses followed her down from a particularly startled turian. Soon she noted ground floor approach and she slowed her pace, her vision shifting with it as everything became normal again.

Rinn exited to the main foyer, her eyes sweeping the area in drilled habit, but she halted quickly as a form appeared right on the other side of the door. Crystal blue eyes met hers from but a few steps away and the asari gave a small yelp as she too stopped to avoid collision.

"Goddess," Chenee breathed, then gave a tremulous smile. "That was close."

"Sorry," Rinn apologised, not that there was any real need, but the habit to do so was there. "Are you alright?" she asked, studying the asari who seemed to have received a genuine fright from the encounter.

"Yes," Chenee replied, her hand still on her heart. "I just wasn't expecting anyone to come out right at this moment." She dropped her hand. "Hey, Rinn." The asari's smile seemed surer as she spoke Rinn's name. "You going out?"

"Yeah," Rinn nodded. "Need some fresh air… and ice cream."

"A perfect combination," the asari grinned. "Are the others coming?"

"Uh, no. They're happy to stay in."

"Oh," Chenee paused studying Rinn. "Would you like some company? I don't have anything planned and I could do with just getting out of the building for a bit."

"Uh… sure," Rinn said with very little conviction.

"You can say no, y'know," the asari added with a smile.

The woman shook her head. "It's not that I don't want you to come. I was just… the place is far and I was planning on walking. And I know you're not one for ice cream." So there's nothing in this journey that should seem inviting. "You might not find it all that fun."

"I'm sure we can find some reward for me along the way," Chenee replied with an amused glint in her eye. "Give me ten minutes to get into something more comfortable than this uniform?"

"Okay," Rinn replied and watched the asari head up the steps at a brisk pace. "Remember to put on some walking shoes," she added, then activated her omnitool and messaged Helena the change in plan.

Time had slipped away from them, moving in a strangely comfortable void. Miranda had surprised herself, because she had truly meant what she told Helena. That she was happier with spending time with her when they weren't trying to pretend that everything was alright and simply existing in some semblance of truth. They returned to the television, moving to a movie that required very little thought to follow. They had sat apart at first, until Miranda gently and silently coaxed the woman to lean and sit against her. This soon became an embrace, a kiss or two which finally allowed them to relax together. Comfortable with Helena pressed against her, Miranda had held her as she felt her breathing change, subtly shifting from engaged to passive. Her body relaxed and soon it became apparent that she was asleep.

Time stretched out, the movie ended and she was left alone with her thoughts, returning to all that Helena had said, how she had coached Katelyn and Kasumi through what they needed to know.

It was… frightening in a way, knowing that she couldn't explain it.

But we can, if I just hand her over…

The thought couldn't take purchase in her mind. Miranda closed her eyes and brought her head closer to Helena's. Before she could master herself, she found her hand protectively enclose the other woman's head, her fingers brushing through Helena's hair. It was longer now and beginning to look quite unruly. A part of Miranda hoped that the ginger wouldn't cut it again. She brought her face closer to the curling strands and breathed in, taking in the smell of soap and with an undertone of another smell that she could only describe as Helena's. It was a nice combination and it made her smile, though not for long.

What are you doing? Where do you think this will end?

Her thoughts were harsh suddenly, like a voice outside of herself calling her to heel.

You have a job to do. Never forget that.

There was a soft peep from the door and a noise that sounded like someone struggling with something mechanical. Miranda pushed herself up slightly, her hand reaching for the small handgun she kept strapped to her ankle. When she saw a familiar head and figure come through, she relaxed a little and shifted her hand so that it would cover Helena's open ear.

Rinn had her head down as she entered, shrugging out of her coat and leaving it and her shoes by the door. She looked better than when she had left, her cheeks flushed red with cold and she moved to the kitchen to deposit a container into the freezer. Coming back into the living room she hesitated when she saw Miranda looking at her.

Miranda made sure to smile at her when she spoke. "Cleared your head?"

The younger woman hesitated, her gaze peeping over the couch until she saw her friend's head resting on Miranda's chest.

"Uh, yeah." She said and looked away. "Met a friend along the way. Delayed the ice cream. Sorry." It had been close to three hours since she had left. Miranda dismissed her apology with a smile and shook her head.

"That sounds better though," she said, still keeping her voice soft, knowing that the husk's hearing would be able to pick it up. "Meeting a friend. Feeling better?"

Rinn looked troubled, but she nodded slowly, her gaze slowly returning to her friend. "It's just been… a difficult day. All round." She looked pained as she studied the sleeper. "You two doing okay?"

Miranda wasn't sure how to answer that. "We are," she said finally. "Thank you for… letting me in, Rinn. I know that it was a tough day on the both of you. It is… difficult sometimes then, to have someone else in the mix." Especially someone with no experience with this kind of situation.

Rinn's eyes jumped to Miranda's for the briefest of moments. "You're not in the way," she said and turned back to her friend. "And it seems she likes to have you here. I've… never seen her this close to anybody." Her cheeks coloured as she looked away. "Not that she hasn't had partners, she's just always been very private about it." Rinn blew out a slow breath, steering her own conversation away from a topic that was clearly starting to make her uncomfortable. "You speak to her in a language I can't."

It was strange, but that statement made Miranda ache. She tightened her hand around Helena's head involuntarily, wondering what had made her decide to let her in. When she realised that she needed to speak, she tried to hide her thoughts with a smile. "It's hard to tell with her sometimes," she said honestly and made sure to meet Rinn's gaze again. "Do you think that she can… deal with what has been happening?" She watched as the question made the hybrid's mouth drop open slightly. "Can you?"

Rinn stood very still as she thought about this. Miranda could see her mouth move slightly as she struggled to find the words to an answer that was potentially very important. At some point, she gave Miranda a very pointed look and turned around with the promise to return clear in her eyes. She went into the kitchen, turned on the kettle – probably out of habit – and went to the fridge to retrieve the container that she had brought in. She put out two bowls, but Miranda silently waved her off, not wanting ice cream in that moment simply because she didn't know how she was going to eat it with Helena still sleeping on her chest. The clairvoyant had not stirred, but slept soundly, her one hand resting on Miranda's clavicle.

"Our backgrounds are very different, she and I," Rinn whispered finally as she returned to the living room with a bowl of ice cream. She move within Miranda's line of vision and leaned against the closest wall. "Considerably, in ways." She dropped her gaze and stirred her ice cream, not yet committing to eating it. "We have things in common too in how we grew up and how life has taken us. One of those things is that we both learnt that, it doesn't matter whether we are able." She shrugged and took a bite. "We just have to be. There is no alternative. If there were, I would have said: No we're not. We weren't able to deal with the lives we had before. We weren't able to deal with the mine, with the base, with anything." She put her spoon back into the bowl and stirred.

"But, we have to, so that is just how it is." She looked at Helena, her eyes a little harder than Miranda expected. "She wouldn't have started this if she didn't feel the same. It would have been easier simply to say nothing."

Looking at her, the Cerberus officer was aware of a conflict inside her. The need to understand what was happening versus the feeling that she should help. She looked at Helena, breathing in the smell of soap and nicer things.

"Do you need me to find an alternative for you?"

Rinn stopped mid bite and made eye contact before she looked at her ice cream again. "I don't think you can," she said honestly. "Dr T'Soni's care makes the most sense. I can't see Katelyn entrusting us to anyone else, can you?"

Still acutely aware of the other woman's breathing Miranda tried hard to judge whether she was still asleep or not. Closing her eyes and listening, she decided that it was the former.

"We trusted Liara to make your decisions, Rinn," Miranda whispered into Helena's hair. "To provide this option for you. I'm not convinced it's the right one. Not after what I saw tonight, or what she said. I don't think Helena likes what you do."

Rinn didn't ask what they spoke about, but seemed to accept that a conversation happened and that she was in the middle of it. Instead she looked at Helena a sense of hopelessness returning to her. "I don't like how exposed she is," she whispered. "But I don't think she'll sit back and let life happen. Not if she can help it." The way she said it made Miranda shiver and for a moment, she felt Helena stir against her.

"Let life happen?" She whispered, with terrible visions of a future loss in her head. Rinn didn't exactly sooth her fears when she replied.

"She wants to be involved. Wants to help. Doesn't want to be side-lined for anything. You saw how much she did with this Kasumi woman. How much she gave today. This cost her a lot, Miranda." The last was with a hint of warning.

Don't hurt her.

"Why is it so important?" Miranda asked. "Not just Kasumi, but all of it. You must know, I don't think you would have indulged her all of this if you didn't."

Rinn gaze was dark and bitter when she spoke. "Isn't it obvious? Isn't it something that we all know? The reason you brought a woman back to life. The reapers are coming and in the end, they will destroy all of us. And, despite whatever makes Katelyn and Helena not see eye-to-eye, Helena desperately wants us to survive. Which means giving the Normandy every advantage she at least is able to give. I find myself unable to stand in the way of that particular desire. So, I'm just trying to keep her safe despite it all. No matter what cost I have to pay. I don't presume to think that I am solely capable of doing so, but… I have to do something. And, that is why I need to be with Orcus. No matter how mad they make me."

And why I am here, seducing a woman I am starting to care about. Miranda looked at Rinn and realised that the woman saw that she understood. That she grasped what she was saying.

I cannot move you from here. I cannot find an alternative. You're right.

Sighing, Miranda resisted the urge to kiss Helena's forehead in silent apology for what she was doing. "I guess it's the way we all feel," she said quietly. "That we have to do something. No matter what… the consequences." She suspected that Rinn picked up on her mood because she shifted slightly, her stance becoming more aggressive.

"She has to survive, Miranda. She has to." Her features became pained. "Both she and Katelyn."

Nodding slowly, Miranda could feel a change in Helena's body and wondered whether she was beginning to wake up. She spoke quickly, in a hurried whisper – hoping that Helena wouldn't hear.

"I haven't forgotten my promise to you, Rinn. I will keep her safe, as much as I am capable. I will keep her safe."

The tension drifted away between them as Rinn nodded slowly, sighing softly as if she was letting go of a breath that she had been holding for a long time.

"Thank you," she whispered and shifted. "That is all I ask. I'm ahm… going to bed. Tell her I said good night."

Still trying to judge Helena's state of consciousness, Miranda motioned to Rinn to wait. "Can you help me get her to bed?" She asked. "Or should I just wake her?"

The darkness that slipped into Rinn's gaze was all too familiar. She saw it in her crew's eyes sometimes, the loss of remembered deeds from the Collectors' base. And then she remembered the video of the hybrid half carrying Helena out of the Normandy. Remembered the delightful anticipation that was on the husk's features as she thought of whatever dark deeds she was about to perform.

"Just wake her," Rinn whispered. "It's… more comfortable." She realised that Miranda saw too much in her and hid it with a half-smile. "Besides, you can tempt her with ice cream. Even coffee, she can drink it and still sleep. Lucky bitch."

Miranda smiled and shifted her hand to Helena's shoulder, squeezing it to assist her to consciousness.

"Lucky indeed," she whispered but knew that somehow, tonight, Helena didn't feel that way.