Chapter 53

In her hotel room Louise opened her carpet bag and rummaged inside, trying to find a clean, dry handkerchief. The bag was almost empty since she had unpacked her clothes and hung them in the wardrobe as soon as she had arrived in St. Joseph a couple of days ago. Her hand came into contact with some soft material, but as she picked the object up, its weight told her that it was not the handkerchief she was looking for.

Curious, Louise lifted what her hand had grabbed to her eyes. It was a velvety, red pouch, and recognition dawned on her immediately. It was the gift that Kid had given her a few weeks ago the day after Doritha had barged into their lives. Back in those days she thought he had bought the present out of guilt or even pity so Lou had been so jealous and irritated that she had never bothered to find out what it was. Now curiosity got the better of her, and she opened the pouch.

Inside the velvety bag Louise discovered a couple of beautiful tortoiseshell combs. "He remembered," Lou whispered as she stared at two objects in the palm of her hand with wide open eyes. The night of the social she had mentioned her intention to buy a pair of combs as her hair had grown considerably, and Kid had obviously remembered that conversation. This was so thoughtful of him, actually the best gift she had ever received. Her father had always lavished her with expensive presents when he was in a generous mood, but Kid's small gift meant more to her than all those luxuries together. It showed how special he was, and as once again the realization of how much she had lost hit her, tears started to pool in her eyes.

Irritated, Louise furiously wiped the tears with the back of her right sleeve. What the heck was wrong with her? Lately all she did was cry, weep and sob in every way and fashion. Everything made her teary, especially when she thought of Kid. Why did he have to be this sweet and lovely? Why couldn't he be more like her father's friends? If he were a selfish, arrogant, cruel, insensitive moron, it would be easier for her to hate him, because that was what she wanted. She wanted to hate his guts, and wish him ill because that way she wouldn't be hurting so much as she was now.

Louise sighed audibly as she sank down on the bed. Hopefully, things would be easier with the pass of time, or at least that was what she told herself. Kid was her past, and she needed to think of him as a nice memory, that's all. Now she had to focus on herself, because she had nobody else. No one could say where she was heading and where she might be tomorrow and any other day after that. The future lying before her was uncertain, but that did not mean she had to be miserable for the rest of her days.

When Lou had arrived in St. Joseph two days ago, she had sent a message to her father through one of his employees she had found at the saloon. Lou could well have gone straight to the house her father owned a few miles from town, but she knew that if she set foot in the place she had called home for the last seven years, she would not be able to get out of there. So for her own security it was better she meet her father in a public place. In the message Louise had told him that her marriage was broken, and she needed to see him. That had been two days ago, and Lou had not heard from him yet.

As Louise thought how unlike her father this long wait was, a knock sounded at the door. The unexpected rapping almost made her jump out of her skin, and she started feeling very nervous. "One… one moment," she called in a trembling voice as she rose from the bed and put the combs back into her carpet bag, which she hid under the bed. Her hand smoothed out the creases on the quilt, and then she darted to open the door. Yet, she stopped again. There was no way to know what her father might have in store for her. He must surely be furious, and as soon as she opened the door, he might perfectly give her a strong shove, knock her down, and show her how terribly angry he was. She should well expect the worst, so she better be ready for his usual ways.

Standing in the middle of the room, Lou looked around, trying to locate something she could use to defend herself against the man who had fathered her. This time she would not let him trample over her without a fight. As her eyes scanned the room, there was another couple of knocks at the door. "One moment! Coming…" she said loudly as she grabbed the stoker from the fireplace rack, and shot towards the door.

Her left hand squeezed the handle of the stoker tightly as her right hand turned the knob, and opened the door. To her utter surprise, a different face appeared before her, and she stared totally agape at the person she had thought she would never see again. "K… Kid?" she croaked flabbergasted, not quite believing what she was seeing.

"Hi, Lou," the rider whispered as relief washed over him. During the whole ride he had been worried he might not find Lou, and when the receptionist had confirmed his wife was in the hotel, a huge weight had been taken off his shoulders.

"What… what are you doing here?"

"May I come in?" he asked. Louise nodded, moving aside to let him enter. Lou closed the door behind him, replaced the stoker in the fireplace rack and turned her questioning eyes to him, expecting an answer. Kid realized just then that he had not actually thought about what to tell her when the moment arrived. His whole self had been totally focused on finding her, and now that she was in front of him, he was at a loss. "Lou…"

"What?"

"I've come here because… because… because… because…"

"For goodness' sake, Kid! Spit it out!" Louise urged him, irritated by his indecision.

Kid took a deep breath, and clumsily blurted out, "Lou, you lied to me."

"What?" Lou exclaimed with a confused frown.

"I know the truth. You don't have the money you claimed you have!" Kid replied a bit too passionately.

His accusation naturally did not sit well with Louise. "That's none of your business!" Lou barked loudly, reacting harshly to hide the shame she was actually feeling at being found out. "What I have or don't have is just my concern! You shouldn't be here in the first place! So leave me alone and go back to your precious girlfriend!"

"Lou…" Kid tried in a softer tone and his hand reached out for her.

"Don't touch me!" Lou cried, swatting his hand off her shoulder as if his touch seared her skin. When her eyes met his dejected ones, she sobered, realizing she had overreacted again. Her face fell, and she walked to the bed on which she sank down. Directing her gaze to her lap, she said, "Kid, I didn't lie to you… well, not completely. What I told you about my mother's money is true. I'm supposed to inherit it when I turn twenty-one. Yet, I hope to reach an agreement with my father. He's the executor, and might give me the money in advance."

Kid stared at her skeptically. "And do you really believe he'll give you the money? Just like that?"

"Well, I have an ace up my sleeve which might help my cause," Lou replied, smiling coyly.

"What ace, Lou?"

Louise shook her head. "That's my secret."

The rider sighed. He was tired of secrets and half-truths. Because of his own reluctance to let things in the open, Lou had left Rock Creek and Doritha had almost taken her place. Kid admitted he had made too many mistakes, and this was his very last chance. "Lou," he continued softly as he sat down on the bed next to her, "why do you feel you need to do this? I told you I'd help you, and I don't understand why you have to resort to your father. The house in Rock Creek is yours, and I would never allow you to suffer difficulties. You're not alone. You have me."

"Kid, you're very sweet, but I ain't your responsibility anymore," Louise replied with a sad smile. "You needn't worry about me."

"How can I not worry about my wife? What kind of husband do you think I am?"

Lou smiled again even though Kid was obviously dead serious about his words. "You're such a nice person. I have to say Doritha's a very lucky girl for having you."

Kid kept quiet for a second, digesting what she had said, and then he added, "I'm not sure how lucky she is, but that has nothing to do with me."

Aware that there was something more to his words, Louise frowned and asked, "What do you mean by that?"

"Lou, you got the wrong idea about me and Doritha. There's nothing going on between us… nothing at all, I told you."

"But… but you love her," Lou said, her face contorted into an expression that showed her shock and disconcertion.

"I… I loved her, that's true, but somehow things have changed for me. She's just a friend."

"You mean you ain't gonna marry her?" Lou asked incredulously. Kid shook his head, and the young woman could not help but let out a sonorous 'oh'. "So… so… so she's just a friend?" she asked again to double check she had heard right. Kid nodded, and Louise insisted, "A friend like me?"

"No, Lou, not like you."

Louise stared at him, wondering what he had meant by his last sentence, but he did not seem ready to elaborate, and she did not dare to ask. The pair remained in awkward silence. Kid was not sure how to raise the next part of his plan whereas Louise was still trying to process all the information she was receiving all of a sudden. "Lou, you know something?" Kid finally broke the ice. Louise tilted her head, motioning him to continue, "When I was riding, I kept thinking about everything we have shared during all these months."

"Really?" Louise said. It was odd because she had been doing the same since the moment she had left Rock Creek behind.

Kid nodded and continued, "One particular moment keeps popping into my mind. You know which?"

"The social?" she ventured. That was the memory she kept replaying over and over again.

Kid smiled in agreement. "That was a pretty special night even if I clumsily stepped on your poor feet."

"That was nothing," Louise replied, feeling light-hearted all of a sudden as if all her problems had vanished.

"I have to say that apart from trampling on your feet, there's something more I regret."

"What?" Lou asked urgently.

"Not doing this as it should be done." And to Lou's surprise, Kid placed his hand at the nape of her neck, and brought her lips to his. Unlike that night weeks ago, his kiss now was unmistakably passionate, strong and hot. Kid put all his heart into showing in a very expressive way how much she meant to him. Likewise, once Louise got over the initial shock, she found herself following his lead and responding to his ardent kiss.

When Kid pulled away a few minutes later, Lou was breathless and disconcerted. His blue eyes bored into hers, and suddenly, she could clearly read what he was not saying, and her whole body trembled from head to toe. In the same way Kid was still shaken after their mind-blowing kiss, but he managed to find his own voice, "You can now slap me, scream, or kick me out of here. I had to do it, Lou. I needed to kiss you… maybe for just this time, but I was dying here to do it."

Louise heard him, completely shocked because she would not have expected this in a million years. For a few seconds she stared at him agape, and a terrible longing for feeling his kisses again took hold of her whole self. Before she knew what she was doing, her mouth found his passionately. Locked into each other, they fell on the bed, kissing fervently as if there was no tomorrow. Lou felt that she had no control or will over herself anymore. Her body was on fire, and she was not sure what strange force drove her to move, act and feel this way. All she knew was that she could not stop.

"Oh Lou…" Kid breathed among kisses. "I love you so much, and I want to be so much more than your friend. I really want to be your husband in every sense."

"Please kiss me… kiss me," she begged him, grabbing him by the shirt front and pulling him to her again.

Kid smiled and happily complied. His hands roamed over her back, and even though his senses were intoxicated and numb, he tried to restrain himself. He had made too many mistakes with Lou, and now that things seemed to lead in the right direction, he would not blow this chance by rushing her.

Suddenly, Kid felt her hands travel up his chest and struggle to undo his shirt buttons. Surprised by her forwardness, Kid took her hands in his and managed to say, "Lou… that… that's not…"

Louise felt her cheeks flush in humiliation as she became aware of what she was doing, and to make matters worse, Kid was stopping her. A lady would never behave so brashly, and now Kid got to realize what kind of person she was. "I… I… I'm sorry. I thought… I thought you wanted this," she stuttered, ducking her head because she felt unable to meet his eyes.

Kid placed a finger under her chin and made her look up, cursing himself for his clumsiness and embarrassing her. "Lou, what I want doesn't matter. I love you and I don't want you to feel we have to jump to… to… this. You mean the world to me, and… and… and I'd love to show you that properly… and court you."

Louise smiled, relieved to realize she had no reason to feel ashamed. Kid was not refusing her, but behaving like the gentleman he was. "Court me? We've had over ten months' courtship!" she exclaimed.

"Yes… in a way that's true."

"And we never had a wedding night," Louise reminded him.

"Yes, but that doesn't mean you should feel forced to do something just for my sake. I don't want you to think I'm just a grabber, or that I'm just looking for… that."

"Yes, I know. You let me know the very first night we were alone after we got married," Louise replied among giggles. "Actually, you thought I was the grabber. What did you tell me? Oh yes. 'No funny business, Ma'am'." Louise laughed at the memory while Kid blushed, uneasy at remembering what a jackass he had been when he had first met Louise. "Kid, don't you think I know what you're like by now? I want this too, and I love you," she finished the last sentence of her speech in a whisper while running her index finger down his chest.

Kid smiled at her shy declaration of love, feeling his chest swell with happiness and emotion. "Lou, are you sure?"

"I've never been so sure about anything else before."

Kid stared into her eyes in total awe, hardly believing this was actually happening for real. His wife loved him which was the best gift life could give him. All his dreams materialized in the woman before his eyes. He wanted to love her till the end of the world, and this was just the beginning of their magic story. So as their lips joined together once again, they sealed and confirmed the start of a union that would continue all night long and every single night after that.