Chapter 50 – Telling the Boss

It was the day of the scan, both Elizabeth and Henry were excited yet nervous. Elizabeth had decided not to inform Conrad or anyone else yet, she wanted to be sure of dates, and come to him with a plan of when she would take maternity and when she would return.

She was downstairs making herself and Henry a drink waiting for him to join her. They were having the scan at a private clinic that state/white house staff used. She was surprised that Russell hadn't questioned her about the appointment that was made yet, she distinctly remembered him telling her 'nothing gets by me'.

'Are you ready babe?' Henry asked walking down the stairs.

'Yep, I've made coffee' she smiled handing him a cup.

'I didn't think you could have caffeine when pregnant?' He asked

'Ok Henry, ground rules, I will look after myself and my body, I will take vitamins, try and stay off the take outs and be healthier, I will not drink alcohol, but I cannot cut back on caffeine, I won't be able to function' She warned, she didn't meant to be abrupt but she didn't need a lecture

'Babe I was only asking, but ok that sounds fair enough to me' He smiled and kissed her on the cheek.

'Come on, let's go and see Mini McCord' he teased and she immediately calmed and smiled.

As they sat in the back of her SUV they began dreaming of their life with a little one running around

'Do you want a boy or a girl?' Elizabeth asked

'Happy and healthy is all that matters, but I guess I'd like one of each' He smiled

'Well let's hope it isn't twins' she laughed nervously

'No I meant one day I'd like another' he held her hand

'Let's enjoy this one first, we don't know what our future holds' she reasoned, she was also pragmatic

'What about you? Girl or boy?' He asked her

'Hmm, Boy I think, no Girl, No a boy' she screwed her face up trying to decide causing Henry to laugh as the car pulled to a stop.

'Were here' called frank

'Let's go' He took hold of her hand and stepped out, they were thankful that the clinic was private, it meant no press were around and they only scheduled one staff member at a time so no chance of bumping into anyone else.

Elizabeth was led on the hospital bed awaiting the doctor to enter the room, her body engulfed with nerves, up until now she was replying on a bit of urine on a stick, what if she got this all wrong? She took a few deep breaths to compose herself as the doctor returned

'Hi Madam Secretary, Dr McCord, I am Consultant Matthews, I'll be your point of contact throughout your pregnancy, now let's get you scanned, see how far along you are and then we can work out any details or questions from there' He looked between them both and smiled

Elizabeth gently lifted her shirt up and unbuttoned her trousers, she felt weird, unbuttoning her trousers for another man, it wasn't in that context but the uncomfortable sensation it was giving her made her mind switch to Henry for a moment of two, How did he feel so comfortable sleeping with someone else? I can't stand this man touching my tummy to find the baby. How could he do that? He couldn't have loved me as much as he claimed. Stop it Elizabeth that was over a year ago now. Concentrate.

'Elizabeth' Henry called looking at his wife concerned, he'd called her twice prior to this

'Urm, yeah sorry what?' She asked jolting from her thoughts, embarrassed by what she was thinking she couldn't look at Henry straight in the eye.

'Look babe' He smiled and nodded to the screen.

And there it was, a tiny little baby, inside her stomach. She could see the head and an arm, tears pricked into her eyes. She was pregnant, she was going to be a mother.

'Wow' she whispered

'So I've taken some measurements and you're 14 weeks and 1 day, so a little overdue your first scan but so far so good' the Doctor smiled

'I'll have two images printed for you both and then we can go over questions' He stated exiting the room to get a plastic sheath to present the images in.

'Babe are you ok? You got a bit lost there' he chuckled a little

'Hmm, yeah fine' she lied. Henry knew she was lying but decided now wasn't the time to press further.

'Here you go, now the only thing I want to mention right now, is you're due date is February 14th and also, for you to be mindful of stress Madam Secretary and the harm it can have on you and the baby' He smiled sympathetically

'Well I don't think I can eliminate stress' she laughed wiping the gel off her tummy

'No, but I urge you to consider preventative measures, especially in the early stages like now and in the later stages, perhaps delegate a bit more'

'I'll consider it' she replied back quickly not wanting to be told how to look after herself and her unborn child.

'Ok, well I will send you appointment details for your next scan, it will be roughly 3 weeks time'. He spoke

'Thank you Dr Matthews' Henry shook his hand and they left the clinic heading to the white house.

'Babe what's the matter?' Henry asked her as they sat back in the SUV

'How could you do it?' She asked, getting more and more wound up by her intrusive thoughts

'Do what?' He asked confused

'Have another women's hands on you, I hated him touching me then' she looked at him, a mixture of emotions flooding her.

Henry sighed deeply, he knew she was having difficulty fully letting go of the past. He couldn't blame her he just wished it never happened. He only had himself to blame.

'Elizabeth can we talk about this when we're home?' he asked, knowing her security details could hear everything in the front of the SUV. Not that they didn't always remain professional and have discretion, but he still felt uncomfortable.

'How could you ignore it Henry?' she asked, the question did really make sense but she didn't feel like anything made sense, her hormones were all over the place.

'Is that what you were thinking in there when you went silent?'

'Yes, and Henry what if every time someone touches my bump or has to scan me, or internally scan me...' she paused took a breather and continued...

'Henry I'm not angry about what you did, I've pasted that and I know you won't do it again but what if every time someone touches me I think of you and her' she started to cry a little

'Then you tell me and we will work through it, babe maybe this is something you need to also discuss in therapy?' He approaches with caution

Elizabeth chose not to respond to that. Unsure if she agreed with his statement about therapy or not. She just held his hand and looked out the window, reassuring him she was ok, but also signalling she wasn't that ok.

The rest of the journey was taken in silence but they remained holding hands, Henry placed his spare hand on her tiny bump, so tiny it was pretty much invisible. She smiled at the contact, she did love him, she just wished this part of him didn't get to her still. She found out he cheated on her nearly a year ago now, and he hid it for 10 months, so in her head it should all be forgotten and she felt stupid for letting it creep in from time to time. They eventually arrived at the White House and both headed inside. They were walking towards Russell's office when Elizabeth turned to Henry

'Henry, I think this needs to come from me, you go to your office and I'll find you when I'm done' she stated and walked off before he had a chance to protest. He headed for his office, well a desk he called his office, it was where he worked from when working as the ethical advisor to the president and otherwise he had an office, rather a classroom of his own at the war colleague still.

'Hi Russell, any chance of a word with you and the president please' Bess asked entering his office.

'everything ok?' he quizzed

'Yeah' she replied nervously

'Elizabeth I know you was at the clinic this morning, I was waiting for you to approach me' He trailed off looking at her

'Nothing gets by you right? I'm fine can we chat?' She was a little annoyed at Russell, nonetheless he lead the way to the oval office.

'Hi Mr president, Secretary McCord needs a moment of our time' Russell asked entering the room.

'Mr president' She greeted him entering the office, she felt nervous, she didn't know why, she was an adult, she was a wife, and she was entitled to have children.

'Morning Bess' Conrad smiled, he was very fond of her.

'I am going to cut to the chase, Sir Henry and I have some news, I'm pregnant' she had a whole speech planned but froze, she said it out loud to someone, not just someone, her boss the president of the United States.

'Congratulations Bess, that's wonderful' he smiled and hugged his friend and she was immediately relieved of all her stress.

'Congratulations, for a minute there I thought you were dying' Russell joked causing both Conrad and Bess to roll their eyes.

'I'm 14 weeks, due in February so I was planning to take my leave the 7th Feb., 1 week before the baby arrives and I'll return around the begging of April if not before? That will be roughly 4/6 weeks off, Henry and I discussed this last night and he is going to take a break from teaching when the baby arrives, but continue working alongside you seen as he does most of the paperwork at the house anyway, so he will then have the baby' She didn't know why she went into that much detail about their plans, she just put it down to being overwhelmed.

'Bess that is more than ok with me, If you're sure, we're happy to work around you' Conrad smiled

'I mean all of this is pending you being re elected because I might not even have a job if not, but I think that you will, what I mean is' she was rambling and fiddling with her fingers

'Bess you're rambling, how many coffees have you had this morning?' Russell laughed

'Sorry I'm just overwhelmed I haven't told anyone else yet, not even my staff' she flapped taking a seat.

'Russell can you give us a minute' Conrad asked

'Now Bess I'm asking as a friend not your boss; what is going on?' He noticed her slightly distressed look on her face

'It's just Henry, well not him personally, with everything that has happened I am struggling to move past it, I have forgiven him and I do not believe he will do anything to hurt me again, but every now and then these thoughts creep in, I can't help it' She sighed, she decided being honest was better than lying to her boss.

'You're made for one another, true love knows no time limit, the First Lady and I were together 3 months before Harrison was born, now look he's 19 and we're stronger than ever. He loves you, I think you've other thought this.' Conrad reasoned with her

'Thanks sir; I needed to hear that.' she was feeling more reassured hearing a close friend be honest with her

'We cannot change the situation but we can change how we respond' He quoted. And Elizabeth knew he was right, she committed herself to Henry, she cannot punish him by bringing his past up constantly, she'd made difficult decisions as a CIA analyst and gave into things she wish she didn't and he has not once used it against her, or ever brought it up. She vowed from now forward she would do the same.

'Bess going back to earlier, I meant what I said, I'll be guided by you on this, if things are too much or you cannot take trips you let me know, I'm not having Henry on my case again after Iran' he laughed and Elizabeth smiled, she recalled Henry and Russell telling her about his outburst.

'Of course sir' She smiled standing up.

'Oh and Bess let me know when you're announcing the pregnancy, also don't forget campaigning starts in a few days, you owe me two weeks' he winked and she rolled her eyes laughing

'I am on my way to tell the staff now, the announcement will be soon, maybe today or tomorrow, this isn't something I can hide for long' She flashed him a smile and headed to Henry's office, before leaving together to go to her office. She explained what had just been discussed and also apologised for calling him out in the SUV earlier.