Chapter 50
(the present day, 4:45pm)
Back at the warehouse, Candace, Jeremy and Ron were still chained to the metal tables. Also, Mayor Sash was still strapped to the metal chair that led to DNAmy's improved genetic zipper.
"You are insane, Amy!" Candace yelled at the demented genetecist. "You will never get away with this!"
"Now come on, Kimmie!" Amy grinned, "In just a mere five minutes, Mayor Sash will be transformed into one of the ugliest CuddleBuddies that there is in existence, a Rakunk!"
"A Rakunk?!" Candace asked.
"A combination of a sewer rat and with the tail of a skunk, Kimberly!" Amy described the Cuddlebuddy, still under the assumption that it was Kim.
"Eww!" Ron shouted with disgust, "I so wouldn't want to go near that stuffed animal!"
Amy continued to ramble, "And also, my satellite dish..."
"You mean the one you stole and rewired?" Candace interrupted her again.
"Yes, Kimmie! I not only rewired it but also uploaded the genetic information of all the animals in the Animal Kingdom! Think about it! Cuddlebuddies of all shapes and sizes, adoring me! As I said before, I will be the only human left on this planet because of my protective vest!" She again pointed to her protective Genetic Zipping vest that would shield her from the effects of her machine.
"She really has one twisted mind!" Jeremy exclaimed.
"Duh, Jeremy! That's why she has the weird nickname!" Ron muttered.
Amy turned around and saw Jeremy next to Candace.
"Ooohhh!" she giggled, interested in his physique. "Who's this nice precious blonde here?"
Candace looked at Amy creeping closer and closer to Jeremy with a glare on her face that would frighten a lion.
"You'd better not touch my sidekick boyfriend!" she growled.
"Oh my gosh!" Amy gasped with joy, "You have a boyfriend, Kimmie?!"
"Um...yeah, why?" Candace asked, still sneering at the mad woman.
"That's so sweet! Jeremy and Kimmy sitting in a tree...K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" Amy chante a little before trying to get into their romance.
_ Ron saw that Amy was distracted by Candace and Jeremy.
Even though they make a cute couple, I don't think me and KP would cut it as BF/GF.
He felt a slight tug on his pants and, once again, Rufus popped out of his pocket.
"Rufus!" Ron whispered with a smile, making sure not to attract Amy's attention. He used his finger to point to the blue button that said, "Chain Restraints" on it.
"See that button on the wall?" he asked quietly.
Rufus nodded his head, his beady eyes fixated on the button.
"Press the button over there so that me, Jeremy, and Candace would be free from these chains!"
Rufus received all of these commands from his owner and crawled on over to the control panel.
"Did you share your first kiss?" Amy questioned Candace.
"Yeah, we did! After all that time obsessing over him, and going on many dates with him, he finally became my boyfriend!" Candace replied dreamily. Even though the personality switch had affected her in many ways, it hadn't affected her relationship with Jeremy...for the most part.
"I decided to bring him along for our very first mission after spending so much time with Ron." Candace continued on.
"So adorable...and that's when I assume that you had your hair done for today?" Amy questioned.
"Yeah...you can call it that!" Candace giggled but her mood quickly turned sour, "But you still better not touch my Jeremy!"
"He can be perfect for my CuddleBuddy experiment..." Amy giggled, twitching both her eyes.
"You are not going to use my Jeremy as one of those cute and cuddly freaks of nature!" Candace seethed, her anger rising.
Amy's demenor was frightening Jeremy.
"Uh..Candace, this woman is definitely scaring me!" Jeremy shuddered.
What Jeremy said stopped Amy in her tracks. She came up to the angry Candace."Wait a minute...you're not Kim Possible!"
Candace smirked, admitting the truth "You're right, Dr. Hall! I'm not!"
"Then...who are you?" Amy demanded.
The teens were released from their shackles, including Candace's balled-up fists. Amy stood there, completely frozen and letting her guard down.
"Your worst nightmare!"
Candace then punched Amy right in the stomach. The force of the punch made her fly several feet across the room and landed on her behind.
Amy scowled, "That's it!" She then whistled for her animal-spliced henchmen. "My sweeties! Get the meanie imposter!" Amy also took out a remote control, "It's time for Mayor Sash to get the smell he deserves!"
She pushed the button on it to make the conveyor belt, and the chair that Mayor Sash was still strapped to, into moving slowly to the genetic zipper. It also opened up a part of the roof above her genetic zipper.
The disgraced scientist cackled, "In just a few minutes, meanies, the zipper is not only going to transform Middleton's precious mayor into a Rakunk but also provide fuel for the satellite dish for me to transform every living being on Earth into my wonderful CuddleBuddies!"
Jeremy came up to Candace's side. "Candace...um, I'd hate to say this, but I can't take them on..."
Candace just simply handed her boyfriend the Kimmunicator.
"Jeremy, get Wade online to re-route that satellite!" she instructed him. "I'll take on Amy's henchmen and rescue the Mayor!"
Seeing that he had no choice in the matter, Jeremy ran with the Kimmunicator in the hopes of messing up Amy's plan.
The animal henchmen tried to get Candace but were proven to be no match for Candace's superior moves.
The pig-like henchperson tried to get her but Candace somersaulted into the air and performed a sweeping kick to knock out the pig henchperson from underneath its feet. The rooster-like henchperson was the next person to be knocked out by the sixteen styles of Kung-Fu Candace now possessed in her hands and feet.
A few minutes later, all of Amy's animal-mutated henchmen had been knocked out by Candace. She also dropped cages on all of them from the ceiling above.
"Is that the best you can do, Amy?" Candace taunted her enemy, performing a karate pose in front of her. "Or are your dumb barn animals much too slow for my moves?!"
Amy growled at the failure of her Cuddlebuddy henchmen to capture Candace.
"If my cuties can't capture you, meanie, then I'll have to do it myself!"
The mad geneticist tossed the remote controlling the conveyor belt aside and lunged herself at Candace. The two women tossed each other on the floor.
Jeremy went to the control panel and plugged the Kimmunicator's cable into the port.
Wade came on-screen.
"Hey, Jeremy, what's up with you guys?"
"Um, hey...Wade, is it?" Jeremy asked, speechless that a 11-year old kid was behind all of these computers.
"I guess it's your first time being the sidekick, huh?" Wade replied.
"Let's just say that Candace is all gung-ho for me being the distraction..." Jeremy nervously said.
"That would usually be Ron's job. Anyways, you need me so that I can reroute the giant satellite dish away from the warehouse, thereby foiling DNAmy's plan of turning the entire population of Earth into her own CuddleBuddy farm?" Wade then asked, summarizing the whole fallacy of Amy's plot.
"That's what Candace told me to do." Jeremy said. "But how can you reroute a renegade satellite dish?"
"Jeremy, I have broken through super-villain's security systems before and I graduated from college when i was eight!" Wade replied, revealing his expertise in the craft of hacking. "A satellite dish hacking is not that difficult at all!" He cracked his knuckles and began to type away, hacking into the controls of the satellite dish.
Wade rerouted the controls of the dish away from the TV warehouse.
"See?" the hacking genius grinned, "Not a problem at all! Now...to focus on Amy's zipper!"
Wade also added in a warning, "You might want Candace to move out of the way!" He typed on his keyboard at a rapid pace to hack into Amy's genetic zipper.
While Candace and Amy were still fighting, the mad geneticist looked up at one of the tracking maps and saw, to her dismay, that the satellite dish was moving away from its intended course.
"NOOOOO!" Amy screamed in dismay. "NO! NO! NO!"
Using this opportunity, Candace loosened Amy's protective vest, buckle by buckle and then pushed Amy away from her.
"Candace!" Jeremy yelled, looking at the charged-up zipper that Wade now controlled. "Get out of the way!"
"No problem, Jeremy!" Candace replied, somersaulting out of the way. She grabbed the remote and pressed it, closing the roof.
The genetic zipper fired a burst of electricity at Amy, zapping her.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" she screamed.
Before the teenagers' very eyes, Amy was transformed now into a RaKunk. She now possessed the body of a sewer rat, along with the tail, and awful smell, of a skunk. The only thing that was still...well...human about her was her moptop hair, glasses and facial features.
"Ewww...what's that awful smell?!" Jeremy complained, closing up his nasal passages to try and avoid the repugnant smell.
"That's the Rakunk, dude! KP told me that other Cuddlers didn't want it because they complained of the skunk's fumes!" Ron replied, covering up his nose.
"Wait...Kim collects CuddleBuddies?" Jeremy asked, slightly amused.
"Yeahhhhh...I should've kept that part quiet..." Ron blushed, slightly embarrassed that he gave away Kim's secret of keeping those stuffed animals.
"It's no big deal" Jeremy laughed, "Still, I am pretty proud of my Candace in capturing the bad guy." He then grinned at her. He then leaned his elbow on one of the buttons on the control panel, unaware of what he pressed.
"Oh this is just perfect!" Amy complained, "I told my fellow Cuddlers at last years' Cuddler-Con that I would dress myself up as a Cuddlebuddy, not being transformed into one!"
Candace put on a gas mask hidden in her backpack. She grabbed a nearby cage on the table and put the ugly CuddleBuddy-transformed Amy into it and locked it up.
"Even as a freak of nature, you still look ugly, DNAmy!" Candace snarked.
"No fair!" Amy huffed but then grinned, "However, you're still forgetting about one thing!"
"That would be...?" Candace asked, glaring at her enemy.
"The Mayor!" Amy laughed, pointing with her claw at the struggling Mayor Sash trying to get out of his chair still rolling on the conveyor belt. He was halfway to the genetic zipper.
As if things couldn't get more complicated for Candace, alarms began to blare throughout the warehouse.
"Um...Jeremy, I hate to ask this, but what button did you just press?" Candace asked.
"I don't know, Candace. All I did was to lay my elbow on it, and suddenly alarms are sounding all over the place!" came Jeremy's reply.
"I also need to ask you this..." Ron chimed in. "What color was the button you just pressed.
Jeremy looked behind his body and replied, "Um...red?"
"Yeeeeeaaaahhhhh..." Ron groaned, drawing on the 'Yeah'. "You just pressed the self-destruct button!"
Self-destruct sequence in three minutes.
"Self-destruct button?!" Jeremy exclaimed.
"It's standard on many villain lairs to have one." Ron explained, "And usually...I press them!"
Self destruct sequence in two minutes, forty-five seconds!
"By accident or on purpose?" Jeremy questioned, panicked that he put himself and his girlfriend in danger.
"By accident..." Ron nervously said.
"Great...a self-destructing lair, just so not what I need!" Candace groaned upon hearing the alarms.
"So how are you going to save the mayor, Kim Imposter-ible?" Amy taunted through her cage.
Self-destruct sequence in two minutes, thirty seconds.
"Forgot who I am? I am Candace Possible, the girl who can do anything!" Candace proclaimed proudly.
"Okay..." Amy replied speechlessly, "That doesn't make any sense!"
Candace performed several backflips to where Mayor Sash was. She landed on her feet on the conveyor belt and removed the gag from the mayor's mouth.
"Oh, Kim Possible!" Sash exclaimed with relief, "It's great that you're here! Hurry! Untie me before I get into that...zipper thing!"
"Frankly, Mr. Mayor, I'd be more worried about the fact that the bad guy's lair is about to blow up!"
Self-destruct sequence in exactly two minutes.
"Just get me out of the chair, Miss Possible!" the trapped mayor insisted. "Or I am going to be dead meat in less that two minutes! And that's a nice haircut you got right there!"
"Why thanks!" Candace replied, receiving the compliment, "I'll have you out in a jiffy!"
Candace took out one of Kim's most unique inventions, her laser lipstick. She was slowly and surely becoming more like Kim in almost every way.
"Mayor, move your hand out of the way so that I have enough space to cut these restraints!"
Self-destruct sequence in one minute, thirty seconds.
The mayor nodded and twisted his left wrist out of the way slightly so that the only thing the laser lipstick would cut is the metal restraints. The precise beam of the laser melted through the metal very quickly as it clanged to the floor. Candace repeated this with the other hand.
Sash was now free from his trap. He and Candace jumped off the platform.
"Come on, guys! We have to get out now!" she yelled. "Ron, you got your mole rat?"
Ron grabbed Rufus and put him in his cargo pants pocket.
Self-destruct sequence in 60 seconds.
"One naked mole rat present and accounted for!" Ron replied to Candace "Come on, Jeremy!".
"Gotcha!" Jeremy exclaimed.
The four ran as fast as they could to the front exit of the warehouse. However, the warehouse was beginning to collapse. Fallen debris blocked their way.
Self-destruct sequence in 45 seconds.
"Mayor! Is there another way out of this place?" Candace exclaimed.
"There's a back entrance, where those things of hers took me!" Sash answered, pointing to the very back of the building.
Ron exclaimed, out of breath, "I just wish if the lair wouldn't collapse in on us for once!"
"Oh yeah!" Candace stopped a moment. "I almost forgot..."
She grabbed the small cage containing the Cuddlebuddy-transformed Amy. Luckily for Candace, it was lightweight so it wasn't a burden on her.
Self destruct sequence in 20 seconds...19...18...17
He and Jeremy ran behind Candace and Sash to the back entrance of the warehouse. Candace kicked down the wooden door as the base was collapsing around them. She put the small cage inside her backpack.
She took out the most important piece of the inventory that Kim would normally use, outside of her Kimmunicator: the hairdryer grappling gun.
16...15...14...13
Candace took aim with the grappling gun and fired it upwards. The hook connected to the ledge of a nearby four-story building. She held the mayor with one hand.
"Jeremy! Use your grappling gun and grab the Mayor's hand! My weight alone can't support Sash's body!"
12...11...10...9
Jeremy took out his grappling gun and fired it. Likewise, it too connected with the ledge of the building. He grabbed Mayor Sash's other arm.
Ron, meanwhile, fired his grappling gun as well, connecting him not to the ledge of the adjacent building but it wrapped around a pipe instead.
8...7...6...5...
Together, they pulled on the trigger as the grappling guns lifted them off the air with the Mayor holding on tightly. She felt the wind blowing through her hair as they jumped onto the building, a safe distance away from Amy's self-destructing lair.
4...3...2...1...
The ensuing explosion destroyed the entirety of the abandoned warehouse, including her genetic zipper. The only thing standing, though, were the steel cages containing the Cuddlebuddy-mutated henchmen Amy had.
"Whoooaaaa...!" went Ron as he was screaming at the top of his lungs. He narrowly missed Jeremy and landed on the ground, around twenty feet away from them behind an air conditioning unit.
"Don't worry..." Ron groaned, raising his hand, "I'm okay!"
"This is one day that I would like to nearly forget as Mayor of Middleton..." Sash sighed, patting his forehead "...if it weren't for Kim Possible and...her partners who's names escape me. Now if you don't mind, I'll call up the local news stations downstairs!" He opened a nearby door and went down the stairs.
Ron muttered, once again failing to get recognition, Someday, Ron...someday...
Candace beheld the afternoon sun, looking out in the distance.
"Isn't it wonderful, Jeremy? We stopped Amy's plan from transforming everyone into freaky CuddleBuddies, we saved the Mayor of Middleton..."
"And I didn't lose my pants!" Ron yelled. His clothing was intact for the entirety of the mission.
"Candace?" Jeremy tapped her from behind.
"Not now, Jeremy..." Candace replied, sighed with relief now that the mission of foiling Amy's plans was a complete success.
"I think you might wanna look..."
Candace turned her head around, closing her eyes for a brief moment, and also closing her lips, ready to kiss Jeremy.
"Okay, Jeremy, what is..."
She then opened her eyes...red on her cheeks.
"...it?"
Jeremy was in his printed underwear with the Giant Floating Baby Head on it.
"I have a feeling that something is missing, Candace..."
Candace was stunned "Okay...this may seem awkward, Jeremy, but...um...what happened to your pants?"
"Uh...yeah...about that..." Ron intervened, holding up Jeremy's torn pants.
Jeremy sighed a little, but Candace couldn't help but giggle at his floating babyhead-printed underwear.
"Oh you..." she smiled, and then kissed Jeremy on the lips.
