CHAPTER 51

Thankfully Miranda acted quick and called their doctor, Jake to inform him of what was going on with Reese and he made sure to personally be ready and waiting of Bianca and Reese's arrival to the hospital and quickly admitted them in. After rushing Reese to the emergency room that night, Jake quickly got them into a room and examined Reese then the did an ultrasound and the room filled with a suspenseful silence for over three minutes. Then Jake turned to them both and said: "I'm sorry."

After they had been given the grim news Reese became hysterical; refusing to believe that their baby was gone. Unable to accept the medical explanation of why she had miscarried, she had let out this cry that sounded so outside of her. It was a cry of grief, rage, despair, desperacy and angst. So animalistic and so heartbreaking that it made Bianca breakdown in tears. Jake had to call in a few doctors just to hold Reese down and sedate her.

Bianca clutched onto Reese's hand as she watched her sleep. As strong as she tried to be it was no use. She couldn't help but welcome the fresh tears that flowed down her face every few seconds. How did they get to this place? Wasn't it no more than twenty-four hours ago that they were talking about the future with their child? Now this child was no more.

Bianca kissed Reese's hand and left the room. She began to pace, tugging on the roots of the back of her head. Closing her eyes she prayed that this were all a bad dream. Her first instinct was to punch something - anything so that she could feel anything but the pain that she had felt. She heard her name faintly in the distance and it was Jake.

Abandoning his role of doctor, he collected Bianca in his arms and just let her cry. She could feel him gently smooth her head, "It's okay," she would hear him say every other moment even thought she far from believed it.

"We were four months into our pregnancy. I thought that by three months we were considered safe," her voice was raspy from crying.

"Technically you were supposed to be. But the egg…it didn't attach to the uterus properly."

Bianca shook her head, "So it wasn't because Reese was lifting anything or still working?"

Jake shook his head, "No."

She nodded, "Good. I don't want her to try to blame herself for any reason for this." Bianca knew that she would have to help build Reese back up and knowing how hard Reese could be on herself, she had to make her know for a fact, that this wasn't caused by her at all.

"Reese should be able to wake up in an hour or so. So if you need to call home or take some time for yourself, why don't you do that?"

Bianca quietly nodded, "Ok. Thank you."

"Of course," he nodded. With that, Jake was walking down the halls resuming his rounds.

Bianca didn't know what to do. She had to call somebody and let them know what was going on. Bianca pulled out her phone and made a call out to Kendall, praying that she would answer. When there was no answer from Kendall, next she tried her cousin, Greenlee

"Hello?" The sleepy voice of her cousin answered.

"Greenlee?" Her voice broke in a cry.

Greenlee's voice immediately sounded more alert upon hearing her cousin's cry over the phone, "What's wrong?"

"The baby…"

"Oh God," she didn't have to go any further to explain, "Reese miscarried?"

"Yes," she sniffled.

"Oh, B. Where are you?"

"In the hospital still. They had sedate Reese. She was hysterical after learning the news."

"I'm on my way."

"You don't have to come."

"Bianca, I'm coming." Greenlee hung the phone up and immediately got out of bed.

With the sound of rusting hangers in the closet, Ryan groaned beginning to wake up, "Honey?"

"Sorry, babe." She called over her shoulder, quickly putting some pants on.

"Going somewhere?" He sat up.

"To the hospital. Bianca called. Reese miscarried."

He roughly rubbed his hand on the side of his face, "Aw man. They only just announced their pregnancy."

"I know."

"Did you want me to come with you?"

"No, you stay. I'll keep you updated," they quickly kissed and Greenlee rushed out of the bedroom on a mission to get to the hospital.

oooOOOooo

Reese lay on her hospital bed positioned upright, looking out at the window, cursing the sunny, bright skies from the beginning of morning for looking so happy. As odd as it may have sounded, she felt as though having it storm and shower out would have comforted her best. She found the strength to finally place her hand upon her stomach since given the grim news and grasped to the fabric covering it in angst. Nothing was there. Fresh tears surfaced just as the room door slowly opened and in came Bianca.

"Can I come in?" He took a step into the room.

"Sure, I don't care," she kept her stare to the window.

"Don't shut me out - I can see you doing it already. I love you," she took her hand, "and I am going through this with you."

Reese whipped her head to her, "You weren't the one carrying it!" She snapped. "You aren't the one that feels as though in some way that you failed or that you did something wrong to cause...You just don't get it!"

"I was this baby's mother too," she said calmly, "WE lost a child. Not you."

"But I miscarried it," her stare was back to the window, "Please, leave."

Bianca stood there for a few moments in hopeless sorrow, watching Reese then turn over on her side with her back facing Bianca, facing the window. Once she did that, Bianca exited the room.

Greenlee rushed to her cousin once she exited the room. "Is she okay?"

Bianca shook her head sadly, "She's shutting me out. She wants to be left alone."

"The last thing that she needs now is to be left alone. Let me go inside and talk to her a bit. After I leave the room, I want to you to go in despite her request for you to stay away and make her know that she's not getting rid of you," she smiled encouragingly at Bianca. "Don't worry, I've got your back," she winked before going into Reese's room.

Reese let out a heavy sigh, "Said leave, Bianca."

"I'm not Bianca."

Upon hearing Greenlee's voice, she sat up and turned towards her, "Greenlee?"

Greenlee held her hands up as she walked towards the bed, "I understand that you most likely aren't in the in mood to talk, so I'll do all of the talking while you just listen."

She rested her back against the bed as she stared silently at Greenlee. Greenlee sat on the edge of the bed.

"Did you know that I was pregnant once?" The expression on Reese face read that she did not know.

Greenlee continued, "I'm surprised that Bianca never told you, but then again Bianca never was much of a gossiper. That's part of what makes her a way better person than me," she joked.

Reese slightly smiled at Greenlee's comment. Greenlee continued talking while she still had engaged.

"When I miscarried I was…in a state of disbelief, shock, and devastation. I was so mad most of all. I was convinced that that doctor didn't do everything in his power to save my baby and I couldn't face that reality that I was no longer going to be a mom. Kendall sat on the edge of the bed and told me that the miscarriage couldn't be stopped. It wasn't anything that I did that caused it. My pregnancy wasn't viable…it just happened." She grabbed onto Reese's hand and squeezed it tenderly.

Greenlee wiped a stray tear before continuing, "And I'm saying the same to you. You did nothing wrong, and believe me, sweetie I know that you are mad as hell and deserve to be. But don't shut out the woman that you love because she would walk through fire for you if it meant stopping your pain."

Reese finally spoke, "I failed her," she croaked.

"What?"

The tears began to roll chubby and fluidly, "I was building Gabi's ramp and carrying these planks of wood-"

"Stop it!" Greenlee pointed a stern finger, "Don't you dare start playing the blame game with yourself. Carrying a five-pound piece of wood wouldn't do that to you. You build things for a living and are very hands on despite your title as Director of a firm. Your actions did not cause this."

Wiping a tear, she nodded halfway believing Greenlee's words; "I was planning on setting up the nursery next weekend. I was going to…" she trailed off.

"It's okay to be hurt and feeling everything that you are feeling right now. Don't live in though. Don't let it be all that you feel. This is a tragedy, but it's a tragedy that you will overcome," Greenlee gently gave Reese's hand one last squeeze before exiting the room.

Once Greenlee exited the room, Bianca sprung up towards her cousin, "How was it?"

"She'll be okay, but she blames herself and fears that you will too. I told you that you of course don't and that she shouldn't blame herself either. You both just really need each other right now."

Bianca nodded, "Thank you, Greenlee," they embraced in a deep hug.

"Of course. Call me if you need me. Go in after her," she encouraged.

Bianca watched Greenlee take off and then looked at the door to Reese's hospital room. With a deep breath, Bianca entered the room. Reese made eye contact with her immediately and the tears welled up in both of their eyes.

"I love you," Reese voice cracked.

"I love you," Bianca rushed to Reese side and hugged her lovingly, "I love you so much," she kissed Reese's lips and then forehead.

"I'm sorry for how I was to you earlier. I was so terrible to you."

"You were in shock. It's okay."

"Bianca…we lost our baby," she cried.

"I know, but we will be okay. We still have each other and the girls, and if we end up having another child or don't, I will not love you any less."

Reese pulled Bianca into another hug, crying silently in her arms. "Take me home."

"Jake still has to do a few more test to make sure that you're okay and then I'll take you home. Okay?" Reese simply nodded. "He should here at any minute. In the meantime why don't I get you something?"

"Orange…actually I guess I could take a coffee."

Bianca slightly froze at the request remembering that Reese was so adamant about not drinking coffee the moment that she found out that she was pregnant. Now that she no longer was, her request was her coming to grips that she wasn't carrying their child anymore.

"Sure," she kissed her hand, "I'll be right back."

The moment that Bianca closed the door behind her, fresh tears rolled down her face. To see Reese's face puffy and pink from crying broke her heart and all she wanted to do was make it better for them both. Quickly she wiped her tears and headed to the coffee machine. It had to get better from here. Please God make it get better.


AUTHOR'S NOTE: Thanks for reading! Leave feedback/reviews and next chapter will be up as soon as I am done writing and editing. Thanks again!