AN: Blame this update on my playlist :) Right now it consists of a lot of Kate Havnevik mixed with a little Blue October (Balance Beam – 'she's a magnetic girl that I hardly even know…so this is not another love song' - and Into the Ocean), Ivy (Edge of the Ocean), and David Usher's The Music (get this song cause its beautiful. The whole thing is just like one great poem from start to finish). I have a forum, and really, I suppose I could be using it for this stuff. And I do have a music thread. So if anyone wants to share what they play or lyrics or whatever, please do. I have a huge mp3 library but it will never be big enough.

That and an email today made me aware that I've left everyone hanging on Catalyst for pretty much a year with no updates and I figured I could use this as a way to give a brief explanation to everyone else who might be wondering what's up with that what is up with that. I am eternally sorry. I really am. I have no excuses for it. I know how the story ends, what happens. I just don't quite know how I'm going to get there yet. Other things got priority and I got lazy. I stopped sitting down and making time. But I am working on it. Picking it out as it comes to me. As for all the others, I just don't know. I know how Adrenaline ends. But I don't know if I'll ever be able to finish it. I'll try. And Chrome, I really don't know if I ever knew exactly where that was going. Velocity Shift will be finished someday just because I love Storm too much not to finish. As for the story I had planned for after her role in Puzzling Pieces, I don't know.

Add to that the fact I've been downsized out of my job and still don't know where my next paycheck's gonna come from and I've got a lot more on my mind than my writing lately. A lot more. But I've been working a bit harder at it. Trying to remember why it was important to me in the first place, and I'll keep working at it, because it still is a very large part of who I am. I only have two more days to write for poor Temp and then this book, book one, is done anyway. So I hope since I have it all mapped out it goes well. Then I'll have to see how part two goes. But I'm not going to work at it too much more than I have already until after I finish Catalyst. Not a total asshole Vince has been hard for me to channel lately. I think because I actually really like how this story is turning out and this Vince feels very real to me. At least, real to me for how he would have been at 22 :)

Ciao, T

Oh yeah, the character of 'hot cop' still isn't mine, and while I have taken liberties with his character, that is still all I am free to take liberties with :D We all know that were he actually mine, I'd be pimping him out and making lots of money, no job needed :D He does have a bit more of a role in a later chapter or two, but I still wouldn't get attached to him were I you…

The Funeral of a Good Girl

By – TempestRaces

Chapter Fifty Four – Of Sweet Obliviousness and Game Points

"Where are Mia and Tempest?" Dom asked Letty as he cornered her in the kitchen, far enough away from the living room stereo that he could hear her answer.

"I dunno. Should we go looking for them?"

"I don't know. What do you think? Was she pissed enough to leave Mia behind?"

"I don't think she's mean spirited enough to leave Mia behind. No matter how mad she's been with her lately."

Before Dom could answer, he heard a cheer go up in the living room. He walked down the hall just in time to find a crowd of admirers offering Tempest more congratulations on beating him. Some of the anger reared back up. She shouldn't have been in the race in the first place. She really shouldn't have been able to beat him. But she had, and there wasn't a lot he could do about it now. He already hated her. What else was there? He had to be slightly grateful she'd brought his sister home safe. Someone killed the stereo. Leon rushed up to the girls.

"Where the fuck were you two?"

"We hit some heavy, heavy heat and traffic leaving and I had a hard time shaking them. By the time we were clear we were way off course. And then in the process of getting back on the path home, we got pulled over."

Leon wondered about the grin on her face. "And you're happy about that?" He watched Vince stalk closer out of the corner of his eye. Clearly, neither he nor Vince had missed her change in attire.

Before Tempest could answer, Mia chimed in. "She's sitting there in what is likely an illegal car, with tons of definitely illegal accessories, cool as can be, playing stupid with the totally hot cop. He gets her out of the car to make her show him if she has NOS or not and instead of getting taken in, or getting a fine, or losing her car, she gets a date with the hot cop for tomorrow night."

Tempest made what she hoped was a modest face and shrugged. "What can I say? Guess Hot Cop has a thing for stupid girls who can't pump their own gas, but who have grease caked under their nails. And who hide their nitrous injectors under the manifold." She smirked.

"You're going to date the cop?" Leon asked incredulously.

"Maybe," Tempest answered and shrugged. "He never asked who Mia was, so he has no idea where I stay down here. He just has my home address. I don't think it's going to help him much. I might just lay off driving the car as much as possible for the rest of the time I'm here and not call him. And then again, I might date Hot Cop."

"Were you dressed like that when the hot cop asked you to date him?" Leon growled, finally pointing out the obvious changes in her clothing. "Is a simple date all this cop thinks he's getting?"

"The cop saw right through my act. For some reason he didn't care to call me out on it. So yeah, I think he knows that the outfit just went with the dumb act I was putting on. I didn't say I was going to do it Leo," her voice softened. She knew Leon was just worried for her. But going out with a supposed hot traffic cop was the best way to piss Vince off she currently had in her arsenal and god damn it she waned to piss Vince off more than she wanted almost anything else. "I just said he offered me that option. He let me go no strings attached. Well, he promised that if I date him tomorrow night, I won't get hassled for the rest of my stay. He said if I don't, he can't make any promises. But he was grinning when he said it. He offered to take me to dinner."

"But he gave you his personal phone number," Mia chimed in, a hint of envy in her voice.

"Maybe I'll give it to you and let you call him."

"He wants the smug Miss James. Not me. I might as well not even have been there."

"Now Mia, don't pout. It wasn't you who practically had to fall out of your pants to keep your car out of impound."

"Thank god. If you think I ever would have had the audacity to unbutton my pants with a cop on his way to the window, think again."

"Coulda backfired," Vince finally broke in. "He coulda been a hard ass that woulda taken you down harder for soliciting a police officer."

"Well, you know us worthless sluts. Soliciting is about all we're good for." Tempest looked Vince over. He was drunk. Figures!

The crowd oohed and Dominic winced on Vince's behalf. Vince had really fucked himself over this time. He watched Vince try to think of something to say. Of course, Vince had been pulling down Corona like water since he'd arrived home. So he wasn't exactly playing with a full deck.

"So, are we done here?" Tempest asked, one corner of her mouth lifted in a sneer. She had two options. Walk away or really let him have it. She wasn't sure which one would make her feel better because all in all the whole situation had just left her feeling strange and unsettled.

Mia grabbed Tempest by the wrist. "Let's go get you a drink." She dragged Tempest out of the room and back to the kitchen, taking the decision out of her hands. "You don't need to fight with him while he's loaded. Not worth the headache."

"He's just plain not worth it."

Mia made a noncommittal noise. "What do you want?"

"Something with lots and lots of gin in it."

"You better make it. I have no idea what lots and lots is."

Tempest took the bottle of liquor from Mia and scorned the glass she had been provided. She put the mouth of the bottle to her lips and pulled hard, taking three or four gulps of the liquid straight before coming up for air with a choking cough. "Forgot how potent this shit is straight up."

"You're going to make yourself sick again."

"Maybe." Tempest finally used the glass, adding ice, juice and gin before stirring the mixture and taking a tentative sip. She sighed and allowed her eyes to drift closed. Much better.

"So," Mia started. "You really gonna go out with that cop?"

"I think I will. Why not, really?"

"Because he's a cop and you're a street racer. You are diametrically opposed to cops. It's in your nature." Mia smiled.

"I have so many cop friends at home it's not even funny. I have nothing against cops. I have lots against being caught." Tempest grinned. "But nothing fundamentally against cops. Cops are great friends. Especially ever so slightly dirty ones. The ones that catch you doing twice the speed limit and just flash their headlights at you. And tease you about it when they find you in the bar next."

"For real?"

"Yeah. It's a small place, where I'm from. Fall in with one and then you get to know them all."

"Lucky. We pretty much try to out run them all the time. You never know down here when you'll get some gung ho ass that'll take your car just for fun."

"Thanks for telling me that now, not before I stopped for Officer Hard Body."

"Well, there was really no where to run to, and your car doesn't blend into the crowd in any way."

"I guess not. Once he saw my car the first time, he could pretty much make me anywhere." Tempest looked around the kitchen. No one was paying them any attention, no one was eavesdropping. "He was as hot as I think he was, right?"

"Oh yeah," Mia grinned.

"Ok, then answer me this?"

"What?"

"If he was hot, and has a good job, and seemed really nice, nice enough to let me leave with my totally illegal car after I went totally illegal street racing with my totally illegal nitrous system and he totally knew about it all, why aren't I more excited about letting him take me out to dinner tomorrow? Why would I gladly give you his number and beg him to take you instead if someone or something could just show me how I can possibly forgive Vince for what he did?" She didn't give Mia an opportunity to answer. "But it's not like I can ever forgive him for what he did! I said this was the last straw and if I go back on it I'm just some weak bitch. Some weak bitch who likes getting treated like shit!"

"No, you're not. You're a woman in love. And love is messy and irrational and stupid and consuming and it hurts. But we do it anyway. It doesn't have to make sense, and you don't get a choice who you love or how or when, or even if you should. Sometimes you just fall in love and get taken along for the ride. Don't you think you keep letting him back in because you actually can't help it? Not because you're weak but because you just can't say no?"

"I couldn't. But now? I think I can now." Tempest looked over at Mia. "I have to. There is no future for me with him. Love is everything you said it is, and then some. But sometimes, no matter how hard you wish differently and no matter how hard you fall, sometimes love just isn't enough. And you can't make it enough no matter how hard you try."

"So you're going to date a hot cop then." A small, lopsided smile lifted one corner of Mia's mouth. The emotional trauma both Tempest and Vince were willing to go through in the name of not admitting they'd fallen for each other saddened her greatly. Tempest was correct in a lot of ways. If she wasn't willing to move, and Vince wasn't willing to admit how he felt, there was very little future for them as a couple. No matter how they felt about each other. No matter how hard they fell for each other, with the stubbornness neither was willing to put aside standing between them, they were destined to only shatter when they fell. Never to catch each other. They didn't really know each other at all and it was never going to change. Not if they weren't willing to actually share how they really felt with each other. And it seemed they weren't.

"So I'm gonna date a hot cop. A hot traffic cop," Tempest agreed with small grimace. "And hope that someday after I'm home and this is all a distant memory that it stops hurting. But in the mean time I have this desire I can't say no to that's telling me I have to hurt him back somehow. And some instinct is telling me that dating the cop is the only thing I have left to do that might possibly make him feel some small measure of what he dealt to me tonight."

"What if hurting him isn't the right thing? What if that just makes it worse? What if letting it go and putting it behind you would be better?"

"That's too easy. After what he did, me just walking away is far too easy. I don't think I know how to let it go that neatly, this time."

"I sure hope you know what you're doing."

"Well, that certainly makes two of us," Tempest answered. "But frankly, I don't think I know sweet fuck all about what I'm doing. But more importantly right now, I need to decide if I'm getting drunk, or just slightly happy."

"Bad things often happen when the two of you get drunk together."

"Bad things often happen when the two of us get around each other period. I don't think we need to be drunk or not drunk. Just alive and breathing is enough."

"He wouldn't react so strongly if he didn't really care, if he wasn't really effected by everything you do."

Tempest gestured toward Mia with her half empty glass. "So says Leon. Too bad I just don't see jealousy as the same as caring." Tempest shrugged as she finished draining the beverage from her glass. She made herself a fresh drink, and with a tired smile for Mia, headed toward the living room.

That was where Vince found her some time later, after he finally got his nerve up to try and talk to her again. He started her way, walking along the wall and hoping she wouldn't see him right away. She was in the centre of a group of people. Mostly male people. He stopped within hearing distance and just listened to what they were talking about for a minute.

"How the fuck did you catch him from trailing the whole field?"

He watched as Tempest smirked. "I am the mack daddy of street racing?"

Everyone chuckled. "But yo, I mean for real. Your car just that damn fast or what?"

"Well, yeah," she sighed. As if sensing that glib quips weren't going to satisfy the curiosity of a room full of guys who had often dreamed of doing what she had done, and never got up the courage or were never given the chance, she put a hand on her hip. "Ok, so it's like this. It's a Nissan Skyline. GT-R. Got the RB26DETT. And now it's got everything to go with it. Cams, intake, exhaust, forged pistons, upgraded rings, reinforced block, heads, headers, big huge turbos, nitrous direct port kit, brakes, suspension, tires. Next to no turbo lag. You name it, this car has it." She looked around the group with a grin. "For all your racing needs, drop by The Racer's Edge and see Harry, by the way."

He grinned in his dark corner, unable to help himself. Of course she was pimping Harry. He'd put her into a dangerous situation that she'd had no business being in. But she'd enjoyed herself. So that didn't matter. Not to mention men of all ages, shapes and sizes seemed to end up her best buddies somehow. He didn't know how she did it. With the exception of the odd few they all ended up seeing her as just one of the guys instead of a girl they might like to try and get with. She blended into the male crowd that well, ninety nine times out of a hundred. She continued telling her story.

"Anyway, the reasons why I did it aren't something I wanna go into. But I just decided to press the car and my luck in a split second and once I was going it was hard to second guess myself. At the end I realized I wasn't gonna be able to take him from where I started just on the car's own merits, so I started dumping my second bottle in with what was left of the first. It was like oh, I dunno, a six hundred shot, but Jess says that it likely only upped me about five hundred. It was enough to kick it over the line first."

She jumped up on her toes a few times and put her hands in the air over her head, she made like she was shooting a basket ball from the three point line. He wondered where her actions were going.

"Three point shot, swoosh, nothin' but net." Everyone cracked up laughing.

So cocky. He walked up into the centre of the people gathered around her and looked around. Whatever the others saw on his face was enough to convince them to move along. He never said a word, but the crowd broke up and moved on, leaving the two of them basically alone. "Swoosh?"

"Did I do something to give you the impression I was again talking to you? Sorry if I did. It must be how huge a stupid bitch I am."

She was quite drunk, he noted. And regretted the fact he'd allowed himself to sober up in preparation for this chat. He ran a hand through his hair. "I didn't mean to say any of that. I just didn't want you to get in a fight with Dominic."

"Really?" she asked with a sneer.

"Yeah, really. Remember what happened the last time you got in a fight with Dominic? You took off out of the house and ended up buying a trailer load of shit for Harry and you had no idea who you were getting it from."

"One, for the record, Harry asked me to do that and I agreed long before the fight with Dom. And two, how on earth could you think it would be better to hear that shit from you than from Dom, who I already couldn't stand anyways?"

Ignoring the fact her point was very valid; he pushed on as if he hadn't heard it. "I didn't want you to get hurt fighting him. It's pretty obvious that you think you can take him, and not just with that razorblade tongue."

"In a crowd of people which included Leon? You thought it was gonna get that out of hand right there? That Leon and Jesse were going to let a fight between me'n Dom get physical? I don't buy that for a second. You get off on saying shit like that to me because it puts me back in my distant place!"

He hated the way she could read him so much better than he could read her. How had she figured that out? He was like a man in a cave whose flashlight had just gone out trying to figure what she was thinking, feeling, and she just knew what was in his head without an effort made at all. She put on an act like everything was fine and he never saw it was an act. She ripped his face off in a heartbeat and he didn't know for what. But he couldn't get an answer out before she pressed on.

"Well, congratulations! I'm so distantly in my place now that I don't even want to talk to you, let alone expect anything else out of you. If I'm ever dying of thirst in the desert, I don't even want you to get a fuckin' drink for me, ok? So just leave me the fuck alone!"

She pushed past him and headed down the hall into the kitchen. He sighed before pushing through the crush of bodies and finding his way to his chair in the corner. Why am I such a stupid prick?

A short time later, he decided that for once he shouldn't take the easy way out. He made himself get up out of his chair and go looking for her. He'd try to explain himself again and see if he could make her understand. She was loaded, which wasn't a point in his favour, but he was almost sober, so that was. It wasn't good when he tried to reason with her while he was intoxicated. A fact which had been proven time and time again.

He couldn't find her anywhere in the house. He checked everywhere. He even checked in Leon's room and Jesse's. Since both of them were still upstairs, he figured he was safe enough, but she wasn't in either room. She wasn't in his either, not that he was surprised about that. But she wasn't in either bathroom, or Letty's room, or Mia's. She wasn't in the kitchen and she wasn't in the living room. Her car was still in the driveway, so she hadn't been stupid enough to drive anywhere.

He finally gave up on his search. But he gave up on his ability to be around the party still raging in his house at the same time. He knew he wouldn't be able to go to bed while the music was still blaring and while he was still in the dark about where Tempest had gone. He decided to go and sit on the picnic table for awhile and nurse a Corona while he kicked his own ass.