October 14 and 20 (story)

I don't not own the characters of Twilight.

We arrived at the water. As Alice put me on the ground, I looked up and down the shore line. It was completely void of life. The only evidence of anything living or otherwise was the ocean crashing against the sand, pushing and pulling in interdict patterns.

I climbed over the driftwood that littered the edge of the sand. I looked out to the ocean and watched as the clouds parted never the horizon allowing the sun to show itself for one last time before the world hid it away for another night.

I turned and found the three women were standing within the shadows of the trees. I wasn't sure if it was a natural defense or if they were giving me the space I was requesting silently. I bid them forward with a wave of my hand.

I watched as they looked at each other and then directed attention to Alice. Her eyes glazed over momentarily. As they cleared, she nodded at Esme and Rosalie. They took a few steps forward into the fading light of the day.

I continued to watch as the sun fell on their skin. They sparkled like Edward but there were differences between them all. Alice's sparkle was light and had a baby blue hue. Esme's was soft and a light lilac purple. It was Rosalie's that was the most impressive.

Rosalie stepped forward. I could see her enjoying warmth the sun gave to her. Her sparkle was more of a glow. The bright translucent red that flowed from her body was full of love and hatred at the same time. I never thought it was possible for her to be more beautiful than she already was but the light from the sun was proving that wrong.

As they continued to advance, I turned and faced the ocean again. I imagined each of the crashing waves as an obstacle that had crept into my life in the last month and knew what I wanted and, strangely, needed to do.

I didn't care about my casts. Carlisle would fix them. I started forward over the dirty white sand. I felt the grains push their way into my cast feeling like sandpaper under my feet. I dipped my good foot first into the water as it pushed its way up the shore.

"Bella?" Esme's voice asked from behind me. I knew she would be worried. If this was to go wrong, Alice would have stopped it by now.

I continued my slow stroll towards the waves, feeling them lap against my legs. I pushed myself further into the cold water. I could feel the goosebumps creeping up my legs and across my body. As the water continued its assault on my body, I feel its power start to push me back.

I surged forward, fighting the waves, imagining each one being another person in my life trying to control what I did or what I wanted. I was nearly waist deep when I started swing my fists at each wave as it washed over me. First was my mother, next, Phil, then my father. I wanted my family to be the first I would fight. I had the most anger towards them. The savageness of the waves was like sick reminders of my past.

Once I was up to my chest I was being thrown around. I went for Victoria, James and their clan of newborns and vampire-animals next. I fought forward and overcame those waves also.

I was swimming, watching the waves as they towered over me. As they crashed down on top of me, I imagined Jacob pulling me towards him. He wanted me, he claimed that I was his. I wasn't allowed to have the choice. I fought against the Cullen's. They hadn't really done anything wrong except come into my life and complicate it but I fought them also.

I came back to reality as I swallowed some of the seawater. I turned myself around and looked back as the sun finally descending into nothingness. I waited for the next wave to come towards me and instead of fighting it, I allowed it to take me. I rose to the top of it and allowed it to carry me into shore. I imagined this being Edward.

I didn't see it has him carrying me, protecting me. I saw this wave as him traveling with me to an unknown end of a journey. He wasn't fighting me. He was working with me, enjoying the ride with me. I washed gently to shore and just laid there. I allowed my emotions to overwhelm me. I wasn't fighting them now I was flowing with them. I cried, laughed and screamed until I was too exhausted to do it anymore.

I felt detached from my body as I was lifted out of the water. I was cold, numb both mentally and physically. I felt so dead and alive at the same time. I turned my head as I felt a radiating heat start to penetrate my body. A campfire had been build on the soft sand. I looked up into Esme's eyes as she carried me to the warm shelter they had constructed.

Her eyes in the fire's light shone with a bright golden yellow. There was love in her eyes and hope. I wrapped my arms around her neck and hugged her tightly. For all intensive purposes, she was now my mother. She would be the grandmother to the beautiful little girl I had seen in my vision.

After what seemed like hours, I finally spoke for the first time. I had dried off some time earlier and Esme had done what she could with my casts to help keep the bones immobilized. "What am I going to do?"

"About what, Bella?"

"About everything. Every little piece of this intersections with another piece and causes more and more bullshit. I can't seem to get a break. Then through it all there seems to be a light, a beacon, for me to push towards and, again, someone blocks my way."

"Bella, what's going on?" Rosalie asked in her musical voice.

I thought about everything for a moment as I watched the flames of the fire crackled and burn through the wood. It was then I realized, the women were sitting back from the fire. I looked around at each of them. They were patient and loving, waiting for me to let everything out. Lay it on the table for examination.

"Let's start with the easy stuff. My mother. She tried to kill me. Why? Why would she hate me so much? I tried to be a good child. I wasn't responsible for the decisions that she and my father made. How could I be blamed for her failures? I am not to blame.

Then, we have Phil. I didn't ask for any of his beatings. I didn't ask for his sick way of showing love. It wasn't love. It was a hatred for himself, for me, for my mother. They came together out of need. They needed each other to fill in a gap in their lives. They used each other and, in turn, used me. I'm not to blame for that. I didn't encourage it. Now, where is he? Will I one day have him appear out of nowhere and have to fight that battle again?

Victoria and James. What is it about them that made them these evil and vindictive monsters? Why couldn't it have happened to someone else? I'm not strong enough to fight against them and their nature. Why do I have to be the object of their obsession?

Next is Jacob. He decided that he wants me. Supposedly, he has imprinted on me or at least he thinks so. He tricked the elders and Carlisle to stop my future. He won't stop till he has what he wants. Me

The Volturi. I know about you. There is only one of two ways that can end. Either I get turned or I die. Because of Jacob's trick, I can't be turned by the one person I would have change me. It would break the treaty. And if I am turned or I die, my vision will never come true. I will never be able to have my future with Edward.

Edward. That's the hardest thing for me to deal with. I'm not suppose to find a man. Have a man who claims he loves me. A man who would do anything he needs to do to protect me. Would do anything I ask of him. I'm suppose to hate men. I don't trust them. They have never done anything for me to give them trust. But Edward continues to fight for me. To show me he isn't like all men."

I fell silent. It was so much. Too much. I looked into Rosalie's face as she sat next to me.

"Bella, we will handle the Volturi and the treaty. Let Edward take care of Jacob. But what vision of the future are you talking about?"

I looked at Alice and she looked down at the ground. She hadn't told them either. She hadn't spoken a word of the vision to anyone. I appreciated her secretive nature.

I retold my vision and what my shield had told me. As I told my story, I felt Rosalie's arm drop off my shoulder. As I finished, I looked and saw an anger in her face. Her eyes were full of hate.

"Never, it can never happen. It's not fair. I can't so why should he?" She stormed off into the woods.

"What? I don't understand. Why?"

"The only thing besides a man to love her that Rosalie ever wanted in her human life was a child. After Carlisle turned her, that was no longer an option for her."

"But, Esme. I can't be a mother to a new generation. I don't have the strength. I need her and the rest of you. She would be the perfect mother. You all would. My child will require love and support. She will need training and someone who understands what it is like to be vampire. I don't have that knowledge.

I'm beginning to believe everyone has a destiny. Rosalie's destiny was to find Emmett. He is the yin to her yang. She was suppose to become a vampire to help raise my child, show her the ways. Can't Rose see that?"

Esme wrapped her arms around me. "She will in time. You need to give her time."

"I can't handle another person against me. I don't have it in me to fight someone else. Especially someone I consider family. I just can't do it."

"Somehow, some way, Bella, this will all work out."

"How do you know, Alice? Have you seen the future? Have you seen a vision where everyone is happy and has what they want? Do you see me smiling and full of peace and joy?"

"Yes."

"What?"

"In your vision. You were happy. You were full of love. You were surrounded by it. If it is your destiny that you saw that day, then it will happen for you. It will be that way."

"There's just one problem. I'm dying. Not this moment but I will die one day. Edward and our child will be left alone. They were mourn and grief over my loss. I can't be responsible for another thing I can't control. And that is what it is. I can't be changed because of the treaty and the Volturi will demand it or death. One way or the other, I lose."

"I promise you it will not happen."

"Please don't, Esme."

"No, Bella, as your mother, I promise you it will not happen that way. Your future will be the way you envisioned it. I am making that promise to you."

I throw myself into her body and sobbed. I release the final insecurities. I let my past be that, my past. I decided it was time to move forward. Be strong when I had to be and allow others to be strong for me when I couldn't. Somehow, my life would be the perfect vision I had seen.

We sat for a while longer, watching the waves coming in and enjoyed each other's company. I felt the soft breeze swirl through my hair. The contrast between the heat of the fire and the coolness of the night air felt good against my body.

Alice suddenly stiffened and turned her head towards the forest. I felt my body go ridged as Rosalie came racing out of the tree line. As quickly as she appeared, she had me thrown onto her back.

I, once again, found my head being tucked in so the branches wouldn't cause damage to me. I tried to listen to the quickness of the words being exchanged amongst the women. Their conversation was so quick that I couldn't catch any of it.

I was scared. I didn't know what was happening or who was coming but knew from past history that being thrown around like a rag doll wasn't a good sign. We continued through the woods, dodging trees, branches and bushes along the way. I peaked my head up every now and then and found the trees were thinning out.

We came to the main highway and stayed just inside the trees. Alice and Esme broke away from Rosalie and I. Esme ran straight down the highway, avoiding the odd car that found itself confronted with the vampire. Alice was nowhere to be found but I knew she wouldn't be too far away.

Rosalie turned slightly and made her way up the embankment and onto the road. She ran beside Esme as a car came screaming down the road. I watched in horror and relief as the car's tire screeched to a stop, leaving its marks on the road.

One of the doors in the backseat opened and as we approached I saw Edward in the backseat. Emmett was driving. I felt my body being thrown carefully into the backseat and into Edward's waiting arms. The car accelerated and raced into the pitch blackness of the night.

I felt complete and suddenly safe within Edward's arms. I found my body relax and I fell into a deep and sheltered sleep.

"This is fucking ridiculous. I can't fucking do this anymore. I have to fight. I can't continue to hid like a bitch."

"Bella, love....."

"Stop, Edward. I don't need you to be Mr. Perfect right now. I need you to understand. I know I'm weak compared to the rest of you but there must be something strong within me that as brought this bullshit on my doorstep."

"I'm not Mr. Perfect." He almost sounded insulted.

"So stop acting like it. God, it gets irritating." I was going stir-crazy.

I had been locked up in my four-star prison for almost a week and Edward's gentleman ways were starting to drive me nuts. I hadn't realized how quickly that "act" got tiring. I couldn't handle it anymore. I wasn't sure if it was the vampire in him that made him annoying perfect or if it was just him. I just had had enough.

Something snapped. I found myself leaning against the back of the couch I had been sitting on. His change had taken a full second. It was like a split-personality had taken over.

"I am not perfect. I never claimed to be. I'm who I am. I have my faults. I fell in love with you. Do you want to start there?"

"What? So I'm a fault of yours. Sorry to ruin your perfection."

"Fuck off, Bella. I'm so tired of your self-delusional pity. Sorry for this, sorry for that. Stop being sorry for shit you have no control over."

"Well, what then? Walk away if you don't want to love me. Fuck you. I was doing fine on my own before you came into my life and ruined it. I enjoyed hating men and you had to fucking stick that cocky smile of yours in my face and ruin it."

"I didn't say I didn't want to love you, you stupid child."

"Stupid child. You want stupid. You want child. I'll give you stupid and childish." I walked into the kitchen.

I could hear Edward enter the kitchen behind me. I walked over to the fridge and opened it. I pulled out the item of my search and turned towards him. "Here is stupid and childish."

I squirted mustard around the room and then across his shirt. I throw the near empty bottle at him and then turned back to the fridge. I grabbed another item closest to my hand and pulled the ketchup out.

As I turned, I found myself shrouded in a cloud of dust. I quickly realized that I was covered in flour. I coughed and looked through the white powder. I eyed my prey and squeezed the bottle directly at him. His face was the first to be covered in the red sauce.

I dropped the now empty bottle and lunged at him. He didn't try to stop me. I jumped on him and he took a few steps backwards out of the kitchen and back into the living room. I finally looked for the first time into his face.

"Not so perfect now, are you?" I hissed.

"Not at all."

"Edward, stop being a perfect person around me. Stop being a gentleman. Be my man, my boyfriend. Don't treat me like I'm an innocent little girl who doesn't have any feelings. Love me, Edward. Don't be afraid of showing me you love me. Don't just tell me. Show me."

I had finally accepted that I loved him. I needed to show him. The frustration through the week had continued to build higher and higher. No one had even told me why I was being hidden away. Edward and I being sheltered away by ourselves had boiled to a point that I was out of patience with myself, Edward and the situation.

"Bella........"

"Don't Bella me, Edward. I love you and you love me. Be a man, not a gentleman, but a man. If you love me you'll show me you love me."

I could feel my breath being pulled from my lungs as his lips crashed against mine.

I know......about time she took control of her life, right?