I don't know if this is the right place to say this, but it'd feel wrong if I didn't say anything. I know I have quite a few readers and regular PM's from people who live over in the United Kingdom, and, after everything that's been on the news this week, let me just offer you all my sincerest condolences for what has happened in your country. But, let me also just say how your community and country have come together in the aftermath, and the love and support and selflessness that I have seen between you all is nothing short of inspiring.

It's a horrible, cruel, and terrifying world that we live in, and, I think, now more than ever, it's so important for us all to stand together, no matter who we are or where we're from. We're all the same when it comes down to it, we're all equal, we're all flesh and blood. We're all human.

These deplorable acts are being carried out all over the world, and there is no excuse for it. There is no humanity in these acts of hatred. So, wherever you are from, we all stand with you. Love always has to be louder.

If anyone ever wants to talk, about anything, or just simply wants to chat, please don't hesitate to send me a PM.

But, moving on from the serious stuff, thank you for reading and reviewing the last chapter, your support means the world.

Hope you enjoy this chapter!


Saving Grace

Chapter Fifty-Two: The Beginning Of The End

Sioux Falls, South Dakota Motel Room 11:12 PM.

To say that Haley Winchester was terrified would have been an understatement. A massive understatement.

Twenty-eight years of her life and she had never experienced a fear like the one that consumed her in that moment.

In no more than a few brief seconds, accompanied by a blinding white light and a deafening high-pitching ringing, it had all been over. And now, there she was, locked away in the smallest corner of her own mind like a prisoner, unable to move, unable to speak, unable to take control of her own actions. Is this what possession truly felt like? Was this the extent of the horror that was felt by those whose bodies were taken over by an evil force much stronger than themselves? Is this what Sam had experienced when he had been taken over by a demon? Had he felt as locked away and alone as she did there? She couldn't bring herself to think about it.

There was a pounding against her skull, and she knew that he felt it, too. Her skin burned, and she could have laughed at the thought she had winched away in pain at the simple touch of an iron to her side; because that was nothing compared to the agonizing burn she felt now. It was beyond comprehension. Was this what Castiel had warned Sam about? Was this her body, his vessel, crying out for demon blood? She felt a sick at the thought.

Lucifer took a few steps forwards, and she felt her legs move slowly across the room. It hurt, almost similar to the sensation she felt the day after a long run. Her legs seemed stiff, and it ached when they moved. But she no longer controlled that. It wasn't her body anymore. It was his. He stepped over the body of Nick at his feet, his forgotten vessel, and paused ahead of the large mirror on the wall. A soft smile crossed her features for the briefest moment, satisfied. But she didn't match his feeling of accomplishment.

Haley looked ahead at the mirror, through the eyes that now belonged to the archangel, and, in that moment, she truly didn't recognize the girl who stared back at her. The cold green eyes that returned her gaze were ones that she hadn't seen before. They were void of life, empty, and they promised nothing but evil. Her entire life, her entire existence, it was all trapped with her behind that stony face, and there was no way of getting it out again. She tried to blink, tried to look away from the image before her that proved what she had become, but she couldn't. No matter how hard she tried to force her body to co-operate, no matter how much she willed her eyelids to close for a moment, it just wouldn't happen. She wasn't in control anymore.

The face she saw wasn't her own, and it filled her with a terror like nothing else she had ever known.

It was real, it was happening, and she couldn't quite get a grasp of the situation she was standing in. It felt surreal. A year ago she had been concerned with nothing more than paying her rent, or making it to work on time, and now? She was the vessel of Lucifer. The devil himself was the reflection staring back at her.

She tried to think, tried to move, tried to take back some of the control, but it was no use. There was no fighting it. Not yet.

But, maybe that was the point. Haley knew, somewhere in the back of her own thoughts, she knew, she had to save her strength, until the time was right.

And then, something about the situation changed. For a short moment, she felt like herself. She was on the other side of it, as if she was standing inside the mirror, and she looked ahead at the version of herself that she just couldn't bring herself to recognize.

The face before her contorted to a smile. "Thank you, Haley." Lucifer stated, sincere. "Maybe this was the way it was always supposed to be, what do you think? You and me, a team, the two of us against the world."

"You ain't gonna win this, Lucifer." she told him, and she wasn't sure where the confidence behind her words came from, because it was something she sure as hell wasn't feeling. "I promise you that."

But the smile never faded from his face, or, rather, her face. "Such anger in you, who knew." he mused. "You've got me all wrong here. I'm not the bad guy."

Haley shook her head at him, and she fought back the urge to cry. Everything about the situation scared her, and the pain she felt was overwhelming. The terror and fear was like nothing she had felt before, yet she forced herself to stare right back into the dark green eyes ahead, identical to her own yet nothing similar.

"Who are you really angry with, Haley?" he continued, curious. "Me? Yourself? Or, them?"

"I'm not gonna play your mind games, Lucifer." she spat, yet there was no denying how her voice wavered the slightest bit at her words. "You leave my brothers out of this."

"You know, Haley, I waited for your brother for a long, long time. He refused me, again and again. Truth be told, I wasn't sure I was ever going to get him to say yes." He sighed, and he shrugged. "And then there was you. You allowed me in, you gave me a vessel. It's not perfect, and it isn't the way that it was supposed to be, but here we are. Perhaps you really were the one who was made for this."

"You're wrong." she rebuked.

"I am?" He shook his head. "Sam and Dean, they always had each other. But who was there for you, Haley? You were always alone. In those twelve years, it was only you and that dark place inside your head. I know how that feels. I was cast out of my family, I was alone in that cage, none of my brothers came to find me. You've been alone for a long time, but not anymore."

Haley shook her head at him. "You're so wrong." she said, but her voice was little more than a whisper. "We are nothing alike."

"I'm not wrong, and you know that." he countered, calm. "This doesn't have to be a bad thing, Haley. This doesn't have to be a fight. I'll allow your brothers to live, your friends, I want them to live. I'll bring your folks back, too. I want you to be happy, Haley. Because, I am grateful."

Haley said nothing, because, at that point, she couldn't. The chilling voice that came from her mouth was something she could no longer bare to listen to. It wasn't her voice anymore.

"But, until then, we have things to take care of." he went on, and he offered a smile. "We have to defeat Michael first. We have to prepare."

And, as quickly as it had changed, it changed back. Haley once again only saw Lucifer in the mirror ahead, she only felt his presence, and, like before, she was once again locked away inside of her own head, trapped.

In that moment, Haley knew, this was how she was going to die.


Sioux Falls, South Dakota — Bobby's House — 12:01 PM.

Dean slammed the front door closed behind himself in frustration, and he pulled a hand down his face. Truthfully, the panic was beginning to sink in his chest, and every moment that they didn't find Haley was another moment spent thinking about every dark and horrible scenario possible. There were only so many places that they could search for her, and, honestly, they were all at a complete loss. They had spent the entire morning wandering around in circles with no real direction, and it had come to the point that they'd had no choice but to stop. They needed to come up with a real plan, and they couldn't do that driving the streets in the hope of simply stumbling upon her. Maybe they had been naive in thinking that it would be so easy.

Sam and Bobby were already back at the house, and they stood in the living room, expectant, waiting for him. They looked on at him as he entered, and he didn't miss the glimmer of hope that flashed through their features. But all he could do was give a slow shake of his head. The looks on their faces proved that she wasn't there. They looked concerned, worried. It was evident that the same dark thoughts which had been spiraling his mind were now creeping into their heads, too.

But, he noticed, there was someone else missing, too.

"Where's Cas?" he asked, apprehensive. The last thing they needed was another person going rogue. "Did he find her?"

Sam shook his head. "I don't know." he muttered, despondent. "He hasn't come back. He's not answering his phone. Where did he go?"

"Uh, he said he was gonna check out that motel on the edge of town, said he'd call if she was there. Didn't hear back." He shrugged, honestly, he hadn't given it much thought at the time. "Cas isn't the problem right now, we need to find Haley."

"How?" Sam pressed, impatient. "Anything we could have used to track her with is here. Her phone, credit cards, hell, she didn't even take a car. This isn't her taking a break, Dean, she knows exactly what she's doing. She doesn't wanna be found."

Dean frowned. That much was true, and it was those thoughts that proved to him something was wrong. The fact that she seemed to have just disappeared meant that either she had been taken by something, or that she had gone off somewhere with the intention of staying hidden from them. He wasn't sure which idea concerned him more. If Haley didn't want them to find her, he knew that it would be damn near impossible for them to get a lead on her. He had to wonder what had been going on in her head the previous night, because he knew that it had to have been more than what she had let on. Then again, it always was with her.

"You know something, Sam, I don't really care what she wants right now." he rebuked. "I care about where she is. So, we need a plan, how the hell do we find her?"

Sam heaved a sigh, because he sure as hell didn't know. "We need to find out what happened to Cas." he stated. "If he found something in that motel—"

"Why are you so concerned about Cas right now?" he snapped. "Haley is the one that's missing."

"Yeah, and all I'm saying is that there must be a reason he didn't come back from that motel. Why did he even go there? How did Cas know that there was a motel on the edge of town? Doesn't that seem a little odd to you?" He shot him a pointed look, as if to ask how he couldn't have worked it out earlier. "Maybe she was there. Maybe something else was there. If Cas knows something about what happened to her—"

"Nothing has happened to her." he pushed, but even he didn't sound sure of his own words. "We just... we need to find her."

"What about Crowley?" he suggested. "I mean, for all his faults, he could track her. Hell, he keeps finding us without a problem."

"Crowley?" Dean exclaimed, incredulous. "Are you kidding me? You wanna get Crowley involved? Of all people?"

Sam threw up his hands in defeat. "Well, if you have a better idea, I'm all ears." he rebuked. "Dean, we got nothing. And you know it."

Dean shook his head at him, and he stormed past him to the kitchen. Without a word to either men behind him, he took a bottle of whiskey from the counter, and he took a long drink. He couldn't think. He couldn't get a straight thought together in his head long enough to concentrate on it. Dean knew his little sister, better than anyone else in that world knew her, so why couldn't he find her? What could be so bad that she didn't want him to find her? Why was she running? Or, where was she running to? What was she planning? If anything? Had something taken her? Had something happened? Maybe it was the angels again, maybe they were finally giving up on Sam and making a move for her. He wouldn't dwell on those thoughts, because he couldn't handle them.

Footsteps approached from behind, but Dean didn't turn from where he leaned forwards against the counter, and he bowed his head.

He heard Sam sigh. "Dean, man—"

"No, Sam." He stopped him, abrupt, because he couldn't listen to a speech filled with optimism at that point. "You don't... you don't get it." Slowly, he turned, and his eyes proved his fear, they showed the concern, there was no hiding it. "I can't lose her again. I won't."

"Dean, we will find her." he assured. "There has to be a way. There's always a way."

"Yeah?" Dean raised his eyebrows, skeptical. "How, Sam? Tell me. What if she was planning something? How the hell are we supposed to stop her when we can't even catch a lead on her? You know as well as I do, if she wants to stay hidden, she can."

But, he noticed, Sam didn't appear to be listening to him. His attention was elsewhere.

"Dean." His voice was calm, quiet, and his gaze was focused solely to the kitchen table before him. "What's that?"

Dean followed his gaze, but he didn't understand. He opened his mouth to ask him what he was getting at, to question why he suddenly looked so afraid, but he saw it. And he stopped. His mouth opened and closed, as though he was struggling to form an answer. His eyes narrowed to the envelope that lay untouched on the table, and he could see the single sentence written on the front; I love you, and I'm sorry. There was no mistaking it, the writing belonged to their sister, and, without opening it, he knew deep down what was inside.

"She's done something stupid, Dean." Sam stated, but he seemed wary to move. He didn't blink. "Like, Lucifer stupid."

Dean took a short breath, and he struggled with the urge to agree. But he wouldn't. Not until he knew. "It's an envelope, Sam." he told him, blunt, and he snatched it up from the table. "It doesn't mean anything. You need to calm down, alright? She wouldn't."

Sam opened his mouth to argue, but he didn't have the chance. A bang came from behind them, and both brother's turned.

Blue eyes looked between them slowly, sorrowful. "She would."

Castiel stood before them, and he stumbled slightly as he made an attempt to take a step forwards. Sam and Dean instinctively grabbed a firm hold of him before he could collapse to the ground, eyes wide. He was a mess. Blood stained his coat, and he looked ready to drop where he stood. He looked terrible, as though he had been in a fight for his life and he had only just won it.

"What the hell happened to you?" Dean pressed, alarmed.

Castiel grumbled, and he dropped down into one of the chairs at the table. "Your sister."

Sam frowned, and he looked between the angel and his brother, confused. "Wait, Haley did this to you? Why? How?" That didn't make any sense, he didn't understand. "What's going on, Cas? Where have you been?"

"Heaven." He straightened himself up a little, and his gaze rose to Dean. "Would you not make the same sacrifice to save your brother, Dean? I'm sorry, I am, but your sister has said yes to Lucifer."

Dean's eyes were wide, and for a moment he couldn't even react. A part of him wanted to ask if he had heard him wrong, but he couldn't seem to find the ability to form words. He slumped back against the wall behind him, and all he could do was stand there. He didn't move, didn't blink, didn't breathe. His sister had said yes to the devil, she was gone, this was it. How could that be real? How could it be true? How could she have done such a thing?

Immediately, Dean was sure that he had lost her all over again. He convinced himself that he was never going to see his little sister again, and he was going to return to that same dark place that he had lived in those twelve years without her. He wasn't sure he could face it. The world was a darker place without his sister, and he had learned that the hard way. He wasn't sure he could watch her take on Satan. He wanted to know where she was, if she was okay, if she was even alive inside her own head. Was she scared? Was she even conscious, did she know what was happening around her? Had it been her choice, or had they forced her into it?

Slowly, hesitant, and not noticing how his hands were shaking, he turned his attention to the envelope still clutched in his grasp, and he ripped it open, desperate for some kind of clarity. He prayed that, whatever was written inside, it said something different. He hoped to anyone who would listen that she was about to tell him otherwise, or that she had a plan. He needed answers, he needed to know what was going on with her. He unfolded the piece of paper inside, and her neat handwriting filled the page in black ink.

Sam and Dean

Given what I'm about to do, I'll be surprised if either of you even bother to read this, but it would feel wrong if I left again without at least trying to say goodbye. I don't really know what I'm supposed to say here, so I'll keep it short.

First off, let me just say that I'm sorry, for everything. I know about the angels, and I know that I'm their backup plan for the vessel. Truth is, I've known for a while now, longer than either of you have. I know that I should have said something, but maybe I knew all along that we'd end up here. Honestly, this isn't something I've decided over night, I've thought this through, and I know it's the right thing.

I want you to know something, this isn't about giving up. This isn't about me backing out of the fight. This is about us running out of options. We all made the choice, one of us had to do this, one of us had to take on Lucifer, so why couldn't it be me? It was always going to be one of us, and I think deep down you both know that's true. We've run out of time and we don't have a plan. I couldn't sit back and watch Sam take on Satan.

I can never thank you both enough for everything you've done for me, and I don't just mean since I came back. Despite everything, I'm glad that you found me again. Even through everything that happened, through everything we've been through, I wouldn't take back that day for anything. And maybe this is how I can repay you, both of you.

I know that you're going to be pissed at me, and I don't blame you for that. The only thing I'm going to ask of you now is please don't hate me for this. Be angry, that's fine, but don't hate me. I know that you're probably going to come and find me, but you'll be too late to stop this, so, please, for me, just stay away. Don't try and stop it. It's not something that I want either of you to see.

Dean, I don't think that any girl could ask for a better big brother than what I had with you. You were always there for me, no matter what, and I don't think that I ever really thanked you for that. You made everything seem better when it got bad, and I know that you can do the same thing for Sam now. You always did.

Sammy, I want you to know something. This isn't on you, and I need you to remember that. Please, don't blame yourself for what I'm doing. I never doubted that you were strong enough to take on the devil, because I know that you would have been, and I know that you could have beaten him. But I couldn't let you take that chance. You're my kid brother, and there is nothing in this world that could make me okay with letting to risk it all like that.

The two of you can make it without me, you've proved that once before. I'm not so sure that I could do it the other way around. You made it twelve years without me there, all you really need is each other. Stick together, the way that you always have done, because I'm gonna be watching. That's a promise.

Tell Bobby thank you, for everything. And tell Cas that I'm sorry for what I did to him, but this was the only way.

Just remember one thing, I love you both, and I could never have asked for a better family than what we had together. I'm proud of us.

Haley.

Dean dropped the letter down to the table, and he turned away from the three men looking on at him, expectant. He felt sick. His sister was gone, she was as good as dead. She had made the ultimate sacrifice and there was no taking it back. The realization ran through his mind, over and over, Haley was gone. Again. He couldn't even form a straight thought in his head. Everything around him just seemed to come crashing down, and he couldn't breathe.

Sam frowned, because he didn't like the look on his brother's face one bit. He picked up the letter, and he read through it carefully.

"She's gone." Dean stated, and his voice cracked the slightest bit over his words. "Haley's gone." Not sure what else he could do, he dropped down into one of the seats at the table, and he rested his head in his hands. "What the hell was she thinking?"

Sam shook his head, because he couldn't say anything. He placed the letter down to the table, and he stared at it. He couldn't speak.

"We should have stopped this." he resolved, and his voice was soft, barely audible. "We should have realized this the day she found that essay. She was planning this even back then. That's why she was so angry."

But Dean frowned at him, because he wasn't following. Was his brother in shock? He wasn't making sense, at least, not to him.

"What are you talking about?" he pressed, cautious.

"Dean, Haley wasn't just upset when she read it, she was mad. Really mad. She was already planning on saying yes to Lucifer, even back then. That's why it bothered her so much. Everything that was written on that paper, she knew she was about to do it all again." But he didn't understand it. "If she was planning it back then, why didn't she say something? Why didn't she tell us?"

"Because she knew that we'd stop her." Dean muttered. "I would have stopped her. If I'd have known, she knows I would. I'd have locked her in that panic room and I would have left her there. She knows that."

Sam pulled a hand down his face, and the fear showed clearly in his eyes. "What the hell do we do?"

"Boys." Bobby's voice broke through to them, and they both turned as he turned up the volume on the television.

"Reports are flooding in, a seven-point-six earthquake in Portland, an eight-point-one in Boston, more in Honk Kong, Berlin, and Tehran." The news reporter was saying, and each brother felt the dread twist in the pit of their stomach. "The U.S.G.S. has no explanation but says to expect a six-figure death toll."

Castiel sighed, defeated. "It's starting."

"Yeah, you think, genius?" Dean rebuked. He rose from his seat, and he shook his head, he had heard enough. He turned off the television pointedly. It wasn't over yet. Dean refused to sit there and mourn the loss of his sister, not if there was a chance that she could still be saved.

But Castiel didn't appear to share his attitude. He threw him a look, somewhat offended. "You don't have to be mean."

Dean threw up his hands. "So, what do we do now?" he asked, looking between the three men before him, desperate.

Castiel gave a half-hearted shrug. "I suggest we imbibe copious quantities of alcohol." he deadpanned. "Just, wait for the inevitable blast wave."

"Yeah, swell. Thank you, Bukowski." he muttered. "I mean, how do we stop it? How do we help her?"

"We don't." he countered. "Lucifer will meet Michael on the chosen field, and the battle of Armageddon begins."

There was something. "So, where is this chosen filed?" he pressed.

Castiel shook his head. "I don't know."

"Look, there has to be something we can do." he pushed, impatient.

"I'm sorry, Dean." he offered, remorseful. "This is over."

"No." Dean snapped, because he wasn't going to accept that, not where his sister was concerned. "It's not over."

Sam gave a slow shake of his head, he couldn't think. "What are we supposed to do?" he asked, almost hesitant. "Really, Dean, what can we do here?"

In these moment, Sam turned to his brother for strength, for hope, but the look on his face proved that he had neither.

"I don't know, Sam." he admitted, honest. "I don't know. There has to be something."

"There is nothing we can do." Castiel stated, blunt. "It's too late."

Dean rounded on him, and the anger flared in his eyes. "I'm warning you," he seethed. "Stop it."

"Dean, what is it that you think you can do? You can't save your sister, Lucifer isn't going to give her up, not now." His voice was calm, steady, but forceful. "You can't stop this fight from happening, and you can't stop Michael from destroying Lucifer. This is over."

"I'm gonna go talk to her." he concluded, and a little more confidence showed in his words. "I need to talk to her."

But the comment seemed to confuse Sam. "You're gonna go talk to her?" he pressed, skeptical.

"You read that letter the same as I did, Sam." he pushed. "I'm not going to have her die thinking that I hate her, or that I'm angry at her. Hell, I am angry at her. But that doesn't change anything. She's still our sister, and she has never once turned her back on us. After everything, don't you think we owe her that much?"

Castiel shot him a look, somewhat apologetic, and he shook his head. "You won't be able to talk to her, Dean." he said simply. "I'm sorry, but the only person that you'll be talking to is Lucifer."

"You back the hell off, Cas." he snapped, impatient, frustrated. "I ain't talking to you here. She's our sister. And I am not about to leave her out there possessed by Satan, alone. I won't let her die alone."

Bobby frowned at him. "So, that's your plan?" he pressed, dubious. "Go talk to her?"

Dean nodded, because, at that point, he wasn't sure what else he could do. "Yeah, I am." he told him, determined.

"She's our sister, Bobby." Sam stated. "We can't bail on her now. Hell, it's my fault she is where she is in the first place. We have to do something. We have to try."

Bobby sighed, and, although he knew it was a plan more than likely destined to bring them all to their deaths, he nodded. "Alright, fine. Let's find this field."


SWAN SONGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG! Question is; who's going to die a horrible death next chapter?! Sam, Haley, Dean, Bobby, Cas? OR ALL OF THEM.

Thank you again for reading, your support keeps me writing! Next chapter should be up as soon as I've stopped crying about it, so, you know, no promises;-))) but, for arguments sake, it'll be up in a few days.