How in the world did this get so long?! I can't believe y'all are hanging on to my little fantasy world with me! Thank you :) We're almost done though. Just a few more chapters.

Chapter 50

Elly led Carolyn down to his car and tried to suppress the nervous energy running through him. It wasn't working. He was jiggling his keys in his pocket and Carolyn reached down to lay a hand on his arm, the signal to still it. He had to smile up at her. He'd always been a fidgety child, and it drove her up the wall. He was tapping on something at all times, and she used to tell him he was going to vibrate out of his chair. He always seemed to be tapping his foot and pencil at the same time while doing his homework. She learned by fifth grade that if he wasn't tapping, he wasn't working. She'd also learned that if he was nervous he picked up the habit uncontrollably, usually without realizing it.

"So are you going to tell me about what you've been doing that's unsafe?" she asked as they got into the car.

Elly took a deep breath and released it in the form of the truth. "I have been drugged twice in the past month, and Ned had to kill a man who took me hostage."

"Whoa! What?!" she exclaimed.

"The first time I was drugged I'd been working at this club, you know, doing my DJ thing to help out a friend of a friend who owns the place. I was having a blast! Ned and I were there together, it was great to be behind the tables again, and then things started changing around closing time. Ned was acting strange, and then I felt weird, and then there was no denying we'd been slipped something."

"Ned was drugged, too?!" she practically shouted.

"Yup."

"Oh, my god, Eli!"

"Then we went back to the club a week later to hang out with the other DJ there, a friend of mine named Michael, goes by DJ Rise, and when he stepped away for a minute, I took over doing the DJ thing, and these two girls slipped the drug in my drink again."

"Was Ned with you?" she asked.

"He was in the bathroom. But he'd just injured his neck on the job, so he couldn't drink since he was taking pain meds, so they didn't get him." Elly looked at Carolyn as they waited at a red light. She looked pale and shocked. He tried to reassure her. "It's okay. The drugs don't have any long term affects. They're usually used as date rape drugs actually."

"Someone slipped you roofies?! This just keeps getting worse and worse! What were they planning on doing to you? You're a federal agent for god's sake!"

"Well, that was the problem. See, someone was using this stuff to drug people at the club and then kidnap them for human traffickers. They didn't like that a fed was hanging around."

"I think I should be more worried about you than Eric, and he's the one on a stupid boat going off to war torn areas and-and-and stuff!"

"Yeah. The guy at the club that was overseeing all of the bad stuff worked there, and as we went to leave, he pulled me away from everyone and did the whole holding a gun to my head thing, and Ned just shot him. Didn't hesitate. Guy was a goner. Ned's a little protective of me." He turned to Carolyn and winked.

"I think I might love that boy," she said, holding a hand over her chest.

"I really hope you learn to. He isn't going anywhere."

Elly pulled up in front of the coffee shop and they got out. Once they had their coffee and some food they took a seat, and Elly braced himself for the questions he could see welling up on Carolyn's face.

"So…" she began, looking unsure of herself as she took a bite of her bagel sandwich.

"You can ask me anything you want to," Elly said, making it easier on her.

"Have you always liked guys?" she asked.

"Yeah. Women, too."

She nodded. "How did I miss that?"

Elly laughed. "Could've been the time you caught me making out with Lisa Chang when I was fourteen. Or the time you found me and Kelly Michaels in my bedroom together getting way too close for a couple of fifteen year olds. Or the time-"

"Okay!" Carolyn yelped, holding up a hand to stop him. Elly smiled and chuckled. "I get it."

"I didn't have much experience with guys until college to be honest."

"Well, let's be thankful whatever experiences you did have your father wasn't witness to. I can't believe that prick."

Elly sighed. "Have you talked to him since you talked to Eric?"

"I left him one hell of a pissed off voicemail, because of course he didn't answer, and I had my lawyer call him."

"You're seriously going to leave him?" Elly asked, tapping his foot wildly under the table.

"This is just the last straw, Eli. He's been a complete stranger since you moved out here. It was getting bad before, but you knew that. You saw it. When he was home, he wanted to be somewhere else. Anywhere else. It was painful. When I married him, he was noble. He gave a damn. He wanted something better for everybody- you and Eric, me, the country… Now… now he's a surly old sailor who has spent so much time at the top that he doesn't remember what it's like to be down below in the ranks. He doesn't remember what it's like to be a civilian. He doesn't know any other life than controlling every move people make on a ship. That's who he is now. There's no one else in there.

"When we met… geez. I loved his dedication. I loved his spirit. He was determined, and brilliant, and ambitious. But he also loved me. Even after losing your mother, he was able to find something special in me, and that made me feel loved. I had to defend him to my father because Dad thought he was just after my money, but I did because I loved him. Over the years that all faded. The time came that I started to believe that he just married me to raise the two of you. I love you though, and a part of me decided that I was okay with that. If I was blessed enough to have the chance to raise two beautiful, intelligent, compassionate, courageous boys into the amazing men that you are today, it was worth it. There's no real reason to hang on to him if he's not hanging on to me though, and so I'm going to keep the best part of this marriage." She reached over and took Elly's hand in hers. "You and Eric."

"I-" Elly swallowed, took a drink, and then swallowed again. His heart was racing, his palms were sweating, and both feet suddenly stopped tapping as if the whole world was stopping on a dime as the words tried to leave his mouth. "I love you, Mom."

Carolyn froze, barely able to breathe. The words hit her in the chest and exploded, knocking the wind out of her.

"You deserve a lot better than him," Elly said, continuing, knowing he was throwing his own father under the bus, but what did he care? His father had banished him from his life. There was a deeper reality to deal with than his father though. "You deserve someone much better than me."

"No!" she said, reaching up to cup his face and turn his red eyes up to hers. "There is no one better than you my love! I know the monsters that haunted you. I always understood. I knew that you tried hard to open yourself up and just couldn't. I watched. I saw. I saw how much it hurt you. I wanted so much to reach in and pull those memories out, but then I'd think how cruel that would be to pull even a second's memory of your mother from you. I would've been in agony if someone tried to take our precious memories from me. I would've been devastated. That's why I never tried to wish her away. I never tried to make you forget. She was your mother, and she always will be. I know she loved you very much. The one thing I have wanted more than anything in my entire life is for you to know that I love you just as much. Not to replace her love, but to walk side by side with it. Because you, my child, are worthy of so much love. So much. It's all I've ever wanted."

The tears fell down Elly's face and then down Carolyn's hands as she wiped them away. He tried to pull it together, but he wasn't having much luck.

"Can we go?" he asked, trying to let her know with his eyes that he wasn't uncomfortable with her, but with their surroundings.

"Sure honey."

Once they were in the car, Elly sighed and relaxed a little. He didn't turn over the key, instead turning to talk to Carolyn.

"I think Ned has taught me something very important that I didn't realize. I think he opened my eyes to what it's like to really love somebody. He makes it effortless. I don't have to try with him. There's no second guessing it. It happens naturally. That's never happened to me before. I've never been able to love easily, but he… he's so easy to love. He's… my whole world has turned upside down since I met him. I have such an appreciation for life now. My life, the lives of others, life in general. I found the truest friend I've ever had in him.

"When he asked me to marry him, I was a little surprised. We haven't been dating very long. But there was a very big piece of me that settled inside that has always been bouncing around like crazy, and I know that he's the one I want to spend every day of the rest of my life with. I have absolutely no doubts, and every time I think of him that bouncing thing inside of me settles and I know everything is going to be okay in the end because we're going to handle it together."

"That sounds beautiful, honey. I can't honestly say I've ever had that. I guess I'm just of the belief that only the lucky few get to find a love like that. Hold on it so damn tight that you never even think about letting it go, because you're one of the few. What you have is a priceless possession, a dream come true, and the answer to the wish every person on this planet made upon a star as a child."

Elly shook his head. "I don't believe that. I don't believe that only the lucky few are going to find this. I think it's going to take a lot of work to keep and maintain this. It's been freely given, but it won't be free to keep. I think that's true of every relationship. We just have to work hard to keep falling in love with each other over and over again." Elly suddenly had a flash of a memory from a few weeks earlier when he and Ned were talking about Mr. Right versus Mr. Right Now in his kitchen, and how Ned had said he believed people fall out of love with each other all the time. He chuckled. "Ned once told me that he wants someone to fall in love with over and over again. I'm going to do everything in my power to be that person."

"Maybe, just maybe, I'll find someone worth falling in love with over and over again too," Carolyn said.

"I really hope so, because I gotta tell ya, this pretty much rocks."

Carolyn laughed.

"And you deserve an incredible love, Mom. You deserve someone who is going to make you smile, and love you, and let you know that they're thinking about you. You deserve someone who is going to answer the phone when you call, and someone who is going to take you out on all of the dates Dad should've taken you on over the years. Someone to whisk you away to Paris, or take you up to a cabin for a romantic weekend away out of nowhere. You deserve someone who appreciates you."

"I think it's time I gave it a try. My lawyer says that the divorce should be easy to take care of because of the prenup, so I'll be on my own soon. You and Ned should come home and spend some time! It would be good for you to get away. I promise that no one will drug you at home!"

Elly burst out laughing. "My boss just said the same thing to me this morning when I promised to DJ at his wedding in a few weeks. He's actually marrying a guy, too. He and Gibbs are great, Mom. You'd love them. They're like surrogate parents to Ned and I down here. They've been there for us through so much it's ridiculous."

"Careful, you're going to make me jealous!" Carolyn said, giving him a look of stern disbelief.

"They've just wormed their way in. Having Tony take over the team was amazing. When he got rid of Simmons, Greg and I celebrated! She was horrible. Talking about going to get us killed? Uh, yeah. She was trying for it. Then Tony came in, and now I'm the Senior Field Agent, which I don't think I've told you yet, and then Ned joined the team, and he's become a tactical operations god. He's like crazy brilliant! You should see him! I was just in MTAC for a few minutes with him, that's the big room where we do camera talk with people in the military and stuff like that, and he was all crazy confident and not to mention hot! But that's another story.

"Tony and Gibbs have treated Ned and I like family. Ned's family is all like Dad. They actually stopped acknowledging that he was in the same room. Can you believe that? That happened when he was in college, and he still isn't quite over it. But Tony and Gibbs make him feel like he belongs. I have to tell you, Ned's a little weird when you first get to know him. It doesn't take long to see that he's just a little awkward, but that he has a really big heart. And he's crazy smart. He has his airheaded moments, and he's a bonafide germaphobe, but he's amazing and I can't tell you… "

Elly took a big breath, realizing that he was rambling like he used to when he was a kid and he'd get home from an exciting day at school. He exhaled and chewed on his lip for a moment and looked Carolyn in the eyes. "I can't tell you how much it means to me that you're willing to have him in your life." Elly's eyes started burning again, and when he realized that Carolyn was about to start crying too, his tears spilled over. "Because he means so damned much to me, and I don't know, but it's like it has somehow proven something to my stubborn heart, and I just feel so much love from you right now that I've never let myself feel before. I don't know if I'm ever going to stop crying." He chuckled and wiped at his eyes, holding the palms against them to try to make them stop burning.

Carolyn wiped at her own eyes. "I can't believe you're calling me "mom". I know it's stupid, but it just feels like a fairy tale. Like I'm going to wake up any minute now and this is going to be a dream. I mean, I understood, don't get me wrong, but that little thing means so much to me…" Her voice cracked and then she started crying in earnest. Elly pulled her in for a hug, and they held each other in the car while they cried for all the time they had lost.

NCIS*AIS*NCIS*AIS*NCIS

Tony sighed and turned to look up at Ned. "He's fine. He'll be back soon."

The elevator had dinged again, and Ned had looked up hopefully just to be let down when Elly didn't come off of it. He continued pounding at his keyboard like it was a piece of meat and he was tenderizing it.

"We don't know that! He could be having a nervous breakdown or something! First his dad tells him he's not welcome in his life anymore, and then his stepmom shows up out of nowhere and tells Elly that he's the reason she's going to leave his dad. That's a lot to take in!"

"Dorney," Parke said, causing Ned to turn and look at him. "Take a deep breath man. He's a strong guy. He may need a little TLC later, but he's going to be fine."

The door next to the elevator opened up, and Ned's attention was suddenly focused on it like a dog hearing its owner come home. "Elly!" she practically shouted. He got up and went to meet him in the middle of the bullpen. "Are you okay?" He looked over his fiancé with a critical eye, making sure nothing was out of place. He noted the bloodshot eyes and the obvious signs he'd been crying, but he was smiling and it threw off the assessment.

"I'm okay, baby," he said softly so that only them and their friends could hear. "This is turning into a bizarre day."

"I'd say so. So that's your stepmom?" Elly asked, already knowing the answer.

"Yeah. I… I don't want to talk about it or I'll start to cry again."

"No! Don't cry!" Ned whispered, desperately trying not to kiss him right in front of everyone.

"I'm good. Let's just work, and I'll give you the run down when we leave."

Ned nodded, chewing on his lip. "Okay," he said, trying to do what he knew he needed to, but not liking it.

They both went back to their desks, and Elly's messenger popped up.

NDorneget01: I love you.

Elly smiled and looked up at Ned, who was pretending to shuffle some papers while he discreetly watched him. He mouthed "I love you, too" to him silently, and they both smiled. Parke and Tony had both watched it happen, and Parke rolled his eyes at Tony who tried not to laugh. Parke then turned back to his computer and messaged Ned.

GParke01: See? I told you he was okay! Though by the way his eyes are shining I expect he's going to need that TLC I was talking about earlier.

NDornget01: That won't be a problem. I think I can make that sacrifice.

GParke01: Yeah, I figured that would be the case ;)

Ned smirked and messaged Elly.

NDorneget01: Parke says I should give you some tender loving care tonight. What do you think?

ECritten01: *nods* I full heartedly agree. I think I need a lot of it. You think you can handle that?

NDorneget01: I'd get started now if it wouldn't get us fired.

ECritten01: Ha! Yeah. Don't wanna do that. We should probably work, but I can't concentrate.

NDorneget01: I really got to finish this report or I'll be here late, so I need to at least try.

ECritten01: Are we still going ring shopping tonight?

NDorneget01: If you want to!

ECritten01: Yeah! Definitely :) I'll do a little online sleuthing to see where we should go and get ideas.

NDorneget01: Awesome! You do that while I sit over here being jealous and writing about terrorists and how we killed them.

ECritten01: You didn't kill them, honey. You saved a lot of people.

NDorneget01: I did both. I'm trying to focus on the good though. Remind me to tell you what Colonel Russel told me.

ECritten01: Will do. GO! Work! Get the report done so we can get out of here on time!

NDorneget01: Okay, okay! I'm going. And pouting. But going.

NCIS*AIS*NCIS*AIS*NCIS

At 1630, a man in a pair of khakis and a button down shirt came over and put a file box on Tony's desk.

"What are these?" Tony asked in confusion, looking up from his report on the op.

"The files from HR for Agent Gibbs," the man said.

"Oh! Yeah. I forgot about them. Thanks!" he said. As soon as the man walked away, Tony took the lid off the box. The rest of his team's eyes were glued to him excitedly. "McGee! Ziva! Come here!' he shouted over his shoulder.

"What's up?" Tim asked as Tony flipped through a stack of folders.

"Start looking through these. Pull out anyone you'd kill yourself not to work with."

"You mean…? Tim asked, looking excitedly at Ziva.

"I mean that these files are going home to Jethro tonight to look through and narrow down for a replacement for me. Your fourth person. If you take out anyone you'd hate to work with before I give the files to Jethro, it's less for him to go through."

Ziva picked up a stack and started rifling through them. "I do not know some of these people."

"Oh! No. No way," Tim said, holding up a file folder so Ziva could see it.

"Absolutely not!" she said in agreement.

"Just remember one thing," Ned said, causing everyone to turn and look at him. "Six months ago you would've said the same thing about me."

Tony looked up at Tim and Ziva who looked at the folders in their hands and tried not to grimace. "But, Dorney. It's Baines."

"Oh! In that case, I'm with you!" Ned said, his eyes wide. Trevor Baines had one of the cockiest attitudes in the bureau and was lucky to be alive. He'd harassed Abby, and he was known to the other agents as a bigoted asshole. The problem was he was one of those agents that looked excellent on paper. Fitness test scores, gun range scores, FLETC scores were all through the roof. However, he had the kind of personality that was going to get him killed- and not by a suspect.

Tim and Ziva nodded and left the file on Tony's desk. The three senior agents consulted about various possible replacements while Elly and Greg went back to analyzing the database, and Ned went back to his report on the op. After a few minutes, the voices stopped, and Ned glanced up to find all three agents were staring at him.

"What?" he asked.

"Your file is in here," Tony said.

"I didn't ask for it to be," Ned said, going pale. It had become pretty obvious that he wasn't going to go through with leaving the team after all. He hadn't made any indications to Vance or HR that he wanted to move. He knew this was the moment of truth. There was no denying it. He didn't want to be anywhere else but with his team, and he decided right then and there that he wasn't going anywhere. "Take it out. It doesn't belong in there."

Tony smiled as he snatched the folder from Tim's hands. "I'll take that! Thank you!" He opened his desk drawer and dropped it in, then slammed it shut. "Next?"

Ned looked at Elly who smiled brightly at him. Their conversation the other day after they'd talked to Tony came back to him, and he sighed. He was surrounded by incredible people that supported him. He turned back to the report in front of him and realized that he was doing exactly what he'd told Tony he wanted to do. He was making more of himself, stepping up to the challenge, and he was really shining.

NCIS*AIS*NCIS*AIS*NCIS

Jethro looked out the kitchen window at the rain. He had a mug of coffee in his right hand, and the left one was resting on the ledge of the kitchen sink as it held him up. He'd just put a chicken noodle casserole in the oven. He'd found it on the back of a can of soup once and he made it sometimes. It was simple, and he found he could add variations when he wanted to try something new without messing it up too badly. He'd added carrots to this one, knowing that Amira was willing to eat them. He was running out of things he thought Amira would like to eat. He was going to need to learn some new tricks soon in the kitchen or his family would starve.

He wasn't sure what they were going to do about someone to take care of Amira after they took their leave. The clock was ticking and they hadn't even begun looking. He wondered if they should put an ad out, or if they should start their search through an agency of sorts. He knew Leon had gone through an agency, and it worked well for him. He made a mental note to call him and ask for their number. As he thought about it, his phone startled him from his pocket. Amira had passed out on the couch so he reached for it as quickly as he could to keep it from disturbing her. He stepped into the basement and down the stairs to keep the conversation from waking the little girl.

"Gibbs," he answered.

"Hi Gibbs," came Abby's cheerful voice. "I called the park and it looks like they don't have any openings until July 21st in the area you wanted, which I totally agree is the best area for the two of you. That's a Saturday, and they also have the 29th open, the following Sunday. That's about three and a half weeks out. That's like, really soon, Gibbs."

"We want soon, Abby. We really want soon. We just have to get our license, find someone to do the ceremony, and find a photographer. Everything else just needs rescheduled. I'll let Tony know about the dates and he can try to see if Marcella is free for the catering. He said he'd left a voicemail for the cake woman."

"Has she called him back yet? If not, she totally slipped me her personal number on the way out. I can make a call."

Jethro rolled his eyes. "Really, Abs?"

"I haven't used it! You know that I don't turn down good attention when it's aimed my way. Hell, even Tim knows that."

Jethro grunted at Abby and shook his head. "Thanks for hunting down the dates. I need to get back upstairs in case Amira wakes up from her nap. There's sharp tools out on the dining room table."

"Oh, yeah. That wouldn't be good."

"Bye, Abs." Jethro headed upstairs, deciding to move the stuff from the cake topper project back to the basement where it belonged. He hadn't been much fun for Amira today, but his head was somewhere else entirely. He got distant when he grieved. He knew that's what his funk that day had been about. He got like this. He'd get distant, and then clingy, and then distant, and then clingy. It was his modus operandi for dealing with losing someone he cared about. His solace hadn't really been found in the wood, but in the way that Amira was just like him. She was clingy in the morning, then distant, and then clingy and wanted Tony, and then distant again. It was like she kept checking in to make sure they were still there, but she really wanted to be left alone otherwise. That was okay with him. It's exactly how he felt, and he understood it completely.

When she fell asleep he was relieved. She'd gotten clingy again, and he was feeling less and less emotional until it was like someone had flipped the switch and turned it off. He'd been holding her, but neither of them were saying anything. To have her fall asleep was the best thing that could've happened to either of them. There was so much to figure out and he needed to think, not feel.

He took the cake topper stuff downstairs and then grabbed a notebook to sit down at the table and make a list. It was all of the things that needed to get done in the next month, from finding Amira a babysitter to finishing the cake topper. He put a T or a J next to certain things that were tasks identified already for one of them to take responsibility for, but half of the list was left unassigned. Find a new team member, J. Get a wedding cake, T. Find a babysitter for Amira, blank. There was getting Amira a new pediatrician on this side of town, getting her records transferred from her old one, getting a lawyer to finalize the adoption, getting someone to perform the wedding ceremony, rewriting their wills, learning to cook things that weren't frozen or from a can, or at least healthier things that were frozen or from a can, take Amira to the pick out a flower girl dress for the wedding, get their clothes for the wedding, research activities for Amira like swimming lessons, go grocery shopping, and somewhere in there he wanted to get something for the back yard to occupy Amira like a sandbox or swing set.

He tore the sheet off and stuck it on the fridge with a magnet Tony had of some Palm Trees that he'd picked up from some island they stopped at when he and the frat brothers used to take spring break cruises. He poured a fresh cup of coffee and looked out the back window again. Tony would be home any minute now.

Visions of the night before on the couch came back to him. He'd felt the need to be close to Tony like he needed to breathe. Now the idea of holding the man was having an even more feral effect on him. He turned around and added another item to the list on the fridge.

Put doorknob with lock on bedroom door

He put his initial next to it, and he knew that the next day would involve a trip to the hardware store. As he thought about it, that could kill two birds with one stone, and he could get the sandbox for Amira. He'd seen them sitting outside of the lawn and garden area in different shapes and sizes. She'd be able to pick out which one she'd want. Once again he was happy that he'd kept his sensible truck and treated it well. He'd be able to bring it home for her right away.

"Hel-" Tony started and then saw that Amira was asleep on the couch and stopped. Jethro came to the dining room doorway and saw Tony with a box coming at him. Jethro sat his mug down on the table, took the box from Tony as it was handed to him, ignored what he was saying and pulled him in for a fiery kiss. Tony's arms went around his neck in surprise, and after a moment of shock kissed him back desperately.

When they finally pulled away, Tony felt weak in the knees. "If Amira wasn't right there I'd take you on this table right here and now," Jethro whispered into his ear.

"Yes, please," Tony said a little roughly. "What's brought this on?"

"So much happening lately that I haven't been able to spend enough time with you," Jethro said, running his nose up the side of Tony's neck and into his hair as he inhaled him. Tony's eyes closed. He could hear the possessiveness in Jethro's voice and he relished in it.

"We need to spend some time together. Time to find the babysitter," Tony said. "I wonder if Amira would let Abby watch her for a date night this week."

"Mmmm… might be a little too soon for that, but I love the way you think," Jethro said, nipping at Tony's neck and then suddenly spinning to release the man and put distance between them. He picked up his cup of coffee and took a deep breath to clear his mind before he realized there was a box in front of him. He vaguely remembered taking it from Tony when he came in. "What's this?"

"Agent files," Tony said. "I had Tim and Ziva go through them and remove the agents they wouldn't work with already."

Tony headed for the kitchen to get a cup of coffee. Jethro followed him to check on dinner.

"Dorney's file ended up in there. Looks like our assumptions were right though," Tony said, taking a peek at dinner to find out what it was.

"He changed his mind about transferring teams?" Jethro asked, sliding the casserole back in the oven for another few minutes.

"You'd be proud of me. I didn't even think about saying 'I told you so'."

"Daddy?" Amira said from the doorway holding Dirt.

"Hey, Munchkin!" Tony said, reaching out for her. She ran up to him and rubbed her eyes at the same time. He scooped her up and she leaned into him.

"I missed you," she said with a yawn.

"I missed you, too," he said with a kiss to her cheek. "Were you good for Daddy Gibbsy today?"

She nodded, looking at Jethro and then back at Tony.

"She was very good. You want to tell Tony what you did today?" he asked her.

"I watched cartoons, and played with my light light, and I made pictures."

"Your light light? Tony asked her, looking over at Jethro.

"Her Lite Brite," he said with a chuckle.

"Oh!" Tony said with a smile and nod. "Did you make a dog with a blue nose?"

"No!" Amira said with a smile and giggle. Tony watched her with glee as he remembered the day he introduced her to the toy. It was the last time he'd seen Leyla alive. A heaviness took ahold of his heart.

"Why don't you go put Dirt in your room and get ready for dinner. It shouldn't take much longer," Jethro said.

Tony nodded. "Sounds good. We don't need Dirt to get dirty."

"But he wants to eat dinner, too!" Amira said, holding her arms out like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"He can't have people food. He needs to be tucked in anyway," Tony said, sitting her down. "Go put him to bed and tell him you'll be in after your bath."

"Bubble bath!" she said with a shout of celebration. She grabbed the bear and ran for the stairs, suddenly forgetting that she didn't want to be parted with it at the thought of some time in the tub.

"She's so-" Tony was suddenly pushed against the wall in the kitchen. Jethro was kissing him senseless, his hands working their way up into Tony's hair. Tony kissed him back, clawing at his chest, trying to find his breath. He didn't know what was getting into Jethro tonight, but he was loving every second of it. Every time Jethro opened this door he wanted to walk through it immediately, run through it, jump through it, dance through it, but it kept slamming shut. Explosions of lust amidst parenting. Jethro jerked away again, but Tony was hard as a rock and pulled him back towards him with a low moan.

"Tonight, we're barricading the door, and you're going to do everything you're thinking about doing to me. Understood?" Tony said fiercely.

Jethro nodded, leaning down to kiss Tony again. The kiss was slow and deep compared to the passionate frenzy they'd just been in, and Amira's announcement of cooties only caused the kiss to end, but they didn't pull away from each other.

"Cooties just mean that we love each other very, very, very much," Tony said, looking deeply into Jethro's eyes with a smile before looking over at Amira who was jumping in place in the doorway. He thought for a moment that their relationship wasn't something that Amira had ever been exposed to at all. Leyla had been single for the entirety of Amira's life until she passed. Amira had never seen her kiss someone romantically, had never watched a loving relationship as closely as she would growing up around him and Jethro. He smiled to himself as he realized that was one thing that they could give her- a healthy outlook on relationships.

"I need to take dinner out," Jethro said, leaning in to give Tony a quick kiss before letting him go. Tony chased down Amira and she squealed, taking off for the living room. He picked her up, spun her around and held her closely.

"Have you washed your hands yet?" he asked. She shook her head no. "Okay. Let's do that." They went back into the kitchen and Tony sat her on the counter next to the sink. He turned on the water, and then squeezed soap in her hands. "Now get them a little wet and then pull back and suds them up really good, then stick them back under the water and keep sudsing them… okay, good. Now let the water rinse the bubbles off. You're a natural!"

"I know how to wash my hands! I'm a big girl!" she reminded him.

"Of course you are. Silly me! How could I have forgotten," he said with a smile. He'd seen Amira's version of washing her hands, and it usually ended up with the sink full of water and the bar of soap floating in it until it's a mushy mess. He handed her a dishtowel to dry her hands with, then lifted her off the counter before he washed his own hands and took the towel back to dry them. "You want to help me set the table?" he asked her.

When she nodded he took silverware out of the drawer for him and Jethro and a plastic spoon and fork out that had animals on the ends of them for Amira. They'd come from Leyla's house, and Tony made sure to pay attention to whether or not that was a comfort or a negative reminder for the little girl. She didn't seem fazed, and turned to go put them all on the table. Tony came in with plates and sat them down at the three places Amira laid out for them. He returned to the kitchen and Jethro was filling one of Amira's plastic cups with milk.

"Milk?" he asked Tony.

"No, thanks. I'm going to do water and my coffee." Tony reached to take the milk from Jethro though and put it back in the fridge and take out a bottle of water. He tucked the water under his arm as he grabbed a mug in each hand and followed Jethro to the dining room with the casserole. They were just sitting down at the table when his phone rang. He looked at it to see a familiar number, but he didn't know whose it was.

"Special Agent Tony DiNozzo," he answered, his eyes squinted slightly as he focused on the voice that came through. Once he realized who it was he smiled brightly. "Hi, Sully! Thanks for getting back to me."

"July 21st or 29th," Jethro said as he dished out dinner.

"Yeah. We've had some things happen, and we wanted to move it up," Tony said, holding up a finger as he got up and moved out onto the back deck, thankful that the rain had stopped. He closed the door behind him and sighed. "A friend of ours passed, and we're raising her daughter now."

He listened patiently through the apologies and condolences.

"Thank you. We want to move the ceremony up so that we can be married by time we get a court date for the adoption. It would make things a lot easier on us. The venue we wanted is available on July 21st or the 29th. Would either of those be possible?" he asked with a grimace, knowing she was probably too booked.

"Your cake is actually rather simple," Sully reassured him. "I shouldn't have any problems getting it made for either of those dates. The only thing is that I have another wedding on the 21st. We'd have to deliver it to the venue incredibly early that morning, or possibly even the night before."

"That is not a problem!" Tony said. He didn't know if it would be or not, but he would make it not a problem if it took everything in him.

"Wonderful! Then we're still good. Just call me as soon as possible with the firmed up date if you would."

"I'll call you tomorrow," Tony said with a smile. "Thank you!"

They disconnected the call and Tony went back into the house, joining his family for dinner excitedly. "Sully can still do our cake!" he announced.

"That's great, Tony!" Jethro said, getting up just enough to lean over the corner of the table and kiss him chastely.

"I'll call Marcella after dinner. She's probably going to let it go to voicemail, but at least she'll get the message," he said with a smile as he cut up his chicken. He looked over at Amira's plate to see that Jethro had already cut hers up, and she was eating it with a fork in her fist. He smirked and looked up at Jethro, who smirked back. They were eventually going to have to teach her to use her fork correctly, but for now it was working for her, and she was content, so they let her be.

"I made a list of things that need to be done over the next month," Jethro said. "It's on the fridge."

"Want to go over it now or wait?" Tony asked.

"It can wait until tomorrow, but no later," Jethro said, looking at Amira. Tony got the point and tucked another piece of chicken in his mouth.

"This is good," he said after he swallowed. "I still find myself surprised when you cook things that didn't involve an open fire." He ducked the headslap that was coming his way and chuckled.

They ate their dinner with playful banter between the three of them, and then Tony took Amira upstairs to get her bath while Jethro cleaned up the kitchen. Once Amira was in her bath water, Tony sighed and headed for the bedroom to finally get out of his suit. He didn't realize he hadn't changed until he was sitting down to eat, and he knew that from now on changing when he got home would be a luxury. He knew he was going to have to buy some more kid-friendly clothes for work.

Tony tried to call Marcella, and as expected had to leave a voicemail. He was lying back on the bed with some shorts and a tshirt on listening for any mishaps in the bathroom when Jethro came in. He didn't say a word, but came over to Tony and crawled up so that he was straddling him.

"Why hel-" Tony started when Jethro bent down and kissed him hard. Tony kissed him back and leaned up into the older man's embrace. It was passionate, and Tony was afraid they wouldn't be able to stop this time. Tony's hands went to slide up under Jethro's tshirt, feeling his stomach muscles and groaning. He was becoming achingly hard very quickly, and Jethro bucked his ass over him, making him moan. "Jethro…"

"Sshhh…"

Tony nodded, unsure of what he was agreeing to. He was on fire from head to toe, and all he wanted was Jethro to tell him to flip over and take him.

"When she goes to sleep, you're getting cuffed to this bed, and I'm going to take out every bit of frustration out on you. I'm going to prep you now so that you're ready for me later." Tony's breath hitched while Jethro reached over into the nightstand for the lube and flipped open the cap. He coated three fingers and reached his hand up the leg of Tony's shorts. Tony lifted his right leg in the air, pulling it to his chest and holding it there with an arm around the crook of his knee. It gave Jethro the easy access he needed.

Jethro started with one finger, slipping it easily into Tony's puckering hole. Tony let out a sigh of contentment, and then moaned as Jethro added a second. Those two fingers were used to stretch him every which way until he loosened around them. Once he was relaxed, Jethro added the third finger which made Tony moan loudly.

"Sshhh!" Jethro reminded him. Tony nodded briskly and Jethro suddenly reached for Tony's prostate. He reached up and clamped a hand over Tony's mouth as he opened it to react. He kept his left hand on Tony's mouth while his right hand toyed with his prostate before pulling out of him. "I think that's enough for now." He got up and headed for the bathroom to wash his hands, leaving Tony to lay on the bed gasping for breath and hard as a rock.

Jethro came back in and stared at Tony's body lying on the bed, his dick at attention, his chest heaving in panted breaths. "If I could capture this moment…" he began and then trailed off.

"You mean this moment of me lying here wanting you, desperate for you to fuck me, desperate for your hands, your mouth, anything on my cock? That moment?" Tony reached into his shorts and gave himself a long couple of strokes while Jethro watched.

"We've gotta find a babysitter," Jethro said, entranced. He blinked, sighed and shook his head. "You need to go get her out of the tub. The water's probably cold by now."

"Annnnd it's lost," Tony said as his erection subsided almost immediately as he thought about getting Amira tucked in.

Jethro reached out his hands to help Tony up from the bed, and as he got to his feet found himself pressed against Jethro's body. "I'll help you find it again very soon," he said roughly into Tony's ear.

"Yeah, we need to find a babysitter."

"I'm going to go grab something we can wedge this door with for a while. I'm picking up a new doorknob tomorrow with a lock on it."

"Oh, thank god!" Tony said, leaning his head on Jethro's shoulder. "I feel so guilty! It's not that I don't want her to come in and sleep with us, it's just that we need our time, and no matter how sweet and amazing it is that she's so willing to let us take care of her, sometimes I just need us to take care of each other."

Jethro nodded and sighed. He was relieved to hear that Tony was feeling the same thing he was feeling. He loved it when Amira crawled up into bed with them as they slept. It reminded him of times with Kelly, and to protect his little girl while she was sleeping was a father's right, but he needed some time alone with Tony desperately where he could let the walls down. He hadn't realized how badly he'd come to need that since they'd gotten together, but the strong front he'd had to carry over the past week was wearing him down, and he needed the security and safety Tony provided to fall apart.

"Go ahead and get her out," Jethro said, kissing Tony's temple and stepping away as they let go of each other. He figured a folding chair from the basement would be the right size to wedge against the door, so he headed down to the basement to get one.

Tony went into the bathroom and announced that it was time to get out. Amira had the water turned white with the dissolved bar of soap. He realized the water was cold when he went to pull the plug.

"How about we rinse off with some warm water first? You have soap all over you. Sound good?" Tony started getting the water warm again and Amira stood up as the shower came on. Tony pulled the curtain closed for a minute and told her to rinse all the soap off. She giggled under the spray and splashed around in the water that hadn't completely receded yet in the tub.

"Hey now! No splashing. Just rinse off. Time to get to bed. You had lots of extra tub time tonight."

"I played mermaids!" she said happily.

"Mermaids?" Tony thought about her toys that she and Jethro had picked out to put in the bathroom with her and nodded to himself.

"Yeah! They sing the pretty songs and swim around together. But two-two of them got their tails tangled and we had to sing a special song to save them!"

"Oh, okay," Tony said with a small smile. This is what my life is now… mermaid songs and bath time.

"All done!" she said.

Tony pulled back the curtain and turned off the water, then picked up the bath towel and wrapped it around her, making sure to rub her head partially dry. He'd had some pretty hefty curls as a kid, but he didn't do anything but pick out the fuzz. Amira's curls were different. They were soft, loose, and they tangled easily. He had no clue what to do with them. He contemplated asking Ziva what to do with them, or maybe Abby. He needed a woman's advice for that one. Tony had seen pictures of Kelly, and Jethro was just as confused having only worked with straight locks while raising the little girl.

He helped Amira get her nightgown on when her arm went through the wrong hole and he smiled at the exasperated sigh she released. This was an ongoing problem of knowing which holes got the arms and which one got the head. He found it adorable. He contemplated what he wanted to say and decided not to. He was going to ask if Leyla has done anything special with her hair after a bath, but he was afraid that if he asked he would be opening up a can of grief that would kick their asses.

Jethro came to stand in the doorway of the small bathroom. "Are we ready for bed?" he asked, looking Tony in the eyes instead of looking at Amira. Tony noted the fire he saw there and smirked.

"All ready," he said, winking at Jethro. Jethro smirked back.

The two led Amira into her room. Jethro pulled the blankets on right and set the stuffed animals off to the side. Amira jumped up into the bed with a yawn, and Tony and Jethro raised an eyebrow at that good sign. They tucked her in and gave her hugs. There was a breeze blowing in through the curtains and a dog was barking a few doors down. The sun was going down and shadows were long across the room. By time they got to the door and Tony turned around to pull the door mostly shut, Amira was sighing with her eyes closed, settling down to sleep.

Once they were both in their bedroom, Jethro wedged the chair under the doorknob and tried to get the door opened. It worked perfectly. He turned to find Tony naked, his clothes in a pile on the floor. He smirked and reached to pull his own shirt off over his head. He took a few steps towards Tony as he unbuttoned his cargo pants and pushed them and his boxers down, kicking them off as he reached him.

Tony reached for him, pulling him against him and thrusting lazily against him as he pressed his lips to his. Jethro took control of the kiss immediately, his fingers going up into Tony's hair and pulling as Tony moaned. He needed this, and badly.

Jethro reached for Tony's cock and stroked it until it was half hard. Then he stopped and moved for the nightstand, opening the drawer. He found the cockring and turned back to Tony, slipping it over the length of Tony's dick and continued his stroking while Tony groaned. "Are you going to behave for me?" Jethro asked Tony roughly in his ear. Tony nodded fervently. "Are you going to be quiet, or do I need to gag you?" Tony's cock jumped in Jethro's hand and Jethro pulled back looking into Tony's eyes as he smirked. "You like that idea." Tony's eyes rolled up into his head for a moment and then looked back into Jethro's. "We'll have to look into that."

Tony reached for Jethro's cock, needing to feel its weight in his hands, needing to touch him. Jethro made a noise of appreciation low in his chest. "You have very talented fingers, but that's not what I want. Lay down on the bed." Tony let go and lay down on the bed. Jethro took his cuffs out of the nightstand and bent over Tony's body, taking his wrists and cuffing them around one of the rungs in the headboard.

That warm fuzzy feeling started in the back of Tony's head that always happened when Jethro took over like this during sex. It was like drifting off to a happy place where he could still feel everything being done to him. He watched as Jethro slicked his cock and climbed up onto the bed, pushing Tony's legs aside and bent over to kiss him. It was a filthy kiss, all tongues and teeth, and it made Tony's hips thrust up off the bed. Jethro's hand was quick to push him back down, but the kissing didn't stop. Without warning, Jethro slid into him in one smooth motion, bottoming out.

"Fuck-" *kiss* "yes!" Tony got out between the tongue wrestling. He tried to move his hands to keep Jethro's face connected to his, but he couldn't. The cuffs bit into his wrists and he remembered he was immobile. Jethro sat up, raking his nails down Tony's torso as he thrust into him hard. He twisted Tony's nipples for good measure on the way down, and Tony melted back against the bed, throwing his head back.

Jethro thrust in and out of him over and over again. His strokes were hard and fast, and Tony took each one as a well as the last. He lifted Tony's legs in the air and then bent him at the waist so that he was a v-shape. "So damned good," he muttered. "How's that cockring feel?" he asked with a smirk. Tony shivered at the almost sadistic tone to the question. If the increased speed and force of Jethro's thrusting was anything to go by Tony believed that he was getting off to the fact that Tony was restricted from getting off. He decided to add to the tension.

"It's so tight. My cock's on fire," he said while watching Jethro's face and seeing the reaction he wanted. "I want to come so bad." It was true. Tony was pulsating. He felt the restraint of the ring around him like a medieval torture device, which only served to turn him on even more. A stifled sound escaped Jethro as he lost control, fucking Tony mercilessly. Tony's legs were released and he wrapped them around Jethro's waist, pulling him even closer with each thrust.

"Yes! Yes! Yes!" he kept gasping through the torrent. Jethro suddenly stopped and threw his head back, his nails digging into Tony's thighs. A few more jerky thrusts and he was unloading into Tony.

"Please Jethro! Let me come! Please!" Tony begged as he yanked on the cuffs and gasped in desperation for release of some sort.

Jethro collapsed down on him, stroking him slowly and lazily as he enjoyed the haze of his orgasm. He kissed Tony slowly, and Tony shivered with need. "Please Jethro? I need for you to take the cockring off and let me come. Please?"

"But I like it there," Jethro said almost playfully as he continued to stroke Tony's swollen dick.

"Oh, god Jethro! Don't make me safeword out of this! I need this too damn badly to play tonight!"

"Fair enough," Jethro said, pressing the release on the ring and watching it spring open. He started fast pulls and strokes, letting his palm coast over the head of Tony's cock, smearing the precum there.

"Yes!" Tony gasped, arching off the bed and into his touch. "Fuck yes!" He thrust up into Jethro's hand over and over again. Suddenly the orgasm rushed over him with barely any warnings that it was coming. He yelped despite himself and geysered all over Jethro's fist. It was an explosive release and he saw stars for a long time afterwards as he and Jethro lay together panting.

After a long few minutes, Jethro undid the cuffs and helped rub the feeling back into Tony's arms. He kissed him slowly and nuzzled him. They held each other, kissing lazily, touching each other tenderly, and simply enjoyed being close.

"I feel like we're refilling the tanks," Tony said softly.

"Me too," Jethro said, nipping at Tony's chin. "Never going to be full enough."

"Mmm…" Tony hummed. "Isn't that the truth."

"We should probably clean up and put clothes back on," Jethro said with a sigh.

"Yeah," Tony agreed reluctantly. "But afterwards, it's right back here where we can go back to doing this."

"Deal."

They got up and went to the bathroom, rinsing only briefly in the shower, kissing for a moment or two under the water as they did so. They returned to the bedroom and got dressed in some shorts, and then Jethro unwedged the chair from the door, sitting it off to the side. "In case she wakes up," he said with a shrug.

Once under the blanket, Jethro pulled Tony to him tightly, burying his head against the younger man's chest. He listened to Tony's heart beating and nuzzled the soft hair over his pec. Tony ran his fingers through Jethro's short hair over and over again silently as he let Jethro process what he was feeling.

"I love the sound of your heartbeat," Jethro said a long time later with a quietly rough voice.

Tony stayed silent and waited.

"It means you're alive, and I really need you."

Tony bent to kiss the top of Jethro's head. "I really need you, too," he said, holding Jethro tightly. "I can't imagine my life without you."

"I don't know what I'd do if I lost you," Jethro said. Tony felt something tickle his chest, and he suddenly realized that it was a tear dripping from Jethro. It was the second time the older man had cried in the past two days, and it broke Tony's heart. They'd been through a lot together, but nothing as hard as the past week.

"You're never going to have to find out," Tony said. "We're being extra careful now, and we're going to be fine. We're going to raise that beautiful little girl in there together until she grows up, graduates from a good college, gets married and gives us grandkids. We'll be old and crotchety together, sipping beers and bourbon around the fireplace, and growling at the TV. We'll have surprise anniversary parties thrown for us by our teams, and we'll shout at each other in the car when we're losing our hearing and going to doctor's appointments together when we're so old and falling apart that you're using a cane and I'm using a walker… And one day, we're going to die in our sleep together, because my heart is going to know when yours can't take it anymore, and they're going to give up at the same time."

Jethro tightened his hold around Tony and nodded. He knew he should feel ashamed for losing it like this, but it was Tony. He could do things like this with Tony and he didn't think any less of him. He could let it all come out and Tony would protect him. It was one of the most incredible gifts he'd ever been given. He was able to share these moments of pure, honest emotion with him, and it only strengthened their bond.

"I love you, Jethro," Tony whispered.

"I love you, too," Jethro replied.

They laid together for a long time, wide awake as they listened to each other breathe. It was reassuring, and it affirmed something in Jethro that he needed but couldn't explain. He'd watched so much death and destruction in his life, but then Tony came along and he started seeing vibrant goodness again. It slowly built up into this way of life that he had now, and he really didn't want to let it go. There were smiles, and laughter, and hope, and he dared to even accept that he was happy again. The problem with being happy is that it can all be taken from you, and Jethro was more aware of that than most. Tony's strong heartbeat under his ear gave him strength though, and he eventually fell asleep with a small smile on his face, and that thump-thump in his ear.