The next week was an exhausting one. Between interrogations with the Central 46 and the Soutaicho, visiting her brother and checking on his recuperation, and trying to heal herself while having people ask her the most outrageous things about her and Kyouraku's relationship, Nanao was about ready to scream. Which probably explained why she was on the warpath when she woke up to her entire apartment coated in a layer of rose petals. That pink wearing idiot was giving her the key back to her own home or so help her, she was going to use her recovering reiatsu and blast him into the living world.
As she stormed into the 8th, she realized belatedly that it was the first time she'd been back since she went into hiding. She'd of course seen most of them at the bar party, but she hadn't been into the office since she'd been back. It wasn't that she'd been avoiding the 8th, but she'd been honestly concerned that when she came into the office she'd suddenly be thrown into the midst of a surprise wedding for herself or something of the sort. Stranger things had happened in their division. So far so good.
Squad members called out greetings as she passed into the 8th, and she did her best to acknowledge them while still moving forward. Just because their Taicho was an idiot didn't mean it should be taken out on them. She moved into the hallway and frowned at the blown out light on the ceiling. She'd have to mention it to Kyouraku after she got her key back. Walking in to the front of the office the secretaries' heads shot up, and she was quickly surrounded as they all jabbered at her at once. At least it was a slight distraction from the fact that the entire office was covered in piles of paperwork. "Where's Kyouraku?" she hissed not bothering to cover her irritation.
"Uh, I think he's napping," one of the secretaries supplied as all of them backed off. They'd seen this mood often enough to know Kyouraku was in trouble. "Sorry it's a little messy."
"I'm sure it isn't your fault," Nanao said and meant it. Her eyes narrowed as the office door flew open,
"Nanao-chan!" Kyouraku said walking out and spreading his arms wide. He'd already replaced his pink haori with a new one and looked as ridiculous as ever. "I thought I felt your sweet reiatsu storming the gates. Good to see it's recovering." The secretary next to her started gesturing wildly and Nanao didn't soften her gaze. "What is it?" he asked turning his curious look on the little secretary.
"She is more than likely trying to inform you that you have a piece of paperwork stuck to your chest, sir," Nanao said coldly.
He glanced down and laughed good-naturedly removing the form and saying, "So I do."
Nanao stormed past him and pushed the office doors open wider. Her mouth literally fell open at the amount of paperwork stacked up in ramshackle piles. "Did you do anything to the paperwork besides sleep on it?" she demanded coldly.
"Urhm," he said slowly from behind her. "The stacks are pretty much by date received…"
"We've done most of the necessary ones, Ise-san," one of the secretaries supplied. "I mean a lot of that is just summaries and reports of 8th missions."
"And the budget?" Nanao asked feeling a headache forming.
"Er, well we just signed off on whatever was necessary," the secretary said looking guilty.
"The training schedules and interdivisional assessments?" she asked quietly.
"Well, no not really," a different secretary supplied. "People have mainly been training when it suits their schedule.
"By necessary ones, what forms exactly have you been filling out?" Nanao asked quietly.
"You know," the secretary said shifting uncomfortably on her feet.
"The ones that get food delivered to the mess and sake ordered for parties, I would assume," Nanao said trying to remind herself to breath.
"There may have been a few of those," the girls offered inching backwards.
"Kyouraku-san," Nanao said holding the cold rage in her tone.
"Yes, darling?" he asked trying to discreetly shut the door in front of her.
"Give me the key to my apartment," she said holding out her hand impatiently.
"Oh no!" one of the girls wailed behind her. "Oh, Ise-san you can't dump him just because of the paperwork. We'll all help get back on track." The other secretaries nodded hopefully.
"I'm not dumping him because we were never dating," Nanao said not lowering her hand. "And I only want the key back that he shouldn't have even had in the first place."
"You aren't mad about the paperwork?" he asked cocking his head to the side.
"I'm not your fukutaicho," she said simply. "The paperwork isn't my problem. The key, sir."
"But Nanao-chan, I need that key," he whined reaching for her hand and pulling her into an unwanted hug. She struggled as he asked, "Didn't you like my surprise?"
"It was annoying and intrusive," she said firmly, stepping down hard on his foot and making him jump back with a grin. "It was also a bother to clean up."
"Don't lie," he chastised. "You burnt them up in five seconds with kido."
"Yes," she said angrily, "and now there is a thin layer of ash over my entire apartment thanks to you."
"I'll come over and help you clean it tonight," he suggested comfortably.
"No," she said firmly. "I just want my key, and then you should actually do some work."
"Nanao-chan," he whined. "Working is boring. I'd much rather spend my time with you. He reached for her again, and she grabbed a day planner off the desk behind her to whack his hands away.
"Where is my key?" she demanded.
He smiled saucily and said, "It's on my person. Do you want to search me for it?"
"You are impossible," she said throwing her hands up. "I'm getting the locks changed tomorrow." That said she turned on her heel and stomped out of the room, ignoring the secretaries saying how cute they were.
She got halfway down the hall before she was pushed bodily through a door and into a darkened storage closet. Nanao began to ask her Taicho what the hell he thought he was doing, but a hand was firmly clamped over her mouth.
"Shhh, Nanao-chan," he said in a strained whisper. "It's a matter of life and death."
She glared at him in the dark not caring if he couldn't see it. She turned her head quickly, trying to get free of his hand, but he followed easily. Seeing no other option she licked his palm.
That just earned her a small quiet chuckle. "You really think I mind if you lick me anywhere, Nanao-chan?" he asked softly. She reached up with both her hands and tugged on his arm, finally resorting to shocking him with a kido spell. "Nanao-chan! Don't use kido, then she'll be able to find us!" he reprimanded in a harsh whisper.
"Who exactly are we hiding from?" she demanded whispering all the same. "If it's some jilted lover of yours I couldn't care less." She made a motion towards the exit and Kyouraku quickly used his body to herd her up against the door of the cramped storage room and effectively stopped her from getting it open.
"It's much worse then an ex," Kyouraku said seriously.
"I don't see how any of this has to do with me," she said trying to adjust herself further away from him and only succeeding in brushing up against him more as he moved with her wriggling. His knee, placed tightly between her legs and pinning her against the door, was certainly not doing good things for her ability to think.
"I felt my mother's reiatsu," he whispered leaning even closer as he put his ear to the door beside her head and listened. Their bodies had way too much contact, and she could only hope he missed the way it made her squirm.
"Oh," Nanao said, finally understanding his overdone level of dramatics. He always got this way when his family came to visit. "Still not my problem," she said searching blindly with her hand for the door handle. "You're mother just ignores my existence for the most part. I much prefer her to your dad or your brother. Now get off of me, and hide here by yourself."
He grabbed her hand just as it found the handle and stopped it, turning his head to whisper hotly in her ear. "It's your problem now too."
"How so?" she asked hoping he didn't hear the breathy way it came out, and probably in the past he wouldn't have commented on it. At least, not directly.
"Is Nanao-chan uncomfortable trapped here with me?" he asked in a gleeful tone that made her want to punch him in the gut. He molded himself more firmly against her, which she hadn't thought was possible, and she felt his lips leave a trail of soft butterfly kisses on her neck working his way down to her collarbone.
"This is some stupid set up, isn't it?" she asked struggling to get away from him and to get her remaining free hand on to the door handle.
"No," he murmured, easily trapping her hand in his and pinning it next to her head on the door. "I really am hiding us from my mother. Hiding just happens to come with more benefits then it did in the past." He kissed her throat again, only this time it wasn't teasing or light, and she was pretty sure he could hear her heart thumping wildly. She should really be pushing him away, but her watery arms and legs weren't working too well with her brain currently. In fact she was pretty grateful that his leg was wedged so perfectly between her own legs or she was pretty sure she'd be falling down.
"Why would your mother suddenly care about finding me?" she asked trying to ignore his lips on her pulse, which she was now sure he knew was racing, and regain some semblance of control. One good kido spell and she could be on her way home, calling a locksmith.
"She heard the rumors," Kyouraku sighed, stopping his assault on her neck. "Jyuu also may have told me that she came to him and interrogated him until he cracked."
"There are always rumors about you," she pointed out glad her thought process was slowly returning from the dizzying place it had been going.
"Never any that say I seriously proposed to a woman and told her I want her to bear my children," Kyouraku said, dropping one of her hands and instead cupping the side of her face.
"And your mother has only been trying to marry you off and get grandkids for as long as I've known you," Nanao said with a sigh.
"Exactly," Kyouraku said stroking a thumb over her lips. Kami she should be beating the crap out of him, what was wrong with her? "My mother doesn't care about class so much like my brother and father do as long as it's a fertile woman who I'm settling down with."
"Then we just explain that it's the joke that it is," Nanao said trying to steel herself against how warm she felt in all the places his body was touching hers.
"No joke," he whispered sincerely. "Which mean we have to avoid her for the rest of our lives. Difficult, but not impossible." He started leaning down towards her and Nanao began to panic. His caresses and torturously playful kisses on the throat were one thing, but lip to lip contact was quite another. If he really kissed her, and she let him, she knew she'd be done. Hook, line, and sinker, he'd have her. And then shortly there after would come the painful crash and burn part.
"Kyouraku Taicho," she almost whimpered out.
"Shunsui," he corrected getting closer to her. She watched him like a startled dear and prayed some of her protective instincts were going to kick in soon. A millimeter from her mouth the door to the storage room went flying open and with nothing to support them her and Kyouraku landed in a heap on the ground.
"You horny bastard," a chastising voice said from above them. "What has it been? A week since you proposed to that girl and you're already cheating on her with some tramp in the closet? I knew it was too good to be true. Why would a sensible girl like Ise-san ever say yes to a lout like you?"
"Nice to see you too, mom," Kyouraku grumbled from on top of Nanao.
"Don't you mom me," the woman said in full on tirade mode. "My one shot at grandchildren and you go and screw it up with a floozy. You'd think you could knock at least one of them up. An illegitimate grandchild is better than none at all. Oh kami, you aren't infertile are you?"
"Mom!" he yelled mortified as he got up and started helping Nanao to her feet.
"What? It's a legitimate question. With all the women you've slept with there wasn't one time where the kido contraceptive went wrong or you forgot to use it? You don't have problems climaxing, do you? I've heard some men have that problem. Fuji-san's nephew did. You really should see that nice healer Retsu-san if so, because you're never going to get a woman pregnant if you don't."
"Mom, for kami sake, please stop talking," Kyouraku begged reaching out and grabbing Nanao's wrist as she tried to discreetly sneak down the hallway. The action finally drove his mother's attention to her and she saw the woman's eyes go wide.
"Ise-san," his mother noted, suddenly smiling a Cheshire smile that was much too much like her son's. "So you were in the closet with Shu-kun."
"Now it's Shu-kun?" Kyouraku asked disgruntled.
"It's nice to see you again, Kyouraku-dono," Nanao said blushing and giving the woman a polite bow.
"You as well, Ise-san," his mother said grinning crazily as her eyes strayed to Nanao's neck. If Kyourku had left marks on her throat, Nanao was seriously going to hurt him. "What is wrong with you?" his mother demanded, slapping Kyouraku over the back of the head as she again turned her wrath on him. "Standing up in a closet is no way to get a girl pregnant. You have to let gravity work with you. A pillow under her hips works best."
"Kill me now," Kyouraku said miserably.
"Now you know how I feel being embarrassed by you on a daily basis," Nanao said glaring next to him.
"Although I had a friend that had her daughter-in-law lay legs up head down towards the ground on the couch for twenty minutes after sex. She was knocked up in one week! Have you tried that yet?" she asked, turning her attention on Nanao.
"Kyouraku-dono, I think you may have gotten the wrong impression of our relationship," Nanao said shifting uncomfortably under the older woman's critical gaze.
"Oh no!" his mother yelled clutching at her heart just as dramatically as her son ever had. "Don't tell me you haven't even gotten her into bed. Shunsui, what is wrong with you? If you can't even seduce her into sleeping with you how do you ever plan to get her to marry you? Do I have to do everything? Come along dear."
Nanao's hand was instantly snatched by his mother who started dragging her down the hallway to do who knows what. She sent Kyouraku a panicked look over her shoulder, and saw him grinning deviously. He would enjoy being left out of this debacle and letting her be tortured alone through no fault of her own. "You can keep the key!" she yelled in a last ditch effort. His eyebrow went up and he quickly jogged down the hall catching up with them and pulling her close from the waist. It had the desired effect of stopping his mother and getting her to release her grasp.
"Mom, Nanao-chan is still recovering from injuries, more specifically she was whipped across her back," Kyouraku said easily. "I'm sure she can't do any of your techniques right now." Nanao really wanted to elbow him in the gut for not clarifying the whole situation, but refrained as she didn't want to get stuck with his mother for whatever she was planning.
His mother looked upset for a moment and then sighed. "I suppose it is what it is. Who wants to see a bride retaining water and getting morning sickness anyway? You can knock her up later if you must. Now about the wedding arrangements."
"What wedding arrangements?" Nanao asked turning pale.
"Well, we must start early, dear girl. A Kyouraku wedding doesn't happen in a day," his mother said rubbing her hands together.
"We're not getting married," Nanao said firmly.
"Well, make up your mind dear," his mother replied. "If you aren't planning on getting married then I don't see what the whole fuss is over getting pregnant later rather than sooner. While standing up isn't the best technique, it's been known to work. You just have to do it more often."
"Mother, could you stop talking about our sex life?" Kyouraku pleaded sincerely.
"Oh don't be such a baby, Shunsui, it's not like you have anything to hide. I walked in on you and the maid after all," his mother scolded, and Kyouraku looked like he was going to be sick. "Also up against a wall," she added honestly to Nanao. "Do you have a fetish or something?"
"Mom, for the love of everything sweet and innocent, please stop talking about this," he begged. "If anything you're making Nanao-chan want to marry me less."
"What? It's not like it's a bad thing," his mother said confused. "The maid gave you rave reviews. Your father certainly didn't have such a good track record. When I walked into that arranged marriage I honestly thought I was being condemned to missionary for the rest of my life."
"This is almost not worth the key," he grumbled to Nanao.
"Give it back then," she hissed.
"I said almost, Nanao-chan," he replied with a grin.
"What are the two of you going on about?" his mother asked eyeing them both warily.
"Nothing," they both chimed in simultaneously.
"Fine then," his mother said with a sniff, obviously not liking to be left out of the loop. "Shall we all go to lunch? We have a lot to plan."
"Actually Nanao-chan and I had lunch plans," Kyouraku put in, starting to move backwards with the arm still looped around her waist. "Sorry, mom. Another time I suppose."
"That's fine," his mother said, "I'll just join you."
"Mom," he started.
"Shunsui, there isn't a place in this city that won't expand your reservations for me," she said confidently. "Where to?"
"Uh," he answered intelligently.
"Nanao-san," a voice called from down the hallway. All three of their heads turned and found Ukitake strolling towards them.
"Ukitake Taicho," she said giving him a bow, well as much of a bow as she could manage with Kyouraku's arm still wrapped around her middle.
"The Soutaicho has requested your presence. Apparently he has a few more questions," Ukitake said calmly. "Kyouraku-dono," he added nodding to Kyouraku's mother.
Nanao was a little confused to say the least. She was pretty sure the Soutaicho had rescheduled the meeting with her this evening to tomorrow because of an audience he had with the King. Perhaps that had been cancelled and now he wanted to see her again. She really had not been looking forward to talking one on one with him. She glanced at Ukitake and saw a small devious smile playing on his lips.
"If you'll excuse us," he said kindly. "We mustn't be late for the Soutaicho. You understand."
"Always such a good boy, Jyuushiro-kun," Kyouraku's mother said smiling. "I wish you'd had more of an influence on my worthless boy. Speaking of, isn't it about time for you to be settling down too? Find a nice girl and start having children."
"If you stick around she'll tell you just how to go about doing it too," Kyouraku muttered looking green.
"I'm working on it," Ukitake said smoothly, "but then Shunsui-kun stole this beautiful lady and I've been left in a depression ever since." Nanao rolled her eyes and smiled at him comfortably.
"Oh, Jyuushiro-kun I do hope you aren't being serious," Kyouraku's mother said fretfully. "You'll always be able to get a nice respectable girl, but Nanao-san may be Shu-kun's last chance."
"Mom!" Kyouraku yelled again.
"What? It's true," his mother said evenly. "And you only have yourself to blame. Come on then, you're taking me to lunch now that you're free." That said the woman turned and started taking smart strides down the hallway.
"You could have gotten me out of it too," Kyouraku griped to Ukitake.
"Could have, but it would have been less believable," Ukitake said with a shrug. "Besides you and your big mouth are the reason she came to hunt me down and drag the information out of me in the first place. You can't imagine how painful it was to have her tell my entire division embarrassing childhood stories about me until I had to tell her that it was true and you really had proposed to Nanao-san."
"Trust me, I can imagine it. I used to have to live with it. I also just got lectured on how to impregnate Nanao-chan and had my manhood questioned by my mother," he replied.
"Right, yours is worse," Ukitake admitted. "Unfortunately, she's your family so you're stuck with her. Nanao-san hasn't been condemned to the same fate yet."
"Thank Kami," Nanao added. "Ukitake-san, you're my hero."
"I try," he replied grinning.
"You both are terrible friends," Kyouraku said with a pout.
"Shunsui!" his mother yelled from down the hall. "I don't have all day."
"Have fun," Nanao said with a wicked grin, intensely enjoying his discomfort. "Hope the key was worth it."
"Oh trust me, Nanao-chan," he said leaning down and stopping an inch from her face. "I'll make it worth it." He brushed his hand lightly down her throat, and she tried to suppress the shiver the touch had sent down her spine. Then he grinned at her deviously and went off down the hallway after his mother.
"I have a feeling whatever you just riled up wasn't a good thing," Ukitake said with a laugh.
"If I sleep with him will he give up?" she asked staring down the now empty hallway.
"Is that really what you want? For him to give up?" Ukitake inquired more seriously.
"I only asked if he would if I did," she said still not looking at the white haired man.
"I can't give you any guarantees Nanao-san," Ukitake said stepping up to stand beside her, "but I know Shunsui has never behaved about a girl like he has with you. You are truly unique in his heart."
"Probably because I'm the only one that hasn't given in to him," Nanao said glancing over at him.
"Maybe," Ukitake admitted. "Though we both know he's not actually that superficial, just a little impulsive."
Nanao sighed and turned more fully to smile over at him. "Thank you for saving me from what was probably going to be the most horrifying lunch of my life. I think I much preferred his mother when she ignored my existence and just harped on Kyouraku-san all day long."
"She tell you about the time she walked in on Shunsui and the maid?" Ukitake asked grinning. "She likes to tell all his dates that one."
"Yeah, I may have heard that," she said shaking her head.
"Shunsui was abstinent for months afterwards," Ukitake said with a laugh. "He said every time he had a girl with him all he could hear was his mother instructing him how to better angle the maid's leg."
"She didn't!" Nanao said unable to control a laugh.
"She most definitely did. My only suggestion is that if you do decide to give him a chance, don't get intimate anywhere even remotely near that woman," Jyuushiro said grinning. "Do you want to go get lunch somewhere? Then I'll drop you off over by the 4th to visit your brother. I have an appointment with Retsu-san anyway."
"Are you not feeling well?" she asked worriedly.
"I'm alright," he replied kindly. "Just a routine check up. Come on Nanao-san, let's go get some rumors started that you're cheating on Shunsui-kun with me."
"Can we whisper secretively and then laugh like we don't know anyone is watching?" Nanao asked playing along.
"Of course, and I'll even put my hand on your lower back when we exit the restaurant," he said conspiratorially.
Nanao let out a genuine laugh and took his proffered arm. "Will you hate me if I can't give him what he wants?" she asked as they stepped into the bright morning sun.
"How could I ever hate you?" he asked patting her hand hooked in the crook of his arm. "I'd like to see both of you happy, and if that's together then all the better, but if it's not then it's not. Shunsui isn't the only one who deserves to have the life he wants and chooses."
"Thank you, Jyuushiro-san," she said blushing lightly as she used his first name.
"You are always welcome," he answered sincerely.
A/N: I'm glad everyone enjoyed the last bonus chapter :) This was the original Chapter 43, minus a few tweaks, and it was one of my favorites to write. I quite enjoy Kyouraku's mother. Thanks for being patient with my update delay!
As always, please review!
