"Thanks again for doing this, Lisa", Amy said as she placed the diaper bag on the kitchen floor after handing Lyndy to her great-grandmother. "I really need to look into a babysitter or a nanny - I can't just drop off Lyndy to your lap whenever I need to work", she continued.
It was not like Amy had not thought about a nanny or a babysitter already more than once, but she was feeling guilty for even considering it. She had expected to be a different kind of mom, someone who was able to make it work with a kid on her arm. It seemed like women these days were able to have it all, just like her mom or Lou, but she wasn't sure how. She was already struggling with working from home and raising her daughter within the same ranch mostly because her job was physical and at times dangerous and she couldn't just carry Lyndy around and focus on her while working. Amy was in awe of those women who were able to see their friends, work out and have hobbies. Some single mothers even squeezed in dating.
Maybe if she would still be married, this would be easier.
Or not, if Ty would be working outside the country months on end.
But now, it was time to face the facts; she couldn't just use her grandparents as babysitters forever and she couldn't make this work without feeling guilty about something. Even though it was going to be hard, the situation had to change, for the sake of everyone in this family.
Amy knew she couldn't afford to be just a stay-at-home mom and nor would it be enough for her because working with horses was her passion, but she also didn't want to be too far away from Lyndy and hand her over to Ty, which is why a nanny or a babysitter was the only reasonable option. Whatever money Ty send their way was not enough to keep them going - and besides, Amy didn't want to rely on solely on Ty's income (which these days was not much as his job was more about a calling than benefits).
She had to show Lyndy, that she could make this work, just like Mitch had reminded her last night. Everything else, like her social life, could wait for a little while longer.
"Amy, stop, I really don't mind", Lisa said, not wanting Amy to feel guilty. "I've taken steps back from my own business and hired help, so I get it. I know it's not exactly the same, because my baby is my business, but I know how hard it feels to ask for help, but the truth is, everyone needs it sometimes. Besides, it's not like I'm too busy today; I have to check the Dude Ranch, yes, but Lyndy will just come with me and it will be no problem at all. And meanwhile you can do what you have to do with the horses. It's better if you can focus on your work without having to worry about Lyndy at the same time. You can't work with horses like you'd only have only 5 minutes - trust me - I get it. So... we'll be fine. Won't we, Lyndy?" the woman asked from the little girl and hugged her gently. "Don't worry about us", she added once more.
"Okay... Thanks, Lisa", Amy said, smiling and feeling a little more relieved even though the guilt was still lingering at the back of her head. "But just so you know, I am still going to look into getting help. It'll be hard, but... it'll be for the best. Besides, it's not like I will be far from Lyndy; I just need to those moments of complete concentration with horses, especially if I'm planning to get more clients."
"And we'll support you with that for as long as you need", Lisa assured. She truly understood what it was like being a young woman with dreams of building a bigger business. She had had Dan for help, but Amy was on her own and she had a daughter as well, so all the support she could give, she would be giving it.
"Thanks", Amy said, then hearing someone pulling up. She looked outside the kitchen window and saw Tim's Ford just as it was being parked right by the barn. "Oh, that's my dad. Gotta go. Bye, Lyndy." She came to kiss her daughter's hair.
"Have fun", Lisa said when Amy left the kitchen.
Amy walked toward the truck, but against her expectations, Tim was not alone. Jade strode out and and she could hear her thank Tim for the ride before she headed to the barn. Amy figured the young girl was probably helping out Georgie with the horses while her niece was in New York with Lou, just like they had planned over New Year's, so in a way Amy didn't consider her an unwanted guest because she would actually be helping a lot today by taking the horses out for ride, but the third person coming out of Tim's truck... well, Amy had conflicting feelings about him.
"Hey", she greeted the two men. "What's going on?"
"You wanted help with that horse of yours, didn't you?" Tim said, wondering if Amy was suffering from a sudden memory loss. "So, Caleb and I are here to help", he explained, gesturing toward the other cowboy and then himself.
Amy glanced at Caleb, but then looked back at her dad. "Can we... have a word?" she asked.
"Sure. Caleb, why don't you get the ATV from the garage? I think you can remember where the keys are being kept?" Tim instructed Caleb before stepping aside with Amy.
"On it", Caleb said.
"Why did you bring him?" Amy asked directly. "I asked your help."
Tim frowned.
"I offer you more help, but you don't want it? Here I thought I was giving my daughter the best I can give her", Tim was almost hurt.
"That's not what I meant..." Amy said.
"Amy, I'm a coach. That's also what I do; I coach. So, I was thinking we could try switching it up between you and Caleb so we can not only challenge you but the horse as well", Tim continued, making hand movements to go along with what he was saying. "Based on what you told me over the phone, he's not going to be just one man's horse, he'll have to get used to all kinds of riders. I know I was maybe being a little bit frank with you yesterday, but I didn't bring Caleb here because I wouldn't believe you couldn't train the horse, I just feel like maybe you have to be shown first what you gotta do, because after that, I know you can do it."
Amy looked at her dad. At least one person here had faith in her.
"This isn't your field, in a way, so of course you're not going to get it right out of the bat, especially with a horse who doesn't really have any idea what is expected of him. And while I would never admit this in front of Caleb", the man looked over his shoulder to make sure the younger cowboy wasn't there, "he can be pretty good at this thing; that's why I've kept him around. Well, that and because he comes cheap. - But I also know that you have the potential as well, you just need to unleash it. I will be watching from the ground to see what it is that you are not bringing forth but should. That's how we'll get the best results", Tim explained, ending his speech and looking pretty confident about himself.
"Okay..." Amy felt a little bit better after her dad had explained his reasoning behind it all. Maybe Tim also needed more time before he could get back on the horse, so she was trying to be more understanding with that as well. "But - it's not only that... It's going to be awkward."
"Awkward?" Tim didn't follow. "How come?"
"Because... Caleb is Ty's friend. And... I guess Ty has a claim on him", Amy said, feeling uncomfortable, especially because the last time they had talked with Caleb, things had not exactly ended in good terms. It was clear Caleb was on Ty's side with their divorce as well.
"Oh, geez", Tim sighed, closing his eyes as he sighed. "Honey, I know this divorce with Ty is hard, trust me, I get it, I've been there. But you can't just shy away from everything that has to do with that lousy ex-husband of yours. If you do, you'd have to move away from here, because everything and everyone is somehow connected to Ty since he lived here for years and he made a lot of connections. I don't care if you "claim friends"", he made the air quotes, "or whatever it is that's happening with the friends you used to have together - you are gonna have to make things work if you want to keep on working. Sometimes it means you have to work with someone you wouldn't like to work with. And I know that that has not been a problem with you in the past, so don't make it a problem now. You have to get over it. And besides, before Caleb was Ty's friend, he was your friend. And your boyfriend! So if anyone has a claim on him, it should be you!"
"Please, don't remind me..." Amy said, not wanting to think back about her dating Caleb.
It had been one of those things where she had thought she had known what she wanted, but what she had wanted was Ty and Caleb had been just a distraction, so there had never been any big emotions at play - other than jealousy over Ty. For a while there, Amy had thought a life with a cowboy would be easier than a life with someone who didn't know much about ranch life, but as it had turned out, neither of those relationships had worked only based on those standards. Love needed more. Besides, it was not like Caleb had had any trouble getting over her either, since he had ended up with Ashley soon after their break-up. Or maybe he had even been involved with Ashley during their relationship - she wasn't sure and at this point, she didn't care. It all felt so childish now; maybe this was just as childish.
"Okay, fine, I'll do this", Amy promised then.
"That's the spirit. Why don't you get that horse, and we'll set things up with Caleb at the ring", Tim suggested.
Amy nodded. "Alright. See you there."
As Amy walked into the barn, Jade was saddling Trouble on the aisle and was almost ready to go.
"Hey, Jade", Amy said as she fetched Harley's brushes. "How's it going? You talked to Georgie much?"
"I have", Jade said as she was strapping on the saddle. "Seems like she's having a blast in New York, even though she misses these guys. But I'm sending her a lot of pics and videos, so at least that's something."
"That's good", Amy said, genuinely happy Georgie had such a good friend in Jade. She followed Georgie's Facebook page and they texted occasionally, but other than that, Amy felt a little out of the loop. She had figured if something major happened with her sister and her daughters, she would know about it. "How's your life?"
Jade scoffed. "Quiet. Between me working at Maggie's and now helping out with Georgie's horses, nothing much is happening. Kind of miss having a friend to do things with... it's just not the same alone."
"I miss Georgie too", Amy admitted, walking to Harley's stall. "But it'll be nice to have you here for company. - What's going on with the rodeo then? You're not doing that anymore?"
"My sponsorship fell through, so I wasn't able to go to the US for a circuit after all, so it's going to be quiet winter. I'm looking forward to the spring, though, when things start picking up here again", Jade shared with her. "At least I have Phoenix, Trouble and Checkers to keep me busy."
"I'm sorry to hear about your sponsorship", Amy said, knowing that happened sometimes for different reasons. "Have to say, I'm kind of glad you're helping out with the horses, since things seem to be picking up here and I really can use the help", she tried to let Jade know that what she did was not a minor thing. Maybe that would make her feel a little bit better.
"If only Georgie paid me more for this", Jade said, half-jokingly. "Don't get me wrong, I love taking care of these guys, but... I could use the money, you know. Should I ask her a raise or would that just completely ruin our friendship? - Then again, now that I don't much of a social life, maybe I don't need that much money. - Who am I kidding; if I want to buy my own horse one day, I do need to save some money. My Hummer didn't come cheap either", she hummed a little. "I even hitched a ride from Tim to save money on gas."
The girl's thought process was so fast, Amy almost had trouble keeping up.
"I don't know how much money Georgie is paying you, but I guess you can talk about it, just maybe not go at it like you're asking for a raise or it might put a strain in your friendship", she gave her advice while quickly brushing Harley. "Can I ask you something else, though?"
"Yeah, shoot", Jade said, taking down Trouble's halter and moving his reins over his head as they were getting ready to go.
"Do you have any experience with children?" Amy asked, then leaning on the stall door and looking at Jade to see her reaction. If Jade could use some money and she was looking for a babysitter, maybe this could be something they could make happen to benefit both, at least for a while until she found more permanent solution and Jade would get busy again. That way she didn't have to feel so guilty about asking Grandpa or Lisa for help.
"Why...?" Jade asked. Then she realized. "Wait, are you asking me to babysit?"
"Maybe..." Amy replied, but she needed a little convincing at first. This was her daughter, so she had to make sure Lyndy was going to be in safe hands.
"I love kids", Jade lied. She didn't exactly hate them, but didn't also gravitate toward them. Besides, how hard could babysitting really be, especially with a little angel like Lyndy. "I might not have much experience with them, but I'm a fast learner. And I take care of horses, so I know what it's like to have much responsibility. I'm not afraid of getting dirty either, you know that. And Lyndy kind of knows me, so that's a plus, she wouldn't have to be with a stranger", she listed things why Amy should seriously consider hiring her.
"That's true", Amy admitted. She was surprised just how quickly Jade had gotten excited over the possibility, which seemed like a good sign. She still had her reservations, but maybe those were something they could work on. "Let me think about it. But this is something that I could make work for the both of us."
"Okay, let me know what you've decided", Jade said, smiling. She could already see the dollar signs in her eyes. "I'll see you later."
"Okay. See you", Amy said when Jade walked Trouble out of the barn. It almost seemed like stars were somehow slowly aligning and her problems were clearing up.
