Chapter Fifty "The Lazarus Experiment"

This funny familiar foreignness lingered at the edge of awareness. If oblivion had a feeling, this was it. There were things around him, touching him, Benny knew. But he didn't know anything. There was no knowing, no feeling. This was death after death—that metaphysical question no one ever knew the answer to until it was too late.

Skin on skin, but he couldn't feel it, couldn't reach out and touch her and tell her... anything. Did he still love her? That word didn't make sense in his brain anymore. Neither did things like word, brain, or sense. The very thought of thinking caused metaphorical shudders.

This was nothing. This was the void. Darker than darkness, more hellish than Hell. Even the urge to fight against it was never fully realized. He was trapped in empty passivity. He had no soul, no mind, no will. Surrender was the only option.

~oOo~

The sensation of walking in on an awkward conversation was very familiar to Sam, especially where Dean and Cas were concerned. He found the two of them standing in the hallway outside the kitchen.

"Are you two having another staring contest?" Sam asked. "'Cause nobody ever wins."

"What is he—" Cas started.

Dean waved it off. "You doing okay?"

Sam realized a second too late that Dean was talking to him. "Uh, yeah, I'm fine. Why?"

"You just look a little... off."

"Is anything normal right now?" Sam really didn't want to talk about his weird dream anymore or the assortment of strange feelings he'd been having lately.

"Guess not." Dean shrugged. "I was gonna go check on Kevin, see if he's gotten anywhere with the tablet."

"They found it?" Sam turned to Cas.

"Meg and Lenore retrieved it while we were gone," Cas said. "Kevin has been working on it ever since."

"Finally some good news."

The three of them started walking in the direction of the library. Sam wasn't that hungry anyway. When they entered the library, Kevin was the only one there, and he was looking a bit faded. Sam hadn't seen him since the day he heard about his mom dying, so he wasn't sure what to expect.

"I will tell you when I find something; stop hovering!" Kevin said, almost more to himself than anything.

"You feeling all right there, Kevin?" Dean asked cautiously.

Kevin looked up as if surprised to see them standing there. "Fine," he said shortly. "I know you need answers right now, but I need quiet in order to find them."

"Right." Dean nodded. "Just let us know if you need anything."

"Translators," Kevin said. "The meaning gets lost if I go directly to English. Or probably any modern human language."

"Sam and I can help with that," Cas said.

"Great," Dean said. "I'm gonna go see what Crowley wanted."

Kevin managed to look shocked and homicidal at the same time.

"Probably shouldn't have said that," Dean muttered.

"You're going to kill him, right? Tell me you're going to kill him."

"I can't."

"Why not."

"Ask Sam."

"That's not entirely fair," Cas interjected. "You were both idiots to deal with him."

"Thanks," Sam mumbled.

Kevin sort of flickered a bit before becoming solid again. "You know what, never mind. I can't think about this right now."

Sam sat down across from Kevin and took a look at some of his notes. "So, do you need strictly non-human languages, or does Ancient Greek or Latin work?"

~oOo~

"... No, you shouldn't come here... because there are about twelve people who want to kill you in this bunker... Yeah, same place."

Dean hung up the phone and turned to see Emma standing in the doorway of the war room with her arms crossed over her chest. He had been aware of her presence the whole time, but he was busy dealing with Crowley.

"Wanna go to a strategy meeting with the king of Hell?" Dean asked jokingly.

Emma didn't move from her spot, leaning against the door frame. "I've got some stuff I need to do," she said.

"You okay?" Dean seemed to be asking that a lot this morning.

Emma shrugged and didn't say anything.

"It's just that you've been kind of quiet."

"I'm always quiet."

"Okay." Dean decided to let it go. "Good luck with your stuff."

Emma remained standing there as Dean headed up the stairs to the door. He could still smell her increasingly human-ish scent as he left the building. She smelled nervous. Dean tucked it away in the back of his mind that he would have to talk to her about it later. At the moment, he had a much less frightening prospect ahead of him.

The sun was out as he climbed up the hill behind the bunker. It wasn't very far to the place Dean had met with Crowley last time, but he preferred to keep this away from everyone else. It was his deal that got him into this, and he wasn't going to subject everyone else to the consequences if he could help it.

But as soon as he passed Sam's herb garden, Dean could tell someone was following him. He let out a weary sigh and turned around to see Meg gazing innocently up at him.

"Why are you here?" he asked.

"To make sure you don't do anything stupid," she replied. "Anything else."

"Cas send you?"

"He doesn't know I'm here. I just thought someone with half a brain should be at this meeting."

"That's the last time I save your ass." Dean began walking up the hill again.

"I never asked you to," Meg said as she caught up to him. "And I know you didn't do it for me."

"Does it matter?"

"You have no idea."

Dean had to think about that for a moment. Was Meg actually thanking him for something? No, that couldn't be it.

They reached the crest of the hill, and the awkward conversation came to an end. Crowley hadn't arrived yet, which was no surprise. He seemed to enjoy making people wait.

"What exactly is the point of meeting out here?" Meg asked.

"It's a matter of principle."

"You let me in."

"You hardly count as a demon anymore," Crowley's voice cut in as he appeared in front of them.

"You're late," Dean said.

"I do have other things to do."

"No you don't."

"You think Hell rules itself?"

"There was the time we had you locked in the basement."

"Sorry I missed that," Meg said.

"Well, you were busy being dead," Crowley grumbled.

"So what's this news?" Dean asked. "You do have news?"

"Yes, I have news." Crowley seemed offended that there would be any doubt. "The Alpha's strength is growing. He's been turning more people the way he turned you. I've kept my distance as much as possible, but he's beginning to encroach on my operations."

Dean couldn't help a faint smirk. "Kinda hard to buy someone's soul when it's already spoken for."

"It's not only contracts. We do get some on their own merits, but he's been turning those too."

"So he's taking the worst sort of people and making them... worse?"

"Exactly. If you're ever going to make a move, it should be now."

Dean nodded. "I know. What's your plan once I do?"

Crowley spread his hands. "I promised my support, and that's what you'll have. Just give me more than ten minutes notice. It does take time to assemble the troops."

"If you want to help now, you can find out where the Alpha is holed up. I think he's got a few places, but he doesn't seem to be worried about me finding him."

"Of course not. He's waiting for you. I'll get someone on it, but I'm not going near the nest."

"Yeah, and call next time. Don't just show up. Cas and Meg were plotting to kill you last time."

Crowley glared at Meg.

"You killed me first," she said.

"I can only hope there will be many casualties in the fight to come." Crowley disappeared without another word.

"Has he gotten grumpier?" Meg asked as they started back down the hill.

"Is that even possible?" Dean replied.

~oOo~

Emma looked down the hallway to make sure no one was coming. It wasn't that she was doing anything wrong, but she just didn't want to talk about it. She walked on the balls of her feet to make no sound as she looked for the right door. With one last look over her shoulder, Emma opened the door and slipped into the room, closing it softly behind her.

Across the room, Lenore sat in a chair beside the bed. She looked exhausted, like she hadn't slept at all. Emma knew the feeling. Benny was actually sleeping soundly, but there was no telling how long that would last.

"Did you get him to drink any more?" Emma asked, walking over to the bedside table to pick up the bloodstained empty glass.

"It took a while," Lenore said weakly. "He doesn't really respond to anything. Except when I sing, but my voice is tired."

Emma leaned over to bed to check on Benny for herself. "I don't know how to sing," she said.

Lenore gave her a curious look. "Not at all?"

Emma shook her head. "No one ever taught me. I used to listen to you at night sometimes when we were in Purgatory, but... well, it doesn't matter."

"I could teach you if you want. It might help him."

Emma sat down on the end of the bed and nodded, forgetting about the glass in her hand for the moment.

Lenore sat up straight and set aside her book. "I suppose Julie Andrews said it best," she began.

For the next half hour, Lenore taught Emma a silly song about notes and how to combine them to make songs. It took a few tries to get her voice on key, but it was a nice feeling when she did. Eventually, Lenore was too hoarse to sing anymore, so she took the empty glass and told Emma to keep practicing for a little while. Once Lenore had left the room, Emma moved over to the chair, closer to where Benny was lying.

"I know we're not exactly friends," she whispered, glancing at the door to make sure no one was listening. "But you're not such a bad guy, and I know you're still in there somewhere. You probably can't hear me, but I just wanted you to know that everything's gonna be all right. And if you could wake up soon, that'd be nice because there's something I want to ask you about... I guess that's all."

Emma leaned back in the chair and started humming the song again, just to keep the melody in her head.

~oOo~

Back at the bunker, Dean and Meg found the library in chaos. Kevin was still right where Dean left him, but Sam was running back and forth consulting books and making notes and getting this constipated look on his face. Cas was sitting across from Kevin, calmly translating something while sipping coffee.

"They're so cute when they're nerdy," Dean said.

"Unless you interrupt them," Meg cautioned.

Sam stopped suddenly in front of Dean and Meg. "I think we might have something," he said breathlessly. "Just give us a few more minutes."

"That was quick," Dean said, walking back out into the war room.

"Everyone around here seems very motivated to save everyone else," Meg said. "That's about all you can get them to do."

"Is that supposed to be a bad thing?"

Meg shook her head. "No, but what happens when people start dying. Crowley was right; there will be casualties once this fight starts."

"I'm not gonna let that happen," Dean said firmly.

"How are you going to stop it?" Meg almost laughed. "Gonna face the Alpha alone? Yeah, that seems like a good idea."

"When this fight goes down, I know I can't keep all of you out of it, but I also know that I'm going to win. Not because I sacrifice everyone I care about, but because I don't. This isn't just some vampire grudge match. There's a reason I'm doing this, and I've never forgotten that."

"You can't protect everyone." Meg's voice was quiet and softer than usual.

"I think you're underestimating my motivation."

Meg gave Dean a long hard look. "You're planning on dying aren't you? That's not going to save anyone, Dean."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh, no, you can lie to Sam and Cas and everyone else, but you can't lie to me. I see right through you. You always planned on dying in the end."

Dean shook his head. "Honestly, I don't know what's gonna happen, but if I don't make it out, that just gives the rest of you a chance. It's not the end of the world."

Meg looked back into the library. "It is for them."

"Guys!" Sam's excited voice echoed through the bunker. "I think we got it."

Dean avoided looking at Meg as he walked back into the library. He tried to focus on however they were going to save Benny. The rest could wait for tomorrow.

"Well, there's good news and bad news," Kevin said.

"What's the bad news?" Dean asked.

"It might be impossible to get the cure."

"How can there be any good news?"

Kevin sighed. "The tablet does say that there's a way to restore a vampire's sanity after they've been subject to mind control, but the exact wording is 'a cure of his own blood' et cetera."

Dean frowned. "So, Benny has to drink his own blood? How is that impossible?"

"In this case," Cas put in. "The language denotes human blood. We would need Benny's blood from when he was a human. And I don't think any of the angels have the strength for time travel anymore."

"No, wait," Sam said, joining them at the table with an old dusty book. "His own blood could be referring to his DNA. As in, a close relative?"

Dean realized where Sam was going with this. "Elizabeth?" he asked.

Sam nodded. "She's a direct descendant. It could be her blood we need. It's worth a shot."

"Who exactly is Elizabeth?" Cas asked.

"Benny's great granddaughter," Dean said. "But will she want to help?"

Sam shrugged. "We could always ask."

"It'll have to be soon," Kevin said. "He's only got a few days to live after the attack."

"Okay, Sam, you and Cas go to Louisiana. Is there anything else we need for the cure?"

"We should have it all in the storeroom," Sam said. "Kevin can make you a list."

"Good, Kevin—I know we've been asking a lot of you, but can you keep working on that thing? Anything that will give us the upper hand against the Alpha."

Kevin nodded. "That's what I'm here for."

Dean let out a sigh. "Guess it's about time I get everyone battle ready."


This chapter was a lot of fun to write. Well, they all are, but for some reason, I particularly enjoyed this one. Maybe because it's setting up a lot of things for later. The end is in sight. Which is kind of sad and kind of exhilarating at the same time. Also, if you haven't noticed yet, I've changed the rating of this story to T because I thought it might help more people find it, and I was told it probably didn't need to be rated M. I guess we'll see how that goes.