Pick Your Poison

Agitator 4.5

[Friday, November 26, 2010]

When Amy and I went to go check on the newborn yesterday, we had been rather surprised at what was considered 'wrong'. The boy, born just the day before Thanksgiving already seemed to be the physical age of a toddler, and abnormally strong as well incredibly intelligent, already having a very vague understanding of his surroundings. Amy's analysis was that he was born with Surge in his system, and it was actually as much a part of him as the Stim he inherited from his mother. Both of which she said were far superior to fresh Stim or Surge. She did allay any fears for his health or lifespan, stating 'he's born nigh immortal, forget medical worries'. And that there, reminded me of my concerns about Stim and Surge working together.

I have, unknowingly and ignorantly, unintentionally created serums of youth, agelessness, and power. Dear god, if you exist, I have committed immeasurable sins, for now I and any I treat with Stim cannot die of age or illness, only violence and accidents can claim us now. I'm surprisingly disturbed by this. Sure, like any sane person I don't want to die, but it's supposed to be an inevitable part of life, and I've bumbled past death with a raised middle finger while drunk.

Speaking of which, I had a surprise Thanksgiving Feast with the whole crew in Warehouse 6 with the cafeteria full to capacity with celebrating people. Reverb was still there into the afternoon but left with Amy and Victoria. Skidmark said he had something important to pass on to me from Reverb but that could wait. The rest of the day blurred into a mess of feasting, and drinking, what I believe was champagne and hard cider. Not even the responsible adults stopped us, something about Stim and Surge making drinking age requirements pointless?

I have no idea what went on after, but I groaned as I woke up with a weak pulsing headache. How much did I drink? Pantera must be on top of me, I feel her weight pressing into me. "Ugh...Pan...Pan, get off…." I tried to move my legs, but I was thoroughly pinned. I opened my eyes to see Pan's beautiful if feline face snuggled into the crook of my neck, but I gasped and felt my heart race and my head ache even more at seeing two others in the bed with us.

I could barely see them past Pantera's huge butt, but I could see Taylor and Bitch using us as pillows, and all of us were naked, reeking of champagne and fruity cider. Dear gosh, please no. Tell me I didn't lose my virginity blackout sloshed and in a foursome to boot! I'd have rather been lucid enough to remember it!

Bitch stirred and grunted as she pushed herself off of Pantera and I's legs, yawning expansively with her elongated canine jaw reminding me how many teeth she had. The fur on her face was sticky and matted, making me feel warm at thinking what she did that could cause that. After stretching out her back, Bitch blinked blearily and looked down at me indifferently. "Next time, fuck us, don't play with us." Bitch demanded as she sat up and scratched at her hefty chest.

"Oh thank god, so none of us actually had sex?" I asked for clarification, and Bitch grunted in irritation with a nod as she picked at her sticky fur.

"We just used our mouths. Taylor's loud." Bitch commented with her ears bending back a moment, making me feel even warmer, and hiss as I felt my groin decide I was aroused enough to appear, right between Pantera's thighs too. Damn it, not now. My head hurts too much. "And that's why I said we should just fuck. But no. Taylor said it wasn't right since you were drunk."

"Mrrr...this is a thing I could enjoy waking up to." Pantera purred as she squeezed her thick, muscular thighs around my member, and I gasped as i pushed at her with one hand, holding my skull in pain with the other. Fuck that hurt…. "But right now, you need some Addictol, or something else to help your head, like aspirin." Pantera considerately let my phallus go, and I sighed as I closed my eyes and rubbed the temples of my saurian skull.

"Ladies, can we please get cleaned up and ready for the day?" Taylor's voice declared as she seemed to simply snap awake and ran her fingers through her tangled mop of hair. "Andrew needs some peace and quiet too." Thank you Taylor for being the voice of reason in this den of debauchery, even if you didn't manage to stop events transpiring completely last night.

"Dibs on the shampoo first!" Pantera suddenly declared as she jumped off the bed in a display of impressive acrobatics, running out of the room with Taylor and Bitch quickly giving chase.

"No fair! I use less than both of you!" Taylor complained from down the hall as I groaned.

"I'm sticky from licking you both out, I get clean first." I rubbed my temples again at Bitch's own argument, and sighed as I got up and closed the door, before stumbling back to bed and flopping face-down into the musky sheets. Today can wait...zzzz….

[Pick Your Poison]

I woke up about an hour later, stumbling into the kitchen after a quick shower to find my girlfriends...holy shit I can legitimately say that without being a douchebag…. Anyway, to find my girlfriends thankfully dressed...in my clothes, and eating leftovers from last night for breakfast. "Isn't turkey a bad idea in the morning?" I asked as I scratched my freshly washed chest and moved to serve myself a plate from the huge lineup on the counter.

"It's tasty." Bitch shrugged as she gnawed on a leg bone. "Besides Rebel, I don't have any dogs to work with right now." Bitch groused, and I felt another pang of anger at Coil for hurting her.

"Well she could use it. Rebel's a, well, a rebel. She doesn't follow any directions." Taylor said as I moved to the fridge and got a soda ironically labeled '1337's totally not a rip-off cola' to take with the aspirin I brought from the bathroom. I nearly choked. RC cola?! This IS a rip-off! Who the hell drinks RC anyway? Well, likely Leet apparently, unless this was just a troll.

"I'm gonna call my uncle up and see if we can't spend some more time together. Unless you have something new to test Andrew?" Pantera asked after she finished scarfing down her hot turkey sandwich, licking the gravy off her whiskers.

"I'm so busy just trying to recover that I haven't really been thinking of making anything new. I'm thinking of putting on a Guise Belt and going for a stroll down the waterfront, see how the DWU are doing on cleaning up the shore and ship graveyard." I haven't really gotten to relax or enjoy myself lately, have I? Every time I try I either end up in a cape battle, or something else just as violent. "Uh...actually, considering my track record of things going to shit when I go walkabout, I think I'll just keep tinkering away. The nurses might be watching the Stim vat to keep the Bleeder fed and keep harvesting Stim, but I've got to get to work on more new things anyway."

"Actually Andrew, I think you taking a break is a good idea. This time, I'm not leaving your side. The worst seems to happen when we're apart." Taylor insisted as she finished ravenously eating her fourth plate of food. Panacea did mention she'd need more energy to recover now I think of it, considering she's up again to dish herself a fifth plate now.

"Sounds good. I'm gonna go work on Rebel then, maybe go looking for more dogs now the Empire's done and their dogs are everywhere." Bitch stated and stood once she licked her plate clean. She came up to me and licked my snout, which got my quills flaring. "Later."

"Later." I agreed, petting her head, getting a pleased coo and wag of her tail in response before she left our apartment. Pantera then did the same, only kissing more passionately and giving me an appreciative squeeze on my jean-clad butt before leaving. I then sat down to eat as I bemusedly watched Taylor digging into her fifth plate. Her stomach wasn't even bloated, where was she putting all of that? "Is there something you need to tell me?"

Taylor paused in bemusement, before blushing as she realized just how much food she'd been eating. "Uh, no. I'm just really, really hungry. I ate so much yesterday too, but I feel like a gaping hole is in my gut." Taylor described before she continued eating more slowly. "Yeah. It goes down my throat, but then I don't feel any different."

"Hm, how's your swarm?" This might have something to do with her powers. She did get a rather unique blend from pinging off of Bitch, Mush, and Stalker all at once. Who knows what could be up with this.

"...Content. You thieving bastards!" Taylor snarled and suddenly her torso split open, and a disgusting deluge of bugs spilled out and filed out across the room and out the cracked open front door. "Missed some…not used to them yet. Why'd Amy not say anything?" Taylor was red up to her ears. I meanwhile, felt green.

"I'm not hungry all of a sudden…."

[Pick Your Poison]

My somewhat ruined appetite aside, I finished a good breakfast with Taylor before I put on a copy of the new prototype Guise Collar that Leet said he was working on. It was apparently just another step towards a Guise Watch, but it was more my style than a belt anyway what with it being put into the spiked collar I was wearing to the concert on wednesday, lead loop removed of course. It felt oddly reassuring to have something comfortably snug around my neck, helping remind me I'm more than human even while I'm pretending to be. Thankfully the collar looks different in my disguise than it does on me.

Out of caution, I kitted up with my costume and the gear I've prepared, and then used the collar to seem like I was just in a casual sweater, jeans, and boots while human. When Taylor saw me putting on the collar, she flushed and I had to ask why. She said it made me look like a 'bad boy' type or something, whatever that means. So long as it's not a dog term, I'm okay with that, save those for Bitch.

Considering the train yard wasn't all too far from the shoreline at the northern end of the city, we figured we'd just spend the day walking and talking from the quick van-hop out of Haven. We just talked, for once, about nothing serious. I avoided talking about Hess to spare Taylor the stress of the truth for now, while she was poking and prodding me about my preferences and interests.

Before I triggered, I baked as a hobby, now my tinkering has taken that over, I guess. I used to read a lot, too, rather than write notes and theories on impossible microbiology...my powers have subsumed that too…. I...guess, I also like theatre, theater, action movies, and rock music. Which I've been completely ignoring in favor of tinkering…. Holy shit, my powers have completely hijacked my whole life outside of school. When was the last time I even had a talk with my mom? When did we last spend any time together?! "Shit...Taylor, I think I need more than a long walk." I decided as we were rounding the fenced-off ship graveyard, which didn't have anybody working for some reason. Oh yeah, Black Friday...why is that still a thing?

"Why do you say that?" Taylor asked as we casually strolled, noting what boats and ships were gone or were in the process of being broken down. The DWU was doing good work. They've already cleaned up all the small boats and were working on the medium-sized yachts and tugboats now from the look of it. That still left a staggering number of medium-to-large fishing boats, not to mention all the freight and cargo ships.

Judging by the progress, the largest ship blocking the mouth of the bay would be last. She was a former navy oil tanker that was decommissioned and sold to the civilian market as the Whitmore. Being the largest type of T1 Tanker in the latter years of the model's production, it blocked two-thirds of the mouth of the bay. The thing was about as long as a football field, and was sunk by angry protesters at the worst possible spot, making the port mouth unable to accommodate more than half of the ships trapped in the bay and dooming the economy. At least according to Taylor, Danny, and anyone with intimate knowledge would tell you.

Oh, right, she's waiting for my explanation. "My powers have taken over my life Taylor. I didn't really realize it, likely at first because, well, my powers had literally taken control of me, to an extent. Now that my new brain has let me express myself again, and I'm talking to you now. I'm boring. I don't do anything. I just, Tinker, and that's it." I sighed as I scratched at my head. I may love my quills, but having hair is nice.

"Pfft, you? Boring? Andrew, you're far from boring. You're a driving force for good in this city, maybe later the country, the world for all we know. If you didn't kick the Merchants in the nuts with opportunity, Brockton Bay would still be a gang-infested cesspit. Now, there is...who, Coil? Sure, he's a dick, tried to have me killed and attacked our families, but besides that, he's barely even a threat to the city. Especially now that all there is left is You, and the Protectorate." Taylor outlined passionately, and I shrugged with a sigh. She wasn't getting it.

"That's not what I mean Taylor. I don't have a life. I don't have a hobby anymore. I don't eat out. I don't even exercise when I'm not with you." Seriously Taylor. I get you haven't had a life since that bitch Emma backstabbed you, but come on, you have to at least understand this.

"Oh...well, I don't either. Can't we not have a life together?" Taylor cringed when she heard her own words, and I had to quirk a disbelieving brow at her. "Okay, yeah, that was bad. Um. Well, what do you suggest?" She clearly had less of an idea than I did, so I hummed as I crossed my arms in thought.

"Well. It's Black Friday, so people are out wasting their money on expensive things. I'm not hurting for cash myself, but I don't exactly want anything that Leet couldn't just shit out of practically nothing. Wait...we don't exactly have anything to do here in the city for two introverted villains-slash-vigilantes. Why not try out gaming?" I suggested, and Taylor scrunched up her nose. "Hear me out. When they were chatting me up about me looking like a fictional race from a fictional game, the way they described it was like a fantasy epic at least as worthwhile as Tolkien." That might be a big stretch, but it sounded promising.

"Huh. Well, if there's something with a good story, I think I could enjoy it. Sure, let's head back." We had just turned around to jog back to Haven, when we noticed the huge pillar of smoke rising from across the city near Downtown, and we both sighed. "Every single time."

"Every damn time. From now on, let's just read books or something if gaming doesn't work out." I opened my phone and speed-dialed Squealer, who picked up almost instantly. "Hey, Squeals. Any idea what's going on downtown?"

"The fucking Teeth." Squealer snarled with such hate and fury I cringed. I've never heard her so genuinely pissed off. Not even when she's screeching Tie-Dye's ears off for pulling some dumb stunt. "Those fucking bastards dare to show their filthy dicks here again! Deal, I didn't call you because this isn't your fight. This is personal for Skids and I. Just relax."

"Squeal, there has to be something I can do." I'm just as strong as any Merchant, and I have my gear. I've put down Lung for fuck's sake, I've gotta be useful in some way.

"Can you fucking handle fighting a hulking monster that interrupts powers when he screams? A bitch with razor-sharp barriers that she can spawn all the fuck she wants? A lemming who can spew an endless torrent of bodies at you? How about a masochist who uses blood as a weapon? Or the fucking Butcher for all that matters?" Squealer hissed, and I felt a sinking in my chest. The fact she doesn't think I can contribute hurts. "Deal, you're a good kid, I don't want you to die to godless fucks like the Teeth, and the easiest way to prevent that is to keep you away." I heard a loud series of crashes through her end of the line, and she cackled happily.

"...Okay. You stay safe Sher." I dejectedly accepted, and hung up. Why are my eyes blurry? "It's the Teeth. They're back in the Bay. Squealer told me to stay away."

"Oh that's not fair. Those assholes are murderers of the highest order, next to the Slaughterhouse 9. She may have told you to stay away Andrew, but I'm not about to let monsters like them hurt my home." Taylor looked around, then every bug within a around a block radius surged towards us, and I watched as Taylor's body exploded into hair-thin tendrils and absorbed every single bug, turning her into a bulging behemoth of buzzing chitin easily 12 feet tall on it's pole-like millipede legs. "Want a ride to victory?" Taylor's 'swarm voice' buzzed.

"No. Not feeling it now. Stay safe Taylor, don't let any heroes catch you." I waved my girlfriend off, and she skittered thunderously towards the smoke at impressive speeds up and over the rooftops, even if she did break a couple windows on the way up, but nobody lived around here anymore. Well, at least not legally. Feeling dejected, I aimlessly meandered through the streets towards the train yard. I was hindered by idly dealing with a few idiot muggers who hadn't joined up with us by breaking wrists and offering membership by pointing them towards a safehouse.

Even if they decided to snitch to the cops, it was a throwaway spot for recruitment anyway. That said, it only took me an hour to get back to the yard, by which time the massive pillar of smoke had spread and the PRT was out in full force, the sky over downtown was filled with aircraft, both seen and very likely unseen. I had to wait after buzzing for a van in, and once inside, was met by silence. Only a skeleton crew was still here. Asking one of the cafeteria ladies got me the answer that Squealer and Skidmark basically got all hands on board as possible.

Obviously, not including me or the more civilian members. Not even pumpkin spice Nutrigel soft-serve took the sting out of that. I thought I was someone reliable, not just some resource to be coddled. Sighing, I finished my food and went to my lab, turning off my collar and cracking my neck. If they felt I was more use in here than out there, then I'd better get to work. Being in costume for tinkering felt good. Like when I first started out, only this time able to appreciate the sensation of fulfillment I lacked as an emotionless zombie. While I was working on making a bacteria culture for an instant non-lethal paralytic I planned to call No-Bones, I noticed a business card on the corner of my most-used section of workspace.

Next to it was a note from Adam, considering it had his unfittingly elegant scrawl, stating that Reverb left the card for me. I picked it up and saw it was a legitimate personalized business card with 'REVERB' in stylized letters with a contact number underneath. I flipped it over, and blinked. "What the…." I couldn't make it out clearly, but there was this distortion on the back of the card. It took me a moment to realize that it was my thermal vision that was seeing something, so I focused my eyes and could see it better, but it wasn't any clearer.

I rubbed my thumb over the distortion, and it seemed to become more vivid, so I pressed on the card between my hands to warm it up, see if whatever it was would become readable. Once I released the now slightly rumpled business card, the rectangle of paperboard was much warmer and when I focused on it, a message that was colder than the card was clear. Said message was very simple, and confusing.

"Door Me?" I jumped at hearing a snap/crackle behind me, and whirled around with my unseen hackles raised, and gaped behind my mask at the door-sized hole in the air, that seemed to be leading into another lab. I looked around my own lab, before approaching warily, sniffing instinctively, even though my mask had isolated such senses, and carefully reached out my tail to test the edges of the portal. It was stable, practically solid, and when I poked my tail through the portal, I barely noticed much difference besides the other lab being colder.

Sighing, figuring Reverb has dragged me into something dangerous and resigning myself, I stepped through, and as expected, the portal collapsed. My heart thundered in my chest. I wasn't scared, rather, I was excited. I just did something stupid, but my neglected sense of adventure was calling. Also, my power was calling. Looking at the table that was set up with a standard chemistry arrangement, my head pulsed in pain and intrigue at the tube of...what seemed to be some sort of slimy meat at the center of the worktable.

As I stared, my head began to hurt more, and more, but for some reason I was drawn to it, inspired. I snarled, closed my eyes and cradled my skull, this was worse than the hangover this morning. "It's rare that a Shard of Eden fallen naturally finds its way home." Before I could react, a lithe form pressed into my back and a pistol was pressed up into my throat. Shit! I haven't coated my scales in Balcoat yet! "Welcome to Cauldron Mr. Ruebs."