The maid opens the door for Lorelai and her girls for yet another Friday night dinner at the grandparents.'
"Hi." Lorelai smiles as they walk in.
"May I take your coat?" The maid asks them, kindly. While they are taking their coats off they hear Emily speaking in the background in the living room. "Your mother's in the living room."
"So last chance to run?" Lorelai jokes.
"Excuse me?"
"Just ignore her." Rory says as she leads Lorelai into the living room.
They walk in finding Emily on the phone. "Of course I did. I can't imagine who would take 'jackbooted' as a compliment. I will not apologize! Every time she went to the pantry, I thought she was marching on Poland." Lorelai and her girls start making their own drinks as they continue listening to Emily who has yet to notice they are there. "I see. Because I want things a certain way, I'm unreasonable. This is the most absurd—I want to see this document. Fax it to me immediately."
"Fax it to me immediately." Lorelai mocks quietly.
"She's part of the electronic age." Lauren says.
"Tomorrow morning is completely unacceptable." Emily continues, sternly. "It's unacceptable because I'm paying you $300 an hour." The girls sit down in their usual spots. "So, turn that little near-luxury car around, go back to your office and fax me that libelous paper."
"Ask her if he can pick up some ice cream, too." Lorelai whispers.
"Well, tell your wife to tape your daughter's recital." Emily hangs up. "Unbelievable." She says as she turns around, looking surprised to see her girls sitting there.
"Hi, Mom."
"Hi, Grandma." Rory and Lauren both greet her.
"When did you get here?" Emily asks them.
"Sometimes between the second 'absurd' and the third 'unbelievable.'" Lorelai tells her.
"I apologize." Emily says as she walks to make herself a drink. "That call caught me off guard."
"Is everything all right, Grandma?" Rory asks curiously.
"Everything's fine."
"Are you sure? You look peeved." Lorelai says.
"I'm not peeved." Emily says looking annoyed.
"You look peeved." Lorelai repeats.
"Kindly stop making me say the word 'peeved.'"
"Mom, spill it. What's wrong?"
Emily grabs her drink and goes to sit beside them in the chair. "That was our lawyer calling to inform me that one of our former maids is suing for wrongful termination." Lorelai simply nods. "You might at least act surprised."
"It's not the first time, is it?" Lorelai smiles, not looking the least surprised.
"It most certainly is."
"Really?" Lorelai asks, now sounding surprised. Her mother was constantly firing maids for ridiculous reasons. She thought just a few of them may have sued her mother before.
"Yes, Lorelai, really."
"Well, then I'm surprised."
"I'm beyond surprised. It's outrageous."
"What did Grandpa say?" Lauren asks.
"Your grandpa is still in London helping his mother close down her house. Of course he'd not be here now." Emily sighs.
"I think he planned it that way." Lorelai tells her.
Rory squints with confusion. "Which maid was it?"
"Gerta, the one from Hamburg, Germany." Emily tells her.
There's been so many Lorelai couldn't remember which one that was. "Which one was she?" She asks her girls.
"You remember she was the one you made the Hamburg-hamburger jokes to." Rory reminds her.
Lorelai laughs. "I beat that dead horse."
"She was the clomper." Emily adds.
"The clomper?" Lauren asks.
"She'd be upstairs, and it'd sound like Munich beer hall rally."
"That's why you fired her?" Lorelai asks. "Because she made noise when she walked?"
"Yes."
"Was she a good maid otherwise?"
"What?"
"Besides the clomping was she polite, on time, and put the little fork on the outside?"
"Have you been listening?" Emily asks. "She was not performing her duties as I wished them performed. Everything else is beside the point."
"It's always something, isn't it?"
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"It means, you always seem to find the one thing about a maid that negates all of her good qualities. Isn't it easier to let some things slide?" Lorelai asks.
"I see. So it's my fault?" Emily exclaims.
"I didn't say that."
"No, Lorelai, you did. For years I've been listening to you, your father, and everyone else go on and on about how demanding I am, how I have to have things a certain way. Well, guess what? I pay to have them that way. I pay more than anyone pays their maids. If things aren't how I want, then I'm not getting what I paid for. Why is that so hard to understand?"
"It isn't hard to understand— "
"If you pay for first class and they stick you in coach people expect you to be upset. No one calls you demanding or unreasonable. And yet here is this woman, whom I pay more than she can get elsewhere who severance package could finance a summer cruise down the Rhine dragging me into court, saying that I was unfair. Why? Because having paid for one thing I'm not content with another? Am I unfair? Well then, so be it. Let someone else pay first class and ride in steerage, not me." Emily says, ending her rant.
The maid walks in. "Excuse me, Mrs. Gilmore, dinner's ready."
"Thank you, Brooke, we'll be right there." The maid walks away and the girls start to get up but Emily stops them. "Wait! Wait! Do you hear that?"
"Hear what?" Lorelai asks.
Emily smiles proudly. "Exactly."
Jackson and Sookie are arguing about the vegetables Jackson brought by as Lorelai sits off to the side laughing as she watches them bicker. It was nice to have them back to their old selves when it came to work instead of being a married couple all the time.
"Next time I want to buy some grapefruit, I'm just gonna ask for a kazoo because you can only give me the bizarre opposite!" Sookie yells at her husband.
Michel walks into the kitchen, over to Lorelai who very much entertained. "What is your problem!?" Jackson yells.
"I need you to—"Lorelai hushes him. "What?" Michel sighs, looking over at the couple. "It started, you were supposed to call me."
"Stop talking." Lorelai whispers.
"I understand perfectly, you want to be a dictator!" Jackson yells.
"Come off it!" Sookie exclaims.
"Comdr. St. James says, 'Brussels sprouts! You'll bring me Brussels sprouts!'" Jackson says in an terrible accent.
"I'm trying to plan a menu here, Jackson!"
"Fill me in, please." Michel begs quietly to Lorelai.
"Jackson brought pea tendrils instead of Brussels sprouts." Lorelai explains.
"Well, aren't we Evil Knievel?"
"Coffee?" Lorelai offers.
"Yes, please." He says letting Lorelai pour him a cup.
"Pea tendrils are too delicate to serve with the lamb shank." Sookie explains.
"I don't think they are!" Jackson argues.
"Where are the Brussels sprouts?"
"The stocks weren't good enough!"
"You always do this to me."
"Doesn't it matter that I care about the quality of the produce I sell you?" Jackson asks. "That I'd be willing to risk an enormous argument just to save your dinner?"
Lorelai laughs. "That was dumb."
"Save my dinner?"
"You know what I meant." Jackson tells her.
"Yes." Sookie nods. "My dinner is out, standing on a ledge. Oh, no. What's going to happen?" She asks dramatically.
"Sookie."
"Wait. What's that? It's a bird, it's plane. It's Super Jackson, and his atomic pea tendrils!"
"You want to get another produce guy?"
"Maybe I should." Sookie threatens.
"Well, go ahead!"
"Don't tempt me!"
"That's it, I am leaving." Jackson says, having enough.
"Go, but take the tendrils with you!"
"Fine!" Jackson bends down and kisses Sookie on her cheek. "See you tonight?" He asks more calmly.
Sookie smiles happily. "I love you." She says as Jackson walks out.
"And it always ends with a hug." Lorelai smiles. "Okay, what do you need?" She asks Michel.
"The new insurance policies you ordered." Michel shows her.
"Good. The inspector's coming by to check the place out tomorrow so you'll have to show him around."
"What?" Michel asks.
"You're covering for me, remember?"
"AH, yes." Michel remembers. "Tomorrow you two go back to school."
"It's not school. A one-day course at the learning center." Lorelai explains.
"How to run an inn." Sookie says from behind them.
"Yes, amazing you've been able to fake it so long." Michel says sarcastically.
"This is specific to opening small inns, bed and breakfasts." Lorelai tells him.
"I see. Order half of everything. There, you own me $75."
Lorelai shrugs. "Why are you being such a snob about this. You went to hotel school."
"I attended the Ecole Hoteliere de Geneve." Michel informs her.
"Wow. That has to make a hell of a sweatshirt."
"It was one of the premier hotel schools in the world. You, however, are taking a two-hour course at the Radisson."
"Jackson's taken a lot of courses through the learning center, he loves it." Sookie tells them. "He took beekeeping—"
"Jackson keeps bees?" Lorelai asks, intrigued.
"No, turns out he was allergic. One stung his lip and his whole head blew up to three times its normal size."
"Please tell me you have pictures?" Michel asks, amused.
"He also took courses in how to buy foreclosed real estate and writing diaries."
"How do you not know how to write a diary?" Lorelai asks.
"He's a searcher."
"Yes, he is."
"Plus, I think he was lonely before we got together and he didn't live near a good bar."
"I predict tomorrow will be a waste of time and money and I will be here to laugh at you when you return." Michel tells them as he walks away.
"Thanks for your support." Lorelai smiles. "Forget him. Opening our own inn is a huge step. We need anything that helps is worth trying."
"Exactly, partner." Sookie agrees.
"Now, tell me you've got pictures of Jackson's giant head."
"I'll bring them in tomorrow."
Lauren is walking down the hall to her next class when she is suddenly bumped on the shoulder causing her books to fly out of her hands and onto the floor. She turns around and sees Jessica, the girl that had been bugging her before, laughing with her friends as they watch Lauren.
"Oops." Jessica smirks. "Where's your friends to help with that?" Jessica wonders as she looks around. Lauren rolls her eyes. "Oh, wait. You don't have any.
Lauren throws her books back onto the floor and walks over to Jessica. Though she was short, she had no issues with standing up for herself. "What's your problem?" She asks as she gets into Jessica's face.
Jessica and her friends laugh as they look at Lauren. "Leave Gavin alone. I've already told you he's mine." Jessica tells her.
Lauren rolls her eyes. This again? "That's funny, because I don't see Gavin with you. You must not have that rope tight enough."
Jessica pushes Lauren away making her hit the lockers in back of her. "You better watch yourself, Gilmore."
"Trust me, Whitman, you don't know who you are messing with." Lauren says as she pushes Jessica back.
Jessica's friends get in the middle of them ready to fight until suddenly Gavin runs up getting in the middle of them. "Hey. What's going on?" He asks them.
"Tell your girl posse to leave me the hell alone." Lauren glares before she grabs her books and walks away.
Gavin sighs and looks back at Jessica. She walks over to him and smiles. "See you after class." She says before she walks away.
Rory walks into the classroom where Paris is waiting to start the student council meeting.
"Hey, Paris." She says as she walks over to Paris who is looking through the suggestion box at the votes for the commencement speaker.
"Have you looked over the votes for the commencement speaker?" Paris asks, looking confused.
"Yes."
"Are the ones for Princess Diana's butler jokes or real?"
"I'd say jokes."
"The ones for Dr. Phil?"
"I think real."
"That suggestion box was a bad idea." Paris says. "Watch Choate get Joan Didion while we're being read Eloise at the Plaza."
"Listen, before the others get here, we should decide what we're going to do."
"About what?"
"The prom coup Francie staged last week." Rory tells her.
"You mean, booking Wadsworth Mansion?" Paris asks.
"Using all the money reserved for the telescope." Rory adds.
Paris continues looking through the box. "Why does one pinhead always have to vote for Jerry Garcia?"
"I'm not sure if they check has been sent—"
"I took care of that." Paris interrupts.
"What?"
"Wadsworth Mansion is owned by the Connecticut Daughters of the Mayflower. Most of them negotiate an icy sidewalk, much less a contract. It took me about five minutes on the phone to get them to half the asking price."
"You're kidding."
"Well, there was no way I was letting the class gift be a stupid tree just so Ginger Spice can have a dream prom." Paris scoffs.
"She's a sneak." Rory frowns.
"She's not smart enough to be a sneak. Anyone can call a meeting. It's that loser, Mr. Hunter, that let her do it."
"She kind of forced him into it."
"You can't force a teacher into something. No, it was Hunter." Paris says, confidently. "He's been jealous of me since I got into office. Whenever I announce I have a motion to introduce, he flinches. Actually physically tightens up for a moment. It's creepy."
Everyone starts to gather into the room. "Well, our fearless leaders at work already." Francie says. "I feel so safe."
Rory sighs. "That girl bugs me." She tells Paris.
"Relax, she's harmless." Paris assures her.
Mr. Hunter walks in. "Paris, Rory."
"Paris, Rory." Paris mocks under her breath. "Bed-wetter. Shall we sit?"
"Fine, let's sit." Rory says as they all take their seats.
"I call this meeting of the student council to order." Paris announces. "Is the secretary ready?" She asks Madeline.
"I am." Madeline says.
"Then let's proceed. First, I would like to apologize for missing last week's somewhat impromptu meeting. As most of you know, its scheduling was somewhat unorthodox since the meeting was a supplementary meeting which was a concept invented by me." Paris explains. "So, that fact that anyone would hold a meeting invented by a certain person without that person, seems—well, let's see, what's the word?" Paris thinks. "Mutinous, insulting, underhanded and, in the end, fruitless—" She says mainly looking at Francie since she is the one who called for the meeting. "—since I renegotiated the rental fee for the Wadsworth Mansion so that we can have the prom and give the school a respectable senior gift in the form of a telescope. Any questions, Mr. Christian? I mean, Mr. Hunter."
Mr. Hunter looks confused by Paris's mistake she purposely made. "No."
"Good. So, now that that's out of the way, let's move on to other business." Francie raises her hand. "Francie."
"As you know, Health Week is coming up." Francie informs them. "We have speakers to discuss everything from heart disease and exercise to the dangers of sun damage and fried food. Everyone's booked and ready. The only thing we have left to do is to figure out where to set up the sign-up table for the annual blood drive."
Madeline screams, startling everyone except for Paris and Louise. "Geez! What's the matter?" Rory asks.
"She hates the word 'blood.'" Louise says.
Francie scowls. "Give me a heart attack."
"Keep your hands on your ears." Louise tells Madeline.
"Tell me when it's over." Madeline says, covering her ears.
"As I was saying before the freak-out—" Francie continues. "—we need to figure out where to place the sign-up table."
"I can still hear her." Madeline says loudly.
"Hum to yourself." Louise suggests.
"Continue, please." Paris tells Francie.
"I'm proposing putting it in the cafeteria, for easy access, maximum exposure, and almost 90% of the student body visits it every day. It's the perfect location." Francie says.
"Well?" Paris asks Rory.
"No." Rory says.
"Excuse me?" Francie asks.
"You can't set up in the cafeteria." Rory tells her. "It's a fire hazard."
Paris looks confused. "It is?"
"Yes, it's a fire hazard. You'll have to find another place."
"You're kidding." Francie says.
"I never kid about fire safety."
"Well, Rory, I know the fire codes for the cafeteria. And as long as we don't have more than 300 people, we can start an opium den and the fire department wouldn't care."
"A: I think they would care. And B: I'm not talking about numbers. You set up that table, you get people thinking about blood, someone smells smoke, and the next thing you know, 50 stampeding teenagers are using your body to lever open a door. I won't allow that."
"This is Xanadu level of insane."
"You do realize you're opposing the blood drive." Paris informs Rory.
"No, I'm opposing the blood drive in the cafeteria." Rory corrects her.
"Is it really that big a deal?"
"It's the rules of common decency and I'll be damned if I let France ignore those rules." She says glaring at Francie.
Paris smiles a bit proudly. "Well, okay, motion denied." Francie and Rory stare at one another as Paris continues talking. "The class president will come up with an alternate plan for the location of the sign-up table for the blood drive. Now, Louise, poke John Williams over there and tell her she can cut the score. We're moving on."
Lorelai walks into the house carrying take-out from Al's.
"Dinner!" She calls out.
"Over here." Rory says from the living room where she is looking through c.d.'s and Lauren is working on her homework on the couch.
"We're in luck. It was International Grab Bag Night at Al's."
Lauren throws her books aside hurries over to Lorelai. "Cool! Did you peek?" Lauren asks, knowing that Lorelai had a habit of cheating.
"And ruin the whole point of the mystery dinner? I think not." Lorelai says as she holds out the three bags. "Pick." She tells her girls.
"That one." Rory says, tapping one of the bags.
"And I'll take this one." Lauren says, grabbing the other.
"Okay. Now, we open them at the same time." Lorelai reminds them.
"We know the rules."
"And do not jump the gun."
"There's a lot of pressure associated with International Grab Bag Night." Rory says.
"I'm your mother, I'm responsible to give you structure." Lorelai says as they get ready to open their bags.
"Okay. On three." Lauren counts. "One, two, three."
They open their bags and look inside. "Mm. Moroccan." Rory says.
Lauren rolls her eyes. "You always say Moroccan."
"And sooner or later, I will be right. What's yours?"
Lorelai sniffs inside her bag. "Pan-Asian with a hint of English Colonial, and few South African influences."
They turn to Lauren. "Thai." She frowns.
"Kitchen?" Rory asks as she grabs their bags.
"I'm going to check the machine." Lorelai says while Rory walks to the kitchen and Lauren goes back to her homework.
'It's Bob Merriman, your mother's lawyer.'
Lauren turns around on the couch as Lorelai gives her a confused look. 'I'm calling about this lawsuit she's involved in. We'd like it if you could give a deposition on her behalf.' Lorelai laughs, shaking her head, as she grabs the phone and starts dialing. 'If you could call me tomorrow with some times that are convenient I can set up—'
"Oh, no!" Lorelai yells.
"What?" Rory asks from the kitchen.
"No. No. No."
"Hello?" Emily answers.
"No." Lorelai says again.
"Who is this?"
"I am not giving a deposition."
"Of course you are. Don't be ridiculous." Emily tells her.
"Leave me out of this."
"I see. You're going to let this lead-footed Teutonic chambermaid drag your mother into a public forum and humiliate her? Is that it? Is that what I'm hearing?" Emily asks her daughter.
"Mom." Lorelai whines.
"Her lawyer knows we asked for this deposition. How do you think it's going to look if you refused to testify for your own mother?"
"Like it's none of my business."
"I'm sure the rocket scientists they assemble as a jury will see it that way." Emily says sarcastically.
"Honestly, Mom, I doubt they'll be able to find 12 people in Connecticut whom you haven't fired." Lorelai says.
"I can't believe you won't defend me."
"I'm not gonna lie for you." Lorelai says as she walks into the kitchen.
"I just want you to tell them how I treat my maids."
Lauren runs into the kitchen and starts picking at the food Rory laid out on the table. "I'm not gonna lie for you." Lorelai says again as she grabs two forks for her daughters.
"You can just tell them I treat the help fairly."
"I'm not gonna lie for you."
"Lorelai, there is something called family loyalty: it means when someone is in trouble you help them as I've often helped you over the years." Emily reminds her sternly. "The very least you could do in return is spend half an hour saying something kind about your mother."
Lorelai sighs. "Fine."
"Thank you. Your devotion is touching." Emily hangs up.
Lorelai hangs up, too, and turns to her girls who are still picking at the food. "I have to give a deposition." She tells them.
Rory grimaces. "I don't think this is Moroccan. At least not recently."
"Luke's?" Lauren asks.
"Let's go." Lorelai says as they follow the youngest Gilmore to the front door.
Lorelai and Sookie are at their two-hour course for learning about how to run a small inn, and they are completely bored out of their minds.
"I can't stress enough the value of a good paint job." The speaker says in a very monotone slow voice. "One of the first decision you'll have to make when you open your inn is whether to employ your housekeepers individually or contract out to a housekeeping service. If you use a service, you'll be assured of having a replacement housekeeper if one should call in sick or quit suddenly—"
"But you'll pay $2 more an hour and they'll be loyal to the service, not you." Sookie says for only herself and Lorelai to hear.
"However, you'll probably end up paying a bit more than if you hired them individually." He continues.
Sookie looks over at Lorelai who is writing. "I can't believe you're taking notes. He has said nothing in the last two hours that we didn't already know and he's saying it condescendingly. In addition to being bored, I'm getting hostile and insecure because you're studying and I'm not."
Lorelai picks up a cootie catcher. "Pick a color."
Sookie gasps. "Pink!"
"Cause you're a girl."
"Exactly."
"P-I-N-K. Pick a number."
"Five."
Lorelai opens the fold. "You will marry Shaun Cassidy and cheat with David." She reads.
Sookie smiles. "Good for me."
"My turn."
The speaker clears his throat at them. "Some of us are here to learn."
"Sorry."
"Yeah, sorry." Sookie says.
"We had a cootie catcher." Lorelai tells them.
"We're sorry." Sookie says, showing them the cootie catcher.
"As I was saying, the points we've covered should get you started." The speaker continues. "But remember, it's a long process. So don't get discouraged. I'm sure one day I'll be staying in each and every one of your inns."
"He's not staying in our inn." Lorelai tells Sookie who grimaces at the thought of the condescending man staying at their inn.
Everyone claps and starts getting ready to leave. "Now, don't run off just yet." He says, stopping them. "We've got one final treat. I'd like to introduce you all to John Mattern."
"Hello, everyone. I'm very pleased to be here addressing you today." John Mattern says as he stands in front of the class. "I asked Brian if I could just have a few minutes at the end of today to show you all some opportunities that I think you're going to find exciting. I know that I do. If we could." The lights turn off and the projector comes on bringing up an image of an inn. "Now, this is a lovely property that has just become available right outside of Litchfield."
"It's a sales pitch?" Sookie asks.
"They spent two hours telling us nothing and then try to sell us lame property?" Lorelai asks.
"We already know the place we're buying."
"I know."
"So what do we do?"
"Let's go." They quickly grab their things and hurry out of the room so no one can stop them. "Unbelievable, shocking, working at an inn and learning so little." Lorelai exclaims once they make it out of the room and into the hall.
"We must be dumb." Sookie tells her.
"Who would ever think that inns need doors and floors?" Lorelai asks sarcastically.
"Not me." Sookie mocks. "Doors and floors, we can't afford that."
"We'd better or our guests will fall right into China."
"Can you imagine the phone calls?" Sookie laughs.
Lorelai scoffs. "What was Jackson thinking saying these courses were good?"
"Please. You're asking me. The man took a course in diary-writing."
They walk over to where there are cookies set up. "Thank God, food."
"So, is it worth it if we made up our $75 admission fee in cookies?" Sookie asks.
"Well, considering that in the past hour I uttered the phrase: "My God, I should have listened to Michel" these better be the best cookies in the world."
Sookie takes a bite of one. "And they taste like feet."
"Oh, well, even their cookies suck. Stand by, I'm going in for coffee."
"Sookie?" A guy asks as he and another guy approach them. "Sookie St. James?"
"Uh-huh." Sookie says, not looking up.
"It's Joe, Joe Mastoni from the Deerhill Lodge."
Sookie finally looks up. "Oh, my gosh!" She exclaims. "Joe from the Deerhill Lodge! It's Joe from the Deerhill Lodge." She tells Lorelai. "How are you? Come here!" She says as they hug. "Lorelai, this is Joe. Joe, Lorelai."
Lorelai smiles. "Hi." She says, shaking his hand.
"Nice to meet you." Joe says. "This is Alex, my partner."
"Business partner." Alex corrects him.
"Clarification duly noted." Lorelai says. "Nice to meet you."
"Joe and I worked together one summer in the Berkshires." Sookie explains.
"Oh, man, we had a wild time, didn't we?" Joe asks.
"A wild time, huh?" Lorelai asks. "Do tell."
"We'd all work 14 hours straight, party till dawn, then pile in Joe's van, and wake up in New Hampshire or Maine with just enough time to get back for the next shift." Sookie laughs as she remembers their pastime.
"We had a real interesting group: Sookie, me, Feldman, Mellon, Bung." Joe names.
"Bung?" Lorelai questions.
"He was the grill man." Sookie laughs. "He'd been up there for a couple of years already. But Joe and I were both in prep."
"And I repeat: Bung?" Lorelai says looking over at Alex.
"Don't look at me. I'm still wondering if Mellon's a man or a woman." Alex tells her making Lorelai laugh.
"I promised myself after that summer I would never chop small green things en masse ever again." Joe says to Sookie.
"Or drink leftover wine on an empty stomach." Sookie adds.
"Let me see your hands." Sookie shows him his hands. "Hey, nice blisters."
"Let me see yours."
Alex reaches for a cookie but Lorelai shakes her head telling him not to do it. "I'm careful about using towels with the hot stuff these days." Joe says.
Sookie rolls her eyes. "Sissy."
"Yeah. So what are you doing here?"
"Lorelai and I are opening our own inn, so we came for a class."
"Really? We're here for a class about opening your own coffee place."
"Chain of coffee places." Alex corrects him again.
"Great." Sookie says.
"We'll see, it's new territory for us." Joe says.
"He at least know the food industry. I'm from ironwork. I know what the security gate you pull down is made of." Alex says.
"Don't listen to him." Joe smiles. "Alex is an incredible businessman. We've got a business model planned out. There are a few prime locations we're interested in. The only thing left to do, besides building it, is pick a name."
"Oh, little tip: Don't choose anything cute." Lorelai advises.
"Oh, like 'Jitters.'" Sookie grimaces.
"'Spill the Beans.'"
"'Higher Ground.'"
"Or 'The Mud House.'"
"Actually, I kinda like that." Alex tells her.
"Oh, me too, we call dibs."
"I thought you were opening an inn?"
"Keeping our options open."
"Hey, did you hear about Feldman's restaurant?" Joe asks Sookie.
"The Feldster opened a restaurant?" Sookie asks, not believing it.
"Okay, I know I'm repeating myself, but 'The Feldster?'" Lorelai stresses.
"I can't believe he opened his own place. He spent the whole summer getting stoned."
"He was our baker." Joe says.
"Right. That figures." Lorelai nods.
"Baker, getting baked, I'm there." Alex laughs.
"Congrats. You still can't have 'The Mud House.'"
"Hey, remember the last reception we catered?" Joe asks Sookie. "The parakeets, everyone dressed as knights and ladies."
"Oh, geez!" Sookie laughs hysterically.
"Old friends, huh?" Alex says to Lorelai.
"Yeah, there's nothing like them." Lorelai laughs.
"I never figured out how Bung got into a fight with the bride." Sookie laughs.
"One minute everything was fine then he was beating her with the ice sculpture." Joe laughs.
"Hey, remember the time when you and Fat Sal got locked in the freezer overnight?" Lorelai says to Alex.
Alex looks confused. "Fat Sal?"
"Work with me here."
"Oh, Fat Sal, right." Alex laughs.
"Then Feldman got into a fight with the bride's mother." Sookie continues.
"That's right!" Joe says. "He went after the whole bridal party."
"And remember how me and the Bruiser—"
"Never liked him." Alex interrupts Lorelai.
"We found you guys in the morning frozen together like bacon." Lorelai continues with her made up story.
"Yeah, I still can't eat bacon."
"Remember what Feldman told the cops?" Joe asks Sookie.
"Oh, yeah!" Sookie laughs.
"Then before Bruiser and I would let you out we made you and Fat Sal kiss?" Lorelai laughs.
"I'm not sure I remember that." Alex tells her.
"You know, I actually don't remember what Feldman told the cops." Sookie frowns.
"He tried to pretend he didn't speak English, remember?" Joe asks.
"Oh! That's right, the 'flooginshorts.'"
"Yes, the 'flooginshort.'"
Lorelai groans. "Great, now we have to make up our own language?"
Alex nods. "This is getting exhausting."
"You know his restaurant is right here in Hartford." Joe tells Sookie.
"No, really?" Sookie asks.
"Yeah, we should swing by one night and bust his chops."
"Yeah, we'll keep sending back plate after plate until he gets so angry he comes out."
"Let's make a plan."
"Sure. Call me at the Independence Inn, where we work."
"For now." Lorelai smiles.
"Sounds great." Joe says. "So glad we ran into each other."
"Me too." Sookie says.
Joe shakes Lorelai's hand again. "It was nice meeting you, Lorelai. Good luck."
"Thanks, you, too." Lorelai tells him.
"I'm really glad we got a chance to catch up." Alex tells her.
"If you see Fat Sal, give him a kiss for me."
"I'll do that."
"Okay." Lorelai laughs as they guys walk away.
"Wait. So, you and that guy knew each other, too?" Sookie asks. "What a coincidence."
"Come on, honey." Lorelai shakes her head.
Lauren is at her locker exchanging her books for the next class when Jessica and her posse walk by.
"Oh, look who it is." Jessica smirks. "Lonely Gilmore."
Lauren glares at them. "Clever."
"I thought so." Jessica laughs. "It must suck to be such loser that no one wants to hang around you. I mean, Elizabeth moved across the country to get away from you and Sasha—well, we all know you aren't the type of person Sasha likes to hang around."
Lauren slams her locker shut and turns to Jessica, getting right in her face. "What's your problem with me? We've been knowing each other since kindergarten and now you have a problem with me? Whatever it is, get over it, because you're wasting your breath."
Jessica glares down at Lauren. "No, Gilmore, you're wasting yours. If you know what I mean." Jessica smirks and walks away.
Lauren had never any issues with anyone before her whole life. She was usually well liked, but for some reason Jessica suddenly had it out for her. And usually Lauren never had a problem standing up for herself, but now, she wasn't sure if she wanted to waste her energy, and apparently her breath.
Paris and Rory are in the cafeteria, bringing their lunch trays to their table.
"How many times do I have to tell them?" Paris complains. "You can't put a 2-inch ladle of gravy into a 1-inch potato crater. You need a smaller ladle or a bigger crater otherwise you get this."
"Gravy on your asparagus." Rory states.
"Yes."
"Paris, the cafeteria workers serve hundreds of students a day, a little gravy spillage is natural."
"So, I should just sit quietly and shovel in whatever slop they throw my way, like inmates in the chow line at Leavenworth, doing 20 to life?" Paris asks. "I don't think so."
"I'll save your seat." Rory says as Paris grabs her tray and walks away. Suddenly a paper airplane flies right into Rory's plate. She looks around, obliviously, and picks up the paper plane where it is written on the front to open it. Inside it read 'We need to meet. Write down a time and place.' Rory grabs her pen and writes on it. There's a loud bang from the back and Rory turns around seeing Paris walking back over.
"They took my tray!" She says looking angry. "I can't believe they took my tray." Rory turns back around and the paper plane is gone. "I just told me them I wanted some new asparagus, and they took my tray." Rory looks around the table, completely confused on where the paper plane went and how she didn't notice it being taken away. "Well, I also told them to buy a slightly looser hairnet that wouldn't squish the part of the brain that can judge depth and measurements, and then they took my tray, but still." Paris sighs. "Now what?" She looks over at Rory's untouched food. "Are you gonna eat that?" Rory slides her tray over to Paris still looking completely confused.
Rory is walking through the parking garage of the school, waiting for whoever sent her the paper plane to meet her there. She looks around and sees Francie standing behind her with a lighter flashing.
Rory walks closer looking unhappy to see her. "Good, you're here." Francie says. "We need to talk."
"We have three classes together. We couldn't talk then?" Rory asks her.
"I thought alone would be better. Besides, you picked the place."
"What do you want?"
"I want a truce."
"Excuse me?"
"A truce. You know. No more fighty-fighty?" Rory glares at Francie, not believing her. "Look. This is not the way I wanted things to work out. Honestly. Yes, the hemline thing bugged me and Paris is not my idea of a secret sister, but I never intended for things to go so far. It's my senior year, too. Why would I want to spend time scheming and fighting?" Francie asks. "It's exhausting. I want to stop this war, the vendetta, this Sicilian thing. It must end."
"This seems awfully sudden." Rory says, shaking her head.
"My time is precious. If I'm not going to truly commit to a grudge I'd like to put that energy elsewhere." France explains. "Come on, what do you say? Friends? Sort of."
"Friends." Rory agrees. "Sort of."
"Shake."
Rory shakes Francie's hand and as soon as she does, a loud siren goes off behind her. And when she looks forward, Francie is gone. "Stop doing that."
Lorelai walks to the front desk where Michel is going through the mail.
"Okay, you'll come in early and set up the conference room for the group from Michigan." Lorelai tells him.
"Yes, I will." Michel says.
"Sookie's on top of the menu. Make sure the dining room is open. We need to confirm the rooms they need."
"I have this written on a notepad right next to my self-help book: Why Don't People Think You Know What the Hell You're Doing?" He says sarcastically.
"Sorry. I'm just a little stressed." Lorelai tells him. "This whole deposition thing."
"Relax, it's very easy."
"It is? You've done it?"
"Once. It was nothing." Michel shrugs.
"Why were you deposed?" Lorelai ask curiously.
"My neighbor had this dog, a frisky little scamp that loved to yap to friends all night. It was so cute. Then one day he disappeared. I told the police what I knew. But sadly the adorable little chatterbox was never found. It was tragic." Michel explains.
Lorelai looks at Michel, not believing what she was hearing. "You got rid of a dog?"
"No." Michel smirks.
"How could you get rid of a dog?" Lorelai exclaims.
"I will show you the lawyer's transcript and the results of the lie detector test."
"You're heinous."
"And very well-rested." Michel smiles as he walks away.
"Lorelai." Joe calls out when he walks in. "Hi, remember me?"
"Of course I do." Lorelai smiles. "Nice to see you again."
"It's beautiful place." Joe says, talking about the inn.
"Yeah, well, keeps the rain off."
"Right." He laughs. "So, is Sookie around?"
"Yeah, she is." Lorelai points to the kitchen. "Right through there, in the kitchen."
"Thank you." Joe says kindly walking away.
Michel walks back up. "Here, give me those. I'll file them with the rest." Lorelai starts growling like a dog. "Stop that." Michel grimaces.
Lauren walks into the inn and goes over to her mom. She throws her bag under the counter, and sighs heavily as she sits in Michel's chair. Lorelai watches her curiously. "Bad day?"
Lauren glares up at her mom. "I don't want to talk about it."
Lorelai leans on the counter to get a good look at her daughter. "Remember our rule?" She asks her. Lauren looks at Lorelai with tears threatening to fall out of her bright green eyes, and she reaches over, wrapping her arms around her mom's waist, hugging her tightly. Lorelai was taken back by the gesture, but she wraps her arms around her daughter anyway. "Okay. We'll talk later." She says, soothingly.
That night, Lorelai, Rory, and Lauren are walking through the square and are going over the questions Emily's lawyer may ask Lorelai.
"This is silly. I know how to answer a question." Lorelai says.
"It's your first deposition." Rory reminds her mom. "Grandma's lawyers want you to be prepared."
"Sample questions." Lauren adds.
"Great." Lorelai frowns. "Bad enough I have to give a deposition, now I have to study for it?"
"Shall we begin?" Rory asks.
"Go ahead."
"Please describe how your mother runs her household." Rory reads.
"Okay." Lorelai thinks. "Do you remember the rowing scene in Ben Hur?"
"Mom." Rory scolds.
"Did that reference date me? I should've gone with the Express Yourself video?" She jokes.
"Should we stop?"
"Sorry. Ask another."
Lauren grabs the paper from Rory. "Would you say your mother is an easy woman to get along with?" She reads.
"No. Next."
"You're not taking this seriously." Rory tells her.
"I am taking this seriously."
"You can't say that."
Lauren shrugs, not seeing a problem with her mom's answer. "But she's telling the truth."
"Yes, but she could present the truth a little better." Rory says. "For example, you could have said, 'My mother is a perfectionist.'"
Lorelai nods. "And do you promise to visit Mommy in jail?"
"Yes, I do."
"Okay, then. My mother is a perfectionist." Lorelai repeats.
"Very good." Rory smiles proudly.
They meet up with Luke who just walks out of his diner. "Oh, hey. Where are you going?" Lorelai asks him.
"I'm going to Doose's because we are out of food." Luke tells her.
"How can you be out of food?" Lauren asks, looking confused.
"It starts with, 'Jess, you do the ordering this week.' And ends with me selling Kirk a lettuce sandwich.'" Luke explains.
Rory nods. "We've eaten those."
"I'll pick up stuff to hold us till tomorrow."
"Well, get some burgers." Lorelai tells him.
"And tater tots." Lauren adds.
"And pickles."
"Okay." Luke grabs his pen and pad. "Hold on a sec." He says as he writes this stuff down. "Burgers, tater tots, pickles. You want cheese on the burger?"
"Cheddar."
"And Swiss." Rory adds.
"Dessert?" Luke asks.
Lorelai panics. "We have to decide now?"
"I would seriously advise it."
"Pie." Lauren smiles.
"Cherry." Rory adds.
"And whipped cream and dental floss." Lorelai continues. "And paper towels and People magazine. We're really hungry." They laugh except for Luke who was slightly unamused.
At Chilton, Francie follows Paris into the bathroom.
"Paris, good. I so need to talk to you." Francie says, trying to sound relieved. Paris continues washing her hands, letting Francie say whatever she needed to say to her. "First of all, I really want to commend you on your job as president so far."
"Thank you." Paris says, simply.
"The way you negotiated on some of those convoluted school issues. Mind-blowing. I watch in awe."
"Uh-huh." Paris really didn't care about what Francie had to say to her.
"And that's why this is so hard because I have major respect for you. And the last thing I would want is you getting the wrong impression of my loyalties." Francie says as she follows Paris across the bathroom where Paris is listening intently to what Francie is saying, suddenly catching her interest.
"What are you talking about?"
Francie pulls out a folder from her bag. "These were shoved in my locker this morning. I didn't know what to do. So, I thought to myself, I'll show them to Paris and I'll explain and she'll understand."
"Explain what?" Paris asks as she takes the folder from Francie. "What is this?"
She pulls out pictures of Rory and Francie talking inside of the parking lot. "Rory came to me and said she wanted to talk about some things." Francie lies. "You know, policy, the prom, the senior gift, etc. So, of course, I said, 'why don't we talk about them at the student council meeting with Paris?' And she says she'll do this without Paris. She said, 'She Is too wrapped up in her boyfriend of hers to care about this.' I didn't know what to do." Paris looks away wondering how Rory could do this. "So, I went and then I found these, and I'm just so upset. I mean, I would never intentionally do anything behind your back, Paris. And I promise the next time she tries to get me, I'll say, 'Talk to the hand,' you know?"
"Yes." Paris sighs. "I know what you mean."
"Are you mad? Say you're not mad." Francie begs. "I just couldn't live if I thought you were mad."
"No, I'm not mad." Paris gives Francie back the photos and storms out of the bathroom, clearly mad.
Francie smiles, feeling successful. "Well, thank God for that." She says as she dumps the photos into the trash can.
On the soccer field, Lauren took some time for herself to let her frustrations out by kicking the ball back and forth to the bungee net. She hadn't played in a few weeks and since everything that has been happening and had happened and since being kicked off the soccer team, Lauren was just itching to get back on the field. But sadly, that wouldn't be able to happen until the next year. She really screwed a lot of things up and she was starting to realize that.
She missed her best friend. Well, she wasn't even sure if she could call Elizabeth her best friend anymore. They don't talk very often and when they do, it's usually short and sweet through email. Sasha had been giving her the cold shoulder since Lauren told her she couldn't hang out anymore. She was unsure if Sasha was upset or just really didn't care enough to give Lauren any sort of attention. Gavin had been trying to play nice with Lauren even though all this stuff with Jessica was pretty much about him. So Lauren thinks. She was tired of being the back burner to everyone's end. Elizabeth didn't want to be around anymore. Sasha doesn't care. Gavin's causing drama he doesn't even know he's causing. And Christopher doesn't want her. Why couldn't she keep anyone around? When did life become this hard?
"Alright, class will begin in five minutes." The teacher of the physical education class announces.
Rory is standing with Louise and Madeline as they finish putting on their Fencing gear. "Does your helmet smell?" Madeline asks, grimacing. "I always get one that smells."
Rory curiously smells her own. "You'd think the brain trust behind P.E. could come up with a sport that wouldn't give you helmet hair." Louise tells them.
"Like badminton."
Louise gasps. "Like striptease aerobics"
"What?" Rory laughs.
"It's really big in L.A." Madeline tells her. "You go through the motions, you don't have to strip."
"Do the other people throw money at you?"
"Mock." Louise says as she and Madeline laugh. "But tell me this, have you seen an overweight stripper?"
"The word 'no' seems so inadequate all of a sudden." Paris storms him, still angry about the conversation she had with Francie. "Hey, where have you been?" Rory asks.
"Washing my hands." Paris says, walking passed them.
"Alright, everyone. Take your places." The teacher calls out. "We will warm up with your counter-sixth repose-quartet." Rory walks over to the partner who is coincidentally Paris.
"Isn't is strange to be practicing a sport whose original purpose was to kill people?" Rory asks them as they put their helmets on. "It's like if high schools of the future had artillery teams or high-altitude bombing or something."
"Beginning salute. En garde." The class gets into position. "Right side, advance."
"You okay?" Rory asks Paris as they continue with the positions the teacher is calling out.
"Why do you ask?" Paris asks.
"You just seem weird." Paris roughly hits Rory's sword with her own. "Easy there, Paris!"
"We're fencing, not playing patty cake." Paris tells her. "You know, it's interesting how you think you know someone. You trust a person, you rely on a person." Paris says as they continue moving into their different positions, hitting each others swords. "Then you realize you've been had. Ever experience that?"
"Paris." Rory scolds. She was not enjoying how rough Paris was being.
"I hate being had."
"Why are you telling me this? You're not supposed to be parrying that hard."
"Gee. I'm sorry. Maybe I should turn around so you can stick it in my back!"
"What are you talking about?"
"I saw the pictures."
"What pictures?" Rory asks in confusion.
"You know what pictures."
"Obviously I don't know."
"The pictures of you and Francie."
"Me and Francie?" Rory exclaims.
"In the parking garage, talking about me!" Paris yells.
"Paris—"
"Don't make that face!"
"What face? I'm wearing a mask."
"The 'I'm Rory, don't you want to pet me?' face. I know you two have been meeting behind my back."
"We haven't, we met once." Rory says, defending herself.
"You admit it!"
"Yes, but it wasn't what you think!"
"Brutus!" Paris says and continues parrying as hard as she possibly could, taking her anger out with the sword. The class all stop what they are doing to watch them.
Rory finally grabs Paris, stopping her, and they both take off their helmets. "Paris, you have to listen to me. Francie wanted to meet to call a truce. She took those pictures of us. She's setting me up, manipulating you."
"Of course she is!" Paris exclaims. "You think I don't know when someone's trying to manipulate me? But it doesn't change the fact that you met with her behind my back." Paris pushes Rory away, and goes after her once again.
"I was trying to help you!" Rory yells.
"You were? You mean, in-between betraying me and selling me out you were trying to help me?" Paris asks. "You are quite a Renaissance woman, aren't you?"
"Stop it!"
"Make me!" Paris hits Rory's sword out of her hands and starts chasing Rory around the room. "Come back here, Gilmore! Come back and fight like a man!" Rory falls to the floor, throwing her helmet off. Paris throws hers off as well and points her sword at Rory. "And the worst part it, you told her about Jamie." Paris says, on the verge of crying. "I can't believe I ever considered you my best friend!" Paris walks out leaving Rory laying there completely confused and humiliated for hurting Paris.
Lauren is sitting on her bed, surrounding herself with all things Chilton. She had just finished getting ready for their Friday night dinner, and decided to take some time to do some reading on Rory's school.
"Lauren?" Lorelai calls out as she walks into Lauren's room. She looks confused when she finds her daughter sitting on her bed just staring at Chilton pamphlets. "Uh, hon, what's going on?"
Lauren lets out a deep breath. "Just thinking." She tells her mom.
Lorelai smiles softly as she sits on the edge of Lauren's bed. "About Chilton?" Lorelai asks, looking slightly amused. "Honey, why are you thinking about Chilton?"
Lauren shrugs. "It's a good school, right?"
"It's a great school.
"Do you think I am smart enough to go to Chilton?" Lauren asks, looking unsure.
"You're more than smart enough. Sweets, where is this coming from?" Lorelai asks, looking concerned.
"I think I might want to go next year."
Lorelai exhales, taking in what Lauren just said. She never expected that her Lauren, her daughter who was so much like her it was scary, would ever want to go to Chilton. Especially since a few months ago Lauren was adamant about not ever going Chilton. She really did change. And Lorelai would be lying if she said she wasn't scared to death. "Okay." Lorelai breathes out.
Lauren raises her eyebrows unsure of what her mom means. "Okay, what?"
"Well, Lauren, first: I want you to continue your research. You still have a few more months at Stars Hollow Middle School, so you have plenty of time to think about it. Second: I want you to talk to your sister. I want her to tell you all about Chilton and how hard she's had to work since starting there."
"I can work just as hard." Lauren tells her.
"Oh, I know. And whether you want to see it or believe it, you're me. And that's why lastly: I need you to really think very long and hard about this decision. This will change everything."
Lauren nods. "I know that."
Lorelai exhales. "Okay. We're going to be late to dinner if we don't head out now. We'll talk more about this later, okay?" Lauren nods. "Okay. Let's go." Lauren stands up and walks passed her mom and out of her room, leaving Lorelai looking back at the Chilton pamphlets and wondering what was really going on.
Rory had just finished telling Lorelai about what happened to her at school as they get out of the car at the grandparents.
"I still can't believe I got sucked in like that." Rory says.
"Ugh. That Francie's pure evil." Lorelai says as they walk up to the front door. "She'll probably wind up President."
"Paris is so upset. She totally thinks I betrayed her."
"She'll calm down." Lorelai assures her daughter.
"She'll never calm down."
"She will calm down." Lorelai says as Lauren pressing the doorbell.
"I can't believe I was her best friend. I feel awful."
"Look, I tell you what, if you wanna make things right, go back to school tomorrow and let her stab you."
"Great idea." Rory says sarcastically.
"I'm nothing if not full of suggestion." Lorelai smiles.
"Or full of something." Emily opens the door. "Hey, Grandma."
"Hi, Mom." Lorelai says as they walk into the house.
"Come in, it's cold." Emily tells them.
"Do you want me to talk to her, arrange a sit-down?" Lorelai asks Rory.
"No, thanks." Rory says.
"Come on." Lorelai whines. "We'll have it in an Italian restaurant, you'll go to the bathroom, come out shooting, and then I'll send you to Italy."
"Well, I do want to go to Italy."
"Two birds with one stone, my friend." Lorelai sits down with her daughters and looks over at her mother who is already sitting in the chair next to them, being rather quiet. "Is everything okay?" Lorelai asks her.
"Of course, why wouldn't it be okay?" Emily asks.
"I don't know. You just seem a little quiet."
"Do I? I guess I do." Emily nods. "I don't really have a lot to say, actually. Oh, I know, why don't I read to you instead?"
They glance at each other curiously as Emily grabs a stack of papers. "What's that?" Lorelai asks.
"This?" Emily questions. "Nothing, just your deposition."
"My—how did you get—"
"Sh. Listen. It's fun. Okay. Question: Would you say your mother is a tolerant woman?" Emily reads.
The girls sigh. They were afraid of what they were about to hear. "Oh, boy." Lorelai says.
"Answer: Well, sure." Emily says, glaring at her daughter.
"What? I said you were."
"You said, 'sure.'"
"Which to most people means yes."
"Yes, to most people it does, but your sure is always sarcastic."
"I do not have a sarcastic sure, do I?" She asks Rory and Lauren.
Rory and Lauren continue looking down at the floor. "Pick spot on carpet." Lauren says.
"—and stare." Rory finishes.
"Question: Why has your mother dismissed maids in the past?" Emily continues.
"Mom." Lorelai says, wanting her to stop.
"Answer: Different reasons."
"Well, that's true, right?"
"Can you expand on that? Answer: Gee, how much time do you have?"
"Okay, see—"
"I mean, if you guys have a lunch or an afternoon squash game or something. You look like the kind who plays squash." Emily continues reading. "Hey, why is it called squash? Is it something to do with a fruit or vegetable, right?" The girls look at their mom who simply shrugs. "A squash is a vegetable, though, if you ask me it's gross no matter what you call it. Well, anyway all I'm saying is you might want to clear you afternoon—"
"I was flustered, he was using lawyer tricks." Lorelai tries to defend herself.
"By asking you to expand?" Rory asks.
"Now you decide to pipe in?"
"Didn't I tell you this was important?" Emily asks.
"Yes, you did."
"So, even though I told you it was important you couldn't put aside your personal antagonism toward me for one day and help me out."
"Mom, this is not fair. I said a lot of nice things about you in there."
"Oh, really?" Emily asks. "Would you say your mother sets impossible goals which people can't help but fail to reach thereby reinforcing her already formed opinion of their deficiencies? Answer: Only for her daughter."
"Okay, not there, but keep flipping."
The maid walks in. "I'm sorry to interrupt, but dinner is ready."
"Dinner, hey, dinner's ready!" Lorelai exclaims, hoping to change the subject completely. "Who's hungry besides me?" Emily gives her daughter a stern look. "I'd keep it warm, we're going to be here awhile." Lorelai tells the maid. "Go ahead." She says for her mother to continue.
"Would you call your mother an extremely critical woman?" Emily reads. "Long pause. Why was there a long pause, Lorelai?"
Lorelai sighs, not knowing what to say. "Because I was deliberately trying to hurt you."
"On a scale from one to ten, rate your mother's compassion for others feelings. Want to guess what she said?" Emily teases the girls.
Lauren frowns. "No, thanks."
"Hang on a second, Lorelai. I just want to skip to the Ben Hur reference."
Rory scoffs at her mom. "Yeah, I did." Lorelai admits pathetically.
At Chilton, it looks like Rory is back to her old lunch routine. She is sitting by herself, reading, as Paris, Louise, and Madeline walk up and sit at the table behind Rory together. She looks around at the blood drive that is going on in the cafeteria when another paper plane flies into her tray and she opens it to find the word Leper written on. Rory sighs and decides to grab her Walkman and slowly drift back into her old world.
Lorelai is in the living room going through her bills and watching some T.V. when Rory walks into the living room.
"I'm going to bed." She tells her.
"At 9:30?" Lorelai questions as she turns the T.V. off.
"Yeah, well, not talking to anyone for a whole day is more tiring than you'd think."
"I hate those girls."
"It was the first lunch that didn't start without a recitation of the calorie content of everything on the table." Rory shrugs. "So, actually It was kind of a relief."
"I hate them anyhow."
"Night."
"Night, babe." Rory walks away just as Lauren comes downstairs. "Are you going to bed at 9:30, too?" Lorelai frowns.
Lauren laughs and sits down next to Lorelai on the couch. "Are you going to hate me if I say yes?"
Lorelai sighs and wraps an arm around her daughter. "You're worrying Mommy." Lorelai frowns as she kisses her daughter's head.
"I'm sorry." Lauren says.
"Lauren, I'm sorry, but I refuse to let you go to sleep without telling me what's been going on because then I won't be able to sleep. And you know I need my sleep to look like this every day." She teases.
Lauren smirks, and nods knowing she needed to tell her mom. "I just don't feel like I belong at Stars Hollow Middle School anymore. And next year these same people are going to be coming with me to Stars Hollow High, if I attend. Nothing will change. I will still feel out of place." Lauren finally admits.
Lorelai looks sadly at her daughter. "Is someone giving you trouble?"
Lauren just looks at her mom wondering how she always knows everything. "Some girls have been making sure I don't feel welcomed anymore." Lauren sighs. "And since I don't have Elizabeth there anymore, and I'm not friends with Sasha anymore, plus I can't even get back on the soccer team this year, which is totally my fault, I'll admit it, but I just keep asking myself what's the point of it all?"
Lorelai shakes her head with disappointment. "You are way too young to be asking yourself that question."
"And it doesn't help that your own dad doesn't even want you." Lauren sighs.
Lorelai scoffs. "He does want you."
Lauren rolls her eyes. "Tell that to the many conversations I overheard, including the phone call he made to you." Lorelai squeezes her daughter, gently, unsure of what she could possibly say to make her see differently. "When it comes to you and Rory and this town, outside of that school, I'm happy, Mom. But I really think I need to change some things."
"And you really believe if you go to Chilton then it'll be better?" Lorelai asks cautiously.
Lauren shrugs. "I won't know until I try."
Lorelai refused to make a decision right then and there so she simply kisses her daughter on her forehead and brings her in for a hug. "I love you."
Lauren closes her eyes and holds her mom tight. "I love you, too, Mom."
Lorelai breathes her daughter in for a few moments longer before pushing her away, playfully. "Alright. Go to sleep." Lauren laughs and runs upstairs just as the phone rings. "Hello?" Lorelai answers.
"Lorelai, it's Alex Lesman. We met at the Learning Center the other day." Alex says on the other end. "My friend accidentally asked your friend out on a date."
Lorelai was not expecting to ever hear from Alex again. "Right, hi."
"How are you?"
"I'm good."
"Fat Sal sends his love." He jokes.
Lorelai smiles, clearly impressed with this guy. "Right back at him."
"Look, I know this is out of the blue. You'll be wondering how I got your number."
"Information?" Lorelai assumes.
"No, that would have been far too logical. I actually called your inn to leave a message but this French guy gave me your home number and said I shouldn't worry about calling late since you stay up late." Alex explains.
"Huh. Well, don't worry, he's getting fired tomorrow. So, what's up?"
"Well, I was wondering something."
"Uh-huh." Lorelai smiles.
"On weekends I like to go to different coffee shops, try the coffee, look at what they're doing."
"See if there's anything you can steal or disguise as your own?"
"Exactly, kind of a low-rent corporate espionage. Anyways, sometimes I'll hit two shops that have a surprisingly similar product and I can't decide which is better."
"Bummer."
"Yes, bummer. I thought it might really help to have someone there to help me make these crucial evaluations."
"An interesting solution to a fascinating problem."
"I was wondering what you were doing this Saturday?"
"You know, it's funny that you should ask me that, I just happen to be one of the world's foremost coffee experts." Lorelai tells him.
"Really?"
"Oh, it's basically just me and this guy named Chuckles from Brazil."
"Sounds like fate. So, what do you say?" Alex asks.
"Sure."
"Great. Just to be on the safe side, you do know this is a date, right?"
Lorelai nods vigorously. "Oh, yeah, I got that."
"Good."
"So, have you guys come up with a name for your place yet?" Lorelai asks.
"Right now the top contender is 'Sludge.'"
"Excuse me?"
"Moving on, my partner likes 'Regular Joe.'"
"Huh."
"Then again, his name is Joe."
"Oh, fancy that."
"So, still won't let go of 'The Mud House?'" He asks.
"Afraid not. What else you got?"
"Well, okay, how about 'Black Liquid Hope Sold Here?'"
"See, now you're making some progress."
Though her night consisted of putting to bed two bummed out girls, Lorelai's night drastically changed with a phone call from a person she never thought she'd speak to again. Some people just won't back down no matter what the situation upholds.
