Author's Note: Thanks to Impslave for Beta'ing for me, and I hope you all enjoy!
Please see the authors note at the bottom for some important info!
Chapter Fifty
Kaidan swivelled his head back and forth between Shepard and the geth strapped into the drive core. By her reaction, she knew it. This must be the one that helped her with the Collectors.
"We'll get you out of there in no time, Legion." Garrus called as Shepard whirled back to the terminal where Tali was standing.
"Get him down." She barked, but Tali stood a little straighter, and wrung her hands together.
"Shepard, wait. The geth are being controlled by the Reaper signal." Tali said softly.
Kaidan swore under his breath. Shepard wasn't going to like what the quarian was about to tell her… Shepard cocked her head at Tali, not used to resistance from her teammates.
"Yeah…this thing. And we need to get Legion out of it. Now." Shepard's voice was hard, her eyes locked onto Tali's mask.
Tali didn't move. "For all we know, Legion is working with them. Maybe it changed sides, or maybe its been hacked."
Kaidan watched as Shepard seemed to swell before his eyes. Her eyes flashed, and Garrus took a small step back, until he was at Kaidan's side.
"Legion helped us fight the Reapers. There is no way it would have agreed to this. Get. Him. Down." Kaidan fought off a flinch at her glacial tone.
Tali hesitated. Shepard snapped her head around and her gaze locked onto Kaidan's. He was moving before the order even left her lips. "Kaidan, do it."
He nudged Tali out of the way and began to hack he console, looking for the override codes that would release the geth from the tubes.
The geth, Legion, looked at Tali. "Creator Zorah, your caution is understandable. Once freed, we will submit to any restraints you deem necessary."
Tali's shoulders slumped slightly. "I'm sorry, Legion…it is good to see you again, but…" She trailed off miserably. Kaidan found the right controls and began disabling them.
"Won't be long now, Shepard. I am in." He said, and she gave him a tight nod.
"Legion, what can you tell me about this thing." She called up to the trapped geth.
"It uses our networking architecture to broad cast the Old Machine's command signal to all geth simultaneously."
"Damn." Garrus muttered, and tightened his grip on his rifle. Kaidan peeked at Tali, who was watching Shepard. The young quarian looked upset, still wringing her hands together.
"So, getting you out of there will shut off the Reaper signal?" Shepard called.
"Yes! Shepard, I have the control to release him." Kaidan called, and started to execute the command.
"Wait!" Legion called, and Kaidan's hands froze. "You cannot simply remove the restraints. We are secured via hardware blocks nearby, that shackle our operating protocols. You must remove the hardware block first. They are on the far side of the room."
"Garrus. Think you can manage that?" Shepard barked, turning to the big Turian, who gave her a look that clearly said 'Are you shitting me?'
"I'll go." Tali said, and jogged over to the terminal. Shepard kept her eyes on Tali until she reached the console, then turned her attention back to Legion. Kaidan just watched and waited for Tali to disable the shackles.
"How did the Reapers even get to you guys? Did they hack you and take control?" Shepard called.
"They did not. The creators attacked." Shepard's eyes flicked to Tali, but otherwise she never moved. "The geth wished to live. The Old Machines extended an offer."
Silence rang through the chamber.
Garrus and Kaidan shared a look. Had Legion just admitted to joining the Reapers, along with the other geth?
Shepard apparently, did not think Legion among them. "So we went to that geth station and rewrote the heretics for what? Nothing?" She scrubbed a hand across her face in frustration. Kaidan wished he could sooth the tension out of her shoulders, but stayed by the console. Now wasn't the time.
"No. You successfully rewrote the heretics. The decision to ally with the Reapers was difficult. Had the creators not attacked, it would not have been necessary."
"Idiots." Shepard muttered, and Kaidan didn't know if she meant the geth…or the quarians.
"So…if the quarians didn't attack, the geth would still be on our side. Smart move, admiralty board." Garrus muttered, and Kaidan jabbed him with an elbow as Shepard came over to the console.
"Nothing excuses an alliance with the Reapers, they could have found another way." Tali snarked through the comms, still hacking away on her terminal.
"Nothing excuses the stupidity of starting a war when the whole fucking galaxy is already in one either, yet you did. Bad decisions are made, and the rest of us are called in to mop up the fucking mess." Shepard snarled.
"Damn it, Shepard! I begged them to negotiate rather than attack. I did!" Tali sounded on the verge of tears, and Kaidan searched Shepard's face.
Her commander mask was firmly in face, her features calm. Her eyes however, were molten pools of fury. She was as close as he had ever seen her to snapping.
"Just get Legion down, and lets get the fuck out of here." Shepard barked.
Tali punched the command, and the hardware blocks came down. She raised her hand and spoke into her omni tool. "Admiral Tali'Zorah to fleet. The reaper signal is about to go offline."
Tali synced all their omni tools into the admiralty boards comm system. "This is Admiral Han'Gerrel, we are in your debt."
Shepard nodded at Kaidan, and he punched the command to release Legion from the wires. The geth dropped nimbly to the floor of the data core, and a small elevator descended, leaving him several floors below the rest of them. Shepard moved to the rail and peered down at him.
The drive core flared bright around them, then blinked out of sight, sending a shockwave over them all.
"Keelah!" Tali muttered, and staggered.
"As a gesture of cooperation, we have disabled the dreadnaught's drive core. All weapons and barriers are offline." The geth called, and Kaidan stared at him in shock. How the hell did it do it? It was free for all of 30 seconds.
Shepard grinned. "Sweet, thanks, buddy!"
Garrus whirled, gun pointing up at the shafts above them. Kaidan could hear a faint scrabbling noise.
"Alert! Geth reinforcements incoming!" Legion called, and they all pulled out their weapons, as geth units dropped from the vents in the ceiling.
"Move!" Shepard roared, and they all scattered and made for cover.
Kaidan and Tali dove behind the same console, shoulder to shoulder in the tight space. "Watch your left Kaidan, that's a prime!" Tali howled, and a rocket roared past his face. Grinding his teeth, he launched a cryoblast, and the huge geth slowed.
Tali's drone zoomed towards it, Tali chanting "Go get him, Chikktika!"
Between the drone and Kaidan's assault rifle, and Tali's mad hacking, they managed to take the massive geth down.
"The geth fleet is destabilized. The signal is offline!" Admiral Xen's voice came through everyone's omni-tools.
"You're welcome!" Shepard spat as she lobbed a grenade into a handful of hostile geth. Kaidan could hear the rhythmic booming of Garrus' sniper rifle, and saw the smoking ruins of several of the synthetics scattered around the drive core.
He and Tali turned their attention to another prime, employing the same tactics that they had used on the last one.
"Civilian fleet, prepare to withdraw! The patrol fleet will cover you once the heavy fleet is in position." Admiral Raan called, and Kaidan saw some of the tension leave Tali. "Whenever you're ready, Admiral Gerrel." Raan continued.
"Good! It's about time we got to see what the quarians can do!" Garrus' bellowed, and Shepard grunted in acknowledgement, and ducked back down as her cover was peppered with bullets.
Kaidan gritted his teeth and launched a massive cryo, freezing three of the geth advancing on Shepard in their tracks.
He and Tali got the second prime down, and Kaidan rolled from their cover and darted across the chamber until he was only thirty feet or so behind Shepard.
"On your six, Shepard." He called, as Tali slithered around him and darted to the next console over, where she could have eyes on Garrus. The foursome hunkered down, and the next ten minutes were spent in a furious firefight.
Kaidan could feel the sweat trickling down his back, and had to resist the urge to pull his helmet off and wipe his face. His eyes stung from sweat, and his temples were beginning to throb.
At last, the geth seemed to be thinning out.
"Admiral Gerrel, what are you doing!" Raan's voice was loud, and panicked.
"Raan, check your screens. The dreadnaught is helpless!" Admiral Gerrel called, and Kaidan saw Shepard freeze.
"It has no barriers, and the main gun is offline. We can remove their flagship if we strike now!" Gerrel crowed triumphantly.
Shepard popped out of cover and began lobbing as many grenades as she could into the remaining geth, as Raan cried, "Damn it! This is our chance to withdraw the civilian fleet safely!"
"He wouldn't…" Tali whispered, then brought up her comm. "What are you talking about, Gerrel? We are still on board!"
Garrus and Shepard had cleared a path to the door, and Kaidan headed for Tali.
"We can't waste this chance. Heavy Fleet, all forward. Take out the dreadnaught!" Gerrel boomed.
"Patrol Fleet, hold position!" Raan screamed, and Gerrel's furious reply was instantaneous.
"You do that and the Heavy Fleet gets wiped out!" Gerrel snarled. "And if we die, a simple retreat won't save you from a geth response."
There was a beat of silence, then. "Damn you, Gerrel." Raan whispered, defeated.
"Damn it! What are they doing!" Tali yelled, furiously trying to get back into the Admirals' comms.
"Focus on getting us the hell out of here…I'll deal with those fuckers later." Shepard's voice was glacial, and Kaidan knew if they got out of here, the Admirals were going to see a side of Shepard hardly anyone saw…and lived to tell about.
Garrus eliminated the last geth on the upper floor with them, and they sprinted for the ladder, down to follow the path Legion had taken.
"Patrol Fleet, flanking support on the Heavy Fleet, give them a firing lane." Raan called, and Kaidan was sure he saw fire shoot from Shepard's eyes.
"All ships. Open fire!" Gerrel called, and there was a dull boom. A second later the ship rocked beneath their feet, and Tali staggered.
A second shot was fired, and the contraption Legion had been strapped into exploded, and went crashing down to the floor below.
Legion darted into sight on the floor below them. "Shepard Commander. The creator fleet is firing upon this vessel." He called.
"Yeah, I'm aware!" Shepard barked.
"Without barriers, the ship will be destroyed. We must evacuate."
Legion headed for a door below them, and Shepard followed him from the ramp above. "Where are the escape pods?" She called.
"Geth transmit intelligences via remote signal. We do not use escape pods." The synthetic called back, and Kaidan's step faltered.
Then how in the hell were they going to get off the dreadnaught?
"Suggestions?" Garrus yelled, as the wall behind them exploded into flames.
Tali was muttering under her breath, and Kaidan knew she must be in shock.
"Geth fighters are docked in the port-side fighter bay. We can pilot a fighter to safety." Legion answered.
They made it to the door, and Shepard was first through. The door to the hanger bay was across a small ramp, in a circular room. It was a massive tube of some kind, and Kaidan couldn't see the bottom. Shepard ran forward, Tali behind her. Shepard was about halfway across when the wall on their right exploded.
Kaidan heard her grunt, and the screech of metal on metal. "Shepard!" He screamed, unable to see her through the smoke.
He saw Tali first, sitting up, frantically patching a tear in her suit while she hacked and coughed. Garrus crouched beside her and began to help.
Kaidan's heart was pounding in his chest. He saw a flash of metal, and darted towards it. It was her assault rifle. There were scratches in the metal ramp and his eyes followed them and saw her. She was on her back, not moving.
"Shepard!" He screamed again, and was at her side in an instant. He scanned her with his omni-tool, unable to take off her helmet in the geth ship.
She was alive, but had hit her head pretty hard. His scan read she most likely had a concussion.
She groaned, and opened her eyes. "Kaidan?"
"Yeah, babe, I've got you." He punched a command into her suit, and he saw her eyes begin to focus as the pain killer hit her bloodstream.
The ship rocked again under their feet, and Kaidan turned to see that Garrus had Tali on her feet once more.
"We need to go." Shepard said, and he pulled her to her feet. She wobbled on her weak leg, then found her stance.
"I'm on point." Kaidan said, and they fell in behind him.
"Shepard to Fleet. Hold fire! I repeat, hold fire!" Shepard screamed into the comms, as massive pieces of debris fell from the ceiling.
"They're not responding!" Tali yelled, desperately trying to get through as well.
"Damnit!" Shepard swore, and Kaidan pushed forward faster.
"Shepard Commander. We have taken control of docking protocols." Legion spoke calmly through the comms.
"We'll be right there!" She yelled, and moved up beside Kaidan, panting as she ran.
They entered the fighter bay, and one of the ships crashed from its dock, taking out a portion of the ramp with it. Kaidan gritted his teeth and sped up. They would have to jump.
He passed Shepard and leapt. His feet slammed into the ramp on the other side, but before he could whoop in triumph, it tilted underneath him, and he went crashing down to the level below.
"Kaidan!" Shepard called, and he groaned and got to his feet. His ribs ached, and he knew he must have cracked something. He looked up and saw her looking down at him. Garrus basically threw Tali across, then did the same with Shepard.
"I'm coming!" He yelled, and headed for the ramp that would take him back up to the rest of the team.
"Quarian bastards!" Garrus snarled and leapt over the breach easily.
Kaidan couldn't help but agree with him.
"Shepard Commander. We can only launch from the upper level." Legion droned, and Kaidan ran harder.
"He'll make it." She called back.
Kaidan pushed on, his legs burning and his ribs shrieking in protest. Legion stepped into the fighter as Kaidan made it to the top level.
Then his world exploded.
A shot tore through the bay, and the artificial gravity was gone. Garrus had gotten his mag boots activated in time, but he, Tali and Shepard had not.
As Kaidan spun, he saw the big Turian reach out and snatch Tali as she drifted past the fighter.
"Kaidan!" He turned his head, and slammed into Shepard. He locked his arms around her, as she skidded off his armour and tried to float away.
Her eyes were wild, and she was breathing hard. He knew this is what it must have been like for her over Alchera, spinning in the wreckage and flames of the Normandy.
Only this time they had air. This time, he wasn't going to let it end that way, for either of them.
"Legion!" He yelled, and the geth located them. They drifted toward the hanger door, and the geth started up the fighter and came towards them. Garrus was leaning out of the top, hands stretched towards them.
"Hang on to me." He told Shepard and she wrapped her arms and legs tightly around him as he let go of her and reached towards Garrus.
It felt like forever before the big turian's hands gripped his forearms and dragged them into the fighter.
"Shepard! I am reading a loss of gravity on the dreadnaught. Are you guys alright in there?" Joker's voice came through their comms.
"We're fine. We are taking a geth fighter out now. Don't shoot us." Shepard said, her voice starting out shaky, but getting stronger towards the end.
Garrus was crammed as far back in the tiny fighter as he could be, Shepard sitting on him, with Kaidan and Tali side by side in front of them, the turian's knees in their backs.
"Shepard Commander, is there adequate room in the cargo area?" Legions asked, and Kaidan smothered a hysterical laugh.
"We're fine. Go!" She barked, exasperated.
"Waggle the wings or something so I know which one is you." Joker called as they shot out of the hanger.
"Kaidan?" Shepard said quietly, and he cocked his head. It was the biggest movement he could make.
"I think you should be prepared to make a report to Hackett." She said, the cold anger seeping back into her voice.
"Okay…why?"
"There is going to be a diplomatic incident." She spat, and Tali cringed.
00oo00oo00oo00
As soon as the fighter docked with the Normandy, Shepard was off of it, and on her way to the war room. She tore her helmet off and threw it across the bay with a snarl.
She could hear Kaidan and Tali behind her, matching her pace.
"What the hell…?" James said, peeking out from behind some crates where he had been working out.
"Not now, Vega." Garrus said, and began to take off his armour, apparently not interested in seeing the show.
"Shepard…let me talk to them, maybe-" Tali began.
"No. You've proven talking means nothing, and they are determined to kill themselves, and us. We are past talking." Shepard growled, and she felt Kaidan's eyes boring into her back.
He was wisely keeping his opinions to himself.
The door to the war room slid silently open, revealing Raan, Xen and Gerrel in the middle of a heated argument.
"Your unilateral strike endangered us all! I should charge you with treason!" Raan howled, jabbing a finger in Gerrel's chest.
He crossed his arms and glowered. "I was within my authority as admiral of the Heavy Fleet."
Raan noticed them enter the room, and threw her arm out towards them. "And what of Shepard and her people! What of Tali'Zorah!"
"They escaped unharmed. Shepard, the mission parameters changed. You are military, you understand that." Gerrel drawled, turning to look at Shepard.
The rage inside of Shepard was intense. It roiled and snarled within her like a beast off its chain. She advanced slowly on Gerrel. Gerrel, who risked his chance to get his own people to safety. Gerrel, who fired on the ship while she and her team were still on it.
Gerrel, who would have killed Kaidan to further his own suicidal ambitions.
"I understand that you ignored the plan, and charged in without thinking." She hissed, and Raan backed away from her.
Gerrel foolishly continued to defend his actions. "The dreadnaught was a perfect target-" His sentence was cut off with a horrible gurgle as Shepard slammed her still gauntleted fist into his stomach. As he doubled over, she locked her other hand around his neck.
"Admiral. You jeopardized your mission. But more importantly, you threatened the safety of my people. My. People." She hissed, dragging him right into her face. "I should kill you now, god knows your people would be better off for it." Her hand tightened, and he began to beat at her arm.
"Shepard…" Tali whispered, horrified. Kaidan stood at her shoulder, but made no move to stop her.
"Get the fuck off my ship. Now." She released him, and stepped back as he collapsed to the floor, clutching at his throat.
Raan stared at Gerrel, but made no move to help him. "Shepard…I understand you're angry-" She began.
"The only reason you're still allowed on the Normandy, Raan, is that the galaxy needs your fleet." Shepard ground out, and the female Admiral flinched. Gerrel made it to his feet and staggered from the room, still clutching his throat.
"You must understand. They geth inflicted heavy casualties before you disabled the reaper signal." Raan said quietly.
"Casualties that would have never happened if you hadn't been so stupid! This whole thing can be laid at the quarians' feet! Three hundred years ago, you attacked a race of sentient beings, because you played with something you didn't understand, and didn't like the results! The only reason the geth even had the Reaper signal is because you were ruled by idiocy again, and decided to attack them. In the middle of a war with the Reapers!" Shepard shouted. Her chest was heaving, and there was a dull roar in her ears.
Everything that had happened to them. Thane. Mordin. Earth. Palaven. It all swirled together. Pain and rage. And right now, she had an outlet for it.
"Shepard Commander. We are prepared to offer assistance." Legion stepped into the room, and Raan whirled.
"What the hell is this!" Raan cried, fumbling for a side arm she wasn't wearing.
Shepard stepped in front of the geth. "This is Legion. It helped me destroy the Collectors. The Reapers were using it to boost their signal and broadcast commands from the dreadnaught. We freed him. And Legion is one of my people. Got it?"
Raan nodded, and behind her, Shepard felt Tali fidget.
Admiral Xen stepped closer to Legion curiously. "This is a fascinating prototype. With some study, I may be able to use it to find a weakness in the geth consensus."
"Did you not hear me, Xen? Legion helped me in the fight against the Collectors." Shepard said quietly. She was working furiously to get a lid on herself. The urge to scream and rage and destroy was huge in her, and the Admirals seemed intent on providing her with targets.
Xen shrugged. "So did your pistol. Should I worry about its feelings as well?"
Like a snake, Shepard's arm struck and she had a hold of Xen's faceplate. "I don't think you'd like to continue this line of thought, Admiral. Legion is my friend, and more importantly our best source of information on the geth. Do not speak of it like a pile of parts again, or you'll go the same way as Gerrel." She spat.
She knew there would be hell to pay with Hackett. He wanted the quarian fleet. It was one of the biggest out there. But there were some lines that couldn't be crossed, and the Admirals were pushing past them at every turn.
She released Xen's face plate, and stepped back. She felt Kaidan move, only slightly, but his hand found its way to her lower back. She couldn't really feel him through her armour, but the silent movement meant he was on her side, and was going to back her up.
"The scientific benefits-" Xen spluttered.
"Are off the table. Last chance Xen, Drop it." Shepard's voice had turned glacial. Xen turned to Raan, who made no movement.
The silence rang through the war room, then Tali took a small step forward. "Legion…How will the geth react without reaper guidance?"
Shepard stared at her. Tali had hesitated and defended the actions of her people at every turn on the dreadnaught. To see her turn to Legion for help gave Shepard a small shred of hope her friend and teammate might actually still be in there.
"This is a false assumption, Creator Zorah. You have cut off long range control, but the Old Machines placed a base on Rannoch for short-term direction."
Raan gasped. "The geth still have reaper upgrades?"
Legion nodded. "Correct. They are currently disorganised, but once the short range-signal is in place, they will recover."
Raan's hands went to her mask. "Keelah… I need to warn the fleet. Xen, coordinate with Gerrel. Move!" She ordered.
There was a part of Shepard that wanted to walk away. To wash her hands of these people, and the mess they had created. But the other parts told her to stay. The parts that knew she needed them to fight for Earth. The parts that knew the geth would have no future if they stayed with the Reapers and annihilated the quarians.
The part of her that had gotten through Mindoir and Elysium knew this was what she needed to do to help her people survive.
She met Kaidan's eyes and saw nothing but support. She stepped forward. "We need to take out the Reaper base. Where is it located?"
"Unknown." Legion said.
"Find it." Shepard ordered.
"Understood. We do know the location of a server from with geth fighter squadrons are controlled. The squadrons are targeting creator liveships. Disabling them will limit casualties. We offer assistance."
"Thank you, Legion." Shepard looked at the data on the war console that Legion uploaded. "Everyone, we take a six-hour break. Get some chow and some sleep, then we head to Rannoch. Dismissed." Tali and the other Admirals headed for their temporary quarters. Shepard leaned against the console, the anger draining away.
Kaidan took off his gloves and set them beside her. He turned her to face him, and she closed her eyes as his warm hands cupped her face. The callouses on his palm were rough on her face, and she pressed into them. His thumbs stroked the sweaty hair off her forehead and he leaned in and kissed her.
They stood in the quiet for a long minute, allowing the tension in their bodies to drain away.
Kaidan's stomach gave a loud rumble, and she smiled, opening her eyes. He grinned at her.
She leaned in and kissed him. "Let's get you something to eat, and then see Chakwas. We both need to be cleared for Rannoch. Then we will try and sleep for a couple hours okay?"
"Yes ma'am." He sighed, and picked up his gauntlets. "But first, let's get this armour off."
He grasped her hand, and led her back to their cabin.
00oo00oo00
The forest was gray, the trees bare, as their skeletal branches twisted and reached towards the sunlight that was absent from the landscape.
I stretched my hand out in front of me, palm upwards, and caught the ash falling from the sky. If it had been snow, it would have been beautiful… But instead, it was smothering, making the air thick, and carpeting the ground in the flakes of the dead.
I took a step forward, silent in the lifeless forest. The smoky shadows of faceless people were scattered throughout the landscape, fading in and out of sight. Whispers danced through the air, almost tickling the edge of my thoughts. They were just sound, and I couldn't understand them.
"Shepard…Excellent timing." I spun, my limbs heavy and sluggish, as I looked for him. His voice had been odd, almost distorted, but clear. His whisper had been louder than the rest.
Mordin.
A young boy, holding a toy shuttle darted through the trees ahead. I moved to follow him, my limbs dragging me down. It was like moving through water, making me slow.
The boy disappeared and I paused, searching among the dead trees for him.
"Shepard…" Another voice called, different from Mordin's, but just as heartbreaking.
"Shepard…" She called again.
Ashley.
I saw him, running through the tree's ahead, softly sobbing, his back turned to me.
I moved forward again, trying, but unable to move quickly. As I neared him, a dull boom rang through the trees, and he stood, fear darkening his face.
The boy from the shuttle turned to me for help. His blond hair still gray from the ash, tears making streaks in the grime on his cheeks.
I reached for him, to pick him up and spirit him to safety. The sky turned red, and he gazed up at me calmly.
I tried to call out, but made no sound. The red light grew brighter and he began to burn.
The whispers grew louder, Ash and Mordin's voice's tangling with those I couldn't understand.
His clothing charred and his blond hair fell away. I fell to my knees on the forest floor, screaming for help, though I never made a sound. His eyes never left mine as his skin blackened, and he crumbled to the ground, becoming the ash on the forest floor.
Shepard shot upright with a strangled gasp, tears pouring down her face. Kaidan jumped, and spun, looking for his gun.
"It's okay…I'm okay." She said, scrubbing a hand down her face. She felt his weight settle onto the bed beside her.
"Nightmare?" He asked quietly and his hand began to smooth circles along her back.
Shepard nodded, her throat tight. The pain in her chest was light a fist around her heart. The dream, dreams, had both been so vivid…and hearing Mordin, and Ash…
Kaidan tugged on her gently, until she was pressed into his side, then he just turned and pulled her into his chest. For a moment she resisted, then she gave up and melted into his arms.
For so long she had been strong, trying her damndest to keep her shit together. But with Kaidan here…she had forgotten what it meant to have someone to lean on…to talk it out with, or rant to.
Or just be there to hold her after a nightmare.
His one hand was still making gentle circles on her back, and he had nuzzled his head into the crook of her neck, his breath warm and reassuring against her skin.
"Thank you." She said softly, squeezing him back.
"Your welcome…but for what?" he asked, and pressed a kiss against her neck.
"For being here. For being you." She sat up, but kept her arms loosely around him. His eyes were warm on hers, and though she could see he wanted to ask what the dream was about, she knew he wouldn't. "I'd forgotten what it meant…to have someone. For someone to be here to see everything, even the things I would usually hide. I know I lost it today with the Admirals, but… somewhere in the back of my mind I knew if I went to far…if I crossed that line you would be there to pull me back."
"Shepard… of course I would. But you wont ever need me to. They deserved everything you said, and Hackett would have done the same. Just with… a little more diplomacy and little less punching." He smiled at her, and she couldn't help but smile back. "I swear, Tali almost fainted when you hit Gerrel."
She blushed a little. "I was pretty mad. He could have killed us. He could have killed you." She squeezed him, and swallowed the bile the thought of losing him brought.
"He didn't. And besides, we've been through worse. And we will get through worse yet. Rannoch is going to be a tough fight." Kaidan brushed the hair off her cheek, and she closed her eyes, loving the tingle of his skin against hers.
Shepard sighed. "Yeah. True enough." She rested her forehead against his, keeping her eyes closed. "I've had the dream before. It was different this time though… I heard Mordin. And Ash. I'm running through a forest… but its dark, and the trees are dead. There are shadows and whispers, but I can't understand them." She paused, and looked down at her hands. She had clenched them into fists. "Then I see the boy. He is running, and I always almost make it to him before… the forest turns red, and he burns before my eyes. Then I wake up."
"Jesus." Kaidan said, his eye's troubled. "The boy… did you know him?"
She shook her head. "He is the one I told you about. The one that went down in the shuttle."
Kaidan closed his eyes and shook his head. "Maybe Chakwas can give you something. Something that will help you sleep without the nightmares."
Shepard smiled sadly at him. "I wish…but you know I can't take anything. If I have to get up, and I'm doped…I can't afford to be grounded."
"We can't afford you to be sleep deprived either, Jane. Next time we are on our way to the Citadel, take something. Just a half dose. I can stay up, put out any fires." She looked at him, at the love in his eyes, and the worry lines crinkling the skin of his forehead.
"Alright." She said softly, and was rewarded with a sweet smile.
"C'mere. We still have an hour before we have to gear up for Rannoch." He lay down again and tugged her with him, until they lay face to face.
"Kaidan. I'm not going to be able to sleep now." She laughed.
He waggled his eye brows at her. "Who said anything about sleeping?"
His mouth covered hers, and the last worries from the dream were swept from her mind. Whatever was coming, she and Kaidan would deal with it. Together.
If they ever made it out of bed.
Author's Note 2:
Hello all my lovely readers! I want to let you guys know that Against the Odds is going to have some sporadic updates going forward. I had hoped to have the story completed by the end of August, as I am going to be backpacking through South East Asia for the next 6 months, but it didn't happen that way. I am still going to do my best to write as I travel, but it will be challenging. This story is 100% going to be completed, I wont be giving it up, never fear ;)
Thank you to everyone reading, and following, and favoriting. I hope you stick with Shepard and Kaidan, and I look forward to hearing from you if you want to drop me a comment.
All the best, Mandy.
