AN: Here we go, another little chapter.
I hope you enjoy! Let me know what you think!
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Carol had been more or less pushing Dr. Tucker and Alice both to finish whatever they were going to ask her or tell her so that she could get out of the little office and down near the gates. She'd promised Daryl that she would be there when he got back, but she'd also promised to come in that morning for an appointment.
She would have been perfectly fine on both counts if Daryl's group had made it back in the three days that they were scheduled to return in…and she'd have even been fine if they'd made it back in the five days that Daryl suggested they might be gone.
But now they'd been gone eight days and the whole community was walking on egg shells about the run. Another group had gone out on a short run and returned in the time that they'd been gone, one man short, reporting increased Walker activity in the area that they'd gone into…apparently a herd was migrating or something of the sort. They'd gone in the opposite direction of Daryl's group…but still it had everyone's hair a little raised.
Carol was trying to remind herself to stay calm. She was trying to tell herself that nothing had happened. There were ten of them out there, more than half of them very able to go on supply runs, and it simply wasn't possible that their whole group had been wiped out and not a single person had lived to return to the community. They were just taking longer than anticipated. That was the only explanation for the delay.
So each day she was more or less camping out near the gates during all of her free time. She was taking books out to read in the shade of nearby trees and she was asking for jobs that would put her closer to the gates so that she'd be one of the first to know as soon as they arrived.
Today was the first day that she hadn't been ready to dart for the gates because she was tucked away in an office succumbing to an examination that was done by one doctor and overseen by another who was "studying" as best she could in this environment.
"No cramps…no spotting, nothing," Dr. Tucker asked for the third time in the tone of voice that said that he now felt like she wasn't being honest with him.
Carol shook her head.
"No…nothing," she said.
"No discomfort…no complaints of any kind?" He asked.
Carol shook her head.
"No! I'm fine. There's nothing to tell you about," she assured him.
He laughed likely and shook his head.
"We just saw Mary Clowers earlier this morning," he said. "And she's about a week or two behind you and she had a laundry list of complaints. You're telling me you've got nothing for me?"
Carol sighed.
She shook her head and shrugged gently.
"I've had a baby before," she said. "I remember what's normal…and I just don't think that I need to complain about the things that I know are just…normal."
He nodded at her.
"That's fair," he responded. "But in general how would you say you are about reporting things that are uncomfortable or unpleasant? Are you a complainer?"
Carol shook her head. There was no reason to lie about it and she wasn't much of a complainer. Ed had taught her not to be. If something was wrong with her, she dealt with it. If she was hurt or bothered by something, she typically just got over it and moved on. It was rare that she ever had a problem, while married to Ed, that was serious enough for her to feel that it merited any kind of medical attention because medical attention would get her more attention from Ed than she ever wanted.
She didn't respond verbally, though, and Dr. Tucker nodded at her somewhat knowingly.
"I want you to promise me that you're going to complain about this, OK? If something isn't right or it doesn't feel…good…or whatever, you're going to let us know, right? The sooner we know things, the better we can handle them and your health and the baby's health are pretty closely tied at this point," he said.
Carol nodded.
"I understand," she said. "I really do…and if there's anything that's not right or…whatever…I'll let you know, but I'm being honest when I say that I feel fine. I feel…good…even. If you want me to complain then I'll tell you that I'm a little tired…that sometimes the food doesn't agree with me…but really I'm fine. My morning sickness is a lot better and I'm feeling more energetic than I was…I'm irritable…sometimes…but I don't have anything to report that I can't say was normal when I was pregnant before."
He nodded.
"Good, that's good," he said. "That's great! If you feel good then that's the best that we can ask for…but you've just got to promise to be honest."
Carol nodded.
"Yeah, I got it," she said. "I promise…but is there anything else? I just need to go…"
He glanced at Alice and she didn't say anything. She was observing more than anything and got involved when he asked, taking his lead.
"You need to take it easy some," he said. "Start now…take this as a vacation. The bigger the baby gets, the more strain it's going to put on you, so put your feet up a little each day. Take advantage of it while you can. And…your pants are tight…you've got some pretty serious marks in your skin that show you're wearing them too tight. It might be time to look into something with a little more give."
Carol nodded.
"OK," she said. "Feet up, take it easy…bigger pants…"
He chuckled.
"And relax some," he said. "You're tightly wound and it's obvious. Your blood pressure's up and none of that's great for you anyway but it's worse right now. Try to relax."
Carol sighed.
"I will…I'm just waiting for this group to get back and I'm a little worked up over that…and over other things…but I will," she responded.
"Then go," he said. "You're free to go…and if you don't have any problems at all then I want to see you back here in about three weeks…but come any time if you think something might be off."
Carol agreed and very nearly ran out of the place, hoping that she hadn't missed, as bad luck or Murphy's Law would have it, the arrival of the group that some were beginning to give up hope on.
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Carol knew as soon as she got out of the office that she hadn't missed anything. Everyone was milling about, always like ants heading in some direction or another, and no one was showing any signs of excitement or of anything out of the mundane happening.
She felt almost let down.
For as much as she wanted to be there when Daryl got back because she didn't want him to think that she hadn't come…she didn't want him to get the wrong idea, she'd almost hoped that being unavailable might somehow "trick" things into working the way that she wanted them to and bringing the group home.
She didn't know how long she could keep trying to convince her mind that he was fine and everything was as it should be when the days kept ticking on and there was no sign at all of return.
The group only had two more days before they were going to send out a search party to look for answers…and that was something they'd always had in place to do if something like this ever happened, but it had never been anything that they'd actually had to do.
Carol hung close to the gates for the rest of the day and she passed back by after dinner and after her shower, but the group wasn't coming in again…so she finally made her way back to her house and curled up on her couch.
She would have, perhaps, liked company to pass the time, but everyone that she might have considered someone to invite over in the evening wasn't likely to come. Sasha was keeping her distance from Carol for the time being and Michonne had her hands full pretending that she wasn't concerned about the run for the benefit of Carl and Judith…but mostly for Carl.
So Carol settled down to try to read a book that she'd read at least ten times before and to pass the night, not sure if she'd actually sleep or not.
But she must have drifted off at some point…
Because when she woke up it was with a violent start, her sleep disrupted by her whole body shifting in a manner that even her subconscious mind must have found disturbing for a night spent alone on the couch. She jerked awake with first the feeling of falling and then the feeling of not being alone before she heard a familiar voice in the now almost pitch black of the living room, her lamp obviously having burned out at some point while she'd slept.
"Shhh…easy…it's OK…ain't nobody but me," Daryl hissed at her.
And Carol realized that the feeling of falling wasn't that of falling at all. It was the feeling of being lifted.
It took her a moment for it to sink in that Daryl was there…and that she had no idea where he'd come from or how long he'd been there.
"Daryl?" She asked, instinctively wrapping her arms around his neck even as he cradled her and carried her through the dark of the house that he was somehow able to navigate while her eyes were still adjusting to the change between sleep and wakefulness.
He chuckled.
"Who the hell else is it supposed ta be?" He asked. "Don't move…I mean that…I'm too damn tired ta catch ya if ya start ta fall…"
"You could have just woken me up," Carol said, shifting her concern about how he'd gotten there to concern about why he was carrying her.
"Whole idea behind this shit was not ta wake ya at all," he grumbled.
And he put her on the bed. Carol shifted around then and climbed under the covers, her eyes adjusting enough to make out Daryl's silhouette as he went around the bed and got in.
"When did you get back?" She asked.
"Just a lil' bit ago," Daryl said. "Was a rough run…I'll tell you about it in the mornin'. When I got in I went ta shower an' I come here. We gonna unload an' all in the mornin'."
Carol felt her stomach churn.
"Did anyone die?" Carol asked.
"Two boys," Daryl responded. "Well…one of 'em died…other one went stark ravin' mad after that an' killed himself…I don't wanna talk about it right now."
"Who?" Carol asked. "The two young boys? The brothers?"
"Mmmm…" Daryl hummed.
He sought her out in the bed and it took a moment for Carol to realize what he was doing and to relax enough to let him pull her body toward him and arrange her how he would.
"I wasn't at the gates," she said. "I meant to be there…when you got back…"
Daryl chuckled.
"It's the middle a' the damn night," Daryl growled in the darkness, his face now close enough to hers that she could feel the dampness of his breath on her face. "Weren't nobody out there but the night watch."
"So you're not mad?" Carol asked, seeking reassurement. It might be the middle of the night, but it had seemed important to Daryl that she be out there when he returned…that she do it as some sort of show of dedication or something.
"I'da been mad if you were out there this time a' night," Daryl said.
He moved enough that she felt his lips brush her cheek and then farther up the side of her face.
"We'll talk in the mornin'…go ta sleep," Daryl declared.
And Carol didn't push it any farther or say anything else at the moment. She simply closed her eyes and tried to do just that for the time being.
