PREVIOUSLY ON KHR SELF-INSERT DRABBLES:

"So why do you want to get a girlfriend so badly?" Shamal leaned backwards on his chair in the nurse's office.

Fran did not even hesitate to answer, "Because then I will be cooler than the rest of the Varia. They are all single."

Shamal stared at Fran for a minute analyzing him. The kid's blank look staring back at him didn't even falter once, "Hmmm, ok kid if you want it that bad, then I'll teach you my own personal skills." Shamal stood up and Fran followed after him. "Let us begin."


Meanwhile, Jana walked up to Gokudera's desk at recess. "How do you think this is going to turn out…." The rest of the gang followed to Gokudera's desk.

Gokudera zipped up his bag. "I highly doubt he'll make any improvements. Or rather, he'll be even worse with them."

"Why's that?" Nebbia tilted her head to the side.

He coughed into his fist, "He's probably going to tell him the first thing to do is to try and grope them."

Yamamoto slowly nodded. "I remember that time he….did that to the Cervello just before Gokudera's ring battle."

Kristina shivered.


"The first thing you have to do…." Shamal paused.

Fran leaned forward in his seat, "Is…..?"

Shamal smirked, "stalk them."

"Hm?"

"I bet you everyone thought the first thing I would teach you is to grope them. That is not the case. Stalking is the first step you must complete before I teach the rest. You must first pick, examine and stalk the fine lady before you think of groping or flirting," Shamal grinned smugly and fold his arms. Fran nodded, understanding. "Now, before we even start the stalking we must observe the nature of the females. Now follow me."

Fran and Shamal both secretly walked to Tsuna's classroom and began to observe, remaining concealed.

"Okay look at the cute one with the pigtails over there by the window, what do you think of her?" he pointed.

"She's really cute…."

"Now look at her carefully. Look at how she wears her clothes, listen to how she speaks, watch how she walks," Shamal leaned over and rested his hand on Fran's shoulder.

"Hey Kotomi," another girl walked over to the girl with the pigtails.

Kotomi turned around, "What is it, Sachiko?"

"Did you see Vino and Nebbia holding hands on the way to school this morning?!"

"Heh?! No way!"

"I know right," Sachiko laughed, "that's so gross! They don't fit!"

Kotomi joined in laughing, "Nebbia's a bitch! Vino's mine!"

"See that?" Shamal stood up straight. "Despite her being a bit annoying sometimes you know how kind she is right? Do you still think she's cute?"

Fran shook his head.

"Next one…." Shamal looked around the classroom. "How about her talking to those other girls." He pointed to a girl with long hair talking pretty loudly to her friends.

Fran nodded, "okay."

"No, observe."

"WHERE THE HELL WERE YOU YESTERDAY!" The girl shouted and punched her friend in the arm.

Her friend pouted and hid behind a chair, "I'm sorry I was busy…"

"WELL MAKE SURE YOU'RE AT PRACTICE TOMORROW!"

Fran immediately cringed, "she's too much like the loud captain."

"What are you doing here?" The two looked up to see Jana and Kristina staring at them through the crack in the door.

"I'm teaching my student here how to pick up girls," Shamal answered and Fran hastily nodded.

"By stalking the girls in our class?" Kristina folded her arms.

Fran poked his tongue at her, "You have no right to stop me from doing this."

"I'm 3rd seat of the Disciplinary Committee."

Shamal and Fran froze. "Oh that's right…"

Jana stepped forward. "How dare you stalk them and judge whether they're worthy of your dirty intentions with one conversation."

"School girls shouldn't be your type, Fran." Shamal placed his hand on Fran's shoulder again. "We'll go into town and get some real ladies!" He began sprinting away through the hallway, dragging Fran along.

"Oi! Get back here!" Kristina and Jana chased after them.

Shamal and Fran both jumped out of a window and ran out of the school gates before Jana and Kristina could catch up. "They'll make it to town before we can find them," Jana commented.

"Let's get back to class before Hibari bites us to death…"


Shamal walked down the street with Fran, "the best place to find cute girls is- ah here we are: the cake shop."

"So how am I supposed to talk to them?"

Shamal rubbed his chin. "Well, there are many different types of things to say to a girl treating herself with cake…"

Fran turned towards his teacher and stared at him.

"You can think out aloud of which cake to buy or comment to yourself which one you think looks yummy, then they might recommend you one. And then you can start a conversation with them about cakes."

"But I don't know anything about cakes…."

Shamal deadpanned. "Just go in," he forcefully turned Fran around and pushed him into the shop.


"Here are your cakes," the woman at the register handed over the small white box to a teenage brunette girl.

"Oof!" Fran fell on his face on the floor of the cake shop.

"Hahi?!"

"Are you okay?!" the employee and the customer rushed over to Fran lying on the ground.

Fran stood up and brushed himself off emotionlessly, "my shishou just pushed me over…"

The brunette pulled Fran over to a table and the two of them sat down, "why don't you sit down. You could have strained something! Here have something to eat," the girl blabbered continuously. "I'm Haru by the way."

"Fran." The boy turned his head to see Shamal giving him thumbs up from the other side of the shop.

At that moment, there was a gasp from the shop door. A boy was staring at Fran and Haru, jealousy clouding his eyes.

"Hahi?" Haru stood up, "Calda-kun!"

"Oi…" Calda stood still at the door with a black aura looming around him, "what's he doing here…."

"It's okay Calda-kun, he fell on his face when he came in so he's sitting down here," Haru explained.

"Yes this very lovely lady here helped me up," Fran nodded.

"Oi oi oi oi oi," Calda continuously shook his head as he walked over to Haru and Fran. "You might want to stay away from this guy, he's dangerous."

"Hahi? He's just a little boy though."

"I've seen what he's done…." A drop of sweat emerged in Calda's hair.

"Are~" Fran rested his elbows on the table and then his face on his palms. "I have fallen for your innocent and pure heart~"

Calda's eyes widened.

"Hahi! Um.. uh Calda-kun, why don't you sit down with us?" Haru nervously looked at the two boys glaring daggers at each other as Calda sat down– just like two dogs wanting the same bone.

Fran took Haru's hand in his and stared into her eyes, "why don't you have something to eat, you seem famished."

Calda grabbed hold of a knife sitting in front of him on the table. Haru looked at the two and down at her hands hesitating. "I um… I'll be right back." The girl bolted up and ran straight into the restroom.

"Where's that sophisticated side coming from?" Calda gripped the knife tighter, "it doesn't suit you."

"I'm looking for a fine lady since the ones at my sister's school were all rude and immature," he snuffed.

Calda's grip tightened even more, "I…spent…weeks festering up the courage to even say something and it took me another week for her to consider me a friend and you stroll along and flirt with her…."

Shamal whistled from the other side of the shop. "Looks like someone's head over heels."

Calda raised his hand and suddenly Fran could feel a murderous aura and tensed. His hand slammed the knife on the table as he abruptly stood up and scratched his head furiously, "THAT IS NOT ROMANTIC AT ALL!"

"Eh?" Shamal and Fran dropped their shoulders and pulled their poker faces.

He placed a hand on his heart and stared into Fran's emotionless eyes, "THAT IS NOT ROMANTIC! FLIRTING! RANDOMLY! IS NOT ROMANTIC! You must start with small things such as flowers or chocolates. Help them out and give them a smile. YOU DO NOT INSTANTLY FLIRT!"

Shamal shook his head, "that is wrong, wrong, wrong. I know much more than you."

"And when has your method ever worked out? Hm," Calda crossed his arms.

"Teach me."

Both Shamal and Calda looked over at Fran, "what?"

"Teach me."

Calda glared at the boy trying to hit on the girl he liked and then it struck him. He began his inner monologue with a subtle spin on his foot. That's it! He pointed his finger at the door randomly. This is my perfect opportunity to get him away from Haru! His eyes brightened with realisation.

Spinning around again he put on a smug and proud face, "Alright! From now on," he hit his heart with the point of his thumb, "I'm your new shishou! Got that kid?"

Fran nodded happily as Haru walked out of the bathroom. "Are you two boys done fighting yet?"

The two boys spun around towards Haru and gave her a cheeky smile and thumb up each, "Yup!" Haru nodded her head approvingly.

Calda smiled brightly at the girl, "I would love to stay and chat but we have to go, sorry. See you later." He waved and pushed Fran out of the shop. Phew now he'll stay away from her.

Fran looked up at his new shishou who was dazing off, "what do we do first?"

"Oh um… lets get some flowers then we'll find a girl that's actually your age."

Meanwhile at Nami Middle

"Where's Calda?" Vino asked.

"Waggin' school," Gokudera yawned and took a bite out of his bread.

"Ugh that idiot what is he doing?" Kristina sighed heavily.

Back in Namimori Shopping District

"I've heard plenty of schools have their days off today," Calda crossed his arms while walking through the shopping centre with Fran. "Keep your eyes peeled kid, you might sight a pretty girl at this time of day."

"Why's that?"

"You're about 10 years old, and 10 is around the age when parents let their kids go to the convenience store by themselves as long as it's not too far away. And right now it's around 1 in the afternoon," he nodded as he checked his phone. "Going after a girl who's with an adult or in a group of friends is as stupid as digging your own grave."

"So what do I do?"

Calda smirked and then extended his arm, gesturing to the entire town, "You must find a girl in need of course. And help her AND NO FLIRTING. You help her because you're such a kind person."

Shamal snorted from two shops away.

"Alright then…" Calda scouted around. "There's a girl over there," he pointed.

Fran walked to Calda's side. "Yeah?"

Calda cleared his throat. "She's holding a piece of paper, looking around the place with worried eyes. Her shoulders are tense and she's scared. Her fingers grip on to the piece of paper tighter. She looks at the piece of paper again worriedly and hastily turns her head in every direction humanely possible."

"Your point?"

"She needs help from a charming young boy like yourself," he leaned down and rested his hand on Fran's shoulder. "Now go." He pushed Fran across the street towards the girl.

"Um." The girl turned around to see a boy around her age with green hair and a bright red apple hat. "You look lost…"

This girl looked down at the paper in her hands that had an address and map on it, then back at the boy. "I… can't find my… friend's house… I'm…" she spoke in broken Japanese.

Fran blankly looked over to Calda, who wasn't even looking at him (instead staring at Haru through a shop window), and turned his head back to the foreign girl. "Would you like some help?"

The girl bowed her head and passed Fran the piece of paper, "y-yes please!"

The two began walking down the street when Fran looked up from the map, "I'm Fran. Where are you from?"

"I-I-I'm from France…"

"That's cool," Fran nodded and suddenly started speaking fluent *French. "*What are you doing here in Japan then?"

The girl widened her eyes in surprise and then explained, "My best friend left France and came to Japan…and my family is here on holiday and I ran away from the hotel and tried to find them but…"

"You're lost…"

The girl nodded. Fran looked upward for street names and then turned the corner towards an apartment complex. He looked down at the paper, "Your friend's house is here." He gestured to the door.

Just before she could ring the doorbell Fran asked, "What's your name?"

"Alix." she turned back around and smiled at Fran. "Thank you," Alix grabbed Fran's hands and kissed both of his cheeks gently as a common, polite gesture to say goodbye.

She turned to the door and rang the doorbell. Another European looking girl their age opened the door, "Hello?" The girl saw Alix and Fran and she immediately ran forward and hugged her friend, "Alix! I've missed you so much! How have you been? Why are you here? Come inside!"

"Leala I finally found you! I'm here on holiday and this boy Fran here helped me find you house," Alix smiled letting go of her friend and gesturing to Fran.

Leala smiled and looked towards Fran, "you can come inside too."

Fran walked inside with a face as red as the apple on his head and sat down inside.

Back at Namimori Middle

"Calda-kun still isn't back…" Kyoko looked out the window. "Where do you think he is?"

Jana shrugged. "At this rate he's gonna get bitten to death."

"That's a worry…" Tsuna said. "Anyhow, we need to find him before Hibari-san notices he's gone."

Back at Leala's house

Calda snuck to the window of Leala's house and eavesdropped on their conversation. It seemed that Fran was talking about himself, then asking them questions about…just random normal things like what kind of food they like.

"I'll go make some tea," Leala stood up and walked towards the kitchen.

"Okay." Alix nodded and then looked at Fran, "Anyway Fran, how come you're so red?"

"Oh.. um… No reason," Fran looked away and still somehow managed to say monotonously. He knew the kissing was just a greeting but it still made him flush red. Calda chuckled from the window, he couldn't speak French but he knew Fran was embarrassed.

Alix giggled at Fran, "ok then."

Leala walked back over to the table, "I'm back."

Meanwhile

Nebbia shouted to everyone, "I FOUND HIM!" The group caught up to Nebbia to see Calda looking through someone's window.

"What is that stalker doing?" Vino frowned.

Calda felt a tap on his back and turned around to see everyone frowning at him. "What the fuck are you do-" Kristina was cut off by Calda covering her mouth with his hand.

"Shhhhh! Look at this."

Jana's eyes widened, "what the hell is Fran doing speaking French to those two girls?!"

Back Inside

"You seem foreign as well, so what are you doing here?" Alix asked Fran as she took a sip of her tea.

Fran knew darn well what would happen if he suddenly said he was trying to pick up girls. He paused before he said, "I'm here to visit my big sister."

"Lies," Jana snorted from outside the window.

Alix nodded. "I see…"

Leala turned around at the clock. "My parents will be home soon….I don't mean to be rude but I think you two need to go soon." She turned to Alix and started writing on two small pieces of paper, "It was great seeing you again! I'm sure your parents will be worried." She handed over the pieces of paper to Alix and Fran. "Here's the phone number for this house, so you can call whenever you like!"

Alix and Fran left the house and Leala closed the door. Words rung inside of Fran's head. Will you please go out with me will you please go out with me will you please go out with me.

"It was nice meeting you, Fran!" Fran looked at Alix smiling at him. "You're a great friend! I hope we can meet again sometime!" Alix beamed and then waved him goodbye, then made her way back towards the hotel district.

Fran fell on his knees and his shoulders drooped down as in one smooth motion the top of his apple hat touched the ground.

"My student has failed…." Calda sighed. "Well, that's the first step to learning."

"Anyways," Kristina ripped his hand away from her mouth and then locked his arms behind his back and pinned him on the ground. "You're coming with me."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Calda screamed as Vino and Kristina held him down on his stomach at the front gate of Namimori Middle.

"Calda-san!?" Tsuna ran out of the school towards him.

"TSUNAAAA HELP MEEEE!"

"Finally….someone to bite to death…" Hibari smirked as he walked out of the shadows, pulling his tonfas out of jacket.

Calda could no longer struggle for he had frozen in fear.


END OF CHAPTER

Few….this was pretty long…hey everybody! Chapters will probably come out at smaller intervals since we're not really THAT busy anymore! :D Woo!

-leextremekid