Craig

The snow fell around the pair like a muffling blanket. They'd already gotten a foot the day before, but it had been the heavy wet kind. This new layer was the glittering kind, with big, puffy flakes that stuck to things rather than melt off.

Nestling his face further into the face guard he'd added to his costume when the snows of winter had first started showing up, Craig let out a slow breath. The snow kept getting in his eyes, making his surroundings difficult to discern. It didn't phase him in the slightest, he just kept trudging along, following the shorter boy ahead of him.

Tweek's hair was starting to look more like ice crystals than his usual blond halo. Craig supposed that was appropriate, seeing as it made him look dangerous instead of fluffy. They both looked more dangerous than they had in the month previous. Around Tweek's shoulders, the Manbearpig pelt he'd started wearing caught more snow, almost like the weather was attempting to help the boy blend into his surroundings. He'd only adopted the extra layer the week before after they'd defeated one of the monsters with the help of Al Gore. In Craig's opinion, the addition fit.

Letting out an involuntary growl, Tweek tossed his head around before leading them both up towards the tavern, which was really just Jimmy's house. Silent as ever, Craig tilted his head up and stared at the sign that had been hung over the boy's door. The Giggling Donkey it read, it's badly painted red letters looking worn after seeing so many storms. Refocusing on Tweek, Craig found the boy looking at him already, his glittering green eyes almost dangerous behind his war paint.

Sensing the unasked question, Craig gave a barely perceptible shrug then nod. Twitching, Tweek faced the door once more and pushed his way inside, allowing Craig to ghost in behind him like a shadow. The warm blast of air made Tweek shiver and growl again. Craig, meanwhile, didn't bother to react to the change as the snow covering his cloak started to melt.

The room was much darker than outside, the curtains having been drawn to give the room a musty atmosphere. It was warm, but the atmosphere was tense, probably because of who they were. Inside of the tavern, the conversations happening nearest the door stopped as the rough looking crowds of mercenaries, the elven and the human alike, took a moment to eye Tweek and Craig. Tweek didn't bother looking at any of them, he just straightened his wild fur cloak and headed towards the bar. Much more cautious of potential hit men, Craig carefully scanned the room, taking note of anything that looked even suspicious.

"Ngh- D-do you think he's here?" Tweek asked Craig softly as they stopped at the bar, his hand clenched around the hilt of his pan-turned-club. Sensing the boy's underlying unease, Craig made a point of reaching out and straightening Tweek's bow, brushing his fingers through the boy's icy blond hair as he did so. Giving the room another once over, Craig shook his head minutely.

"Not in this room," Craig told the blond, who turned back towards the bar and signaled the bartender, who gave them both a wait a moment gesture before going back to serving the boy already sitting there. "But you know Bradley, he's usually around here." Of course, he could be out on a job, but if he wasn't then this was the best place to find him.

Tweek let out a growl of irritation before turning back to the bartender, who was standing before them. "What can I do for you two… gentlemen," the boy said slowly, cleaning a glass as he spoke. Craig didn't blame him for his shifty attitude, it was only natural not to trust people around these parts. Especially because the bar already had a rather bad reputation for attracting undesirables.

Rapping his knuckles on the bar, Tweek murmured to the boy, "A pint of Hogsbreath Mead for my companion." Even though he didn't seem openly hostile, Craig could tell the blond was ready to strike at any moment if need be. They were both on edge, though Tweek was doing a good job of concealing it. Craig, on the other hand, kept scanning the bar. Confidence might have been important, but it was easier to be confident if you were still alive.

"Anything for you?" the bartender asked Tweek, his hands already busying themselves with filling up one of the clear plastic cups with Coca-Cola. The blond shook his head and the bartender shrugged before shoving the drink over to Craig, who caught it and nodded before turning back to the room at large. There was the jingle of coins as Tweek dropped fifty cents onto the bar as payment. As if this had been a signal of sorts, everyone else went back to their conversations, ignoring Tweek and Craig at last.

Unhooking the small thermos that Kenny had given him from his belt, Tweek took a sip of the expresso inside before looking up at Craig, who raised an eyebrow but didn't say anything. Clicking his teeth together jerkily, Tweek leaned back towards the bartender and said, "Not particularly b-busy today, are you."

Glancing up at the blond warily, the bartender shrugged and trained his eyes on the counter. "Too much upheaval for wasting time. This territory changed hands for the third time this week just yesterday." There was a note of accusation in his voice, but Craig shrugged it off, as did Tweek. The boy had a point after all, with how the war had been going, the Humans had been forced to fight tooth and nail for every bit of land they could get their hands on. It was only thanks to Clyde and Butters that they'd managed to take back the territory around the Giggling Donkey back from the Elves at all.

Biting his lip before letting it slip back through his teeth, Tweek shivered and said, "What a shame, I was hoping to find –ghn- s-someone today." The Elf who was sitting at the other end of the bar looked up at them at that, his eyes suspicious. Returning the look with a cool warning in the form of a stare, Craig waited until the other boy had looked away before resuming his earlier task of watching the rest of the tavern and sipping at his drink.

"If you don't see 'em here, stop looking," the bartender advised, his tone gruff. "I don't need any trouble today." It was generally good advice, the mercenaries in the game really didn't like to be messed with, mostly because they'd broken in-game rules and didn't want to deal with the consequences. They were nasty fighters and they tended to gang up on anyone who was getting too nosy. That being said, Craig wasn't worried. His and Tweek's reputations preceded them. No one was going to be picking any fights if they didn't need too.

"Perhaps you c-could tell us where the Bard is, then," Tweek suggested, one hand skating over the numerous weapons around his waist. "I'm sure he could help us instead." The bartender's eyes followed Tweek's movements nervously and his hand twitched towards the sword Craig knew he kept behind the counter, but he didn't draw.

"You know the Bard isn't too friendly with your kind anymore," the boy told Tweek, his voice even yet mildly threatening. "After last week, he'll only talk to Elves. Besides, you should do your business without involving him." Tweek bristled and let out a twitchy growl at that, but Craig surreptitiously reached out a hand and touched the boy's arm, calming him down somewhat.

"We're old friends of the Bard," Craig said, his voice low and quiet. "From before the war even, surely he'd make an exception." The bartender glared at the Noirette; Craig didn't bother to get ruffled. He just stared right back, his blue eyes unswerving. When the man didn't speak, Tweek leaned in and twitched his lips upward in a leering smile.

"Or maybe we could skip all th-that and you could just tell us what we want to know," Tweek suggested, twitching as he spoke. There was something intimidating about it, the way the fur on his coat shivered and rattled slightly and how vivid his eyes looked against the dark war paint on his face, Craig didn't blame the bartender for leaning back slightly, eyes nervous.

"Who're you looking for," the boy finally bit out, looking upset about letting them get to him. Snarl turning to a more pleasant smile, Tweek straightened up.

"Bradley," Tweek said, entirely more amicable now. It was amazing how much one month had changed the boy. He'd entirely settled into his barbarian role and when he knew what he was doing, he acted every bit the intimidating character that he supposedly was. Craig was perfectly content to let the boy act like this, satisfied with being the shadow that followed Tweek rather than the shadow that Tweek hid in.

Even though it was just an act, Craig maintained that Tweek was a very good actor.

Huffing under his breath, the bartender jerked his thumb in the direction of the back room. "Just don't make it messy. I'm sick of having to clean this place up." Tweek's squeaky laugh somehow managed to sound ominous. "I'm serious, do you know how many teeth I've had to pick out of the carpet?" the boy demanded, disgruntled.

"Don't worry, w-we'll let him keep most of his teeth," Tweek reassured the man, shivering as he straightened and looked up at Craig. Raising an eyebrow at the boy, Craig fell into step as Tweek led the way to the back of Jimmy's house, taking only a second to shoot the bartender a cool glance before focusing his attention on what was going on.

Without paying attention to the eyes that were watching them, Tweek walked towards the doors set into the side of the tavern, one of which would take them downstairs and the other which led to the bathroom. As Tweek leaned against the wall beside the door, closest to the rest of the Tavern, Craig waited patiently for the sound of the toilet flushing before putting a hand on the smallest of his knives and standing a little straighter.

The boy who walked out was a rather short fifth-grader with sandy brown hair and the rough outward appearance of many of the other mercenaries around the place. Of course, the moment he saw Craig and Tweek, his eyes went wide and he started to back up. "Oh man, what do you guys want this time?" the boy whined, looking between the two of them nervously. "I didn't do anything, okay? I've been keeping my nose clean, I swear."

Shutting the bathroom door before the boy could trip through it, Craig raised an eyebrow. "Come on, I thought we were friends," he said, his flat tone doing nothing to soothe Bradley's nerves.

"No way man, us? Friends? No one makes friends with people like you two," the boy said, shaking his head fervently. "You two are crazy, I'm not doing this again." Tweek shot the pair of them a look and twitched right. Nodding, Craig drew the butter knife that he still kept around and held it close to the fifth-grader's eyes.

"Fine then, acquaintances," Craig amended, watching as Bradley went cross-eyed trying to keep the knife in view. Lowering the blade slightly, Craig tilted his head slightly and stared down at the scared boy. "Don't look so scared, we just want some information."

Wetting his lips with a darting tongue, the mercenary shook his head. "No, I'm done helping you two. You're bad news, I've heard how you two operate. I'm not making the same mistake twice." Cracking the bones in his neck, Craig took a quick step forward and pressed Bradley against the bathroom door, knife to his throat. Face crumpling in fear, the boy blubbered, "Aw come on, don't do this to me. Things are already bad enough around here without me helping you two."

"Come on, it's just a small favor," Craig informed the boy, making sure not to put too much pressure on the knife. He didn't want to accidentally kill the kid in-game, that would make the whole thing way harder than it needed to be. "We just need some information and we thought you might have heard something."

"Why can't you ask the carrier ravens?" Bradley whined, trying to lean away from the butter knife even though there was nowhere to go. "Why me? I don't want to help you Humans, or the Elves for that matter. You're all bad news! At least the people around here will stab you in the back, you and your factions deal in poison." Rolling his eyes, Craig pressed his knife against the boy's throat a bit harder, causing the boy to squeal, "Dude don't! The healers here are crap, I'll be out of the game for days if you hurt me."

"Th-then maybe you should –ngh- answer the question," Tweek suggested, twitching as he watched the rest of the Tavern. Turning back to Bradley, who was still whining, Craig shrugged, as if to say hey, I wasn't the one who said it.

Letting out a groan, Bradley said, "Okay okay, I'll help you, just get that thing away from me." Pulling back the butter knife just enough to give him room to breathe, Craig shifted his weight and raised an eyebrow. Clearing his throat, Bradley looked pointedly at the blade until Craig had pulled it away and had stored it under his cloak once more before glancing to the side and muttering, "What do you want to know?"

Crossing his arms, Craig tipped his head back and bluntly asked, "Who's been carrying out the sneak attacks on the Humans?" This was what Token had sent Tweek and him here to find out. For weeks now Humans had been getting picked off one by one by a force that seemed to be unconnected to the Elves. Even though it didn't seem like that big of a threat, whoever it was had lost them several key battles because of the people they'd taken out of commission. Sure they'd been able to heal the boys, but not anywhere near fast enough.

Stuffing his hands into his pockets, Bradley scuffed his foot over the ground. "I don't know! I'm not going to mess with that stuff man. Whoever it is, they're bad news." Tweek whipped his head around and let out a growl at that, startling the boy.

"Someone shot Clyde in the head with a p-pink and gold arrow!" Tweek snarled at Bradley, advancing on the mercenary. "He's still out of commission, and we have good healers! S-so start talking or we'll make you –ghn- talk." When the boy looked up at Craig in fear, as if asking him to do something, the Noirette just raised his eyebrows and took a slight step back, as if to say my hands are tied here.

"I mean it!" Bradley insisted, cowering under Tweek's glare, even though the blond was a good five inches shorter than him. "No one knows who they are!"

"So they're not mercenaries as well," Craig clarified, his usual deadpan set on his face. When the boy shook his head fervently, Craig's brows furrowed slightly. "Then who are they?"

"I don't know man." Shivering, Bradley rubbed the back of his neck. "I just know that the Bard has paid his dues, they won't touch him." When Tweek let out an involuntary sound at that, he leaped backward, smacking his head against the door. "The Elves talk to them man, I don't even know who they are!"

Looking to Craig, Tweek jerked left and said, "Rrr- H-he's got a point, Token said they aren't touching the Elves at all, just the humans." Letting out a breath, Craig looked to the side as he slid his teeth together in thought. Damnit, but we can't go back empty-handed. Token needs something to show Cartman then he'll never take him seriously. This, Craig knew, would only lead to further half-finished conversations with the black boy as he tried to figure out the mystery on his own. So we're going to get some information, or we're not going back.

"So if you don't know who they are," Craig finally said, at last, turning back towards Bradley, who started. "Then who does?" When the boy gave another pathetic whine, Tweek let out an exasperated sound. With a twitchy growl, he moved, drawing one of his own wooden knives and shoving it under Bradley's throat. "Tell us," Craig warned, his voice low. "And we'll let you walk away from this in one piece."

"Come on, they're my friends," the boy complained, eyes flickering between Tweek and Craig. "I know some of them are Elves, but we don't care around here. We don't have enough of anything to care. I scrape by on what I can get and they do as well. You can't just come in here and make me give them up. That's not cool."

"We can," Craig told him. "And we will. It's one fucking name Bradley, don't be a bitch about it."

"You're the worst," the boy muttered. Shifting under Tweek's knife, the mercenary said, "It's not like he's been around in a while. You'd have better luck finding them yourselves at this rate." When Tweek twitched hard and let out a rumbling sound, he finally relented and said, "He's an Elf named Philip. He's the one the Bard sends when he wants to talk to these people. But I don't know how much he even knows or if he'll tell you. I'd just give up man."

Drawing back and sheathing his knife, Tweek twitched hard and looked up at Craig, who spent a moment staring into those vivid green eyes before turning back to Bradley. "We'll decide when we give up." Reaching into one of the pouches on his belt, Craig grabbed about a dollar's worth of coins and handed them to Bradley, who looked between the two of them before scurrying around them and through Jimmy's kitchen, no doubt intent on escaping through the back door. Fixing his attention on Tweek, Craig asked, "What now?" only to find the boy staring into the Tavern's main room.

"Ngh- I th-think we're in luck man, Philip's the really tall blond, right?" When Craig nodded, Tweek shivered and jerked his head towards the Tavern. "He's here." Stepping out so he could see what the blond was gesturing at, Craig's eyes widened as he watched the very person they were looking for walk through the door, followed by two other Elven mercenaries. Unlike when Tweek and Craig had entered the bar, the other kids didn't even look up at Philip.

Looking around, Philip's eyes happened to land on Tweek and Craig. Instantly, his hand went to his sword and his eyes narrowed. The Elves beside him went on the defensive as Tweek stepped out of the shadows, leading Craig towards Philip. Tilting his chin up, Craig looked at the other people of the Tavern, who were going for weapons. His expression was a clear sign not to intervene.

"What do you want?" the blond spat. He was a fifth-grader, but unlike Bradley, this boy was taller than even Craig. That being said, the Noirette refused to give an inch. He wasn't scared, why act like it? "I want no business with beings like you." There was enough contempt in the air to stick a spoon in.

"Huh, that's interesting," Tweek said, twitching to the side hard as he stared up at Philip. "What a shame –ghn- we have business with you." Walking right up to the tall boy, Tweek cocked his head to one side and said, "W-what's say we get a drink and talk this out like civilized people?"

Philip bristled, staring down his nose at Tweek. "There is no civility when it comes to Humans. Especially not those who fight for the Grand Wizard King. You have no honor."

"And you do?" Craig asked evenly, raising an eyebrow. "Well, that's news to me."

"Fuck. Off," Philip said clearly, his pale brown eyes narrowing.

"So we're not going to do this the nice way?" Tweek clarified, shifting his weight into a steady stance. In response, the Elf to Philip's left drew his own short sword and growled. Sighing, Tweek's mouth turned up into a wild grin. "W-what a shame." Without warning, his hand flew to his club and he struck.

As the bartender let out a shout and chairs around them scraped against the floor as other boys got to their feet, Craig darted in to cover Tweek. An arrow from the other Elven mercenary flew at Tweek and Craig blocked it easily with a knife. Drawing his own sword, Philip tried to help the Elf that Tweek had originally attacked before Craig caught the boy's blade and lifted an eyebrow in a clear challenge.

"You know," Craig commented, parrying the boy's blows easily as Tweek put the first Elf on the floor and moved on to the archer. "This would have been so much easier if you just agreed to Tweek's offer. This is so much more messy." As Philip let out a yell and lunged in, Craig twisted to the side and managed to catch the boy's stomach with one of his knives. Using the moment while the boy was winded to his advantage, Craig darted in and delivered two quick jabs to each of the boy's kidneys, further incapacitating him.

Suddenly, Philip's sword came around, slamming into Craig's knees. Swearing, Craig stumbled back and lunged in again, unwilling to allow himself to be taken down by a mercenary. Bringing both of his blades around, Craig slammed the flat of one of them into Philip's back while catching the boy's windpipe with the other. As Tweek took out the archer, Craig dragged the tall blond Elf down to his knees where he could lean over him and glare into his eyes.

"Now," Craig said venomously, even with his flat voice. "Let's talk."

"Fuck you," Philip spat, gritting his teeth and growling at Craig, who simply pressed his wooden blade harder against the boy's throat.

"Grr- D-don't talk to him like that!" Tweek snapped, looming over the pair of them, his frying pan raised. When Philip snapped his mouth shut, Tweek let out a rumbling sound before asking, "Who's the new group who's been attacking the Humans?"

Baring his teeth, Philip said, "I don't know." Hardly even irritated, Craig applied more pressure to the boy's windpipe until he had him bending over backward so he could breathe at all.

"Liar!" Tweek hissed, twitching sharply. "We know that you know, s-so why don't we just cut the b-bullshit?" Craig raised an eyebrow at Philip and waited, for either the boy to speak or for Tweek's signal to just kill him.

"It's none of your damn business," the boy growled, unwilling to be cowed by Tweek and Craig. "Why are you even talking to me, we're not on the same team. The Elves and the Humans are at war, that means we don't help each other." He made a good point, but Craig wasn't about to listen to good points, not when they needed this information.

"Well, it's not like the Elves are standing up for you," Craig pointed out, his eyes narrowing ever so slightly. "It's a simple question Philip, just tell us what we need to know. We have it on good information that you're the one who deals with these people for the Bard." Shrugging, Craig said, "Just give us a name."

Clenching his teeth hard enough that Craig could hear them creak, the boy finally said, "I won't give you a name, but I'll give you a location." Letting up the pressure he was putting on the boy's neck, Craig tipped his head up and raised an eyebrow. Coughing, Philip took a moment before saying, "I can't say they'll come or even if they won't kill you on sight, but you can find them outside of the City Hall building."

"That's in –ghn- Elf territory," Tweek pointed out.

Letting out a long, low laugh, Philip barred his teeth in an ugly semblance of a grin. "Well then you'll just have to go into Elf territory, won't you?" When Craig growled and pressed harder on his throat, Philip choked out, "After all, it's not as if the Elves like either of us."

With a sound of disgust, Tweek twitched and muttered, "Come on, Craig. We're n-not getting anything else out of this one." Smoothing out his face till it was his usual disinterested mask, Craig stood up abruptly, letting Philip fall to the floor where he coughed and rubbed at his throat. Sweeping his cloak back around him, Craig moved to stand next to the blond, who was staring around them at the rest of the tavern. No one moved, no one dared.

Wrinkling his nose, Tweek gave a shiver before starting towards the door, Craig on his heels. As they walked away, Philip called out from behind them, "It's not going to make a difference, they don't like you!" Stopping, Tweek slowly turned around, jerking to the right as he did so. Putting a hand on Tweek's arm, keeping him from lunging at the boy, Craig furrowed his brows as the Elven mercenary continued, "They hate the Grand Wizard, you won't be able to pay them off like we can."

"Let us deal with that," Craig said calmly, looking at Tweek as he spoke. "Go back to playing dead." As the shivering blond looked up at him, Craig offered him the barest ghost of a smile before settling his cloak and walking out of the tavern, Tweek at his side.

All in all, he was going to mark this one up as a success…