That feeling was back. The swirling of emotions and thoughts, of memories and experiences that were her and yet not her. The sensation was more subtle and it took Alexis a very quiet moment when she was supposed to be asleep that she recognized the old curse that began her multi-verse traveling.
Her body felt strange. Her surroundings felt as if a painting on an unfinished and ever-changing canvas that perhaps was supposed to be familiar, but wasn't.
Alexis wasn't afraid. And when she discovered the sensation grew when she was farther away from the Decepticons, she made a valiant attempt at distance, for escape had long been discovered impossible.
Barricade would find her, as he had during her other attempts that failed. He was worked up this time, obviously excited as he searched for her. Alexis watched him from the tree she had climbed up all the way to the last branch that was capable of holding her weight.
She ignored him, closed her eyes and tried to concentrate on that universal upheaval that was wakening within her. Alexis didn't care what it did to her as long as it took her away from these monsters and the compliant craziness that was this planet Earth.
The planet that allowed this Thundercracker to dominate and dictate, to set absolute terms for humanity's survival. The travesties he'd committed. The immeasurable amount of lives he'd taken when anyone opposed his perverted scheme of regulation. Alexis had seen small glimpses of the atrocities the other Alexis had experienced in her short life under his dominion. The memories of him having young Alexis' family killed would never fade. Even mostly second-hand the remembrances were still terrifying and a validation of his madness.
The ground vibrated. Something struck against the tree she was in, shaking her out with an unexpected swooping sensation. Alexis tried to grab hold of one of the branches, only for her fingers to fail her every time she grabbed hold, one sharp thick branch ripping through her thin pants and cutting deep along the side of her left leg.
Alexis had at least managed to decrease her downward momentum, able to land haphazardly and roll instinctively to divert what could have been horrible bodily injuries. Her breath was knocked out of Alexis as pain crept up her legs and stilled her. Her vision warbled, static clinging to the edges of her vision.
"Pathetic." Barricade stood above her, poking her body with one of his sharp talons. "You didn't even try this time," he actually whined.
Alexis' world reverberated, pushing out then pulling back in. Voices surrounded her that were a variety of her own, a crescendo of realities whispering and tugging.
It was euphoric as it was chaotic. Made her head buzz when she tried to concentrate on one or two of the visions, the whispers turning into nearly coherent conversations before everything broke up and disappeared, leaving her with a smile on her face that dropped when Thundercracker joined them.
Her eyesight cleared. The Decepticon overlord was limping, energon leaking from a harsh tear on his left leg. The Seeker limped all the way up to Barricade, backhanding him so violently that sections of the scout's face shattered; he was forced to his knees.
"She's been harmed," Thundercracker growled. A strange looking rifle folded out of the Seeker's servo, humming as it armed. He directed it at Barricade's head.
The scout slumped his thick shoulder panels. His optics were directed at the ground as he thought about what, Alexis couldn't figure. His head slowly lifted. He idly looked at the dangerous weapon in his face, before his gaze sharply shifted to her.
"I get it." Barricade husked. His mouthpiece began to curl upward with whatever he felt he knew. His back straightened with some unknown empowerment. "No wonder you…"
The rifle had folded away into a long blade, one that swiped forward, cutting the scout in two.
Barricade didn't finish his words.
Alexis shook her head.
Admittedly, the patches of hope she clung to could make her stubborn at the most dangerous times. But he wasn't going to touch her, not if she could prevent it.
"If you go untreated, your leg will become infected."
Alexis stared beyond Thundercracker. The body of Barricade remained behind them. He was dead. She knew that. And yet the scout's digits were still twitching, energon spilling around him in thick patches, making the grass sizzle and the air smell foul.
The Seeker bent down toward her, trying to grab her. She hissed, kicking out with her good leg, even when she knew it would do no good. Pain rippled up the leg she used, making her drop down in a pathetic lump.
Thundercracker twitched and stilled, back to staring at her, but keeping his distance.
Alexis' attention fell back to the wound on his leg. She shifted her weight onto her right leg, pushed the torn pants out of the way as she stared at her own damaged flesh.
A crazy thought came. She took a deep bracing breath. Then she dug her fingers into the thick gash on her left leg, using what fingernails she still had. Blood seeped, her body swayed. Alexis almost blacked out.
The Decepticon roared, nearly falling forward. Energon gushed anew from his matching wound, creating a strange pattern down his pediform.
"Clever, too," he gagged.
That would have been a terrific time to run. But her thoughts were racing, and her vision was fading. Alexis slumped forward, hardly pleased with her revelations.
He had to knock her out to treat her. By the time Alexis woke, she found Starscream standing by the large examination table she was on. Thundercracker was near. He watched her. She averted her gaze, but not before she scowled at him, showing her teeth.
Starscream was admonishing Thundercracker about something or another, but the blue Seeker wasn't listening. His gaze was hard and intense upon her, watching every twitch of her body, trying to catch her eyes with his optics.
"Well, let's get this over with. This time I will make sure that she won't…"
"Leave us," the Decepticon overlord ordered of Starscream. The red seeker actually flinched from his irreproachable sternness. The Seeker didn't argue, only picked up some tool or another. He gave Alexis a devious look then exited in a flurry.
Thundercracker approached her. She stared down at her bandaged leg, and made an effort not to stare at his, wanting to know, but unwilling to find out. To the Pit with him.
His energy was suffocating, that vibration of his life force trying to overwhelm her with inclinations that once terrified her, but now only rallied her toward firm indifference.
He wasn't Thundercracker. He was…
Her eyes caught on a surgical blade that had been left at the foot of her table. Alexis knew somehow, as she stared at the scary looking apparatus, that if she died this monster would be finished.
She didn't get far. As if he was reading her thoughts, he blocked her path, picked up the surgical blade and threw it far behind her. The sharp device embedded itself into the wall.
"You are the strangest, most insufferable creature." He leaned over her. He forced one of his digits down her treated wound, shivering. Her flesh was numb. Her brain was sharp. The familiar stirring of other universes suddenly piped up inside her, stronger than ever.
"I have a proposition for you." He pressed into her wound, testing those things she didn't want to understand. The Seeker flinched at the same time a flicker of pain stung through her numbed leg, pulling slowly back. His optics locked upon her, his mouthpiece shifting into a strange, eerie smile. "Speak. Say my name. And I will make your life… easier."
What? Inside she was laughing at his stupidity. She'd say his name all right. All he had to do was surrender Earth back to the humans, was leave the planet behind, was send her back to…
"Earth is inconsequential. Say. My. Name."
Startled once more at his chosen words, her head swam with further realizations, more severe than the last ones.
But then her surroundings were swirling again, her eyes alighting with visions that weren't her own. Her body became lighter. Thundercracker spoke strangely, frantically, words and then orders that she couldn't understand. Starscream burst back into the room, trying to restrain her.
By then it was too late.
Her world changed.
She had a backpack of essentials. Alexis had food. She even had a staff weapon that looked exactly like her own. But her recent memories had been erased. How or when, she couldn't figure. She just knew she had come from somewhere distant, somewhere else. A place that had given her exactly what she needed, encoded instructions that remained despite her lack of memory.
Alexis was heading home.
She recognized the compound. Alexis found herself in the cafeteria, then winding through the long empty halls. Everything was in disarray - abandoned, and dirty. There were signs of old battles fought, skirmishes that had been violent and devastating. Then the sounds began. Strange animalistic sounds that made her skin crawl and her legs take off running when they came closer.
Alexis was being hunted.
A day passed. Then another. Trapped in a small damaged lift, she was slowly losing what little oxygen she had left. The loud, mostly unseen creatures remained and waited, snarling and fighting among themselves.
The elevator started to bend and shift. The tearing of metal assaulted her ears as the creatures outside became worked up all over again, now howling and scratching.
Pressure built only to fade away, oxygen increasing as she felt the elevator torn out and pulled upwards.
"I watched you die."
Starscream's optics strayed down her body, glossa dipping out along his lower lip as he examined the small weapon on her hip. A medic was looking her over, only to nod his head slowly at Starscream.
Alexis was going backwards through all the universes she had traveled through. A necessary reversal that wouldn't stop until she was back home. Alexis didn't know how she knew this. But someone had explained it to her, strange visions and conversations trying to remind her of things forgotten. Her head hurt when she tried to recall.
She hung her head. Guilt returning. That Alexis' death had been her fault. Because she'd been so desperate to return home, and the other had only cared about him.
"I'm sorry." Alexis breathed out, because that was all she could manage. They were in an unfamiliar building. There was so much activity. Soldiers were being armed and prepared in the back. Others were passing out equipment and goods. Some were eating on small bunks, others talking with strained whispers.
His optics softened. His hand reached out. He picked her up, led her to an empty viewport and allowed her to look outside. Swarms of shadowed creatures moved outside, most trying to get inside.
"Optimus wouldn't listen to me," Starscream softly explained. "In the time it took me to subdue his command, it was too late."
"I thought…"
Starscream actually smiled, a strained uplifting of mouth that made his optics brighten. "Not everything is as it appears… Alexis."
She remained three more days. Three more days of attacks, of watching vast squadrons leave, only for a few to return. Alexis had her own bunk in an isolated section in the soldier's quarters that was located across the hall from the Seekers'. She knew she was being kept under observation, but she was free to move about while they decided what to do with her.
"She did die. Because of me," Alexis told Starscream after finding him on one of the observation decks. She wanted to tell him this, she just needed to.
There was something strained about the Seeker now, even tormented in the way he looked at her. He didn't speak to her. He was constantly busy though, commanding a diminishing army that fought to contain the ravaged planet. "She was the one that…"
He interrupted her. "Whom are you fighting so hard to return to?"
"My son. And…" Alexis paused. Yes, she felt so guilty. And, yes, she was somewhat relieved that he wasn't all that she thought he was. But she felt strange with trying to confide in him. She remembered what the other Alexis did with him, remembered their last encounter outside the kitchens' hall. Her skin bristled.
His posture became even more inflexible, already tense at the mention of Aaron. "And?" he urged.
Alexis finished what she'd been trying to say. "Him."
His mouthpiece pinched into a tight line, only to turn into a shallow frown.
Without warning, she was pushed backwards into the next universe before he could say anything else.
She had felt guilty because of the other Alexis dying. In this universe, she felt ashamed because of that Thundercracker. And yet Alexis was painfully curious about what happened to the Alexis that had been buried inside the oil rig by Starscream. She hadn't forgotten about her, the memories still with her, as were all the Alexises she had been inside.
Too many memories. Memories that felt like her own, but most certainly weren't. Some terrifying moments she didn't know who she was about, what her motivations were, or even who she loved. What Alexis wanted and what she felt could shift and sway, clashing along with experiences that weren't her own but that had become too ingrained inside her psyche.
How easy it would be to lose herself again. How scared she was that she would. Alone with herself, she seemed more vulnerable than before. Swayed by the past, and most certainly the shadow of the others' lives.
Alexis didn't like peaches. But it took her taking a bite out of the small fruit to realize that. To remember that she liked the scent, but she did not like the taste. She had spent a day working in the fields, promised a meal and all the peaches she could carry upon completion.
At least she like the provided beef stew.
The humans on this Earth were slowly recovering from the Decepticon invasion. They had staved off starvation with farms, had revived long forgotten crafts, depended more on their selves and the kindness of others, managed to create and produce and build, skills that had once been given to factories and machines improved upon. The revival of trading and bartering had created a more personal environment before money and credit cards and on-line shopping had saturated the once digitally altered planet.
Earth was healthier, friendlier, was more peaceful. But the payment for such a world had come at a heavy price. And all the Decepticons hadn't left, despite the fact that their leader Starscream hadn't been seen in years.
So healthier, yes, but still dangerous. For the humans that decided that Earth was worth the effort of staying, it was still a fight for a right to survive on their own planet.
He was following her. The man with the hoodie and the dark eyes. Walking away from the crowd, she turned a corner. Her hand slipped around her staff, the weapon extending.
The man never reemerged.
Alexis didn't have a destination. Just walked where her feet took her, waiting to continue back to the next universe, then the next, her thoughts mostly on her son. She could think of Thundercracker, but her thoughts surrounding him were conflicting and odd, which made her…
Someone appeared from nowhere directly in front of her path. Her hand moved toward her weapon; he charged.
He was strong. He was fast. And he was angry. At her.
Alexis didn't know who he was until the first time his hand touched her shoulder. Energy rippled from his fingers and into her skin.
So much for being dead.
But why was he human?
Dragged off the planet, helpless against the restraints Starscream got on her, he allowed her to keep her staff weapon as if to humor her. His first mistake. Not checking her body for further weapons was a further failing. But he was intent and restless, allowing for further mistakes.
He entered coordinates on his ship's helm from a tablet he held, then disappeared only to return as his Cybertronian self. The Seeker grabbed to her, taking her down long empty hallways.
A strange sound was heard. The sound got louder. By the time he shoved her inside the next room, she knew it was a baby crying.
The baby was small and very warm. The crying stopped the moment she touched the baby girl, the tiny half-Vildan staring at her with wide bright yellow eyes. Alexis' heart tightened.
Allowing her to take the child, he locked her inside a cell. Not a word spoken. But the hostility was apparent. The second time he brought her and the baby some food Alexis managed to escape. But only the holding cell. Searching for a docking bay on the vast unknown ship, she prayed for a working shuttle.
Alexis never found one. And by the time he found her, she was still at a loss about what to do.
"What happened to her mother?" Alexis asked of Starscream when he returned when he thought her asleep. He didn't speak to her. He didn't ask her questions. His lack of curiosity concerned her. Alexis stood to her feet, grabbed to the cell bars and watched the stinging energy run down her fingers.
"Let go," he commanded of her.
She didn't.
"Answer me," Alexis demanded of him.
He refused.
So she held on until her body went numb, her eyelids heavy. Until he turned off the energy field, which made her immediately fall forward. Her head hit the metal cage hard. Blood oozed down her forehead.
He cursed.
She almost blacked out.
The baby began to wail.
"I have decided." Starscream approached the cell, an odd smile lifting up the corner of his mouth. "We will return to how things were between Alexis and I before… this." He sneered at the small baby coddled in her arms, but somehow she knew he wasn't talking about the small child, but the male who'd fathered her.
This Starscream was volatile. Dangerously enigmatic.
And entirely deranged.
He might not have known exactly who she was, but he knew she wasn't that Alexis. An Alexis that was dead. No other way would she abandon her child to him.
Shoving the fear down, Alexis took a breath and opened her mouth, proving to him with words, with statements and with facts that she wasn't that Alexis. She wasn't going to replace the one that he knew. And whatever he thought was going to happen was not on any plane of possibility.
Starscream only listened to her ramblings until he was too agitated to listen further.
She needed to get away from him. Find safety for the child, maybe even find out what happened to…
The sensation returned. Alexis had just enough time to carefully place the baby on the floor when the universal shifting began again.
This time she found herself in the middle of a busy street. Nobody noticed when she emerged out of nowhere, far too busy getting to work, to school, to wherever and everywhere. Tears welled in her eyes. The phantom cry of a baby overlapped the sounds of traffic and walking pedestrians.
Alexis' journey continued. Into one universe and then the next, the reversal of her initial travels repeated until, unexpectedly, they stopped.
She didn't recognize the world she was on now. Standing on a hill, Alexis looked at the land in front of her. Strange automatic machines were breaking the earth up, turning trees and bushes and dirt into tiny shards that covered the ground as if sand. Sand that went on and on and on.
The decimation was ugly, unending and spreading. Stray patches of sharp metal sprouted from the earthly assault.
The first thing found her only a couple hours after her arrival. The creature, the robot, looked like a Cybertronian, but more organic. It didn't speak, its blank visor finding her despite her being several hundred of feet away.
She killed the first one. If it was even alive. It took creativity and her staff weapon, the drone like creature not struggling as it powered down after her sloppy assault.
Alexis avoided everything. Especially when she saw that there were larger drones than the first one she encountered, ones that were far more advanced, and intuitive.
Alexis hid. She scrounged for food when she could. Until her heart began to strain, pressure building under her chest that made her bury herself under a small partially uprooted tree.
Later that night, the pressure faded suddenly away, giving her the energy to try to stand.
She didn't walk far when she was found.
