Kaiserschmarrn

Mordred was grinning by the second they entered the street leading up the hill to the little holiday home.

Mordred was fidgeting by the time they saw it.

Mordred was out of the car and halfway across the parking space before Gawain's combo even stopped.

As a result he did. Abruptly.

"Mordred-!" His voice was strained as he stared after his sister - who, by now, was more-or-less jumping up and down in the middle of the parkway, glaring at him impatiently.

Gawain sighed as Artoria tapped his shoulder reassuringly. "She is merely excited to see him."

Jeanne nodded, glancing at the text she had gotten from Shakespeare.

*The Snow Princess said you'd arrive earlier - thought you'd want to know that Vlad, Darnes and Kairi are going to be there already, and Siegfried's arriving a day after you.

See you there.*

0:0:0:0

Mordred couldn't stop tapping her foot impatiently, or working her hands or -something, really.

Her former Master was here!

It had taken her such a long time to look for him, and now he was in the building across her!

"Hurry up, you oaf!" She shouted after Gawain, who grumbled in response.

The nerve of him! She couldn't wait for him to meet his former Master, because she'd do the exact same for him, making her wait!

"Now, Mordred," her father called over, "what did we talk about meeting old comrades?"

"Uh." She stopped fidgeting. "That I give them at least a second before I do something ridiculous?"

Artoria nodded. "Exactly." She put her hand on Mordred's shoulder. "And?"

The blonde scrunched up her eyebrows. "Aaand… hug-tackling is only allowed on the former Master and no one else?" She batted her eyelashes for good measure.

The hand on her shoulder turned stiff. "…yes, well. Alright." A sigh. "And now off you go."

Mordred was gone faster than Artoria could blink.

She shook her head, walking back to the two parked cars. Jeanne blinked. "Hug-tackling a former Master?"

The petite King chuckled while taking her luggage. "I… might have done the same, you see? So it would have been hypocritical."

Jeanne nodded.

"Well, if I might interject, sire-" Lancelot grinned. "It was more of a flying tackle, I think."

"Wh- LANCELOT!" Artoria spluttered.

0:0:0:0

Kairi was having a strange day.

It had started with Mrs. Einzbern smiling to herself as he had made his way down for breakfast, followed by an ';-)'-emoji by Shakespeare and a bland look on his fellow Romanians' faces.

He'd gone to the reception to ask Shirley about it.

And then he was squashed in a bear hug by his former Servant, who had burst into the foyer.

Shirley was laughing, and Kairi could make out something that sounded like incoherent rambles of 'damn time already' from the pint-sized knight that had him in a death grip.

He blinked slowly as the door opened again, revealing a rag-tag bunch of people with luggage, a copy of his dead weight at the helm of the group.

"Uh-"

The copy shook her head. "Mordred, we said 'a second's notice', not a 'bursting in without warning'."

He could feel his weight shift in place, before a head poked out from its former location - buried in his chest - grinning sheepishly. "Sorry, Father."

Kairi blinked again, slowly, as Mordred detached herself from him and took a step back, rubbing the nape of her neck.

King Arthur was about to say something else when - with a cheerful smile and a spring in her step, Mrs. Einzbern opened the restaurant doors and joined the mismatched group of people.

"Saber! It's great to see you again!"

Then the former homunculus did a great imitation of Mordred before, because she took some swift steps until she stood before the small blonde, and swept her off her feet in a tight hug that had Kairi grimacing at how painful it looked.

To the King's credit, she merely looked on blandly as she was fussed over like a child, an empty look in her eyes as everyone else took a step back.

With one redhead taking two.

His former pint-sized Servant had found her way next to him. Kairi directed his own bland look into her direction. She grinned. "Welcome to the family, I guess?"

Mrs. Einzbern squealed suddenly, letting go of the King. "You must be Shirou!"

Kairi blinked for another good measure.

0:0:0:0

Ten minutes and a flurry of activity later, they were sitting at the round table in the center of the restaurant, talking.

Her former Master had finally snapped out of his daze and was grinning at Shirou as he was being man-handled by Irisviel, a look of utter amusement etched on his features.

…well, to be fair; Gawain and Lancelot were doing the same, and Rin was cackling not all too discreetly. Even Jeanne hid a smile.

They were waiting for the others to show up, filling the silence with small-talk.

"And Ilya has been talking so much about you!" Irisviel cooed. "She's going to be so happy that you're here~"

Mordred wisely decided to never let the useless Flower Magus and this overexcited (not-) homunculus meet. It would not bode too well.

It actually was amazing, really; how easily she and Kairi fell back into comfortable banter.

"An' Vlad is some form of old royalty, as well as the owner of a successful merchandising line."

Jeanne looked interested. "Oh? I hadn't heard the royalty part before."

He grinned. "Ask him yourself, I'm sure he'd love to elaborate. Anyways, I'm his hired 'bodyguard'-"

Mordred snorted.

"-and Darnes is the CEO."

She grinned. "Oh, how the tables have turned. The Masters are the Servants now!"

"Pfft, you wish." Kairi grinned back.

A lull formed, everyone content to sit back for a second.

"You know," Rin spoke, "it's actually pretty nice like this - not having to work."

Sakura looked scandalized. "Nee-san!"

Rin continued. "I mean, being waited on, being the customer… I've almost forgotten how it feels."

"You don't say." Galahad nodded.

Irisviel blinked. "That much work right now?"

The air turned stale. Guinevere's unimpressed expression summed up the feeling quite well.

Bland looks and gazes were shared.

"…"

Iri flinched in sympathy.


Kürbiskernöl Parfait

Roughly an hour after arriving in the hotel, small groups had formed, everyone catching up on what had happened until then; Shirou was being interrogated by Irisviel and Kiritsugu, the three waiting for Ilya to come home from school.

"She's not on vacation, yet?"

Iri shook her head. "Starting the day after tomorrow."

Shirou nodded sagely, somewhere between warily glancing at the woman and wanting to have some alone-time with Kiritsugu after all this time.

Thankfully she seemed to notice, because she smiled a dazzling smile. "I'll go look after Shirley; you two talk some."

And the former Magus Killer and his son were left alone in the kitchen.

0:0:0:0

Just outside, still seated at the table, Lancelot and Sakura were talking to Kariya, and Rin had gone searching for 'some annoying seaweed.'

Kariya had shaken his head at that. "Shinji's gotten better."

The former Tohsaka had done the same, regret seeping in. "Maybe…"

Now, the remaining three were laughing together.

"I do have to say though," Kariya remarked with a fond-ish smile, "it is nice to understand what you're saying."

Lancelot had a pained expression. "I'd say."

"Both of you, stop." Sakura glared at them. "This is supposed to be a time of celebrations - we can anguish in self-pity in the evening, when we're drunk." She blinked, reconsidering, glancing at Lancelot. "Well. When we're not-quite-as-sober, I guess. Your tolerance is pretty high, I take?"

It was Kariya's turn to blink as his former Berserker nodded slightly. "Better than most, at least."

"You two…"

0:0:0:0

Mordred and Kairi were outside, Jeanne and Vlad sitting at a table next to them, while Darnic was leaning against the wall, unimpressed.

"So let me get this straight;" he begun, glancing at Mordred sharply. "All of the main Roundtable Knights work in or around a Café. A. Café."

Mordred and Jeanne nodded.

The Saint piqued in. "I work in a bookstore."

Darnic waved her off. "You are Jeanne d'Arc - that's expected."

Vlad hid his smirk by drinking as the Saint bristled.

Darnic still blinked. "Why?!"

"Ah…" Mordred halted.

"You know, that was something I was wondering as well, kiddo."

"Uh," the former Knight of Treachery stopped. "Funny story, that. See, the Queen's parents bought a small cafe and left it for Guinevere, who took over with Father. All of us simply… followed suit."

Silence reigned. "I can't believe it…" Darnic shook his head.

Vlad grinned, a small, fond smile on his face. "Follow your dreams and all that, Darnic!"

The former head of Yggdmilenia stared. His eye begun to twitch.

Jeanne sensed tension. Jeanne choose to interfere.

"Ah- uh, Vlad. I heard you're royalty?"

"Hm?" The former count blinked. "Ah, yes; my grandfather is the former King of Romania - he was abdicated in 1947." He paused as the words sank in, Mordred whistling. "I'm cousins-or-something with Lady Irisviel, funnily enough; she's part of the Hohenzollern branch of the former Royal Family."

"Huh," Mordred blinked. "That makes you more royal-blooded than Father."

0:0:0:0

Something occurred to Jeanne shortly after.

"Say, Mordred. Why didn't Jack come, though?"

"You mean the little Assassin? She's around as well?" Kairi asked, surprised. "I thought you didn't like her."

Mordred waved him off, choosing to sit next to Jeanne. "Nah, Jack's really nice. Agravain - my older not-brother - adopted her a few months ago, but she still needs to do all of the paperwork and stuffs. She's stuck in Britain until then."

"How unfortunate," Vlad amended, "even though it seemed that this year almost all would be able to make it."

Mordred glanced at him, before noticing something blond from the corner of her eye. Artoria was exiting the hotel, glancing into their direction. Mordred promptly turned around and waved at her father, before resuming the talk. "Right, about that - who's coming?"

The Romanian businessman sighed. "Shakespeare organized everything, Siegfried is from around here - up north somewhere, working together with the Baron Münchhausen, as of late - Astolfo will be here, obviously, as well. Atalanta, Achilles and Chiron also made it, though I heard Karna is unable this year."

Mordred whistled. "And the others?"

Kairi spoke before Vlad could. "Most of the Masters we haven't found or they aren't awake, and the other Servants are likewise MIA. The same goes for many homunculi, though Mrs. Einzbern has an impressive amount of former ones working for her - Sieg's not amongst them, but someone named Rani."

"…Rani…" Mordred blinked. The name sounded familiar somehow. "Eh, whatever."

0:0:0:0

"I see," Kiritsugu nodded. "So you're the son of the famous chef, then."

There was an awkward pause, neither knowing what to say.

Shirou clicked his tongue. "I won't say that I'm all that happy to hear what you did before you found me - for the record - but I can't exactly fault you for it, considering my own work after the Grail War."

Kiritsugu nodded. "Shirou, I-" He shook his head. "No. That is a stupid request."

The redhead raised his brow. "I'm all ears, old man."

"I was wondering… if I still could be your 'old man', regardless of your true father. Despite everything."

To the sort-of-not-really-spy's surprise, Shirou laughed. "Let me tell you something; Saber has a 'son' not twenty metres from us, is here with her fiance and with her 'wife', has a step-brother and adoptive father back in Britain, and is the daughter of the famous Archeologists who found Avalon." He rolled his eyes, the former tension disappearing. "Of course you'll be my old man!"

Kiritsugu blinked. "…while I am glad to know," he noted duly, "that explanation did not make much sense, Shirou."

"Yeah, we get that a lot-"

His son was interrupted, rather rudely, by an open-flung door and a small white fairy barreling into his stomach; Ilya, Miyu and Chloe all had arrived from school, it seemed.

"Onii-chan!" His (this time) adopted daughter glanced up at Shirou with tears in her eyes.

Kiritsugu felt a smile worm its way into his heart at the sight.

"Onii-chan, what do you mean by fiance!?"

The smile slipped off as fast as it appeared. Chloe snickered, while Miyu tried to do damage control, but Kiritsugu latched onto a part of the explanation he had glossed over, before.

"Yes, son." Shirou visibly winced. "What do you mean by 'fiance?'"

0:0:0:0

Rin had been wandering the halls of the hotel, searching for the sorry excuse of a life that Shinji had been, but she felt lost. "Great. A flight of stairs and a confusing door and I'm lost already."

"Are you searching for someone, Rin?"

Rin turned around, eyes narrowing at the unfamiliar voice. "Who… are you?"

The unfamiliar, Indian-looking girl with soft hair smiled slightly. "I am Rani. I fought against and together with a Not Quite You in the Moon Cell Grail War."

Rin blinked. "I'm searching for Shinji."

The stranger(?) nodded. "He is currently cleaning the pool. I'll show you the way there, if you'd follow me."

"Right."

They walked a short while, before something occurred to her. "…you wouldn't know a blonde-haired knight in the saber-class by the name of Gawain, would you?"

"Yes." Rani nodded, while they rounded the corner. "He was the Servant of Leonardo B. Harwey, why?"

"Oh, nothing, nothing."

0:0:0:0

Artoria was looking around the foyer, patiently going from one picture to the next. She had gone with Irisviel to get Ilya and her sisters inside, but the small fairy all but ignored her in her single-minded focus on getting to Shirou.

It was fine, really; this was their moment, not hers.

"You could stop pacing, at least." Gwen smiled at her from her porch next to Shirley, both engrossed in some fashion magazine.

Irisviel nodded. "You're making me nervous with your pacing. It's not as if something will happen."

She furrowed her brows. "I do not know - I have this feeling of having forgotten something important."

Maiya shook her head.

Galahad did the same, from his porch next to the reception desk. "What could be important enough to warrant the pacing, Sire?"

Artoria stopped, turned, and walked the other way. "Still - there is something I forgot to tell you, Iri. I know."

"Well, it couldn't have been that important if you can't remember."

"Lady Einzbern is right, you know, dear." Gwen nodded into the albino's direction. "You'll remember it later."

She huffed. "All right, fine. I will stop thinking about it!"


Welcome to Germany!
Mordred's very happy to finally be the center of attention, it seems. And meet Kairi and Vlad, my lovely gruff people from Romania 3 I love them.
(And on a side note, the familiar ties Vlad mentioned are actually a thing. The Hohernzollern family is stupidly widespread across all of Europe (there's no Erlenbruck branch, though))

And say hello to forgetful Artoria. I wonder what she forgot?
Also, a Merry Christmas already now, because there won't be a special chapter this year, due to real life reasons. It will update regularly in two weeks, though.

Anyhow, onto the Reviews:

gold crown dragon: Yup! Apo reunion is incoming, with shenanigans.

Khaneto: I hadn't planned it, with da Vinci stating that she's had to have surgery to do so. The reunion is the current Germany Arc, so there's more to come, and Issei and the others are still in Japan.
As for the special, well, yeah. Sadly there's none.

Universe Creator: Ah, thank you! I really confused it quite often, so this'll be handy in the future. I hope I did it right this time.

Delca: She is, don't worry!
And its only an Apo reunion, but a complete Zero one could technically be done... hmm...

seikhrajela: Considering only Gawain, Galahad, Mordred and Lancelot are around, and Artoria warned them about him, there won't be such a severe reaction, but they're not necessarily on good terms per se. but we'll see.

Nexus Infinity: Obviously!
Ah, no. It's the same guy as the chapter before that one, where they went looking for a home. And burglars aren't so smart, most of the time, in my humble opinion - these simply were especially stupid.
Jeanne hitched a ride, 'cause she's terrible at navigating with a car, and the hints are more like... morsels. (The only hint is Cardiff, everything else is foreshadowing, I can tell as much)

Vhosek: Yep, they did! Won't cross the cafe twice. And I'd recon Pery and Astolfo would get along swimmingly... if the canon!Percival is like mine, anyways.

GhostXavier: Who doesn't love Agravain and his uncomfortable interaction with Jack?

Outside perspective was fun to write, and the shout-out to Charlemagne is me hoping he'll be as interesting as his artwork/what we know of him already. And shenanigans are a must with such a group, no?

And as always,
Happy Baking Everyone!