Chapter 53
Angel, Wings of Fire
In the weeks following the announcement of her intention to run for President, Laura Roslin granted a series of exclusive interviews to D'Anna Biers in which she talked about the many problems facing the citizens of Caprica and her plans to resolve them. The pictures, however, taken by Biers' cameraman of Roslin's family were what captured the attention of most of the people. The issue of The Caprican View with its cover photograph of Roslin, her husband, stepdaughter and smiling infant son sold out and went into a second printing. The accompanying article entitled Defying Convention was considered one of Biers' best journalistic efforts to date.
-Bartell, History of the Second Cylon War
.
Sharon was studying when Kara entered their room late Sunday afternoon and dropped her duffel bag on the bed.
They exchanged greetings and Kara went about unpacking as she had two weeks earlier.
"How was your brother's ceremony?" Sharon asked.
"Nice. You should have come."
"I thought it was only for your family."
"No. Friends and family."
"I should have come, then."
"You should have. So should Karl."
"Karl didn't show up?"
"Nope." Kara tried not to let her hurt feelings show. "I'm sure he had something better to do than come to a baby's dedication ceremony."
"I turned Cadet Pike down for a date."
"I'm glad. Not that I mean you shouldn't…go out with somebody. Just not him."
"I don't want to go out with anybody but Karl."
"I understand how you feel."
"You only want to go out with Lee."
"Right."
"Karl was jogging yesterday afternoon. We ran together for about ten minutes. We didn't say much, but he…seemed like he was okay with being around me."
"You're doing the right thing letting him take his time." Kara started to tell Sharon about what had happened over the weekend and then changed her mind. "Lee starts War College out here tomorrow."
"What's War College?"
"He'll study…actually I'm not sure exactly what he'll study. I think they'll be given certain…scenarios and they'll have to come up with solutions. My dad told me part of it is learning to work together as a team and to build good battle plans."
"Who goes to War College?"
"I'm not sure how they decide who gets accepted. You have to apply."
"Lee's smart, isn't he?" Sharon asked.
"Smart enough that I wonder what he's doing with me."
"Why? You're smart, too."
"I'd never make it through War College. I don't think conventionally enough. My dad calls it outside-of-the-box."
Sharon looked puzzled. "I don't understand what that means."
Kara laughed. "Don't worry about it. Neither do I."
As Sharon went back to her homework, Kara wondered how to explain outside-of-the-box to a Cylon. It wasn't something you could explain. It was something you had to understand. It was probably not something a Cylon would ever be able to do. Kara had no idea how you would program outside-of-the-box.
...
Laura put her sleeping son in his crib and tucked the blanket over his shoulders. She was tired. Today had been a long day and Braedon's schedule was off because of the ceremony and the get-together afterward. He had been hungry and cranky when they finally got away and had cried all the way home in the car. One thing she could say about her son, he had a very well-developed set of lungs. His bath, usually such an enjoyable time, had been another ordeal, even with John helping her. She wondered again how she was going to do this and run for President.
Tomorrow was the big day that she would make her announcement to the press. After that there was no turning back.
Wearily she walked into the den. John was sitting on the couch staring at the fire. He had a drink in his hand. She had no idea if it was his first or second or even third.
He patted the cushion on the couch beside him and she took a seat. Without a thought she reached for the glass and downed the rest of his drink before she handed it back to him.
"Long day," John finally said.
"Long day," she agreed.
"They're going to get longer…and rougher. Are you sure you want to make that announcement tomorrow?"
"I've gone too far to back out now."
"You're going to have to hire a nanny. You realize that, don't you? You can't keep doing all you do for Braedon and run for President, too. I'll do everything I can to help, but unless I quit my job…" he didn't finish the sentence.
"No. I would never ask you to do that. You have an obligation to your students and to Kara. You have an obligation to Bill because he's counting on graduating pilots for his plan. I'll ask around. There are a number of women in the government who are raising young children. The Secretary of Health and Human Services has several children. I know she's had help and I know her well enough that I can ask her for a recommendation."
"Once you make that announcement, your life…our lives are going to become a media circus."
"I'll do my best to shield you from that."
"Laura, it's not me I'm worried about. I can handle it. I don't want Kara to suddenly become fair game for the paparazzi. She's got enough on her as it is."
"I know. I realize what my running is going to do to all of us. I'll call Colonel Winters tomorrow and talk to him about making sure Kara's protected from the press."
"She's safe at the Academy. Access is controlled at the gate, but when she's away from there, I don't want her followed and hounded by photographers shouting questions at her because they think they can get to you through her."
"I'll talk to D'Anna Biers. Most of the other journalists respect her. If she puts out the word to leave Kara alone, it will probably happen. Of course I'm sure I'll have to grant her some exclusivity…maybe an interview or two with the whole family."
"You get Biers to keep the others off Kara and let her finish her year at the Academy and Flight School in peace, and I'll do whatever she wants in the way of interviews. I'll even smile and act like I'm enjoying it."
"I'll do my best."
John got up and went to the liquor cabinet.
"How many is that?" She asked.
"This will be my second. Is that a problem?"
"No problem. Pour me a small one, will you, please?"
"You're sure?"
"It should be out of my system before I feed Braedon again. I'm going to have to start supplementing with a bottle anyway."
John handed her the drink and sat down. They sipped in silence for a while.
Finally Laura said, "Let's talk about what else is bothering you."
"Where do you want me to start?"
"With whatever is bothering you the most."
He shrugged. "I guess I want the impossible. For things to go back to the way they were."
"Were…when?"
"When I felt like I meant more to you than I do now."
His words hit her hard and they hurt because they were true. Since Braedon's birth she had let John take a back seat in her life. Braedon and her job had crowded out most of the time they would have spent together.
"I have been ignoring you lately not because you don't mean as much but because even I can do only so much." She reached out and squeezed his hand. "And you've always helped with Braedon and been here for me."
He gave a soft laugh. "That makes it sound like I'm jealous of our son. He comes first in your life. I know that. I'm expecting too much. I'm not being fair to you."
She slid closer to him and put her head on his shoulder. "I've not done a very good job with us though, have I? My job…Baltar and his virus…Bill's plan…the Presidential decision. I've let other things get in the way."
"The story of my life," he said lightly. "Even Kara wants to get reacquainted with her other dad."
"Her…other dad?" Laura asked in confusion. "I thought he died on Picon."
"I did too until he turned up alive in Caprica City. She saw him yesterday for the first time in nearly ten years."
"Oh, John. I'm so sorry."
"No, don't be. It's something Kara has got to do. She needs to come to terms with how she feels about him. The only way she's going to do that is to see him and talk to him. I'm dealing with it. Poor kid. I just don't want to see her get her heart broken if he doesn't turn out to be what she expects. He walked out on her once before and never looked back. Of course that might have been mostly my fault. If I could have stayed away from his wife…"
"You think Kara blames you for him leaving?"
"On some level, yeah."
"She loves you very much, John."
"That just makes it harder to deal with. I love her so much and I want to help her. I'm having such a tough time letting her find her own way. I wasn't a part of her life for so many years, and now I think I'm trying too hard to make up for it."
"And I'm making your life harder."
"All I'm asking Laura is that you not shut me out. I don't want to be relegated to nothing but the President's husband."
She smiled. "You've elected me already."
"Me and the rest of the people of Caprica. It's going to happen, Laura."
"If it does happen, you'll be by my side. You'll be the best-looking First Spouse in history," she said lightly.
He laughed. "First Spouse. That's a good one. Just please, gods, don't tell me I'm going to have to host teas and that kind of stuff. That's not me and you know it."
"John, you're going to keep teaching at the Academy. There may be some…security considerations…but I don't want you to have to change your life to accommodate me. I'm the politician in the family. You married into the lifestyle. It doesn't mean you have to embrace it a hundred percent." She took a deep breath. "More of the responsibility for raising our son may fall to you for several years."
"I've already accepted that. I don't mind. It'll never make up for the years I missed with Kara, but I'm looking forward to being a father to Braedon."
She took the drink from his hand and then put it, along with hers, on the coffee table. She turned her face to his. "I don't tell you nearly enough how lucky I am to have you in my life. I don't thank you often enough for everything you do for our son or for the way you're just quietly here for me."
"There are times I wake up and I still want to pinch myself because I think I should be back on a cot in a hangar in Delphi. I found something with you that I didn't think I'd ever have again. I'll deal with you being President, Laura. I'll do whatever it takes."
Their kiss was as inevitable as what followed, the desire quicker and hotter than she would have believed possible given how tired she had felt half an hour earlier, but as she welcomed his touch and his kisses, everything washed from her mind except the flickering of the firelight on their bodies and the spiraling crescendo of desire that finally left her spent in his arms.
She knew how much emptier her life would be without him. She tried to imagine not having her beautiful son or a daughter she was still getting to know. She didn't even want to think about the loneliness of her life before she had met him.
"Let's go to bed," she finally whispered, "or we'll fall asleep right here. Tomorrow is going to be another very long day."
He kissed her gently. "As long as they end like this occasionally, you'll never hear me complain."
...
Tuesday morning in history class, Kara sat down beside Karl, "Thanks for coming to my brother's dedication ceremony Sunday afternoon. The support of my friends was totally underwhelming."
Karl looked abashed. "Sunday? I thought it was next week."
"Wrong."
"You're not kidding me. I really missed it?"
"You missed it."
"I'm sorry Kara. I'm really sorry. I've had other things on my mind."
"I didn't have the best weekend either."
"What happened?"
"I'll tell you about it later."
"Meet me this afternoon in the student union at 16:00. We'll talk. Man, Kara, I'm sorry. I feel like I've let you down."
"Join the crowd," she said.
...
Karl was waiting when she got there. She got a drink from the machine and joined him.
"So tell me what happened," he said.
Kara spent the next twenty minutes telling him about everything she had done, about seeing Dreilide Thrace again and her fight with Lee. When she finished, he asked her, "Does that mean you're not seeing Lee anymore?"
"He says we're still going to see each other. We just won't be going back to his apartment."
"Ouch."
"Sucks, doesn't it?"
"You think he's not going to suffer, too. It's probably going to be a lot harder on him, no pun intended."
"I should have kept my mouth shut."
Karl sat for a minute. "If I tell you something will you promise not to tell Sharon?"
"You know you can tell me anything and I won't tell anybody if you say not to."
"Maggie came to see me Sunday afternoon. I was in my room studying when the lieutenant at the desk sent somebody up to get me."
"So that's why you forgot about Braedon's dedication ceremony?"
"No, Kara, I swear. I really thought it was next Sunday."
"So what did Maggs want? As if I don't already know. Some sack time again with her first love."
"No, you're wrong. She did not want that. She wanted to tell me she was sorry Sharon and I had broken up. She told me that if I needed somebody to talk to, I could call her."
"She wants more than that from you."
Karl shrugged. "I think you're wrong. So are you going back to see Thrace anytime soon?"
"Probably Saturday morning."
"By yourself?"
"It's not that bad a neighborhood. I can take a transport."
"I'll go with you, Kara."
"Thanks, Karl, but I'll be okay. I'd like for you to meet him someday. But I've got to…it's going to take a while. He and I have got some catching up to do first."
"Yeah, like ten years' worth. Don't forget that he's the one who left you and your mom, Kara. Don't jump into this thing too quick. I wouldn't want to see you get hurt again."
"I'm immune. I got over what he did a long time ago."
But had she? Kara thought of the song her father had played a few bars of, Diaspora, the song that had started the fight with Lee. Dreilide Thrace said he thought about her every time he played it. She wondered now how often that was.
...
Lee was sitting in the lobby of her dorm when she got back from the student union that afternoon. There was a book open on his lap and he had a yellow highlighter in his hand. He glanced up as she came through the front door. He closed the book, capped the highlighter, stuck it in his pocket and stood. She walked over to him.
"Hi," she said.
"I missed you yesterday. By the time we got out of orientation, you were at dinner."
"How did it go?"
"Orientation was long and boring. We met with Colonel Winters, toured the campus, and went over the course outline and expectations. Then they split us into teams and we did some team bonding exercises."
"How many are in your class?"
"In the whole class there are sixty of us. Each team is five people. There are lieutenants, captains and a couple of majors. One thing they told us, though, is that everyone on the team is equal when it comes to the assignments. Shelley is in the class. In fact we're on the same team."
Kara took a quick breath. "How did that happen?"
"Chance. We drew numbers out of a box. Everybody who drew number one is on a team, number two is another team. There's a dozen teams."
"I'm happy for you."
"Kara," Lee said. "Look at me." She raised her eyes to his. "I told you this so you wouldn't find out about it some other way and think I'd tried to keep something from you. This was a coincidence, nothing more. She's part of the past, but that doesn't mean I'm going to be rude to her."
"You're still going to be with her every day. You used to have a thing with her."
"Kara, stop," he said softly and glanced at the lieutenant at the desk. "Let's go outside a minute. I don't feel like we can really talk in here, and I have something I want to say to you."
He put on his coat, picked up his book, and they walked down the steps of the dorm. At the bottom he took her hand.
"I've thought about this a lot. About what I said to you Sunday. I wasn't fair to you. I was hurt. You're right. I keep things inside too much. Over the last two nights I played that song Diaspora probably thirty times. I'm going to tell you something about myself and you'll probably think less of me after I tell you, but I'm going to tell you anyway."
"What?"
"After Blaire broke up with me while I was on the Triton, I couldn't let go of it. I…blamed myself…I started questioning myself, my decision to become a pilot. I was a mess. About a week later we were practicing combat landings and I missed one. I'd never missed a landing before like that. The LSO waved me off the first time and the second time I came around, I missed the trap and long story short, I damaged a Viper, not bad, but the crew had to work on it."
Lee took a deep breath. This was more difficult than he had thought it would be, admitting how he'd frakked up to Kara. He could tell by her expression that she was waiting for him to go on.
"My CAG called me in and asked me what the hell was going on. I told him nothing and he told me that he was pulling me from flight-ready status unless I came up with a better answer than nothing since I'd never had problems with landings before, so I told him about the Dear Lee letter I'd gotten from Blaire. He gave me a book…self-help stuff. He's a good guy. He left me on flight-ready status and worked out my schedule so that I didn't have to fly for a week. None of it went in my record. It gave me time to read the book and…put some things in perspective. I didn't miss any landings after that."
"Why didn't you want to tell me that? I don't think less of you for it. I've screwed up in the simulator plenty of times. Things happen when you're upset."
"This wasn't the simulator. This was on a battlestar in front of the crew. I've never told anybody what I did before, not even your dad. I graduated at the top of my class from Flight School. The mistakes I made weren't even worthy of the greenest nugget. And you're so tough, I thought you'd think I was…weak, but I knew that if I could admit this to you, I could tell you anything."
"You really think I'm tough? I'm not that tough. Especially lately."
"Kara, a lot of people who had been through even a fraction of what you've been through would be a frakked-up mess, so I think you're really tough and I admire you for it and I realize I've got to handle things better. You said something that hurt me Saturday night and I over-reacted and I'm sorry."
Kara realized from how tightly he was holding her hand how difficult it had been for him to admit what he just did to her.
"So what does this mean?" She asked him.
"That I've got to try harder with you. Are you willing to let me try?"
"Are we still not going to your apartment?"
He took another deep breath. "Not for a while. I've thought about this a long time. Kara, I don't want us to…just fall back into the same old routine. So…I can't believe I'm saying this, but my idea is let's try to go a few places on Saturdays and have some fun and talk…and not go back to the apartment for a while and see how things go."
"Okay. I'm willing to try. I don't have much choice."
"Yes, you do. You have a couple of choices. You can say okay or you can tell me you don't care about my idea and you want to go to my apartment and keep things the way they are."
"You'd do that if I asked you to?"
"If that's the only way you'll have me, I'll take it. I love you, Kara. I've told you what I want to try. Now you tell me what you want to do. You make the call."
The pain began to lift from Kara's heart.
"Okay. So since we're going to try things your way for a while, what do you want to do Saturday?"
"Are you going to see Thrace?"
"I think so…in the morning."
"Then call me when you leave there. We'll meet downtown. I want to take you to the Caprica Museum of Fine Art."
"Lee Adama wants us to spend time looking at paintings?"
"You have something else you want us to do?"
"No, looking at paintings is fine. I might find I like it."
"You've never been to an art museum before?"
Kara snorted. "Do I look like I'm into fine art? Is this some dress-up place or can I wear my jeans?"
Lee smiled. "You can wear your jeans. Now, I'd better let you go in. You'll have to line up for dinner soon." He leaned over and kissed her gently.
As much as Kara wanted to pull him to her and really get into the kiss, she knew that wouldn't be the best thing right now for either of them. He had made a real effort with her tonight and she respected that. As difficult as it was, she kept her response just as gentle.
Lee drew back. "Remember when you first started at the Academy, Kara? We went for a month without going to my apartment and we survived."
She smiled. "Just barely."
"Let's take it one weekend at a time. I'll come see you tomorrow afternoon when I get out of class."
Things felt right between them again. The terrible feeling that had overwhelmed her since Sunday was gone. In fact things felt better than right.
She smiled. "I love you."
He smiled, too. "Keep that in mind when I tell you no this weekend."
"What makes you think I'm going to ask?"
"Because I know you."
"You'll break first. You'll ask first."
"How much do you want to bet on it?"
She smiled again. "How much do you?"
...
Kara went through the instrument check in the simulator in record time and without any mistakes.
"Very good, Cadet Thrace," her father said. "Today is instrument flying only. You're in fog and rain with zero visibility. Do not try to gain any perspective from looking out of your canopy. It's very easy to become spatially disoriented because once you close the canopy you won't be able to see any landmarks. Are you ready?"
"Yes, sir."
She was more than ready to do it. She was more than ready to make up for the way she had messed up the previous week. She'd lost her enviable position of being a sim ahead of her class. She doubted she'd ever get it back, but if she finished the assignments quickly enough, she hoped her dad would let her start practicing on the really hard stuff. Before she left the Academy, she wanted a shot at the sim that no cadet had ever successfully flown before.
She closed the canopy. Instead of a helmet she wore a headset in the simulator. Instructions for what she was to do came through it. Sometimes the voice was Colonel Burgher's, sometimes it was her father's.
The computerized canopy flickered and came on. Her father was right. It gave the impression of flying through dense fog. The appearance of moisture beading on the outside and sliding along the Plexiglas was so real it amazed her. Her father was right about what she could see, too, or rather not see. There were no landmarks. There was no horizon. There was no up or down.
She looked at her instruments and followed the instructions. Before the sim was over, she did a full instrument landing during which she could not see the runway until she was a few feet above it. The canopy slid back.
She pulled the headset off. "Better than last week, huh?"
Her father was standing at the computer. "You didn't lose a single point. You did great."
"Can I shoot some Cylon Raiders now?"
"I don't have time to get that sim loaded and run it before your time is up. That one is coming. I promise."
She climbed out of the cockpit. "Did anyone else get a perfect score?"
"One other cadet."
"Who?" Kara asked in surprise.
"You know I can't tell you that. We've got time to talk if you want to. Let's go sit down." He started the shut-down procedure on the computer and they walked up into the amphitheater.
"Everybody's talking about Laura running for President," Kara said after they were seated.
"She met with Adar yesterday. They talked about her campaign which she assures me is going to be really scaled down from past years since there's only one Colony left. The campaign budget is miniscule compared to other years. Mickelson withdrew from the race as soon as Laura announced. She's going to ask him to be her Vice-Presidential candidate. Adar doesn't think anybody else stands a snowball's chance in Hades."
"Wow. So my stepmom's going to be the President next year and my dad is going to be…what?"
John laughed. "First Escort. First Husband. Take your pick."
"You're joking."
"I'm wish I were. Even though there are plenty of women in politics. The Colonies have never elected a woman President before. There's no precedent for a guy First Lady. Nobody has come up yet with what I'll be called…officially that is."
"I guess that means Braedon's going to be First Baby?"
"First Son, probably and you'll be First Daughter. You'll get your own room in Marble House, the Presidential residence."
"No kidding?" Kara grinned. "Of course by next January when Laura takes office, I'll be on a battlestar."
"You'll have to come back for the inauguration."
Kara was suddenly serious. "Commander Adama will have put his plan into action before then. I guess we're assuming a lot. We might…none of us might be here in January."
"We've got to stay optimistic, baby. I don't think Bill will do anything unless he thinks there's almost no chance he'll fail. I know with Laura's announcement, our lives are going to be lived in a fishbowl. I talked to Colonel Winters this week. He assures me you'll be protected from the press here, but outside the Academy, you'll have to be careful."
"Why would they care what I do?"
"Because you're Laura Roslin's stepdaughter."
"Don't worry, Dad. I'm not going to embarrass you or Laura."
"That's not my concern. I don't want you to be hounded. Laura is going to try to work out a deal with D'Anna Biers for them to leave you alone in return for some exclusive interviews, but that doesn't mean everybody will do as she asks. They may try to get to you through Lee, too."
"Have you seen Lee this week?"
"I had lunch with him yesterday. He made it to the cafeteria while I was still there."
Kara looked sideways at her father. "Did he say anything about…us?"
"No. Should he have?"
"We're not going to go back to his apartment for a while. I'm surprised he didn't tell you. I know it would have made your day."
"Kara, that's not exactly the kind of thing he would say in front of a half dozen faculty members. How did all this come about?"
Kara told him Lee's decision and how they were both going to try harder to be open with each other.
"Lee's showing a real level of maturity."
"What about me?" Kara asked. "I said I'd go along with it."
"You, too, baby. I'm proud of both of you."
"I'm going back to see Dreilide on Saturday."
"I figured you would. You know I'm here for you if you need me."
"You're okay with it?"
"I know this is something you need to do. If you want to talk, I'm here. Otherwise I'm not going to pry. You know I love you no matter what."
Kara felt emotion well in her. "You're the best dad in the whole world."
"Just call me First Dad," her father said lightly.
...
Saturday morning Kara got out of a transport in front of Dreilide Thrace's apartment building. She wasn't as nervous as she had been the week before, but she wasn't completely calm either.
She climbed the stairs, took a couple of deep breaths and knocked on the door.
When he opened it, he was wearing a dark shirt and jeans. The ever-present cigarette was in his hand, but something looked different. She finally realized he had gotten a haircut. He'd shaved, too.
He stood back. "Come in." He made no move to hug her or touch her in any way. "I've got coffee. Do you drink coffee?"
Kara nodded. John could fix her coffee exactly the way she liked it, two spoonfuls of cream, no sugar.
She followed Thrace into a tiny kitchen. A two-burner hot plate sat on top of the stove. There was a small microwave on the counter beside it. A pot of water sat on one of the hot plate's burners.
"The stove's broken. I don't have a coffee maker."
A jar of instant coffee stood on the counter along with the powdered creamer, sugar and a mug. "Don't you want some?" Kara asked.
"I've had four cups while I was waiting for you. I'm over my morning limit."
Kara made a cup of coffee and they walked back into the main room. She sat on the couch and he again sat on the piano stool. She glanced around as she sipped her coffee. He had cleaned up the place, too, or at least straightened it up. The sheet music was stacked neatly on the bookcase. The table was clear.
"What happened to your mother?" He finally asked.
"She stayed behind with her Unit on Picon."
"Stayed behind?"
"The night after the basestar exploded, my…John…got a ship and came to take us off the planet. Mom wouldn't leave."
"So he brought you here."
"I didn't know until that night about my mom and him."
"What do you mean you didn't know about them? After I left…you mean they didn't…her and him…they didn't get together?"
"No. Mom and I moved into a little house on the base. It was just me and her after that."
Dreilide lit another cigarette, got up and walked to the window. She heard him take a deep drag. He blew out the smoke. "Damn. I never would have thought that. Never."
"Is he the reason you left?" Kara asked, her voice so soft she was surprised he heard her.
"She's the reason I finally left. You're the reason I stayed for as long as I did."
"Liar," Kara said.
He ignored her. "The first time I saw your mother was in an art class in the tenth grade. I thought she was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. I went home that night and wrote a song for her. I called it Angel, Wings of Fire."
He went back to the piano, put the cigarette in an ash tray on top, and played several dozen bars of the song. It was instantly familiar to her. "You wrote that when you were in the tenth grade?"
"The core melody, yeah. I've reworked it a couple of times since then. It's the lead song on my biggest-selling CD. I think eight or nine hundred people bought it."
Kara couldn't tell if he was being sarcastic or just sad. He got the cigarette from the ash tray and turned around on the piano stool to face her again.
"You live with him, I guess?"
"I live at the Academy mostly. He's married now. I have a brother, two months old."
"His wife…is she beautiful like your mother?"
"She's Laura Roslin, the Secretary of Education. I'm sure you've seen her on television. She's all over the news this week. She's going to run for President. Everybody thinks she'll be elected."
Dreilide didn't say anything for a moment and then he laughed. "That's just about perfect for him. It restores my faith in the rewards of sin."
Kara felt something break…or harden in her. She wasn't sure which. "Where did you go when you left?"
"Heliopolis, on the west coast of Picon. I did like thousands of fools have done before me. I followed the sun. I gave up playing the clubs for a while, got a job playing piano in a studio orchestra. We recorded sound tracks for films. It was a day job, mostly. I made contacts. I tried to get serious about composing again."
He took a drag on his cigarette and suffered a coughing spell.
"Are you okay?" Kara asked.
He poured a glass of whiskey from the bottle on top of the piano and took a swallow.
"The best cough medicine there is." After a moment and another sip he went on. "I left Heliopolis after a couple of years and moved here. I'd met some other musicians and we formed a jazz band. I went back to playing the clubs. The composing wasn't going as well as I'd thought it would. It seems I'd lost my Muse. She had deserted me," he said lightly, "about the time I deserted you and your mother."
This time Kara got up and walked to the window. She looked at the fire escape and the building across the alley. The coffee felt strong and bitter in her stomach, like it was going to gnaw its way into her heart. "Why was my mother in an art class?"
"Because when she was sixteen years old, she wanted to be an artist."
"What a crock," Kara said derisively. "What a total crock. She always wanted to be a Marine. She told me so."
"Her father was a Marine. The First Cylon War was still going on then. He was killed on Tauron that year. She changed after that. But there was still a piece of her that didn't want to let go of her dream. We were going to live like starving artists…pure…not selling out…not going commercial…her painting and me composing. The idealism of youth. It didn't last long. I persuaded her to marry me anyway as soon as we graduated. We went to City Hall. It was the last time I ever saw her in a dress. She enlisted a month after our wedding."
"I have a boyfriend," Kara said and turned around to look at him. "He's a pilot, too."
"That doesn't surprise me." He sounded slightly amused.
"It just happened that way."
His tone was sarcastic again and a little sad. "Your mother would be very proud of you, joining the military."
"She died a hero," Kara said angrily. "Don't you dare make fun of her!"
"I'm not making fun of her. And I'm sure she died a hero. She would have wanted something different for you. That's all."
"Then why did she always treat me like I was the recruit and she was the drill sergeant?"
"After a year together she treated me the same way. It was her shield. It kept her from getting too close to anyone."
"Do you regret being married to her?"
"Not for a minute. The things I learned while I was with her…and you…I could never have learned any other way."
"So that's what we were to you…a learning experience?"
"No. I'm sorry if it came across that way. That's not how I meant it. Kara, she never loved me the way she loved him. She changed after she got shot that first time and had to spend a couple of months in a rehab hospital. I knew the minute I saw them together why she had changed. I went to see her one day and they were in the rec room and she was in his face. They were inches apart and she was giving him hell about something and him on crutches with part of his leg missing and her arm and shoulder in a contraption that probably weighed as much as she did. I could feel the electricity between them all the way across the room."
"She wouldn't let him get away with being a jerk to the help," Kara said quietly.
"It must have happened a lot because everybody else was going about their business like it was nothing unusual. I backed away and left. They never even saw me."
"He wanted to kill himself because he couldn't fly a Viper anymore."
Dreilide suffered another coughing spell and took another sip of whiskey. "Life is full of little tragedies. They're all around us."
"You hate him, don't you?"
"Hate is a strong negative emotion. I try to keep those out of my life. They crowd out the positive. I need all the positive I can get right now."
Kara knew there were so many more things they needed to say to each other, but she had reached the limit of what she could take at the moment.
"I'll come back," she said. "Maybe next Saturday."
"Don't wait too long." He walked with her to the door. "I'm glad you came back."
Kara wasn't sure why she felt the need to taunt him. "Maybe if I keep coming back, your Muse will follow me and find you again."
"It wasn't your fault," he said quietly as she pulled the door shut behind her. "I never blamed you."
...
She began walking toward the waterfront. She knew her father didn't want her going to see the Oracle again, but she turned toward Fifty-Third Street anyway. It took almost no time until she was at the top of the stairs.
The bronze-skinned woman opened the door but wouldn't let her in.
"She is sick."
"Bad?" Kara asked, concerned.
"Her lungs have never been good since the bombing. I think she has pneumonia. There is no money for a doctor or medicine. I'm doing the best I can."
Kara reached into her pocket. She pulled out everything she had, a hundred cubits in twenty-cubit notes, the money she was going to use to buy Lee's birthday gift. She pushed it into the woman's hands.
"Take care of her. I'll bring some more next Saturday."
"Bless you," the woman said. "She told me help would come. The gods bless you."
Kara turned and went down the stairs. She felt better, the pain that she had felt on leaving Dreilide's apartment eased. She would find a Remote Banking Machine and get some more. She had saved enough during her last six months of working for Jack Fisk that she could easily help Yolanda Brenn again and still get Lee a nice birthday gift.
She walked to the east waterfront station and took the subway to the university station. Her next stop was another one her father had told her not to make. She walked to Leoben's bookstore and went in.
It was busier that morning than Kara had ever seen it. A dozen or more customers browsed throughout the shop. Leoben was helping a customer. Kara waited impatiently.
Her phone buzzed and she answered.
"I guess you've left Dreilide Thrace's apartment or you wouldn't have answered your phone," Lee said.
"Not long ago. Where do you want to meet?"
"In front of the Museum of Fine Art. On the corner of King's Bay and Fourth Streets."
"Thirty minutes. Okay?"
She ended the call and turned. Leoben was beside her.
"Can I help you with something?"
"How are you?" Kara asked.
"Busy this morning. You should have come yesterday. We could have talked."
"I couldn't."
"Class?"
"I can't leave the Academy except on Saturday unless I have a special pass."
"A big change from last year, right?"
"Huge."
"Is the time right?"
"What?" Kara asked.
"The last time you were here you said you'd be back when you knew something and the time was right. Is the time right?"
Kara shook her head. "Not yet. I've got to go. I just wanted to stop by and say hello." She turned.
"Wait. You had another reason for coming here today."
"How many of you are there? How many models?"
"I don't know."
"Yes, you do. It's in there somewhere. Think about it. I'll come back next week."
She left the bookstore and hurried to the subway. Lee was waiting for her when she got to the corner of King's Bay and Fourth.
"Let's go across the street and eat lunch first. There's nowhere to eat in the museum."
"I don't have any cubits," Kara said. "I need to find an RBM."
He smiled. "That's all right. I think I can manage to buy both of us lunch and get us in the museum. How did it go this morning?"
"If I say I don't know, I'm not trying to put you off. I still feel weird. I went to see the Oracle afterward."
"John's not going to like it."
"He's not going to find out. I didn't get to see her anyway. She's sick. That's why I don't have any money. I gave what I had to her friend for a doctor and medicine."
"Kara, there are government agencies that will help them. There are charities."
"I'd rather give the money to her than to a charity. At least I know what it's being used for."
Lee realized he couldn't argue with that.
After they ate, he took her hand. They walked across the street and up the wide marble steps of the museum. Lee paid for both of them before they went through the turnstile and into the first high-ceilinged room. It was lined with marble statues in varying sizes. Most of them were nude or semi-nude.
"Whoa," Kara said. "Let's find Apollo."
Lee rolled his eyes. "Kara, we didn't come here to…gawk at them."
"Why not?"
"This is an art museum…not a peep show."
"Then why did the sculptors carve them naked if they didn't want people to look?"
"Why am I starting to feel like this was a mistake?"
Kara laughed. "Wow! This one is old. It says she was carved a thousand years ago."
"That's Aphrodite, the goddess of Love. And it doesn't matter how old she is. Love is eternal."
"You sound like one of those diamond commercials."
Lee rolled his eyes. "You're full of yourself today."
"I thought you were going to say full of something else."
"That, too."
"Oh, look, Apollo." Kara stepped back and eyed the statue critically. "No one will ever accuse you of posing for that. He's a little on the…small side."
"What?"
She grinned and circled the statue. "Although the rear is just about perfect. Where's his Arrow?"
"It's at the Caprica Museum. We'll go see that when the exhibit opens in a couple of weeks. The Shield of Athena, too. Now let's keep going before one of the guards asks us to leave."
They wandered into another large gallery filled with paintings.
Lee said, "There's one down at the end I want you to see. It's called Posiden's Daughter. It's a painting of a sea nymph. It's my favorite painting in the whole museum."
"I'll bet she's naked," Kara whispered.
"She is, but that's not the reason I like it so much."
He took her hand again. When they got to the end of the gallery he had her sit on a bench in front of the painting. She studied it. The sea nymph was blond and beautiful. The artist had done a wonderful job of depicting the waves and the water and especially the sea foam. It all looked incredibly real, like she could dip her hand in and it would be wet with seawater.
"I can see why you like it," Kara finally said.
"She's you."
"Some artist painted her from a model. I can assure you it wasn't me, although she does look a little bit like my mother."
"This painting was done almost two hundred years ago."
"It's not her either, then."
"When I was in the deep space simulator and the accident happened and I almost died, I saw her…I saw you. When John described you to me, this is how I imagined you."
"The first time I went to see the Oracle, she called me Posiden's green-eyed daughter."
"You're kidding?"
"I'm nothing like this painting, Lee. She's perfect and beautiful. Real people don't look like that."
"Kara, that's not the point of art. It's here to inspire us. To make us appreciate the perfection and the beauty while at the same time knowing it's not real. You're real. And you are beautiful."
"Dreilide said my mother wanted to be an artist when she was sixteen years old. I'm having such a hard time with that thought. She was so tough and…and not the least bit artistic. We didn't have a single picture in the whole house except my school pictures. She was a warrior, not an artist. He's the artist."
"Life kills dreams sometimes, Kara."
"It didn't kill his dream. He's still trying to compose music, but he said his Muse left him after he left us. In a way I understand, but in a way, I don't. It looks like a painter could paint no matter what. A composer could compose no matter what."
"All artists need some sort of Muse, some sort of inspiration. The Caprican poet Kataris is said to have had as his Muse the wife of one of his closest friends. Kataris loved her purely and from afar. He never revealed that she had been the inspiration for his love poems until after her death. Much of his other great poetry was written afterward, but he never wrote love poems again."
"It figures. We're going to study Kataris this semester in my lit class. A couple of his poems are on our reading list."
"Is Whisper the Rainbow on the list?
"I think so."
"It's considered his greatest love poem. It's long, though."
"And sad?"
"Yeah."
"No wonder Mrs. Nagala likes it. I'm picking something by a woman writer we're studying to do my term paper on, Bathsheba Everdene. I want a better ending this time."
"You should get it with her," Lee said. "Now, I've made you look at Posiden's Daughter long enough. Let's go look at more paintings. You might like the modern stuff better."
As they walked into the next gallery, Kara suddenly knew what she was going to get Lee for his birthday. She might have to ask her father to help her, but she was going to get Lee a print of Posiden's Daughter and have it framed. She was going to hang it over his dresser so he could look at it each night when he went to bed. She smiled. Lee liked the sea nymph so she was going to give him the sea nymph.
When they left the art museum late that afternoon, they drove to Laura and John's apartment. Laura had gone to her new campaign headquarters for a few hours. John was keeping Braedon. Kara was almost sure she heard Dreilide's music before John muted the stereo. Braedon was on his lap. Kara picked him up.
"Little star-mapper," she said and swung him around.
"Be careful," her father said. "I just gave him a bottle. If you keep swinging him around like that you might end up wearing it."
"A bottle? What happened to Laura and breast-feeding?"
"We're supplementing. How are you, Lee?"
"Fine, John."
"How's War College going?"
"You should see the case book they've given us. A dozen scenarios. One a week. Each team will come up with a solution on Monday and we'll discuss the solutions on Tuesday and Wednesday. Then we'll do computer modeling of the two best solutions on Thursday and Friday to see which one is the best. Twelve cases, twelve weeks."
"Your dad will be looking at those case books. He's got the ones for the last four years. Have you seen him lately?"
"I've talked to him a couple of times this week. Kara and I are meeting him for dinner tonight at Channing's." Lee found he couldn't look at John. "Then I thought we might come back here for a while before I take Kara back to the Academy. My dad has a date tonight."
"Mrs. Nagala," Kara said.
"Who else?"
Kara thought about Frogman and about how Mrs. Nagala had probably dumped Frogman when she had started seeing Commander Adama but it sounded like they'd recently gotten back together. Could she be dating both men? Kara wanted to tell her father and Lee, but she wouldn't betray a man who had been kind and decent to her. She hoped he got his problems worked out with his wife. She kept her mouth shut and carried Braedon to the terrace door. His eyes were still dark blue, but she was more convinced than ever that she saw a hint of green like her own. Posiden had a green-eyed son as well as a daughter just like the Oracle had said.
She carried Braedon back to the couch and sat down with him.
"How did this morning go?" Her father asked.
Kara shrugged. "Did my mom ever mention anything about wanting to be an artist?"
"Not a word," John said.
"Well, that's what he said. He met her in an art class when they were sixteen. He wrote a song for her that night. Angel, Wings of Fire."
"That's on the CD," Lee said.
"He wrote that when he was sixteen years old?" John asked.
"He said she was his Muse. Lee and I saw a painting today of the Muses, all nine of them."
"Zeus's daughters," Lee said.
"Yeah, well none of them looked like a Marine to me," Kara said.
...
Lee and Kara left the apartment about an hour later and walked to Channing's. Bill was waiting for them. He was wearing a suit and tie.
"We're going to a cocktail party later tonight," was all he offered in way of explanation. "How are you, Kara?"
"I'm fine, sir."
"Keeping my son straight?"
She smiled. "That's more than even I can do."
"How are Laura and John and the baby?"
"All fine. My dad's got Braedon. Laura's at her new campaign headquarters."
"I don't think she's going to have to do much campaigning," Bill said. "Every single person I know is going to vote for her, especially now that Scott Mickelson is on the ticket with her."
"Good," Kara said. "Then maybe she won't be gone so much. My dad said Laura had hired a nanny. She'll be there Monday. Her name is Maya."
"Maya who?" Lee asked.
"I don't know. Just Maya. She used to work for the Secretary of Health and Human Services or something."
"How go things with Dr. Baltar?" Lee asked his father.
"I went to his lab Wednesday morning. He appeared to be hard at work. Beyond that I can't say. He's supposed to be preparing something written for me. I'm going to have a well-known virologist look at it. Of course Baltar doesn't know that. If it turns out he's shining me on, I'm bringing this other guy in and putting him in charge."
"And the captured Raider?"
"Good news. My engineering team is working with the computer expert. They've built a box that can duplicate the Raider's homing beacon. They're testing it now and are fairly certain they can put it into a Raptor. Here's the catch, though. We don't know if the Cylons only monitor those beacons on incoming ships or if they do some kind of visual reconnaissance. If it's visual, we're screwed. We'll never get a Raptor past them if that's the case."
"How would you find that out?" Kara asked.
Bill Adama smiled. "When the time is right, I'd like for you to ask one of your Cylon friends."
"Okay," Kara said.
"It's currently too risky so hold off for now. We have the shell of the other Raider, the first one Lee shot down over the Bay. The electronic part of its brain is dead, but I've got another team of engineers working on it to see if they can figure out a way to fly it by remote control. If they succeed, we may have our backup ship without risking a human life."
"That's a lot to do in a short time."
"I know it is, son."
"Can you control a ship remotely from the ground all the way to the basestar?" Kara asked.
"Probably not, but my engineers are working on it."
"Why not slave it to a Raptor?" Kara asked. "The Raptor pilot could control the Raider. Put Cylon homing beacons in both of them. Maybe you can get it close enough to the hub that the Cylons will welcome it home."
Bill smiled as he took a sip of his drink. "Another outside-of-the-box idea. I'm glad you're on our side. You might want to think about going to War College someday."
Kara grinned. "I think they would find out I'm too outside-of-the-box."
"Then you're the one I'll ask when that's what I want."
...
In the parking lot at the Academy that night, Lee turned off the ignition and started to get out of the car.
"Wait a minute," Kara said and put her hand on his arm.
"Kara, if we sit here we'll just make things a lot more difficult for each other."
"I had a good time today."
"I did, too."
"I liked the art museum. We'll have to go back."
"Yes, we will."
"One kiss?"
"Hold out your hands."
She did and Lee laced his fingers through hers. He leaned forward. "Make me keep my hands right here."
She leaned forward, her mouth inches from his. "So you admit this is not going to be easy for you."
"It's killing me." His lips touched hers.
Their kiss was gentle and deep and made him ache with the love he felt for her. Neither one of them seemed to want to break the spell the kiss had created.
"That was like art," Kara finally said softly. "Perfect."
"I think it's called inspired."
"Does that mean I'm your Muse?"
"My Muse and my sea nymph rolled into one."
"One more perfect kiss?"
He leaned forward again. "The things we do for the sake of art."
