Endless thanks to Sethnakht for continuing to be such an amazing beta.
Note: Some of the dialogue in this chapter was borrowed from The Empire Strikes Back. Some of it is from Star Wars Rebels, Season 2 Episode 18 "Shroud of Darkness."
Vague Solo spoilers, maybe?
The amazing new cover image was made by tumblr user Nerdman3000!
There were all manner of establishments Leia had figured they would choose to dine at, especially after she had learned they were eating on Padmé's dime. A greasy retro diner in the middle of Coco town had not been where she had expected to wind up.
Luke sat pressed up against her side in a sticky vinyl booth in the back corner of the place. Anakin was seated across from them both, nursing a cup of jawa juice.
He had seemed to know the proprietor of this place, a sloppy looking Besalisk whose ill fitting clothes were stained and full of holes. Given that he was married to the Chancellor of the Republic, it was odd that Anakin seemed most comfortable far away from the comforts of the upper classes.
Leia couldn't really blame him. Coruscanti culture was so artificial and over the top, the people beyond droll and insufferable. At least the people here seemed more real. And unlike the establishment he had taken her to for lunch the other day, this place was on an actual surface level, with nothing above it but sky and heavily filtered air.
Luke was telling them a story. Something about the gang he and Obi-Wan apparently spent most of their time investigating. Crimson Dawn. Hadn't they disbanded in Leia's universe, around three or five years ago? She thought the Rebellion might have gotten an influx of former members into their ranks, seeking protections when their affiliations no longer had meaning, but she couldn't be sure. There were a lot of former criminals and lowlifes in the Rebel ranks. A lot of current ones too, she mused, thinking about Han.
"What are you smiling about?" Anakin asked, interrupting Leia's thoughts.
"Huh?"
"You were smiling down at your menu," Anakin explained. "Dex's food is good, but not that good. Come on, what put that beautiful smile on your face?"
Leia felt her cheeks grow warm, and she glanced out the window at the foot traffic going by, not able to look at either of her companions. "Nothing."
Luke was laughing. "Ooooo, what's their name?"
"What?"
She turned to glare at him, and he was grinning back at her. Obnoxious. That was the best word to describe his particular smile.
"Oh c'mon, I know you're not my sister, but if you think I've never seen that look on her face before-"
"I have no idea what you are talking about!"
"Yeah, sure, of course you don't," he was still grinning at her in that annoying manner, and Leia had to resist the impulse to lash out at him for his over the top boorish behavior. He seemed to pick up on her discomfort, raising an eyebrow at her expectantly.
She resolved not to stoop to his level.
Anakin didn't help the situation at all, excusing himself to go to the fresher after a long period of awkward silence, leaving her pressed tight in the booth with a still grinning familiar stranger.
If Luke would not respect her emotional boundaries she really had to insist he at least observe her physical ones. "Could you please move over? Your elbow is jamming into my side."
Deliberately, slowly, staring at her the whole time, he lifted the offending elbow and… and rested it right on top of her shoulder.
"Maybe you misunderstood me? I meant can you please remove it from my person," Leia was quite proud of herself for managing to keep her voice level.
"But why wouldn't I rest it here, when your shoulder is the perfect height?"
"Please, I really am not in the mood for this."
"I was commenting on how short you are, just in case you didn't pick up on that."
Why was he like this? Her Luke never pushed her buttons like this. No, her friend was always patient and understanding and got that she had boundaries and didn't want him to cross them.
Stars, she really missed Luke.
"You are aware that you're not that much taller than I am, right?"
"Ah, but I am taller. And older."
"How lovely for you. Now can you please move your elbow somewhere else?"
"Make me."
What kind of stupid childish nonsense was this? She grabbed his arm and shoved it away from her, absolutely fed up with his behavior.
For some reason that amused him. Luke started laughing, and to her surprise he moved over on his own accord, giving her the space she needed.
"Wow, you really weren't kidding about being an only child, huh? I mean I was barely even touching you and were acting like I'd insulted your pet worrt or something!"
Leia's nose scrunched up with distaste. "If I for some reason had a worrt, you'd be doing me a favor by pointing out how awful it was. Who the kriff would want to have a pet worrt?"
"Yes! Exactly!"
"What are the two of you talking about?" Anakin asked as he returned to his seat.
"The memory of worrts long past," Luke responded.
Anakin's face fell. "I still don't get what happened to Slimey. Worrts are supposed to live so much longer than he did. The one that hung around the slave district when I was kid had been there my whole childhood, and everyone said he'd been there for years before then too."
Leia snorted at the absurdity of it all. "Don't tell me you honestly had a pet worrt named Slimey!" Then her brain caught onto the rest of Anakin's statement, and her eyes widened with surprise. "Wait. Slave district?"
Anakin refused to meet her eye, craning his neck to look around the diner instead. "Where'd FLO go?" he asked. "Sure is taking her a while to come and take our order, huh?"
"Anakin, how and why were you spending your childhood near a slave district?"
"Oh, that's 'cause dad was one," Luke said casually, the information anything but interesting to him. "Back on Tatooine."
Anakin still wasn't looking at her.
"You… oh! Oh no wonder you didn't like the fact that Luke grew up there." Her eyes narrowed, remembering how he had reacted to her mention of the Lars family earlier that day. The suggestion that they were part of his family had set him off in a manner she hadn't been able to understand then, but with this new context... "Anakin, please don't tell me that Luke's aunt and uncle are slave owners." She didn't include Luke, it hurt too much to consider that the kind and gentle boy might have unquestionably accepted those kinds of abhorrent behaviors. Or worse yet… "Tell me you don't suspect that they were capable of… using Luke for slave labor."
The table was shaking, tiny jolts up and down. It was easy to identify why. One of Anakin's legs was shaking.
Anakin said nothing, just kept glancing through the diner, adjusting how he was sitting in his seat over and over again. Leia was contemplating shouting at him to just sit still already, when he spoke.
"The Lars family owned my mom," he said. "Set her free so she could marry one of them, but they paid money for her and had a deed of ownership and everything."
Leia felt sick.
"I'm so sorry, I had no idea. Luke never said anything to indicate that-"
Anakin interrupted her. "Why would he? It's not exactly something people on Tatooine like to dwell on, or talk about at all. Just another fact of life under the Hutts. Besides it's all ancient history now, right?"
His behavior suggested he wasn't as over it as he would want her to believe, but she didn't press the matter.
She was only one generation removed from slavery. Kriff, but that was a lot to process.
How had Anakin gotten free? He must have, somehow. Perhaps he'd managed to escape Hutt space and come to the Republic as a refugee? Leia wanted to ask, she had so many questions, but he obviously wanted to drop the topic, and she wasn't going to force him so far past his comfort level.
Leia didn't know if she would ever really have the chance to learn about him once she got home. It was possible that Luke would know more, but she was terrified of what she would find out about Luke in the process. Still, if Anakin didn't want to talk about it, she would respect that.
The WA-7 droid finally rolled over to take their orders, effectively slamming the door on any further discussion of Anakin's past.
After the droid left their table, they stayed on light hearted topics of little consequence, Luke and Anakin chatting away as Leia gazed out the window.
For a moment she thought she saw… out the window… but no. No, that wasn't possible.
She turned back to the two chatting men, they had returned to talking about Crimson Dawn. Mostly the conversation concerned the leader of the gang, who had some sort of grudge against Obi-Wan.
How a criminal came to have a personal grudge against a Jedi was beyond Leia. It would make more sense for him to be concerned with the Order as a whole, why focus on just one individual?
She appreciated not being expected to really participate in the conversation. Free to let her mind wander, Leia focused on watching the pedestrians strolling on the sidewalk outside.
It was startlingly ordinary.
Sure, there were more aliens in the crowd, some from species who would never have been on a surface level in her world (of course even on the surface level Coruscant had always had more aliens mixed into the crowd than anywhere on Alderaan)...
But the way people acted was the same. The flow of traffic, the bustle of daily city life.
Even the fashion was depressingly similar.
Loose flowing dresses, capes, vests and billowing sleeves. Yes the starched high collars and the jumpsuits were missing, but the fashion trends were close, too close to what she knew.
The biggest difference from her universe was there were no Stormtroopers milling through the crowd, but she did see… people in uniforms, cloth uniforms, acting as the stormtroopers always had.
The Empire may not have risen, but this world was not fully different from the one she knew.
She imagined an overlay of the streets of Coruscant she had known with what she saw out the window - at least she hoped she was imagining it - and things really were practically the same.
How disturbing.
The WA-7 returned with their food in hand, loudly placing the plates down on the table before rolling off.
Leia gazed down at her hastily ordered meal (she had simply asked for the same thing Anakin had ordered, as he seemed to have opinions about this food and Luke's fried Naboo sardines hadn't sounded very appealing) and realized she'd never actually had greasy diner food before.
She had gone directly from being one of the richest individuals in the galaxy who ate only the highest quality gourmet meals, to consisting on the polystarch and dehydrated ration bars of an underfunded rebellion. There had been no sampling of the vast array of foods that bridged that gap, and the transition had been as harsh as the explosion that had ended her world.
Leia knew the bantha-burger sitting in front of her was as average as a meal could get, the sort of thing countless beings across the galaxy ate each day… yet she simply had never had anything like it before.
She poked at the seed covered bun with one finger, hoping to see if it was structurally sound enough to be eaten as a sandwich. Anakin was consuming his own burger as if it was, but grease dribbled out of it, dripping onto the plate as chunks of meat fell loose, and she was not certain it really could hold up to such a manner of consumption. Beside her Luke let out a bellowing laugh.
"No! Please don't tell me you've never had a burger before," Luke shoved one of his fried fish strips in his mouth before continuing. "Kriff, what sort of life have you had?"
"Hey!" Anakin said with a mouth full of food, "language!" He swallowed his food. "Your mom would want me to mention the talking with your mouth full part as well, but that'd make me a hypocrite."
Leia had spent too much time in military barracks to find their table manners surprising or offensive. She sighed, leaning back, still regarding the burger with faint suspicion. "I was merely trying to ascertain if I wanted to eat this with my hands or with the silverware," she explained, not wanting to get into the specifics of her diet. She gestured at Anakin, "it seemed apparent that this meal may be too sloppy to-" she cast about for a good excuse, one that would get Luke off her back. "-to pick up in that manner while I am wearing someone else's clothes. I would not want to insult your sister by staining her robes." There. That should make him feel guilty for making her feel awkward about never having one of these things before.
"Oh." Luke shook his head. "Lei won't mind. Stars, she's a sloppy eater herself, she really wouldn't care if you got grease on her robes or something."
Leia had been planning on attempting to eat the thing as a sandwich, but now that Luke had thrown so much attention on the issue she grabbed the flatware and began to cut into the bread and the meat patty it contained. "I merely wish to be polite," she said, before popping what she had cut off from the sandwich into her mouth.
It was good. The excessive hot grease and oil made the cheaper meat seem juicier than it normally would have been. The cheese and spices mixed into the patty worked well together, and the bread soaked up a lot of flavor. It wasn't the best thing Leia had ever had, but it was far from the worst. Loads better than the lunch she had with Anakin her first day in this place.
"Oh come on!" Luke exclaimed, still uncomfortably invested in Leia's actions, elbows on the table, leaning over her plate, "eating it like that is so wrong."
Not letting her frustration alter how much pressure she put on the knife, she made no noise as she cut into her meal, just as her Aunts had always taught her. Impeccable royal manners on display in a greasy spoon diner. She didn't even glance in Luke's direction as she swallowed her first piece and consumed another.
"Are you kidding me? This is Dex's, not a state function. You don't have to eat like that!"
She couldn't properly describe it, the sick heady satisfaction she was getting from both ignoring Luke's ire and increasing it all at once. It was better than the burger - better than the food she'd had for dinner with Padmé the night before.
She finished the burger, the fried root strips all that was left on her plate. Rather than give Luke the satisfaction of watching her eat them with her fingers, she offered them to Anakin. His expression suggested he knew what she was doing, but he accepted them anyway, shoving them into his mouth by the handful.
Luke leaned back, finally, giving Leia that much more room to breathe, squeezed on that tiny booth between him and the window.
She returned to gazing out onto the street, trying her best to catch differences between this world and her own, real tangible proof that the culture of the Republic of old was nothing like the Empire she knew.
She caught sight of a few vague differences, the odd person in a dress that would have been at home in Amilyn's wardrobe, but that was about it.
Still, if she could locate a store selling those dresses, it would make for a great gift for her friend. Was one supposed to get gifts for their friends when stranded in an alternate dimension? There wasn't any set etiquette for this situation to fall back on.
"What are you looking at?" Anakin asked.
Leia turned away from the window, looking at him. He was still eating the remains of her meal.
"The fashion. It's remarkably similar to my own dimension."
Anakin's face scrunched up. "And that is interesting because?"
"Because dad, fashion - like all art - is a reflection of the cultural forces at play," Luke answered for her. He frowned, before reaching some sort of epiphany, the lines of his face smoothing out in a flash. "Hey, I have an idea. Why don't we go to the history museum of the Republic and really examine just where things went different? Even the difference in how events are framed would be fascinating." The suggestion was just a touch too eager, the words rehearsed. Leia was not sure she would have even caught it without a lifetime in politics under her belt. No, even then she would not have, she thought. It was the three years she had spent as a spy that made her think the words were not Luke's own.
Still the idea wasn't terrible, and she could not think of any reason to argue against it.
Luke was distant during dinner. It wasn't that he didn't speak much, it was how he didn't seem to be listening to anything anyone else said. Kriff, he wasn't even eating. He would alternate between swirling the stew around his bowl and gazing into the swamp. He wasn't even looking in the direction of the other hut.
Leia couldn't figure him out at all. In part that wasn't too surprising, since she'd known the guy for less than a week. Yet every one of her instincts reaffirmed that he was still her brother, still someone she should know better than she knew herself.
It was disorienting, looking into such a familiar face, feeling such a familiar presence, and yet knowing he was almost a total stranger.
Even Master Yoda, for all that he was… well… Master Yoda, was someone entirely new. Someone who she had only just met today.
The logistics of dimensional travel sure were confusing.
She knew nothing about this Master Yoda. How could she just assume he was the same as her own? She was nothing like this dimension's Leia, and Luke certainly wasn't like her brother. Why would Master Yoda be any different?
She wanted to get to know him, this version of the wise grandmaster living in a swamp covered planet all alone. She tried to remember anything he might have mentioned about himself while they were speaking earlier, and the only things she could really think of were an attempt to avoid speaking about the end of the Jedi Order and a vague reference to some sort of journey he had undertaken at some point in the past.
That wasn't the worst starting point.
"You said something about a quest you went on, Master Yoda, one that may be related to my situation?"
"Say something did I? No, no. Not pertinent."
"I'd still love to hear about it. You never know Master, it could be connected somehow."
"Hmmm. No, no. No connection. Talk more of your timeline, your past, we should."
"Please, Master Yoda? I'm tired of just sharing stories from my timeline, especially because they've all been things you already know. We can resume talking about my father tomorrow, but for now, I really want to know more about you."
Yoda moved closer to the pot, filling his bowl with more stew. He waved off Luke's attempt to do it for him - with their longer arms neither Luke nor Leia had to move from their seats to reach the food. He sat back, looking between the two of them as if expecting the topic to shift if he just waited long enough. Finally he sighed. "Hmmm. Fine, recount it I will. During the Clone War, it was. Near the end. Heard the voice of Qui-Gon Jinn, I did."
"What? But… but he died a decade before the war even began!"
"Hmmm. Yes. Confused by this I was. Left to discover how this was possible."
"And did you?"
"Like Obi-Wan he was. One with the Force, yet still here. Still an individual. Learned how to become the same, I did."
As far as Leia knew, no one in her dimension could do anything like this. Yet Qui-Gon, he'd died ages before she was born. Way back during the trade federation invasion! Why didn't Master Yoda think this was the divergence?
No. No, that was the wrong question. Before she asked that she had to understand what exactly they were talking about anyway.
"How does one learn how to do that?"
Ok, she had to admit, she wasn't just asking because of pure intellectual curiosity.
If she returned home with the secret to this mysterious technique… they'd have to make her a knight then! No better yet, if Leia figured this out they'd skip knighthood outright and make her a Master. Youngest Master ever, even younger than her father. She'd never dreamed of surpassing her father in any way before, had always accepted she'd live her life in his shadow, but this… this could put her into his limelight.
"Hmmmm." Master Yoda was nodding at her question. "Not easy. Know yourself, you must. Understand the Darkness within you, the weakness and the strength."
Luke glanced over, confused. At least he seemed to be paying attention, finally. "So what, you just… do some self examination and suddenly you're immortal?"
"No! No. Immortality it is not. All life ends. No way around that truth. Denying the course of all life… that way lies the Dark Side."
Luke looked upset. Leia didn't blame him too much, it was often hard to understand that the Force, for all one could do with it, was just a facet of life itself. Using it to alter the very foundation of the natural world… it simply could not be done.
Shifting in his seat, Luke learned forward. "The Dark Side, is it stronger?"
Leia didn't quite get where the question was coming from.
Yoda shook his head. "No... no... no. Quicker, easier, more seductive. Anger... fear… aggression, the Dark Side of the Force are they. Easily they flow, quick to join you in a fight."
"I'm supposed to trust in the Force, but it can lead me astray if I'm not careful? So when the Force shows me things or guides me in a certain direction, just how am I to know if that is coming from the good side or the bad?"
Frowning, Leia examined Luke's face and posture. He was fully absorbed in his conversation with Yoda, that much was clear, but she couldn't figure out where this was coming from.
"You will know. When you are calm, at peace. Passive. A Jedi uses the Force for knowledge and defense, never for attack."
"Never for attack?" His face drew tight with confusion, "Why can't I-"
"No, no, accept this you must."
"What? But-"
"No!" Master Yoda slammed his stick against the ground. "Accept it you must," he repeated.
"But I don't understand-" Luke complained.
"Hmmm. Clear that is."
Luke shifted in his seat. He had been leaning forward from the start, attentive and hanging onto Yoda's every last word. Now he was on the edge of his seat, one leg shaking, the way dad's did sometimes. His expression reminded her of their father too, although she couldn't say why or how. "Can you at least tell me how I'm supposed to fight in a war while also not attacking?"
"Once, fought in a war myself, I did. Mistake this was."
"A mistake?"
"Yes. A long time, fought I did. Consumed by fear I was, though see it I did not."
"You were afraid?" Leia asked, feeling her eyes go wide with shock.
"Yes, afraid. Hmm, surprised are you? A challenge lifelong it is, not to bend fear into anger."
Leia blushed. She knew that the Dark Side was something all Jedi had to always stand against, that there would never come a time in anyone's life when they would be free of its temptation. Yet somehow she had always imagined Master Yoda to be above that sort of thing.
Sure he meditated like the rest of them, but the fact he was still trying to clear his mind of conflict, to examine and understand his intentions and actions and achieve emotional balance… kriff, to have spent nine hundred years doing all of that, and to still struggle?
It really put things into perspective for her. All those times as a child she had complained to him about how boring she found the mental exercises of her training, as opposed to the more physical stuff. The way she often wanted to be done with self examination forever. To never have to worry over what was going on internally again, and just let things be. How silly she must sound, all of twenty years of age, thinking she was above something he'd spent centuries working on.
Even worse, if the Leia of this universe truly was who she would have become under different circumstances, and she was as competent as everyone made her out to be? Then Leia certainly had it in her to properly dedicate herself to her one and only responsibility.
"It can't be wrong to stand up against the Empire!" Luke suddenly yelled. "It can't be wrong to protect people! To protect-" Luke cut himself off, flushing and forcing his posture to relax. The rest of the sentence hung unspoken, leaving Leia to wonder who Luke was worried about protecting. "I can't just stand by and do nothing!"
"Ah, do nothing I did not say. Use the Force to defend, this was my council."
Luke's frown grew even deeper. "So I'm just supposed to let Vader attack me? Attack my friends?" He shook his head, body tensing again. "What you're saying makes no sense!"
"No sense do I make? Quick to judgement you are!"
"Will you quit speaking in riddles already and just answer my questions?"
"Hmmmm. Already told you much, I have. Yes. Tomorrow. After more reflection, then we will return to this conversation."
"No! Don't… don't shut things down, not when-"
"When what Luke?" Leia asked, ready to know what had Luke so worked up. "What's wrong? What is so urgent that this conversation can't wait until tomorrow?"
Luke did not answer her, did not even look at her. He was gazing out at the bog again, attention seemingly captured by the way winged creatures flew through the heavy fog and avoided ever hitting the trees.
Leia wanted to press him for an answer, but Master Yoda held up a hand and shook his head, indicating she should hold back.
"Rest for now, we should. Early start tomorrow. Much to learn. Seem different in the morning, everything might."
Hadn't Master Yoda told her he wanted to talk more about Darth Vader?
"Master, do you still want to talk with me tonight?"
"Hmmmmm. Decide you can. Speak together tonight, or first thing tomorrow."
The sun was only just setting, the glimpses of sky Leia could see through the trees a hazy orange shot through with splashes of pink, and yellow. Even putting aside how early it seemed, it was always hard after arriving on a new planet to adjust to the local sleep cycle. However neither Leia nor Luke had gotten a lot of sleep the earlier night, and they'd had a very long day being pushing to their limits both physically and mentally.
Sleep really didn't sound like a terrible idea right then.
"I think I'd rather talk tomorrow, Master," Leia decided.
She began to really think about how tired she was, how much she wanted to sleep, the reality of their sleeping arrangements intruding on her fantasy.
Both she and Luke were going to sleep on the floor of Yoda's home. Rather than lying directly on the stone floor, there were furs scattered on the ground. These were also to be used as their blankets as they slept.
Leia recalled the snakes she had seen slithering about Yoda's living space earlier, and had to suppress a shudder.
Before sleeping, Leia wanted to check to be sure the space was clear of those awful creatures. She stood, and began to make her way towards the hut, yet was stopped by the sound of Yoda calling out to her.
"Before we sleep, meditate we all should. Put our minds in order. Long day we had, full of confusion. Let go of lingering emotion, we must. Hmmm?"
Right, of course, meditation, how could she forget.
Kriff, hadn't she just promised herself to take her training and role as a Jedi more seriously?
She headed back towards where Yoda and Luke were sitting, placing herself between Luke and the swamp he was still staring out at.
He scowled at her, then examined his lap and his feet, seemingly determined to continue sulking like a being half his age. How appropriate, she thought. He was acting like one of the younglings the Grand Master usually taught.
Irritated, she decided to share that thought with him, and was satisfied with his immediate reaction.
Luke's face was bright red, his frown was deep, and is attention was fully focused on her. It took far more than a few words to get her own brother to react so strongly. Usually things were the other way around: Luke making her react while she failed to penetrate his unflappable calm. While this was not her Luke, Leia couldn't help but feel like this was retribution for all the times her brother had gotten her into trouble over the years.
"Hey!" Luke exclaimed, standing from where he had been sitting "I am not -"
Whatever else he wanted to say, Leia did not hear it. Of course she didn't, what with Master Yoda sitting right there.
"Calm ourselves we should," the wizened Master said, voice firm. "Sit down, process our emotions, understand and let them go before they get the best of us, no?"
The color drained from Luke's face, and he gaped down at Yoda, still seated by their pot of stew.
"Of course, I…" Luke sat down, "I'm sorry, Master."
Leia suppressed a smile, schooling her face into a mask of perfect innocence as she rejoined them, folding her legs into a comfortable position for meditating.
"I'm sure meditation will help Luke with his mood swings, Master," she said, somehow managing to to keep her voice steady. "He's just tired and new at this all. Please don't be mad at him."
There were few things as satisfying as knowing that her words just provoked Luke further.
Sure, tomorrow she'd start taking her training that much more seriously, but for now? Now she was going to have as much fun as she could with this version of Luke who hadn't been raised with a sibling.
