Chapter 118: Striking A Balance
Author's Note: There's more coming, but first, I have to go outside and deal with the people who are disturbing my peace.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Rabb Residence
San Diego, California
22:47 HRS
Harm walks into his bedroom and stretches his tall frame out across the center of his bed lengthwise letting his feet hang over the side. Catching himself before it's too late, he starts to rest his head against his wife's abdomen and thinks better of it. Instead, he turns slightly, resting at an odd angle and lays a gentle hand against the T shirt she wears, mindful of gauze bandages over healing flesh.
"Tough couple of days." He says as her hand finds his and their fingers intertwine.
He feels her shrug. "We've seen worse. A lot worse."
He chuckles wryly. "That's certainly true. Question…"
The noise Mac makes in response is one that indicates a kind of humorless amusement. "Maybe I've got an answer… But I make no promises."
"Exactly what are we supposed to tell Laura about this latest development… Concerning her adoption."
Mac sighs heavily with quiet disgust. "I would suggest we tell her as little as humanly possible while being very careful not to lie to her at the same time. She may not understand all the intricacies of this now, but we'll have to tell her something soon. She's much too smart not to ask questions, and we both know it. She wants to be adopted, and right now I'm not sure she's old enough to really grasp the important of her mother's most recent decision. She will remember it though and someday she will be old enough to understand what she remembers. When she reaches that day, I don't want her memory of how you and I handle this to cause a potentially damaging emotional problem. My mother abandoned me without so much as a goodbye. If Laura ever learns that Casey was willing to sever her own parental rights in exchange for something so base and frivolous… God! Harm I can only imagine the damage that might do to her self-image; her sense of self-worth. At the same time, we cannot lie to her about it. If we do, and she finds out the truth later in life, it will do no less damage. Instead of needing to know how her own mother could choose to do that to her, she'll question how the two people she trusts most could deceive her. Either situation could be disastrous for her." Mac sighs again in disgust. "Harm, I'm so ready for this to be over with. Pamela Jensen is a good woman and she's done the best she can for Laura, but I'm so ready to get the Department of Child and Family Services out of our lives. Out of Laura's life. Not to mention the fact that I don't trust Casey in the least. She acquiesced much too easily. It's got me itchy, and I don't like it one little bit. I feel I am waiting for something bad to happen. I was finally starting to get use to not waiting for something bad to happen."
"She can't do anything. She's in jail… Remember?"
"She's not going to be in jail forever Harm… Not short of having her committed. I don't think even you could sell that to a jury. She's not insane… She just doesn't care. Last time I checked, no matter how disgusting it may be, you can't lock people up for unrepentant apathy."
"No, but it won't do you any good to obsess over it either Sarah."
"I know, I'm just not sure what else to do with myself. I feel like I'm watching the storm clouds gather."
"Let's just wait for Laura's court date to come up. In the meantime, ignore the storm clouds, focus on your recovery. Let's do what we can to keep Skates and Harriett in fighting form, keep our upcoming plans with our godchildren, and take it one day at a time. If your sister decides to make an ass of herself, more so than she already has, we'll deal with it when we have to. There is no sense worrying about, and making yourself crazy over, what hasn't happened yet. Do that, and when something does happen, you won't be in any shape to deal with it."
She smiles. "Know what?"
"Hmm…"
"Sometimes… It's really annoying how smart you are."
"And it's impressive how much you worry… But if you don't learn how to take a break from it, you're going to turn all our kids in to safe little neurotics who fret and worry at the drop of a hat."
She covers her face with her own hands and laughs derisively. "Oh God, I am, aren't I?"
He nods. "We may not be in great place right now, but we aren't in a horrible place either. Just try enjoying it for what it is. I'm okay. You're okay. And most importantly of all, all of our kids are okay."
