Sorry for the delay. New Years is fun for some and painful for others. Me? I work nights now. My feet HATE me.


An hour later

"There." Portia said with a smile as she finished the problems that Lipa had given her. She waved her omni-tool. "All done. Check me?" She continued her pace on the treadmill. Lipa kept up easily on the neighboring treadmill. The young Prothean wore the same workout gear that Portia did, and no weapons.

Lipa's idea of learning was several fold. Physical training meshed with scholastic exercises with question and answer sessions mixed in. Portia had taken to the odd training regime like a fish to water. Her endurance wasn't so great -until all this her chief exercise had been typing on a keyboard- but she was improving. Oh, her parents hadn't allowed her to get fat. Diet and strictly controlled short exercise had kept her youthful body fit, but not strong. Lipa was determined to change that. Slowly and methodically, she was working to help Portia gain endurance. So they were fifteen minutes into their thirty minute run.

"Let's see..." The young Prothean said with a smile as the odd pair matched paces on the treadmills. She was very careful to keep two eyes on the young human., Portia had no sense about some things. She had rarely been hurt in her life, growing up on a space station surrounded by guards had not taught her much caution. She had never been let out without supervision. She made a humming noise. "Question six?" She asked slowly.

"I am not sure that has an answer." Portia replied, somewhat concerned as they continued to run slowly and steadily. "It has to, doesn't it?" She asked, worried. "But I couldn't get it to solve."

"It does." Lipa admitted. "But it can be a bit convoluted. We will worry about the square of pi later." She ignored Portia's sigh of relief. "Did you think on the history question I posed for you?"

"Eh... Yes..." Portia said with a grimace. "I am not sure what to think to tell the truth. You asked me about the President Lincoln conspiracy theory from the North American War of 1861-1865. That Secretary of War Stanton had him killed to clear the way for Stanton to become president. I... don't know. Evidence shows that there was a conspiracy but..." She shook her head. "By their very nature, conspiracies are supposed to be secret. The idea of keeping records of them kind of defeats the purpose, doesn't it?"

"Depends on what the conspirators want to do." Lipa said easily. "If they feel the need to explain their actions, then yes, they will leave some kind of record. This seems to hold true across multiple species. The only race that it doesn't seem to hold true for are the Salarians." Portia opened her mouth and then shut it. "Yes, Portia?" The young soldier asked.

"I was going to say something rude." Portia said, shamefaced. "I don't know any Salarians."

"Neither do I." Lipa admitted. She smiled. "Well... I don't see any Salarians here, but let's err on the side of caution, shall we?"

"Good idea." Portia said, stumbling a little but recovering. All four of Lipa's eyes narrowed and she nodded minutely. Portia gave a squeak as her treadmill slowed. "Hey!" She complained.

"You are not going to get strong in a day, Portia." Lipa said with a nod. "It takes time, and the last thing I -or anyone- want to do is hurt you." Portia looked at the Prothean and then, inexplicably, burst into tears as she stumbled off the treadmill. Portia was off her own and at the crying human's side in a heartbeat. "Portia? What?" She was careful when she gripped Portia steadying the girl. Now was not the time for either of them to get lost in Lipa's enhanced memories. "Portia?"

"You...are so nice..." Portia sobbed. "I don't know what to do... or why..." She shook her head. "I... Lipa, I think... The Rachni said I might have flashbacks. I think that is what this is. I keep seeing a man in white. Then my parents, then the man in white again. Help!" She begged as she crumpled. Lipa caught her easily and held her close.

"Dang it." Lipa said softly. "Okay, hang on. I'll get you to C-Flat Viridian."

"You all are so nice..." Portia mused. She snuggled closer to Lipa as the Prothean lifted her easily and started from the room. "I want this crap gone."

"Tell me you are not better already." Lipa said gently a she walked to the door. The two Prothean sentries posted outside did not look surprised. Then again, they would have been monitoring. Unlike Lipa, both of them were armed and armored. The Protheans took their duty to Anya and her extended family very seriously. "Has the queen been notified?" Lipa asked the guards who nodded. "Where?"

"Med bay one." The senior guard replied. The guards fell in behind her as she carried Portia's slowly relaxing form.

"Can you walk, Portia?" Lipa asked after a moment. "Less embarrassing than being carried in."

"I... think so..." Portia said slowly. Lipa stopped and set the human on her feet. "I still see... It..but.. I can focus..." She took several deep breaths and nodded, her face calming. "The meditation helps. Thank you."

"We needed it to control our anger." Lipa said sadly. "We were so... so angry. If Scholar and Javik hadn't managed to calm us... I shudder to think what we might have done. I am glad it helps."

"Let's go." Portia said after a moment. "I know C-Flat Viridian cannot fit through most of the station doors and if I know Mika, she has already warned everyone I am sick again." She said sourly.

"You are not sick." Lipa said sternly as she took Portia's and in her own. "You are hurt. You were abused, but that is over. No one will abuse you again." Both sentries nodded as well. There was no give in the Prothean's voice, and no mercy either. Portia smiled a little at the Prothean's vehemence.

"You are scary." Portia admitted. "But right now, I don't mind. I could use some scary to scare away my bad stuff."

"Anytime." Lipa said gently as she looked the human up and down. "Come on." She held out her hand and Portia took it. "What 'It', Portia?" Lipa asked as she odd group started off again.

"Hmmm?" Portia asked, distracted.

"You said you saw 'It', Portia." Lipa said gently. "That is new. What did you see?"

"I am not sure." Portia said slowly. "It's a holo, an odd one. Not any that I know offhand. A... A command sequence, I think..." She paused as all three Protheans froze in place. "That's bad, isn't it?" She asked in a very small voice.

"Yes, Portia, that is bad." Lipa kept the girl turned towards her so Portia would not see the two pistols that the sentries had out. Their orders were clear. If Portia threatened Anya... Lipa shook her head minutely and the guns were hidden. "Come on, let get you some help. It's not far." Portia grimaced.

"Don't let me hurt you or my sisters." Portia demanded. "Promise me!"

"Portia, I cannot promise you that." Lipa protested. "Come on, C-Flat Viridian can... Portia! No!" She shouted as the girl darted to the side. The movement was so unexpected that all three Protheans were caught flat footed. The guard there had less than a second to realize that Portia was moving before she darted away, the pistol that he had been holding in the girl's grasp. "Portia!" everything stopped as Portia aimed the purloined weapon at her own skull! "Portia... No..." Lipa begged, not daring to move.

"I won't hurt you." Portia said, tears streaming. "They want me to. I can...feel them... inside my head. Stealing my thoughts... I..." She shook her head savagely, but when Lipa took a slow step forward, Portia backed up until she came flush to the wall of the corridor. "Stay back." The girl begged. Then everything seemed to stop as a soft sound came from nearby.

'Dance then, wherever you may be, I am the lord of the dance, said he...'

Kai stepped into the corridor from a door ahead. She still wore the same blue dress she had before. Her hands were empty and her face was serene, despite the tears that fell as she sang. She stepped forward, as if oblivious to the scene. But her eyes were open and her gaze landed on Portia who stiffened. She smiled sadly and finished the verse before speaking again.

"It's not you, Portia." Kai said gently. "You do not want to die. It's the programming. C-Flat Viridian said that you might have episodes but she had no idea they would be this bad. She wants to help. I want to help. Please let us?" The eldest sibling begged as she raised a slow hand and took another slow step.

"I just want it to end!" Portia snapped. "Let me die!"

"No." Kai's voice turned implacable. "Sister... You are not thinking clearly. If you were and chose an end, I would not get in your way." Lipa started, but Kai did not pause in her slow advance. "But you are not. Portia... They hurt you. They wanted you in pain, in fear, to obey. We don't." Kai paused and shook her head. "Portia, we love you. Please don't leave us."

"Kai..." Portia seemed frozen in place. "I am a threat."

"I know, sis." Kai said sadly. "And you know what? I don't care!" She was well within reach of Portia now, but made no move. "Portia, please put the gun down. Don't let your birth parents win." She remained where she was as Portia's shaking hand came down from her head. "Please put the gun down, sis." Kai begged.

"You won't take it?" Portia asked, unsure.

"If I do, your guards will shoot me." Kai said with a nod. "Then the queen will have to spend time she should spend on you putting me back together." Portia's eyes went to the guards who indeed, had weapons trained on Kai. One pistol and one rifle. "Just put it down, sis."

"I... I can't..." Portia exclaimed, her face twisting with effort. "Kai!" She exclaimed, horrified. "I can't!"

"Dang it!" Kai snapped, worried. "Portia, will you let Lipa disarm you?"

"I am trying to drop it!" Portia snapped. "My fingers won't open. Kai... No!" She screamed as the gun leveled at her sister. "Someone stop me!" She cried. "Lipa, help!" She screamed. A dark blur entered the scene and then everything seemed to stop as a gunshot sounded. The gun clattered to the floor as Portia stared at the unarmored Prothean who stood between her and her sister, blood starting to pool around the fingers that Lipa held to her torso. "No..." Portia begged, "Lipa! No!" She ignored the other two guards and Kai who seemed to be frozen as she rose to her feet, grabbing the now falling young Prothean. "No!" She cried.

"It's all right, Portia." Lipa's voice was soft and serene now. "For so long all I was, was hate. Rage. All I wanted was blood to avenge my Madre. I learned... I learned a better way..." She reached up a slow. Limp hand and caressed the shuddering girl's brow. "Not your fault, girl." Then she fell to her knees, dragging the smaller human with her.

"Medic!" Portia screamed, her keen overpowering. "Mika! Send help!" She cried as she held the dying Prothean.

"Medics are on the way." Mika's voice was stunned. "Portia... There isn't time. The bullet hit both of her hearts."

"No..." Portia said, her world shattering around her. "What have I done?" She demanded. She reached for the pistol at her feet but Kai kicked it toward the guards who hadn't moved. She laid Lipa's still form out and knelt beside it. "What have I done?" She repeated forlornly.

"Not you." Lipa's voice was soft as the mortally wounded Prothean slowly slipped away. She levered herself up a bit and latched hand on Portia's collar. "Promise me, Portia. Do not let the evil ones who made you win. Do not follow my path. Only death and destruction lie on that path, Portia. Find a better way. I... Love..." Then she sighed and was still. Portia stared at the limp form for a long moment before slowly reaching out and closing the four sightless eyes.

"I love you too, Lipa." Portia said calmly before she collapsed over the still form, sobbing.

For several minutes, there was silence in the corridor, then Portia rose and stepped back as Raan'ita and Scholar came running. One look and they know. Both had identical expression on their faces, but started to work anyway.

"Portia?" Kai's voice was soft as the girl stepped towards the guards. "Portia!" She snapped as the girl held out her wrists for binders.

"I am a threat, Kai." Portia said calmly. "If I can kill Lipa, I can kill anyone. You cannot take the chance. Please..." She begged the guards who stared at one another. "If I had been restrained, I wouldn't have been able to kill her!" She snapped.

"Not necessarily." The elder of the two guards said with a shake of his head. "It was the program, not you, child."

"I am child no more." Portia said softly. "I just shot my innocence." She bowed her head and did not move as Kai stepped forward and embraced her. Then her voice turned flat. "I don't care what it takes, Kai, C-Flat Viridian, I want this crap gone. I want it out of my head. Now." She demanded.

"It doesn't work like that, Portia." Raan'ita rose from her fruitless attempts to revive, leaving Scholar to work. "Hurting is always easier than healing. It is not your fault."

"No." Portia said softly. "It is not my fault. But it is my responsibility. My finger pulled the trigger. I could be a threat to everyone on this station. So... On that note... Mika!" She snapped.

"I am here, Portia." The gentle voice of the woman inhabiting the station's artificial intelligence system came.

"Mika, you must ignore any commands given by me until and unless the medical professionals are all in agreement that I am clean." Portia paused and then scowled. "And corroborate any commands I give with Anya."

"Portia..." Mika's voice was super soft now. "You are hurting. It's okay."

"No, it's not." Portia snapped. "I am a threat. Kai..." She looked at her sister through tear streaked eyes. "Get me to C-Flat Viridian before I hurt anyone else...please?" She begged.

"Come on, sis." Kai said, steering her sister towards the door she had come from. "She will make you feel better."

"It won't go away." Portia said sadly, but allowed herself to be led. "What I did will never go away." She tensed as Kai led her into the room, but the Rachni queen that sat inside looked as forlorn as Portia felt.

"No it will not, Portia, sister of Anya." C-Flat Viridian said sadly through Kai. "But we will do what we can." The Rachni indicated a bed that had been set up nearby. "Lie down."

Portia needed no urging. She moved mechanically to the bed and lay down with her head toward the Rachni. Soothing numbness swept through her as C-Flat Viridian's pheromones worked to calm her. Kai leaned close to kiss Portia's brow as the girl shut her eyes.

"Rest well, sis." Kai said, taking her sister's hands in her own as something hard but gentle clasped her head.

"I will find a better way." Portia promised as soothing darkness took her in. But...


Suddenly Portia lay on another surface. Harsh white light surrounded her, and when she looked up, figures in white were there, moving around.

"You will be our instrument of vengeance, daughter." The voice of her father came from nearby. "If all else fails, you will destroy the station using the destruct codes provided. Cerberus will rise from the ashes, borne anew to defend humanity. To ensure we take our rightful places as overlords!"

"No!" Portia tried to scream but the tubes in her mouth stymied her as harsh mechanical devices lowered around her head. "Not again..." She whimpered.

"No!" Another voice, one she didn't know, sounded from nearby. "Not again!" The sound of gunfire was sharp in the room, but then, as quickly as it started, it ended. Then the voice was gentle. "Easy, girl, let's get you out of that mess." Something pulled the machinery away from her and then gentle hands were pulling tubes out of her. She gagged and retched, aware that the hands were rolling her onto her side, cleaning up the mess as soon as it happened.

"Who...?" Portia asked as soon as she could form coherent thought. She looked up into piercing green eyes and froze She KNEW that face. Every human knew that face. The N7 armor, the Avenger rifle, all that was also familiar. It was on almost every official extranet site since the war had ended. "Shepard?"

"Sort of." The woman who had been the first human Spectre smiled at Portia as she helped the girl sit up. "This isn't real, Portia. This is a representation of your mind. Of the horror that was done to you."

"But...aren't you... dead?" Portia flushed as she asked that, embarrassed.

"Yeah." Shepard said with a nod. "But I still have work to do, so I am still around. Sort of."

"That doesn't make any sense." Portia complained as the woman hugged her. "Hey!" She protested, squeezed against the hard armor.

"Sorry." The older human said contritely. "I have worn the armor for so long it feels like a second skin. But you have had a bad day."

"I shot my friend." Portia said softly. Tears starting to fall again. "I killed my friend. I killed Lipa!"

"It wasn't you." Shepard said gently. "But you won't take my word for it. So... maybe..." The older human's face took on a look of intense concentration and then she smiled. "Thought so. She was part of us. Hold tight." The Specter warned. Portia had a bare moment to grasp hold of the Spectre before the world fell away.

When Portia could see again, she was standing on an odd green square. She stared at it, unsure. Was it solid, or just energy. Then she stared at her hands, which were glowing FAR brighter than that normally did. She stared around, fear coming. But then she froze as a completely impossible voice sounded from nearby.

"Now, don't start that again." Portia's eyes went VERY wide as another square materialized nearby and a familiar form appeared on it. Lipa was grinning. "Hello Portia."

"Lipa?" Portia felt faint, but managed to stay on her feet. "How? I... I killed you."

"It wasn't you." Lipa said with a sigh as the square she was on touched Portia's and she came close to sweep the girl into a hug. "And you know what? Things have changed, significantly, in the last ten years. I may be able to come back if Scholar can save my body, since Obligatha saved my data patterns into long term storage. Thank you by the way..." She addressed the air gratefully.

"We are glad to save lives rather than take them." A soft and gentle female voice sounded from everywhere. Portia stiffened, but the voice was super soft. "Have no fear, Portia, sister of Anya. No harm will come to you and the controls in your mind are being eradicated."

"Too late for some." Portia said, hugging the Prothean. "I can't stay, can I?" She asked, in a tone far too wise for her years.

"Portia..." Lipa said kindly as she returned the embrace. "I wanted to stop you from killing your sister. I did. That probably would have destroyed you completely, which was likely your father's intention. But no, you have to go back."

"Figured." Portia said sadly as she hugged the Prothean tighter. "I will find a better way. And anything I can do to help you come back, I will do." She swore.

"Talk to Scholar, he will be busy repairing my body or cloning me a new one. And as for finding a new way? I bet you will, you stubborn human." Lipa said with a smile as she let go and backed up. Was she fading or was Portia?

"One question..." Portia asked, on the edge of sleep.

"One." Lipa said with a grin.

"Was that really Shepard?" Portia asked dubiously.

"Now that would be telling." The voice of what had to be the Reaper was amused. "Sleep Portia. When you wake, you will be free." Portia smiled and did as instructed.