Severus felt out of breath, his chest heaving up and down and sweat dripping from his face. It was difficult to imagine that the room his was in had once been a classroom, albeit an abandoned one. The old desks lay in splinters all over the room, some remnants heaped on top of one another while others were ground nearly into sawdust. The walls were scored with long black marks, as if from a demonic whip and the windows were shattered, allowing cool air inside the castle. While he still felt nearly on fire everywhere, the new temperatures that had quickly followed the arrival of autumn brought, with each passing moment, an increased awareness of his soggy shirt and bent collar clinging tightly to him beneath his new set of robes.
Stepping around the detritus that littered the room, he stared out of one of the empty holes toward the Forbidden Forest. He made to rest his hands on the cold stone, but jerked his off hand up in surprise as a pain shot through his palm. Shaking it, he watched as the offending shard of glass fell down to join its broken brothers below. He would have to fix this. It was only good fortune no one – professor or student – had been out for a stroll. With a flick of his wand the window began to right themselves and Severus turned his attention to fixing his injured hand.
We should follow the steps set out, Severus.
He clenched his fist only to feel the blood run faster instead of merely seeping. First to clean. He winced. Next to mend. He shivered. Last to seal. He watched, an almost invisible film covered the space where the cut had been. It was important that the magic not be disturbed. The superficial healing was easy enough, but the slightly deeper portion of the tissue and nerves would take longer to naturally join again. The cut had bisected his…no. Divination, at least that which was taught at Hogwarts, was an art for fools. Fools and muggle-minglers bent on becoming con artists at best. Nevermind those who made their gift a carnival trick.
Does that feel better? Oh! It's actually working!
Opening his eyes again the warmth of her smile and embrace, one of many he'd captured – no etched – in his mind over the years faded. His reality was this room. Cold. Hard. His path was clear now and he would travel it. Without her for the time being, but perhaps – the Dark Lord willing – with her after they had reshaped their world in His image. Severus was confident that Potter – even in his mind he spat the name – would meet a grisly end with his blood traitor family or better yet, showcase the cowardice that surely lurked beneath his mask of arrogance and flee. Perhaps after the school had been broken…this summer, her last in Cokeworth to be sure, but yes, this summer he would find a way. Two long years…Lily could forgive him after all that time. Fixing his collar and tie, he raised his wand. It was time for the reconstruction to begin.
Exiting the restored classroom, Severus nearly ran into Regulus and Astrid. He stepped aside quickly while she caught herself on the corner of the hallway. He glowered at both.
"What are you two doing?"
Regulus brushed a bit of dust from his robe. "She's looking for Fawley. Rounds tonight. I'm just looking for something to do."
Astrid spotted his hand before he could reposition it away from her. "Some project in there?" she asked.
"Nothing," Severus snapped. "Practicing the spell I've been developing."
Regulus watched him for a moment before nodding.
"What spell?"
"It's none of your concern, Astrid," the younger boy replied.
She rolled her eyes, shifting her attention to straightening her prefect badge. "Doesn't seem to work very well if it's cutting you."
Severus felt the heat rising within him again. Controlling his expression, he drew his wand from his pocket, sizing it up as he angled it just a touch in her direction. "I have been looking for an experimental subject."
"I'd rather stay in one piece."
"Yes," he said, tightening his lips. "I'm sure that would be preferable for all of us." Severus shifted his eyes to Regulus for a moment before refocusing. "I'm not sure what Hogwarts would do without your dazzling displays on the Quidditch pitch."
Regulus cleared his throat. "Well…we can stand here gabbing or you can tell us what we can do to help."
"Help?"
"Of course. You're not intending to let another week pass without…progress…are we? As I understand things, your application hasn't been fully approved yet."
Severus took a step forward, closing the distance between himself and the other wizard to mere inches. "You'd do well to remember the company we're in," he hissed.
Severus remained still, making sure his eyes bored into his housemate's. Though Regulus had one of the aptest minds in Slytherin, it was too obvious he was making a power play and it was crucial not to be the one who flinched. He hadn't risen this far – sacrificed this much – to see his role snatched from him by anyone, much less someone younger, whose path had been far easier due to the strength of his name. Severus's pursed lips twisted into a smirk as Regulus stepped away.
"Just because you're unaware of my every maneuver doesn't mean I've been standing idly by."
Astrid sighed. "If you boys are done measuring, I still need to find Leo."
"If you're asking for my help, I'm afraid I have more pressing concerns," Severus said.
"Planning to burn an effigy in the dormitory?" she quipped.
Regulus laughed. "Good one, Benton. We could…if you like…"
Severus contemplated to the proposal, irritated by the fact that it cut both ways. In the past it had been all too easy. Lily's notions about he and Potter and particularly the comparison she'd established between them had blinded her to his role in turning the rivalry between them truly toxic. Now he would have to operate more carefully. Regulus's open involvement was a given, but how to use it to its greatest effect…
"What do you have in mind?" Astrid asked.
Regulus raised an eyebrow. "You're in?"
She waggled her wand. "I play Quidditch you dolt. I'm not a little princess."
"Yes, but you are so careful about dirtying your hands with anything controversial."
"Mother and father's doing. They wanted to spend the summer preparing me before I jumped into the fray."
Severus watched the exchange. She smiled easily while flashing her wit the other boy's way.
"Think the dollies in your playpen prepared you for–"
Leaning in. Emphasizing her femininity. Interesting.
"Much as I appreciate you finally managing to embrace the full breadth of being in Slytherin, I'm afraid Potter is a bridge much too far for someone of your inexperience."
Predictably, her hands went straight to her hips.
"Go find Fawley," Severus continued, "and Imogen if she's available. Tell her I've sent you to learn."
"I already know what you're about," she huffed. "You may do well enough out here in the castle, but–"
"Your knowledge isn't my concern. Your capability to carry out my instructions – especially simple ones – is." Severus glared at her. "Beyond that, I seriously doubt that you will be the only one enlightened during the lesson."
Astrid responded with one of the most insincere smiles he had ever seen before striding away.
Her footfalls having faded into silence, he turned his attention back to Regulus. "How many times must I remind you not to be so cavalier about these conversations?"
"She's a Slytherin…in my year…she's passionate about the cause and would already be among our number if her family were more well known. She's hardly to be blamed for her distant relatives' decisions."
The younger boy was taller and fitter by some distance, but that did not stop Severus from grabbing him by the robe and dragging him into the classroom he'd only recently repaired.
"Benton is the least of my concerns. Anyone could've heard you!"
He yanked his robe back and stepped away. "Implications, at best."
"Implications are what begin to raise defenses. We were caught before because of Slaughter and Hassell's lackadaisical attitudes toward secrecy. We're almost certainly being monitored, by Potter and his band of buffoons if no one else."
Regulus ran his hands down the length of his hair, taking a deep breath as he spun away. Removing the ribbon that had been dislodged from the nape of his neck, he set about securing his ponytail once again. Just a summer before it had been as unkempt as his brother's and far shorter, but apparently an encounter with Lucius and a handful of others in the movement had led him to invest in a more refined appearance. The boy turned around.
"When are we going to do something?"
"The time has not yet come."
"Says you…"
"Says the Dark Lord!"
Even coming from his own mouth, Severus immediately recognized their effect. Total silence. The complete termination of discussion or resistance. It was as it should be – whether by awe or fear, the Dark Lord's word would always be the last on any subject. Severus placed a hand on Regulus's shoulder.
"We must maintain their focus for now. Permit them the hidden intimidations, the quiet encouragement of those favorable to submission. And while they work from within this system. We will work to cripple it from without."
While James was off doing, well, whatever it was couples did during the day while they were stuck at Hogwarts and Remus was keeping Sirius from losing his mind, temper, or both the more minutes ticked away, Peter decided to head to the library. It had been awhile since he'd been other than to study and with everyone else distracted he supposed someone had to get some kind of plan going for the Halloween Feast. Unfortunately, unlike last time, strolling the lake at done nothing for him and so he found himself back in the Great Hall with his History of Magic text and half a roll of parchment. Opening it up to page 522 he muttered the required incantation and smiled as the tentative list they'd developed just over two weeks ago replaced the dull section about yet another period of warring between tribes of ogres. While the map was their collective crowning achievement, the book was all his. At first blush, it would be considered a simple application of the Protean Charm, but Peter had been able to make his version much more effective, combining it with a single layer substitution and linking it to a well-guarded Labyrinthine List that enabled him to modify in which book and on which page the altered text would appear.
This time the rundown of ideas was lengthy and yet…Peter didn't find it up to their usual standard. Exploding pumpkins – done. Goblet geysers could be fun, but were really only a minor variation on his manipulation of the Slytherins' plates. Sirius had, of course, broached the subject of doing something to the Head Table again though Remus, joined this time by James, had strongly objected. His idea of shrinking the table's legs at an accelerating pace throughout the evening meal was decent, but he had to agree that as satisfying as pranking their own professors would be it wasn't nearly worth the hell that would follow. There were others, but they'd been tired and were frankly even more dire.
With a heavy sigh, he reached into his satchel for an apple to quell his returning hunger. After rummaging for a moment, he pulled his hand out victoriously, but instead of another smile he grimaced, sucking in air through his teeth. Setting down the apple he saw a thin line of blood across the top of his index finger, just above the first knuckle. Looking into the bag he plucked out the offending paper – the letter he'd received from home this morning. He'd planned to read it at lunch, but with all the,,,he supposed it could be called excitement…he'd forgotten. Ripping the back open unceremoniously he pulled out the thin sheet of sheet of parchment within. He frowned. Mum was splitting it again. Hopefully this time only for personal use. They didn't need another visit from a patrol wizard. Last time it was a warning, but it was clear she'd be charged if it happened again. He wondered if they'd be so brusque with the Potters or the Blacks…even a no-name family in a better part of the city.
Dearest Peter:
I am ashamed to write you so early in the year, but I have been forced to dip into your savings from the summer for a visit to the Healer for Hannah. She has become much better at staying silent when home alone while I try to bring home something for us plying wares in Knockturn again. It's times like these I wish I had focused more on my studies at Hogwarts, as I know you are, so I would be able to brew more rudimentary remedies myself and let her fight off the rest. I don't think rushing for the powerful potions they give is good for her.
I wonder too whether you might be able to earn something while away at school. Perhaps in Hogsmeade or in the Quidditch stands. I know outside what I am given by others, I only sell my trinkets, but the first years might enjoy them still and every little bit helps. I'm working on finding you something proper for the break between terms, but converting muggle money may prove better for you than anything I've uncovered in the ads in the Prophet lately.
I have run on too much again about our problems here and I know they always weigh heavy on your mind. Still, I want you to remember how proud I am of you. Already far more O.W.L.s than I got – and much better marks. Once you earn your N.E.W.T.s there will be respectable opportunities everywhere and things will be easier to manage for Hannah and I.
Your sister also insists that I ask for another story from you to read her at bedtime. Don't let it distract you from your schoolwork, but she does so love what you come up with and badly misses you – especially when she isn't well.
Love always,
Mum
Crumbling the letter in his fist he was awash more with anger – at least resentment – than he was shame. Already she'd lost the job at Madam Malkin's from the summer. It seemed she was honestly incapable of any kind of meaningful persistence, going through seven jobs at least just since he'd gotten old enough to notice. And that wasn't counting the things she did on the side. Heading back to Knockturn she was likely being used as a fence and that couldn't mean anything good for the family. If she were to make a misstep with the wrong person or allow them to find their home. He shuddered. This last job had at least made it a year and he'd had hope when he headed back to school that it might just stick. He should've known better. She doted well, and at least there was that, but it was cold comfort and she was already trying to teach Hannah to pick up her slack at home, that before she could even pick up a wand. Things would be easier to manage for he and Hannah once he got a job. Mum would hem and haw, but she'd be happier in the end without the responsibility.
Suddenly he was bumped in the back. He steadied himself on the table, catching his face just before impact. He saw Drayton Hassell – the little shit – walking away snickering to whatever fellow fifth year he was trying to impress. Peter had half a mind to hex him, but judging by the lack of people in the hall and what had just happened he wasn't likely to get away with it.
Shrugging, he picked up his things and walked out again. Remus was studying and Sirius was probably still nursing his face. Maybe he could find Polly? She was a year below him, granted, and not even in his house, but they'd struck up conversation a few times around the lake and even once when she'd joined him to watch a Quidditch practice. Alas, she was probably unavailable since she'd started spending so much time with her best friend Lynde. The two were inseparable lately, always close and always giggling. Side effect of rooming together for so long he supposed. They hadn't been that way before summer, but who knew what changed. He'd wander on until he found something of interest. Soon he'd have the setting sun at least. From the looks of things, that would have to be enough company.
Marie Thomas perked up as Renee walked in and dropped her books on the bed. Things had been unbearably quiet recently and as much as they tried, nobody else really understood what the pair were going through. Well, one person she supposed, but he was in no mood to talk about it. After another rough night it had been nice to sleep in until the afternoon.
"Brought you something," the brunette offered as she crossed the room with her purse. After rummaging for a moment out came a sandwich, which was unceremoniously plopped between her elbows and just shy of her chin.
"Seriously? They didn't have pudding or anything?"
"So ungrateful," Renee said, shaking her head. "Of course they had pudding, you just have to actually come outside to get it."
Marie sighed before flopping her face into the comforter. "No energy," she groaned into the bed.
Renee slid halfway onto the mattress to the side of her. "Nightmare again?"
For quite some time, the blonde witch was silent, the only clue she was still awake the barely perceptible rising and falling of her back. She turned her head toward the side Renee occupied. "Yeah."
"Maybe you should see Madam Pomfrey."
"You always say that," Marie snapped. "I hate going dreamless. You know I hate it."
"And that was when your dreams were nice."
"It's stupid. I don't even know why I have them. You know, I didn't even see her place. We weren't there."
Renee rubbed her forehead. "It's not stupid."
Marie sat up. "Do you think…she's alive?"
Now it was Renee's turn to be quiet. The dark-haired girl got up and walked toward the window, staring outside. "She wrote the letter, right? To James."
"I guess. It's hard. She must've written fast. It hardly sounded like her. A little I guess, but…I don't know. That's part of my nightmare sometimes. That they made her write it before they marched her off."
"That doesn't make sense…"
"I know it doesn't. I just…"
"I think she's alive," Renee said matter-of-factly. "Anyway, how's sis?"
Marie rolled her eyes. "Fine, I guess. Honeymooning. Still. Despite everything. I'm starting to wonder a little if she's coming back."
"She's still writing isn't she?"
"Course. Even now she's married, Mum would lose it. And she'd drag Dad along with."
"To you?"
"A little. You know…they saw this a couple of weeks ago. They still want to go there. She still talks in them, but it's just…different."
"Everything is, I suppose."
"Any idea what you're doing next year yet?"
Renee dug out a thick stack of parchment, tossing various numbers of pieces on the floor in turn. "Ministry. MT, IMC, RCMC." A larger group hit the floor with a thud. "Businesses," she added sullenly. "I guess I still want RCMC, but my parents keep telling me it's a dead end. Especially the way things are they think I should try patrol for the DMLE. That only needs O.W.L.s. Or journalism. Though I think that might've been a joke because I was writing in my journal so often this summer."
"You have to go for RCMC! It's what you've always wanted! Everyone always tries DMLE – more than ever now probably – but that means you'll have more and better openings."
"Maybe you're right."
"Forget your parents. You're of age. Besides, you can't live for anyone else."
Renee looked at Marie pointedly.
"Yeah, yeah…" she looked down after waving Renee away.
"You said it…"
"I know, it's just. She didn't deserve it you know? Everything was finally falling into place."
Renee nodded. "Yeah…it really seemed like it was."
Marie frowned, drawing her arms underneath her and laying down fully on the bed. Sighing, she glanced up at her dark-haired friend.
Renee was nibbling again, this time at the end of her fingernail instead of her lip. Noticing she'd been caught, she jerked it away.
"What is it?"
"It's nothing."
It was Marie's turn to deliver a harsh stare.
"Really…"
"Right. Going to be tough again, are you?"
"Marie–"
"No. Come on. You give me hell until I talk. It's my turn."
"It's not important. Honestly."
"You don't," Marie gestured at Renee's hand, "do that when it's not important. At least not when it's not important to you."
Renee sighed. "It's just…lunch."
"Apples again?"
The comment elicited a brief smile and a nose-only laugh. "No. Not apples. James."
"Still having a rough go? Maybe we should talk to him again. It would be…easier's not the right word…better? If we were in this together."
"Yeah…I think he's found somebody to talk to. He's dating."
Marie sat up. "You wait all this time to tell me he's dating? Are you serious? It's been three months – barely."
"Alright, and see this is why. I've made you mad," Renee.
"Aren't you? It's like you said. Three bloody months."
"She's gone."
"You said–"
"I said I think she's alive. Doesn't mean she's ever coming back."
"Who?"
"What?"
"Who is it? Who's he with?"
Renee cocked her head. "Actually…it's Lily Evans."
"But–"
"Yeah. I said the same. But you know it's really not all that crazy if you think about it."
"It's completely crazy."
Renee shrugged. "I don't think so. Their biggest difference is how tightly they're wound."
"Ooooh," Marie seethed, "I just want to tell him off. Her too. But him more than anything."
"Don't," Renee snapped.
"And why not?"
"He's dealing with it his own way. Like my journals and your nightmares. He's still hurting anyway."
"Really looks it…"
"He is. And you know it. Look at Harris. Merlin, Marie…he still can't even say her name."
A/N: Well…that whole 'finishing the novel for NaNo didn't really pan out did it. But I'm back and I've finally finished another chapter. Hopefully stepping away from the beginning and the reactions will make it easier to move forward from here on out, but I thank each and every one of you sticking with me as I keep pushing on toward the finish. It really is each of you that keeps me going when I feel like I'll never turn the next corner with this fic.
