AN: This was so hard to get out. Truthfully, I didn't know how Wally would react upon waking up. I just started to write and the story flowed with what felt right. I hope it meets everyone's expectations! And there will definitely be one more chapter, maybe two depending on how long this one part I have planned ends up!
DISCLAIMER: I don't own the Justice League.
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Wally kept his eyes closed. He felt the soft mattress of the medical bed beneath him and heard the slight shifting of feet around him. The fabric around his eyes stuck to his skin where his tears had soaked in and dried, and he wondered if any of them had noticed that he had cried in his sleep.
He knew exactly what they had seen. Each memory had filtered through his mind and brought back every emotion like he was reliving it all over again. His accelerated brain came up with a hundred thoughts a second, thinking of every scenario of how this could play out, but after a few seconds, he had to stop. He wished he could just lie there forever because he would never be ready to face the league, but he couldn't put it off any longer.
He inhaled deeply and then let out a sigh. He opened his eyes and turned his head to find all the founders plus Dick, Jason, Hal, and Roy in the room with him. His eyes widened in shock as he hadn't expected all of them to be there. As Flash sat up, he reached up and pulled the helmet off his head and then let it fall to the floor.
Their eyes seemed to follow it before looking back up at him.
Hal took a half step towards him. "Wally? You okay?"
Wally's eyes were still covered by his white eye lenses, so no one saw his eyes flicker over everyone's expressions. When he said nothing, everyone's faces turned worried.
Without even thinking about what she was doing, Shayera flung herself out of her seat on the couch and threw her arms around Wally in a tight hug.
Flash stiffened at the contact, but Shayera just squeezed tighter before kissing his cheek and letting go. "I love you, too, little brother," she said.
Flash tried to smile, he really did, but it drooped almost immediately. He asked in a monotone voice, "None of you are mad?"
"Of course not," Superman said, and the others nodded.
Flash looked away. "Well, this makes it more awkward then."
"How do you figure?" asked John with a tilt of his head and a raised eyebrow.
"Because," Wally said. "Anger I can deal with, not…this," he said, gesturing at them.
"What?" John asked.
Wally sighed. "You don't even realize you're doing it. Look at yourselves," Wally demanded. "You're all afraid I'm going to crumble! Stop it! I'm not going to break. Stop looking at me like that and treat me like you normally would. You'd say something like 'About time you woke up from your nap," and Shayera would roll her eyes and joke about how the league's kitchen would be empty in a few minutes. Bats wouldn't even be here, or else he'd leave with a grunt as soon as I'd woken up." Wally cut himself off, pressing his lips tightly together.
"Dude," Roy said, "We're just worried about you."
"Well stop!" Wally snapped. "I'm fine."
"No you're not."
The calm sentence was spoken by Dick, and Flash turned towards him incredulously. Of all the people not to take his side, Wally had never thought it'd be Dick. Wally couldn't help but feel a small pinprick of betrayal. He thought Dick understood.
But that was just it. Dick did understand, finally. He was staring at Wally intently, having figured out what was wrong.
Wally didn't want people to pity him, and Dick didn't think anyone did, but they did worry about him. To Wally, that was the same thing because other than his aunt and uncle, he'd never had anyone to worry over him. He'd always had to take care of himself. He'd always been so independent; he didn't know how to lean on someone else. He'd always had to be the rock.
Being the focus of everyone's concern was new to Wally. Sure, his friends and family cared about him, but none of them, Dick realized, had ever been the ones to take care of Wally. They had never gone out of their way to make sure he was okay. They had never solved his problems. They had never given him half of what he gave them.
Now that they were giving Wally their full attention, he didn't know how to deal with it, and soon he'd give into his instincts and-
"I'm taking a few days off from the league," Wally said angrily, rushing from the room.
Run, thought Dick.
"Wally!" Diana and Shayera both called after him, but he ignored them as he made his way to the main deck, so he could teleport back to Earth.
When Flash entered the main deck, though, he found it filled with every member of the league. He stopped in shock, and the low hum of voices quickly died as everyone turned to stare at him.
Wally was not ready for this. He wasn't ready to have all his secrets out there, despite Harbinger's warning. He didn't want this. He didn't want the admiration shining in Supergirl's and Stargirl's eyes. He didn't want the interest showing on Fire's, Ice's, Dove's, and Atom's faces, all for different reasons. He didn't want Green Arrow and Booster Gold to gawk at him like he was some alien creature. He didn't want to see the betrayal on Elongated Man's face nor the sympathy on Vixen's. He didn't want the whispers starting as various league members cupped their hands over their mouths to their neighbors' ears. He just wanted to be the Flash everyone had thought he was. Then maybe life wouldn't be so complicated.
And as they continued to stare at him, Wally felt anger rise to the surface. How dare they judge him! Sure, his memories were on the monitors, but they weren't forced to watch them! How would any of them feel if their deepest secrets had been shown to everyone in the league?
Flash couldn't take any more of this. "WHAT?" he shouted aggressively.
Some of the leaguers flinched back. They had never dealt with an angry Flash before. It just didn't happen. Even frustrated, Flash was always very passive. The Flash standing before them now was radiating anger and hurt, and everyone felt the need to avoid looking him in the eyes.
Flash's hands tightened into fists and his face hardened. He ignored everyone as he sped over to the teleport controls and typed in the coordinates to Central. He kept his head up and his gaze averted from the leaguers as he stood on the teleport pad until bright blue light distorted his vision.
As soon as Flash was back on earth, he took off running. He made his usual round through Central and found no one causing trouble. Flash gritted his teeth in frustration. The one time he needed to beat something up and everything was peaceful.
He left Central and headed for the outskirts. He kept running, but it wasn't enough. He wanted to run; run from his past, his shame. He felt the wind hit him harder, his feet hit the ground faster. He was going faster, faster, and just as he was on the brink, when he was so close to that edge of the Speedforce…
He pulled back.
His face slackened and he slowly came to a stop.
He couldn't do it. He couldn't run anymore. It went against everything in him, but Flash just couldn't run away from who he was. He couldn't run from the people he loved and the ones he'd lost. For every bad memory, he had a good memory to go along with it. He couldn't give them up. He wouldn't.
He stood there, in the middle of a forgotten highway, his eyes closed, and just thought of everything that had happened in his life.
He opened his eyes as he came to a conclusion.
This life of lies was over.
He was Wallace West, and he was the Flash. They were different parts of the same person, and his past was his past. There was no more pretending. He didn't want to pretend anymore. He wanted to be able to trust his new family. They deserved to know the truth, and he was glad that they finally did, even if he didn't like how.
But he still just wasn't ready to face them, not even his brothers or Hal. For all the promises and secrets they'd shared, they'd still looked at Wally differently like the others had.
Wally needed normal.
What was the one place he could go to find that?
Galatea was at his house, and for once, he didn't feel like playing the good host, so that was out. Wally's mind then came up with the answer, and his feet started moving automatically towards the one person that had always been there.
Grammy.
In seconds, Flash was in Keystone City and in the Garrick shed behind Joan's house. He changed, stuffed his costume back in his ring, and then walked out and over to knock on the back door.
Wally didn't have to wait long before Joan opened it and welcomed him inside.
As soon as the door shut, Wally enveloped Joan in a hug. Joan quickly hugged him back, but frowned when Wally didn't let go.
"Wally?" she asked softly. "Is something wrong?"
Wally didn't say anything for a minute. He just needed to hug his Grammy like he used to when he was little and needed to forget about what happened with his birth parents for a while.
"The league knows," Wally muttered. "Long story short: my memories were shown on the Watchtower monitors. They all know about me and my parents and Barry and Iris and the Speedforce and everything."
Grammy Joan sighed and patted his back. She waited patiently for another minute before Wally finally loosened his hold. He hung his head, his eyes downcast.
"Oh, Wally," Joan said with a slight shake of her head. "You knew this would happen eventually."
"I know," whispered Wally. "I just don't want things to change."
Joan smiled slightly. "Sweetheart, life is change. It's how we grow."
Wally looked sadly at Joan.
"What's the worst the can happen from them knowing?" she asked.
Wally shrugged one shoulder. "I could be kicked off the league…They could refuse to talk to me…I'd be ostracized from the hero community."
Joan raised her eyebrows. "The people you tell me about don't sound like the types to do that to their friends."
Wally didn't respond to this, and Joan really started to worry. Her brow crinkled. "Don't worry, honey. If they're half as decent as you say they are, they'll accept you for you. Why don't you stay here tonight?" Joan suggested.
Wally nodded glumly. "I'll call Teah and tell her I won't be home," he said in a low monotone.
Joan's face didn't clear of worry the rest of the evening. Wally hardly touched the dinner she made him, and for a speedster, that was more than troubling. She stayed awake until late into the night until she could hear soft snoring from the other room.
Joan got up quietly and tiptoed out of her room to press her ear against the door down from hers. She lightly grasped the doorknob and opened the door a crack. Wally could barely be seen on the bed, sleeping fitfully.
As she stood there, Joan bit her lip. She knew what she wanted to do would violate Wally's privacy, but he was her grandchild, and a grandmother's got to do what a grandmother's got to do to protect her grandbaby.
Joan released her lip as resolve settled in, and she slowly and quietly snuck over to the dresser across from Wally. On top was his golden Flash ring and his Justice League communicator. She picked up the comm link and carried it back with her to her room.
As Joan settled back into bed, she smiled as she thought of what would happen when the sun rose in a few hours.
...
AN: Oh yeah, definitely two more chapters.
