Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy, et al.

Author's Note: Thank you to those of you willing to take the time to leave a note for me, it means a lot to me to read your POV after being submersed in mine. Please continue to let me know what you think! I don't say this often because I tend to write and write and write ... but enjoy this chapter, it's both short and sweet.

Chapter 19 – Love Will Keep Us Alive – Part 4 of 4

Derek rolled over, waking up to a layer of cold he hadn't expected. He opened his eyes – barely a crack to focus on the fiery glow of the numbers of the digital clock – it was 5:54 AM, dawn would break soon, he paused, resting his on his two most precious material possessions for a beat … his beloved copy of 'The Sun Also Rises' and Meredith's love letter – her heart letter – nestled deep within the binding where it would reside for all time. Derek smiled …the letter had lived to see its full circle moment. He sighed and pushed himself up against the headboard, his eyes darting around the dim shadowy light of the trailer in search of his lover.

"Now I've found you, there's no more emptiness inside."

And there he found her – swathed in indigo cashmere – her hair wild, already darker, her eyes transfixed on the looming horizon, a white cup of steaming hot jasmine tea sat on the small table in front of her – tufts of her fragrant Balinese favorite twirled into the air – all of which accentuated her inner peace. He watched as she closed her shining eyes for a beat in time – taking a deep breath – she reached beyond the folds of the blankets to brace herself on the back of the chair in front of her. Derek smiled; his imagination running wild with thoughts of where her spirit might be – perhaps the Zen cottage – the enclave of the blankets fell open and her full breasts tumbled free. Eyes still closed, she snaked her other hand down and caressed the naked flesh of her growing belly; the silhouette of her radiant, flushed skin, beautifully illuminated and contrasted against the darker of the cashmere.

"I was standing all alone against the world outside."

Meredith presently stood just inside the anterior doorway of the Zen cottagespiritually, she was there and could get there easily – to meditate, to bask in the island's warm humidity, to press the sweet fragrant air into her lungs … to cherish her time there … to remember and connect with the peace she and Derek found there. For the last couple of days had been hard … more than hard – especially since bidding farewell to Cristina a day and a half ago – her friend was gone and much like she had been, off on her own expedition … off to find herself – to surrender in her own way – to reclaim her life as he own.

"You were searching for a place to hide."

And so it was there inside the precious enclave of the Zen cottage that Meredith smiled broadly and listened to her heart – yes, she found her natural, congruent beat and listened intently, the soothing trickle of the fountain, the only other sound she could hear – knowing that only the truth would speak to her there and it did … because the truth was – Cristina was in good hands now – she was right where she was meant to be, even if that put her amongst a sea of hopeless, wounded, broken-hearted Somali refugees – yes, Meredith had faith – her dear friend was right where she was meant to be.

For the simple truth was that her union with Burke was destined to be broken – their karmic fate sealed long ago – ages ago, from secret apartments to secret tremors; it was all there in black and white … no, no, a union couldn't be solidified if there was no union to begin with. Right?

Closing her eyes more tightly now – Meredith stepped inside the anterior courtyard and moved toward the trickle of the fountain – again, heard but not seen and there inside her own moment – unfettered peace encapsulated her and the troubles of the last few days fell away – she rubbed her belly, connecting with their miracle baby under the weathered canopy of the cottage … yes, everything was as it should be … even with the dismantling of Cristina's relationship with Burke – they were all aligned, spiritual peace on the horizon – especially now that everything was quiet and the angst as of late passed out to sea like a dwindling storm.

"Now you've given me the will to survive."

Meredith heard the rustle of the sheets somewhere within the island breeze – Derek was awake – she opened her eyes, the Zen cottage fell away … the sky already a shade lighter, warmth radiating now – her lover was awake, he was all she needed – she turned to find him, already sitting up against his pillows – a lazy smile playing along his face, his hair wild, his boyish charm alive and well – the dull shadows no match for his natural peace.

"The sun's about to rise," Meredith whispered. "Good morning," she sighed, the aura of the Zen cottage still a cloak for her.

"Bring your tea," Derek said softly, he smiled. "Come back to bed," he whined, his voice still sleepy.

Meredith giggled, picked her teacup up and swiftly moved across the small space, her blankets trailing behind her. Dropping them at her feet, she handed the cup to Derek and slipped into bed, burrowing deeper into his heat as she did. Derek handed the cup to her; she smiled and took a sip of the sweet Balinese artifact before she offered the cup to Derek who also took a sip.

The couple sat in relative silence for several minutes, watching now as the trailer became a shade lighter, passing the teacup back and forth, waking up together… welcoming the dawn of a new day. Derek set the teacup down next to his book and rolled into Meredith, his hand instinctually moving down to the rounded flesh of her belly … rub, rub, rub … where Meredith's head found his shoulder as she too peered down, silently connecting, enchanted by the strokes of Derek's fingertips as he moved them along their miracle.

Derek leaned down and pressed a kiss on Meredith's head, she peeked up and smiled. "The sun is setting on Cristina's first day in Yemen – and all I can think – is that she's where she's meant to be," Meredith sighed, leaning up, she kissed the underside of Derek's neck, breathing him in, lacing her legs with his.

"She's with Owen," Derek stated evenly with a smile all his own.

"They're together," Meredith smiled, a giggle escaping her lips. "The 'dark and twisties'," she breathed, her fingertips dancing along his broad naked chest.

"This could be a disaster," Derek chuckled.

"Maybe …," Meredith smiled. "Maybe not … we'll see," she said, a small slice of hope shining through akin to the first light of the new day.

"We will … come closer," Derek sighed, drawing Meredith near, bringing her knee up and over his hipbone.

Meredith reflexively melted into her lover's heat, her hands moving up to flank his skull where their eyes met for a split-second – where recognition of wants and needs and desires were spoken now without words – before she closed her mouth over his, moaning in appreciation as he kissed her senseless, welcoming the new day just as she wished to with him … with zeal and passion.

"I need you," Meredith husked; her body on fire, all it took was one look … just one.

"Hmm, me too … need …," Derek said into their heat, one look and he was a goner … completely lost.

Facing each other, their hands went as wild as their mouths for one another – caressing, brushing, loving, massaging – and always engaging in the play of skin on skin contact. Derek's nimble fingers tenderly moving across her nipples, drawing her out, triggering her sex to pool within – tug, tug, tug – her clit pulsed, reacting as expected to his lithe touch, his cock already banging against her groin … her nipples hardening on his command as he skillfully moved his mouth down to taste her nubs.

"I would die for you."

She found her belly brushing against Derek's abdomen and she smiled; her hands clasped around his neck in an effort to ground herself – her own neck craning back and up – blinking she fought to keep her eyes trained on the lighter tone of the sky above them, the skylight … now a perfectly framed portal to the new day.

Reaching between them with one hand, she found the velvety soft skin of his cock – God she loved his cock – was all she could think as she fisted his durable muscle, instantly turned on by the evidence of his arousal … her vaginal muscles clenched, her channel became slick and ready, her sex permeated the hot air between them … she was hungry for him, pure and simple, it was the stuff of survival.

"I want you – inside me – I need you …," Meredith breathed, her mind floating away, her body writhing, aching for him to fill her up.

"Hmm, let's fill you up," Derek said thickly, his mouth on hers now, their tongues dancing and lapping for a beat before he attacked her fleshy breasts again – closing his mouth and hands over her sweet round nipples – nipping and biting and plucking on her flesh, suckling like that of a starving baby.

Arrested by the essence of his lover's sex and sultry voice, Derek felt his cock tighten inside his shaft, moving like a pulley now on his sack, igniting his core – that innate spark that belonged solely to Meredith Grey – the spark he loved, the spark that made him tick … that made him … him. He was hopeless and she knew it, she had him exactly where she wanted him and there was no place he'd rather be … ever.

"Climb the highest mountain."

Pulling his lips from the bead of her rosy nipple, he planted them on her hungry lips, breathing her in as he passed his hand down, down, down, stopping briefly to acknowledge her belly – rub, rub – and then lower, feeling Meredith spread her hips to provide him the access he was looking for, coaxing her slick pussy to open … for him, only … for him.

He met her gaze, her eyes heavy with passion and want – she rested her free foot on his hip bone, her pussy wet with her desire now – her sex filled the air and Derek wasted no time before he dipped his middle finger into the molten depths of her being … her muscles clamped down, she was his … he was hers.

"Now … Derek," Meredith breathed, her lips planted on his shoulder. She closed her eyes, his fingers expertly massaged her clit, around and around and around … her hips bucked, her muscles clenched.

She needed him.

"Meredith … hmm, now …," Derek muttered, lost inside his bliss – he slipped his thumb back into her depths – she grabbed it, her muscles pulsing, massaging, he pulled it free, sweeping his wet pad back and forth over her nerves, her hips bucked again.

He needed her.

No time like the present, Meredith reached down and bucked her hips forward, opening her free thigh wider, she massaged her clit with the fat tip of Derek's cock for a beat – her muscles clenched, her hungry eyes met his again – she led him home, guiding his ready rod into her ready and waiting pussy … slow, slow, slow, inch by beautiful inch … lost within his sinful, lustful gaze.

The world stopped spinning and everything went quiet save for their beating hearts and the reverberation of the raspy staccato of their breathing.

Nothing remained but the tufts of their hot, pungent air – their sex, them, them, them – the cold outside, no match for the fire of survival found within.

Eye to eye, nose to nose, chest to breast, legs and arms wrapped around one another, heads resting on a single shared pillow … they basked in their love and connection, Derek's hand found her belly. Meredith's muscles pulsed. His cock twitched.

"When we're hungry, love will keep us alive."

"I love you," Meredith whispered inside that still, hot moment, her mouth found his, she swept her tongue along his, massaging his nerves for a beat … she inched even closer – their muscles locked, interlinked, her pussy pulsed with need – her chest tight with intense love – and her eyes, though still focused, became glassy now – as the intensity of his gaze stole her breath away again.

Derek reached up and moved his fingers along Meredith's hairline – she became blurred around the edges – he gently pressed his lips to hers, his tongue darting out, pulsing against her nerves, his kisses became hungry … his heart gave out.

"There's nothing … nothing I wouldn't do for you," Derek choked out, unearthed emotion coursed through his body – his nerve-endings on high alert, his cock twitched again, jumping with need, her hips bucked up, she swallowed him whole – they began to move within and around each other.

Their hips and toned muscles fit together like pieces of a puzzle, the sum of the parts, completely compatible in mind, body and spirit – slip, slip, slip, deeper and deeper together – her free leg wrapped low around Derek's back, her full belly brushing against his … baby, baby, baby. His gasp filled the air as did hers – they began to work their machine harder and harder and harder... suffused together, the unique power of 'them' harmonizing now … all in the name of survival.

Meredith rolled into Derek, he found her mouth instinctively, his eyes closed in bliss now, kissing her with raw need – 'I love you, I love you' – he chanted, his hand sweeping down to her clit, his fingers massaged her nub, his cock lengthening, his sack tightening … her muscles holding him in place – right where she wanted him – right where he was destined to be for now and forever!

Untamed heat pooled deep in Meredith's core, her sweet juice flooding their machine – the heel of her free foot pressed against his ass cheeks, she felt him clench them down, his cock twitched; her muscles milked him dry – clench, own, mine, mine, mine, clench, swallow, pulse, pulse, pulse, milk, milk, milk – she took all he had and so much more!

Bountiful, blissful and beautiful orgasms came fast and furiously for the couple – their innate intensity for one another having won yet another battle of the wills of the world around them – the stress of ordinary life, again no match for the power of 'them' and their own resolve and need and spirit to survive for and with one another.

###

Derek stirred first, reaching down, he pulled the comforter up and over Meredith shoulder and hunkered down – their skin still pricked with heat, their hearts smoldered – but the air was cool, crisp and the morning wind barreled over the clearing, seeping into the trailer. He rubbed his cold nose into the warmth of Meredith's fragrant skin just below her earlobe and rested his head on her shoulder for a beat.

He took a deep breath – his elixir, their powerful sex funneled its way up, up, up – filling his lungs until peace cloaked them, he burrowed deeper and kissed the long line of her neck before he took stock of her side profile in the morning light cascading down around them from the skylight portal – her beautiful green eyes closed, her facial muscles relaxed, but happy – he smiled and traced his fingertips along her collarbone, traveling down, down, down, stopping to roll one of her pert nipples between his thumb and pointer finger, all the while watching a small smile play along his lover's beautiful face. She blushed; Derek closed his eyes and moved his hand down to her belly – 'good morning baby' – he left it there, connecting.

Meredith moved her hand, lacing her fingers through Derek's, she raised her thigh and draped it over his hip, leaning closer, she peeked at his side profile for a beat – making note of his sated and happy state of relaxation – his cheeks still flushed with passion, their sweet sex hanging in the air between them. She took a deep breath and lived inside the moment – the moment just after their lovemaking – the one she most often lived for, this time when everything was private and safe and aligned. Her chest tightened and she heaved a sigh as unforeseen tears pricked her eyes as she thought about her raw need for Derek and how she would never, ever be able to live without him.

"Meredith?" Derek asked, his free hand moved down, he caressed the smooth flesh of her derrière.

"She couldn't write her vows," Meredith offered into his heat. "Cristina," she clarified before pressing her lips to his shoulder.

"That's bothersome," Derek replied, finding Meredith's glassy eyes, shimmering now in the dim morning light.

"It is," she agreed, her hands flew to his skull. She smiled; her heart trembled. "I just …," she sighed. "I just want you to know … I don't have to write mine," she breathed with a smile, having finally found the quiet moment to tell her lover what had been on her mind for days now.

"You don't?" Derek asked, a small smile played along his face – she had grown so, so much – was all he could think.

"No …," she sighed firmly, kissing her lover's lips, falling head over heels in love with the twinkle of surprise she found in his eyes. "I live them … with you, every day," she sighed, watching his face light up. She smiled broadly. "When I say 'I love you', it's all encompassing … there is no single reason – I don't need to recite or to count the ways or reasons why I love you – I just do …," she confessed with a deep sigh.

Derek reached up moved his hands over hers, bringing her lips down to his where he kissed his woman, softly, tenderly … languidly … lapping at her mouth, kissing her on her words … her vows.

"Hmm, only the sum, the total package," he smiled, paying close attention to the happy sparkle in her eyes. "I live mine too … with you … every day … I really do," he professed, knowing he always would.

"So … I love you, all of you," Meredith giggled. "I can't survive without you," she sighed, knowing now that was the truth, for she had already tried that once … and look what happened … her fate … her destiny … stepped in. Her hand fell to the baby where she left it.

"And I love you, all of you," Derek chuckled. "And by all of you …," he laughed, ducking his head under the linens. "I mean you too," he muttered before pressing a chaste kiss to Meredith's fuller belly.

He heard Meredith's giggle fill the space above him – peeking up, he smiled broadly – knowing that they had exactly what they needed to survive …also knowing that if they found it, anyone could. For – true love – that love that transcended above all else to make itself known … had its own basic instincts for survival because in the end, love would conquer all.

And to that end, Derek knew they were poised for greatness – because that was all anyone ever needed – the love of a good partner, a well suited partner who understood what it took to make their partner tick – and in each other they found it – support, love, respect, admiration … the sum of the parts.

Chapter 20 to follow.