Ch 50 Time Goes By

Inuyasha wrote another letter to Sesshoumaru; telling him all about the evening and the fact that he was leaving with Grandmother for somewhere else, because of a ball or feast or something. He mentioned the kimono with the crested obi and he told him that he missed the sounds of the pups playing and his lessons in the afternoon. Then he signed off, after sending all his love and thoughts.

When they prepared to set off later that day, Inuyasha was amazed at the large trunk that had his name on it. He had not brought it with him; not had he enough things to fill it, or so he thought. But when he queried Grandmother, he was told that he would need more clothes for the times they would be away from the Palace. Inuyasha was not too happy that he was not allowed to take any of the things he had brought with him from the Western Lands, they would have to stay in his new rooms. He did however hide the scented mementos in the breast pocket of his new fire rat; which he was allowed to wear on the journey, along with his ball and the ribbons that he'd always carried on his person before.

Grandmother just raised her eyebrows at him, as she too caught the scents; but she didn't forbid him to take them, she was still rather taken aback at seeing him in the fire rat with Tetsusaiga. With his looks and the ensemble, he was reminding her greatly of his father; especially when he would turn and give her a shy smile. Although the days had long passed where she and her mate had been shy with one another; at Inuyasha's age, his father was still naive and a tad unsure. Suddenly the Lady was aware that Inuyasha had asked her a question and when it was repeated, she told him that they would be home before the new moon; she had remembered.

The journey was long and tedious for Inuyasha; cooped up in the carriage was not his idea of travel, he liked to run and jump using the strength and energy of his own legs. But apparently that was not the civilised way for Lord's and Ladies to arrive anywhere and now that Inuyasha was the younger Prince of the Western Lands, he had to learn decorum. This was just another thing he did not understand; to his eyes there was nothing more graceful and elegant than seeing his brother and Grandmother in their true forms soaring across the sky. She laughed at the image; but said that she too privately agreed with him, but that was the way their world worked and so he was sat with her, unless they travelled through the wilder land and then he could run outside.

The route they travelled was covering familiar ground to Inuyasha, as he and his group had covered most of Japan in their search for shards and Naraku; but he hadn't known at the time that there were so many concealed youkai strongholds around, hidden behind barriers of various sorts. The majority of high youkai kept well away from the human settlements, not advertising their presence; most had no need to have contact in any case. After a couple of days travel, they arrived at their destination and were soon settling into the suite of rooms provided.

At first Inuyasha was shown to the servants quarters, the mistake happening because he was helping to unload the baggage; another thing he did wrong apparently. He should have left it to the hired underlings; Grandmother shook her head indulgently at him when he was finally shown to his room, the host apologising profusely at a highly embarrassed hanyou. The host was not happy at being put into this position either, he was above such a lowly creature; but this fact only added to Grandmother's amusement.

It seemed usual in society that the early part of the day was wasted, as eveyone kept to their rooms in preparation for the long night of partying ahead. This did not suit the active hanyou; who once again got into potential trouble by exploring the grounds, running and jumping into the trees to see where he was. The Tiger Youkai who was the castle's owner had to quickly go to sort out the disturbance that Inuyasha had caused, disturbing his own routine. Inuyasha had been treed by some of the guards who were circling beneath, intimidating the boy with dire threats if he didn't come down.

He, of course was telling them what he would do to them should they make him angry, using the coarsest language he knew; this was only the first day too, Grandmother thought when the Tiger brought Inuyasha back personally to the Lady. He even commented that he hoped that she knew just what she had got into, by keeping the hanyou near to her. Inuyasha's ears were by now flat to his head, he was sure that he was in trouble with his Grandmother and he had truly wanted to please her and not be a disappointment.

But Grandmother was smiling and she gave him a most welcome hug, petting his hair and scratching the base of his ears making them perk upright again.

"You my dear Little Hanyou, are going to be such a breath of fresh air to all the old stuffy creatures you are going to meet; I am going to be vastly amused."

"Feh!" He crossed his arms and Grandmother laughed. In the afternoon, she had arranged for him to be able to work off some energy by sparring with some of the Tiger's trainers; this served several purposes apart from keeping the boy occupied. It also showed anyone who would be watching, that Inuyasha was a most able swordsman and that the tales of his deeds were not exaggerated; in case anyone got ideas about eliminating him and there would be many younger guests who would be entranced at seeing the young and handsome hanyou, excercising.

It worked out better than she had hoped; Inuyasha had soon collected quite a crowd, as once again his fame preceded him. Soon an impromptu sparring contest was taking place between the younger males, while the females were the most encouraging of spectators. Inuyasha had fun, once he'd got over the suspicion that they were really after his blood and his surprise that his hanyou status didn't seem to matter to these younger youkai. In fact he was the star of the show, because even though all the youkai were thoroughly trained; Inuyasha had the benefit of experience and his unique moves were greatly appreciated by his audience.

He also endeared himself to many of them, male and female by his modesty; he was not showing off in arrogance, merely demonstrating and was genuinely surprised at the interest he generated. The time went by quickly and soon, parents were heard calling to their offspring and the crowd began to disperse; but not before they all made arrangements to see one another at the ball and agreed to come to the training grounds again the next day. When Inuyasha came back to his rooms, Grandmother was pleased to see the sparkle in his eyes and the flushed cheeks around the happy smile and she listened gladly to his news as he got himself ready for the evening ball.

Once again, their entrance was seen by all as they came through the doors, Inuyasha in midnight blue silk and the Lady in a sky blue and silver. They were a beautiful pair and the compliments were many and loud. As were the murmers of how strange the idea was, that the result of a mate's indiscretion was now the escort of the widow. Inuyasha's ears burned at some of the things he was overhearing, but Grandmother smiled and ignored any crass remark that came her way. She was proud to introduce her Grandson, sometimes explaining how he came to be in that role and sometimes not; but by the end of the meal, all knew who Inuyasha was if they hadn't to start with.

The dancing was strange and new to Inuyasha; at first he wouldn't join in, prefering to stand near the wall if Grandmother had been whisked away by someone to talk or to dance. She knew so many people and was laughing and joking gently with everyone it seemed. But towards the middle of the dancing, a little group of youngsters came over to speak to him. They were some of those he'd met earlier in the day and were friendly and soon they were all joking and starting to dance together, pulling Inuyasha along and showing him what to do. Grandmother watched all the goings on from the corner of her eye and smiled secretly to herself; she too would be writing a letter of her own to Sesshoumaru.

That evening was exciting for Inuyasha, he had made new friends which was something he hadn't thought possible and the time had gone quickly; but the night was long and lonely still and he was tucked into a huge futon with none of his own belongings near except the scented keepsakes and he longed to feel the closeness of his family around. Grandmother had missed nothing that happened and as she sat to write her letter to her son; she made sure to include the fact that although Inuyasha was himself still oblivious to the fact, many of the girls were flirting with him and he was having a good time.

The rest of that visit went well for Inuyasha, the group of younger youkai were often together and there were picnics and games during the days and lantern lit garden dances in the evenings. Sometimes the older youkai would join in to see the enjoyments and to keep a parental eye on the goings on and several invites were given to him to visit his new friends at their own homes. Inuyasha didn't quite believe in these invites; but Grandmother said that he would be attending some of them anyway, as she too was going. But it was now time for them to return to her own home, the new moon was not far off and she had promised Inuyasha that he would be safe under her roof when the time came.

As they reached home early in the morning, after several days of more stuffy travelling; Inuyasha could feel his youki start to wane, he would lose it gradually until he was completely human and he hated it every time. He was more grumpy and moody with everyone, eventually hiding himself in his room and staying there; Grandmother wisely left him alone. Inuyasha sat up all night, as he used to do everytime he was human and in a strange place or on his own; but it had been a few years now since he had done so. His family all knew of course, his night of mortality and he had been able to sleep normally tucked up with the others; however he was on his own now, Grandmother wouldn't draw any attention to him by changing her own routine to accomodate his.

After the novelty and excitement of his time away, he felt crushed being human; how many of his new friends would want to be near him if they knew of this? He realised that Sesshoumaru would say true friends would not mind or care and he also knew that to be true; after all it didn't matter to Sango, Miroku, Shippou or his family anymore.

But he was lonely still, he couldn't scent his keepsakes and he was jumping at shadows because none of his senses worked properly; plus to cap it all, he was homesick again.

He imagined them all in the Western Palace, having their meal and the stories for the small pups; then the gentle and soft whisperings as they all settled down for the night and before they went to sleep, Rin's giggles, Kagura's quiet laugh and finally Sesshoumaru's firm 'enough now, time to sleep pups.' Safety and love together, so precious and he would never take it for granted; no one could ever really know the complete depth of Inuyasha's gratitude that he now had all that and he really missed them all.

The lump that had been growing in his throat was threatening to choke him and his eyes burned harshly; but he pushed them away and decided to pass some time by writing to his brother. That would allay the feeling of being so far apart. His writing told of the friends he had been so surprised to make and the invitations to visit; of the grandeur he had seen and the boring journey by carriage and horse, instead of by foot and tree. The tears he didn't realise had fallen to the paper, told his brother of the lonely night of humanity and the heavy heart missing his loved ones.

The night passed and the dawn returned, as did his youki; Inuyasha revelled in the strength of his power and senses once again and as always he was ready for his breakfast. The letter to Sesshoumaru had already gone; taken from outside his door where he had left it to be retrieved. At the morning meal, there was a letter and a small parcel for him; it was the first time anyone had written to him ever and although he knew it was from home, he couldn't have been more pleased and with permission he took it to his rooms to read.

There were loving messages from Kagura and Rin, telling of the things that were happening and how well the pups were growing; new things they said and did, little things that Papa wouldn't think to write. Sesshoumaru's letter was more formal but still managed to convey warmth of feeling; admonishing him to heed Grandmother's advice at all times, but reminding him too that should he wish, he only had to say to come home. Also enclosed were scribbles done by the twins and a picture from Yuki that he had signed and was of him and Uncle Yassa playing with orange snowballs. Finally in the package was another painting done by Rin, of the whole family including himself; neatly framed to match his other one. She had merely written on a slip of paper with it; 'we miss you'.

Finally the fragile barrier broke and Inuyasha flung himself face down on his cushion and sobbed loudly; he couldn't stop it though he tried, he had bottled everything up for some time and could hold on no longer. The simple messages so full of love, cut through his heart like a knife and he wished he was home; but he had already determined that he would not let Grandmother down and he would not ask to go home before the year was up. But it was a long time before his tears stopped; even after the storm had passed, they flowed without letup.

Though he felt better once he had himself under control and the hard lump in his throat had gone, he didn't feel confident enough just yet to leave his room and he couldn't look at his messages again without his eyes starting to leak. No one had come near him or his rooms, the Palace seemed empty so he didn't feel guilty or embarrassed that he'd disturbed the normal tranquility by his uncontrolled outburst of sadness. In fact it was several hours later that he heard someone come and slide open his door; Grandmother had brought his tea to him personally and joined him at his table.

"Do you feel better now my Little One? May I see your letters? Perhaps we could share, I too have some of my Grandpup's artwork."

"Of course. ...How did you know?" Then he felt stupid, of course she would know; she could smell the salt still heavy in the air, where they had saturated into his cushion. She smiled and went to get a damp cloth to bathe Inuyasha's face.

"You left a few clues. But besides, you had just received a letter from home and you are homesick; you have been swallowing your sorrow and all it needed was a trigger and two plus two make four. I left you alone so that you could feel less inhibited. Do not feel bad about it, I am a mother; I know these things."

"Sessh was never so weak as me."

"It is not weakness to miss those you love and who love you and Sesshoumaru is no different in that respect. There was one time when he and his friend Shingi left home for the first time to train on campaign. They were a long way from home and both were positively miserable for the first couple of months. All the boys were at one point or another and even your Father wrote a tearful letter to his mother when he was young and it was his turn to be sent away; so there is no shame, do you understand?" The Lady was touched as Inuyasha came and gave her a hug and kissed her cheek, he had never been so bold before; always needing to be invited to do so.

The time passed; but even though she had promised to take him home for visits, they did not come about as there was always somewhere else they had to be. Over the months there were more balls and picnics; more visits to old friends further afield and more time on the road. There had had to be a compromise too over Inuyasha's vulnerable time and Grandmother had entrusted the care of Inuyasha to her chief bodyguard on the moonless nights; as more than once, they were too far from the Palace to reach home in time.

Life was a social whirl and Inuyasha became proficient at dancing and understanding that words could be powerful. He had always known that words could hurt but he learned to listen to how things were said not just what was said. He was becoming popular; even having a wicked sense of humour ,as he was very observant and not just with the younger crowd who he kept meeting and could now be called friends. Their parents too had grown to accept the unpolished young hero and the whispers and innuendos were far fewer now; to all intents and purposes he was the Grandson of the Lady.

There were a couple of the girls who he really liked and who liked him right back; they were fun to be with and good at introducing the still shy hanyou to anybody new, that he met. Although he was not aware of it completely, he knew that he was considered attractive; realising that some were drawn to him because of that and not because of who he was. But his former life had taught him to not be fooled by beauty and his feet were firmly planted in the knowledge, that it was more important to be loyal and truthful rather than handsome. He remembered the hanyou Jinenji who although not the most good looking of creatures was kind and considerate to a fault; compared to some of the most beautiful youkai who had been the most cruel, Sesshoumaru among them in the past.

The letters that he sent back were now full of details about his life and Sesshoumaru could tell that Inuyasha was becoming more self assured and self accepting, for which he was grateful; but he was not being spoiled and that too, his brother was thankful for. It was difficult for him to not have the input he had become used to with Inuyasha and the whole family missed the boy; but he felt the loss most keenly, having taken him under his wing as he should always have done, Sesshoumaru's instincts just wanted his pup back.

However for all the light and glory that was Inuyasha's life now, there was also a dark side that he had told to no one. Four or five times now around the moonless night, Grandmother had been away for a few days. This was to take away suspicion from the new moon and also she thought that Inuyasha didn't always wish to go with her to her more local friends. But someone had found out, someone who hated him and came in disguise; knowing that his senses didn't work as well, someone who pulled the human boy from his rooms to the woods and beat him badly then left him, where any scent of tears or blood would dissipate in the air and be gone long before the Lady returned.

In the morning he would heal; the damage was designed to hurt, more than cause lasting damage as the youkai was careful to only use his fists. Then Inuyasha would return and act as though nothing had happened; it was nothing new to him and he just assumed that he was resented for some reason. The bullying youkai always told him to go back where he had come from, before slapping his face brutally and leaving him. He would not go whining to Grandmother and give the youkai the satisfaction of knowing that he had won; Inuyasha had his pride, besides he had always coped alone before.

TBC