A/N: Ok, time to be honest. I feel bad! Like... really bad! And you know what I realized? This is the only place I feel safe. Here I can feel the love and support I need now. Thank you to all of you who are beside me now and I can't stop saying that you are the awesome readers! You are the best!
P.S. English is not my first language, but I'm really trying here. So, if you think that it's hard for you to read - just don't read it! The reason I'm in this alone it's because I have updates every day. I love my readers and I want to pleased them in that way.
Rating: T (maybe M(or R) for some chapters, but we'll see);
Story:
Rory comes back to Stars Hollow to try and pick up the pieces of her ruined life. But she is not the only one who want to do that. Jess is there too, but he is not the same.
Note: This and the following few chapters are really hard for me to write. They hit too close to home for some reason. I hope you'll like them and review them as well. Thanks for your support and I always tell to my friends that you guys are awesome! Thanks and please keep reading. This is Jess' POV about how the things happened to Rory. Please, enjoy!
Chapter 51 I'll follow you
Jess walked out of the house early in the morning. Rory was still sleeping. He called Lorelai to come to her and then headed to the hospital. He had left a note to Rory that he was about to go and hire some stuff for the bookstore. He had lied, but he could not take it anymore. It was the second night in a row and Rory could not sleep. She told him that was only the kicking. Jess just nodded and acted as he was about to fall asleep. He acted as if he was in a deep slumber. But he lied to her again. Jess could not fall asleep when she was in pain. And she was and she could not hide it.
He knocked on the door of her doctor and Doctor Mathews answered him.
"Jess?" He looked at him with surprise. "I thought you'd be here the next week."
"I'm alone." Jess frowned. "Can I speak with you?"
"If it's about Rory, you know that I can't do that." Doctor Mathews shook his head. "It's confidential and I can't…"
"Listen!" Jess interrupted him impatiently. "I don't give a shit about all this! All I want to know is how bad she is! And don't tell me she is okay, because I have eyes on my face and I can see damn well that something is happening to her!"
"Jess…"
"I know she has an anemia." Jess interrupted him again. "I want to know how serious that is now! And I want you to tell me!"
"I really can't!"
"You're seriously getting on my nerves now!" Jess clenched his fists and put them in the pockets of his jacket. "She is bad second night in the row and she is in pain! I'm not gonna stay there and do nothing to help her!"
"She is in pain?" Doctor Mathews rubbed his chin. "That changed some things!"
"What things?" Jess frowned even more. "Speak!"
"I think she might go in a premature labor." Doctor Mathews shook his head. "And that is really dangerous right now – for her and for the baby."
"What?" Jess lost his voice for a moment. He swayed as if someone had punched him in the gut. "What are you talking about?"
"It happens with this stage of the anemia she has." Doctor Mathews looked down at Rory's file. "I thought that she would influence of the new medications."
"I have to go back to her." Jess murmured and turned to leave.
"Call me if she gets contractions." Doctor Mathews stopped him. "And… you don't have to move her! If she is in pain… just call me, but avoid any movements, okay?"
"Okay." Jess nodded and rushed out of the room.
When he reached to his home and heard Lorelai's voice, he frowned. Rory just explained to her about her anemia. Why the hell, she had not told him? Maybe she did not trust him enough or more likely, she wanted to protect him. Jess clenched his jaw and leaned on the wall. She would always try to protect him even when he had told her that she could not.
"And you put your life into danger, just because of this?" Lorelai increased her voice and Jess clenched his fists. "Rory!"
"It's okay mom." Rory tried to comfort her mother. "Mom, please!"
"Hey!" Jess rushed into the room just in that moment. "I called you to make her company, not to upset her!" He shot a look to Lorelai.
"Because she is so stubborn damn it!" Lorelai snapped. "If you only knew…"
"I know!" Jess frowned. "That's why you should've been more careful!"
"What?" Lorelai was about to burst. "She is my daughter, Jess! Are you telling me that I don't know my daughter?"
"Well, you don't look supportive of her now, do you?" He hissed.
"Jess." Rory tried to intervene.
"Are you kidding me?" Lorelai was furious.
"Mom!" Rory tried once again.
"The level of my sense of humor is ridiculously low when it comes to Rory!" Jess growled. "Ask her if you don't believe me!"
"You little…"
"Stop it!" Rory raised up her voice enough to get some attention. "Both of you! Just shut up now!" She coughed and leaned back on the pillows. "I'm not in the mood to play judge here!"
"I'm sorry, hun!" Lorelai rushed to her daughter, but Jess stood on his place.
"I'm going to put some things in the fridge." He scoffed and left the room. But he leaned back on the wall outside the room. His thoughts were a giant mess. His ears rang and he tried to contain his anger. He was so pissed off right now, but the only person he could blame was himself. That was the saddest truth. He was responsible for Rory's condition. Jess realized that now. He was the only one that everyone should blame if something happened to her.
"Mhm!" Her painful moan made him shiver.
"Rory!" Lorelai rose up her voice.
"I think… he's moving now." Rory released her breath in jogs. "Just… hurts!"
"I'm here." Jess walked in the room just in this moment. He crawled over the bed and sat close to her. Rory settled in his arms. "Give me a towel from the bathroom." Jess looked up at Lorelai.
"Okay." Lorelai agreed quickly and hid in the bathroom. She came back few seconds later with the clean towel and handed it to Jess. He took it and pressed it to Rory's sweat face. She sighed under his touch, but after that moaned painfully again and grabbed her stomach. "What?" Lorelai looked at Jess.
"Call her doctor." Jess clenched his jaw. "I think that was a contraction!"
"What?" Lorelai looked terrified. "What are you talking about?"
"Don't argue with me! Just do it!" Jess carefully laid Rory back on the bed. "It's okay!" He mumbled and stroked her hair. "Just stay like this, don't move and everything would be okay."
"OW!" Rory screamed and grabbed her stomach. Her body arched and she breathed heavily. "No! No! No!" She gasped. "Jess!"
"I'm here!" He took her hand and looked at her. "Just breathe, okay?"
"I called." Lorelai came back in the room. "He told me that he would be here shortly." Rory moaned again and Lorelai rushed to her daughter. She touched her forehead and Jess handed her the towel. "Thanks!" Lorelai looked up at him. "If she is so bad, why we didn't take her to the hospital?"
"Her doctor told me not to move her." Jess flinched with Rory's next moan. Lorelai pressed the towel to her sweat forehead. "Rory, please just listen to me." Jess gulped down his fear and tried to look strong before her. "The doctor will be here soon. Just stay strong, okay?"
"No!" Rory squeezed his hand. "I don't wanna lose him, Jess!" She cried and his heart bled in this moment. He wanted to run. "I don't want to lose our boy! No!" Her body shook again.
"I'm sorry." Jess whispered and his lips touched the back of her fingers. "I'm so sorry to put you through this! It's my fault! Only mine!"
"No!" Rory breathed out and squeezed his hand. "It's… not your fault!" She bit her lower lip and suppressed her next moan. "Jess! Do you hear me? Not… your… fault!"
"Shh-shh now." Jess shook his head. "Save your strength, okay? I would never forgive myself if something happens to you, because of me." His voice cracked. "Never!"
"Jess!" She cried just in the moment when Lorelai's phone rang. She looked at the number and rushed out of the room.
"It's okay." Jess stroked Rory's hair. "It's okay! Doctor Mathews is here."
Rory screamed once again and her body relaxed in his arms. Jess was sure that he was losing her and he was ready to follow her.
