BlackLynx17: It is the chapter you all have been waiting for! Well this and the next chapter! Meet part one! Part two will be later!

SPOILERS! So I was going to make Lucy's secret something else, but during the Celestial spirits arc with Yukino fighting with her BARE HANDS and kicking MAJOR ASS I decided to go with this. She was so cool and more useful than Lucy, I couldn't believe it.

AAA Chapter 53


I babbled, words caught on my tongue in front of my picture of Natsu on my phone before I just collapsed on my bed and said forget it. I couldn't do this, I couldn't even do this to a picture of Natsu! How, how... ugh! I glared at my dresser and rolled towards it, opening one of its drawers and pulling out a small handkerchief from it.

I want to tell Natsu the truth, I want to tell him so badly, I love him too much though. I don't, I want... oh why did those friends of mine have to notice who I was? I never lost completely contact with them, but just for Romeo to see and tell Natsu! Well I was the one who told Natsu, he probably believes I hang out with gangsters now! That wasn't... that wasn't the truth. He laughed, knowing Natsu he's probably forgotten, but I haven't.

He's willing to give me time, he said he'd give me all the time in the world until I am ready. This isn't right though. I needed to tell him. I was going to tell him... I didn't know how though.

"Why can't my life be like an anime?" I groaned.

My life wasn't like an anime though... my head slowly lifted up from my pillow. It wasn't like an anime, but more like a... a manga. I jumped off my bed and ran to my bookcase, looking for my Gentleman's Alliance series. When I first read this I laughed so hard, it was ridiculous. After my meeting with Natsu though, this became my guidebook. It became my guide to Natsu and to his love. So maybe, maybe this could be Natsu's guide to the truth. Yes.

"I don't have to tell him, this manga can remind him." I said looking down at the first volume.

Was I ready to take such a big leap though? Yes. It's been far too long. The months we've been together have been great, but if I really want this to last then I need to tell him the truth.

"Natsu, I need to see you."


"I have this vacancy in my heart, there's always something that's tearing me apart. I don't know why I ever let you go, now I have no one to bear... with me." I sang softly.

"You always did love that song, didn't you Lucy Lu?"

"Yukino, what are you doing here? I thought I told you last visit that I don't want you near me unless you're dressed properly." I glared lightly.

Yukino giggled and jumped off the brick wall, spinning around to show me her skinny black jeans and ripped tank top, "what are you talking about? I am dressed pro-per-ly. It's you who isn't dressed in dress code, Lucy Lu."

"And stop calling me that, I've abandoned that name. I'm Lucy now." I said with my chest out.

"I remember, Lu-cy. I've just missed you, that's all. Sure we talk, and we text, but not once have you ever accepted my invites out to actually meet each other. Last week was the first time we met up in months."

"I think you mean ambushed." I mumbled.

"What was that?"

"I said, because you always invite me out on certain activities I'm not apart of anymore."

"Oh I see, Lucy Lu is too cool to hang out with her old buddies. I get you, once you got the man of your dreams there's no reason to have friends around anymore."

"You know it isn't like that... Yuki Yuki."

"AW LUCY-LU!" Yukino giggled and jumped on me.

I laughed as well and hugged her back, giving her kisses on the cheeks.

"I really do miss you Yukino, along with everybody else, but-"

"I know, I know, you've changed. You always know you can come back whenever you want though, right? I don't know about being leader again, but lackey can fit you just nicely."

"Hahaha, very funny Yukino."

"And we always have your back, especially me if the girls are still sour. Is that dreamboat of yours treating you badly? Because if he is just say the word."

I sighed lightly and Yukino took a step back away from me, giving me a look.

"He... he isn't doing anything bad to you... is he?"

"No, it's me who's doing the badness."

"Aw Lucy Lu, come on. Let's talk about it and reconnect, my treat." Yukino grinned holding up a wallet that I knew for a fact that wasn't hers.

I reached for it and opened it up, "don't you mean Ren Tachibana's treat?"

"Tomato, to-mah-to, just come on girly."

"I can't, I'm supposed to call Natsu when I make it home safely since he had something to do with his dad after school and-"

"Lucy-Lu, you are coming with me right this instant or else I'm calling up the old gang and we're kidnapping you."

I pouted, my eyes narrowing lightly, "what place?"


"So all you're scared about is how you met him? Lucy Lu, you've gotten weak. I take back that invitation to rejoin us." Yukino said with her nose up.

"Shut up. Yukino, he's... he's different. I really love him, he made me a better person. I don't think he's ever dealt with something like this and if I tell him, I'm afraid he'll think I'm a barbarian."

"Lucy Lu, you are an idiot. While I'm worrying about real shit like surviving, you're worrying about if your boyfriend will break up with you just because you used to be in a tiny gang."

"Our gang wasn't tiny! We had like fifty people! We did horrible, illegal things Yuki Yuki!"

"And announce that to the world, will you?!"

I quieted down in my seat and sipped at my soda.

"Lucy Lu, if you aren't going to tell him then just forget about how you met him and start believing in what you told him. I don't believe you met him in that bad of a way though, I think it's kind of cute, but since this is really worrying you then let's really think about it. He's already seen you at his lowest and accepted you, helped you even, so why are you afraid that he won't like you anymore?"

I started at my drink, my fingers knotting together. "I know I'm being silly and making a big deal, gosh I'm such an idiot. I just, my past is just what I want it to be. I don't want Natsu to know anything about my scars."

"Lucy, those scars helped you meet him and be who you are today. If he doesn't like you for who you are, scars and all, then he's the one who needs to change. You've done your changing, it's his turn now." Yukino said reaching for my hands.

I nodded, "I know, I know. Thanks Yukino, you always did beat some sense into me. Glad to see you can do it without physically harming me now," I smirked at her.

"Glad to help Lucy Lu, you owe me one now."

I snorted, "Ple-ase, like hell I do. Must I bring up all the favors you owe me?"

"Hey, once you quit the gang you lose those favors."

The two of us started laughing and I smiled, squeezing Yukino's hands tightly.

"Thank you Yukino. I'll tell him."

"Today, matter of fact right now. The sooner he breaks your heart the sooner you'll be on the streets."

I rolled my eyes, though my insides were racing. Yukino glared at me and started dragging me to the door.

"I'm being serious!"

"I can't just go over though!"

"Yes you can! We are doing this now!"

"Wait, wait, I'm not going to tell him!"

"Lucy!"

"No, wait! I have something that will make him remember. I was going to give it to himself instead and then talk to him." I confessed.

Yukino stopped her tugging and sighed, "still the coward. Alright, as long as you tell him something. Do you have this trinket or do we have to pick it up?"

I bit my bottom lip, "I have it."

"Good, now where does this Natsu fellow live? I have a meeting to go to that I do not want to be fashionably late too."


"Hey Lucy, so what's up?" Natsu asked grinning brightly at me.

I bit my bottom lip and turned around, seeing Yukino behind a bush glaring at me. I turned back to Natsu and scratched the back of my head.

"You're home." I announced, secretly hoping that he wouldn't be.

"Yeah, Dad just needed help moving things out of his office. I was just going to call me, so what's up? Why didn't you call me earlier when you got home?"

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, "Natsu... I'm not going to see you for a while." I decided to start.

His eyes widened when I said those words, hurt appearing on his face, "wha- but why? What did I do this time?"

"No, it's nothing you did, but me. I've been keeping something from you Natsu and just... well here it is." I said holding out a handkerchief to him.

Natsu stared confusingly at it as he grabbed it from my hands, raising an eyebrow.

"Uh? What is this?"

"This is a clue to what I'm keeping form you, because I don't have enough courage to tell you. I... until you remember Natsu, please just give me some time to myself."

"Lucy, this is ridiculous! Just tell me, I won't care! I love you." He said.

"And that's what makes it worse, because of my lie I tricked you into loving me. I'm not who you think I am Natsu." I started crying.

"No, no, Lucy, Lucy. Shh," He whispered wiping my tears away with his handkerchief, "if you aren't my Lucy, then who are you?" He asked in a sweet way.

I hiccuped and giggled lightly, "I'm Haine."

Natsu blinked and I tore myself away from him, running down his driveway and past Yukino. I don't know if she was following after me immediately or not, or if Natsu was, but I kept running until I felt that I was safe.

I collapsed on a bench and just sat there, hands in my eyes as I cried into them. A few minutes later someone sat next to me and an arm wrapped around me.

"He's going to still love you Lucy Lu, stop being such a drama queen about it." Yukino mumbled.

"The only reason he said yes to me was because I told him that made up story with him being a hero saving me! It was all a lie Yukino! He thinks I'm this cute, adorable, perfect girl, but he's wrong. And now he's going to know he's wrong and just, just.." I started shaking my head again as I leaned against her shoulder.

"I'll be your shoulder to cry on just this one Lucy Lu, because I owe you, but if you ever cry in front of me and appear weak again after this I'm going to kick your ass. Tears do not suit a legend like you."

I giggled through my tears and clung to Yukino. Natsu. I'm sorry I lied to you. I just wanted you to like me, I just wanted you to love me. That's still all I want. To be with you. I've changed so much for you, so please accept me for who I am now. Please, say you still love me.


*All About Anime Club Status*
*By Wendy Marvell*

Club Authorization:
OFFICIAL!

Members Have:
President- Wendy Marvell
Vice President- Romeo Conbolt
2nd Vice President - Natsu Dragneel
Treasurer - Gray Fullbuster
Secretary - Juvia Lockster
Personal Chef - Lucy Heartfilia
First Official Senior - Laxus Dreyar
First Official Fanboy - Freed Justine
Manga Keeper - Levy McGarden
Wonder Titania - Erza Scarlet
Cool and Spicy - Gajeel Redfox
Ex-Anime Club President! - Mirajane Strauss

Friendship Level:
I still don't know.

Real Names Rank:
1st) W-E-N-? _ ?
2nd) M _ ? _


Anime Used:

The Gentlemen's Alliance Cross - Mentioned

X'amd's Lost Memories - Mentioned