Chapter Fifty-three

Allura felt relief for the first time all day when the doors to her room opened to reveal Romelle. Elinor her seamstress wrapped up her measuring tape and nodded. "I have all I need, Princess. I should be ready for the first fittings in three days," she said, as she gathered up the fabric, curtsied Romelle hello and goodbye and left the room.

"Blue?" Romelle questioned.

"It's my favorite color," she revealed to her cousin. "I out grew pink a long time ago."

"A lot of us do, some of us don't," she smiled. "This means I can wear pink to the Ball, then?"

"Of course."

Romelle smiled. "I'll have to contact my maid on Pollux, have her send me my favorite dress, so it'll arrive in time to have it taken out. I think I'm already starting to expand outward."

Allura moved forward and pressed a hand against her cousins stomach which still gave nothing away to the unaware showed a slight rounding. "How does it feel?"

"I feel the same still, still experiencing so morning sickness during the afternoons and evenings. Nanny's crackers help, however and she's gotten less disapproving the more she hears about our wedding plans. I do hope you will be my Maid of Honor, Allura."

"I'd love too, Romelle, you know that, we've discussed this. I'll be there, I'll do whatever it is you need."

"Who should Sven asked to be his Best Man?" Romelle asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, traditionally on Pollux, the Maid of Honor and the Best Man are a couple too. They follow the bride and groom down the aisle, they are in a place in their relationships where they do declare their love and hope that our love helps enforce and reaffirm theirs. As their newer love reminds us of where we started. Sven was certain you and Keith would be okay with it, but... Allura last night?"

Allura blushed, her heart sped up as she remembered her legs wrapping around Lance's waist, how she'd ground down against him as the wall slammed against her back. How she never wanted to stop licking into his mouth the way she'd been at that moment, it'd been delicious and it'd been a beginning and they'd been stopped.

Always stopped, she thought and she sighed because it was a good thing even if she didn't like it happening. Lance and her had to talk, they had so much to figure out and she had Keith to deal with, to figure out. Her feelings hadn't stopped, her heart had been so set and devoted to Keith for so long. Did she walk away because one time, when she'd pushed him so far it hadn't...

"Romelle, before Sven, before... I mean were their Princes' that your father introduced you to?" she asked her cousin, Romelle was older than her by a few years. Pollux due to her father's dealings with Zarkon for a few years had been safe for a few years of the Doom war. Romelle could, Allura hoped have more experience than herself.

"Yes. Three. I met the first one when I was fourteen, he was fifteen. We both thought it was the worst thing that could happen to us that day," Romelle laughed. "We became friends. Years later, when he was coming to the planet again, I looked forward to seeing him again. I let him kiss him and was so disappointed."

Allura lifted her hands and waved them to prompt Romelle to keep going, this was good. It was as if Romelle knew exactly what she needed to hear.

"The other two Princes had been, well they were arrogant, and too confident, I'd find them handsome and interesting. Spoiled, and awful men. As most of them are, I'm sure you've seen," Romelle explained.

Allura sighed. "Unfortunately, yes."

"Romas wasn't. He was still the way I remembered him at fifteen, when I was eighteen and he was nineteen. We were both so happy to see each other again. We snuck off the first change we got from our chaperone. He held my hand and we walked under the trees into the woods by the Castle. I stood against a tree trunk, he told me I was so beautiful and he kissed me. My first real kiss, I told myself, not like the icky ones those slimy princes had snuck in on me when I hadn't wanted one. And it was... it was a kiss. I'd expected something more. He felt it too, the nothing. We both looked at each other and tried again. Then again. Nothing. We've remained friends, he's so happy I found Sven. He'll be at the wedding with his young bride, a sweet young lady from his planet."

Allura took in the story. "So, you just felt nothing? At all?"

Romelle nodded. "It was a bit like when I kiss Bandor goodnight to be honest."

"Oh," Allura said, thinking about when she kissed Pidge and Hunk on the cheek. "Huh."

Romelle grabbed Allura by the arm and pulled her to the bed and sat them both down. "It looked like you thought that story would help and it turned out not too at all. What is it?"

"I always feel something when Keith kisses me," Allura said as she thought it, then realized she hadn't meant to say it out loud. "I mean. Oh, this is hard."

"This is about him and Lance?"

"Yes. No. It's about me and Keith, and it might be connected to Lance and me. I'm confused."

"Between them?"

Allura shook her head. "I want to say no, I'm not confused between them, but I am. Yet, I'm not... I think. I want to be sure, I can't make this choice lightly, Romelle. And there are things I'm confused about, they are the only men I've ever touched."

"I know. I haven't been with many myself. A few awful kisses from spoiled princes, Romas and then of course Sven."

"Romas is like Bandor to you though. The others. They weren't... allowed."

Romelle nodded.

"Keith was my Prince. The one of my heart. He came to Arus and he pulled everything together. He pulled them together, especially when Sven was injured, he kept them together and he helped me join them. He kept saving me and he helped save my people. I know it wasn't only him but he stood out with his eyes and his nobility. He reminded me of my father, Romelle. The way he carries himself, he's so graceful and he's prideful and quiet. We think alike, and we have the same ideals. I was hooked from day one, I was so sure. It was Keith, he'd be my future. I'd find a way to make sure of it and it was clear to me he felt something more back as well. He was afraid to say it. Lance verified it, he told me, he told Keith felt something he just wasn't sure if I was ready, if the time was right. Lance, Arusian Gods, Romelle, it's insane. Lance helped me to make the first move, to go to Coran, to ensure that I start to date Keith. Lance held my hand as I came up with my speech to Coran. He listened to me yammer about Keith for hours..." Allura looked down and started to twist at the fabric of her bedspread.

"What changed, Allura?"

"Nothing, everything," Allura laughed. "Not a thing changed with Keith, Romelle. That's the thing. Keith is still Keith to me. A hero, brave and noble. A Prince among men, a true Prince. If I had the authority to Crown him I would. He's Keith. He's dependable, solid and now I realize, a perfectionist, way to prideful with a jealous streak. He's aggravating and he's too rational sometimes. He over thinks and over thinks, unless he's fighting or in battle. That's the only time he instantly trusts his instincts. Which are pure and good. Being with him, it was amazing, Romelle. He was my first kiss, my first date, my dream man was my first kiss," Allura smiled.

"I always got so lightheaded and warm, around him. Everything was great, and I learned a lot. We got closer physically but never too close, he's too noble not to follow the rules he laid out with Coran. And you know the rules, must be a virgin. And I never felt a need to speed up anyway, I never felt a rush. Holding his hand, touching his cheek, kissing him before I knew what it was like to french kiss him could have satisfied me for years. But I learned about the french kissing because he slipped - because I turn him on. And I learned I turn him on because I learned what it's really like to need more from Lance."

"Lance? What did he do?"

"He did nothing wrong? If anything I crossed the line. He was hallucinating. He never, he never would have told me he was in love with me otherwise, Romelle. And I think, I think he wanted one kiss, and thought I'd said yes. I don't know but suddenly we were kissing in the cave and it was..." Allura blushed, she looked back at the bedspread. Her skin felt on fire, she felt shaky again and a shiver ran up her spine. "I wanted to crawl into him, Romelle. We wouldn't have stopped if we hadn't run out of air, then we both kind of snapped back to ourselves. But then I asked him to kiss me again and it was... I couldn't stop thinking about it and he forgot it," Allura rolled her eyes.

"He did?"

"He said last night he remembers it as a dream, he was so out of it Romelle, so many hallucinations. I didn't know what to do, I tried to pretend it never happened but..."

"But."

"I wanted that feeling with Keith. And after feeling it with Lance, knowing how Lance responded to my touch, because he hadn't hid anything. I realized how much Keith wants me physically and I pushed it. He blames myself for the freakout I had about it, but I pushed it Romelle. Last night before me and Lance were in your room... I felt Keith against me for the first time and it... Felt..." Allura couldn't stop the tears that fell from her eyes as she had to use the only word that qualified. "Wrong."

"Wrong?"

"Wrong," Allura said, wiping at her eyes. "I froze, Keith started apologizing and talking about how this is why we need rules and shouldn't be so close. And sitting on his bed had been a bad idea and being in his room was worse. I said we'd go back to having Lance chaperone, which made him feel better. He kept apologizing for pushing me further than I was ready. But I pushed him and I'm ready... or I least I am when it's Lance. When Keith kisses me it's nice, it's warm and buzzy. But it's not..."

"Passion," Romelle said.

"No."

"And Lance?"

Allura blushed but she couldn't stop a smile, despite how awful she felt about Keith. "Things are always easier with Lance," she said. "I thought it was because I wasn't in love with him. Like training, I was always trying to prove myself to Keith. So Lance ended up a better teacher, nothing to prove, nothing to lose. Maybe it started that way, I don't know. But yes, it's more fiery."

"Allura, is it only passion? Because there can be passion without love."

Allura frowned, images of Lara all over Lance coming to her and she shook her head. "I know and no, Lance and I have something more than mere passion, Romelle. It's more than that, there are things you can't understand," she said, thinking about the future, thinking about the tattoos.

"Nanny saw my tattoo today."

Romelle's eyes widened. "You have a tattoo? Allura, you're a Princess!"

Allura laughed, thinking that she'd walked into the tattoo parlor in the future with a Princess, one who had three tattoos; it was a part of the future she liked. "I know. It's nothing major, everyone has over reacted. Keith thought Lance and I purposely got matching tattoos. We didn't but I wonder at our choice now hindsight."

"What do you mean?"

Allura moved back and moved the waist line of the spandex leggings she'd put on when she returned to her room, to show Romelle her lion. Romelle's eyes widened. Allura recalled how much her cousin had loved the artistry of Lance's tattoo and felt safe in the knowledge Romelle would recognize the same hand in her own.

"Allura the same person drew this, it looks painted on your skin the way his did. It's beautiful work, the detail is so similar... it maybe different lions but otherwise it is the same tattoo, in the same location on your bodies."

"I know. But Lance said if we'd wanted matching tattoos we'd have gotten each other's lions, to get us off the hook with Keith. But Keith, he was angry and upset. I don't think he or Coran believed that Lance hadn't been with me when I got mine. It's the truth, and we can't introduce Keith the artist."

"Why?"

"He's not here."

"Will he be back?"

"He'll be on Arus someday but not soon enough," Allura hedge.

Romelle reached out and touched Allura's face. "What is your hindsight about the tattoos, Allura, if Lance had nothing to do with yours?"

Allura shook her head and took hold of her cousins hand. "I can't tell you. You wouldn't believe me anyway."

Romelle arched an eyebrow. "Allura, you can tell me anything, trust me with anything."

Allura smiled. "I know, it's just... We were drawn to the same art. It was a painting of the artists. The lions flying in the Arusian night, in front of the full view of the third moon. We picked that painting the two of us, without the other knowing until it was done."

"Lots of people love the same art, Allura. I love it myself."

Allura nodded, thinking about other painting, with the moon and the lions further in the background. The painting with her in Lance's arms, looking up at him, her face caught in a moment of laughter and in love. Lance's hands gripping her waist the way he does seconds before he pulls her in for a kiss, his own face caught in the same expression.

Them.

She'd told herself it was the lion and the moonlit night she'd been choosing to immortalize on herself, but was it? At the time she walked into that tattoo parlor with Laurie, she knew Lance could make her laugh like nobody else. He made her giddy with it, dizzy with it sometimes, he could tickle her

fancy like no one else and it never let her get too serious for too long as she had a habit of doing sometimes. She never would have survived that trip to the future without his mirth.

"Allura?"

"I need to go," Allura said. Impatience filled her, she had to see Lance, talk to him. It'd been far to long of a day and they'd said goodbye so long ago and she hadn't even wanted too. "Lance is waiting," she stood up.

Romelle grabbed Allura's arm. "Allura, are you in love with him?"

"Lance?" Allura asked.

Romelle nodded.

"God, yes," Allura said, smiling, pulling her arm free and running out of her room, leaving a worried Romelle behind.

~~.~~

"Uh, hello?" Lance said, surprised to see the young red-headed maid that had told him Allura needed his help in the kitchen - only to walk into the middle of the Big Tattoo Debacle - on his and Allura's bench.

She'd been sitting on it, her knees up to her chin when he approached but on his greeting she jumped to her feet, looked at him but didn't quite reach his eyes. "I'm sorry, I just... uh. I had a break and this spot was pretty. Am I not allowed..."

"No, it's fine. It's just generally the maids stay out of Princess Allura's garden. This is her private area."

"Right, of course. I'm sorry, I won't... again... Commander..."

"Lance."

"Right," she said.

"You are?"

"Me, Uh, I'm Fleur," she stammered. "and again sorry, I should go. I'm sure Nanny has something for me to do. The Ball is a big deal, a lot of important people. Important planets are coming, the Princess will gain a lot of political clout and power if it goes well."

"I suppose. Seems to me Arus already has all the power it needs," Lance said.

"I was just repeating what I heard Advisor Coran say, sir."

"He wants to ensure Allura makes smart choices," Lance muttered, sitting down on the bench. "Tell me, who do you think is the smarter choice. A man like Captain Kogane, or me?"

"Sir?"

Lance laughed. "I mean, say I was in love Princess Allura and wanted to marry her, that I made my stand. Would I be a smart choice for her, for Arus?"

"You want my opinion" the young girl, who called herself Fleur asked.

"Why not?" Lance asked, looking at Allura's mother's White Arusian roses, thinking this was crazy. He wasn't the better choice, he wasn't a smart choice. He made insane chocies in battle, he thought there were no political choices to be made except to make one huge political stand. Work with Arus, for the betterment of the Galaxy or else. Peace was what was important, Arus held the location, Arus held Voltron. Allura's hand wasn't needed incentive for any planet to want broker a treaty or any kind of quid pro quo agreement with Allura. The clout was there, Arus was the golden planet of the Alliance, why else was the Garrison holding this Ball here, and now. It was a statement, war or no war, Arus was a power. How was he the only one who saw it, and if he was he only one who saw it maybe he was wrong. It was insane, Coran had been advising Alfor for years, he was the fifth or sixth in a generation of advisors. Keith studied political strategy in war, intergalactic politics, and he understood royal politics as well. Everyone said Keith had royal bearing about him - it'd been said before they ever landed foot on Arus.

"Well," he said, glancing at the girl again.

"I think the best choice for Arus, is the man the Princess wants, sir."

Lance laughed. "There is that," he said.

"I should go," she said again and this time ran off before he could stop her again. Lance watched her run for a moment, thinking there was something about her he couldn't really place his finger on. But then he heard footsteps from the other direction and he turned to find Allura standing there.

He stood up, closed the space between them and grabbed her hand. "Hey?"

"Hi," she whispered.

Lance didn't know where to start, or what to do. He wanted to kiss her, he wanted her in his arms, wrapped up in his body space with her smell and her curves pressed in against him. He wanted to ask her what the hell had happened in the cave, more specifically, he wanted to tell her again he loved her. He wanted to ask her if she loved him? He wanted to know what the hell this meant about Keith? Which brought guilt he didn't want to face, or deal with but knew would eat at him for a long time but he knew it would be worth if in the end he was with Allura.

"I needed to talk to with Romelle, or I would've been here sooner."

"Did it help?"

"Yes and no," Allura laughed, nervous and leaned her forehead against his chest.

Lance hand his hands down her back, then back up again. Then again, and again for something to do besides pull her in and kiss her senseless. "What happened with Keith last night?" he forced himself to ask.

"I felt him against me, his erection. I pushed him so it would happen, on purpose... You didn't remember what happened in the cave, I realized you wouldn't tell me you were love me because I was choosing Keith but I wasn't feeling - I wasn't feeling what I feel when I kiss you with Keith and I thought if I got our bodies close enough it would spark it to life. Only when I felt him against me it felt wrong, it felt wrong and I froze. And he's in the Castle now feeling like he crossed the line and it was all me."

Lance's heart stopped and started. This was awesome and horrible news, or it could be awesome news. He didn't want his hopes up, he didn't but his heart was soaring out into the air, flying high without his permission and starting to perform daredevil acts of happiness.

"What are you saying?" he asked, unable to hide the hope from his voice.

Allura looked up, her cheeks bright pink, her eyes bright. "I hate hurting him. He's Keith, he's my hero and I don't think he'll ever stop being my hero. But..."

Her words stung and yet hoped stayed there as beautiful as her face. "Yeah?"

"You, Lance. I'm in love you, I think I have been a long time now. You're the one I run too when I need to talk things out, you're my best friend, and you're really the only one who knows me. I don't know what to do about Keith?" she whispered. "All I do know is I love you."

Lance stared at her, he grabbed her face in his hands and started to dry tears that had fallen with his thumbs. He started to feel lightheaded, he felt her arms wrap around his neck and her lips grazed his right ear as she whispered, "Breathe."

Inhaling, he laughed, then his hands fell to her waist and he pulled her into him and caught her gaze. "I love you, Allura, I love you."

"I know," she smiled.

"Cocky, already?" he grinned.

"No, scared," she whispered.

"Don't be, we'll figure out the hard part" he said about Keith, then he erased the space between them and captured her lips with his.

I love this part. Lance heard in his head as Allura's legs wrapped around his waist again and as they had no wall nearby for him to steady them into. Lance decided to collapse them down to the grass, Allura on top of him.

Remind me, Baby, in the cave you were on top and I did I have my had my hands up your shirt like this and my...

Allura's laughter filled the air.