Ignorance is Bliss
Hotch slid silently into the seat across from Morgan. Although his eyes were closed and his headphones filled his ears with the music that was always his way of calming down after a case, he still felt, rather than saw, the unit chief's presence and opened his eyes. "What's up Hotch?"
Hotch looked around the aircraft. Rossi, JJ and Reid appeared to be sleeping. He couldn't be sure about Reid since he felt the young man sometimes closed his eyes to feign sleep thus avoiding a conversation with another team member. Blake turned the page of her latest book. "You were with him the most so I thought I'd ask; how was Reid?"
Hotch watched while the other man gathered his thoughts. "To someone who didn't know Reid, he'd appear fine. And he was as far as the work went. There was no problem there Hotch. It was just the little things we all know, and up until now, never thought we'd miss. I mean when has Reid said "close enough" when someone speculated the odds on something? Never, that's when, because Reid can figure these things out to the decimal point. When we found Katie's body, I didn't know the name of the river. Reid would have never let that pass. He'd have named it and given me all the statistics there were about it." Morgan looked back at his fellow teammates and leaned closer to Hotch and whispered. "I never thought I'd miss that. There were so many times when he gets on a ramble and I want to say, 'shut up already.' And now I'd give anything to hear him go into one of his diatribes. You know what they say, be careful what you wish for.
"That will come back in time Morgan." Hotch replied. "He's still not himself. I realize that. I just wanted to get your take on him in the field."
There were a few moments of silence and then Hotch spoke again. "At least he let you, Garcia and JJ help him with his apartment. It was good that he was communicating again and letting someone in."
"Oh yeah, that; I wondered if Reid did that more for us than for himself."
Hotch's eyebrows rose.
"I think he knew we wanted so much to do something for him so he threw us a bone if you will. Everybody felt better afterwards. Well we did; I don't know about him."
"He had the capacity to think of someone other than himself. That's a good thing. Often, at times like this, we do things to please others, not realizing that is also benefits us in the end."
"Hotch, if anyone would know, you would."
Hotch turned his face toward the window and watched his reflection in the night sky beyond. Knowledge was considered an asset but not all knowledge was welcome. He wished he didn't know quite so well how Reid was feeling and he'd have never wished that knowledge on his friend. Could there not be something that Reid didn't have to know about.
Morgan's voice brought him back from his reverie. "One thing I did notice when we had our weapons on Sera in the basement and I was trying to talk her into giving up her weapon; Reid looked so determined, more so than usual. I felt that if Sera had made one wrong move toward JJ or me he would have shot."
"Another woman holding a gun on someone he loves, I can see it. I think he may be that way for a while, protective of us. It'll lessen with time and he realizes we're okay."
"And how long until he's okay Hotch?" Morgan put his headphones back on and went back to listening to his music while Hotch stared at his reflection.
