You really didn't believe I would kill Chuck did you? I never meant for you to think that Chuck was dead. The whole point is that Sarah thinks he was dead. Like several reviewers have pointed out, I've already told you a couple of times that Chuck and Sarah survive. I've told you that they would have a son and name him Bryce Steven. I gave a flash forward a while back where Chuck, Sarah, Devon, Ellie, Casey, and Misty were all together in the future living happy, contented lives. That's why I did that. So I could cliff hang that Chuck is dead with no guilt, lol.

Warning: Just like the show, there are going to be significant character deaths still coming. (yes, still) I don't want to spoil any specific chapters so I'm going to post this warning in every chapter.

I don't own Chuck. Actually, I don't own much of anything.

If you enjoyed this or any of the stories on this site, please take a second and send the author a review. It only takes a second – and it really, really makes a difference.

The Ex Widow Bartowski

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Better the second husband of a widow than the first. – French Proverb

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When Casey came looking for Sarah, it wasn't hard to spot the carnage of mangled ATVs wrapped around that tree. When he pulled up, he could see Sarah sitting numbly with her back against the tree. Her face looked a bloody mess. It was hard not to notice the giant goose egg on the left side of her head that made her face look sort of lopsided. Her blonde hair was now half red from the gash that was plain on her forehead. But her injuries weren't the first thing that Casey noticed, it was her eyes. They were lifeless… totally defeated. If she was even aware of his presence, she made absolutely no indication.

Of course Casey's first priority was to check on Shaw and make sure that he could no longer pose a threat. Or at least he assumed the man lying there was Shaw. Once he walked up he saw that a good part of his head was missing. He also noted with some amusement the red stain surrounding where his crotch used to be. "I think that maybe you got him," he called over to Sarah with a healthy dose of sarcasm. "Going for both heads I see, very thorough."

When Sarah didn't respond, he walked over to her. "Let's get you to the hospital," he said. "You look a mess."

When Sarah still didn't respond, Casey knelt down and gently grabbed her arm. "Come on," he said. "The battle is over. You're hurt. We have to get you looked at."

Sarah didn't turn to look at Casey. But she jerked her arm away. "Leave me alone," she said numbly. "That bastard shot Chuck. He's gone. He died in my arms. So my life is over. I have no place to go. I'm just going to sit here and die."

Casey knelt to get his mouth as close to Sarah's ear as he could without actually touching her. "Listen to me," he said firmly. "Chuck is not dead."

One of the giant tears that were filling Sarah's eyes fell down her cheek. "Yes he is, Casey," she said. "Do you really think there was any chance that I would leave him there alone if he was still alive? I made sure that he didn't have a pulse before I left."

"Are you a coroner or a doctor of some kind that I don't know about?" Casey asked incredulously. "Are you really qualified to pronounce somebody dead? When I say that he's not dead, I'm not saying that I have a feeling. I'm telling you, dumb ass. Ellie and I found him and she went with him on the chopper to the hospital. I just got off the phone with her. Chuck is in surgery. Devon is in the room observing as we speak. She gave me the standard lecture about there's always some risk with surgery, but she expects him to be okay. To be honest, she was far more worried about you. So if you would stop being so fucking stubborn we could maybe get you to the hospital in time to be by his side when he wakes up. I've heard that's what wives do." Then Casey reached over and gently scooped her up into his arms.

This time Sarah didn't pull away. "Put me down," she said. "I can walk."

But Casey just kept carrying her. "I know that you could," he said gently. "I don't doubt it for a second. Hell, the truth is that you could probably carry me if you had to. But if you're going to stop being a bad-ass spy and learn to be a real girl, maybe you should just shut up and practice letting someone help you for once."

Once Casey had her in the ATV, Sarah turned to him. "Are you telling me the truth about Chuck?" she asked softly. "Or is this just a story to get me to go to the hospital? I couldn't find a pulse at all."

"I might do something like that if I was desperate enough," Casey admitted. "But I promise that I'm telling you the truth. Chuck is going to be fine. This is all over. There's really only one way to prove that to you."

"Let's get you there so you can see for yourself."

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Even with Casey being ultra careful, it was only a five minute ride back to the house, and from there only a ten minute chopper ride to the hospital. So Sarah quickly found herself in a treatment room with an ice pack on her head. The big battle was that the attendants wanted to put her on a stretcher. Naturally that wasn't going to fly. Sarah was insistent, like only Sarah could be, that she could walk. Casey finally brokered a compromise before any real hostilities broke out and Sarah rode from the chopper in a wheelchair.

Sarah's black mission clothes were torn, dirty, and a bloody mess. So they brought a gown for her to change into. Casey left, ostensibly to give her some privacy to change. But Misty was just being transferred to her real room. Sarah just barely had the gown in place when Ellie breathlessly burst into the room wearing doctor's scrubs.

"Hey sweetie," she said as she walked around to help her fasten the dreaded hospital gown and give her a hug. "How are you feeling? I've been worried sick about you. Don't worry. After you shower, we'll find you something better to wear. But let's get you stitched up."

"How's Chuck?" Sarah asked nervously.

"He's still in surgery," Ellie said. "Don't worry. Devon is in the room observing. I just talked to him. It's going quite a lot better than they feared. In fact, we're going to have to hustle a little if we want to get you in the recovery room before he wakes up."

"Ellie," Sarah said sadly. "Are you telling me the truth? I mean, please don't hide anything from me. I'm sorry to say it like that… but I couldn't find a pulse."

"That's not so unusual," Ellie said calmly. "He was bleeding pretty heavily. When blood pressure drops that rapidly and the patient is in shock, it's hard to find a pulse with your fingers, even for a professional. And you were in the dark on a cement floor, your own heart was beating a million times a second, and you were scared to death. We were right behind you. If you had waited for a few seconds more Casey and I would have been there. If we had been a few minutes later, Chuck might not have made it. But I had his bleeding slowed and a blood transfusion in him in seconds. And we were in the chopper on our way here within five minutes. They had him on the table before the chopper blades had even stopped spinning."

Sarah still looked skeptical so Ellie walked around to face her and grabbed both of her hands. "Sweetie, I want you to think about something for a second," she said. "I don't blame you for being scared. You've been through hell. I can't imagine what you were feeling in that barn thinking the worst had happened. But you need to ask yourself this question. If Chuck was dead, could I possibly be this giddy?"

As scared as Sarah was she had to admit, it was a very, very, very good point.

"I need you to listen to me," Ellie continued with a smile. "It's true that Chuck has been seriously hurt. Gunshot wounds are no laughing matter. He is going to be in the hospital for a couple days. When he gets home, he'll need his wife to take good care of him. He'll be spending a lot of his time on the couch or in bed for a week or so. He might experience some tenderness for as long as a month. There is an outside chance that he'll eventually need some physical therapy to restore the full range of motion in his shoulder. But soon your husband will be back to his unbelievably nerdy, good as new, self. Your biggest challenge is going to be waiting on him hand and foot for the next month. I don't envy you that duty. Trust me. He loves to be babied. He's not above using guilt. He is going to milk that for everything you'll let him get away with."

Sarah didn't know what to say. The news seemed too good to be true. She wouldn't totally believe it until she saw him. But now she had hope… and the associated worry that came along for the ride. She had to spend a long moment blinking away the relieved tears. "So why are you so giddy?" she finally asked.

"Remember in Cancun when we were sitting there watching the news reports of the DEA Agents being rescued?" Ellie asked with a grin. "It seems pretty ironic. We were waiting for Chuck to wake up then as well. Remember how on cloud nine we were?"

That actually got a faint smile from Sarah. "Well, mostly you," she said.

"That's true," Ellie admitted. "But this is ten times as bad. The coup attempt is the story of the century. And unlike Cancun, this time they know our names. The hospital is literally surrounded by mobile news vans. There are enough reporters downstairs to fill a football stadium. They're flashing our pictures on every channel. They seem to be paying extra attention to us girls for obvious reasons, especially you and Misty. She is now the most famous cocktail waitress who's ever lived. We're famous national heroes. Well, international heroes actually. I saw on the news that the President just called the British Prime Minister to thank him for Cole and Brigid's assistance. There's talk that he might even get knighted out of the deal. Once that happens there'll be no living with him. He'll be expecting everyone to call him Sir Cole."

"Oh lord," Sarah replied sarcastically with a little broader of a smile. "We'll probably have to curtsey whenever he walks into the room. Thank goodness Brigid is here to keep him in check or he'd probably have us all surrounding him in our bikinis, fanning him and feeding him grapes."

"I haven't met Brigid yet," Ellie said. "But from what Carina tells me, I don't think that will be happening. That reminds me. We don't have time for it now… but Carina… engaged? You owe me a story."

"I know," Sarah agreed. "If you can believe it, it's actually kind of a sweet love story. I was just teasing about Cole." Then her eyes narrowed. "This isn't your hospital," she said. "Why are they letting you act as a doctor?"

"I'm not sure if I'm technically even licensed to practice here," Ellie said with a laugh. "But it doesn't matter because they're scared to death of me. The President was here personally just about an hour ago. He actually hugged me. He also very loudly made it incredibly clear that we're to get whatever we want or need. They have been falling all over themselves trying to stay out of my way. I think if I told them I was hungry for fresh lobster, they would send someone to Maine to get one."

After Ellie stitched up the gash on Sarah's forehead, she waited patiently while Sarah quickly used the sit down shower. Then she gave Sarah some scrubs. Once she was dressed she made her sit on the bed and helped her blow dry her hair. "You are really a trooper," Ellie said. "Chuck or Devon would have been crying like a schoolgirl when I put in those stitches. I couldn't use a very strong numbing agent. I wouldn't want to affect the baby."

"Baby?" Sarah questioned. "What baby?"

"They didn't tell you?" Ellie asked with a grin. "Oh my God, I thought you knew. It's another reason why I'm so giddy. With a female patient of your age, the first thing they always do in the ER is draw a blood sample and test it. It came back positive. You have a Bartowski bun in your oven." Then responding to Sarah's dazed, confused look, she decided to be a tad more on the blunt side. "You're pregnant."

"Oh my God," Sarah breathed.

"I know," Ellie said with a laugh. "It's been one hell of a day, hasn't it? I haven't had a chance to tell you this yet, and Devon doesn't even know. But I'm pregnant too."

Sarah didn't know what to say, so they just hugged for a long moment. "Maybe you should think about actually getting married," she teased. "It's not all that bad."

"Our bet on which one of us has the first boy just got a little more interesting, huh?" Ellie asked with a laugh. "Let's take you down and get you with your husband. I'll drive."

Sarah just looked at the wheelchair. "I can walk," she said. "I feel fine."

Ellie sighed. "Sweetie," she said. "I know that you think you can walk. And you probably could. But you just took a serious blow to the head. If you were a normal patient you'd be in bed right now fairly heavily sedated. But you're one tough cookie. And it's my medical opinion that what you really need is to be with Chuck. Please don't make me be the heavy doctor here. I understand that you never want to be perceived as being weak. But please. It would be silly to risk getting dizzy and falling, right? This day's been bad enough. Besides, would it really be so bad to let someone help you for once? It doesn't mean that you're weak. It means that you're loved."

How could Sarah possibly argue with that? So she gave in and sat in the chair. "Please hurry," she said. "I'm really anxious to see him."

"Okay," Ellie said with a laugh as she began to push the chair. "Just so you know. There is a speed limit."

"Oh yeah," Sarah said with her first genuine laugh.

"Since when do you obey rules?"

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Sarah was finally sitting in the recovery room next to her still sleeping husband. For the first time in several hours she was able to take a solid breath. Any other time she would have been more than a little concerned. After all, he looked incredibly pale laying there. And he was hooked up to quite possibly every machine that a hospital could offer. But he was alive. So he couldn't have possibly looked more perfect. His chest raising and falling as he breathed comfortably on his own was very visible. For now, that's all that mattered. For a long time she just grabbed his hand, put her head down on the bed over their clasped hands, and openly sobbed in relief. In fact she cried harder than she ever had before in her life as all of the morning's emotions finally came spilling out. But that was over. He was going to wake up any minute and she wanted to look her absolute best for him. She probably didn't have time to put on any makeup… and these stupid hospital scrubs weren't all that flattering. But letting him see tears when he woke up simply wouldn't do. So she took a deep breath and forced herself to calm down.

"Hello gorgeous."

Naturally, that caused her to jerk her head up. The voice wasn't all that strong. Actually it was little more than a whisper. But he was clearly awake. Sarah couldn't have kept the silly grin from her face had she wanted to. At first she just stood up and reached over to very gently kiss him.

"Am I in trouble?"

As giddy as Sarah was, that caused her to laugh out loud. Even in this circumstance, he could make her laugh. "You're in so much trouble," she said in faux seriousness. "We've talked several times about how much I hate it when you let me think that you're dead. I also believe that I told you specifically not to get yourself shot. You never listen to me on missions. Thankfully, that was our last one." Then she got a little more serious and reached up to cup his cheek lovingly. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm tired," Chuck admitted groggily. "I know that you're tired too. We've been running around like mad for the past month… and for the years before that. Can we maybe take some time and get away? Just you and me, maybe take that honeymoon that we never got? Maybe we can go back to Cancun and lay on the beach for a month?"

Sarah sat back down by his side, grabbed his good hand, and held it firmly. "When you're feeling better," she said with a grin. "Resting on the beach is only a very small part of a honeymoon. If you think that I'm going on my one and only shot at this until you're ready to perform the required duties, well think again mister. Not happening. I expect you to impress me… and my expectations are now sky high. I expect all of your best moves and then some. If you think that you're tired now, wait until I get done with you. Maybe you'll even need to step up your game a notch."

If that daunted Chuck at all, he didn't show it. In fact he looked at her with a definite sparkle in his eyes. "In that case could we perhaps take that doctor outfit you're wearing?" he asked hopefully. "It's pretty sexy. Maybe I'm not the only one who needs to step up his game a notch. How about we play a little slutty doctor? Her patient is clinically depressed. That won't fly. She has a professional reputation to think about. In order to get him healed she has to figure out some way to cheer him up. And she's incredibly dedicated to her profession. She would do anything…"

"I'll see what I can do," Sarah said with a laugh. "When you're up to it. It sounds like you've already put some measure of thought into this particular fantasy. Something your wife should know about? Did a nerd once have a crush on one of his sister's doctor friends maybe?"

Chuck smiled faintly. "That's the great thing about doctors," he teased. "You don't have to be up to it. They do all the work. They've taken an oath." But then he got a little more serious. He reached out his hand weakly to indicate the bandage on her head. "You're hurt," he said. "How are you doing? What about the rest of the team?"

"I'm only going to tell you the general stuff," Sarah said. "I don't know most of the details myself. We'll talk about them more thoroughly later. But it's all pretty good. You already know that Misty was shot. Actually in pretty much the same place you were. She's about three doors down and Ellie says she's feeling great, almost too good. She's already walking around. In fact Ellie told me that she had to give her a stern lecture about no fooling around with Casey in the hospital bed. She is expected to fully recover in about the same time frame as you are. When you take your nap, I'll go in and see her for a minute. Carina sprained her ankle pretty severely so she's going to be on crutches for a few weeks. Personally I think that she's probably embellishing it a tad so that Jeff will carry her around, but Ellie says that he doesn't seem to mind. She didn't even try and give Carina a stern lecture. That would be pointless. So everybody's being warned to very carefully knock before they go into her room. Fortunately, I think she's about ready to go home, wherever that is. Oh, and I got a mild concussion and seven stitches."

"What about Orion and Frost?" Chuck asked.

Sarah paused for a moment. She really didn't know how much to tell him in this situation. But she finally settled on the truth. "They're gone," she admitted sadly. "But you already knew that."

Chuck nodded sadly. Naturally the tears streaming down his face caused Sarah's tears to flow as well. "Ellie told me that the President is going to make a speech tomorrow honoring Orion and Frost as national heroes," she said as soon as she could get the words out. "He is going to tell the country about how they've sacrificed for the past twenty years and award them Medals of Freedom posthumously. They are going to get a monument dedicated to them next to their graves at Arlington."

"I'm really going to miss them," Chuck finally sighed as he composed himself. "It was nice living with my parents again. Who knows when we'll see them next? That actually brings up a good point. So where is our home now?"

"I have no idea," Sarah admitted. "Maybe we should talk about that. I have no idea what my hotel room in Burbank looks like."

Chuck took the hand he was holding and gently lifted it to his lips. "We can talk about that later," he said. "How are you feeling? You look drained. Maybe you should take a nap."

"How am I feeling?" Sarah asked incredulously, trying to cheer him up. "Chuck, I seriously thought you were dead. Drained? Maybe that'll catch up with me soon enough. But the honest truth is that right now I'm so happy to be the Ex Widow Bartowski that I could flap my arms and fly around this room a few times. Do you want me to prove it?"

"What about Shaw?" Chuck asked cautiously.

Sarah lost most of her smile. "Daniel Shaw is currently in hell where he belongs," she replied with a half grimace. "The sick son of a bitch is missing about three quarters of his head and all of his man parts. And that's only because I ran out of ammo. I'm sorry that you didn't get to help."

Chuck nodded. "So this is over?" he asked hopefully.

Sarah took Chuck's hand that she was holding and squeezed for all she was worth. "Yes, sweetie," she said. "This is over, for us anyway. The only thing that remains is the cleanup. We won. Now it's time for healing and to get on with our life." Sarah paused for a moment. She had actually planned on waiting until he was more alert to tell him. But she just couldn't wait. "There's something else you need to know," she said.

"Something else?"

"Yes, Chuck," Sarah said. "Something else. I just found this out myself about twenty minutes ago. But the way it turned out, you're soon going to be a daddy."

If Sarah was worried at all about Chuck being alert enough to understand, she needn't have. His grin couldn't have been any bigger. He made a big show out of lifting the sheet and looking down. "Way to go swimmers," he said.

Sarah was pretty much forced to agree. So she stood up and kissed him again. And although she was still being mindful to be extremely careful of the oxygen tube that was in his nose, this time it was a legitimate kiss. "You're right, sweetie," she said.

"Way to go swimmers."

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