"Shepard, I heard about the loss of your team member. I'm sorry." The Illusive Man said as she appeared over the hollo imager. "I trust that it won't distract you from the mission."
TIM took a long draw from his ever present cigarette. Shepard narrowed her eyes at him. If he were not a hollo image, she might have shot him. It hurt her head to scowl, so she glared.
"Kryik was an important member of my crew. He will be missed." She replied.
"The Spectre's death is regrettable, and it cost the mission the addition of another valuable member. Had I know their was a bitter past between him and the justicar, I would have found an alternate member. But now there simply isn't time. Be sure you don't let any personal feelings jeopardize the mission, Commander."
TIM eyed her warily. She didn't appreciate his callous or his threat. She crossed her arms and shift her weight toward him.
"Let's cut to the chase. What the hell did you want?"
"The turian's disabled a Collector ship. We have an opportunity to gather valuable information here, Shepard. Get your team together. I've already sent the coordinates."
The holo imager shut down before she could as any questions. She hated his dictator style of ordering her about. Something wasn't right about this mission. Activating her omni-tool she sent Garrus the message. She was about to send one to Nihlus as she scrolled passed his name, then stopped herself. He wouldn't be going on this mission. Or any mission. She selected the krogan instead. Udnot Grunt would fill in.
Shepard was pissed. Not only was it the same ship that had attacked her, but the Illusive Man had known it was a trap. As par usual, he had his reasons. After helping Thane reunite with his son and helping Garrus exact revenge on the Citadel, they were going after another derelict ship. A Reaper caught in the pull of a brown dwarf. She sat across from Thane in Life Support. Revealing his life story to her had made them good friends. It also helped her to deal with her own loss. Their common sorrow bonded them in a way she didn't share with Garrus. Though she understood his loss of an entire team, they were not life mates. He couldn't completely understand the way the drell could.
"You never told me what a Siha is." Shepard said, bringing up her question when he again referred to her with the strange name.
"One of the warrior angels of the Goddess Arashu. Fierce in wrath. A tenacious protector." Thane tentatively reached for her and then drew back his hand, uncertain if she would accept.
"I must confess, I've come to care for you." He blinked his inner eye lids. "Perhaps I'm being foolish. We are very different."
Shepard's heart pounded in her chest. Her eyes were wide with shock. She didn't know what to say. He knew of Nihlus, though he had never met him. She'd shared the stories as Thane had shared his stories of Irikah with her. He also knew how recently he had died.
"I could never replace your wife..." She replied.
Her words trailed off as she fought to control the lump in her throat. She did like him, and she couldn't deny the attraction, but it was too soon. Too close to his death. She needed more time, and time was something Thane didn't have. Maybe none of them.
"You wouldn't. You have your own place in my heart." Thane replied, his face as serene and sincere as always.
"I care for you too, Thane, but I'm not sure I'm ready to move on. Nihlus' death still weighs heavily on me. I need time."
"Time is something neither of us may have." Thane replied.
He reached for her hands. She let him take them. They were strangely warm. She'd expected the cool touch of a reptile. The tiny scales that lined his palm were smooth as silk. The sensation was very unlike a turian's hand and oddly arousing. Her eyes flicked up to meet his. She found herself pulled into the inky blackness. She wanted to be with him, but the pain was still to great.
"It is strange I should reawaken now, when there is so little time left."
He paused for a moment, feeling the warmth of her hands in his. He could see her sorrow in her dark eyes so exotically peering at him from her white features. He tried to think of something that might sooth her.
"Without death, how do we learn to appreciate life?" He said. He himself had learned this lesson almost too late. "I don't intend to let my body pass before it's time. I will watch over you." He smiled gently at her.
"I know." She said, thinking of Nihlus, thinking of Garrus.
Garrus was familiar and he had filled in for Nihlus where he could. But her bed was still empty at night and her heart was growing cold.
"Thane, I..." She paused as she studied his face. She had to deny him. It wasn't fair to either of them. he had to know that. "Thane, you're an intelligent man, and a handsome one." She noted the subtle smile on his lips when she told him that. She did her best to burn the image into her mind. "But it's too soon. I'm sorry. Perhaps if things had been different. Another life."
"I understand, Siha. I will respect your wishes. I hope you do not object to continuing our friendship."
"No. Of course not." She offered a weak grin as she gave his hands a squeeze.
A moment of silence passed and Shepard decided she should go. For the first time, Thane rose with her. She thought he meant to walk her to the door, but instead he blocked her path as she rounded the table. She looked at him, his strange and alluring eyes seemed to penetrate her soul.
"I wonder," He began, speaking low and soft, his flanging tones reminding her of another's voice she missed more than anything. "would it be acceptable in this moment to..."
His right hand went slowly to her cheek. When she did not pull away, he slipped the fingers into her loose hair, satisfying his curiosity of the alien fibers. He grinned again at the feel of it.
"Thane." She whispered.
A nervous knot built in her gut. Butterflies soon jointed it when his free hand cupped her other cheek. His face neared hers, his eyes darted from her equally dark orbs to her wanting lips. It had been so long since she kissed real lips, her forgotten desires tingled the skin in wonton for the renewed memory.
"Thane... we shouldn't..." She protested weakly.
His lips touched hers. They were not like human lips that she remembered. They were smoother, firmer without being hard. Electricity seemed to spark as the knot pushed up into her chest and the butterflies descended to her loins. Her lips parted and his tongue quickly found it's way to hers. So similar and so different. Intoxicating. Literally. Her knees felt weak and she lost her balance and fell against him. His denser muscles were hard under the smooth leather of his vest. His hand left her cheek to wrap around the small of her back and hold her to him. Her own fingers slid up his chest to run over the frills over his cheeks to wrap around the back of his crested head. Everything felt amplified. Her skin was on fire where he touched her. Her lips and tongue tingled with the pleasure of his kiss. For a few seconds she opened her eyes. His were closed, allowing himself to be lost in the moment. Her vision seemed fuzzy, brighter, as if in a dream sequence filled with a misty light. The floor beneath her feel began to feel unstable, doughy. Yet, when she closed her eyes again and let him support her the dizziness and light headedness wasn't so noticeable. She felt a gradual pressure against the back of her knees, then the sensation that she was falling very slowly. Her eyes fluttered open to see the ceiling over his cot spinning over her.
"I don't feel.. well." She said, closing her eyes and putting a hand to her forehead.
"You're hallucinating." Thane told her from somewhere beyond her vision. "You will recover soon."
"Hallucinating? Why am I..." She tried to ask but her mind was slipping from her control.
"Apparently oral contact with drell physiology has caused a reaction of your nervous system. I did not know the reaction would be so strong. I apologize."
"Thane?"
"Yes, Siha?"
She felt his hand on her face.
"Make love to me."
"Siha, you have said you are not ready for a relationship. I cannot commit my body to you outside of love. And your mind is not sound at this time."
"My mind is fine, I'm just seeing things."
She dismissed the notion and opened to eyes to see him looking down at her. His face was the only thing that didn't swirl around her. Though the colors seemed brighter. His avocado scales became emerald. The black pentagon on his forehead, the stripes and speckles were deep space. The red of his throat seemed as red as molten rock. His silvery blue chin was almost like marine stone. And his eyes. She could see his vivid green irises without excessive light surrounded by bottomless wells of black.
"Please. You are right. There is not time to dwell on the past. We must move on with what little life we have left."
"Very well. I will do as you ask. But you must understand that I do this because I care for you, not for carnal pleasure."
She closed her eyes again. She could hear the movement of fabric and the distinctive sound of zippers coming undone. Her own clothing was removed from her body by skillful hands that glided over the newly exposed flesh. She opened her eyes to see him. She'd never seen anything more beautiful. The pattern of scales and the stripes over his head and shoulders continued down his arms, hips and legs. The stark contrast of the red, hard member that protruded from him made the large, ribbed organ all the more remarkable. He seemed to be admiring her just as much as she lay seductively across his cot. He neared her slowly, then slid over her form as fluid as water. She wrapped her legs around his silken body as he settled over her. She felt the pressure of him against her wetness and closed her eyes expectantly.
"No."
She opened her eyes again to look into his when she heard the protest.
"I want you to see me. See into me as I see into you."
He cradled her beneath him as he pushed his way into her. Maintaining eye contact was difficult as she arched into him. The green centers of his eyes held her intently and she felt as though she might drown in him. He was not the same as Nihlus. A little smaller and the ridges more smooth, but his shape massaged her in a different way. His strokes were slower and more about movement than pressure and depth. He was an entirely new sensation. Every pulse, every throbbing thrust was amplified by the hallucinatory effects. His weight was crushing, but it was a welcome discomfort in exchange for the waves of ecstasy that flooded her senses. His lips were constantly on her. She moaned softly as he kissed her mouth, her chin, the sensitive skin behind her ear and along her neck to the hollow and across her collar to her shoulder. His hands curiously explored her breasts and the nipples that hardened at his touch. Her own fingers found pleasure in trailing over the stripes that decorated him. His nippleless chest was firm and smooth as it glided over hers. The flash of red from the folds of his throat enticed her lips to tease them, urging purrs and groans from the drell. He lifted himself off of her to view the point of their joining. The sight that met her eyes was colorful and beautiful. He seemed to almost be a part of her. Her lips clung to him as he slid out of her, then were pushed aside as they welcomed him back. His mouth was back on hers with fevered need as a purr rumbled deep in his chest.
Her body tensed as she neared orgasm. She moaned louder when the release came, and he with her. She could feel him release his seed within her, less waterythan turian cum and some how heavier. Unlike other species, he came as often as she did. Perhaps more, but in smaller amounts. The intensity built within her for the last time. As her body tightened around him he shuttered above her, releasing a steady stream as he climaxed for the final time. The deep endlessness of his eyes never left hers. Her own bliss followed his wake, and she gasped his name.
"Thane..."
When his body left hers she expected some of the seed to spill out, hot and wet, the way his had done. Only a little dribbled out, and even that was what had cling to him upon his exiting her. It was stickier than humans, but white, and much thicker, like plasma coolant.
The cot was small, but with some adjusting, they found a comfortable position. Most of her lay over him, her head on his chest, as he held her in his arms. She was still hallucinating. Everything had a halo of light. His fingers stroking her hair ticked her back. She sighed, content and comforted. He purred and she listened, with some regret over what she'd done, to the brief rumble and his long, labored breathes. His heart beat steadily like a clock keeping the time until his death. Could she love him now, only to loose him later? Could she survive another loss so great so soon? She let the thought pass as she gave in to sleep, her heart still heavy with the loss of Nihlus and the fleeting hope of happiness with Thane. Hours later, she rose from his bed, dressed and looked down on him once again. He was beautiful. She remembered his face when he smiled, how serene and angelic he looked when he filled her with the passion of his labor. Then she kissed him as he slept and left for her quarters.
