"See what sponging off your parents' hard work gets you?" Kenny Anderson grinned proudly as he got out of the large recreational vehicle that pulled up in front of Rick Sheridan's apartment building. The rest of their group-Alyssa Conover, Cyrus O' Donnell, Red Ericsson and Julia Winhill-were already there waiting with Rick, staring in amazement at the vehicle Kenny was driving. Kenny had been bragging about it for quite a while now, but his friends hadn't expected it to be this fancy.
"You guys like it?" he asked them.
"How much did this cost?" Red asked in amazement.
"Six hundred grand," Kenny grinned. "Color cable TV, Internet access, waterbeds, a full oven, everything you could ask for. It's beautiful, isn't it?"
As he joined the rest of his friends in packing their luggage onto the RV before climbing aboard, Rick felt like he was losing a fortune just sitting down in the vehicle. Kenny's parents had become very rich from their pulp and paper company, but Rick hadn't understood what they'd actually done with their fortune before now.
Alyssa, Cyrus and Julia had much the same reactions, although Red didn't seem nearly as impressed.
"God, you're a mooch," he said in mock disgust. "You've never held down a steady job in your life, and you don't feel the slightest bit guilty about not actually contributing to your family?"
"Not really," Kenny shrugged, the proud grin never leaving his face. "My parents have found it's actually less expensive to let me just laze around the house and never get a job."
"Come again?" Alyssa asked in surprise. "Why would it be cheaper for you not to work?"
"Remember that grease fire he caused at McDonald's?" Cyrus pointed out with a raised eyebrow.
"Or that time he melted all the frozen foods when he was working at the Safeway?" Julia reminded her with a grin.
"And then there was the incident where he accidentally played Freddy Got Fingered instead of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone to that audience of families when he was working for the movie theater?" Rick laughed.
"And let's not forget the time he flooded the basement of that Wal-Mart he was working at…" Red finally pointed out.
"Mom and Dad got sick of compensating those businesses," Kenny sighed. "It also explains why my six page resume isn't evidence of job-hopping. I have never quit a job."
"And to think," Red groaned, "our tax dollars paid for your education."
SLEEPWALKER #46
"COMING OUT"
"It's a beautiful country, isn't it?" Julia asked Red as they sat by the window after lunch later that day, Cyrus playing his Nintendo DS while Kenny slept and Rick and Alyssa took their turn driving up front.
"If you say so," Red shrugged noncommittally. "Looks pretty boring to me."
"That's because there aren't any end zones or yard markings out here," Julia rolled her eyes. "Were you planning to do any hunting?"
"I didn't get my license renewed," Red replied unflappably. "Relax-I'm only going to be shooting our beer cans."
"Gee, that's good to know," Julia muttered, looking away.
"Hey, you were the one who brought it up," Red said, somewhat stiffly.
Julia didn't reply.
"…You okay?" Red asked in some concern.
"Yeah, I just have a lot on my mind," Julia replied.
"How do you mean?" he asked. "Are you still worried about that Lightmaster freak?"
Julia flinched, as Red cursed himself for his stupidity.
"I'm sorry," he said, more gently this time.
"It's alright," Julia replied distractedly, noting how Cyrus was too absorbed in his video game to notice what they were saying. "I just don't like to think about it too much."
"So which hero was it again that saved you?" Red asked.
"The Sleepwalker," Julia smiled, her eyes brightening. "He came through for me when I needed him most."
Red blinked, somewhat surprised by the change in Julia's tone.
"You know, that Sleepwalker sounds like a pretty nice guy," Red said, raising an eyebrow. "I'd really like to meet him, or at least one of those other heroes. They don't get nearly enough gratitude for the shit they go through for us."
"How's that?" Julia asked in surprise, as Cyrus turned off his DS and came over to join them, his attention grabbed by what they were saying.
"They're just like the troops," Red explained. "They put their necks on the line so the rest of us don't have to, and too many people are ungrateful pricks. The same people who throw rocks at our soldiers when they come back from Iraq cuss out Spider-Man because he only saved them and didn't rescue their groceries. God, it pisses me off!"
"So what would you do if you were to ever meet one of these guys?" Cyrus asked.
"Shake their hands," Red replied. "Like I said, they don't get nearly the amount of gratitude they deserve."
Red couldn't have imagined how glad Julia, Alyssa and Rick were to hear him say that.
Sleepwalker paid little attention to the conversation going on between Rick's friends, instead finding himself drifting back into memories of the Mindscape. His older brother N'ogskak, one of the greatest warriors the Sleepwalker race had ever produced, had served as a mentor and protector to both him and many of his kin in the battles against Nightmare, the Realm of Madness, the Shadow King, the Dweller-In-Darkness and the many other cosmic horrors of the mental plane…
"Your warp vision is an extension of your will," N'ogskak told Terrens'k. The young warrior shook his head, the beams coming from his eyes flickering as his concentration began to waver. "Unless your will is strong, your warp beams will falter and dissipate."
"I…I do not know how long I am capable of maintaining the effort," Terrens'k gasped, as he fell to his knees.
"Will such a justification suffice if a human mind falls victim to the predations of a demon or monster because of your weakness?" N'ogskak rebuked him. "Our existence is based in its entirety on our abilities to protect the innocent and defenseless minds of the waking world from evil! You and I are the heirs to a millennia-old legacy bequeathed upon us by countless generations of our forefathers, and your failures besmirch it with shame!"
Anger flared in Terrens'k's eyes as he concentrated again, harder this time. His warp vision engulfed the large mound of crystalline stone in front of them, twisting it into a variety of bizarre shapes. From a four-sided pyramid to a six-sided cube, the mound of stone was reshaped into having eight sides, then ten, then twelve, then twenty.
The disgusted scowl on N'ogskak's face vanished, as he closed his eyes and nodded with solemn approval.
"You begin to demonstrate a proper comprehension as to the utilization of your abilities," N'ogskak commented.
A millennia-old legacy, and one he had fought to uphold since N'ogskak had disappeared more than a century ago.
"To perish as a warrior is the highest of honors for a Sleepwalker," N'ogskak told Terrens'k as they sparred with their mindrakes. "It is the ultimate expression of our most cherished ideal, that of defending those who cannot by themselves resist the incursions of the horrors of the Mindscape."
"Is there any other reason for our existence, then?" Terrens'k asked.
"From what I have seen of the human minds I have visited in my duties, the meaning and reason for existence has been one of the perennial questions that race has occupied itself with since its conception," N'ogskak replied. "Our own mentality is much more simplistic, and would likely be considered distinctly unpleasant by the human race. With so little in personal ambition, creative spirit, or individual initiative among our race, we as a people seek solely to protect the weak and innocent. In all likelihood, it would be a horrific, crippling existence for a human or any of the hundreds of other races that populate the waking world, but it has given our own lives meaning and fulfillment."
"Hence our devotion to our honor, with death in combat as the highest expression of those ideals," Terrens'k realized. "Without our ideals, we are nothing."
"Precisely so," N'ogskak approved.
Once again, Sleepwalker reflected on everything that had happened, from his imprisonment in Rick's mind to the supervillains he had imprisoned to the creation of Psyko to the lives he had saved.
What would N'ogskak think of him?
"Ann Coulter, Alex Rodriguez, John Kricfalusi, Heather Mills, Jimmy Fallon, Richard Dawkins, Michael Moore and Ward Churchill?" Rick asked in surprise.
"That's right," Red nodded. "I'm always updating my List of People I Want To Punch In The Face."
"The rest of them I can understand, but I thought Kenny was the one who hated Kricfalusi," Alyssa pointed out.
"Kenny insisted that I add him," Red rolled his eyes. "I finally agreed just to get him to stop bugging me."
"I never understood why he's so obsessed with-" Rick replied, before Kenny stopped the RV.
"We're here!" he said proudly, as he came back from the driver's seat. "Come on and get your stuff!"
As they exited the vehicle to get their bags, Rick and his friends were impressed by the Andersons' mountain cabin. It was beautifully designed and maintained, with a large deck and a hot tub, and a gorgeous view of the lake. Quaint and homey, and yet stylish and classy in its own way, it had a distinct charm all its own that was difficult to describe.
"It's all set?" Anthony Davis asked the prison guard as he was led to the trailer.
"Everything," the guard smiled. "And thanks-you saved me five hundred bucks."
"Not a problem," Anthony nodded. "These new TV sets are actually easier to fix than the old ones."
Stepping into the trailer, Anthony looked around with a satisfied smile as he saw the Barry White music ready to go on the stereo, the champagne cooling in a bucket of ice on the table next to a gourmet dinner, and a comfortable bed upon which lay a dark-haired, brown-eyed woman with vaguely Hispanic features.
"God, I missed you," Anthony breathed as he undressed. "How are they treating you?"
"Well enough," Anthony's wife Leila replied as she pulled off her pants. "I get my choice of meals, and I don't have to have a cellmate."
"I spend six weeks rebuilding the warden's car from the ground up, and that's all you get?" Anthony spat in disgust. "I mean, I've got him going from 0 to 60 in three seconds, and 45 miles to the gallon in gas mileage, and he won't even give you cable?"
"He said it'd look suspicious," Leila replied as they began caressing.
"Ah, hell," Anthony muttered. "I'll see what I can do about getting the guards to bring you over those chocolates you like. I can call in a few favors-Simmons and Hardy owe me for fixing their computers."
"God, I love being married to a prison big shot," Leila purred, as she began petting Anthony downstairs. "All the other bitches are scared of me, you know?"
Anthony only smirked. Ever since all the other non-powered supervillains had escaped from Attica Prison, the Shocker, the Porcupine and Bullseye had come back after being defeated by their heroic enemies. The non-powered supervillains, the ones who used specialized equipment or armor to commit their crimes, had always been a group apart at Attica. Feared by the rest of the inmates for their intelligence and brutality, the supervillains were known to cut deals with crooked prison guards for preferential treatment and better food. Anthony was a step above even them, realizing the benefits of staying in prison and serving out his sentence.
For now, though, the only thing on his mind was his gorgeous wife and the sweet love they were making.
And the passion was glorious.
Rick cursed as the gunshot flew into the woods, missing the beer can yet again.
"God, you're an even worse shot than Alyssa," Red teased, as he took the pistol back and knocked the can off the deck railing with an expert shot.
Alyssa merely scowled at this. She had only agreed to take a shot after Red had teased her into it, and the only thing she'd managed to hit was the deck. Disliking guns as a rule, she and Julia could only look on in disgust as Rick and the other guys took turns shooting out their beer cans. It hadn't helped that they were already drunk, having each consumed several beers before lining the cans up on the deck railing and shooting.
"Men," Julia rolled her eyes as she sat back down next to Alyssa, having gotten up to get another beer. "Either they need the biggest gun, the loudest stereo, or the most powerful engine. I mean, are they all compensating for something downstairs, or what?"
"You have to remember, though," Alyssa replied in a mock-philosophical tone, made even more ridiculous by her own slurred speech, "that we're the ones who're always going after the most expensive shoes, the best purses, and the most fashionable outfits."
"That's entirely different," Julia shook her head, as Rick's cries of joy followed a successful gunshot. "Even today, the patriarchal power structure has largely channeled women's self-images and perceptions of success into being based on their physical attractiveness," she proclaimed authoritatively.
"Says the girl who spent a hundred bucks on those hiking boots," Alyssa scoffed, pointing to Julia's footwear.
"You're one to talk!" Julia shot back. "You've got more pairs of Converse than I have shoes altogether! I mean, who spends $200 on Converse shoes in one shopping trip?"
"They were on sale!" Alyssa argued. "And besides, you were the one who dragged me into that store in the first place, gushing about those Ugg boots you saw!"
Having emptied the clip on Red's gun and shot down all their beer cans, Rick and the other guys stopped what they were doing and sat down to watch the far more entertaining spectacle of watching Alyssa and Julia argue while drunk.
Sitting in his cell at the Ravencroft Institute for the Criminally Insane, the severely disturbed man who called himself the Chain Gang rocked back and forth, quietly mumbling under his breath. His fractured mind drifted back to the memories he had of conversing in the prison cell with Ray Morgan, Hector Fuentes and Ernie Mills, who had all died from the radiation they were exposed to, but whose personalities now lived on within him.
"How the hell you'd end up with a bunch 'a grunts like us, anyway?" Willis Hayworth asked Ray curiously.
"Rather unusual circumstances, I must admit," Ray shrugged, "but suffice it to say that military service was a prerequisite for my inheritance."
"Inheritance?" Ernie grinned, dollar signs in his eyes. "Old man wouldn't cough up the dough 'less you wore the uniform, right?"
"Quite," Ray nodded. "I enlisted, went through training, and served in communications."
"So what happened?" Hector asked. "How'd you get busted down to buck private?"
"Suffice it to say that I could not restrain myself from making pithy or sarcastic observations about how gentlemen like Wilson Fisk or Simon Utrecht were profiting off the blood of our soldiers and the misery of the Iraqis," Ray explained. "Apparently, freedom of speech is far more desirable in civilians than it is in members of the armed forces."
"So how much you stand to make when you get back home?" Ernie asked again.
"Some seventy million dollars," Ray replied, noting the gleams that came into the eyes of his fellow inmates. "It's far more likely that I'll be disinherited after this debacle…should I ever even return alive, that is."
"So that's it, then? You're not gonna do anything else?" Willis asked.
"In truth, I was never particularly enthused with the money," Ray shook his head. "Had I inherited it, I would have used it to further my intellectual pursuits and study of military history. Indeed, Iraq itself has a particularly fascinating background with the many battles that raged for control of this land, back when it was known as Mesopotamia."
"Uh…yeah, whatever," Ernie muttered. "So, assuming you can't ever get your mitts on the cash, what'll happen to it?"
"By that, I take it you mean whether I have any objection to your attempts to obtain it somehow," Ray only smirked. "Rest assured I am not bothered in the least by your proposal. Should we return home, I will be happy to make whatever effort I can to obtain the money and share it with you, my brothers in arms. And should I not return home, I bequeath it all to you. Do what you will to obtain it, for it is no concern of mine."
"How poetic," Hector observed in a snarky tone. "You don't have any issue with us robbing your family blind?"
"Not particularly," Ray said dismissively. "I have no siblings, and none of my relatives have proven themselves to be petty egomaniacs who are interested in little more than their own personal pleasures."
"Can't say fairer than that," Willis noted.
Willis Hayworth had later become the Chain Gang, developing multiple personalities that reflected those of his dead friends. Driven mad by poverty, rage and abuse, the Chain Gang had taken to repaying the society that had fucked him over by becoming a costumed supervillain.
Over and over again, he replayed the conversations he'd had with his brothers before they died.
By all rights, it belonged to him.
Seventy.
Million.
Dollars.
"You're going to be working as a dance teacher when we get back?" Rick asked Alyssa as they went for a hike by themselves the next day.
"Yeah," she nodded in reply. "Tap, contemporary, street jazz, and hip hop. They didn't need anyone for their pointe classes, though."
"Their loss," Rick grinned. "Were you planning to do anything else this summer?"
"My parents are coming down for a visit," Alyssa answered. "They want to celebrate the Fourth of July with us."
"…Us?" Rick asked in surprise, stopping in his tracks.
"Of course," she said in confusion. "You and me. Who else would there be?"
"Well, I wouldn't really want to intrude…" Rick said, somewhat nervously.
"Come again?" Alyssa asked in surprise. "Rick, come on. You're my boyfriend. What are you so nervous about?"
"I don't want to seem like I'm getting too…uh…" Rick trailed off.
"What are you talking about?" Alyssa asked in concern.
"I really don't want your parents getting the wrong idea, is all," Rick said in some embarrassment.
"Oh come on," Alyssa shook her head. "I know my Dad seems really intimidating, but he's a teddy bear once you get to know him. Besides, he knows you. We all grew up together, right?"
"Well, yeah…" Rick said, still seeming unconvinced. "I just…I don't know…"
"Come on, Rick," Alyssa tried to reassure him. "All our parents-Kenny's, Julia's, Red's, Cyrus's, yours and mine-they all knew each other. They watched us grow up. You don't need to worry about that…"
Rick didn't say anything, not even looking at Alyssa as they trudged along.
"That's not all there is, is it?" she said in concern.
"…No," Rick muttered. "As a matter of fact, I've been thinking…"
"What about?" Alyssa asked.
"Sleepwalker," Rick said. "I'm having second thoughts about letting the guys know about him."
"What? Why?" Alyssa demanded, her voice taking on an edge as she heard this.
"You said it yourself," Rick pointed out. "What if one of Sleepwalker's enemies finds out about-"
"Stop. Right. There," Alyssa ordered him.
"What…?" Rick said in surprise.
"We've been over this," Alyssa reminded Rick, putting her finger on his lips to silence him. "You are not, and I mean not, going to start keeping secrets from us again. You know the trouble it's caused. And the guys' knowing won't matter if any of Sleepwalker's enemies find out about your connection. They'll come after us anyway."
"I just don't want-" Rick tried to reply, before Alyssa put her finger on his lips again.
"I know you don't," she reassured him. "That's one of the reasons I'm sticking this out-I'm not happy about it, but I know Sleepwalker's a part of our lives. He's a part of all our lives, and the guys deserve to know about him."
"You're right," Rick said with a sad smile. "I'm just kind of scared, is all."
"We all are," Alyssa said. "But hey, that's what guys like Sleepwalker are for, right?"
"I guess so," Rick chuckled. "Thanks a lot, Aly-I don't know what I'd have ever done without you."
"Likewise," she giggled back at him.
After dinner the next night, as Rick and his friends were sitting around the firepit, Rick stood up, as Julia and Alyssa both tensed.
"Uh, guys?" he began.
Kenny looked at Rick curiously, Cyrus leaned back and Red leaned forward, a look of keen interest on his face.
"I have something I need to tell you," Rick continued. "It's something I've been keeping secret for a really long time now."
"How do you mean?" Cyrus asked.
"You remember last year, how it suddenly seemed like I had a nervous breakdown and everything went to pot?" Rick asked tentatively.
"How could we forget?" Red said dryly. "I always wondered what was up with that."
"Well, now I'm going to tell you," Rick asked. "You know Sleepwalker? That new superhero that appeared around the same time?"
"Oh my God…" Kenny said, before his voice trailed off in amazement. "You're Sleepwalker?"
"Not quite…" Rick began.
"Oh man, this is so cool!" Kenny gushed eagerly. "I mean, I know you never rescued me, but I really appreciate the way you helped-"
"No!" Rick interrupted him. "I'm not Sleepwalker!"
"Then, what are you-" Cyrus asked in confusion.
"I don't know if you guys will believe me, but-"
"In the last decade, the world's been attacked by aliens, more and more people are taking to wearing weird Halloween outfits all year round, and we now have concrete proof that magical and psychic powers are real. I'm pretty sure we can handle whatever it is you're about to tell us," Red replied sardonically.
"Fair enough," Rick laughed. "Then let me tell you about the Mindscape…"
Rick explained to his friends all about the Mindscape, the Sleepwalker's role in protecting it and how he'd become trapped in Rick's mind, his efforts in fighting crime in New York City, and how Julia and Alyssa had eventually found out on their own about Sleepwalker's presence in Rick's mind.
Red, Cyrus and Kenny all sat there for a moment as they took in the news.
"…I guess I can see why you didn't tell anyone," Kenny said after a few moments.
"I know I should have, but I was just afraid of how you'd react," Rick sighed.
"So this alien screwed up your entire life, and you don't do anything to him for it?" Cyrus scowled. "Just let him rot, or let him die, why don't you?"
"For your information, without that alien I would have been killed three times over," Julia snapped. "Lightmaster wasn't the only villain to go after me-some weird creature calling itself a Jyn'ai would have destroyed my mind if Sleepwalker hadn't saved me!"
Everyone stared back at her in disbelief.
"…Julia?" Kenny asked in amazement.
"Yeah…I just don't like to…think about it," Julia muttered. "Besides, he saved you all from the Bookworm, too."
That sent shivers down the spines of everyone else, except for Kenny.
"So does anybody else know about this?" Red asked after a moment's thought.
"No one except us," Rick asked. "And please, please don't tell anyone about this. Sleepwalker's trying to find a way to break our bond so he can return to the Mindscape. Everything that's happened, the way I had trouble dealing with Sleepwalker being in my life, how Mom and Dad died, the fights with Lightmaster and the Bookworm, I just want to put it behind me. It happened, and there's nothing we can do to change it. And it hasn't been easy for Sleepwalker, either-there've been a couple of times I had to pull him back from the brink."
All six of them sat in silence for a while, the only noise being the crackling of the fire.
"You're cool with this?" Red asked Alyssa.
"I wasn't too happy about it at first," she admitted, "but that's the way it's going to be for now."
"Hey, we all owe Sleepwalker big time," Kenny finally spoke up. "I mean, he saved you three times, right?" he asked Julia, who only nodded.
"And he bailed you guys out when you were kidnapped by the Bookworm, right?" he continued, as Cyrus, Alyssa and Red all nodded.
"So what's there to discuss?" Kenny wondered. "We'll always be here for you, Rick. You know we've got your back."
"Besides, you're a superhero! Do you know how cool that is?" Cyrus smirked. "I mean, Sleepwalker's the guy who defeated Psyko! Twice!"
"…So now what?" Rick finally asked, a relieved smile on his face.
"I'll tell you what," Julia grinned.
Everyone looked at her expectantly.
"We all get drunk, go to bed at 2 AM, wake up with hangovers, and puke our guts out!" she said brightly.
"Sounds like a plan," Red noted, as he cracked open the first beer.
(Next Issue: As Rick and his friends sleep, the Sleepwalker is there to watch over them. But can even the silent protector hope to guard his charges against the horrors of the night when they come calling in the forms of the Scarecrow and Deathwatch? When Rick's friends are trapped in a horrific nightmare, Sleepwalker is drawn with them into a hell from which none of them may escape! All this and more in the second Sleepwalker Halloween Special: A Long Haunted Night! Guest-starring the mysterious Ghost Rider!)
