Just wanna say thank you again to everyone who reviews, favs, and follows! I super appreciate it! Also the people that PM me, I love you guys too so thank you!
I did get a sort of mean review last chapter, and I wanted to PM the person who submitted it to explain a bit more of that part that they seemed to hate so much (other than my, "mediocre music choices" and so on cuz dude wtf my music taste is the BOMBBBBBBBB) but they won't allow PMs, according to ffn, so I guess I can't message you to explain.
Have you ever read band imagines? There is a handful that are just amazing, but there are tons that are basically the same plot. You are the girl and you cut/have depression/eating disorders/etc. and you cry all the time and you run into the band member and suddenly fall in love and you're all cured. Okay no that's not how life works and that's not how those oneshots should go and those are the ones Hikaru read and hated. (and ones where people pair Xavier with Vinny. I like to imagine that those are written wonderfully but still Hikaru doesn't want Xavier to have sex with Vinny)
And I'm not bashing those people with those issues because I have a few myself and I'm sure a lot of yall do but those stories do no justice to them.
Also, I don't think my OCS are any better than anyone elses. Like seriously when did I ever bash any OC? If anything I bash my own because fucking Vinny and Xavier are idiots but I love them. As long as we're all writing stories we enjoy, there's no problem.
I mean, read how you want. You don't have to like my story, and if you don't like it, please, stop reading. Roll your eyes and shut your laptop and roll off into the sunset away from me.
For real, just go click that back button and we can part as unlikely friends.
To everyone else, thank you so much and the ending of this story will be so sweet it'll leave ya with cavities! (My friend and I just haven't quite figured it all out yet…but it shall be sweet!)
Also, might be a week before I update again. I have tons of shit going on and yeah.
Hikaru curled up in a blanket as he sipped his coffee and watched a morning news program. College was cancelled due to snow build up. Once the roads were cleared, it would resume.
He shivered as the show's anchors announced who their musical guests would be today.
The only reason Hikaru was watching this was because the musical guests was Lost in Translation.
They talked about the band and their singles, before announcing the band had released yet another single and the music video for it was being released today as well. They seemed excited, though it was their job to, as they announced the band.
Hikaru wished it was warmer. The heater was on but he was still cold as he watched them perform their new song. He didn't like the song too much. It was called 'Nicotine' and Hikaru assumed the song was about Mona, because the lyrics fit her.
"I taste you on my lips and I can't get rid of you. So I say damn your kiss and the awful things you do! You're worse than nicotine!"
He didn't know why he was so angry with the song. Of course Xavier had written songs about Monique. He probably wrote songs about all his past relationships.
"I bet I don't have a song." Hikaru grumbled, staring into his coffee mug. He decided to stop moping and call Kaoru, hoping his brother wasn't too busy to talk for a bit.
"Have you seen the music video?" Yuukio asked Hikaru when she called him later. "Marcie is in it!"
"I'm goin' check it out." He said as he pulled it up on his laptop.
Marcie and him broke up about a month after Xavier visited. She was a great girl, but Hikaru couldn't commit. Something held him back and he just couldn't do it.
The video was in black and white and the band was in some warehouse. The song started immediately and Xavier was there, hair slicked back and a cigarette in his hand. He took a long drag before he blew out the smoke into the camera and started to sing.
"Cross my heart and hope to die. Burn my lungs and curse my eyes. I've lost control and I don't want it back. I'm going numb, I've been hijacked. It's a fucking drag." He sang, annoyance clearly on his face. "I taste you on my lips and I can't get rid of you. So I say damn your kiss and the awful things you do." He held his hand in his hands as it flashed to scenes of color. Scenes where he was with a girl. Marcie, who looked so much like Monique.
"He looks cool, doesn't he? I hate the smoking, but it does make him look cool."
"Marcie…looks like Monique." Hikaru mumbled as he watched the video. He didn't know why now, as he watched it, it hurt him so much. He knew the song had to be about her. It just hurt to know he was right.
"Did the magazine come in yet?" Xavier asked Hikaru as they chatted on the phone. Hikaru was currently at school, waiting for class to start.
Going to college on his own was probably the best decision he had ever made. Sure, he missed Kaoru a lot, but they needed this separation from each other. Hikaru really needed to grow and do his own thing and learn that Kaoru wouldn't always be there to clean up his messes. He made his own group of friends and he was really enjoying himself.
"I dunno, Zave. I'm still at school." He cursed himself for using that nickname, but the two had been calling each other so much, it just slipped out. "I'm sure you look very pretty in it."
"Shut up. I don't care about how I look, I want to know what she said about us. Jackal won't let us read it yet since we need to practice and warm up for the show today. It's our biggest crowd yet, not counting talk or morning shows. He wants us to be focused. I wanted to see if you had read it yet."
"Now, Xavier, I can't break Jackal's rules." Hikaru smirked as he heard Xavier sigh. "You looked good in the 'Nicotine' music video."
"Oh, thanks. Yeah. It was awkward." He mumbled with an awkward silence after this. "How's class going?"
"Good. Exams are coming up. December fifth is our last school day." He said, happy he was halfway through November. "When are you coming home?"
"Ah, well, hm. We've added more tour dates, of course. December eighth, I think. You'll be back in Japan by then, won't you?" Xavier asked, staring out the window of his tour bus as they drove to their next venue. Stella was eating a sandwich, flipping through the channels. Vinny was lifting weights and Isaac was typing away at his computer.
"Yup. Mom is super excited to have both Kaoru and I back home." Hikaru told him, a little disappointed about not getting to see Xavier before he went home. "The new term starts up January tenth. Is it okay if I stay at your place again?"
"Oh, yeah, totally fine with me." Xavier replied, almost too eagerly. Stella glanced at him before looking back to the tv. He fiddled with a hole in his jeans as he hoped he didn't sound too eager.
"Thanks. You won't be alone for Christmas, will you?" He asked, imagining Xavier sitting in his apartment all alone.
"No. I'm spending Christmas with Vinny actually." He muttered as Vinny smirked at him. "They played rock paper scissors to see who would get me this Holiday season. Jackal is going to spend it back in France since his girlfriend wants him to meet her family. You can see why I don't want to go to France."
"Of course." Hikaru nodded his head. He saw his professor come into the room, so he grabbed his bag and left the class. His phone calls with Xavier were never this long, and he knew he wouldn't be able to focus in class. "My last class got cancelled, so I'm heading home to see if I got the magazine."
"Oh, good. I want to know what that interviewer said about me." He stood and stretched. He wondered over to grab himself a drink, before heading back to his bunk.
"I'm sure she said nice things. They're promoting you, not destroying you." Hikaru whined as the cold air hit his face. "Why is it already snowy here?"
"Because it's Baltimore and that's what weather does." Xavier chuckled as he imagined Hikaru bundled up, the wind and snow hitting him in the face. He settled down onto his bunk, moving his pack of cigarettes over so he could sit comfortably. The pack was almost empty. He had to remind himself to get a new pack whenever they stopped for gas.
"So….how are you?" Hikaru questioned as he left the campus, being careful not to slip on any ice or snow.
"I'm doing fine." Xavier answered like he usually did. Short. A lie.
"Xavier."
"Hikaru."
"Don't fuck around." He grumbled, wishing the male would be more honest. It felt like they were back in highschool. Xavier had closed himself off again.
"I'm doing as well as you'd expect me to. I have fucking depression and high anxiety so it's not like I'm doing fabulous." He spat out, irritated. "Some days are rougher than others but I'm doing fine. I'm in a better place than I was last year. I'm working on it." He went silent after this, running a hand through his hair. "I don't mean to be so mean about it but I'm doing fine. Honestly."
"You haven't smoked lately, have you?"
"No. Last smoke was two weeks ago." Xavier grumbled, fiddling with the pack.
"Good." Hikaru said, almost to the apartment. "You don't need to do it at all."
"Well we all gotta do things we don't want to do." Xavier felt like smoking now, but he was fine. If he needed to, Vinny would scratch his back and make him feel better. Talking to Hikaru hurt so much, but it felt so great at the same time.
"You do a lot of things you don't want to do, Xavier." Hikaru murmured, hoping Xavier wasn't throwing his life away.
"But I'm doing so many things I've been wanting to do for forever." He sighed, getting out of his bunk. Being coped up on the bus is what got to him most. He needed to go jogging and burn off his excess energy, but he also felt like sleeping the day away. "This…this is what I wanted. I gave up everything."
"Was it worth it?"
"Some of it, yeah." He nodded his head, feeling his heart break a bit. He wanted Hikaru here with him now. He wanted him here all the time. Maybe things would've been different if Hikaru had come to America with him all those years ago. "I'm happy."
Hikaru didn't know what to say to this. He entered the lobby, went to their mailbox and got the mail out of it, and rode up the elevator. "I'm glad."
Xavier perked up at this, hearing those words. "Thank you."
"The magazine came in." He said as he entered the apartment. He locked the door behind him, tossed his bag onto the couch and plopped down, going through the mail. "Ah, I gotta let you go. "
"W-Wait! I wanna know!"
"Nope, gotta go." Hikaru chuckled and hung up. He leaned back on the couch and looked at the cover.
"Our Love Affair with Lost In Translation!" The cover read. They were on the front of it. Stella was winking, sticking her tongue out, Isaac was next to her, looking off past the camera, Vinny was flexing, showing off his muscles, and Xavier was in the front, running his hand through his hair and looking annoyed with the others.
He looked damn good.
He opened the magazine, flipping to the section about them. He found the article, written by Julie Skyes.
"I spent two weeks on tour with these crazy guys, and girl. This band…well…imagine if you put a drummer like Travis Barker, a bassist like Pete Wentz, a guitarist like Jack Barakat, a singer with Patrick Stump's amazing vocal range, and tie it up nicely with the stage presence of Panic! At the Disco. That's what Lost In Translation is. They all each have their own style and way of doing things, and it was never boring. I sat down with them often and spent a lot of time figuring them out." Hikaru scanned through her intro, talking about them performing and their music. He was happy to find that she wrote a whole page about each of the members. He skipped through the others, promising to go back through and read it later, and went straight to Xavier's.
His two page spread had dialogue on one side, and the other page had a close up picture with multiple smaller pictures. His large picture was of him smirking, looking straight at you, which would make any girl squeal. The smaller pictures were him singing, asleep with Vinny and Stella on top of him, working out, and hanging out with Jack and Alex.
"I sat down with Xavier one rainy day. He was sitting by an open window, letting the wind hit his face and a few droplets of water. I was a little unsure if I could interview him now, but Vinny said they all did the same thing. Vinny worked out, Isaac sat on his computer, Stella played on her phone and watched TV, and Xavier stared out windows. I took his word and went to talk to Xavier. Surprisingly, he was happy to talk to me (I previously thought he didn't like me. Turns out I was completely wrong) and he gave me all of his attention. That was the first thing I noticed about him. When you spoke to him, all his attention was on you. He nodded his head, his eyes never left yours. I could talk about hula-hooping and he would still listen. So, I decided to start my interview."
"Xavier Labelle was born in France to his parents, Jaqueline, a famous actress in France, and Akio, a stern Japanese business man. He grew up there, before he transferred to America for two years to attend a music academy in California, where he met Stella and Isaac. After two years, he was sent back to France, before being sent to be with his cousin at Ouran Academy in Japan. He stayed there for eight months and made many friends, who he told me were important factors in life. 'I still talk to them all the time.' He told me with a small smile. He traveled back to America multiple times, which is when he met Vinny and the two, surprisingly, hit it off and became best friends. After a few incidents, involving his tattoo - lyrics from his favorite All Time Low song-, a lip piercing, and getting signed to a music label, he told me his was quickly disowned from his family, and took his mother's maiden name. He moved to America with his uncle, his manager."
"Most of this I already knew, but I figured this was enough for one interview and I thanked him. I later caught him, once again by a window, but this time a cigarette in his hand. He sighed deeply, blowing out smoke. I approached him, a little worried he would be angry, but he let me sit next to him as his finished his cigarette. I hadn't seen him smoke much, so I asked him about it. When did he start? Why did he smoke? I also went further, asking about his family and also his mental illnesses that he never hides. He answered."
"'I started when I came back from Japan. It was so rough, everything was really rough. I was already told I had depression, but honestly, I think anyone could tell you that.' He took another slow drag from his cigarette, thinking of what else to say. 'I never handled my problems well at all. I just shut them in. My father didn't believe in them. I was just so used to being depressed, honestly, it felt normal to me. I've been like this since I was thirteen. I knew it was coming but the disownment was a lot rougher than I thought it would be, honestly. The smoking is new, but, it really helps when I have panic attacks. It gives me something to focus on and slows my breathing. If the others are around, I go to them, but sometimes, it's just easier to light up. I'm not addicted at all, honestly. I could put this cigarette out and never smoke again if I wanted to. I know, it's not good for me, but, not a lot of things are now a days. It helps a lot. Depression sucks. It really does. It's not romantic or charming as some people like to make it out to be. It really sucks, but it's a part of life. I'm not going to let it stop me from living.'"
"I was surprised at how open he was being. He wasn't as open as Vinny and Stella, but he wasn't as quiet as Isaac. I was told by the others that Xavier was affectionate and sweet, he just didn't like to show it. I decided to ask more, because Xavier was interesting. I asked him about his songs, what were they about, and what could we expect in the future? 'Ah, well, lots of the song are about my family. The only one I'm close to is my uncle, Jackal. Lots of the songs I wrote when I was younger. A few songs are newer ones I wrote, like Nicotine and our next single, which I guess I must keep hush hush. Surprisingly, none of the songs on here are about my exes. The love songs, if that's what you want to call them, are about someone I let slip through my fingers, which really hits me the hardest. Uh, it's just..' he trailed off at this, running his fingers through his hair. 'I fucked up a bit. But, they fucked up too. The next album is….well Vinny thinks it's going to be filled with love songs and hate songs. He tends to favor those love songs a lot. Stella likes the upbeat ones, especially when she gets to sing, and Isaac likes the ones where I put piano parts. The next album will probably be angier.'"
"I asked him about his friends, and he smiled the whole time. 'My friends are my everything, honestly. I dunno where I'd be without them. Probably dead in a ditch somewhere. All of them, not just my bandmates. All my friends are important. Even Yuukio. She's been my best friend since Japan. We hated each other so much but now I really have to talk to her once a day, or it just doesn't feel right. I just owe a lot to my friends. They keep my going even on my roughest days. One of my friends is actually living with me now while he goes to school. He's making sure my house stays decently clean. Maybe I can actually get a cat and he'll take care of it for me while I'm away?' He laughed at this, shaking his head."
"To wrap it up nicely, Xavier is a sweetheart. He adores his fans and his friends and music is his number one right now in his life. He says his dream is to be what to a fan what All Time Low is to him."
Hikaru read through it a few more times. He mentioned Hikaru in this. That made him so unbelievably happy.
