Chapter 55: 36weeks Along
My feet hurt, my back hurts, my boobs hurt. I know its coming soon. I feel it in my body, preparing to give birth. Its strange to know that in no time at all, this little boy and girl will be here and its up to me to protect them. Kylan and Ana are my whole world and I havent even met them yet.
Iv had no more alluring visions. I feel like the last one was a warning and then they stooped. Their powers will be uncontrollable when they are toddlers. I want to make sure they get the best training I can provide. Iv been studding holos and reading old books left here about Jedi ways. I think it makes Leia feel like im actually apart of the resistance and if Kylo is dead, I have to accept that I am. Though I much rather be with Kylo... but I press on.
Right now Im laying in the field, soaking up the sun. Maz was able to locate me some rather comfy dresses for my big belly. I much appreciate her. She doesn't hover like Leia, she just can sense when I need something. Just thinking about the other visions Ana has shown me in the past worries me. Specially the one about Finn. In my hand im holding a holo about visions. I havent opened it yet. I waited till I could be completely alone.
I take a deep breath and open it. I read about how visions can come true. How some have predicted a war before starting. Some have predicted huge deaths and the outcome of polls. There is so much research here about the origins of visions. The part that caught my attention was the part about visions being wrong, or visions going off feelings. They are rare but can happen. There are ways to prevent visions, thats why the gift of visions was used across the galaxy, visioners captured and held prisoners by kings, emperors, rulers, anyone of high power or the highest bidder.
I grab my stomach, thinking that if someone finds out that they would take them. If Kylo doesnt kill Snoke, he would find us and take my babies and raise them for his use. I will never let that happen. I throw the disc across the field in anger and stomp away. Maybe she is showing me what she wants me to see and the thought upsets me. Because she has shown me Kylo, them together playing. Was she just projecting what I want to see...
Finn still wont talk to me, I have approached him several times and he just walks away. Poe told me he came to protect me. He is still mad but wants to make sure im safe. I fight with myself about the decisions I made. My body still craves Kylo so bad but each day seems to get a little easier to be apart. My mind setting into a different mode, mom mode. I have pushed him in the back of my thoughts, not wanting to think about him and rip open the hole that is left. Im worried about not being able reconnect with him if he comes back.
"Rey!" A far voice cries out. Its Poe, I see him walking towards me. His black hair glistens in the golden sun, he has been so sweet to me, so comforting. He knows the hole in my heart is raw and he doesnt try and ask about it. "Rey, im glad I found you. Dr. Jeckle would like to run a few tests. He says its getting close." I roll my eyes at him.
"You mean Leia wants him to run more tests." I say to Poe. He chuckle a little.
"Yeah, I guess its more her than anything. Shes worried about you thats all." He says, his eyes melt into a sad look.
"Its fine, Ill go. I know its getting close anyways." I smile at him. He holds his arm out for me to put my arm around for support. Such a gentleman. Together we walk back to the castle. Laughing about how Burg snores so loud in his sleep you can hear it throughout the castle. Poe always knows how to put a smile on my face. Im thankful he is here. I lean my head on his shoulder the rest of the way.
Once inside the house I take a seat on the sofa and Poe sits across from me in the big chair. He usually observes the exams, I dont think he trusts Dr. Jeckle but I dont understand why. I can tell Poes presence makes him nervous. I almost ask Poe to leave but its comforting having him here, he can distract Leia if she becomes to hovering. I catch Poes wink when the doctor takes my wrist to examine my veins. Hes checking my blood flow apparently. I dont really know. I dont ask him alot of questions because I just want the examine over as fast as possible. I rather doing anything other than sitting here being observed like a animal in a cage. Kylan and Ana roll around kicking and punching my insides. I know Im going to miss this someday but right now I feel like a whale and would like my old body back.
"All done, I suggest you stay off your feet the rest of the day." Jeckle says.
My heart sinks. Another day of "bed rest". Yay. I get up and slowly make my way up to my room to take a nap. I run into Leia on the stairs.
"I didnt know you were back inside already or I wouldnt of came downstairs. Do you need anything? Do you want me to run you a bath? Do you need more blankets?" Shes hovering again but for once her idea of a bath sounds amazing and decide to take her up on the offer.
She wraps her arm around my back and walks with me back to my room. I let her do her thing while I wait sitting on the edge of the bed. Memories of Kylo pushing into my mind. My heart feels empty, my stomach drops, and I break out in a small cold chill. I ache for his touch. To see his face again. To have his arms around me. I close my eyes and push the memories back. I cant be weak now. I cant give in now when I am so close to giving birth. Leia emerges from the bathroom and looks into my eyes. She knows im hurting bad and I think she hovers because she feels guilty that its her son.
"Thank you. A bath is going to feel amazing." I say and get up and walk towards the bathroom. Giving her no room to talk or acknowledge my breaking heart.
The next day I feel more revived. After a long bath and then a good night sleep I could defiantly use a good walk. I creep down the stairs and no one is around so I tiptoe out the front door and out to the lake to a worn patch of grass that I love sitting in. It gives me the perfect look or the lake and I can also rest my back against a tree. My peace. Im just trying to take it one day at a time. I hope that he turns the connection back on or else he wont be able to find me and the thought bothers me. I want to figure out how he was able to stop it, I thought it was impossible once we had sex or maybe once we conceived the babies. Maybe the book was wrong or he lied to me.
I close my eyes and just rest. I dont know why I keep being told to stay inside. Its so nice out here, and Maz is the one who told me its safe. Leia is very protective. Just like Kylo knew she would be of me. I run my hands over the large bump.
"I promise babies, I will always protect you." I say to them and smile. I slowly start singing a melody to them while resting my eyes and I dose off to a peaceful nap.
"Hey, wake up." A small nudge on my shoulder wakes me up. I slowly open and rub my eyes.
"Finn?" His blurry silouette comes into form. He stands up from next to me and extends his hand to help me up. Its the first time we have really been face to face since he got here 3 weeks points to the clouds. The sky is growing dark and the rumble of thunder is in the distance. "Its about to storm out. I just want to make sure you get inside before it rains. You dont need to get a cold."
"Where is everyone." His kind gesture throwing me off.
"They went to to check in on the other Resistance bases. I guess something is going on. Dr. Jeckle and Burg are in their rooms. Iv been keeping an eye from the roof when I heard the thunder and thought it be good to bring you inside." He says. He turns to walk to the castle. A drop of water lands on my cheek.
"Well thank you Finn. I defiantly dont want to get caught out in the rain. I appreciate it." I say to him. He doesnt respond. He holds my elbow for support as we walk to the house. Halfway there the rain starts, like a dam broke in the sky. It was raining so hard I couldnt see where I was going. Finn never letting go of my elbow.
"THIS WAY!" He yells from right next to me over the loud rain. Somehow we make it back to the castle, I stop in the doorway to look out through the rain. The sky dark as night. Thunder rumbling loud and lightening striking the ground near the castle. Finn pulls me back and shuts the door. I hear the pounding of foot steps down the stairs from behind me.
"Are you okay Rey? Sit down, let me examine you." Burg says.
"Im fine." I snap. Annoyed with their hoverness. Burg quietly sits down on a nearby sofa while Dr. Jeckle follows me to the kitchen area because I was going to grab a warm drink to bring upstairs with me. I whip around, "Can I please be alone. Geesh." I shove past him and decide to just go upstairs and change my wet clothes. But I notice at the bottom of the stairs Finn is laughing.
"What?" I say.
"Nothing, come on... like I said before, you dont need to get a cold right now." I walk up the stairs, Finn following behind me. When we get to the top of the stairs I stop and look at him.
"Why are you following me? For weeks you havent said anything to me and now you want to help?"
"Stop it, you know I care about you. Thats why im here but you have to understand..." He looks me up and down. "Your pregnant with his kids, that a tough one for me to swallow. I know what type of monster he is, I have seen it first hand. Im worried about you. That he is using you... What if he decides to kill you after and was just using you to make an heir for him...and you went back to him how many times..." He points to my stomach.
"Ana and Kylan will be safe where ever I am. Im going to protect them. The second they are out I will be able to use my force again without putting them in danger. And Kylo would never harm us. He loves us." I say. "But I realized he is to dangerous for us to be around." I lie to him, truth is he wanted to leave us... to risk his life for us. Such a selfless act. I turn around and slam the door in Finns face. Leaning against it. The tears starting. I walk over to the window. The rain falling hard against the outside of the curved glass. I put my forehead against it, its cool to the touch.
It starts in my knees and travels up. Cold shivers unlike anything I have felt before. I walk towards the bathroom hoping a warm shower will help. I stand under the water, watching it waterfall down my breast and stomach. The warmth welcoming. The thunder booming through the castle. One in particular makes me jump and I decide to get out of the shower. I dress in warm clothes and sit on my bed and brush out my long hair. I turn and lay down, watching the rain hit the window and my eyes fall heavy.
Someone pounds on the door startling me awake.
"Come in." I say. Poe barges in out of breath.
"We need to leave right now!" He yells. I jump out of bed.
"When did you get back, how did you even fly in this?" I ask. wondering when they even got back.
"The First Order is attacking Maz's Castle. They must know your here. We need to leave." I waddle over to the door. I have a bag packed for in case this happens. I pick it up but Finn grabs it out of my hand and leads me down the hallway. Another loud sound of thunder erupts from the sky outside.
"Where is everyone?"I ask.
"Everyone but Burg, hes on my shuttle. Everyone else are already loaded and gone on a separate shuttle. They are going to meet us in the new location. I dont know how the First Order found us or why they are attacking. But my main priority is your safety. And I dont trust anyone else flying you. Not even Finn. Now come on, Im right outside the door." We get to the bottom of the stairs and Poe hands me my cloak. I havent seen it in a long while. My hand shakes, Kylos memories flood my head. "No time for tears. We need to..."
The ground starts shaking and I have to grab onto the closet piece of furniture to hold steady, which is a small couch. Poe holds onto a nearby table to hold still.
"They are closer than I thought." Poe says.
What if its Kylo coming for me? It cant be, he wouldn't know where I was unless he opened the bond again.
In an instant my whole world changes.
Warm liquid flowing down my legs and puddling under me. I shoot a look at Poe who isnt paying attention. The castle still shaking.
"Poe!" I yell out. Grabbing my stomach. His eyes shoot to mine and he looks at me from head to toe... his eyes focus under my feet.
"Your water broke?" His face in horror. My stomach slightly cramping, causing me to wince. My body is going into labor. "Great. Just great." He wobbles his way over to me and wraps his arm around my back. "I need to get you on the ship, come on." And the castle stops shaking suddenly and we both look at each other.
"Lets go." I whisper. I take the opportunity of the stillness to shuffle my feet to the door, Poe opens it and I can see the ramp of his shuttle down through the rain. He looks down at me and tightens his arm around me and we walks fast through the rain to the shuttle. Once inside he sits me in the closest seat to the ramp and just runs to the controls. Closing the ramp and the shuttle takes off. Burg looks at me from beside Poe. He must register my face. I grab my stomach in another small cramp like pain. "My water Burg..." Im out of breath. "It broke" I huff. I can see through the front windows the blackness of space and the stars. But my eyes widen when The Destroyer comes into view. My mind shoots into overload.
Is it Kylo?...
Is it Snoke?...
Is it the General?...
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