Part Forty Four.

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure." ~ Marianne Williamson


The next day Addison was feeling a little better, but still pretty drained and weak.

Sitting in her living room at the house, she was wondering about whether she should go see Castiel or not. She said some things she regretted saying to him, but she still was mad at him.

Her green eyes widened as she heard Dean's voice inside of her head.

His voice was accompanied by an annoying ringing sound that she couldn't shake, finally she ported to Dean.

He was leaned up against his car in a hotel parking lot.

"What the hell did you do?" She asked, confused.

"It worked." He exclaimed surprised.

"What worked?" She asked.

"I prayed to you for help… like I do to Cas, only you answered." Dean informed her.

"I didn't know if you were alive, if your family made it out…" He started to explain.

"We're all fine." She exclaimed.

"I'm sorry for what I said before, your right. You've always helped me and Sam when you could, and I didn't have a right to act like that." Dean explained.

"Am I arrogant?" She questioned.

He raised his eyebrows.

"No, you're not stuck up." Dean replied.

"No Dean. I mean like… am I overly confident with my abilities?" She asked.

He was quiet for a few moments.

"No, I mean… you've been doing really good with everything." Dean half-lied. He didn't want to upset her, but he also thought she was getting cocky with her power.

"Good, because I'm not over confident and Cas is wrong." She said through gritted teeth.

"You two are… fighting?" Dean asked.

"I've been hiding in an angel proofed house… we did nothing but fight for 3 days." She explained.

"Anyways, why did you pray to me?" She asked.

"That's not my brother in there." Dean said, nodding towards the hotel door.

"He has been acting really strange." Addison agreed.

"Well, I'm glad you're with me on this. Bobby's playing it off, Cas is all out ignoring me. I need help Addy." He told her.

"What do you need me to do?" She questioned.

"Help me figure out what that is, because it sure as hell aint Sam." Dean said.

"Okay… I'll help you." She said.

"Hey guys." Sam said as he walked out of the hotel room.

"Good morning." Addison greeted.

"What are you doing here, Addison?" Sam questioned looking to her.

"I'm helping Dean with a case." She answered.

"Her and Cas are fighting, so she's going to tag along with us for a little while…" Dean cut in.

"You and Cas are fighting?" Sam asked looking at her.

"He thinks I'm arrogant and too young." Addison explained.

"Okay?" Sam said, confused.

"So… what case are we working?" Addison asked.

"Check this out; 4 people out of nowhere all died, killed themselves." Sam said.

"Sounds like a plan, let's go." Dean agreed.

Addison nodded and got into the backseat of the impala.

They investigated the murders and found out that people were speaking the truth to the victims, telling them everything they thought about the person; whether it mean or not.

"So root canal and Russian roulette… both of them like they were cursed, right? I mean it's like people were compelled to puke the truth all over them." Dean observed.

"Getting hit with the ugly truth till you go postal? Yeah, I'd call that a curse. Sam agreed.

The next day Sam went to check the bodies at the morgue, Addison was sitting at a bar with Dean.

"So what do you think is wrong with Sam?" Addison asked him.

"Lucifer." Dean admitted.

"You think it's the devil?" Addison questioned.

Dean nodded as he took a drink from his beer.

"You're wrong Dean, it's not Lucifer or the angels would know. It has to be something else." Addison told him.

"Like what?" Dean asked.

"I have no idea." She admitted.

"All I want is the freaking truth." Dean grumbled as he ordered a shot and drank it down.

"Well, if Cas would answer me when I called, he might be able to help." Dean grumbled.

"Cas has bigger issues than your problems with your brother." Addison said.

Dean looked at her confused.

"Uhh…" He started to say but she cut him off.

"I mean honestly, you know he's in the middle of a war and you're being selfish. Expecting him to come everytime you call him. And frankly Dean, with the way you treat him I wouldn't help you either. In fact, I'm still mad at you for what you said and how you treated me. I'm really only helping you right now because I'm bored and still hiding from Cas, and the last place he'll be is around you." Addison bluntly said.

"Well don't sugar coat it." Dean said, looking at her shocked.

"Oh my god… I'm… not one bit sorry I said that. We all know you've been going through a lot with Ben and Lisa and with Sam now, but honestly you have this tendency to think that your problems outweigh everyone else's and they don't." She continued to ramble.

"Addison?" Dean said, looking at her.

Her green eyes widened and she shook her head back and forth, covering her mouth with her hand before she said anything else mean to him.

"I'll have another." Dean said to the bartender as he shook his empty shot glass.

"Sometimes I think I can't get pregnant because god knows my marriage is a sham." The bartender told them.

Addison looked at the bartender wide eyed.

"I don't know why I just told you that." She said.

"I mean I've been snorting oxy all day." She continued, before her eyes grew bigger and the bartender continued, "Why'd I say that?"

Looking over to Addison who still had her hand cupped over her mouth, Dean said "I'm pretty sure I know."

He realized when he asked for the truth, that's what he was getting from everyone.

Once they were back in the car Addison said, "You know, I love my parents but really I wished they'd stayed dead."

Dean looked over at her.

"I had dealt with their loss and now they're back and my dad is still on about my painting and not going to college. I'm a freaking Nephilim… the strongest one yet and I'm still just not good enough." She continued.

"Addison…" Dean started to cut in.

"You know, Dean. I love Cas more than anything else, but sometimes I wish I would have just died before all this angel and demon crap started. I mean, I try so hard to seem like I've adapted to all of this… but I haven't. It's all an act… and I'm nowhere as confident as I seem." She continued.

Dean sighed heavily, "This is going to be a very long car ride…"

"I'm uncomfortable around you." She admitted.

"What? Why?" Dean asked, surprised at the statement.

"It's the way you look at me, you've been checking me out since the day I met you… and it makes me uncomfortable." She said.

Dean glanced over at her.

"Uhh… I'm sorry…" He breathed out, she was making him uncomfortable by pointing it out.

"But what makes it all even more awkward is the fact that I like the attention from you. I mean, you're really freaking hot… and it's not like I've never thought about hooking up with you, but you're my friend and that's how I want it to stay. And I'm so deeply in love with Cas that it's almost unhealthy." She said, not able to stop herself.

Her eyes widened, "Oh my god…"

He looked over just in time to see her port from the car.

"There you are, where's Dean?" Sam asked when Addison appeared beside him.

"Driving here." She admitted.

"I thought you were riding with him." Sam said.

"Yeah, until I just died of embarrassment like a minute ago. It's less awkward to be here with you." She said nodding.

"What happened?" Sam asked her.

"I'm not going to talk about it." Addison said firmly.

"Okay. Well, I found this." Sam said displaying a box.

"Oh my god… is that a cat skull?" She asked her eyes wide.

"Yeah." Sam nodded.

A little while later Dean showed up.

Addison avoided his eyes as she said, "Sam found this box with a cat skull."

"It can wait, Sam we need to talk." Dean said.

Addison looked at Dean wide eyed, she knew he was using the curse to make everyone be honest with him in his favor to get Sam to tell him what's going on.

"Okay, what up?" Sam asked his brother.

"I have a few things to ask you and I need you be honest." Dean said.

Addison quietly followed them down the stairs, hoping she'd be able to stop admitting things to Dean.

"Of course Dean, what are you talking about?" Sam asked him.

"When that vamp attacked me, why did you just stand there?" Dean asked.

"I didn't... I froze." Sam responded.

"You froze? You've been Terminator since you got back." Dean pointed out.

"I don't know… shock? But then it was too late." Sam explained.

Addison watched them talk.

Back at their hotel that night, Dean looked at the cat skull.

"So this was the chicks pet?" Dean asked.

"Well she was obsessed." Sam said as he looked at the computer.

They figured out that Veritas the goddess of truth had been invoked, and anyone in the town who asked for the truth would get what they asked for.

Once the victim kills themselves from being slammed with the truth, she gets their death as a sacrifice and her tribute.

"That's why the bodies disappeared from the morgue." Addison observed.

They figured out that the goddess was likely speaking to the masses from a job position with a news station.

As they followed the news reporter Ashley Frank to her house, Addison said. "I need to tell you guys something."

"Addy, really? Now's the worst time for talking." Dean said looking at her in the rearview mirror.

"You're just uncomfortable now that I pointed out our mutual attraction. But it means nothing, I won't ever act on it." She stated still forced to spill the truth to him.

"Whoa…" Sam breathed out, stifling a laugh.

"Anyways, I'm not at full power. I'm not sure what happened to me, but it's like I'm barely holding enough strength and power to get around. I don't know how much help I'll be." She admitted.

After Sam and Dean dipped their knifes in dog blood Addison followed them into house.

As they made their way into the dining room Addison whispered, "This entire house is beautiful. The architecture alone is a work of art, and the way she decorated it is amazing."

"We're here to gank the goddess, not for you to admire the interior design." Dean said, his voice quiet.

"Sorry." She said.

"Where's all the creep?" Sam questioned as the house looked normal.

The trio continued to make their way up the stairs of the house.

They stumbled into the room with all the bodies of the victims.

"You came for dinner." Veritas said as she entered the room and used her powers to send them flying across from the room.

When they came to, they saw that Veritas had chained them to the rails against the walls.

"Sit tight. You're up next." She said with a smile as she pointed to Dean.

Addison struggled against her ropes. She tried to use her powers to port out, or break her ropes but she couldn't; she had gotten to weak again.

Addison watched with a disgusted look on her face as the goddess pulled the tongue form the mouth of a dead victim.

Holding it up with a pair of tongs she said, "The tongue is the tastiest part. It's where the lies roll off."

"I'm gonna be sick." Addison mumbled as the goddess began to eat the tongue in front of them.

"I can't wait to eat yours. I mean, I've seen liars before… but you two?" She said looking to Sam and Dean.

"Well, while you three still have your tongues… how bout we play a little truth or truth?" She said smiling.

"Hmm… what should we ask Dean first? Something person about you?" The goddess asked looking to Sam.

Looking back to Dean, Veritas said "Hey, Dean. I'm curious what do you really feel about your brother?"

"Better now. As of yesterday I wanted to kill him in his sleep, I thought he was a monster. But now I think he's just acting like me." Dean admitted.

Addison looked between Sam and Dean.

"What about this one? What do you think about her?" She asked, motioning to where Addison was tied up.

"That she's overly-confident with her powers, and too cocky about what she is. She's just asking for trouble." Dean admitted.

Addison's jaw dropped as she looked at him.

"I'm asking for trouble? Look who's talking, half the time I'm not sure if you're working a case or looking for assisted suicide!" Addison shot at him.

"So Sam, walking back into your life must have been a relief." Veritas said, interrupting Dean and Addison's fight.

"How do you feel about reuniting with your brother?" She asked.

"What we do is hard, but we watch out for each other and that's what important." Sam said.

Addison groaned at his simple answer, she was so mad at herself for saying hurtful things to Dean.

"You're not fun… those two however…" She said as she turned back to Dean and Addison.

"Share with the class how you feel about being more Nephilim than human." She said, smirking.

Addison swallowed hard.

"I'm scared. Scared to admit it because I don't want to hurt Cas, but honestly most days I wish I had just died instead of staying alive. Because now I don't know where I'll go when I die." Addison admitted.

"Well go on… don't stop there." Veritas instructed, as she made her spill more truth.

"I gave up my chance at heaven, my only shot at peace to stay with Cas… and I kind of regret it some days, he's been acting weird. But then there are days I can't imagine it being any other way. But I can't admit that I'm upset for losing my shot at heaven, because then I have to admit it to myself and I can't handle these things." She informed the room.

"Leave her alone." Dean said, as he watched Addison struggle against her ropes.

"Oh Dean… always the hero." The goddess said as she walked back over to where Dean was.

"But Dean what do you think about her choices?" She asked him.

"I think she's naïve, she's too trusting and honestly I'm scared for her. I like Cas, he's my friend… but I think she's making a mistake and trying too hard to help him. She always tries too hard with people." Dean said, unable to stop himself.

"I do the best that I can, I'm trying to handle so much, and I wasn't raised to be a hunter or to fight a civil war." She shot back at him.

"If you can't handle the life, than get out. You may have been dragged into all this but you could have walked away… you just keep coming back for more hits." Dean said.

"And what? Find someone and settle down like you tried to do with Ben and Lisa? We all see how well that worked out for you!" She retorted.

"I thought I wanted out of the life, wanted a family. But I'm not a father, I'm a killer. Slicing throats is what I'm good at… I can't be normal." Dean admitted.

Looking back to Sam the goddess said, "What do you think about Addison?"

"She means well, Dean's right… she might be a little naive about things but she's doing good." He said.

She cocked her head to the side and looked at him. "You're lying."

"You said yourself I can't lie." Sam retorted.

"How are you doing that?" She asked shocked.

"I'm telling the truth." Sam defended.

Addison and Dean watched him with wide eyes.

"You're not human…" Veritas said.

While the goddess had been distracted by Dean and Addison spilling the truth, Sam had been cutting the ropes binding his wrists with a switchblade.

He threw the knife behind Dean so he could cut his own ropes and he attacked Veritas.

Addison watched from where she was still bound to the wall as they successfully killed the goddess.

Walking over Dean picked up a knife and cut the ropes binding her wrists.

"Thank you." She said.

He extended a hand and pulled her to her feet.

"Dean… I am so sorry. I can't believe I said any of that to you." Addison said as she tucked her hair behind her ear.

"I'm sorry too…" He agreed as he nodded.

Holding on the knife he turned to Sam, "You are not my brother."

"It's me, Dean." Sam said.

"What are you?" Dean asked.

"I'm me… let me explain." Sam said backing away from the knife.

"Why should I believe anything that you say?" Dean questioned.

"You want the truth? Here it is: I let you get turned by that vamp…because I knew there was a cure Dean, and I know you could handle it." Sam said.

"Ever since I came back I've been a better hunter because nothing scares me anymore… I can't feel it." Sam admitted to him.

"I don't know what's wrong with me. I think I need help." Sam said

Dean dropped the knife and punched Sam in the face.

Her eyes widened but she didn't interfere as she watched Dean beat his younger brother until he was unconscious.

Dean stood up and looked at his bloody fists, with tears in his eyes as he looked around the room.

"Hey… let's get him back to the hotel… I'll call Cas for you and we'll figure something out." Addison assured him.

"There has to be a way to fix this." Addison said as she rested her hand on his arm.


A/N- Thank you so much for reading! I hope everyone liked the update!

If anyone watches Teen Wolf, I now have 2 Teen Wolf fanfictions up titled 'Young Blood' and 'Once in A Blue Moon If you check it out, please take a few moments to let me know what you thought.

I'd really appreciate it if you'd take the time to leave a review and let me know if you read and liked this chapter. This is still one of my favorite stories to write, and I hope you're all still liking it too. ^_^